Pride: In the Name of Love
by Jezz-Ra
Summary: A violent attack on the Castle of the Western Lands leaves Inuyasha suddenly as said land's ruler with the seeming loss of Sesshoumaru. What all happened on that terrible night? - Will be YAOI and dark at times. You are forewarned.
1. Foreword & Prologue

Pride (in the Name of Love), Foreword

~ A work of fanfiction by Jezz-Ra

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Free at last, they took your life

They could not take your pride

In the name of love

What more, in the name of love?

~ Pride (in the Name of Love), U2

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Sit a while, and let me spin you a tale of dragons and demons, good versus evil, love and lust, tragedy and ecstasy and all else that lies between.

This is the first story I have ever written that I felt the need to...introduce... simply due to its sheer size if nothing else. When I first conceived this story, my intent was to make a ten or twelve chapter story to ease back into writing after a long hiatus, and this was my first attempt at the Inuyasha fandom.

I prefer to write my fanfiction relatively true to the original text. My characters are, by and large, as true to their original nature as I can write them within the parameters of the story. I keep canon storylines together, and if I deviate from some aspect, I will generally explain the circumstances surrounding how it came to be. This particular piece is set post-series - and was started at a time when I had only seen the original anime and only read bits and pieces of the manga. I had a general idea of what happened after the anime's ending, but no specifics. It doesn't matter a terrible lot, really - only minor details will be different, and those mostly in regards to Sesshoumaru. At the initial time I wrote this, I was unaware that he picked up Kohaku, unaware that he got his arm back complete with his own sword and lost his Toukijin, and other such things.

In my ignorance of the original ending of the manga, as well, I changed the way everyone parted as well. Miroku and Sango's relationship did not turn out so well (no marriage and no children), Kagome went home to her own time after several months. I'm sure there are other things I inadvertently changed as well. Perhaps one day I will rework those details in an edit - but for the most part, the original series is intact and characters are mostly true to form. You can safely assume that all the events in the anime and a good amount of what occurred in the manga also occurred in this story.

The per-chapter warning list is likely missing pieces - I was adding as I went and tried to cover everything in my first major edit, and of course not all chapters are going to contain instances flagging all warnings. But I give you this foreword, in addition to other things, as an extended warning. As this story grew, so too did the list of warnings. I suppose its like driving a car - the more miles you put on, the more roads you traverse or cities you visit, the more likely you are to crop up against an unexpected situation!

There are several issues that do indeed crop up throughout this story that some viewers may find controversial or are disturbed by. This is primarily a Yaoi (m/m relationship) story. While there are instances of Het relationships as well, they generally take a back seat. No, not everyone is gay for each other... I simply am not featuring most of those relationships here. XD

There are several instances of graphic sexual conduct, mostly consensual but a few that are not, a couple of which are incestual in nature. There are scenes of extreme violence, torture, and some gore as well as angst and depression and darkness. There are even a few instances of death, although as in most anime, death seems to be a setback rather than an ending. Some of the events that occur do cause some of the major characters to perhaps break from their standard personalities and roles in some fashions to deal with events. I also do not pull my punches with language - while I'm not overtly crude, I do indeed swear often, especially for the brash and loud sorts of characters where it simply seems fitting that they would do so. I also use the occasional...not-so-scientific term when it comes to things like anatomy.

Dire warnings, I know...but don't be dissuaded. I'm simply covering all the bases. This is actually NOT a tale of doom and gloom, ultimately... it's a tale of romance and fantasy and adventure, and for any lengthy plot to succeed, there has to be SOME sort of bad guy running around causing trouble!

I also, of course, do not have the pleasure of owning Inuyasha or anything / anyone related to the series or the universe. There are some original ideas in here, however, and the occasional original character helping to populate their world. These things are mine, expressly, and may not be reproduced without permission.

Along the way, I also wrote several side-stories, detailing bits and pieces of things touched on in this story, backstories, or a few things just for fun that helped color my versions of the characters and their lives (for example, some of Sesshoumaru's adventures when he was a child). This story, as with all my works, can be found at any of the following places. My preferred posting site is my Dreamwidth Journal - I'd love to have you subscribe and leave feedback there. No part of this story may be reproduced or archived elsewhere without my permission - but if you ask, you likely shall receive.

My personal archives, for this and all other works are as follows :

Dreamwidth - jezzra. dreamwidth. org/

AFF - inu. adultfanfiction. net/ authors. php? no = 1296867178

FFnet - fanfiction. net/ u/ 1431121/ Jezz _ Ra

Mediaminer - mediaminer. org/ user _ info. php/ 172417

Ao3 - archiveofourown. org/ users / JezzRa

Any questions or comments, please contact me via PM, on my Dreamwidth, or via email ( megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com).

My little plot snippet has evolved into a monster, growing as it went and bowling me over in the process. All I could do was grab my keyboard and hang on. I hope you all enjoy the ride as much as I did, and wish you happy reading. Feedback is always appreciated, and my most sincere thank yous to everyone who has listened to me rant, shared their thoughts with me, and supported me throughout writing this!

~ Jezz-Ra

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Pride (In the Name of Love), Prologue

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites. My main archive & journal is located at jezzra. dreamwidth. com. All new works and information posted there first, and you can subscribe!

Also archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org, archiveofourown. org/ users /JezzRa

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

_Blah_ indicates thoughts.

A/N - Guess I don't need much of an author's note after the foreword I wrote. Enjoy the prologue. =D Story born on March 21st, 2009.

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"Master Inuyasha..." a small voice said somberly. Inuyasha blinked, his ears flicking forward, pausing with his dinner still in his teeth.

"What?" the hanyou managed, not bothering to remove the meat from his jaws, instead completing the motion of tearing off a more manageable bite. Mid-chew, he paused and squinted, eyes focusing on the flea demon standing before him. "Hrff..." he began, then paused to swallow before squinting at Myouga suspiciously. "Hey! I don't think I've ever seen you just...walk up to me. Finally tired of getting squashed?"

"This is no time for games, Master Inuyasha," Myouga responded stiffly, his tone and expression grave.

"What's going on, Myouga?" Miroku asked, peering at the flea curiously.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Four years had passed since they had finally gathered the last of the Shikon no Tama and defeated Naraku. After the battle, things had been strange for the little group. Without their great quest looming before them, the focus that had driven them forth with common purpose had disappeared.

Inuyasha had been increasingly restless. The topic of his relationship with Kagome had finally come up and been had out. They both agreed, on friendly enough terms, that it probably was for the best if they didn't pursue their relationship. Neither of them knew how it might affect things if Inuyasha were to move to her time to stay with her, and she wasn't inclined to stay with him.

Kagome had started going back to her own time more and more, for longer periods of time, until one day she announced she wasn't planning on returning. She had gotten her life back home jump-started and had some new friends, even a boyfriend, and intended to stay. The parting was tearful - after all, they had been good friends and through so much - but eventually they saw the last of her.

Sango had left the group and went back to her village to help with the construction and to safeguard against future demon assaults. It had been a difficult decision for her, but ultimately she felt she could do more good there than elsewhere. Miroku had initially gone with her.

Miroku, surprisingly, had returned and elected to stay with Inuyasha. Inuyasha was curious as to the whole story, but figured Miroku would tell it in his own good time. The two of them had made a little team dedicated to purging evil spirits, killing renegade youkai, and generally aiding and assisting the various villages their random wanderings took them to. They were beginning to get something of a reputation. They never charged for their work, but often were granted gifts for their service which they graciously accepted.

Shippo also stayed with Miroku and Inuyasha. Inuyasha treated him as he would his own pup, after all. The little kitsune really wasn't much of an effective demon hunter, but the villagers loved to see him anyways. Putting on small shows for them had actually driven him to learn more of his natural abilities.

Throughout their years of public service and demon-hunting, however, the trio had not seen Myouga in longer than they could recall. And his atypical announcement of his presence - actually walking forward instead of sneaking a bite in on Inuyasha - left them uneasy.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Master Inuyasha, you...you need to come home."

"Eh? Home? What you talkin' bout?" Inuyasha said with a squint.

"To the Castle of the Western Lands. Your home."

Inuyasha snorted. "Right. I'm sure my brother will welcome me with open arms."

Myouga was silent for a long time, bowing his head. Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he scowled at his retainer.

"What's that look for?"

"Master Inuyasha...your brother, Lord Sesshoumaru...is presumed to be dead. You are the sole heir to the throne of the Western Lands."

Inuyasha and Miroku both gasped, shocked. Inuyasha's initial instinct was to cheer, but the urge died before it had even fully formed. Yes, his brother had been a complete asshole to him for longer than he cared to remember...but Sesshoumaru was still family. He was still his brother. His only brother. His only actual family. A surprising spike of sadness wedged itself into his heart.

Myouga continued, his voice soft. "Everyone that was in the castle is dead. Lord Sesshoumaru's body was not among them...nor was his ward, Rin's...but..." The flea paused, finding it difficult to continue. "There was so much blood...and his swords are still there, including the other fang of your father."

Inuyasha nodded once, his expression grim. His brother...his father's entire castle staff...even the annoying toad Jaken and Sesshoumaru's unexplainable but sweet little human ward, butchered.

"You must return, Master Inuyasha. You're the only one left in line for the throne. If you don't claim it...and soon...the entire Western Lands will be thrown into chaos and war...no demon would give up the chance to rule what your father built."

Inuyasha was about to answer when the wind shifted slightly. He smelled rain heading their way, but that wasn't what caught his attention. He smirked in smug self-satisfaction. "HAH! I knew that tricky bastard was too stubborn to die!"

Before the startled flea or Miroku could react, Inuyasha had leaped to his feet. With another sniff to confirm his suspicions, he darted off into the trees.

"Inuyasha!" Miroku yelled, hurrying to try and follow the hanyou. "What is it? What do you smell?"

The increasingly distant reply left both Miroku and Myouga shocked. "My brother!"


	2. Chapter 1

Pride (In the Name of Love) 1 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

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Inuyasha burst into a small clearing in the forest and sniffed again, then stopped dead. Yes, his brother's scent was still lingering heavily in the area, though it was a few hours old. However, it wasn't Sesshoumaru's scent that stopped the hanyou.

Laying in the clearing, curled up tightly in Sesshoumaru's mokomoko, was Rin. Sesshoumaru himself, however, was nowhere to be seen.

Inuyasha didn't move for a long time, just staring at the sight with disbelief. All his life he had never, ever seen Sesshoumaru parted from his strange furry pseudo-appendage. Inuyasha knew, further, that it was a valuable part of his elder brother, a manifestation of part of his true form that carried over into his humanoid one. With a sickening sense of dread, Inuyasha knew Myouga had to have been right. Sesshoumaru would never have left behind something so vital and willingly subject himself to the pain and weakness such a separation would bring.

Rin stirred, and it broke Inuyasha from his concentration. The mokomoko slithered more tightly around her waist, surprising the hanyou. // Is it attached to her now somehow? Or is my brother still controlling it? Its no wonder I smell him so strongly. But...wait. If he left Rin here, of all places...he wanted me to find her. He knew I would. And...if he left the mokomoko with her, he really must be dead...and further, he KNEW he was going to die. He left Rin in my care. Presumptuous bastard, just assumed I'd take on his human...keh. And he's right. //

Inuyasha slowly headed over and kneeled down next to the sleeping girl. "Hey...hey kid, wake up."

Rin blinked fuzzily and slowly opened her eyes. "Lord Se--...Inuyasha?" she asked, sitting up. She gave the mokomoko a happy hug before looking around with a start, her eyes flying wide as she realized it was not attached to a certain taiyoukai. She gasped, shaking her head in denial. Inuyasha could almost hear the wheels turning inside the girl's mind and barely had a chance to brace himself before she had thrown herself at him. Her normally sunny demeanor had shattered into heartbroken tears.

Inuyasha winced - it always made him feel terrible when girls cried. It was even more distressing than usual with Rin - he had never seen the girl with an expression more serious than innocent curiosity. However, the strength of her reaction told him that the girl knew something he himself did not. Hesitantly, he held her and stroked her hair. "Rin...what...what happened? "

It was a while before the hysterical girl was able to gather her wits about herself and haltingly relay her story. Miroku entered just before she began.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Life had been proceeding as normal in the castle. Sesshoumaru was out on a brief patrol of his lands. Rin was trying, truly trying, to make sense of the convoluted history lesson that Jaken-sama was relaying, but she had so many questions! She knew that her Lord Sesshoumaru would want her to know this - after all, he had insisted on making sure she had a good education - but it was so hard to understand. And every time she asked the kappa anything, it distracted him from the topic and left both of them flustered.

Rin was about to interrupt him again when a horrifically loud noise echoed down the hallway. Sharp screams of pain and yells of rage and terror followed a moment later. Rin's eyes were wide in horror as she shrank back further into the room. Jaken forgot all of his ire at the girl's failing lesson and snatched up his staff, hurrying towards the door and locking it tightly. "Rin, whatever happens, stay behind me," he said abruptly. Rin managed a small nod.

The door was torn off its hinges a moment later and...something....big and shapeless and black rolled and oozed into the room. Jaken slammed the heel of his staff into the floor and unleashed a gout of flame at the monstrosity.

A massive limb shot out of the shapeless mass, slapping down on top of the staff. The staff was reduced to splinters, the might of its explosion muffled under the blob's fleshy substance. Rin didn't even have time to scream before another appendage shot out, catching Jaken across the waist. The kappa was flung to smack against the wall with near-splattering force. He was dead before he ever hit, however - claws on the beast's limb had nearly torn him in half.

Rin did scream then, a scream of the sheerest terror. She hadn't even managed to finish it before another set of limbs darted out. One grabbed her around the neck with crushing, breaking force as the other grew claws and gouged open her belly with a wild spray of blood. Rin was then discarded against the wall. She saw the terrible fiend vanish as the light dimmed from her eyes and she died.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The next thing Rin knew, she was lying on the floor against the wall. Her body ached, but the pain was receding. The midsection of her kimono hung in ragged bloody tatters, but she herself was fine. Sesshoumaru was kneeling next to her, his expression tight and drawn. It took her a couple of attempts to speak as she sat up, her gaze attempting to peer past Sesshoumaru. "Lord Sesshoumaru...?"

"Do not look, Rin. Close your eyes and do not open them until I say." The girl obeyed immediately. She felt Sesshoumaru's arms hook under her and lift her.

It took all of Rin's restraint to not let her eyes snap open as she gasped in sheer shock. "Lord Sesshoumaru!!" Sesshoumaru paused in his rapid departure of the room.

"What, Rin?"

"Your arm!! You...you only had one last time I saw you and... and this one doesn't look like the other ones you borrowed, its all stripey and matches your real one! Is it real too?!"

"Yes, Rin." Sesshoumaru's voice was clipped and tight, and Rin knew him well enough to understand that that tone meant he was very unhappy.

// He must be unhappy about the monster...I'm so glad he has his real arm back, though. I'm sure he looks even more wonderful now!...Hmm...I wonder where we're going? // Her thoughts became her words a moment later, as they always seemed to do of their own accord. "Where are we going, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

"It is not safe for you here, so I will bring you somewhere it is. Sleep, Rin. I will wake you when we arrive."

Rin nodded, her eyes still tightly closed. "Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama." With a contented half-smile, she snuggled up against his chest. She found she was more exhausted than she had even realized, and it did not take long for her to slip into a deep slumber.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Rin."

The girl blinked open her eyes and stretched a bit, before emitting a little gasp and hurriedly clamping her hands over her face. "Oh no! I'm sorry, Lord Sesshoumaru, you didn't say I could look..."

"..." There was a long pause from Sesshoumaru. "You may open your eyes, Rin."

The girl did, smiling as she looked around the pretty clearing in the forest. She had been sleeping, curled up next to Sesshoumaru. Apparently he must have rested a while as well, for he was half-laying, half-sitting against a tree, his mokomoko coiled around her to provide her some comfort and warmth while she rested. Rin smiled and contentedly and reverently pet mokomoko-sama, not noticing that the act caused Sesshoumaru's breath to catch minutely in his throat.

"Rin."

"Yes, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru looked at her for a long moment, his face unreadable but his golden eyes intense. The girl was entirely thrown off guard by what he said next. "The last time we were in this clearing was five years ago. You were only eight summers old and had just become my ward. We made camp here and you informed Jaken that you would wed me one day."

Rin blinked and then blushed brightly, immediately becoming extremely interested in fiddling with some of the loose bits of her kimono. She noticed belatedly that she was wearing Sesshoumaru's haori - she really hadn't gotten a good look at him due to most of her vision being obscured by the fluff of his mokomoko and the dark. He was naked from the waist up. She could clearly see his face, though...and the brilliant golden gleam of his eyes and the shimmering moonlit stretch of his hair. The night truly suited her Lord.

Sesshoumaru was silent for a while, and then asked a quiet question. "Did you even understand the implication of what you had said?"

Rin's blush darkened but she was forced to shake her head. "N-no...Lord Sesshoumaru. I do now, though." Hesitantly she met his gaze and offered him a small smile. Her smile fell abruptly at his next words.

"You cannot be mated to this Sesshoumaru."

Rin's gaze dropped, a strange little lump forming in her chest. Before she could sink too deeply into sorrow, however, Sesshoumaru had sat up, his fingers hooking under her chin and lifting her gaze to meet his own.

"You are too young. You have not even had your first heat yet, although it is likely to be soon. You are still a child by the laws of your species."

Rin gave him a tiny nod, although the motion was difficult because he hadn't released her chin just yet.

Sesshoumaru stared intently at her, and she found herself growing a bit unnerved under the power of his gaze.

"If you were older, this Sesshoumaru would take you for his own."

The quiet admission absolutely floored the girl and she gaped at her Lord and Master. Her heart fluttered in her chest like a wounded bird, and her disbelief was almost tangible. A sudden flood of warm, fuzzy warmth flooded through her and she felt like she was flying as the full impact of Sesshoumaru's words sank in. Feeling she had to say something or burst, she said the first thing that came to mind. "I have always belonged to you, Lord Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru's arms snapped around her waist and pulled her close before she could react. His lips brushed tenderly against her forehead. Rin's fingers unconsciously tightened into Sesshoumaru's silken hair, and the taiyoukai made no effort to stop her. His clawed fingers gently tipped her head to the side and he pressed his lips against her neck. A delightful shiver screamed through Rin's body. A moment later, however, she let out a startled yelp of pain as Sesshoumaru bit her, hard. His long canines sank deeply into her flesh.

Hearing her yelp, Sesshoumaru released her from his teeth, licking apologetically at the wound for a moment. His arms slowly slackened and he sat up straighter. Rin's hand immediately abandoned his hair and clamped over the bleeding wound, her eyes huge. "You....Lord Sesshoumaru, why did you bite Rin?...Did Rin do something wrong?"

"No, Rin. You are marked as mine. The bite will scar, and all that see it will know that you are claimed by an inuyoukai. It may not signify much to humans, but many other demons will steer clear of you if I cannot be there anymore to protect you. Besides the protection offers...it...pleases me."

Suddenly, the bite-mark took on a whole new light in Rin's mind. It transformed from a sharp stabbing pain intended to punish her to one of the most glorious gifts she had ever received. Now the whole world would know she belonged to Sesshoumaru! And further, it PLEASED him...she pleased him just by being his. She had never felt so warm and giddy in all her life. But wait....

"Why wouldn't you be there anymore to protect me?" Rin asked, her eyes flying to his in a panic. Sesshoumaru did not immediately answer.

"Go to sleep, Rin."

Rin frowned inwardly, but it wouldn't do to disobey her Lord. Especially since he had given her such a wonderful gift. She lay back down, a smile stealing across her face as she felt the warm, furry coils of his mokomoko wrap around her. // He's never done that before...he lets me touch it, but never wraps it around me...//

Rin was soon asleep, and would remain that way until Inuyasha stumbled upon her in the morning.


	3. Chapter 2

Pride (In the Name of Love) 2 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was dark...darker than any natural blackness. It was cold and damp, too. Dull amber eyes slowly flickered open as he struggled to keep his head from lolling forward again. He made a valiant effort to take stock of the situation, but the effort was too great. Sesshoumaru's head dropped bonelessly forward again, his chin hitting his bare chest. Dirty, blood-soaked tangles of tarnished silver hair snaked down his bruised and lacerated torso. His wounds were healing more slowly this time - his regenerative powers were severely overtaxed, and some of the cuts had scraped him to the bone.

He shifted, the chains around his chafed and swollen wrists drawing fresh blood. Another disorienting wave of nausea gripped him and threatened to make him retch. He was able to choke it back this time, although barely. He felt weak and drained, far beyond what his injuries should have brought him to. // Mokomoko-sama... //

Still, Sesshoumaru could not bring himself to regret leaving his mokomoko with Rin. As ill as the effects of being separated from it may be, he could only imagine the anguish he would be in now if that beast had his claws in it.

A low, rumbling laugh echoed through the room, reverberating through the wet stone beneath his feet, through the wall, through the air itself. Sesshoumaru made a concerted effort to pull himself fully conscious - to stiffen his spine, school his expression, pull the tatters of his dignity and his pride around him like a shield.

A pair of malevolent, dark red eyes slowly opened across the room, signaling the arrival of the beast. Below them, a hideous maw full of countless teeth - row upon row like a shark's except longer, narrower, curved and yellowed - gaped open in a gruesome parody of a smile. The rasping voice spoke, each word seeming to grate along the length of Sesshoumaru's spine, to jangle discordantly in his ears. "Good evening, little Lord. I trust your accommodations are acceptable?"

Sesshoumaru did not deign to dignify the taunt with a response, keeping his expression calm and level. It took every ounce of strength he had - his body wanted nothing more than to collapse back into the blissful blackness of unconsciousness.

The too-wide, too-toothy smile turned into a snarl and a hand shot forward. The hand was massive, scaly and black, tipped with dark and grimy claws. The powerful reptilian fingers wrapped entirely around the graceful line of Sesshoumaru's throat. "So, the little pup still has some fire in him..no worry, I know how to smother it." A black, oozing tongue slid out of the fetid mouth to trail up the taiyoukai's face. The reek of rotting flesh and the sickly sweet smell of death on the youkai's breath was almost enough to knock the beleagured Sesshoumaru out. As it was, he was unable to suppress a shudder of horrified disgust at the contact. "Just remember, puppy...you belong to me now, through your own doing..."

Unbidden, Sesshoumaru thought back to the events that had brought him to this point.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A high pitched scream tore through the air. Sesshoumaru's heart froze even as a violent snarl twisted his usually impassive features. // Rin! //

Sesshoumaru tore into his castle, heedless of anything that dared get into his way. If it didn't move quickly enough, be it door or obstacle, he simply smashed through it. In the back of his mind he took note of the castle's eerie stillness. Crumpled about on the ground like discarded scraps of paper lay his servants and his guard. The smell of blood, human and youkai alike, was heavy and cloying in the air.

The taiyoukai burst into Rin's room a moment later, golden eyes darting about wildly. He almost tripped on something as he entered the room and he spared it a quick glance. It was Jaken's body, torn nearly in half. His staff lay scorched and splintered a few feet away.

The toad demon was forgotten, however, when Sesshoumaru's gaze finally fell on Rin's body. The girl lay in a heap in the corner of the room, her stomach torn wide open. Her eyes were glazed over in death.

Something twanged painfully inside Sesshoumaru's soul. He cast about wildly, but his sensitive nose couldn't find a trace of whoever had killed his ward. The heavy feeling in the air, the sense of horribly powerful youki, thrummed against his senses with a pressure like noiseless thunder.

// No. This Sesshoumaru will NOT allow this! // he growled to himself, snatching Tenseiga from its sheath. Dimly something whispered dark things into the back of his mind, telling him that it wouldn't work. He had revived Rin once this way before.

Heedless of the nagging voice, Sesshoumaru slashed the blade in a vicious arc before him. He stumbled backwards in pure shock a moment later as his vision and the room itself seemed to waver. Normally Tensaiga would show him the little demons that worked busily to prepare a soul for its departure from the world of the living.

This...this was horrific and different. The entire room seemed to darken to a shadow of its former self. The walls , floor, and ceiling had become indistinct, cloudy and vague. But the room was the least of Sesshoumaru's concerns. Crouched on the ground before him was a hulking, massive demon beast.

The demon's form was indistinct. amorphous and shifting. A pair of smoky red eyes gleamed in the mass of dark flesh. Off to one side a muscled, tentacle-arm was extended. The clawed hand was curled around the neck of Rin's soul, holding her high off the ground. Her eyes were blank, uncomprehending.

A low, echoing chuckle reverberated through the room, though it seemed to speak to Sesshoumaru's mind as much as it boomed in his sensitive ears. "Ah, so the mighty Inu no Taisho's little pup finally arrives."

Sesshoumaru eyed the beast impassively, showing no trace of the turbulent emotions roiling beneath the surface of his glacial stare. "What is it that brings you to this Sesshoumaru's castle?" Sesshoumaru's tone was level, but it was heavy with the threat of pain and death.

"Just like your father," the grating voice rumbled. "So much talking and false niceties."

"You have slain my ward, my guard, my retainer, and my servants?" Sesshoumaru snapped, his eyes narrowing.

"I have."

"Generally, threats work better if you have not already carried out the act you care to threaten with," Sesshoumaru quipped, eyes unconsciously locking on Rin's lifeless soul as it dangled in the demon's grip.

"I have not made threats yet, puppy."

"This Sesshoumaru has not been a puppy for nearly seven hundred years. I am Lord of these lands, and if you do not quit attempting to toy with me..."

"SILENCE!" the demon suddenly roared. The very walls shook from the force of the youkai's voice. "I am here to collect on a debt owed me from your father before you, and I care nothing for your lands! I do not desire them."

"You will release this Sesshoumaru's ward."

"If you agree to my terms. I shall not be denied a second time...puppy."

Sesshoumaru's teeth clenched tightly. He was angry at the knot of fear and worry for Rin that tugged at his heart. "Explain."

"I am Tsetsukosei, Lord of the Black Circle."

"Black Circle," Sesshoumaru stated as much as questioned.

Tsetsukosei again let out his dry, malevolent chuckle. "It is a power far beyond your ken, foolish pup. The Black Circle is as the yawning maw of Hell itself, the outermost ring. I had...dealings...with your father. But he would not accept the price of my truce, refused to make repayment for what he had taken from me."

"And what was this...price?"

A horrible, vaguely reptilian face stretched out of the blob. The fleshy mass slowly constricted and contorted until it roughly resembled the form of a hideous bipedal dragon. A terrible grin stretched across the gaping maw, revealing row upon row of teeth, layered something like a shark's but much longer and curved. "I demanded he hand over his precious puppy...you have always been such a pretty thing."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened slightly, but he controlled himself quickly, only letting his disgust at the concept show. "Apparently, my Lord Father did not see fit to agree to your terms," he responded smoothly.

"No!" Tsetsukosei roared, angered. "But now I have come back. The father is gone, and all that is left is his pretty little puppy. You are strong for your age, but you are a candle in the face of the sun compared to your father! I have come to collect on my debt."

"My father's personal debts are not my own. There is no proof of your alleged dealings."

The vaguely draconic face twisted into a gruesome glare. "I will deal with you, then. A willing victim is much more enjoyable than not. You will lay down your weapons and come with me as my prisoner. In return, I will allow your human-child to return to live out the rest of her short, miserable human days. If you do not agree to these terms, the anguish this soul will experience will be legend."

Sesshoumaru glared darkly at the demon before him, surprised to not only find himself considering it but already accepting the offer. // So I simply must agree to his terms until I find a way to escape. To trade this Sesshoumaru for the life of a human girl...forgive me my judgment of you in days gone by, my Lord Father. I understand now. // "We have an accord. Under condition."

Tsetsukosei's malevolent red eyes narrowed and he gave Rin's motionless spirit a shake for good measure. "What...condition?" he growled at Sesshoumaru.

"You will return her to life. You will remain here, out of her sight. I will take this girl elsewhere, so I know she will be cared for and not stranded in a hostile land without me. You will not have dealings with the girl again, in this life or the next. I will return by dawn to hold up my end of the bargain."

The massive youkai growled and gnashed his million teeth before grating out his response. "As you will, puppy. When you return, you will be mine."

"And my lands?" Sesshoumaru truly had a hard time accepting that this assault was more personal than an attempt to take over some part of his father's hard-earned territory.

"I care not what happens to them. They can rot or be the start of a war. It does not matter. Where you will accompany me, this will seem like little more than a faded dream. Of course....should you behave well...I can reward you."

Sesshoumaru didn't like the sick grin that spread on the demon's face, although he lost interest in the grin as a burning pain shot through his chest and into the severed stump of his arm. His flesh seemed to crawl painfully, stretching and twisting before splitting open forcefully with a spray of tattered flesh and blood. Sesshoumaru barely managed to keep the shock from his face as he realized that his arm was once again whole. It was no construct, but really and truly his own flesh, complete with markings. He turned a withering glare on Tsetsukosei. "This Sesshoumaru wants no part of your bribery."

Tsetsukosei hissed darkly. "Go. You have few hours before the dawn!"

Sesshoumaru found himself back in the castle, the dark void vanishing along with the horrible youkai. He looked down at Rin's body. Even as he watched, her injuries closed and her eyelids fluttered open. "Rin..."

As the girl sat up, he quickly told her to shut her eyes before carrying her swiftly from the castle. He did not want her to see Jaken's torn corpse or the others that littered his hallway as he brought her outside. When he finally had the girl asleep in his arms, he set off at a rapid pace, heading for his brother's camp. He did not know where else to go - Sesshoumaru had few allies and no true friends to rely on. Despite their conflicts, he knew his hanyou brother would not abandon a helpless human female in the woods to fend for herself, not even his ward.

He moved swiftly, finding it ironic that his brother's travels had taken him to the very forest in which he had first met Rin - indeed, the same clearing in which they had spent one of their first nights with her in his care. He could smell his brother nearby and knew he was downwind. The wind would change by morning, he knew, to blow in a mild rain shower that was still forming. His brother would have no choice but to notice the girl's scent...and his own. His curiosity would draw him and his altruism would keep him. Perfect.

Sesshoumaru laid Rin down carefully in the grass at the base of a large tree. A tiny frown flitted across his elegant features as he saw her shiver. He removed his haori and used his mokomoko to carefully lift the girl. After securing her in said haori, he settled her back down, but left mokomoko to help keep her warm. He settled down next to her and simply watched her sleep.

In his mind, Sesshoumaru was replaying his life since Rin had become a part of it. He had never been able to understand how any one creature...especially something so fragile, powerless, and short-lived as a human...could be so incessantly loving and cheerful ALL THE TIME. And yet here she was. Her devotion to and worship of him was beyond question.

He knew, too, that the girl had come to love him. Even if he hadn't been able to smell the way she reacted to his presence, Rin always wore her heart on her sleeve. Her eyes spoke volumes to anyone that cared to look.

Sesshoumaru had looked far more than she knew. He found himself loathe to even attempt to live without the bright spark, the shooting star that was Rin, in his life. He understood now, as he had not in his younger days, how a taiyoukai could end up with a human. He had berated his father, judged him harshly...but he had not understood. He remembered the Inu no Taisho telling him as much.

Rin was still too young, of course - she had just entered her thirteenth summer. She hadn't had her first heat - Sesshoumaru definitely would have known. She was still a child and had more growing to do before she would make him a fitting mate and could bear him pups.

A fleeting pang of regret intruded on him. He found himself wishing he would have the chance, when she was older, to take her as his own...but such was not to be. Unless, of course, he found a quick way to escape from his bondage to Tsetsukosei. However, that was unlikely. It was much more likely the demon would torture him, probably even kill him.

A small, possessive growl echoed from his throat. If he could not have Rin, at least he would let the world know he had intended it. And his mark would give many demons pause and food for thought - the prominent mark of an inuyoukai would deter many.

His mind made up, he woke the girl. He hesitated, trying to find a way to broach the subject, and he hoped she understood all he had tried to say. A pang went through him when she first thought his bite, his mark, was a punishment, and he explained its role in protection...and even went so far as to admit it pleased him to see her carrying so obvious a flag of his possession.

A while later she was asleep again. He coiled his mokomoko around her gently, lovingly. She unconsciously hugged the furry length and he closed his eyes, reveling in the joy the snuggle brought him. It felt wonderful. // And so, too, could this be used to cause me the worst of pains... //

The thought set him back, and Sesshoumaru frowned deeply. He knew that Tsetsukosei was going to be neither nice nor gentle, and would use everything he had to attempt to bring him pain. The loss of his mokomoko...so much of his youkai, a part of his body itself!...would hurt. But it would not hurt as much as having it used against him.

Sesshoumaru wondered briefly if it could survive if it attached itself to Rin. Surely, the girl would not have the ability to mold its energy and make it an extension of her will, but perhaps...it would live. He liked that thought, that a part of him would live on even if the rest of him perished. Standing and steeling himself, he grasped the mokomoko in his hands. With one brutal motion, he tore it free of his body.

The shock, the pain, and the nausea brought him retching to his knees. Dark spots intruded on the corners of his vision. Mokomoko writhed like a skewered snake, oozing blood. Sesshoumaru panted, fangs bared, claws digging into the trunk of the tree before him as he looked. He watched out of the corner of his eye as his mokomoko coiled tightly around Rin.

Sesshoumaru sank down and sat against the tree, not moving until the sky began to lighten just above the horizon. It was time for him to go, and so he did. He did not look back as he left his most priceless of possessions and returned to his castle.

He slowly forced himself to take a knee before the terrible beast that was Tsetsukosei. With a gleeful, roaring howl the demon snatched him up. The world faded to black around Sesshoumaru as he lost consciousness.

When he woke, it would be to find himself chained to a wall. The vaguely draconic demon took great delight in rending his flesh, quickly or slowly, with whip and tail and claw. He was beaten, then left to heal, and beaten some more.

Now, Tsetsukosei once again stood before him, and the horrible fiend's intentions were obviously anything but pure.


	4. Chapter 3

Pride (In the Name of Love) 3 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Rin had been both hopeful and reluctant to go back to the castle. She had flat out refused to enter, much to Inuyasha's bafflement, and informed him that her Lord had not wished her to see something in there. Until Inuyasha figured out what that was, she would not enter.

Inuyasha had no difficulties locating what his brother had been shielding her from - the place was the scene of a massacre. Bodies, blood, tatters of flesh and shredded organs littered the halls. Whatever had come through here was disgustingly powerful, and Inuyasha wanted no part of it.

A bit of sniffing and he was able to locate the chambers his brother had frequented the most. A deep frown creased his features when he found Jaken's torn body - he hadn't ever really liked the toad, but that didn't mean he REALLY wanted to see him dead.

The frown deepened as a lump grew in his throat, his gaze riveted on the other end of the room. Both of his brother's swords, Toukijin and Tenseiga, lay discarded in a pool of blood. Rin's blood, by the smell of it. The reality of Sesshoumaru's death seemed to sink in further as he eyed the weapons.

Inuyasha tried to tell himself he didn't care, and was in fact glad that the pretentious, supercilious bastard was dead. All the pain and grief he had suffered at Sesshoumaru's hands... And yet...and yet. He couldn't bring himself to hate his brother. He knew, in the depths of his heart, that if Sesshoumaru had ever truly wanted to kill him he would not be alive right now. Just because he believed his brother didn't want him dead, however, didn't mean he forgave him for all the pain he'd been caused by his actions or inactions.

"Confusing bastard, you have me tied in knots and you aren't even alive. You probably planned this," Inuyasha grumped before picking up Tenseiga. He carefully cleaned the blade before sticking it in his belt. He gave Toukijin a sidelong glance before yanking down a curtain and using it to gingerly scoop up the evil blade. He didn't want to touch it - he didn't trust it.

With a dejected sigh, he made his way back outside to where Miroku, Rin, and Shippo were waiting. "We'll be camping out here in the courtyard. Miroku...I'm...come with me. Rin, stay here with Shippo for a while."

Rin nodded, her voice small and somewhat dejected. "Yes, Inuyasha-sama."

Miroku followed Inuyasha inside and almost immediately gasped, murmuring a soft prayer under his breath.

"Yeah, I know," Inuyasha said in response. "We have to bury all these people. It's not right to just leave 'em here. And then we have to clean up all the mess. It shouldn't be too hard to get the blood off the marble, but most of the rugs'll probably have to go."

"Inuyasha...do you know how long this is going to take just the two of us?" At Inuyasha's dark look, Miroku hastily clarified. "Of course we have to take care of all these people, but...we need help. They'll be dust and we'll drop into our own graves from exhaustion before we're half finished."

"And just who, exactly, are we supposed to get to help us, monk? It's not like I know a ton of people."

"You're the new lord, Inuyasha...and as such, you'll need a new staff and new guard. So...you need to make an official statement You have to regardless - if word spreads too fast about Sesshoumaru's untimely demise, you'll be embroiled in a nasty war very quickly."

Inuyasha paused and then nodded, conceding the point.

"And your first task for your new staff will be to get this place cleaned up and have the dead laid properly to rest."

"You make it sound so easy."

"Well..." Miroku shrugged and offered his friend a small smile. "It IS a simple theory. But the sooner you publically stake your claim on your father's lands, the better."

"Ok....but....where the hell do I go to make this announcement? Who do I tell?"

"I'm sure your brother had an office around here somewhere, it'd have all the important information and contact lists for other....high-ranking sorts. I suppose you can just invite them all to the courtyard here and the word will spread through them."

"Good idea, monk. Guess you have your uses after all."

Miroku sighed and gave his friend an affectionate grin. "You're too kind, Inuyasha..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Pain...all the world was pain. Throbbing, dull, aching pain.

Sesshoumaru fought to clear his mind, but was finding his lucid moments to be further and further apart. And it seemed every time he came to, Tsetsukosei would reappear to put him right back under.

At this point, death would be welcome.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes ruefully. // Never before have I so grossly underestimated an opponent... or perhaps overestimated myself. Mayhap it was a bit of both. //

Something was off...something had changed. Sesshoumaru blearily looked about until he realized with a start that he was laying on the floor, no longer hanging from his wrists on the wall. In fact, neither his wrist nor his ankles remained chained.

He sat up swiftly and heard the rattle of a chain, a weight on his neck. His hands flew to his throat and clutched at the metal band they found there, his face suddenly burning with anger and shame. // He would dare to put a COLLAR on this Sesshoumaru?! //

"Chained like the dog you are, puppy..." came that horrible voice that raked against all his nerves the wrong way. Sesshoumaru whipped his gaze around, his sunfire-golden eyes blazing with hatred and renewed fury. "Oh...this seems to have struck a chord. The little alpha puppy does not like being bound at the throat, is that it?"

Sesshoumaru remained silent, though his lips twitched, trying to form an involuntary snarl. His claws dug into his palms deeply enough to draw blood. He climbed to his feet and turned his back to Tsetsukosei after giving him a truly frigid glare.

There was a scraping, rustling noise as the youkai drew himself forward. When he was within striking range, Sesshoumaru whirled with a vicious growl, his claws dripping with venom as he slashed at his tormenter. A new series of pains shot through the battered taiyoukai as his claws failed to penetrate - indeed, a couple snapped on the solid, armored plates of Tsetsukosei's chest...and the horrid screeching the rest caused sent sharp spikes of anguish into his sensitive ears.

Sesshoumaru fell back, looking at the snapped middle claws of his hand as if he had been cruelly betrayed. Tsetsukosei's burst of raucous laughter did little to make him feel better. His wrists were suddenly seized in an iron grip as the reptilian monster lunged, slamming him back against the wall almost hard enough to crack his spine.

"Foolish, insolent cur...you would do well to simply learn your place instead of fighting me. Your life would be so much simpler. Ask my forgiveness and acknowledge me as your Master and I shall spare you punishment."

Sesshoumaru was not given to crude, base language, nor did he make a habit of speaking in anything less than was befitting of his station. However, there was only one thing the taiyoukai could say to that.

"Fuck you."

Tsetsukosei chuckled wickedly, amused to hear Sesshoumaru's cultured, dignified purr uttering something so harsh and classless. "You will live to regret those words. Or not. It does not matter to me. Death would not be an escape for you."

Sesshoumaru hadn't considered that. He silently cursed himself. Of course this wretched fiend had some power over death as well - his threat on Rin's soul was what got him into this mess in the first place! There seemed to have been much, in fact, he had failed to take into consideration. It was unlike him to be so...careless. // And yet, when I saw him with my Rin like that...I did not care of the consequences. Oh, this Sesshoumaru is a fool...my Lord Father, forgive your son for failing so... perhaps my hanyou brother will be better suited as your heir than I. //

A involuntary, surprised snarl ripped itself free of Sesshoumaru as Tsetsukosei grabbed his attention by rather roughly grabbing him between the legs. The beast snickered in cruel amusement as he continued to squeeze and fondle him. "You are such a pretty thing, puppy..."

Sesshoumaru's voice was barely intelligible over the angry snarl that accompanied it. "Get your filthy hands OFF of me!" The taiyoukai's eyes had flared to crimson, but for some reason he could not make the instinctive change his body screamed at him to make...to take on his true form and show this...this thing!...what a dire mistake he had made.

"I think not. In fact, I intend to keep you as my mate. Perhaps more a plaything...'mate' implies you have some say in the matter."

Sesshoumaru snapped. His prized control vaporized. He had, quite simply, Had Enough. "RELEASE ME NOW OR SUFFER!" he roared, baring his teeth and actually snapping at Tsetsukosei. His youki surged within him and his back arched sharply, almost powerfully enough to throw the monster off of him. Tsetsukosei blinked before bursting into laughter. Sesshoumaru's burst of rage cooled quickly as his exhaustion surged forward. Golden eyes slid shut and his head fell forward, his chest heaving as he panted, suddenly feeling so tired...

Tsetsukosei dug a clawed hand into his hip, the cruel talons sinking in several inches. Sesshoumaru's eyes instantly snapped back open. "Now now, none of that. I have a much better use for you." When Sesshoumaru did not respond past a baleful glare, the youkai continued. "Get on your knees and beg me to allow me to let you pleasure me."

Sesshoumaru DID almost fall to his knees, but it was assuredly not out of the slightest inkling to acquiesce to the fiend's request. For the second time, he acted a commoner. "Fuck...you."

Tsetsukosei growled before leaning forward, his weight crushing Sesshoumaru against the wall. The taiyoukai felt the strain on his breastbone and heard the sound of ribs cracking under the pressure. "No? Well, then, I suppose I'll just have to pleasure myself, then."

The taiyoukai wondered dimly why he would possibly care at ALL if Tsetsukosei decided to do something of the sort because he refused to take to his knees and service him.

A moment later it all made shocking, horrible sense. Tsetsukosei backed off of him and released his grip on Sesshoumaru's wrist, only to grab him by the collar and hurl him viciously to the floor. The taiyoukai hit with an impact that blasted the breath from his lungs and made him see stars where his head cracked sharply off the stone floor. The pain was pushed back as a clarion call of clarity shone into his mind, flown in on the wings of something that could only be described as panic.

The beast intended to mount him.

A fresh surge of energy shot through Sesshoumaru as he tensed, claws scrabbling for purchase as he hastily attempted to right himself. He never had a chance, however. Tsetsukosei was too horribly fast and too strong. A heavy taloned hand slammed against his spine near his shoulderblades, slapping him back down with enough force to crack the fine bone structure of his cheek.

"Perhaps you will learn to accept the kindnesses I offer you in light of the results if you do not, puppy," Tsetsukosei hissed. Sesshoumaru squirmed, ignoring the pain of his body as he tried to do anything he could to get away from the sharp claws of the dragon's other hand raking down his back. In response, the youkai gouged his claws into Sesshoumaru's hip to the bone, holding him immobile. His arms were pinned uselessly beneath him, the pressure on his shoulders rendering them incapable of movement.

He heard Tsetsukosei's hated laughter and heavy breathing as something prodded against him from behind. His mind reeled in a sickening spiral of denial.

Tsetsukosei grinned ferally as he snapped his hips forward, burying his massive erection to the hilt inside of Sesshoumaru. The normally stoic, frigid taiyoukai...who had not made so much as a grunt through all of his beatings and torture thus far, let out a high-pitched howl of anguish.

Sesshoumaru was vaguely aware of someone screaming, loudly, but did not realize it was himself. He was certain his entire body had just been torn in two, split at the seams. Things within him had been rent at the vicious invasion, and he smelled his own blood and the heavy, putrid scent of Tsetsukosei's arousal. Sharp tears stung the corners of his eyes and a low, keening whine ripped itself from the depths of his soul, increasing in pitch as the beast began to thrust into him fast and hard.

The taiyoukai lost all sense of time. Nothing in his world existed but this oppressive, rending pain. He was beyond caring that tortured gasps and cries escaped him, beyond caring that tears slid down his cheeks. He heard Tsetsukosei speak, some lewd comment or another, but the words made no sense to him. All that mattered was the pain, this endless pain.

Tsetsukosei growled in vicious delight, Sesshoumaru's unconscious noises of anguish serving only to spike his arousal. He had never had any creature, willing or not, that had brought him such a level of pleasure. Never had anything been so warm and tight and sweet, blood and warm flesh and that delicious whine from such a proud, elegant throat...

With a thunderous roar, the demon came abruptly, his seed exploding into the small, torn body beneath him. It burned horribly, but Sesshoumaru couldn't break free of the shock in his mind to so much as twitch, let alone react more purposefully.

Tsetsukosei grunted and tossed Sesshoumaru roughly against the wall with one hand as if he were no more than a soiled rag doll. The taiyoukai hit and fell to the floor, golden eyes wide and staring, but unfocused on anything as he lay where he was discarded. "Oh, surely the mighty Sesshoumaru is not so easily broken..." he chuckled, his voice heavy with sated lust. Sesshoumaru gave no reaction that he had heard.

The demon beast licked his lips with his thick black tongue as he eyed Sesshoumaru. He sensed he would get nothing further from his victim for now. With a chuckle, he turned and took a few steps before vanishing into the shadows at the far end of the cell.


	5. Chapter 4

Pride (In the Name of Love) 4 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Over the past couple weeks, things had gone surprisingly well for Inuyasha. He had made a bold, challenging speech to the assembled youkai dignitaries, and luckily for him it had been accepted. Even though he was hanyou and backed by a human monk, most of them had enough fear and respect for the Inu no Taisho and Sesshoumaru after him that the did not dare risk a fight.

So the meeting came and went. Several lesser demons pledged their fealty. Some of the more powerful lords took careful note of Inuyasha - there would be several challenges to his position in the future. However, things had gone better than they dared to hope.

After Inuyasha was unquestioningly established as the new Lord of the West, Miroku took on the job of advertising their need for servants and palace guard. This had been an issue that had bothered them both - they had assumed Sesshoumaru kept his staff by fear or force. However, while going through the very well organized and surprisingly detailed paperwork, they had found the payroll. Apparently, working in the Western Castle was not only a good-paying job but a prestigious one as well.

Miroku took over the paperwork almost entirely, since Inuyasha had no real education to speak of and wasn't even literate. Inuyasha was quite happy to do patrols and preside over necessary functions. The two of them were kept very busy, and both of them privately wondered how Sesshoumaru had run everything so efficiently and flawlessly by himself, let alone had time to do anything else.

Shippo was ecstatic about castle life. Inuyasha had slyly informed him he would need a competent personal guard, and the little kitsune had took to his training with a will, throwing himself into his education and getting private lessons from some of the castle's kitsune guards.

Everyone had renewed purpose and vigor in their life. Running the castle, protecting the lands, serving the people in this new way - it was everything they could have asked for. Everyone was happy.

Everyone but Rin.

Hardly anyone had seen the girl since they had come back to the castle. She had retreated to her room and stayed there, only coming out to eat or participate in her schooling. Sometimes, late at night, Inuyasha found her sitting outside the door to Sesshoumaru's room. She never opened the door and never went inside - she merely stayed and stared, hugging mokomoko tightly. Seeing the girl who he had always known to be personified sunshine and joy looking so haunted and depressed all the time tugged at the hanyou's heart. Eventually, he had to approach her.

"Rin?" Inuyasha asked softly, walking up next to her. The girl nodded slightly but didn't bother to look at him or move. Inuyasha sighed and crouched next to her. "I know you miss him. I don't know what all he was to ya, I've seen that scar on your neck. Hell...he spent as long as I can remember tryin' to kill me, and -"

"Lord Sesshoumaru never wanted to kill you or he could have. He went to see you lots of times that you never knew."

Inuyasha blinked. There had been several times he had thought he had caught the faintest trace of his brother's dry, spicy-sweet scent on an errant breeze, but he had often written it off as his imagination. But now, he suddenly wasn't so sure. And he knew Rin was right - much as he wanted to believe his brother was a wicked, cold-hearted bastard...evidence was flowing in that it simply was not the case. Sesshoumaru was faster, stronger, and stealthier. He'd had ample opportunity to kill him, but despite the injuries he'd received at his brother's hand, Inuyasha had never been fatally wounded.

And then there was the eye-opener of running the Western Castle. Sesshoumaru was generous in rewarding loyalty and fierce in protecting those that fell under his flag. Everyone said he was a hard ruler, but no one said he was unfair. He may have been cold and distant, but his people wanted for nothing.

"Look, Rin..." Inuyasha sighed heavily. "No matter if he was a bastard or if he wasn't, the fact of the matter is he's gone. He knew he was going to die and so he made sure you had his...his furry thing...and that I'd find you. And he left the swords too. I don't know what happened to him, but he's gone. Staring at his door and cryin' about it won't bring him back."

Rin's expression was fierce as she turned to Inuyasha. "Lord Sesshoumaru is alive."

"Kid, I know you want to believe that but it's impossible. Come on, this isn't healthy."

"It isn't impossible. He had to go away, but he'll come back."

Inuyasha was getting frustrated - he wasn't any good at this. "Rin, look, I'm sorry, but dead is dead! You don't just come back from that without help and there's no way he could use Tenseiga on himself."

"Lord Sesshoumaru is alive."

"Prove it," Inuyasha growled, giving up.

"Prove he's not," Rin countered. "Did you find a body? His blood? Anything?"

Inuyasha frowned uneasily. It was true, they'd found no physical evidence of his death. Sure, there was the swords and the whole thing with Rin, but...Sesshoumaru was normally a cautious individual. Leaving behind his most precious possessions just in case the worst happened or so they couldn't be used against him did sound very much like something the taiyoukai would do. But if that were the case...why hadn't he come back yet?

"Alright, look. I really don't know what I'm going to find or if I'll find anything at all. But if it'll make you feel better, I'll conduct an investigation."

Rin's eyes lit up and she beamed eagerly at Inuyasha. "Really?! Oh, thank you, Inuyasha-sama!"

Inuyasha let out a little 'oof' as the girl hurled herself at him, giving him a tight hug. "Hey, I'm not finished. Like I said, I'll do this investigation, and I'll let you know what I find, good or bad. But there's one condition."

"What is that?"

"That whatever I do find, you accept it. If it keeps looking like he's dead, you don't spend the rest of your days staring at his door in denial. I don't want you getting your hopes up, kid. Chances are we won't find anything good. It's been a while and he would have come back if he were able."

"Thank you, Lord Inuyasha. I agree. I'll help any way I can."

Inuyasha smiled and ruffled her hair. "Good. I'll see if I can find anyone that knows how to do this sort of thing..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru had lost all conception of time. The room he was in was always dark. There were no windows in his cell or anywhere nearby. All of eternity could have passed him by and he would be none the wiser - in fact, it felt like it had.

He guessed only a couple weeks had passed. In that time Tsetsukosei had fed him only twice. He had lost more weight than he should have. He had always been slender and graceful, but now he could easily count his ribs. He was almost entirely drained of energy - his body was starting to eat itself in an effort to have enough power to fuel his costly regenerative abilities. Things were slowly failing. Healing was taking longer and longer, and some of the deepest wounds were no longer closing up completely. Several would probably scar.

And to make matters even worse, in the department of scars...Tsetsukosei had closed that terrible maw around his throat and bit him deeply, marking him as his mate...marking him as claimed. Sesshoumaru knew that he'd live in shame of that mark for the rest of his days if he ever did escape. Him, an alpha, marked as someone's little bitch. Oh, there were some that would find that delightfully hilarious.

Tsetsukosei didn't bother to bring him water either, although this was less of a problem than food. The stone chamber he was in was very damp, and brackish water pooled in one low spot in the corner. If he stretched enough, he found he could reach the foul-tasting stuff. He forced himself to drink it on occasion, more to alleviate the pain in his raw throat than to quench his thirst.

His captor had simply gotten more brutal as time passed. He had taken to mounting Sesshoumaru frequently. The taiyoukai had fervently prayed each time that the pain would be less, somehow, or that he would grow more accustomed to it. But every time, his accursed body would have healed enough to provide fresh flesh and nerve endings to violate. The pain was always, always distinct and incomparable.

Sesshoumaru found himself cringing at the mere thought of the beast taking him again. Indeed, his mind had begun to betray him. He knew if he didn't fight it so much that things would be easier on him. If he submitted, everything would hurt less. There had been more than one occasion where the fiend had simply demanded a show of submission. Sesshoumaru had stalwartly refused, and had begun to wonder if his pride was really worth the price.

The truth was that he had begun to despair. No matter what he did, he was simply outclassed in every way. Perhaps he was more intelligent than the youkai, but every physical advantage was his captor's. Sesshoumaru was forced to admit he could not force his way out and was never given anything even remotely resembling an opening to trick his way out.

And if he could not escape on his own power...he would not be escaping at all. The only one in all the world that cared for him was Rin, and what could she do? He may have had the respect of many, but the love of none. No one, not even his brother, would ever wish to save him if he were in trouble. In fact, they'd be glad for it.

Even if he was wrong about no one caring enough to save him, he knew they all assumed he was dead regardless. No one would even think to make the attempt. Why would it ever cross their minds to rescue one whom they thought had died?

Sesshoumaru had to fight the very strong urge to cower, mentally slapping himself, when Tsetsukosei appeared. The beast never seemed to use the door, even though there was one. He would simply phase in and out like some sort of damned ghost.

Something was different this morning - the draconic, too-toothy mouth was leering in a different fashion than usual. Sesshoumaru was immediately on his guard, although he didn't bother wasting the energy to tense. He had already learned that both fight and flight was a wasted effort.

"Good morning, puppy. I am feeling generous this morning, and have decided to allow you more freedom. After all, I prefer you to be clean and pretty...which is not something you've been able to accomplish here. And if you prove you can earn it, I'll allow you regular food and water."

Sesshoumaru was nervous, uncertain. There was some trick, some catch here...he was sure of it. This beast had NO heart and did NOTHING out of generosity. The taiyoukai was pleased that he - more or less - was still able to keep his expression impassive despite it all. He still revealed nothing. // Of course, that's probably why he feels the need to keep increasing my tortures...to make sure he's getting through to me. // "..."

Tsetsukosei sighed. "So ungrateful. Not even a word of thanks. Ah, well. You will learn. Your training is early on and you are young yet. The only rule to your travels is that you are not allowed to leave the palace grounds. Do I make myself clear?"

Sesshoumaru scowled inwardly. // What manner of trick is this? The fool could not POSSIBLY be releasing me and assuming a simple threat would keep me on the premises... // Instead, he gave Tsetsukosei a wary nod. The beast reached over to the wall and gripped the thick chain that attached to Sesshoumaru's collar. The links melted into nothingness in his grasp. Holding it like a leash, he yanked Sesshoumaru to his feet and headed for the door. The taiyoukai struggled to make his body keep pace, the effort of moving so much and so suddenly being more than his battered body wanted to cope with.

He soon managed to recover, although the effort of holding his head up and keeping pace with the beast was immense. His face abruptly flamed as he realized the dark halls of this massive stone fortress were filled with demons. Shame and humiliation at being drug naked, dirty and mostly starved on a leash filled the taiyoukai, and it was all he could do to control the tremor that wanted to possess him.

A wave of cool air hit him abruptly as Tsetsukosei pushed open a massive door. He was led into a courtyard. The sky was gray and dim, but even that light after being in such darkness so long hurt Sesshoumaru's sensitive eyes. Dark, twisted plants grew in parodies of exquisite gardens. The tall fortress walls were manned, but the front gate was open. // I am outside... // Sesshoumaru thought wildly, his tongue flicking out to wet his lips even as an excited little thrill shot down his spine. Something akin to hope sparked in his mind.

Tsetsukosei reached up and detached the chain from his collar in much the same way he had taken it from the wall. "As I said. You are free to go where you wish on the grounds, though you will come to me whenever I please. You are not yet allowed to utilize the kitchens, but I will allow a bath. If you are well behaved, I will allow you food when you wish it."

Sesshoumaru twitched despite himself before looking at the hated fiend. "This Sesshoumaru can...move freely," he clarified warily.

"Yes, yes...move, caper, cavort, run, skip, hop, jump, walk, saunter, sashay...whatever mode of movement you prefer. You have been told your boundaries."

Sesshoumaru nodded once...and then broke into a dead run for the door. Tsetsukosei made no move to chase him. He knew there had to be a trick...there had to be a catch...but he couldn't bring himself to care. The prospect of freedom, so tantalizingly close, simply overwhelmed him. Surely the beast couldn't think Sesshoumaru feared him enough to stay his prisoner just on a threat...!

The moment he crossed the threshold, Sesshoumaru had his answer. A tremendous electric shock coursed through him from the collar around his neck, dropping him to the ground. His teeth clacked shut, severing the tip of his tongue. Blood filled his mouth. His eyes rolled back into his head and his body spasmed violently. His hair - not the long strands on the top of his head but all the rest on his body - stood straight up. He twitched and jerked helplessly, blood trickling from his nose and ears.

To the taiyoukai, somehow this broken illusion of freedom being right in front of him and yet unattainable was infinitely more painful than the dark cell had been.

The current ceased to flow into his body when Tsetsukosei walked over and casually grabbed him by the ankle, dragging him across the gravelly soil for a few feet and dumping him back on the paved path. He sounded amused. "I did tell you the boundaries, puppy. Know that this shock effect can be activated by me at any time I choose, should you choose to disobey me. You WILL come when I call." The beast's voice dropped into a low growl. "But you have misbehaved. Perhaps a new lesson tomorrow will see if I allow you access to the kitchens or not."

With that, the youkai turned and strode off, leaving Sesshoumaru to twitch and jerk on the cold stone path.


	6. Chapter 5

Pride (In the Name of Love) 5 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Inuyasha truly had intended to start his investigation into the circumstances of his brother's death. Or his whereabouts if he really was alive. He had. However, the first of the challenges to his office took place almost immediately the next morning. The Lord of the South had decided to make his play for his land and had sent a small but brutally efficient army against him. Inuyasha took the assault very personally and was pouring himself into finding a way to defeat it.

Miroku saw how disappointed Rin was, however, and as he didn't serve much purpose in a demon-on-demon showdown he had begun his own search.

If he hadn't gotten so directly involved, there was a good chance they never would have found anything.

Miroku entered the chamber where Rin had been slain and the whole encounter had taken place. Although the room had been cleaned, he wasn't searching for a physical clue. Just as a matter of course, he sent out a small spiritual probe to test for the - doubtful - presence of any lingering foreign energy.

The feedback he got from the small probe almost killed him. As it was, his eyes went suddenly blank and vacant as if someone had just pulled his plug, and he crashed to the floor. Rin let out a startled yelp when she saw him topple over, hurrying to kneel next to him. He didn't respond to her initial, panicked attempts at calling his name, though he snapped back into focus with a startled gasp when she slapped him.

"M...Miroku-sama?" she whispered hesitantly.

"Buddha save me..." he mumbled, his face ashen. He had never felt anything so strong and wholly WRONG as the spiritual energy knotted up in that room. He hadn't really gotten a good look at it, but now that he knew it was there he could study it provided he was very cautious. "I think, Lady Rin, I may have found a clue," he said dryly, offering her a rueful smile.

"Really?" Rin's eyes lit up, but Miroku could tell she was making a concerted effort to not get too excited. "It...is it bad?"

"There is a lot of very evil spiritual energy tied up in this room. I've never sensed anything like it. I won't know more until I have the chance to study it, and it'll be very dangerous. I...gods, I'm not sure I'm qualified for this sort of thing," Miroku mumbled, running his fingers through his hair in uncharacteristic agitation. It wasn't often he wished he had studied harder and learned more at the monastery.

"There is no one else here that can," Rin said before looking up at him hesitantly. "Do you...think this has something to do with Lord Sesshoumaru's disappearance?"

"Yes, m'lady, I do. But it means whatever we're messing with is very strong."

"It would have to be."

Miroku thought about it for a moment and then nodded. "True enough. I suppose I'll gather some things to protect myself and see what I can find out. And I'll have to tell Inuyasha...there's a chance things could go wrong and I might get..hurt." Miroku frowned deeply. He had already been leveled with an accidental glance - what would a deeper look do to him? But there weren't any other monks nearby - nor would most be willing to come to the castle of a demon lord. Even if that lord was only half-demon and part of a little group that had been helping save everyone for years. No, he was on his own. He only hoped he was strong enough.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru had felt the bite of the vicious shock collar twice more since the previous day - once when he attempted an escape out of a window and learned that the boundary had NOT just been set at the doors, and a second time when he had not really responded to Tsetsukosei's command to come to him. His muscles were cramped and they HURT from seizing up under the electric current. The occasional twitch and spasm still jerked its way through him, causing him to stumble clumsily.

All that was forgotten, however, when he finally sank into the hot bath.

On the surface, he railed against the idea of taking this bath, not wanting to clean himself up for the damn beast's pleasure. However, the hot water was infinitely soothing and felt simply divine to his tortured frame, and he sank gratefully into its warm embrace. He was reluctant for it to ever end and only drug himself out when the water finally began to cool too far.

He pulled himself into a plain gray kimono that had been provided for him - the fabric was coarse, but it was clean and served to shield him from the eyes of the castle's many denizens. Some part of him seethed inwardly about being so grateful for such a small thing as a warm bath and clothes, but he promptly told the voice to shut up and let him enjoy what minor pleasures he could while he had the chance.

His stomach clenched painfully, but he was able to somewhat stifle its yowling with a very long drink of cool water. He then sat down lotus-style and attempted to clear his mind and find his center. If he was ever going to get out of here, he had to devote every moment he could spare to finding a way.

He had already tried removing the collar to no effect. The metal neither bent nor broke, and seemed to be solid. He couldn't even find a seam where it could have been sealed. Whatever components were within it that made it deliver its horrible shock were apparently internal and surrounded by the cool metal surface. The metal itself was a dark blackish-gray and had intricate patterns carved into its surface. A loop dangled in the front - and was equally impervious to his best attempts to damage it.

If he could somehow find a way to remove the hateful thing, he had no doubt he could escape. Or if he could find a way to remove the boundaries so he could get past them...although the thought occurred to him that maybe there wasn't so much a set of boundaries to shock him if he tried to pass them, but rather there was some focal point that activated the collar if he got out of range. That seemed more likely....and made things more difficult. Perhaps if he could find the focus and bring it with him...unless it wasn't a tangible object. Either way, it merited further investigation.

What he really needed to learn was more about Tsetsukosei's strange form of magic, this whole...Black Circle...thing, and where precisely he was. That left him with three options, and all of them made him curl his lip in distaste. He could interrogate some of the lesser demons in the hallways - and they could report things straight to their superiors or lie. Besides, they were foul, disgusting wretches. Most of them seemed half rotted, with oozing, slimy, infected flesh...covered in sores and boils. Just looking at them made Sesshoumaru want to retch, and dear gods, the SMELL...!

So talking to the minions was out. The second option was to talk to Tsetsukosei himself - and this didn't appeal to Sesshoumaru in the slightest way. Besides, it would reveal far too much. The only way the cocky demon-beast would allow it was if he truly didn't think the knowledge would assist Sesshoumaru in any way.

That left the third option - finding a library and hoping it would have some of what he needed. Despite his bestial appearance, Tsetsukosei was intelligent. Therefore, somewhere in this twisted fortress there had to be SOME sort of repository of knowledge. The problem would be finding out where the library was and if he would be allowed to access it.

The mere thought of being disallowed and needing to ask permission for ANYTHING was enough to make the proud taiyoukai grit his teeth in annoyance. The only person that had ever demanded his submission before had been his Lord Father, and it had been his right to do so as head of the family and the stronger alpha male.

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and heaved a sigh. Every instinct he had screamed at him to fight, fang and claw, to his last breath against his current lot in life. He was strong, he was powerful, he had been victorious over everyone that had dared to rail against him in challenge...and he was proud of it. He was proud to be the son of the infamous Inu no Taisho. He was proud to be the Lord of the West. He was damned proud of the place he had carved out for himself. Amongst the youkai, ALL knew who Sesshoumaru was and even if they hated him, they respected him and most even feared him. And it was all the sweeter because he knew he had fully earned it, that it was not just honor granted him by merit of his bloodline and who he was.

Intellectually, Sesshoumaru knew he could not go on as he was. He hated Tsetsukosei and wanted nothing more than to destroy him, to prevent that scaly bastard from ever again laying a single wretched claw on him. However, until he had the ability to destroy the demon - if he was indeed a demon as Sesshoumaru understood the term, certainly he was different than any other youkai he'd encountered! - until he was capable, he was making his life exceptionally and unnecessarily painful and difficult.

Sesshoumaru wondered if he could truly bring himself to offer even a token show of submission to his captor. The mere thought made him twitch and his cheeks burn with shame. He knew logically that it was the smart thing to do - why suffer needlessly for his pride? When he escaped, no one would need to know. After all, he had never heard of this Black Circle before he met Tsetsukosei in person, and he seriously doubted there were many others that had. After all, Sesshoumaru made knowing things his business.

So, he would bite his tongue and choke it down. He would shame himself and submit to Tsetsukosei. And as reward for giving the bastard what he wanted, he would ask to be allowed to read in his free time. Hopefully ... and Sesshoumaru hoped it very fervently ... offering himself as a sacrifice would ultimately be the key to his freedom.

As if on cue, with his mind made up, he felt Tsetsukosei's voice rasp into his mind. "Come to my throne room, puppy."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku frowned nervously as he slowly sat down in the circle he had painstakingly drawn on the floor. Several candles flickered lazily around the room. The smell of incense was thick in the air. Prayer beads, holy diagrams, and ofuda were strewn about. Miroku said every prayer and performed every blessing of protection he could think of, as well as a silent plea to the powers that be to just PLEASE not let this be the death of him.

In truth, Miroku doubted much of it would do a bit of good. He wasn't sure, in fact, if ANY of it would do anything to help or protect him - but he figured he'd take what he could get. He had the distinct and uneasy feeling that this was something he should not, under any circumstances, be messing with...but he'd always been a sucker for a pretty girl, especially one in distress. And Rin qualified as both of those.

The worried monk closed his eyes and took a deep, cleansing breath, releasing his worry and his doubt. No sense carrying such negativity with him. He spent the better part of an hour meditating and emptying his mind. When he felt he was prepared, he ever so slowly opened his senses to the spiritual realm.

The dark knot of spiritual energy was there, although it was more or less quiescent when he wasn't shooting probes into it unwittingly. He observed it from a distance - never before had he seen its like. It was as if the fabric of the spiritual realm that existed within the room had been wadded up and tied into a dark, squirming knot roughly the size of a child. Miroku shuddered inwardly as he looked more closely at the dark mass - it writhed and squirmed like a ball of bloated black maggots.

Miroku didn't dare to push his senses into that knot just yet - the malevolent energy it radiated was too strong. It seemed that this was not an accidental thing - whatever had been in this room had left that mass intentionally. // But what is it? // Miroku mused.

He started when the squirming mass briefly shifted, and caught a glimpse of something beyond it. // A portal of some sort? Perhaps whatever assaulted here came from this gateway, then. //

Miroku observed it quietly and took note of everything of interest. He glanced sidelong at the mass after a moment and decided to try something. He picked up his staff, murmuring softly as he dipped the end in holy water and placed a talisman on it. Ever so slowly, he inched the edge of the staff towards the knot.

The effect was instantaneous. The writhing, wormy mess retreated from the end of his staff, allowing him a brief but clear view into a very dark, stone room. Blood spattered the walls, the floor - even the ceiling. A pair of blood-soaked manacles dangled from one wall. Tattered, crimson-stained shreds of familiar silk cloth lay in a heap next to equally familiar armor. // Sesshoumaru was there! //

In his excitement, Miroku failed to pay proper attention, and was unprepared for the buildup of vicious black energy that lashed out at him. He yelped as he was hurled across the room. He would have crashed into the door had said door not opened to admit Inuyasha at that moment. The poor hanyou got a face full of flying monk, sending them both smashing into the opposite wall of the hallway.

"Dammit, Miroku, get off me..." Inuyasha muttered. Miroku wheezed and clutched at his chest. Inuyasha glanced at his friend, the sharp tang of blood filling his nostrils. "Holy shit, Miroku! What happened to you?!"

A scorched, dark bruise covered most of Miroku's chest, and was ruptured and bleeding in the middle. His hand was also burned where it had clutched his staff - which was currently no more than a small heap of ashes and melted, ruined metal. "Th'....nnn."

"Alright, don't talk. I'll get a healer to work on you and then you can tell me what you found. Did you...find something?"

"Yes," Miroku whispered quietly as his friend lifted him and carried him off towards the healer's quarters.

"Did you find Sesshoumaru?"

"Nn...no. I found...his things. He was there. I think he was...tortured. So much blood..." Miroku choked, before coughing violently.

"Damn. Just...be quiet for now. When you're better, we'll talk more, ok?"

Miroku didn't answer him - apparently, the monk had fainted.


	7. Chapter 6

Pride (In the Name of Love) 6 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Sesshoumaru strode into the throne room with his expression carefully neutral and his head held high. Tsetsukosei was sitting in a massive throne that looked as though it had been fashioned of the bones of some gigantic beast. When Sesshoumaru entered, the demon-beast gave him that terrible, too-toothy grin. "Prompt this time. You must be learning."

Sesshoumaru stiffened further, and it was only with a supreme effort of will that he kept his retort to himself and simply nodded once.

"Today I shall be visited by many important youkai of the Circle. You've been in the political game yourself a while, puppy...so you understand the importance of putting on an impressive show without...overdoing it."

Sesshoumaru nodded, wondering where this was headed. He of course knew exactly what Tsetsukosei was talking about - showing off one's status and making a silent statement of power or majesty intended to awe visiting dignitaries was something he'd done himself often enough. // But what would Tsetsukosei want to show o-...oh. Oh HELL no. // "And what is the role of this Sesshoumaru supposed to be in your...display?" he asked flatly, although he knew the answer.

"You're not so dense, puppy. You needn't ask." Sesshoumaru twitched internally - he was really, REALLY getting tired of being referred to as a puppy. He'd been an adult for almost seven hundred years. He was not old as demons went, but he wasn't an untested whelp either. Tsetsukosei continued despite Sesshoumaru's slightly drifting train of thought. "You shall sit at my feet. Here." The beast pointed with one claw. "You will neither speak nor take action without my direct order. You will allow my guests to take whatever liberties they wish and you will cater to their whims if they are so bold as to request it."

Sesshoumaru barely kept himself in check, though Tsetsukosei's sudden chuckle told him that he either hadn't fully suppressed the growl boiling in his chest or that his roiling anger was plainly evident.

"Further, you will refer to me as 'Master' from now on. If you forget, you will be shocked. If you continue to forget and I believe you are defying this order, I will make sure that all you have suffered thus far looks like a gentle massage. Am I perfectly clear, little Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru was breathing hard, his fists clenched tightly and his head down, his bangs shielding his face and the volatile mixture of shame, humiliation, and rage that was brazenly displayed. It took him a moment before he was able to swallow his emotion enough to speak. "Yes...master." The word stuck in his throat, threatened to choke him. He desperately reminded himself that he NEEDED to do this if he was to have a chance to escape. After all, there were far worse things this monster could do (and had already done) then ask him to sit and be admired by visiting youkai. A relatively easy, if humiliating experience - and then perhaps he could earn his right to research.

"Good," Tsetsukosei rasped, amused and a little surprised. In all honesty, he hadn't expected Sesshoumaru to submit at all. "Go to the third room in the west wing. This will be your room for now. There is an outfit laid out on the bed. I expect you to look your best and return here shortly."

Sesshoumaru nodded stiffly and turned to go to the room, letting out a startled snarl as a sharp but brief shock hit him from the collar. He whirled angrily to glare at Tsetsukosei. "What was that for?!" he demanded before he could contain himself.

"You will acknowledge my orders verbally and with the proper appellation, puppy. That was merely a warning. Do you understand?"

Sesshoumaru's answer came through gritted teeth. "Yes, Master." He paused, wondering if he was supposed to ask before taking his leave. Tsetsukosei glared at him.

"Why are you standing there? There is not much time! Go!"

"Yes, Master," the taiyoukai ground out before he stalked out of the room. He made his way quickly down the hall, his mood positively thunderous. The son of the Inu no Taisho, the Lord of the West, allowing himself to be claimed! Submitting to this wretch! Oh, there would be a reckoning...

That reckoning almost came sooner than Sesshoumaru would have thought when he actually clapped his blazing golden eyes on the outfit he was supposed to wear. It was crafted of the finest white and gold silks. Said silks were rather flimsy - not quite see-through, but showed tantalizing shadows through their surface - and most definitely more feminine than not.

// He's TRYING to make me disobey him... he wants a good reason to punish me... not that he needs one. But he gets more pleasure from it if its my own choice that lands me on the wrong side of his claws. //

Sesshoumaru learned a moment later that glaring at clothing, no matter how balefully, did not cause it to spontaneously burst into flames. He gave it a good effort, however.

He dared a glance in the mirror after donning the outfit and winced at his own image - he looked beautiful, to be sure...like a beautiful, pampered whore or harem-slave. The low-cut neckline did nothing to conceal the angry red scar of Tsetsukosei's mating bite - this was probably intentional.

// It could be worse...just get through the day... // he told himself desperately. // Just get through the day... //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The day turned out to be slightly less dreadful than Sesshoumaru had envisioned. He sat on the stone dais next to the throne, his chain leash keeping him in place even though he had no intent of ruining what he felt was a somewhat easy attempt to please Tsetsukosei.

Of course, nothing was ever easy.

He kept his gaze downcast - as much to obey his order as to keep from having to look at the constant parade of youkai he was being made a spectacle of for. Not all of them were as morbidly hideous as Tsetsukosei and his minions - but some were worse. Most of them ignored him, not giving into Tsetsukosei's display. // Those are the strong ones...not showing weakness by being impressed. // Several of them commented on him, ranging from minor compliments to outright lusting and gushing. // The weaklings, trying to curry favor. //

The last sort was worse, however. The truly powerful youkai were willing to take liberties with Tsetsukosei's patience, proving they were not afraid of him. Several of them inspected Sesshoumaru closely. A few were so bold as to touch him, ranging from gentle caresses and petting to outright fondling and squeezing. Sesshoumaru grit his teeth, restrained his twitching and the anger that threatened to drive him mad, and almost made it through the day.

Almost.

The last demon to visit was obviously someone Tsetsukosei respected - possibly a superior, judging by how the demon got up and bowed in respect. The newcomer was mostly humanoid in appearance, although he had twisting horns atop his head and long, pointed ears. His tongue was forked, and his limbs all looked just a little too long and spindly.

"Ah, Lord Tsetsukosei...my greetings," the newcomer said with formal bow.

"Lord Jormandar, a pleasure to have you grace my humble abode with your presence."

The two chatted, typical pointless political pleasantries. The conversation eventually slowed and Sesshoumaru heard the newcomer's voice get closer. "Ah, so this is your new pet..." Sesshoumaru's chin was grabbed roughly and his face lifted. Pitch-black, pupilless eyes looked at him scrutinizingly.

"Yes. A fine catch, if I say so myself. An inu taiyoukai."

"Ah, one of the Inu no Taisho's brood...I still say you should have taken the father."

"Hn, it wasn't worth the effort. Besides, I favored the pup."

"I see...is he as...talented...as he is pretty?"

Tsetsukosei eyed Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru wasn't moving and wasn't looking at anything. "Perhaps you wish to find out? I'm quite generous, I'd be happy to loan you my plaything." Tsetsukosei released Sesshoumaru's leash and smirked at the disbelieving taiyoukai. "Do as he says, puppy."

Jormandar smiled widely and then gave Sesshoumaru a leer "Well, come here, little pet. On your knees and show me how you earn your meals."

Sesshoumaru had frozen, simply unable to comply with the demand. Squinting, Jormandar reached out and grabbed a fistful of silver hair in an effort to speed along Sesshoumaru's decision...

...and Sesshoumaru snapped. "THIS SESSHOUMARU IS NO ONE'S PET!" With a feral roar he slashed Jormandar's face wide, his claws leaking acidic poison. He fell over the other demon in a snarling, tearing ball of rage. "THIS SESSHOUMARU IS NOT A PLAYTHING!"

Tsetsukosei blinked in surprise, then narrowed his eyes angrily. He couldn't activate the shock collar with Sesshoumaru being in physical contact with the shrieking, enraged Jormandar. With a thundering roar he leapt to his feet and waded into the fray, bodily hoisting Sesshoumaru off the other demon. Sesshoumaru whirled with a primal snarl, his claws and fangs bouncing harmlessly off of Tsetsukosei's armored hide. His eyes were blood red and rolling.

"It seems your puppy is rabid, Tsetsukosei!" Jormandar snapped, clutching at the deepest of his bleeding wounds. Tsetsukosei held Sesshoumaru at arm's length by the throat.

"You have my apologies. He is apparently not yet broken..." Smoky crimson eyes locked on Sesshoumaru and Tsetsukosei growled viciously, the sheer threat in his tone enough to catch Sesshoumaru's attention. "But that will change, and soon." The demon beast slowly squeezed his hand closed around the taiyoukai's throat. The red bled out of Sesshoumaru's eyes as he struggled to breathe and eventually fell unconscious. "Very soon."

Tsetsukosei drug the unconscious taiyoukai from the room, growling and seething as he stalked off down the hall to his personal chambers.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

In the morning, Miroku was healed enough to speak, at least. The wound had ended up looking worse than it was, although the burn was nasty and it was tender to the touch.

"So what'd ya find, monk?" Inuyasha asked eagerly.

"It seems there is some sort of...I don't know. Defended gateway of sorts, leading to a stone chamber. I saw what was left of Sesshoumaru's clothing - you know how distinctive it is...and his armor. It was..." Miroku paused, frowning. Even if he had no real love for Sesshoumaru, he didn't care to see ANYONE tortured. "It was some sort of prison cell. There was blood everywhere. A lot of it."

"So you think my brother's being tortured?" Inuyasha asked with a frown. "Even if he is a bastard, he doesn't really deserve THAT..."

"I think we could probably get through the portal, if we did it right. Then it'd just be a matter of finding Sesshoumaru and bringing him out. Chances are good that if he IS being tortured, he's too weak to get out on his own."

"Or whoever's got him is really strong."

Miroku frowned. "That's always a possibility. Or it could be a bit of both."

"Well, lets go."

"What?"

"We have to rescue him. He's a supercilious ass, but he's my BROTHER, Miroku. I don't think he'd do the same for me, but...well."

"Inuyasha, do you fail to remember that I'm laying here, severely wounded, for poking the portal with a stick? We can't just jump on through. I don't even know if you can interact with it if you can't see the spiritual realm."

"Well, dammit, find a way. Before whoever is playing with my brother decides he's not interesting anymore."

"I'll work on it. But Inuyasha, I'm...I'm not a very powerful monk. This may be way over my head."

"You'll find a way. You have to. Just get me there and I'll do the rest."

Miroku looked at his friend, so determined, and then nodded slowly. He would find a way.


	8. Chapter 7

Pride (In the Name of Love) 7 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Nothing much to report.

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Sesshoumaru slowly came back to consciousness, his head throbbing and his throat burning. A tremendous weight was settled on him, and his limbs didn't seem to want to move. Slowly his golden eyes slit open and he took stock of the situation. The lingering grogginess that was fuzzying his thoughts vanished in an instant.

He couldn't move his limbs because he was chained down, spread-eagle on a massive bed. His wrists were clamped together and tied over his head, but his legs were attached to opposite posts. The weight on him was Tsetsukosei, who was watching him intently. He growled, low and angry, when he realized Sesshoumaru was conscious. "You've done it this time, puppy. I had been so pleased with your behavior...and then you ruin it. Did you make me look a fool on purpose? You planned that all day...waited until it would hurt me the most."

// Only wish I could rightfully take credit for that... // Sesshoumaru thought to himself with grim satisfaction. It may be a small victory in light of whatever Tsetsukosei had planned for him...but it was a victory nonetheless.

Tsetsukosei shifted and grabbed Sesshoumaru by the wrist. Sesshoumaru frowned inwardly, confused - apparently, he was being held down...but why? The chains would be enough to keep him in place...

He got his answer a moment later when Tsetsukosei pulled out a metal clamp. Golden eyes widened as the reptilian monster attached the clamp to his claw on his index finger. The beast's growl was raspy and angry. "Thought it was CATS that you had to de-claw..."

Sesshoumaru let out an entirely involuntary yowl as Tsetsukosei's powerful muscles flexed and the beast tore his claw out at the roots. Pain shot through him and a bright burst of blood came from his finger, mingled with an ooze of his wicked venom. Tsetsukosei smirked and moved to the next one. One by one, he ripped out Sesshoumaru's claws. This wasn't like a flesh wound - tearing his claws out at the roots was about as grave as having a limb amputated. It was not something that would heal or regenerate quickly, if at all.

Sesshoumaru was horrified. The pain was intense, but the thought of being without his claws downright sickened him. He had other means of defense, of course, but his claws were personal. They had always been there, always been reliable. They were his weapon of choice in most cases, and now they were GONE. So was his poison, in that case...unless he got close enough to bite, he had no other way to inject it.

So caught up in his anguish - both mental and physical - the taiyoukai didn't realize Tsetsukosei had released him. The beast was smirking, turning his back to Sesshoumaru and striding across the room. He remained busy for a long while, before turning back around.

The taiyoukai glanced at what the beast held and let out an angry snarl of indignation and disbelief. The beast had threaded his talons on a string and was tying it around his neck, wearing it as a trophy and an open flag of mockery. "You slimy bastard..." he hissed, baring his fangs and yanking viciously at the chains that bound him. The chains themselves did not give, but there was a faint creak from the frame to which they were anchored.

Tsetsukosei growled, any trace of good humor vanishing as he opened the chains, hoisting Sesshoumaru - still bound at the wrists - in one hand. He threw the taiyoukai around as if he weighed nothing. Moving to an open area of the large room, he attached the chain at Sesshoumaru's wrists to a hook from the ceiling, leaving the taiyoukai to dangle. His feet were too high off the ground to actually touch, and the pressure his body weight put on his wrists - and up to his tortured hands - was extraordinarily painful.

"I do hope you survive me this time, puppy. You have pushed too far. But even if you are to die, know that your existence changes not. I hold your soul in thrall as much as your body. Your pain will be infinite and endless." The beast was examining something and then turned back to Sesshoumaru. In his hands was a whip, crafted of braided leather and razor-thin strips of wire. The end split into a half-dozen small tails, each one tipped with a gleaming metal barb.

The scourge made a high-pitched scream as it whistled through the air, cracking loudly as it struck. Sesshoumaru's body jolted and he bit his tongue to keep from crying out. The wire laid his flesh open in long, thin, painful stripes, and the barbs grabbed and tore at his flesh further.

Grimly satisfied, the beast lashed him again and again, each new red stripe seeming to drive him into an even more vicious frenzy. Hanging as he was, there was no way for Sesshoumaru to twist or move out of the way of any of the strikes, and soon all his body was a spiderweb of bloody lines, punctuated by small painful dots from the barbs.

Tsetsukosei threw down the whip and stalked forward, breathing heavily. Sesshoumaru's eyes were rolling and he was deathly pale, but he hadn't cried out. The beast moved behind him, and suddenly a line of fire shot through him, along with a gush of warm blood. The draconic youkai's talons had slowly and deliberately dug into his legs, severing tendons and rendering the limbs useless. The taiyoukai arched his body forcibly and cried out, instinctively trying to curl up against the anguish but he was unable.

The agony only intensified as Tsetsukosei abruptly released his chains from the hook on the ceiling. Sesshoumaru landed on his feet and crumbled to the ground, the pain almost making him swoon. His arms were numb and dead, pulled free of their sockets from his jerking and the weight of his own body forced to hang from them. He was effectively paralyzed, without the blessing of numbness.

Tsetsukosei crouched next to the fallen youkai, grabbing his chin roughly, his talons gouging into Sesshoumaru's cheeks. "Do you know, little puppy, that I am a master shapeshifter?"

Sesshoumaru didn't answer - he didn't think he could even if he had chosen to. He wanted desperately to embrace the blackness encroaching on the edges of his vision but could not. In the same way Tsetsukosei had somehow locked him into this form, he also seemed to have found a way to keep him conscious against his will.

"This form is the one I favor, but I am perfectly capable of modifying it to meet my every whim." As he spoke, a pair of barbed tentacles shot out from his shoulders, lashing around Sesshoumaru's wrists and holding him tightly. "I was loathe to risk your destruction, but I find I do not care in light of the shame you have brought me this day in front of my peers."

Another pair of tentacle-like limbs curled out of Tsetsukosei's sides, wrapping around Sesshoumaru's body and hoisting him up. The small spikes dug into his skin and sucked at his blood, feeding off of him. Tsetsukosei's breath was hot on the back of the taiyoukai's neck as he leaned forward, again sinking his teeth into the vivid, horrible scar that was his mating mark, his visible claim on Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru felt Tsetsukosei's new limbs jerk his thighs apart and they held him steady. He knew what was coming and his mind desperately protested, but the monster's too-large erection tore into his body anyways. Tsetsukosei smirked cruelly, pausing when he was fully hilted in the taiyoukai's smaller frame. Idly he gouged his claws into Sesshoumaru's hips, scraping them against bone. The piercing, involuntary scream the pretty taiyoukai always gave when he was entered was so satisfying...

Sesshoumaru quivered, his vision blurred from involuntary tears of pain mingled with blood from some of his uncountable smaller wounds. He heard Tsetsukosei's raspy voice near his ear - after said ear was bitten sharply. "Would you like to see where else I can grow spikes, puppy?"

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and his mouth dropped open, his scream freezing in his lungs, too intense to voice. Several razor-sharp, vicious little spikes had suddenly sprang into existence along the full length of Tsetsukosei's cock. The demon beast began to thrust his hips slowly, each motion shredding Sesshoumaru's body further.

It was too much. Despite the powerful hold over him Tsetsukosei had, Sesshoumaru could not stay conscious for long. His body was simply too damaged. He mercifully fainted a short while before the fiend's powerful orgasm hit.

Tsetsukosei smirked and dropped the broken taiyoukai to the ground roughly, allowing his tentacles and spikes to melt back into his flesh. He eyed Sesshoumaru for a moment, idly wondering if even the powerful taiyoukai's extraordinary regeneration would be able to keep him alive. He stood and casually walked from the room to bathe, leaving Sesshoumaru as he was on the floor.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You sure this is going to work, monk?" Inuyasha said doubtfully, eyeing the prayer beads in his hands.

"No," Miroku responded. "You keep asking me that and you KNOW I don't know what the hells I'm doing. But those should allow you to be able to at least see the spirit realm...and if you can see it, well, that's a step closer to being able to interact with it."

Inuyasha nodded and unceremoniously dropped the beads over his head. "I don't see nothin', monk."

Miroku sighed, leaning heavily on his walking stick. Oh, how he missed his staff... "You have to concentrate, Inuyasha. Clear your mind, focus, and open yourself up to it. Slowly."

Inuyasha huffed at his bangs and flicked his ears in annoyance - concentration and patience weren't his strong suits. However, he knew how to clear his mind and prepare himself for battle - this shouldn't be too much different. Slowly, the hanyou opened his eyes. "Holy shit..."

"I take it, from your typically eloquent response, that you see what I was talking about..." Miroku quipped. He blinked as Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga and headed for the wormy black mass. "Uh...Inuyasha, what are you doing?!" he asked in alarm.

"My brother's in there?"

"Well, probably, but you saw what that thing did to me and I just poked it!"

"I can take a lot more of a beating than you. Just...have the healers ready when I get back. Even if I don't need em, my brother might."

Before Miroku could do anything to stop him, Inuyasha grinned ferally and slashed Tetsusaiga in a vicious arc at the squirming mass. A deafening shriek made both him and Miroku wince, but Inuyasha didn't pause in his forward momentum. The worm-like things blocking the portal had parted for Tetsusaiga's slash, and the hanyou leapt into the hole before they plugged it again.

Once on the other side, Inuyasha frowned deeply. The portal was not visible from this side, and no amount of concentrating seemed to bring it back into his vision. "Fuck me. A one way door."

Inuyasha was nearly overwhelmed by the smell of stale blood - his brother's blood. As his eyes adjusted to the darkness, he could clearly see it staining the floor and the walls. The hanyou frowned deeply and picked up Sesshoumaru's armor. He felt a twinge of sadness as he looked at it, although he shook it away forcibly.

Unable to carry the armor and keep his sword properly ready, Inuyasha worked his way into it. It was too big for him and the fit wasn't entirely comfortable - he felt vaguely like he was playing dress-up. However, Sesshoumaru would want it back, so he couldn't just LEAVE it.

Inuyasha made his way to the doorway. There were no obvious scent trails to follow - his brother hadn't been here for some time it'd seem. Cautiously, he crept up the stairs, steering well clear of the slightest trace of unfamiliar youkai scent. Much as he would have enjoyed thrashing a few demons, alerting everyone to his presence would probably be a bad idea. Especially while he was in such a creepy fortress.

Once on the upper level, he caught Sesshoumaru's scent. Or more specifically, the scent of his blood. Fresh. Lots of it. Inuyasha scowled in determination and made his way hastily - but stealthily - down the hall. It seemed to be empty and carried only one youkai's scent - probably the leader or at least someone of high ranking. The lesser demons must not be allowed in this area. Good.

Inuyasha scurried down the hallway and came to a stop in front of a door. The blood-scent left no doubt as to his brother's location. The hanyou reached down, trying the handle, and was surprised when the door easily opened. // Not much for security around here. Around my brother. That's strange. Why's he still here if they aren't even bothering to guard h-- //

Inuyasha's thoughts ground to a halt as he caught the first sight of his elder sibling. Sesshoumaru lay in a pool of blood, his skin and silvery hair stained a deep crimson. His body was so covered in gouges, slashes, and tears that Inuyasha couldn't find a square inch of unmarred skin. The sharp scent of sex mingled with the blood - Inuyasha didn't even have to look at his brother's tattered body to know more of what went on.

"S...Sesshoumaru..." he mumbled weakly, dropping to his knees and reaching out, but not daring to actually touch the taiyoukai. His hand trembled. He had seen many horrible things in his life, but never had he seen a victim like this. He hesitantly felt for a pulse - it was there, fluttery and weak, but there. Inuyasha quivered, tears stinging his eyes. He noticed Sesshoumaru's bloody, claw-less fingertips....and beneath all the fresh wounds, uncountable wounds that were still in the process of healing. A vivid, bloody scar on his neck clearly marked him as the mate of...something. Inuyasha had never seen a mating bite like it before, although it looked similar to a dragon youkai's. // Sesshoumaru would never allow someone to claim him willingly...you poor bastard... //

Inuyasha sheathed Tetsusaiga and stood. He grabbed a sheet off the bed and carefully draped it around his brother before lifting him, trying to ignore how it almost instantly blossomed with crimson and stuck wetly to open, bloody wounds. "I'm getting you out of here. I'll take you home..."

Inuyasha made his way back to the hallway. With the portal closed to him, he'd just have to go out the front door and hope he wasn't seen.

Luck was with him, and he managed to make it to the courtyard. He studiously ignored the blood-trail behind him, knowing that he would be caught soon, would have to be caught soon...but hoping he had enough of a lead.

"Inu...yasha...?" a faint, hoarse voice whispered. Inuyasha saw his brother's eyes open, and he was shocked at how dim and ... vulnerable ... he looked.

"I'm getting you out of here, Sesshoumaru. You don't have to worry anymore."

Panic bloomed in his eyes and Sesshoumaru twitched, although he was still more or less paralyzed. "N...no..." he managed to choke out. Seeing his brother so alarmed both frightened Inuyasha and steeled his resolve.

"Don't worry, Sessh, I'll take care of you."

"Nnno..." Sesshoumaru choked on a mouthful of blood, but the panic never left his features. He spat it out harshly. "St..op..."

"You don't have to be afraid, Sessh, just rest," Inuyasha said.

His misinterpretation of his brother's reasoning proved very costly to both of them. Noting the first of his pursuers appearing at the main entrance behind him, Inuyasha sped up and took a leap, sailing clear over the wall that housed the main gate.

Instantly, Sesshoumaru's shock collar went into overdrive, the current slamming through him and, by contact, Inuyasha. The hanyou saw dark sparks ricochet through his skull as his muscles seized and he dropped like a rock. The impact jarred Sesshoumaru from his grasp.

Inuyasha lay, panting and pained, feeling a faint trickle of blood coming from his ears. He was deeply alarmed, however, to see the shock continuing to sizzle through his elder sibling.

Not knowing what to do, he grabbed the sheet and leapt back over the wall, doing his level best to avoid skin contact. Luck was with him and he made it. The smell of burnt flesh - Sesshoumaru's throat - almost made Inuyasha retch. A deep, rasping voice caused him to look up.

"Well, well...not one pup of the Inu no Taisho's, but both? This must be my lucky day," Tsetsukosei chuckled malevolently, looking at Sesshoumaru and advancing on Inuyasha. Before the hanyou could react, his brother was plucked up in one clawed hand.

Inuyasha looked at the figure before him and swallowed thickly. "Shit."


	9. Chapter 8

Pride (In the Name of Love) 8 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - In case you were wondering - yes, the name of this story is from the U2 song of the same name. The song in no way inspired or has anything to do with the story. I just...tend to name all my stories after songs or lines from songs. =D

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"Put my brother down, you bastard, and back off!" Inuyasha growled, yanking out Tetsusaiga. Tsetsukosei chuckled and made no move to put Sesshoumaru down, back off, or otherwise acquiesce to Inuyasha's demands.

"You come to my domain to steal from me and then expect me to let you get away with it?"

"I came to rescue my brother, asshole! Now leave him alone! Haven't you done enough?!"

"It doesn't matter what you think or what you intended. The simple fact of the matter is that Sesshoumaru belongs to me."

"The fuck he does! You can't j--"

"Actually, by the terms of our contract, he does. He traded himself to me in exchange for the soul of his human girl-child. He came willingly. Therefore, he is mine. Should he leave, our contract becomes void and I will take the girl-child instead, as is my right."

Inuyasha stared, flabbergasted. The thought that Sesshoumaru would willingly sacrifice himself, willingly undergo THIS for the sake of Rin, a HUMAN, was beyond belief. However, all the little questions were answered and everything made sense. This is why Sesshoumaru had left Rin with Inuyasha..left his mokomoko with Rin. This is why he seemed to have just vanished with no trace of a struggle.

"And now, what to do with YOU..."

Inuyasha glared viciously. "I'm not under any fucking contract with you, and I'm not going to stick around and let you capture me!"

"I suppose that is true. For now. And yet here you are, in my domain..." Tsetsukosei took a step forward, halting abruptly when Inuyasha slashed viciously at him with Tetsusaiga. The draconic beast's eyes narrowed. "You think a toy like that could harm me...? Ah, I see...it is more powerful than it appears, but you do not wish to risk harming this..." Tsetsukosei shook Sesshoumaru's limp form for a moment to indicate what he referred to. "I have no need of two pets, but you would probably fetch an excellent price on the market."

"Market? Quit talkin' like you already have me prisoner, bastard! I'm still free!"

"So you think."

"Oh, fuck you. Cocky son of a bitch...just because you tricked my brother doesn't mean you've won anything over me! I'll be back, and when I am, I will fucking DESTROY you!"

Before Tsetsukosei could react, Inuyasha leapt the wall and fled.

// Fuck, I hate to leave Sesshoumaru there...but until I find a way to kill that thing without risking his life...or Rin's... dammit! I need a plan! //

Inuyasha retreated deep into the unfamiliar countryside before pulling himself up into a black, twisted tree to think. He had no idea where he was, really. Everything was dark and twisted, like a diabolical shadow-version of the world he knew. He had no idea where he was, where home was, or how to get between the two.

However, he had no intention of leaving without his brother. It had stunned him to see the proud, mighty Sesshoumaru laying bleeding, broken, and starved. Just...discarded in a heap on the floor. Worse had been his glimpse into his brother's golden eyes, however. He looked completely devoid of life or hope.

// He seemed so surprised to see me, too...shit. I can't imagine having all that done to me and not think in the back of my mind, even for a moment, that someone would be looking for me. Even if they sometimes drive me to distraction...I have friends. Even when they can't help, they try. No matter what happens, I know they care. And all he has is Rin. He gave up everything for her...//

Inuyasha sighed and played with the hem of one of his sleeves. // What happened to you, Sesshoumaru? When did you stop being the cold, supercilious bastard that wouldn't spit on someone if they were on fire? Could one human girl have so changed you? Are you really as icy as you pretend to be? When I get you out of here, we're gonna have a long talk. If...I ever find out where here is. And how to get you out. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He slowly opened his eyes and stared vacantly at the ceiling, not bothering to move his head for a long while. His eyes were a dull amber, devoid of their usual intense sunfire spark. His arms were back in place and his hamstrings, at least, had healed - he was no longer paralyzed. Sesshoumaru simply lay where he was, and knew despair.

He had been stunned that his brother had come for him. After all the negativity between the two of them, he still came. Sesshoumaru was filled with grief and regret, now. How terribly Inuyasha must think of him. He had always been so harsh and judgmental because of his hanyou status. It was true, he had despised the human blood that 'tainted' their family, and taken it out on Inuyasha.

Regret brought a low, keening whine to his throat. He was stripped enough of his pride that he didn't make the effort to hide it. Some of his last words to his beloved father had been so cruel and harsh. He had told him how he would never forgive him...how he had lost all sense of his principles, tainted their family line...and so many more enraged, hurtful things.

And he had meant them, at the time. He had promised to kill his hanyou brother, and been brutally shocked with his father's response. "If you kill your brother, than I will have no son, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes against the tears that came anyway, their salt stinging some of his wounds. Sesshoumaru had never been able to apologize to his father for the things he HADNT meant. He had been so angry, he had simply lashed out in every attempt to wound his sire...and then he had been killed.

He had never forgotten his father's threat to disown him, and so his relationship with his brother had changed. He still despised his human blood, but his threats were...empty. He tried to blame Inuyasha for his their father's death. He took his rage out on Inuyasha, surely, and said horrible things...but what Inuyasha did not know was that he would never strike him mortally.

He grudgingly had grown to respect the hanyou's strength as Inuyasha had gotten older, and his assaults became less of an attempt to lash out at his brother and more...tests. He had found it impossible to believe that a mere hanyou could ever contend with a youkai. But every time they fought, Inuyasha proved his mettle over and over.

Sesshoumaru had been downright cruel to his brother in the words he chose. His tests wouldn't have worked if Inuyasha had realized he was being tried, of course...

And despite all the beatings, the insults, the pains and wrongs and dark thoughts he had visited upon his hanyou brother, he had still come to rescue him. He had risked his life and maybe more to rescue someone he thought despised him and wanted to kill him.

// Have I truly become such a terrible creature as this? I've treated the lowliest wretch of my kingdom a thousand times better than the only other son of my Lord Father. Perhaps this is what I deserve. At least in saving Rin, I get some small bit of redemption, although it does not begin to atone for my sins. //

Slowly the taiyoukai turned his head to examine himself. He could scarcely move, and his regenerative powers seemed to have either stopped functioning entirely or nearly entirely. His gaze lingered on the blunt, fleshy tips of his slender fingers. They had stopped bleeding, but the flesh was horribly tender. He couldn't stop staring at them, feeling as if some vital element of himself had been torn away.

// Oh, what a wretched thing I have become. I have failed you in almost every way...oh my Lord Father, please forgive your son. I have been prejudiced and judgmental. I deliberately hurt my brother when he only sought to be near me. And now I'm nothing. A clawless, defenseless plaything, good for nothing but that beast's amusement. I deserve no better. Inuyasha was right to change his mind and abandon me to this fate. Forgive me, my brother. I have wronged you. And through it all, I was so sure that I was RIGHT... //

Sesshoumaru laughed softly, though it was a strained, self-derisive sound and not one of any genuine humor. He had no will to live, but death would offer him no reprieve or change. // I do not deserve such an escape from my punishment. //

The taiyoukai took a deep breath and slowly relaxed, allowing his body to sink limply against the floor.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei stalked into Sesshoumaru's room with a smirk, noting that the taiyoukai's eyes were open. Sesshoumaru's expression was blank - somewhat sad, his stare rather vacuous. "Aww, poor puppy...your brother abandoned you to me. What a shame."

Sesshoumaru did not respond in any way.

The demon-beast narrowed his eyes. "Get up."

Sesshoumaru slowly climbed to his feet and stood where he was, head bowed.

"What, has all the fight left you, my dear little puppy?" Tsetsukosei asked, grabbing Sesshoumaru roughly by the chin. Sesshoumaru spoke, finally, but his voice was heavy and lifeless.

"Do as you want. I do not care any more."

Tsetsukosei's grin widened as he eyed the taiyoukai, searching for any sign of trickery. Without warning, he delivered a powerful backhanded smack to Sesshoumaru's face. The taiyoukai jerked and stumbled from the force of the blow, but then was still. Tsetsukosei crowed in wicked triumph.

Sesshoumaru had been broken.


	10. Chapter 9

Pride (In the Name of Love) 9 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Just have to make a point here...I couldn't ultimately fix Sesshy and make all the torment worthwhile if I didn't break him first. ^^ The price of my love is a terrible thing for my favorite characters to bear.

Also - unless I am mistaken...the character that is introduced in this chapter? All spelling mistakes in his speech are intentional.

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Inuyasha was nearly asleep when he heard a noise. He instantly became alert, his ears twitching in different directions to try and locate the source of the sound. It seemed to have come from...above him?!

Before the hanyou could react, a figure dropped down on the limb in front of him, crouching easily on the narrow surface. It appeared to be some sort of raven youkai. A pair of feathery black wings were spread slightly to help him hold his balance. His skin was white and pale, and long ebony hair flowed down his back. The front part was pulled back into a ponytail, which was further divided into several bead-studded braids. His eyes were a sharp yellow, although they lacked the golden hue of Inuyasha's or Sesshoumaru's. Tattered black clothing of no definable style covered the raven's limbs. A mischievous smile graced his high-boned, narrow face. "Greetings. Vhat brings you to my tree? I have vatched you for a vhile."

Inuyasha flattened his ears back in suspicion and annoyance, although the raven made no move to harm him. The creature's odd, thick accent made it difficult for Inuyasha to understand him at first. "I didn't realize this tree was taken."

The raven youkai chuckled and leaned forward, long and slender black talons digging into the branch. He squinted slightly and ran his eyes over Inuyasha. "A hanyou monk?...Now I really HAVE seen everyting..."

Inuyasha blinked, his hand still clutching Tetsusaiga's hilt. "Monk? What the hell you talkin about, bird-brain?"

The raven chuckled. "Zairex. My name is Zairex. And I can feel it on you...no...vait...on zometing you vear. A hanyou vearing zometing blessed by a monk, den? Ztill very ztrange to dis bird."

Inuyasha reflexively clutched the beads Miroku had given him, noting Sairex's eyes follow the movement. "Er...yeah. I have a monk friend. Look, what is it you want? Where are we?"

Sairex stood and walked along the length of the limb easily before finding a comfortable spot to perch. "Vhere are ve? Dis be da Black Circle." Sairex chuckled. Noting Inuyasha's blank expression, he blinked. "I'll make you a deal, yes?"

"Depends..." Inuyasha murmured warily.

"Zpiritual magic, it be very rare and valuable 'ere. You give me da beads and I vill tell you anyting you vish to know."

"Depends on the quality of your information, bird. If you can tell me somethin' that'll help me AND show me the way out of here, I'll let you have the beads." Inuyasha figured it was rather a good deal - the beads weren't exceptional in any way, and he had his own personal monk to make more.

"Dis is good, yes. I vill tell you all you vish. You do not know of da Black Circle, do you?"

Inuyasha shook his head.

"Zome zay dat da Circle be da outermost ring of' Hell. Dis...is not exactly true. Da Circle, it be more of...vell. It's a vorld dat exists between life and death, but is not part of either. It mirrors da vorld you know. Zee dat over dere? Rock. In your vorld, also a rock, in da same place. Tree here, tree dere. You zee, yes?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah, I got it. So is there some sort of shadow-me running around?" Inuyasha's ears flattened at the thought - he didn't want a shadow-self running about.

Sairex shook his head. "No, no...a zoul can only exist in one place. It be alive, it be dead, or it be elsevhere. Like here. Dere are both here, but more dead dan alive. And more dan a few dat are neither."

Inuyasha paused, digesting this. It was a strange concept. "Ok, I guess...so what can you tell me about the big dragon-looking bastard that lives in that fortress a few miles back?"

Sairex arched an eyebrow. "Zetsukosei? Mmm. Very long ago, in ancient times, Zetsukosei vas a royal dragon youkai. He vas very ztrong and powerful. He got involved in a civil var vith his people and it killed him..but it vas part of his plan. He had zpells in place. He made himzelf a phylactery.."

"A what?" Inuyasha interrupted.

"Phylactery. I didn't make up da vord. Anyvay. Zetsukosei vas made into a lich. Powerful undead, very zmart, lots of ztrong magic."

"...sure. So how do I kill him?"

Sairex chuckled. "Kill 'im? Mm, mm...he's already dead. Dat's vhy you can't hurt him, vhy no one can defeat him. But if you find his phylactery and destroy it...den he can be killed."

"So I just have to smash something and we're good? Sounds pretty easy. Why is he still here?"

"No one knows vhat his phylactery is, or vhere. Not to mention his army. And no one knows vhat his phylactery looks like or vhere it could be."

"So he can just willingly hop to the world of the living any time he likes?"

"Yes. He can make a portal and leaves behind demon vorms. They eat da energy and eventually deztroy da portal."

"Ah...yeah, saw some of those. So how is it you know so much?"

Sairex grinned a bit. "I've been a zpy for a very long time. I vork for many lords, for da highest price."

"And how do enchanted prayer beads help you?"

"Ah...spiritual magic means little to me..." Sairex chuckled gleefully. "But dere are lords dat try to learn Zetsukosei's magics an' pay very highly for such trinkets to ztudy. Nothing of dis zort can be made 'ere, and dey can't hop betveen vorlds like Zetsukosei can."

"...So he's really not bullshitting? He really DOES have power over life and death and souls and stuff?"

Sairex shrugged slightly. "Yes, but to a point...he may fancy himself one, but Zetsukosei is no god."

"You said you'd show me how to get home."

"If by home, you mean the vorld of da living, den yes. I can zhow you dis. Come, come." The raven youkai half flew, half leapt up the tree. Inuyasha followed suit. The tree gave a surprisingly good view of the land.

Sairex pointed off in the distance. "Hanyou, you zee? Da river dere?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Yes. "

"Da river, it flow zouth. Da head o' da river be a vaterfall pool. Zimilar in your vorld, yes?"

Inuyasha nodded eagerly - he knew EXACTLY where in his world that particular river was. "Yep."

"In your vorld, da vaterfall pool crosses a very ztrong ley-line...magic in da earth. It be a ...focal point. Many energies cross dere, an' da border betveen da vorlds is very thin. Dive deep, deep down into da pool, you'll find your vay to your vorld vhen you zurface."

"Does it work in reverse?" Inuyasha had to ask.

"Yes."

Inuyasha nodded and then plucked off the string of beads, handing them over to the eager raven youkai and holding out his hand. The raven examined his hand, then shook it firmly with a wide grin.

"You make me a rich bird," he chuckled.

"Well, thank you for your help. I have to go rescue my brother from that asshole now..."

"Zetsukosei...has your brother?" Sairex's expression grew grim.

Inuyasha's expression was grim. "It doesn't matter, I'm going to get him back."

"Den I vish you da best o' luck, my friend."

Inuyasha nodded, and with one final farewell, took off sprinting for the waterfall pool. He would need a few things before he attempted to rescue Sesshoumaru.


	11. Chapter 10

Pride (In the Name of Love) 10 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I may take some liberties with the true history of the series here - y'see, I saw *almost* all of the anime and never really read the manga due to...well. Inability more than anything. So...should I say something that conflicts with anything...be it something early on or later...consider it artistic license.

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The trip to Kagome's time had been Inuyasha's first in almost four years, and he hadn't seen Kagome at all for three of those years. Truthfully, he had never expected to see her again. He figured she had gone on with her own life in her own time, and he would do the same.

The raven's information, at least in regards to using the waterfall pool as a portal, had proven accurate. The journey had only taken a day and a half, a short trip home and then a couple more days to reach the Bone Eater's Well. Inuyasha took a deep breath and then leapt into the well.

It was darker than usual on the other side. Inuyasha grumbled as he climbed, finding something heavy on top of the well. He dug his claws into the side of the well and gave a good heave.

A tremendous crash accompanied the motion - apparently, the area around AND on the well had been made into a storage room of sorts. Inuyasha had mixed emotions about that - it was good that Kagome had moved on so thoroughly, and it stung a bit at the same time.

Sneezing from the cloud of dust he'd inadvertently created, Inuyasha picked his way out of the room and headed for the house. He peered in the window to Kagome's room and blinked several times. The room was devoid of anything remotely personal.

Panicking, he darted around to the front and was about to leap through a window when he thought better of it. Biting down his impatience with a supreme effort of will, he knocked on the front door and waited, feet tapping and his hands fidgeting with his sleeves.

Sota opened the door and beamed when he saw Inuyasha. "Hey! Inuyasha! Wow, long time no see!"

Inuyasha grinned. "Hey, squirt, you got bigger since the last time I saw you. Look, I'll come back when I can for a social visit, but right now I have a really big emergency and I need to talk to your sister."

"Oh...she doesn't live here anymore...she moved across town with her fiance."

Inuyasha wrinkled his nose and twitched an ear. "Is that some sort of animal? I thought she had a cat."

Sota snickered. "Eh, he's kinda an animal, thats for sure. No, the guy she's promised to marry."

"Oh. Hn. You humans complicate all that stuff way too much. Can you point me in the right direction?"

"I can do better, I'm heading over there anyway. Let me get a hat for you and I'll take you there."

Inuyasha nodded. "Thanks, kid."

Sota slowly peered behind Inuyasha. "Who's the girl?"

Inuyasha glanced behind him. "Oh. Er, Sota, this is Rin."

Rin's eyes were huge as she looked around, clinging to Mokomoko-sama desperately. Inuyasha knew the girl was entirely overwhelmed.

"I need her to stay with you guys for a while. She's in a whole lot of danger if she stays back in our time right now."

"Alright...I'm sure that'll be fine. She can come with us."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The visit to Kagome's was awkward and pleasant all at the same time. She'd grown up quite a bit in the past few years, and apparently settling down had done her some good. She was much calmer and more even-tempered than Inuyasha remembered.

Inuyasha expressed his regret that he didn't have time to catch up, and then launched into a rapid explanation of what he needed.

"Wait...wait a minute. Inuyasha, you're asking me to do this so you can help SESSHOUMARU? And what...is that RIN? What is she doing here?! And with Sesshoumaru's fluffy thing! What are you thinking?!"

Inuyasha sighed and rubbed his temples. "I know. I can't believe I'm doing it either, but I need your help. I don't know what to do, and I can't leave him there. You..." Inuyasha choked a bit on his words, his voice thick with emotion.

"You didn't see him. What this bastard has done to him. No one deserves that. Not even him. And I'm starting to find out, the more I dig into this, that we may have all seriously misjudged Sesshoumaru, not knowing all the facts. We only had his reactions towards me to base our opinion of him on...but now I'm finding out he was some diplomatic hotshot, all-mighty great and wonderful leader of an entire kingdom. And Rin...I think the girl's changed him. Cracked him open and let a little sunlight into that shadowy thing he called a heart. She's in a lot of danger if she stays there. She'll be hurt or worse. But I don't have time to debate this, Kagome! Will you help me with what I need or not? I don't know who else to go to!"

Kagome studied Inuyasha for a long moment and, contrary to his expectations, nodded. "I think I have an idea that just might work. Come on, we're going to the store...and I'll set up a place for Rin when we get home."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It took the better part of the day to hunt around and get together supplies that would work for their purposes, and then a bit of time to make what they needed. Rin had fallen into an exhausted sleep on the couch, totally overwhelmed from the sights and sounds of this extraordinary world.

Inuyasha stared at their creation doubtfully. "Kagome, if this doesn't work, you do know one or both of us could be severely injured or killed, right?"

"It'll work, Inuyasha. Trust me."

Inuyasha sighed and nodded, packing up their creation and then giving Kagome a brief hug. "I promise I'll visit when I can. I want to meet your new mate."

"Fiance, Inuyasha."

"Whatever. I have to go. The more time I waste, the more my brother is suffering."

Kagome nodded. "Then you better hurry up! Don't worry about Rin, I'll make sure she's taken good care of. Even if I don't have any love for your brother, she was always a sweet girl."

Inuyasha nodded, said his goodbyes and sped off towards the well.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"I finally allow you access to the kitchens to reward your behavior and you don't bother to eat?"

Sesshoumaru shrugged listlessly. He knew how gaunt and emaciated he'd grown, but couldn't bring himself to care. His eyes focused dully on a spot somewhere nearby, not really seeing anything.

Tsetsukosei squinted at the taiyoukai, trying to sense if he was somehow being tricked. However, there was no deception he could detect. Sesshoumaru had been a model pet since Tsetsukosei had chased off his brother - he had accepted any order given and not fought with him, no matter what he did to try and provoke the inu. He hadn't even argued when Tsetsukosei demanded he now sleep with him in his own bed so he could have easier access to him.

Tsetsukosei growled inwardly. He had desired to break Sesshoumaru to his will, this was true...but he hadn't expected the taiyoukai to stop focusing on taking care of himself in any fashion unless specifically commanded. His silvery hair was dull and knotted. He spent every moment when not specifically ordered to do something else sitting wherever he landed and staring at nothing.

"You will resume caring for yourself properly. On a daily basis, I expect you to eat, drink, bathe, and make yourself look not only presentable, but good. Do you understand me, puppy?"

"Yes, Master," came the inflectionless response. "Shall I begin now?"

"Yes," gritted the beast before stalking off. // Apparently, something of this brother of his damaged him more wholly than I would have expected. // "I shall be departing for a time. I have learned of something that must be dealt with. I expect to find my orders fulfilled to the letter by my return."

"Yes, Master."

Tsetsukosei growled in frustration and delivered a powerful slap to Sesshoumaru's cheek to express his displeasure, talons raking open pale skin. Sesshoumaru's body jerked from the force of the blow, but he did not otherwise respond. Angrier now, Tsetsukosei stalked out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha couldn't believe his luck when he finally arrived and found the demon beast nowhere on the grounds. It was but the work of a few moments for him to slip into the castle. His brother's scent wasn't as obvious as it had been when he'd been laying in a pool of his own blood, but it still didn't take the hanyou long to locate him. He was on one of the upper levels.

Sesshoumaru was sitting in a window, his head resting against the side of the frame, staring blankly. He didn't even look when Inuyasha entered.

Inuyasha stared at his brother in disbelief. He'd never seen him in such a state of voluntary disarray...nor had he ever seen such a lost, lifeless expression. Inuyasha was mortified - he could clearly count ribs through the thin shirt Sesshoumaru was wearing, and ...were those snarls in that silvery mane?

"S...Sesshoumaru?" he asked hesitantly. The response was a long time in coming. Sesshoumaru straightened slowly as if the act took more than a little effort. He turned his head until his golden eyes locked on Inuyasha. Inuyasha thought he saw something flash briefly and just as quickly die out.

"...Inuyasha."

"Fuck..Sesshoumaru...I..shit. Come on. I'm getting you the hell out of here before that bastard starves you to death."

"Master Tsetsukosei has granted me access to the kitchens. I have not yet gone."

Inuyasha stared at Sesshoumaru in open disbelief, his jaw hanging open. His eyes abruptly narrowed and his ears flattened back. "Sesshoumaru, if I never again hear you refer to ANYONE as 'Master', it'll be too soon. "

"I can not leave." Sesshoumaru tapped one fingertip to the collar at his throat. "It does not matter. I deserve this. Go away, Inuyasha."

"Des....WHAT?!" Inuyasha exclaimed, unable to cope with Sesshoumaru acting so...opposite to everything he was supposed to act like.

"I am sorry for the way I have treated you. It was wrong and it has brought me grief. I was angry and unjustified in my prejudice."

Inuyasha simply gawked.

"You could not help the circumstances of your birth, and I have learned not all humans are bad. I tested you and you were strong enough to bear the rights to our heritage. I do not expect your forgiveness. I abandoned you to fate when I could have cared for you, said horrid things, and inflicted damage upon you without ever explaining myself, in part out of a ridiculous notion to blame you for my Lord Father's death."

"Well...but....ok. I accept your apology. Now can we go?"

"I have many other sins to atone for. Leave me. I...I am not worth your effort. You are a better son of our Lord Father than I. Besides...the collar. And Rin would be in danger."

Inuyasha growled and dug through his pack before finding his creation. He held it aloft with a grim grin of determination. "I brought Rin to Kagome's time, so she's safe. As for the collar...I don't have any way of getting the damn thing off you, but until we can find one, I can at least keep it from zapping you."

Sesshoumaru's curiosity was piqued at least a bit, despite his seemingly all-encompassing apathy. Inuyasha held a circle of something black.

"It's rubber, I guess. Kagome said it doesn't...convi...cond....fuck. The zaps wont go through it. So we put this around the collar and attach it in place and then you can't be zapped until we find a way to get the damn thing off. And we put some padding on it so it wouldn't hurt, but we didn't have much room to work with."

Sesshoumaru's expression was doubtful. Faced with the reality of trying it, Inuyasha's wasn't much more convinced it would work. He'd felt a taste of that dreadfully powerful current, and it seemed hard to believe that just wrapping it up would be enough to halt it. Sesshoumaru finally shrugged, his voice flat. "As you will."

Inuyasha accepted that as permission to proceed and set about the task of working the rubber between Sesshoumaru's throat and the collar. He made a few adjustments and then set about lacing it tightly closed with the heavy cord they'd woven through it. It surely wasn't pretty, but it covered the entirety of the metal surface. "So I guess we should test it out, make sure it works right. Your life kinda is going to depend on it until we get the fucking thing off you."

Sesshoumaru shrugged and spun his legs out the window, simply leaping out. Inuyasha let out a yelp and darted over. He saw his brother land in a crouch just outside the fortress wall. Judging from his distinct lack of spasming and twitching, the rubber insulation must have been working. Inuyasha leapt out behind him, giving Sesshoumaru a dark look. "Dammit, if it hadn't worked you'd have been fried before I got you back inside!"

The taiyoukai shrugged slightly, obviously not caring.

"If you don't give half a shit about yourself, Sesshoumaru, then fine. But at least don't make all that I've risked to retrieve your sorry ass a waste."

Sesshoumaru nodded once. "My apologies."

Inuyasha nodded grimly. "Come on. I know how to get us home. And maybe whatever is powering that damn thing will burn out or something when we get too far." With that, he took off with a leap. He skidded to a stop a short while later, realizing that his brother was fading rapidly from sight. He blinked in confusion and exasperation before running back. "What the hell are you doing?"

"Walking."

"WHY?!" Inuyasha demanded, feeling suddenly like he was dealing with a difficult child, although the look Sesshoumaru gave him a moment later broke his rage into a wince of pain.

"I do not have the strength for anything more." Indeed, every step he took did seem to be a supreme effort on Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha was horrified by the image of his brother trudging...SESSHOUMARU, trudging and not gliding along as gracefully as if his feet didn't even touch the ground!...in the direction Inuyasha had pointed out.

"Fuck me...god, I'm sorry Sessh..." Inuyasha debated asking if Sesshoumaru would like for him to carry him, but one look at his brother's eyes stilled the question in his throat. If his brother was to regain any of his pride, he wouldn't do it by feeling like a burden.

However, that didn't mean Inuyasha couldn't passively help out some. "I'll be right back." He hopped off and returned a moment later with a stout walking stick he had cut from the forest. He handed it over. He knew their progress would be slow...but with Rin safe and Sesshoumaru free of the beast's clutches, Inuyasha didn't feel the same press of time he had previously.

Sesshoumaru eyed the stick, then slowly looked at Inuyasha before nodding once, the tiniest flicker of gratitude at Inuyasha's understanding flicking across his features. Together, the two of them headed into the woods.


	12. Chapter 11

Pride (In the Name of Love) 11 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So the Inu brothers have escaped! Roaming the wilds and all that good stuff. It took Inuyasha about a day and a half to make the journey at speed, so...it'll probably take a while longer otherwise. But there's no reason to hurry...and why would any pursuit think they were casually strolling along, right?

Things are not all they seem, however. After all, Bad Guy is in Location Unknown...and they have no idea of the world they're in. Oh, the action is far from over. This fic is looking like it'll be bloody long...and before anyone asks, no, I do not know how long. Y'see, I don't write from a script. I just sit down in the morning and start typing and then I get to read it and discover what I wrote. Stories...happen...for me. They aren't pre-planned events. They just kinda come through me.

And this is my first IY ficcy. ^^ Previously I was almost exclusively a GW author...still working on a couple there. And I had a couple Fushigi Yugi ones in the works, thought he script is on my dead comp...Anyway, on with the story.

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They pressed on for as long as Sesshoumaru's waning strength held out. Inuyasha wanted to get the hell out of the area, and Sesshoumaru apparently shared his wish. Things slowly ground to a halt however. Sesshoumaru trudged forward with grim determination, leaning more and more heavily on his walking stick as the ground slid away behind them. He stumbled eventually, and Inuyasha caught him. They went on for a while longer, with Inuyasha helping support him.

Inuyasha was grateful they'd made it as far as they had. Sesshoumaru finally collapsed beyond his ability to go further. They made camp pretty much where he dropped, in a tiny clearing in the dark forest. Dark seemed to be a word that applied to everything in this shadow-world, however, so it wasn't any more foreboding than any other location they'd been in previously.

Sesshoumaru sat huddled near the fire, staring deeply into the flames as if he could almost grasp some divine but horrible truth contained within the flickering embers. Inuyasha had never seen such a forlorn, lost look on anyone before. The fact that it was his previously ice-cold, stoic brother made it even harder to accept. He eyed his elder sibling uncomfortably, not at all sure how to deal with this.

He was having a hard time accepting that he'd lost his hatred for his brother, if indeed he'd ever truly held it. Sesshoumaru was MUCH more than Inuyasha knew - ultimately, they were strangers. And they were family. That had to count for something.

And didn't Sesshoumaru just apologize to him, and explain - albeit briefly - why he'd done the things he'd done? Inuyasha was rather surprised that almost all of Sesshoumaru's actions against him had nothing to do with him personally, or anything he'd done - but simply that he was born a hanyou. Somewhere in his mind he'd always thought it was just an excuse, a barb...but no. Sesshoumaru was truly worried that he would weaken the bloodline. Inuyasha was more than a little angry about that, but he guessed he could at least on the surface see his brother's point.

Sesshoumaru and his father were royal demons with a name and reputation that MUST be kept up to keep their rule of the Western Lands secure. Any weaknesses - even a perceived one - could prove troublesome, possibly disastrous. Their father's sudden interest in a human and the child of that union - it could definitely look like a weakness to others.

And so Sesshoumaru had been angry...and he had left Inuyasha to survive on his own, despite his admitted guilt for doing so. And Inuyasha had survived. So Sesshoumaru tested his strength...insulted him, attacked him, tried to hurt him...and Inuyasha had proven himself worthy.

And Sesshoumaru changed his mind about him, and had truly and deeply apologized. // This could be the start of a whole new relationship between us. I don't know how I feel about that...shit, I spent so long convinced that I hated him...but...I think it'd be good. I'd like to try it. And he doesn't have anyone except Rin. He could use a friend, and a brother. Though if he doesn't eat something soon he'll break in half if he tries to stand...fuck, he's skin and bones. //

Inuyasha stood up and stretched, yawning loudly and over-exaggeratedly to draw his brother's attention. Haunted amber eyes flicked over to regard his little performance. "Well, now that we're set up, I think I'll go out and hunt us up something to eat," Inuyasha said cheerily, hoping the thought of food would brighten his brother's mood.

Sesshoumaru flinched almost imperceptibly, his eyes drifting down to his empty fingertips. Inuyasha cursed mentally but hopped off anyways. His brother's distress wasn't going to vanish if he stuck around another couple minutes, and he DID need to eat.

Hunting proved more of a feat than Inuyasha would have previously assumed. Living, breathing, edible creatures seemed to be a bit more scarce than he would have guessed. Eventually he found a large, shaggy black boar with red eyes and spikes growing at odd angles. // Spiked pig? It'll do. // Killing it proved to be more of a feat than he would have guessed. The beast was short, squat, and strong. Its hide was very thick and leathery.

Eventually, however, the hanyou triumphed - despite a few bruises and cuts that healed before he even got his prey back to camp. Inuyasha wasn't surprised to see that Sesshoumaru didn't seem to have moved an inch from how he left him.

The hanyou dropped the boar with a thump. "Damn. That thing's heavy. Well...soup's on!" Inuyasha cheerily gestured to the boar. Sesshoumaru's eyes were riveted on it, but he still hadn't moved. "Er. Sessh. Eat."

Still his brother didn't move, then he forced his gaze back to the fire. "Its your kill. I am not hungry."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes in exasperation and growled. "Sesshoumaru, you are going to eat this damn thing if I have to rip it up and force it down your throat, ya get me? If you don't get some of your strength back you'll die before we even get back home. And then how the fuck will you protect Rin or take back your job?"

"I am no longer fit to rule, nor take care of Rin."

"Oh, fuck me. You can't be serious..."

Sesshoumaru didn't bother to respond.

Inuyasha sighed heavily - he was SO not good at this comforting thing. "Are you at least going to eat?"

Sesshoumaru gave him a bitter, acidic look that was a bit more what Inuyasha was used to. "By savaging it open with my teeth, perhaps? This Sesshoumaru does so relish the thought of a mouthful of boar hair. Delectable."

Inuyasha blushed, having forgotten about his brother's lack of claws. Or anything else to cut with, for that matter. Once again, he was left feeling like an insensitive ass. Mumbling to himself he set to work rapidly skinning the beast and shredding its flesh.

Sesshoumaru's bitterness seemed to melt at the smell of so much fresh meat and blood. His stomach cramped violently, painfully - in his entire time at Tsetsukosei's fortress, he had only eaten a handful of times, and never fresh meat. An involuntary growl rumbled in his throat, but the taiyoukai didn't notice. Inuyasha arched an eyebrow and snagged himself a haunch before gesturing grandly at the majority of the beast that remained. "S'all you."

Sesshoumaru's eyes flashed a bloody crimson and he lunged at the carcass, largely ignoring the bits Inuyasha had made easy for him and savaging the thing with his teeth anyways. Inuyasha blinked and edged back a slight bit - he had never seen such a display of bestial savagery on his typically elegant and proper brother's part.

Inuyasha watched in growing amazement as the beast was devoured. Sesshoumaru eventually growled a bit at the bare bones, and Inuyasha had the feeling if he could have fit his mouth around him, his brother probably would have cracked them open and sucked out the marrow.

Not caring that he was now a bloody mess, the taiyoukai drug himself back to his spot by the fire and dropped down to the ground, curling up and going to sleep without a word.

Inuyasha couldn't help but grin - he knew that this would do his brother a world of good. He finished his own meal and settled back comfortably against a tree, Tetsusaiga resting across his lap. His eyes closed as he rested, but his nose was constantly testing the wind and his ears flicked about in various directions to pick up the slightest of sounds. Nothing would sneak up on them.

Inuyasha was almost asleep when a soft whimper caught his attention. His eyes jerked open as he looked around, trying to locate the source of it. When an anguished whine came again, he realized their source. His brother.

Sesshoumaru was quivering, lost deep in the throes of some horrible dream. Inuyasha crept over to him slowly, wondering if he should wake his brother. What he saw made him stop. Tears. Sesshoumaru was crying.

The pained, blood-chilling howl of raw torment his brother loosed a moment later froze Inuyasha in place. He stared, mortified, before quickly shaking Sesshoumaru's shoulder. "Sesshoumaru! Wake up!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes flew open in raw panic and he clutched Inuyasha's wrist with surprising force. When he realized who it was waking him up he slowly released his grasp and laid his head back down with a soft, keening moan, curling up into a tight ball.

Inuyasha could only assume he had fallen back asleep after no further movement or noises issued forth for a long time. He had never felt so helpless in all his life.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Morning - or what passed for morning here - came, as it was wont to do. Sesshoumaru woke up feeling better than he had in ages, although he felt terribly dirty and was a mess of dried blood. He winced - he was absolutely covered in it. Not that this was the first time he'd awaken with blood all over him recently - and at least this time it wasn't his own!

Inuyasha heard him stir and blinked open his eyes sleepily. "Mrr...mornin'..."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly, still looking at the dreadful mess he'd made of himself. However, he knew it had been worth it. He felt better, stronger. He knew some of his lingering wounds had started healing again as well - he could move without his internal injuries tearing open again.

"You look like you could use a bath."

Sesshoumaru nodded again, sniffing slightly to try and catch the scent of nearby water. Inuyasha was doing the same. Soon the two of them were heading off to the east of their little encampment towards a stream. The stream actually connected to the river that ultimately connected to their destination.

When they arrived, Sesshoumaru set down his walking stick and then began systematically disrobing. Inuyasha had seen the spiderweb of scars and lashes that covered his brother's body, but it was still hard to look at them again. He swallowed the lump in his throat. // Just need to get him healthy again and most of that'll fade out. Wish it was that easy for his brain. //

Sesshoumaru waded into the slightly chilly water and began vigorously scrubbing himself with some fine sand he found on the riverbed. Once he was convinced that he had cleansed his body - more harshly than necessary, Inuyasha noted, in light of a few places he'd scraped his skin rather raw - he shifted to scrubbing his clothes. The thin silks may not be his choice of outfit, but it was all he had right now.

Inuyasha watched him, not knowing what to say to break the silence. He still had the distinct impression that Sesshoumaru was only going with him because he had no ambition to choose a different course, not because the taiyoukai had any care to escape. However, silence was not one of Inuyasha's strong suits. "So, whats the first thing you want to do when we get back home?"

Predictably, Sesshoumaru didn't respond except for an almost imperceptible shrug.

"Well, one of the first things we have to do is go to Kagome's time. When we get there I'm sure they'll have something so we can get that damn collar off."

Again, no real response from his brother. Inuyasha tried hard not to sigh as he busily cleaned his own clothes. "Look, Sessh...none of this was your fault. A--"

"It was entirely my fault. I could have let him take Rin."

"Fuck, no you couldn't have. If you did and I found out, I probably would have never wanted to come for you."

"...You should not have. I don't even know why you did. I deserved it."

"Stop saying shit like that. How the fuck did that bastard get you so down on yourself? You were always so damn proud, oh, look-at-me-im-the-big-bad-taiyoukai-alpha-male, hear me roar."

"...I was a fool. I was arrogant, blind, prejudiced, and stupid. What have I to be proud of? Power? What does it matter when I can be so easily crushed? The only one who would mourn my passing is Rin, and I have probably wronged her in keeping her from humans in a misguided attempt to protect her. If half of the truth was known, I would be a source of great amusement and derision to the youkai world. I am a disgrace to my House. I am no longer fit to rule, if ever I was. Our Lord Father..." Here Sesshoumaru stopped, unable to continue his angry, self-hating tirade.

"And if you believe all that, maybe you really ARE stupid."

Sesshoumaru turned a wounded glare on his brother, tears threatening to escape the corner of his eyes. He was quivering, and he couldn't seem to stop the tremor of his muscles. He looked away and then slowly got out of the water, sitting on a rock and running his fingers through his dripping hair in a feeble attempt to get some of the snarls out.

Inuyasha wanted to either hug his brother until he made him believe everything would be alright...or knock him on his ass off the rock he was sitting on and then club him with it. // This is going to be a long trip...and I don't mean just the traveling. I am SO not qualified for this... //


	13. Chapter 12

Pride (In the Name of Love) 12 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I was talked into writing this chapter early... Much love to you-know-who-you-are.

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The journey towards the waterfall pool over the next couple days was uncomfortable, at best. Inuyasha made repeated attempts to crack jokes or lighten the mood, but his attempts either failed miserably or backfired and he ultimately felt like cramming his foot down his throat. Sesshoumaru never smiled or gave any sign that anything at all interested him. He had nightmares every time he slept. The burned out and lifeless way he regarded everything threatened to choke Inuyasha and drag him into despair too. His brother obviously was not going to just snap out of it any time soon.

However, the trip ended up being shorter than they had predicted - Sesshoumaru was physically recovering quickly with the help of proper nourishment. He was by no means all better, but...he was at least headed in the right direction. Inuyasha was about to announce their near-arrival to the pool when Sesshoumaru held up a hand for him to be silent. Inuyasha sniffed and caught a slightly familiar scent...Sairex, the raven demon. Another insidious scent drifted his way, and he was suddenly glad they were downwind.

Sesshoumaru's already pale skin blanched further and his eyes widened as he froze in place. Inuyasha couldn't blame him. But...what was Tsetsukosei doing HERE, and what was that sneaky raven doing here too?

"Stay here, Sessh..." Inuyasha whispered, drawing Tetsusaiga and creeping forward to peek out of the undergrowth, careful to stay downwind of the other too.

The scent of fresh blood caught his nostrils, and his eyes widened in alarm. Sairex was hanging from a wooden pole, bound tightly with his hands over his head. Several minor bruises and gashes covered him, but the raven seemed more annoyed than anything.

Far more annoyed was Tsetsukosei, who was stalking back and forth, quivering in blatant rage. "Damn you, raven, you WILL tell me what I want to know!"

Sairex sneered, curling his lip in a derisive smile. "Kaaa, vhy vould I tell you anyting? You tie me up an' try to buy my knowledge vith threats? Zetsukosei, you're ztill a fool."

Tsetsukosei growled and flexed his claws menacingly, his voice a roar. "TELL ME WHY I CANNOT FIND THE GIRL'S SOUL! No spirit is beyond me, living or dead!"

Sairex looked bored. "No."

"So help me, I will lock you away in a dungeon so deep you wont even remember what the sky looks like!"

"Your threats carried no veight vith me vhen I DID vork for you, vhy vould I care now? You von't kill me, because you know dat da information I have vould die vith me. Release me, dis is ridiculous. I'm getting tired of hanging on dis pole."

"You're my prisoner, you idiot! I don't take orders from you! I should kill you just for telling that blasted hanyou about this place! Tell me what you know about the Inu no Taisho's pups, then."

"Kaa, vhy? Zezzhoumaru is his father's zon. He is honorable, a fair ruler, and very powerful. He is young yet, but one day he may even surpass his father. You should have left jim alone, he probably never would have found you or cared. You still borrow trouble for yourself, Zetsukosei!"

The enraged draconic beast delivered a stinging slap to the raven-youkai's face, speaking through gritted teeth. "What of the younger?"

Inuyasha's ears perked up, eyes narrowing. How much would this raven say?

"Kaa. He is a hanyou, but he has his father's blood and vields his father's fang. He's formidable."

"YOU AREN'T TELLING ME ANYTHING I NEED TO KNOW, DAMN YOU!"

Sairex smirked. "Of course not. I hate you."

"You still hold a damn grudge, bird?"

Sairex's black eyes narrowed and he practically exploded, thrashing against his bindings. "Of course I hate you and hold a grudge, damn your rotten hide! You vere da one dat trapped me in dis place and ruined my life! Kaaa!"

"...Well, its not my fault you were damn good at your job. You're an exceptional seer...amongst your other...mm. Talents"

"Damn you, Zetsukosei, let me GO! I vill not help you in dis! Or anyting! And furthermore, you're vasting your time! Dere is NO vay dey wouldn't have been here by now...zo dey must have gotten ahead of you vhen you were ZO preoccupied vith catching me. I hope dat hanyou DOES kill you zo I can get OUT of dis damn vorld once and for all!"

Tsetsukosei roared in rage, snatching the raven by the throat and ripping him so forcefully from the pole that the heavy ropes bit into his flesh until they snapped. He shook the bird-youkai violently, barely keeping from tearing him in pieces. "Tell me...where...the human girl-child is. Now. I will not ask you again."

Sairex mumbled something unintelligible, shaking his head and struggling to breathe. "Good...it zaves me da trouble of refusing you again."

Tsetsukosei let out a roar of pristine fury and whipped the bird into the pool. His body twisted and then grew. Inuyasha gulped at the beast's suddenly massive size. Tsetsukosei lunged forward at the high rock walls and began tearing out massive chunks of stone, hurling them into the pool with a fury.

Inuyasha gaped in horror as the water began to overflow the basin's sides rapidly as the pool filled with immovable blocks of rock. // The portal! No! And the damn bird...oh shit... //

The hanyou blinked in shock a moment later as a tiny, tattered black form shot up into the sky. It was a raven. It cawed angrily at Tsetsukosei but was gone before the massive, snapping jaws could catch it.

Unsure of what to do, Inuyasha hastily slid off back towards his brother. "Sessh, we have to get out of here. This portal is closed, but there has to be more than just one. The...the thing wants Rin, but he can't find her. So lets go!...Why are you just STANDING there?! Sessh, come ON!"

"...If you leave me, he will not follow you."

"Yeah, if I intended to leave you to that damned thing, I wouldn't have come back for you in the first place. "

Sesshoumaru still didn't budge before finally looking at Inuyasha. "...Why do you care? I've been horrible to you."

"I'm hoping that could change. I'd like a real relationship with you, alright? So come on. We can have touching, lovey-sappy moment LATER."

Sesshoumaru hesitated, then nodded with a sigh and headed off with Inuyasha.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They didn't stop for the night until Sesshoumaru was simply exhausted. The taiyoukai sat by the fire, reluctant to go to sleep, especially with the smell of his recent tormenter still emblazoned in his mind. Inuyasha frowned at the sight of his brother visibly forcing himself to stay awake, his body jerking at the slightest sound. The scent of his fear was almost tangible.

"Sessh...you need to sleep."

"No. This Sesshoumaru does not wish to d...I am not tired."

"I thought 'this Sesshoumaru' never lied."

Sesshoumaru's expression flickered briefly into the exasperated, irritated glare that Inuyasha knew so well. Inuyasha didn't care - it was an emotion. "I didn't lie."

"You're about to pass out."

Sesshoumaru muttered. "I'm exhausted...not tired."

Inuyasha blinked. "Oh, ha ha. Come on. Lay down. I'll watch you."

"No."

"Oh, do NOT try having a contest of stubbornness with me, Sesshoumaru."

"Leave me alone."

"You're going to sleep whether you like it or not."

"And you intend to make me?"

"Yes."

"How?"

Inuyasha thought for a moment, then simply lunged forward and tackled his unsuspecting sibling to the ground, wrapping himself around the slightly larger taiyoukai from behind and holding him pinned and immobile. Normally this would have been entirely impossible, but in Sesshoumaru's weakened condition, Inuyasha managed to pull it off.

"Let me go." Sesshoumaru demanded. Inuyasha's fierce expression faltered, feeling the trembling in his brother's exhausted body. He relaxed his death grip into an awkward but unyielding embrace.

"No. You still...still need some sleep. And if I have to hold you until you get it, I will."

"Stupid, stubborn hanyou..." Sesshoumaru muttered, closing his eyes with a huff. There was no real heat in his words, however, and Inuyasha rejoiced at hearing them.

// Better than the apathy and silence, at least...that sounds a little more like the Sesshoumaru I know... but now what? How the fuck will we get home? //


	14. Chapter 13

Pride (In the Name of Love) 13 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - And so, the plot thickens. Again, thank you to all my lovely reviewers...I'm always so flattered to open my inbox and see these wonderful things said about me. Keep it up, you make this all worth while.

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Sesshoumaru clawed his way out of sleep slowly. He was reluctant to do so, but something was bothering him and he couldn't quite place it. And something else... // Why am I so warm...? Mokomoko-sama does not usually wrap me so tight...// It took him another few moments of confused half-sleep before he recalled that he no longer had his mokomoko. Golden eyes snapped open and he regarded his brother.

Somehow, in the night, Inuyasha had went from his restraining grip behind Sesshoumaru to end up snuggled up against his chest, limbs thrown haphazardly but tightly around his elder sibling's warmth. Sesshoumaru mentally recoiled and hastily - but cautiously, he didn't want to wake him - extricated himself from his too-snuggly brother.

Then he realized what it was that had been bothering him. He smelled the faint scent of blood. His eyes almost immediately caught movement on the other side of the slowly failing campfire.

Sairex cocked his head to one side, a slight smirk on his lips. "Do not vorry, Zezzhoumaru. I am not here to bring you harm."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes in suspicion, casting about and searching for something to use as a weapon. He didn't want to have to resort to waking up his brother to protect him. He hadn't yet admitted to Inuyasha that all of his other youki-based abilities, such as his light whip, weren't working. He couldn't even transform to his true form. He still didn't know why, but suspected he was either too weak or it was an effect of the collar at his throat.

The prospect of being nearly unable to defend himself was a horrific one to Sesshoumaru. Sure, he could still bite, punch, or kick...but with his strength being sorely limited due to his recent traumas, that wouldn't serve him too well against most demons. His deadliest weapon remaining was his bite, and he wasn't sure he had the speed to get close enough to snag a chomp at most opponents, or that it would do sufficient damage.

"I meant it. I'm not here to harm you, I'm h'ere to varn you. I know your brother vas at da pool yesterday, but Zetsukosei can't zense him and I kept him distracted enough dat he didn't zee him either. Zetsukosei can't zense you either, and it frustrates him to no end." The raven looked grimly pleased by this.

"Why?" Sesshoumaru asked, still suspicious.

"Because you and your brother are both zhielded from him. Da only reason he found you in da first place vas dat he vas vatching your castle for a long time. And you royal inu types are fairly...distinctive."

"Why are we shielded? And how?"

"I zhielded you. How? Vith zome zpiritual magic. I'm a...zeer...of zorts. It vasn't hard for me to take vhat I knew of zcrying and zoul-zearching and zimply...mm...blur the edges a bit so you vould remain undetected."

"Why." Sesshoumaru demanded rather than asked. Sairex looked at him with a slight grin.

"I vas an...associate...of your father's. Dere has never been a demon of Inu no Taizho's caliber to valk da vorlds before or zince. You, if you live, vill eventually be that ztrong. Maybe even ztronger. You are very powerful, Zezzhoumaru." Noting the narrowing of golden eyes, Sairex rolled his own. "Zo impatient, though. Dat is not a trait da Inu no Taizho vas afflicted by. You are young yet, ztubborn, used to getting your own vay. Not everyting vill jump to heed your command, Zezzhoumaru. But I vill answer your question.

"A very long time ago, vhen I vas ztill young, I met your father in a political meeting. My parents vere meeting vith his. He and I zpent a lot of time together dat zummer, until I vas forced to come here and lost all contact vith him. Da reason your father got tangled up on Zetsukosei's bad zide had to do vith all dat. However, I learned vhen Zetsukosei discovered you and zhielded you as best I could, as a favor to your father. You vere very young den, younger even dan your human girl-child is now."

"What do you know of Rin?" Sesshoumaru demanded, lips twitching towards an involuntary snarl despite himself. The raven held up his hands placatingly.

"I know vhere zhe is, and I know vhy Zetsukosei cannot find her. Zhe's moved troo time...zhe no longer exists here, but many years in da future. Zhe is zafe, unless he finds out how to move troo time himzelf. I'm not zure the idea has ever occurred to him. But anyvay....your father refused to give up his little pup.

"Zetsukosei vas not very happy about da decision. He vas hopping mad, in fact. He did not have much power in your vorld, however. He zwore his vengeance and left. Vhen he learned of da Inu no Taizho's death...and dat he'd had a zecond zon, he began looking into your vorld again. I zhielded your brother den as a precaution. "

"So the fact that I am here at all is ultimately your fault."

Sairex blinked and then winced. "If you really care to boil tings down dat far, I zuppose you could blame me, yes. I do not regret my meeting vith your father, even if it did anger da damn dragon. But I do not believe you zeriously blame me for dis."

Sesshoumaru shook his head slightly. The raven had not done anything to intentionally cause all of this.

"HEY! You're alright!"

Both Sairex and Sesshoumaru jumped - apparently Inuyasha was awake. The hanyou leapt over to inspect the raven. "Eh, you seem to be in one piece."

Sairex nodded. "Yes. I vas just...talking vith your brother."

"Good. So, short of ripping all those damn boulders out of that pool, how are we going to get back home?"

Sairex paused, brooding. "Kaaa...dere are very few portals betveen vorlds, Inuyazha. I could help you more directly, but if I do, I may bring pain to your monk friend."

"Eh? Miroku? How?"

Sairex paused and fidgeted. "Vhen I told you I had no use for your beads, it vas not true. I truly intended to do vith dem as I zaid, and I did... I really didn't need dem, however. I have my own power."

"So how does that make you have to hurt Miroku to get us home?"

"Vell, da chances are good your monk friend is zearching for you, concerned for you. And he can locate you. Da vay his magic vorks is different from Zetsukosei's. You're not hidden from him."

"Knowing Miroku, I'm sure he IS looking for us."

"Vell...I could look for him in return...and I could fight him. If I vas able to defeat him in a battle of vills, I could den open a portal from your zide. Portals cannot be opened from this zide. The door only zvings one vay, zo to zpeak."

"And this would hurt Miroku?"

"Vell, I vouldn't try to hurt him. But he'd not know I vas just trying to help you and he vould fight me. He might hurt himself in the process."

Inuyasha paused, chewing on his lip. "Hurt him bad? Or would it be minor?"

"I vould endeavor to make it as peaceful as possible. He may zuffer zevere headache or nauzea...unless he's very, very ztrong. Den it could be vorse."

"And if you thought it would be too bad, you could stop, right?"

"Yes, of course."

"Is there any other way for us to get back home? Are there any other portals at all nearby?"

Sairex paused, giving it serious thought. "The closest I know is zeveral months journey to da north, in da mountains. And dat's taking into account dat I fly vith demon zpeed and no land-based obstacles."

Inuyasha sighed heavily. He hated knowing he would be hurting one of his friends, but the alternative was worse. He didn't like the sickly, vacant look that had settled into his brother's eyes again. "Alright, try it. But be careful. If you hurt my friend very much, you won't have to worry about Tsetsukosei catching you again. You savvy?"

Sairex gave Inuyasha a half-grin. "Yes, I...zavvy."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku frowned. It was so hard to keep track of Inuyasha's life force. // At least its still there, though.. // He sighed and shifted slightly, his meditation starting to fall apart. Probing for his friend was a lot more exhausting than he had ever thought it would be.

Suddenly, Miroku felt a presence. Intrigued, he turned his minds eye towards it...and let out a startled gasp as it flew straight for him. He could feel it sinking into his mind.

With all the force he could muster, the monk tried to force the intruder out. He leapt to his feet with a shout, clutching at his skull. He was relieved when he felt the pressure lessen, the intruder forced back some.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex grit his teeth - the monk was stronger than he had anticipated. If he had not cared whether or not he damaged him, this would be far easier. The monk was strong-willed but vastly untrained. He didn't even realize his own potential, didn't realize the spiritual energy he had at his beck and call should he train to utilize it. // Such a waste. If these two inu do manage to kill Tsetsukosei...and they'll have to if they ever want to be free of his revenge...I will ask to serve them. And perhaps I shall even train this monk. So much potential, I've rarely seen it's like...I'm so sorry, monk, but damn it, you HAVE to let me in..! //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku fell to his knees, panting harshly. He desperately whispered prayers and blessings, anything to try to stop this horrible possession. It HURT and he had to admit it, he was terrified. He'd had demons attempt to possess him before, but it had never been like this. He could feel an intense spiritual power in this demon...power, he knew, that dwarfed his own. // So why doesn't it just force its way in? Surely it could...couldn't it? //

Miroku really didn't know. He just knew that he had to fight. He gathered what he could of his failing energy and pushed it at the intruder, lashing out violently and with the full force of his desperation..

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A thin cry of anguish tore itself free of the raven youkai, and it took everything he had not to lash back at Miroku, not to deflect that terrible lash of energy hurled at his spirit.

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru leapt up in concern, but Sairex had fallen deeper into concentration despite the blood that was starting to trickle slowly from his pointed ears.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Suddenly, the fight was over. Miroku had given everything he had in a last-ditch effort to throw his attacker out. He had thought for a moment he had succeeded, and a warm rush of relief and triumph started to flood through him. It abruptly ceased when his attacker lunged back up and simply dove forward with unstoppable force, bowling poor Miroku over mentally.

His gasp of horror faded as his consciousness was herded into a corner of his mind. His body started moving of its own accord. Miroku panicked and mentally beat at the walls of his prison, blinking when he heard himself speak - although he had picked up the STRANGEST accent. "Do not vorry zo much, little monk. I am zorry I had to do dis, but your friends need to come home. I vill give you back to yourzelf zoon."

Miroku stopped hurling himself at his mental cage, instead watching curiously as his body performed a few intricate rituals, murmuring and chanting softly. The air before him shimmered and slowly bent inward, parting. It revealed a dark forest scene.

Miroku was astonished to see Inuyasha come bounding through the portal a moment later. A quiet, subdued looking Sesshoumaru followed him, head bowed. // What the hell is he wearing? It looks like a harem outfit... //

Inuyasha looked at Miroku cautiously. "Miroku? Or is that you, bird?"

"It is Zairex, but your monk is zafe." As he spoke, he reached through his portal and fished around until he found what he was searching for, wincing. "I'll feel dat in a minute..." He held out his hand, revealing three of his long flight-feathers. "Dese vill let you find me...or call me to you vhen you are in da Black Circle. I'll know vhere you are and be able to help. One for each of you inu, one for your monk friend. It vill help him bond vith me easily next time I have to zend you home, zo he doesn't tink he's being attacked. Again, I'm zorry for that, monk."

"Thanks, Sairex. You're okay, I guess."

The raven-in-monk form grinned, and then Miroku's face went blank as the portal shut. His body stumbled forward and Inuyasha caught him. He blinked several times, rapidly.

"Miroku?" Inuyasha asked, helping his friend stand. He blinked when he as abruptly but briefly hugged.

"Dear Buddha, I was worried. You were gone for a lot longer than I expected. I'd feared the worst. And I'm so glad to see you back in one piece, Lord Ses....Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru was nowhere to be seen.


	15. Chapter 14

Pride (In the Name of Love) 14 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - LOL oh dear, I'm sorry to make you guys panic. Don't worry, Sesshoumaru's disappearance isn't sinister...I don't think anyone could have plucked him out from under Inuyasha and Miroku's noses quite so easily, especially without him making SOMETHING of a fuss. Depressed he may be - wanting to be recaptured he is not. And he might be in something of a physically weakened state, but he could at least peep and let them know that he was being absconded with. XD I'm sorry to worry y'all.

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Sesshoumaru had never felt so awkward within the walls of his own home, not even on the night he had learned his Lord Father was gone and he was suddenly no longer the Prince of the Western Lands, but the Lord. He had felt so young, so insecure, so unprepared.

Now he felt small again in the familiar hallways. He was grateful that there were no familiar faces. Injured as he was, he still knew the castle well enough to avoid being seen by the guards before he slid into his personal chambers.

A long, shuddering sigh escaped him as he caught sight of himself in the long, full-length mirror. He fought back the urge to cringe. His hair was dull and in terrible tangles. Scars and healing wounds covered him, although many were starting to fade. The terrible, wrapped-up collar around his neck proclaimed his failure and the fact he had been dominated almost as loudly as the angry red scar - the scar that would not fade with time, on the junction of his neck and shoulder. And part of his chest and collarbone - damn Tsetsukosei and his uncountable teeth! He was clad in a dirty, entirely whorish set of thin white silks. And his eyes...Sesshoumaru looked away with an unintentional whine tearing itself from his throat.

Sesshoumaru whirled about, eyes covering his room madly. He picked up a small but heavy marble statue and hurled it at the mirror. The glass exploded on impact, several shards clinging stubbornly to the frame as the rest fell to the floor in a glittering pile. Sesshoumaru was unable to stop the tremor running through his body. He clutched his hands into fists tightly and squeezed his eyes shut, trying to calm his rapid breathing. His instincts were screaming at him to flee... // From myself?... //

He felt his horror mounting, panic starting to claw at his stomach and crawl up his spine. This loss of control terrified him. This broken, used, claimed THING reflected a thousand times in the broken glass was not him! No!

Sesshoumaru forced himself to take a deep breath as he sank to the floor, leaning heavily against the wall. He pulled his knees up tightly to his chest and rested his forehead on them. Slowly he composed himself, his breathing evening out and his muscles relaxing. // No...I will....I will not act like a... a scared puppy...I will not. //

Steeling himself in his resolve, Sesshoumaru slowly got back to his feet. He headed resolutely to his closet and eyed his usual selection of clothing. Somehow, he couldn't bring himself to touch it. // White... is not such a good color on one such as I, is it?... // With a snarl at the offending silks, he dug into the depths of his closet and withdrew something.

Sesshoumaru stalked towards a door in the far end of his chambers. The main door flew open and Inuyasha entered so abruptly he nearly bowled over his elder brother. "Sesshoumaru!"

The taiyoukai stared at him expressionlessly for a long moment, waiting for him to continue.

"What are y...jeez, you had Miroku and I worried."

"I'm sorry that my attempt to rectify my poor personal hygiene of late is a cause for concern."

Inuyasha blinked a few times. "Oh...well...just don't walk off like that...you coulda said something."

"I was unaware that I had to answer to you in my own home."

Inuyasha smirked a bit. "I haven't turned the Lordship back over to you yet."

Sesshoumaru's head dropped, his long bangs hiding his eyes and his expression from his brother. His voice was rough, strained. "I don't want it."

Inuyasha blinked. "Come on, you aren't serious. I can't do half the lord stuff you did. If Miroku wasn't helping me with the paperwork this place probably would have fallen apart! You were the one that was supposed t--"

"I don't want it. I don't believe I'll be staying."

Inuyasha blinked. "Huh? What d...you can't leave. You've lived here all your life!"

Sesshoumaru bit back a snarl. Why couldn't he understand?! Why must he explain everything?! Didn't Inuyasha see?! He could never rule, not like this! He was claimed and subjugated, and they would laugh...they would revel in his weakness, and they would take such delight in tearing him down. No, if his lands...his FATHER'S lands...were to survive, he must have nothing to do with them.

Inuyasha frowned. "You aren't going anywhere."

"You cannot order this Sesshoumaru."

"Actually, since you aren't taking back your title, I outrank you. So I can. And I forbid you to leave the castle."

Sesshoumaru's gaze snapped to Inuyasha, his eyes widening in surprise. Inuyasha still felt uneasy seeing such naked emotions displayed on his brother's face - he was so used to the icy, impassive mask and untouchable demeanor his brother had always worn. Sesshoumaru was silent for a long time before his determination and rage melted almost visibly under Inuyasha's stare. "As you will."

// Huh? He's gonna do what I say? // Inuyasha abruptly felt guilty for ordering Sesshoumaru to do anything. "Sessh..."

"If it pleases MY LORD..." Sesshoumaru said icily, "...this Sesshoumaru would like to take a bath."

Inuyasha frowned deeper. "Sessh, I'm sorry. I just...I'm worried if you leave you'll..."

"Get hurt? Taken? Killed? Hn. This Sesshoumaru understands. I cannot protect myself, so I need my half-breed brother to do it. I am too weak." His words came out far more bitter than he had intended, and worse - he knew they were true.

"Oh, come on. You're recovering from a hell of a beating. You'll get better and be able to kick the shit out of everything soon. At least stick around until you're better. And you have to anyways, because I have to take you to Kagome to see if we can get that stupid collar off, unless you know a way."

"If I knew a way, do you think I would still be wearing it?"

"Um. Probably not."

"Inuyasha..."

Inuyasha blinked. "Yeah?"

"Me. Bath. NOW. "

The hanyou grinned sheepishly. "Eh. Yeah, yeah. Go on. And then will you come to dinner? I figure we can leave for Kagome's time in the morning."

Sesshoumaru was silent for a long moment before nodding his consent - otherwise, he feared he'd never be rid of the hanyou. Inuyasha left, and Sesshoumaru sighed before heading off to clean up.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku and Inuyasha were alone in the dining hall so long that they almost thought Sesshoumaru wasn't coming. Several times, the monk had urged Inuyasha to just give Sesshoumaru his space. Inuyasha was fretting and worrying that his brother would do 'something stupid'. Miroku didn't have to ask what Inuyasha meant. He was starting to worry if maybe he'd been wrong in stalling his hanyou friend when the door opened. Both of them turned to look at Sesshoumaru. Both of them couldn't help but stare.

The taiyoukai was dressed in dark black silk that had far less flare than anything Inuyasha or Miroku had ever seen him in. A silver design threaded across the black material. Sesshoumaru's hair was pulled up from his neck and bound with a black cord. A few rogue strands framed his face on either side. An empty sword belt hung at his waist, and his golden eyes flickered to Inuyasha. "You will tell this Sesshoumaru where his swords are."

Inuyasha blinked several times. Sesshoumaru looked so much like the images he had seen of their father. He finally managed to speak after a few false starts. "Sure, Sessh...I have Tenseiga with me, actually..." So saying, he handed over the blade. "Can it wait until after dinner? We ordered it a while ago but they were waiting for you to bring it out."

The taiyoukai paused for a moment and then nodded. He abruptly sat down, and Inuyasha frowned. He had purposely left the seat at the head of the table empty, but his brother made no move for it. With a sigh, the hanyou resigned himself to remaining - temporary - Lord of the West, and sat down.

Dinner was a silent affair, at least on Sesshoumaru's part. His appetite, after he had eaten so heavily in the forests, was less voracious and he slid into the comforting auto-pilot of routine Miroku and Inuyasha talked amongst themselves. They made several attempts to draw Sesshoumaru into the conversation, but the taiyoukai didn't buy into any of them.

Sesshoumaru abruptly spoke towards the end of the meal, startling both of them. "I wish to get this collar removed now. I do not wish to remain the night."

Inuyasha shrugged. "Alright, if that's what you want...Eager to see Rin?"

The hanyou regretted saying that almost the moment it left his mouth. Sesshoumaru froze, his face blank. He slowly set down the bite he had been about to take, his eyes downcast. His voice cracked when he spoke. "No. Gods, no..."

Inuyasha was shocked. "S...Sessh..."

"I will not....have HER see me like this..." The thought of Rin seeing him so broken and defeated...the thought of even the slightest hint of doubt stealing past the devotion in which she typically regarded him...the tiniest thought that she might have a lesser opinion of him...it made his heart ache. He tried to mentally chastise himself that the opinion of a human shouldn't mean so much to him...but that little voice that had always so strongly dictated his life and kept him as the powerful, immaculate Lord Sesshoumaru had had its vocal cords torn until it was no more than a distant, powerless whisper in light of his ordeal.

"Sessh...nothing could make that girl think any less of you. You know th..." Inuyasha stopped at the angry, wounded glare his brother gave him. Sesshoumaru stood abruptly and whipped about, stalking to the door.

"I shall be ready to depart within the hour. See that you do the same."

Inuyasha sighed heavily - when would he learn to stop saying things to unintentionally hurt his brother? "Yeah...I will be."


	16. Chapter 15

Pride (In the Name of Love) 15 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I may not be able to update tomorrow, as I have to work a long shift and may be too tired when I get home in the morning (I work nights). So I'll post this chapter early. =D I can't respond to individual reviews from my email, but I do so love receiving them. If anyone ever has any questions, feel free to drop me a line.

I also am starting an update list. Anyone that wants to be added to said update list, just drop me a line at my email listed above and I'll mail chapters to you directly as soon as they're ready to go! This story is probably going to be long...possibly a series, or I may just keep it as one story. Eventually it'll branch out and involve other characters more heavily...so I'll probly make it a set of stories rather than just one. Anyhow, here's the chapter. I'll update again tomorrow if I have the energy!

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The journey to the Bone Eater's Well didn't take as long as Inuyasha had originally thought it would, although he wished it had. Sesshoumaru drove himself far beyond his limits, and Inuyasha hadn't even realized it because his brother never said a word or gave any sign that their pace was too fast - indeed, he had set the pace himself.

The hanyou learned that his brother wasn't quite as ready for this as he gave the appearance of being when Sesshoumaru abruptly stumbled forward, rolling head over heels from momentum and crashing into a tree, not moving. Inuyasha let out a yelp of surprise, skidding forcefully to a stop and hurrying over. Sesshoumaru's breathing was ragged and his eyes were rolling, unfocused. "Fuck...Sessh, you IDIOT!"

Sesshoumaru didn't answer, his muscles quivering from strain. Inuyasha just couldn't understand...he NEEDED this collar off...damn his body for not being up to traveling properly...// So...damn...helpless!... //

Inuyasha sighed when he noticed Sesshoumaru's consciousness slip away. "Guess we camp here for the night. I should have known you weren't up for this. I'm just so damn used to you being stronger than me..." The hanyou sighed as he arranged his brother in a more comfortable position and started a small fire, leaning back against a tree. He generally preferred to be up in said tree, but then he wouldn't be able to keep as close an eye on his brother.

The night passed uneventfully. Sesshoumaru was awake when Inuyasha woke up, although his brother hadn't moved and simply lay on his back, staring up at the gray, pre-dawn sky. Inuyasha eyed him for a long moment. "Er...good morning, Sessh."

Sesshoumaru's eyes flicked in Inuyasha's direction, but that was all the acknowledgment he bothered to give his brother's greeting. Inuyasha's ears slicked back in annoyance.

"Damn it, Sessh, I'm doing everything I can to try to help you and you're being so fucking difficult..."

Sesshoumaru's response was robotic, flat, and automatic. "Then stop. I did not ask for your help."

Inuyasha growled. "Sorry, can't do that. I'm not into abandoning my family when they need me. Whether or not they want to admit it."

"So we're close family now..."

"Fuck...Sesshoumaru, I am TRYING. I set aside all my anger at you...and fuck, you better believe I had plenty of it. And I'm starting to realize that a lot of it was...I dunno. You never really hated me, did you?"

"I did."

Inuyasha blinked and then narrowed his eyes.

"I blamed you for my Lord Father's death. I hated you for having human blood. For tainting the family line with human weakness and shaming our House. For these things, I did hate you. I learned you were not weak, and I learned to accept that you are not responsible for my Lord Father's death. I released my hatred. This Sesshoumaru learns from his mistakes."

"So...you want to try a real like...brother relationship?"

Sesshoumaru sat up slowly, emotionless eyes flicking to his brother. "I do not know what you expect of me."

Inuyasha frowned - he didn't have much idea either, but he was damn well going to come up with something. "Y'know, brother stuff..."

Sesshoumaru slowly raised one eyebrow, waiting for more of an explanation. Inuyasha scowled, flustered at being put on the spot. "Meh...come on. We're almost to the well. I warn ya, the place is gonna overwhelm you. It's loud, the smells are...confusing, at best...and just...different than anything you can imagine. There's all this...this...techomaloggy stuff everywhere. A lot of it has to be magic, but Kagome insists its not. And you have to at least TRY to not draw obvious attention. Hide the ears and whatnot."

In response, Sesshoumaru yanked the tie from his hair and let it fall to its typical loose state, his ears vanishing behind a curtain of silver.

"Keh. You got it easy, I have to wear a stupid hat. Although I don't have stripes to worry about...but you wouldn't be the first tattooed human I'd seen." Inuyasha grumbled a bit and got up before offering Sesshoumaru his hand to help him up too. Sesshoumaru eyed his hand contemplatively for a minute before accepting it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru stopped next to the well and gave Inuyasha a very serious look, speaking for the first time since they'd set off that morning. The silence hadn't been terribly uncomfortable or oppressive - neither of them had anything to say and Sesshoumaru, even before the incident, had never been much of an idle conversationalist. "Inuyasha."

"Yeah?"

"I...I meant it. I do not want to see Rin."

"You mean you don't want her to see you."

Sesshoumaru favored his brother with a brief glare. Inuyasha sighed. "You know how much she'd like to see you, though. Shit, Sessh, that girl worships the ground you walk on. She'd crawl through a mile of broken glass to lick the feet of the last person lucky enough to touch you."

Sesshoumaru's pain was evident and he clenched his fists tightly. His voice was terse and strained. "And that is exactly why she cannot see me like this. I do not...want to be anything less."

Inuyasha sighed - his brother just didn't understand. "Sessh, the kid loves you. Love doesn't work that way. It's not all about looking good or the show you can put on."

"She's hardly a child now," Sesshoumaru muttered. Inuyasha blinked, then stared at his brother in dawning comprehension.

"Heyyy... I'm starting to get the impression...you love her, don't you?"

"If you wish to keep your tongue, you should cease its ignorant wagging, hanyou."

Inuyasha grinned ear to ear. "Well well...who woulda thought. And you're right, she's borderline adult. I've seen plenty of girls her age already married off and whatnot. I..." Inuyasha stopped dead before looking at his brother with wide eyes. "I saw that mark you gave her! Does that mean you two...er..."

"It will be most difficult to have a proper brotherly relationship if I kill you, Inuyasha. In answer to your question, no. I have not mated with the girl. I claimed her as my own to offer her some protection from other youkai in the absence of my presence."

"So you're going to take her as your mate someday?"

Sesshoumaru growled low in his throat. "This conversation ends now."

Inuyasha smirked, almost twitching from the desire to continue prodding his brother about it. "Alright, fine. But are you sure you don't want to see her? Last time I saw her she was hugging that fluffy thing of y--"

"Mokomoko-sama."

Inuyasha blinked slowly, then blinked again. "Er. Yeah. That thing...she was hugging it like it was the only thing keeping her floating in the middle of the ocean. She's been devastated since you were gone." Inuyasha looked at the floor, somewhat guilty. "She...spent every night sneaking out of her room and just staring at your bedroom door. She was waiting. She was th...she was the only one that didn't believe you were dead. I...we felt so bad because she was so...I dunno...so bad off, I agreed to look into things and figure out what killed you or if you were still alive."

Sesshoumaru paused, a frown etching his features. He closed his eyes and sighed, his heart twisting at the unintentional grief he had caused the little human that meant too much to him. "Fine. I will...see her."

Inuyasha grinned. "Good. She'd be crushed to find out you were there and didn't say hi, y'know. We...we tried not to tell her...anything about...well. Anything. She knows you were...hurt, but thats about it."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Let us go. I am eager to get rid of this damnable thing." He flicked the collar in annoyance.

"Alright, hang on to me," Inuyasha said with a grin before hopping into the well.

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened significantly almost as soon as they reached the other side of the well. Inuyasha hadn't lied about the smells being overpowering and confusing, that was for sure! Inuyasha gave him a long glance. "Um...you'll have to leave your swords here." He had to speak hastily to counter the dire glare sent his way. "Look, Sessh, that kinda thing...er...they don't allow people to walk around armed in this time. No one comes here, anyways. I promise you they'll be safe."

With extreme reluctance, the taiyoukai unfastened his sword belt and hid it amidst some of the boxes being stored nearby. "Fine. Can we go?"

Inuyasha grinned as he tugged on the hat he left here. "Sure...I should show you this thing Kagome calls a 'bus' but I don't have any money."

"This Sesshoumaru has plenty. So do you. A large trust in your name is within our family's treasury."

"Eh, humans don't take gold."

Sesshoumaru looked at him as if he had said fish didn't swim in the water anymore. "..."

"They have mostly paper with all sorts of colorful pictures on it that represents gold that they got in some hidden treasury."

Sesshoumaru scowled. "That's ridiculous. They accept paper that represents gold they do not actually possess, but will not take actual gold in trade?"

"Heh. Your gold is worth a whole lot more than their paper. Gold is worth plenty, but you'd have to sell it for their paper-gold stuff. And it'd take more time than its worth. Kagome's place isn't far."

Whatever Sesshoumaru was expecting, it was not anything like the city that greeted his eyes. He stared in shock at everything, trying to take in all the sights and sounds. His hands twitched reflexively near his where his sword should be - too many things looked as though they could be a potential threat. Lights and colors flashed everywhere. Buildings shot up into the sky. The ground was mostly covered with some sort of odd stone. Smells, ranging from sickeningly sweet to downright disgusting and almost all unidentifiable assaulted his sensitive nose.

Inuyasha delighted in his brother's culture-shock for a moment, understanding completely what he was going through. It hadn't been any easier for him to get used to. However, some of the passers-by on the sidewalk were starting to take an interest in his brother.

Inuyasha really couldn't blame the girls for staring. Even when he wasn't wearing his more fancy clothing, his brother was still gorgeous, all lean lines and slender angles. His hair was of course immaculate again after it had been properly tended to. The only thing taking away from his pristine beauty was the not-so-pretty rubber-wrapped collar at his throat.

Sesshoumaru's eyes abruptly flicked to the girls that had begun gathering nearby and were whispering to each other and looking at him. They giggled at being noticed and the tone of their whispers became more excited. Sesshoumaru glanced at his brother. "What is wrong with those humans? Is it so readily apparent that I am youkai?"

Inuyasha smirked. "Nah, the just think you're hot."

"Why would they assume such a thing? It is not that warm."

The hanyou smirked - he had picked up more than a few colloquialisms from Kagome in their time together. "Not like overheated. I mean like...good-looking. Sexy. Desirable. Pounce-worthy."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrow hiked to his hairline as his brother spoke. "And you share this opinion?"

Inuyasha gaped like a landed fish, his face immediately flaming a bright red. He tried to speak several times but failed. It took a while for him to actually force words out. "Wh...What?! I didn't s-say that..."

"So you do not find me attractive." Sesshoumaru frowned slightly.

"Shit, Sessh, you're gorgeous, alright? Entirely lust-worthy. Can we go now?"

The dark voice whispered in Sesshoumaru's mind that he was far from attractive...no one could want him. He was dirty, tainted, unclean...used and subjugated. Claimed.

But despite the knotting in the pit of his stomach as he considered those dark words and believed them...he couldn't help but feel an odd little rush of amusement and interest at his brother's unintentional admission. In some weird, minor way...it made him feel better.

Inuyasha noted the conflicting series of emotions rapid-firing through his brother's eyes. He was pleased to note that, while the despair was still evident, for a moment at least it had lifted and the tiniest of smirks had graced his lips. // Better than nothing, I suppose. // Before he could contemplate the unexpected turn their conversation had - or think too much about what he had said - he snatched Sesshoumaru's hand and headed off towards Kagome's apartment.


	17. Chapter 16

Pride (In the Name of Love) 16 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mm. I wasn't planning on writing a chapter today...long night at work and all. But here it is anyways. If it is substandard to my usual, forgive me, for I am sleepy. Zzzzz....

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Rin yawned, poking at the television remote and snuggling back contentedly into Mokomoko-sama. Kagome returned to the living room a minute later with a couple sandwiches - peanut butter and jelly. Rin squealed in delight at the new food and munched it carefully. Her time here so far had been an amazing learning experience.

Kagome had treated her like a sister. They went to a place called a 'mall' where Kagome got Rin some new clothes and some make-up. They had gotten their hair done, and Rin now had a few pairs of earrings too. Everything in this world was so new and exciting!

Kagome, for the most part, was glad that experiencing her world was so distracting for the younger girl. Rin had been very upset and quiet for the first day or two of her stay. It hadn't taken long for Kagome to draw her back to her usual, hyper and overly-cheerful self.

The only dark point had been when Kagome had gently tried to get Rin to leave Mokomoko-sama behind. She had feared for a moment that the girl would actually attack her if she tried to lay a finger on it - she hadn't realized Rin possessed such a fierce glare and hadn't expected her to take up a defensive posture. The issue hadn't been brought up again.

Kagome got up when she heard a knock at the door and headed to see who it was. She was more than a little surprised to see Inuyasha. "Inuyasha!"

Inuyasha grinned slightly and returned the emphatic hug he abruptly became the victim of. "Heya, Kagome...how are things?"

"They're fine. Rin's been great company. How are things on y our end?"

Inuyasha fidgeted a bit. "Er...well...that's sorta why I'm here. We kinda need your help."

Kagome blinked. "We?..."

Inuyasha stepped back and glanced down the hall a little ways. Kagome peeked her head out the door and her jaw practically hit the floor as she let out a strangled squeak at the unexpected sight of Sesshoumaru.

"Y...you brought him here?!"

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed a bit. "I can get by without your aid, miko." He abruptly turned on his heel. Inuyasha scowled and hurried over to intercept him.

"Kagome, don't worry about it. You know I wouldn't endanger you. And we don't know how to get this collar thing off. I was hoping you'd have some sort of...y'know, future thing...that could deal with it. Sessh can't go around forever with it on. "

"Alright...I...I'm sorry. I guess I over-reacted. I was...surprised. Last time I saw you..."

"I was most probably endeavoring to harm my brother, yes. Things change."

Kagome frowned a bit. His voice wasn't quite as imperial as she remembered, and there was something infinitely sad and broken about his eyes. They were dull. He carried himself as if he was simply resigned to his fate and was not doing any thing out of a desire to do it, but merely because the situation was in front of him. "Come in. I'll bet Rin will be happy to see you..."

Sesshoumaru flinched and froze mid-step, as if the prospect of seeing the girl was something he desperately wanted to avoid. Inuyasha gave him a nudge (which earned him a icy glare) and the taiyoukai straightened his spine and strode into the room.

It only took him a split second to locate Rin and he paused to examine her, blinking slowly. Rin was dressed in a form-fitting pair of light blue jeans and a dark blue, silky shirt that hung off her shoulders. Her hair was done up somewhat elaborately, carefully pinned and styled. He blinked slowly, carefully filing the mental image away as a smile twitched his lips. She was curled up contentedly with his mokomoko.

Sesshoumaru's smile turned to a slightly mischievous smirk. Inuyasha and Kagome glanced at each other and shrugged.

Rin hadn't noticed them re-enter the room, though she blinked when the end of Mokomoko lifted and brushed ticklishly across the back of her neck. She pushed it away absently, still watching the strange picture-box on a table across the room.

Mokomoko rubbed against her neck again, while the other end slithered around to tickle her stomach. Rin blinked and giggled, pushing at the furry length. "What are you doing, Mokomoko-sama? This is the first time you've moved on your own...behave."

Sesshoumaru couldn't help but smirk at his ward's attempt at a stern, chastising tone. With another thought from the taiyoukai, his mokomoko abruptly curled around the girl and plucked her off the couch. Rin let out a surprised shriek as she was turned around and set down. Her shriek turned into a sharp cry. "Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Inuyasha hadn't realized humans could fly, but he found himself revising that opinion when he saw Rin launch herself at Sesshoumaru from across the room. She hurled her arms around Sesshoumaru's waist and hugged him tightly. Sesshoumaru blinked slowly and then hesitantly rested his hand on her head. "Rin."

"Oh, Lord Sesshoumaru, I was so worried!" The tears in her big brown eyes tugged at the taiyoukai's heart and he absently flicked them away. Rin blushed at the motion, before looking up at him. "What is that?"

Sesshoumaru frowned deeply as he realized she referred to his collar. "It is nothing. I am here to have it removed." The taiyoukai paused, slowly reaching out to trail his fingers through the thick furry length of his mokomoko. "I see you have taken good care of this. This Sesshoumaru is grateful."

Rin nodded vehemently. "Oh yes. I brushed him and pet him and made sure nothing hurt him." Rin's gaze caught sight of Sesshoumaru's long and slender...and clawless...fingers. "Lord Sesshoumaru, where are your claws?"

The taiyoukai turned his back abruptly, not answering her. His voice was tight as he looked at Kagome. "You will make arrangements that I may have this removed immediately?"

Kagome nodded. "Yes...I don't really know who to call but there has to be someone in the phone book..."

Sesshoumaru nodded and, before anyone could stop him, he strode out to the balcony and leapt up to the roof.

Rin blinked, looking somewhat stung. "Sesshoumaru-sama is angry and hurt...Rin is sorry."

Inuyasha grinned half-heartedly. "Eh, it's not your fault, kid. He's just...really sensitive about some things right now. He was in a bad place and got very hurt. He's still sensitive about a lot of things. You know how...prideful...he is, you have to."

Rin nodded slightly, still looking dreadfully upset for her lord.

"Well, his pride got destroyed. You don't...." Inuyasha sighed. "Don't blame yourself. Watching him tease you a minute ago is the first time I've seen him smile in...maybe ever. He's not trying to upset you, he's just having a hard time dealing with things. Alright? Just...try and help take care of him, but don't make it obvious. If he thinks we're pitying him it'll just hurt his pride worse."

Meanwhile, Kagome had been flipping through the phone book and making some calls. "Alright, I found a metalsmith willing to take a look at that collar. I already warned him that it has a pretty stout electrical current in it, but he said he had some laser cutting tools that should work without him having to actually touch it."

Inuyasha blinked, his ears twitching. "Er...well, shit, as long as it works I don't care how he does it. "

"Lord Inuyasha?"

"Yeah, kid?"

"Now that Sesshoumaru-sama is going to be home again, will you be staying with us? Oh, please say you will!"

Inuyasha blinked. "Heh, it's more like...Sessh is staying with me. He's letting me be Lord for a while while he...er...takes a break and recovers. So yeah, I'll be sticking around."

Rin beamed in delight. "That's wonderful!" She blinked. "Oh! I should have given Sesshoumaru-sama Mokomoko-sama back...!"

"You've got time, kid."

Kagome stared at Inuyasha. "So you're REALLY going to do this whole...brotherly love thing? And Sesshoumaru is too?"

Inuyasha nodded seriously. "Yeah, we're gonna give it a go. He's...I have a lot to learn about my brother. And a lot to relearn. And..." Inuyasha paused, but Rin seemed to have become distracted by the television again. The hanyou lowered his voice. "He needs me, Kagome. Or someone. And there aren't a lot of volunteers. If I leave him alone I'm afraid he'll kill himself."

"He's really that bad? Sesshoumaru, suicidal?"

"You didn't see what that bastard did to him."

"I'm glad. You might want to get him if we're going to make our appointment. Its going to be expensive...and I don't know how to explain Sesshoumaru's more...er...inhuman features. So it's probably going to cost extra."

"Well, Sessh has a nice little sack of gold hidden in that haori of his somewhere. Couple coins and you'll have more than enough of your paper money stuff with extra. Though he was a bit miffed he couldn't pay for bus fare with it."

Kagome giggled at the thought. "Oh dear...Rin, hun?"

Rin blinked. "Yes, Lady Kagome?"

"Do you think you could call Sesshoumaru so we can get going?"

"Sure!" Rin immediately bounced out to the balcony. "Lord Sesshoumaru! Lady Kagome says it is time to leave!"

The taiyoukai dropped to the balcony wordlessly a moment later. Rin caught his sleeve shyly and he turned, slowly arching one elegant eyebrow.

"I ... need to give you Mokomoko-sama back."

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. "Thank you, Rin." The girl beamed as the warm, furry length of the mokomoko uncurled from her and slithered its way back to Sesshoumaru. She felt briefly disoriented as it separated from her, but it passed quickly. Sesshoumaru, on the other hand, was much more deeply affected, letting out a contented sigh and resting his head against it, eyes slipping shut. Rin couldn't help but grin wider at the sight of so much obvious contentment on her beloved Lord's face - he wasn't one to show such emotions!

Sesshoumaru seemed to remember this fact a moment later and his expression snapped to a purely impassive, unaffected gaze with the flick of some internal switch. Rin almost giggled at how quickly he switched gears, but she knew better. Before they joined the others to head out the door, Sesshoumaru paused and looked Rin over. "These future clothes...suit you." Without another word, he strode forward.

Rin blushed deeply, her heart suddenly pounding in her chest. After all, it wasn't every day one got admired by Lord Sesshoumaru, let alone complimented! Feeling as warm and fuzzy as she had when she had curled up with mokomoko, she quickly fell into step in her usual place behind Sesshoumaru as they rejoined Inuyasha and Kagome, heading out the door.


	18. Chapter 17

Pride (In the Name of Love) 17 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Well...I first want to state that I'm trying to keep in character, but there may be SOME deviation here...take it as artistic license or development due to what has gone before or as you will. I had FUN with this chapter....

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Kagome realized that this was going to be a VERY long trip almost as soon as they left the apartment building. Inuyasha found ways to draw less attention to himself and generally was glanced at and then over.

Sesshoumaru made no attempt to blend in. He drew stares like honey draws flies. Despite his trauma, he unconsciously carried himself with an air of regality. He held his head high and gave the world his typical, icy stare. His long silver hair swished behind him. And if his incredible and highly unusual good looks and simple force of his presence weren't enough, his clothing was archaic and expensive. And of course, there was his mokomoko curled around him and trailing behind him. Rin was following him in her typical fashion - two steps back and one to the right.

Everyone was staring and taking note of him. Kagome prayed things wouldn't get any worse than stares.

Her hopes were futile.

Kagome led the group to the bus stop, as the metallurgist they were going to see was a bit too far to make walking expedient. It was early morning and they hadn't yet seen any vehicles.

When the bus suddenly pulled into view, Sesshoumaru leaped back in alarm as it headed for them and moved to shield Rin even as she scrambled behind him. Inuyasha blinked when he realized his brother intended fully to attack the metal monstrosity as it neared them. He quickly hurried over. "Sessh, relax, that's the bus."

"It is coming right for us! What manner of beast is it? Do you mean to say it is not hostile?"

"Er...its not alive. And its not an animal. Its a cart that moves around by itself and carries people."

Sesshoumaru glared at the bus suspiciously as it stopped, twitching back to a defensive posture as he heard the whoosh of air releasing as the brakes were engaged. However, when Kagome and Inuyasha both got on the bus, and Rin looked at him questioningly and trustingly - after all, SHE would NEVER do something Sesshoumaru didn't think was a good idea - Sesshoumaru nodded slightly and climbed up the steps.

The ride wasn't very long, but it was clear that the taiyoukai was very tense, his senses straining to signal out potential threats in this strange environment. He unconsciously made sure Rin was safely behind him at all times.

The metallurgist's shop was noisy and full of overpowering smells, even to the humans. Inuyasha wrinkled his nose and sneezed several times. Sesshoumaru's expression was one of disdain and disgust, although he was far more subtle about it than his brother. Kagome found the shop's owner and waved.

The metalworker put down his soldering iron and took off his mask, standing up and brushing some dust free of his heavy apron. He walked over, initially focused on Kagome although his eyes gravitated to the figure of her taiyoukai companion. "Er...hi, you the girl I spoke with on the phone?"

Kagome nodded politely. "Yes...and this is my friend with the problem."

The man slowly raised an eyebrow as he regarded Sesshoumaru, his eyes trailing over the demon lord curiously and pausing when they settled on the collar. "Hm. Tilt your head back, let me see your neck."

Sesshoumaru's reaction was immediate and violent. He surged forward, snatching the man by the throat and slamming him against the wall, growling dangerously and baring his fangs. His claws may have been removed, but his voice still dripped venom. "This Sesshoumaru bares his throat for no one!"

Inuyasha blinked, catching on a moment too late. "Shit!"

Kagome tried very hard not to flail. "Sesshoumaru! Let him go! What t--" Inuyasha abruptly clamped a hand over her mouth to silence her before hurrying over to his brother and the panicking metallurgist.

"Sessh...let him go, you need him to help you. He's not challenging you, he just wants to see the collar..."

Sesshoumaru eyed his brother dangerously but slowly let the man down before inclining his head slightly. The panicking man, however, wasn't terribly interested in examining the collar at the moment. Kagome blushed viciously and headed over to try and calm him down.

"Look...this is going to be impossible to explain...just...lets get this over with as quickly as possible and I promise, I'll make it worth your while. I brought...a lot more money than what you would typically charge."

The man was obviously weighing greed against his nervous fear. He slowly relaxed, seeing as how Sesshoumaru didn't seem to be making any more moves to assault him. He grumbled but began digging through some of his tools. "Nn...fine...get your friend to take a seat and I'll be over in a minute."

Kagome nodded and they headed across the room. Sesshoumaru scowled at the folding chair as if simply touching it was beneath him before reluctantly sitting down. Kagome edged closer to Inuyasha. "Inuyasha...what the hell was that all about...?"

Inuyasha flushed. "Heh. In canine youkai...hell, even in canines in your world...showing throat is a sign of submission. As you can imagine, thats not something that'd sit well with my brother even under normal circumstances..."

"Oh..." Kagome blushed, then frowned. "Hmm. So that collar is...extra degrading, isn't it..." Inuyasha nodded solemnly.

Having found what he was looking for, the metalsmith walked over. "So you're tellin' me that you somehow wound up with some highly charged shock collar stuck around your neck...that's permanently on...and I have to cut it off. And if I touch it, I'll probably get fried."

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed slightly but he nodded once. He did not like this human's irreverent, disdainful tone.

"...Man, you're a weird one. I don't even want to know what kind of shit you're into to end up in this situation."

Inuyasha grabbed the man before Sesshoumaru could, sensing his brother's volatile mood. "Look, man. We're paying you out the ass. Just do the job and don't ask questions. My brother's got a temper and I don't want to see anyone get hurt."

The man grumbled before donning some heavy rubber gloves and untying the straps of the collar's wrapping. He examined it carefully before nodding. "I should be able to get it off. I have some laser cutting tools. I'll just have to go slow so I don't burn you. This is kinda...y'know, fucking dangerous."

"This Sesshoumaru will heal if you burn me. Just get the damn thing off," the taiyoukai growled impatiently.

It proved to be a more difficult task than they had previously thought, and the going was incredibly slow. Sesshoumaru displayed perfect restraint and never so much as twitched. When the outer edge of the collar was breached, a violent sizzle of blue-white sparks crackled along the exposed edges - apparently, the collar's power was still very much intact.

The metal proved inflexible and so two cuts had to be made. When the second was finally finished, the metalworker very carefully separated the two viciously crackling halves. With the current broken, they finally sparked their last and fell quiescent.

The collar was off.

Sesshoumaru clamped his hand to his neck with an audible noise of relief, his eyes closing. He felt a sudden surge as his youki coiled within him, no longer sealed off and inaccessible. He eyed the metalsmith reluctantly. "You...have this Sesshoumaru's gratitude." He stood up, eyeing the half-circles of rune-carved metal laying on the floor, a snarl twitching his lips.

Kagome paid the man - paid him extremely well for both the work and to keep his mouth shut - and headed back to the group. They walked out of the building to head back to her apartment. "So...will you be...staying for a while?"

"No," came the immediate response from Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha sighed.

"We can't. Got a lot of business to take care of back home."

"Rin."

"Yes, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

"You will remain here a while longer. It is not yet safe for you to return until my enemy has been dealt with." Rin looked a little crestfallen but nodded anyway.

"Of course, Sesshoumaru-sama. When your enemy is gone, can I come back home too?"

"Yes, Rin." The girl beamed.

"Alright! Do you mind terribly that I'm staying with you, Lady Kagome?"

Kagome chuckled. "Not at all, its like having a sister!"

Sesshoumaru reached into a fold of his kimono and withdrew a leather pouch. He tossed it to Kagome, who scrambled to catch it before it dropped.

"What is...oh!" Kagome peered into the bag. It was filled with ancient gold coins, worth a small fortune. "Sesshoumaru, I can't acc--"

"This Sesshoumaru does not accept charity and will not remain in debt to a human."

Kagome recognized in Sesshoumaru the same stubborn defiance she was used to seeing in Inuyasha, albeit a more refined, confident defiance. She also detected the very faint undertones of a threat - he was not about to take no for an answer. "Well....thank you very much, Sesshoumaru."

The taiyoukai didn't bother to respond, merely looked away, focusing his attention elsewhere. The bus ride back to Kagome's apartment was much less dramatic and more peaceful than the one earlier that same day.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Freedom. Oh, glorious freedom...

For the first time since he had first been collared, Sesshoumaru finally felt as if he had escaped. With the collar off, the livid red scar of Tsetsukosei's bite was far more obvious against the taiyoukai's pale skin, but at the moment, Sesshoumaru did not care. He felt as if a tremendous weight had been lifted from him. And now, reunited with his mokomoko and in full possession of his youki and Rin at his side, he almost felt normal.

Almost.

The dark whispers in the back of his mind continued to reinforce his doubts and his lack of self-worth. After all, was not the bite scar as clear a mark of subjugation as the collar had been? All that saw him would know that he had been reduced to another's whore.

"Lord Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru blinked out of his dark thoughts, glancing at his ward. "Yes, Rin?"

"You have to come see this, Lord Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru allowed the girl to lead the way across Kagome's apartment with the resigned look of someone who has been led to see great and wonderful things - in Rin's opinion - many, many times. Rin led him to the kitchen and pointed to the sink. "Look!"

The taiyoukai peered at the metal basin and slowly arched one delicate eyebrow. Rin beamed and flipped the handle, turning on the water. Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and he couldn't help himself but take a few steps closer.

"And look, I can make it warm too!" Rin demonstrated her mastery of the sink to Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai struggled to hide his intrigue. Inuyasha and Kagome both suppressed smirks and snickers.

Rin proceeded to show Sesshoumaru the further awes of indoor plumbing - shower included, electrical lighting, the refrigerator, the television, central air, the radio, reclining chairs, the microwave, canned food, telephones, mass-published books, alarm clocks - an endless list of common modern technology and objects. Sesshoumaru forgot to be stoic and disinterested, which delighted Rin to no end and only made her that much more excited about revealing the secrets of this new world to him.

Even the food baffled him - Kagome had food from all parts of the world, many of which he'd never even heard of. He eyed a can of pineapple skeptically, sniffing at it. "This is edible?"

"No, the food is inside! I like these." Rin produced a can of peaches and triumphantly presented it to her Lord. Sesshoumaru picked up the can and gave another sniff, although it proved as ineffective as the first. It revealed nothing but the tang of metal and the faint odor of the glue holding the colorful label to the can.

"How do humans eat this?" He frowned at the can. Surely his fangs could rip through it, but that didn't explain how this made it simple for a human. How did they get the food in a metal shell anyway?...Especially since this world seemed to be all about convenience. It seemed a terribly difficult and impractical way of storing food. How did they keep it from rotting, too? Fruit didn't last long once it was picked!

Kagome was straining very hard not to giggle. Inuyasha nudged her to keep her quiet, content to sit with her and watch his brother be fascinated. He'd not been much different when he first came here.

"Watch!" Rin beamed and plucked the can from Sesshoumaru, bouncing over to the can opener and inserting the can. The little machine whirred, neatly taking the lid off of the can and holding it aloft with a little magnet. Sesshoumaru blinked, his mind whirling with questions. He was distracted from his thoughts, however, when Rin gave him a bowl of peaches to try. She then dug into something she called a 'freezer'. He had to touch it to believe it was as cold as she said.

Soon the taiyoukai had eaten bits and pieces of many different things he'd never heard of. He especially liked the 'ice cream' Rin had given him.

Inuyasha snickered a bit and nudged Kagome. "Those two are gonna eat you out of house and home with their experimenting."

Kagome snorted. "Inuyasha, the amount of money I can get from that bag of ancient gold your brother gave me could restock this place ten million times over. Let them have their fun."

"Eh, they can have all the fun they want. He just better not eat all my ice cream."

Sesshoumaru's hearing was apparently sharper than Inuyasha thought.

"This Sesshoumaru has claimed this box of iced cream. You shall have to find another." Sesshoumaru gave his spoon a satisfied lick. He liked this 'spoon'. Much easier to use than chopsticks.

Inuyasha blinked. "Oh, like hell you did!"

"Can Rin have some, Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Yes, Rin."

"Thank you!" Rin beamed adoringly at Sesshoumaru before taking a bite.

Inuyasha squinted at his brother. "Gimme that."

"No. It is mine."

"And Rin's."

"It is mine, but I allow you to have some."

Rin nodded in agreement before showing Sesshoumaru the wonder that was a pressurized can of whipped cream. Distracted by this new wonderful treat, and how well it went with his ice cream, Sesshoumaru almost missed his brother's attack.

Inuyasha found himself snagged mid-pounce by Sesshoumaru's mokomoko and held aloft. He snarled and kicked and tried to sink his teeth into the furry pseudo-appendage, but to no avail. "Hey! Lemme go!"

Sesshoumaru glanced at his brother, a spoonful of half-melted chocolate near his mouth. "No. You will try to take my iced cream."

"I'm the Lord now and I say you have to give it to me," Inuyasha declared with a smirk. Sesshoumaru paused, considering that as he savored a bite.

"It is true, you ARE Lord of the Western Lands."

Inuyasha nodded. "Damn straight."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "But we aren't in the Western Lands, so you have no right to order me. Would you like some more, Rin?"

Inuyasha howled and continued his futile struggle, and Kagome couldn't help but laugh until she almost cried.


	19. Chapter 18

Pride (In the Name of Love) 18 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - XD Glad you all liked the last chapter, the reviews made me happy. Figured I needed to lighten the mood a bit - its not ALL doom and gloom, after all. o.O There WILL be some happy endings at some point. Believe it or not, I'm a fan of them. Not...that I forsee an end for this any time soon....XD

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Inuyasha ended up sulking for a good long while. He had managed to escape mokomoko and abscond with the can of whipped cream, but Sesshoumaru was able to hold him off long enough for him and Rin to finish their 'iced cream'. Kagome did her best to soothe the hanyou, promising she'd buy him his very own ice cream. Even bigger than the one Sesshoumaru had had.

This pleased the hanyou, who went about smirking superiorly. Sesshoumaru was a bit too content after indulging in the foreign treat and having all sorts of other fascinating things to examine to be put out by it.

The evening passed peacefully enough. Kagome was sad to hear that the brothers would be leaving first thing in the morning. Rin was even sadder, having found out she was going to be left with Kagome. She enjoyed spending time with the girl, to be sure...but nowhere near as much as she wanted to spend time with Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru silenced her arguments quickly, however.

"This Sesshoumaru will not risk your safety. Until my enemy is dealt with, I will not chance you being used against me." Rin nodded and automatically accepted his reasoning.

The first problem of the night occurred at bedtime. Rin bid everyone a good night and made her way to Kagome's room, where she'd been staying. Kagome's apartment wasn't terribly large and she didn't have a guest room, after all.

This in itself wasn't really anything unusual - it was, in fact, entirely expected. The problem occurred a few minutes later when Sesshoumaru announce he was retiring for the evening as well...and followed Rin, shutting the door behind him. There was a distinct 'click' of a lock a moment later. Kagome stared at the door, jaw open and her eyes wide, stricken speechless for a long moment.

That passed quickly. "SESSHOUMARU! What in the HELL are you doing?!"

Sesshoumaru reappeared in the door a moment later, his eyes narrowing. "I am going to sleep."

"But...but that's my room! And Rin is in there!"

"Precisely. I will watch over my ward. Until I depart, she remains in my care."

"You can't sleep in the same room as her!"

Sesshoumaru stared hard at Kagome. He wasn't about to do as the human said, in any case, but he figured he might as well hear her reasoning if he was to get any peace. "Why?"

"It's indecent! She's...she's...and you're...she's not old enough yet, you pervert!"

Sesshoumaru hiked one elegant eyebrow, not following her reasoning even if he fully understood her accusation. He growled low in his throat. "I have not laid a finger on Rin in the matter you are suggesting, miko, nor do I intend to this night. However, if I so chose, I would be perfectly within my rights." So saying, the door clicked shut again.

Inuyasha headed Kagome off before the fuming woman could storm the room. "Easy, Kagome...heh. Seriously, you're waging a pointless battle."

"POINTLESS?! She's only thirteen!"

Inuyasha blinked a few times. "Er...yeah. Kagome, y'know...things are different where we come from. Lots of girls her age are already long-married with children."

Kagome blinked and stared at Inuyasha. "But...but thats wrong! And what the hell kind of bullshit is him saying he'd be within his rights?! AND ITS MY BEDROOM! WHERE THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO SLEEP!?!"

Inuyasha sighed - he hated when situations like this cropped up and the culture-gap was so glaringly obvious. "Look. This may be your time, but we're not part of it. You have a habit of forgetting that. Things are obviously done differently. What age do females get married here?"

"Eighteen, at the minimum!"

"Why? I thought you human females were more or less considered mature at twelve or thirteen...whenever you ...y'know."

"Just because we get the ability to have kids does NOT mean we're adult! Your brain keeps growing until eighteen or so. When you're younger than that, you aren't fully equipped to make decisions regarding your life!"

Inuyasha sighed heavily. "Yeah. Well. In our society...and youkai society...being able to have kids DOES make you an adult. Rin's pretty much prime marrying age. If her parents were alive they'd probably already be making arrangements. But it doesn't matter, anyway. Sessh claimed her."

"You can't just CLAIM someone! How does he even know she'd want that?"

Inuyasha gave Kagome an incredulous look. "Alright, seriously, Kagome...I can understand you having issues with our societies having different views, but you can't be that blind."

Kagome scowled but couldn't really argue with Inuyasha's logic on THAT count - a complete stranger could pick up on Rin's opinion of Sesshoumaru the briefest moment of observation. "Still, you can't just CLAIM someone."

"We're not human, Kagome."

"Rin is."

"She's been raised by a taiyoukai for the last several years and before that was too young for it to have mattered. She doesn't really think like humans. Besides, Sesshoumaru sure as hell isn't going to act like a human for anyone. He claimed her and will probably take her as his mate when she can give him pups."

Inuyasha thought this was a perfectly logical, rational, reasonable argument. Kagome let out a screech of horrified indignation, causing Inuyasha to scramble back a couple steps and flatten his ears. Kagome stormed past him and hammered on the door, yelling.

"Sesshoumaru, you bastard, get out of my bedroom and leave that poor girl alone! How dare you use her for some kind of..of...puppy factory?! You're despicable!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru eyed the door from his perch on the bed with an arched eyebrow, not missing a single word of Kagome's entire rant - indeed, he doubted anyone within half a league had missed it, the screeching miko was being anything but quiet. He wasn't doing anything at all to warrant her accusations - he was half sitting, half laying, propped against the headboard. Rin was curled up next to him in a gown of some sort of white, fluffy material that Kagome had bought her. His mokomoko was wrapped around her waist protectively, but otherwise he wasn't even touching the girl.

Rin propped herself up on her elbows to listen wide-eyed to Kagome yelling at Inuyasha. To be honest, she didn't understand Kagome's argument at all. Inuyasha's responses were too quiet for her human ears to pick up. The girl sat up sharply when Kagome started hammering on the door so forcefully that it shook on its hinges.

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows shot up when he heard Kagome's latest accusation. He didn't have a clear idea what a factory was, but he had enough context clues that Kagome's meaning was perfectly clear regardless. He growled softly, offended not only at being thus accused when he had JUST told the idiot human what his intentions were, but also angry that she should dare presume to tell him what he should or should not do. If he wanted to have a pup with Rin, that was ENTIRELY his business and NONE of Kagome's.

The thought set him back several steps mentally. He had thought briefly about the ramifications of claiming Rin as his mate, but he hadn't really THOUGHT about it. His mate would be expected, of course, to bear him an heir. But there was a whole big step in between a simple claim and then introducing one's heir to the world that he really hadn't taken into consideration...

He spared a glance at Rin and did a bit of a double take. The poor girl was redder than he'd ever seen a human, and he briefly wondered if she was in some sort of danger. He noticed the way her eyes were straying towards him despite how hard she was trying to NOT look at him. Kagome's screeching and pounding stopped and a moment later he heard a yelp from his brother. Good, Inuyasha was distracting her.

"Rin."

The girl jumped and then slowly turned to look at him. "Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama?..."

"Ignore the miko and sleep."

Rin paused before speaking. "She...doesn't think we're sleeping, does she...?"

"It does not seem that way."

Rin laughed nervously. "Wh...what else would we be doing?"

Sesshoumaru turned his full attention to her then, one eyebrow raised suspiciously. "You seem to have an inkling...how much do you know and where did you learn such things?" He knew he had SURELY never had any such talks with his ward - whomever had was going to feel his wrath.

"I...I found a book in one of the villages we passed a while back. And...um...I...I know it involves kissing. And...and it has to be dark. And...um...touching. I think. But maybe not. And sleeping."

Sesshoumaru blinked, then chuckled. Rin had no idea. "I have touched you and slept next to you, in the dark, for several years. If this is the case, why do you not already carry my pup?"

Rin blinked at him, wide-eyed, her hands clamping immediately to her stomach as she drew back from him as far as the confines of the bed would allow. Sesshoumaru couldn't help but laugh, and Rin squinted at him. "Sesshoumaru-sama is teasing Rin..." she accused, although she was more than a little surprised.

"Yes. I promise you, the process of mating and producing a pup is far more ... involved."

Rin scooted back in next to him, eyes bright and shining with curiosity. // Uh-oh. Oh, Rin, don't say it... Please... Please don't say it...//

"What does it involve?"

Sesshoumaru would have slapped his forehead if he were prone to such things. "It is not something I should discuss with you," he said abruptly.

"Oh." Rin nodded, accepting that. Sighing inwardly in relief, Sesshoumaru missed the contemplative look that drifted across her features. "Can you show me?"

Sesshoumaru choked and sat bolt upright, golden eyes widening in something akin to alarm as he stared at his ward. Oh, she could not know how...terribly...terribly tempting such an offer was...how wickedly delicious it would be to the demon lord to have such a virgin sacrifice. Sesshoumaru swallowed hard and beat back his inner demon. He had never given in to lust before, and he was not about to start now! He had gotten by JUST fine without it. His voice was a bit hoarse.

"Rin, you should not...tempt this Sesshoumaru. You have not had your first heat yet, you are incapable of conceiving a pup regardless. It is...not appropriate."

"Oh." Rin blinked, then flashed him a sunny smile. "Ok. Rin will go to sleep, then." She paused, considering. "Does it involve sleeping?"

"Rin. Go to sleep."

Rin smiled and snuggled up against his side. "Good night, Lord Sesshoumaru."

"Good night."

Sesshoumaru sighed inwardly - between the over-curious and unconsciously tempting girl that he wanted in ways he didn't even care to dwell on...and the miko and his brother in the other room...he was not going to get any sleep this night.


	20. Chapter 19

Pride (In the Name of Love) 19 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Thanks as always for your reviews - they make this worthwhile. I had questions this time. To clarify...

This is NOT (yet?) a Sesshy / Rin fic. Could it end up that way? I suppose it's always a possibility. A few things will be clarified in the coming chapters, ESPECIALLY in the regards to them.

The fact of the matter is, I don't KNOW what sort of fic it is. I don't plan things...I just sit down, the words come out, and then I get to read as eagerly as anyone else to figure out what I just typed. I don't have an outline...I start out with a basic idea and then just go with it. As my characters evolve, and as the plot evolves, so too does my story.

This one I started under the following premise. "I have not yet written an IY fic. I love Sesshoumaru. I love all the things that make him Sesshoumaru...his intelligence and icy pride, the way his self control and his dominance are so important - so lets take this proud, powerful beast and let the entire world he's surrounded himself with shatter...break him and see how he develops, how he recovers, when he has been stripped of that pride." Basically, I wanted to get into Sesshoumaru's head and really crawl around, find all that made him tick...and twist it to see where he'd end up.

Everything that's happened since then has just been whatever my latest idea was. When I would wake up in the morning on my days off or when I get home from work (I work the graveyard shift) I'd settle in and belt out the latest chapter.

So, back to my original point - this is not a Sesshy / Rin fic now, nor will it be soon. In fact, if it ultimately ends up there, I may be surprised. I've never actually written a fic that's featured a main pairing that WASNT yaoi in nature. That may be in part due to the fact that I despise 99.9% of the females in animes I've seen or manga I've read...I like Rin, she's an exception. Kagome, at least, isn't ENTIRELY useless...but I digress.

For any that are wondering, there WILL be some yaoi romance going on at some points. I know of one relationship that will turn up for SURE...eventually. As for Sesshoumaru... the chance of him being involved with someone OTHER than Rin (in a positive fashion) is high. Will that someone be Inuyasha? I do not know. Will it last? Dunno. Only time will tell.

But bear with me, y'all. There will likely eventually be romance of all flavors (this fic is going to go on forever it seems...) and hopefully everyone ends up happy at some point or another. ^^ I'm as eager to find out as you all are.

So without further ado, I shall start my three-day vacation! On to C.19!

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Rin's eyes snapped open in the middle of the night, her blood running cold and fear freezing her heart in her chest as she heard the most terrible, gut-wrenching sound she'd ever heard in all her days. She would remember it for the rest of her life. It was a twisted, wretched, tormented animal howl of unspeakable pain.

And it had come from Sesshoumaru.

Rin let out a startled shriek of horror when she caught sight of him in the moonlight filtering into the room. His back was arched and every muscle in his body strained to its limit. His hair and skin was damp with sweat. He clawed ineffectually at his stomach - if he had still had his claws there was a fair chance he would be ripping himself to bloody ribbons right now. His teeth were clenched and his eyes squeezed shut. His mokomoko writhed around him, seemingly in distress.

Rin never made it to the door. She scrambled to her feet, tears of horror and grief already flowing freely, and had been hurrying to get Inuyasha. The door smashed inward as the hanyou in question kicked it in, splintering the wood around the lock. He snapped on the light and gasped as Sesshoumaru let out another howl, this one more desperate than the last.

"Sesshoumaru! Rin, what happened to him?!" Inuyasha asked in a panic, eyes rapidly scanning his brother and trying to discern the cause of his agony.

"I..I don't know...I was sleeping and then...then I...I heard him...oh, Lord Sesshoumaru...!" Rin collapsed at the side of the bed, sobbing uncontrollably. Kagome had finally made the scene, and she pulled Rin into her arms, not knowing what to do about Sesshoumaru.

Inuyasha frowned and tugged Sesshoumaru's shirt out of the way, struggling to keep the taiyoukai's rigid limbs out of his way. Something bulged under the skin of his stomach, near his ribcage...and then it MOVED. Inuyasha let out a horrified yelp. "Sorry about this, Sessh..." The hanyou darted his hands forward, claws digging into Sesshoumaru's flesh around the bulge. He hit something hard before his claws punctured. Something small writhed in his grasp as he withdrew his bloody hand.

It was some sort of ugly, round black bug. It looked vaguely like a scarab beetle, but with several sets of sharp mandibles. Claw-tipped legs scrabbled madly in the air and it oozed a thick purple ichor from its injuries over Inuyasha's claws as it stilled. "Wh...what the fuck..." he finally managed, looking at it in sick dread. He slowly lifted his eyes back to Sesshoumaru - the taiyoukai's pain was still clearly evident and did not appear to have diminished at all - this bug was probably not alone.

"I...what do I do?!" Inuyasha blurted in panic. He did the only thing he could think of at the moment - he knocked Sesshoumaru hard over the head and rendered his brother unconscious. The taiyoukai slumped into a heap. Kagome shook her head, looking decidedly ill at the mere thought of the insects. Rin quivered in her arms. She had never seen Sesshoumaru in agony like this - never in her recollection had the taiyoukai shown more than the smallest grimace of pain at the gravest of his infrequent injuries.

Inuyasha managed to dig another squirming bug out of his brother's side. "I...I need to take him home, see if...if the healers can do anything...or if that raven knows something. Thanks for your help, Kagome. I'll come back when I can." The hanyou didn't wait for a response, snatching Sesshoumaru up and leaping out the window, making for the well at top speed.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The journey was a stressful one for Inuyasha. He didn't pause to rest, merely kept going. A couple of times, Sesshoumaru started to claw his way back into consciousness - Inuyasha made sure he didn't succeed. He knew Sesshoumaru would have a whopping headache later - but he couldn't bear the sight of his brother in so much anguish.

Inuyasha was about ready to drop from exhaustion by the time he reached the castle. True, he had far more endurance than any human, but hauling his brother and traveling so far, so fast had taken its toll on him. He grit his teeth together as he plunked his brother down in his bed, fumbling in his haori for Sairex's feather.

"How do you use this damn thing..." With a frustrated growl, he shook the feather. "Hey, bird!"

Nothing happened.

Inuyasha had neither the time nor the patience to figure it out and stalked out to find Miroku.

Miroku noticed his friend's agitation and bone-deep weariness almost immediately, and hurried over, concerned. "Inuyasha, you're exhausted! Whats wrong? Sit down..."

"Don't have time, monk." He attempted to throw the feather at Miroku, but the wind resistance caused it to fall pathetically short and flutter its way to the ground. "Hn...use your damn feather and get that bird's attention. Somethin's wrong with Sesshoumaru."

"What?"

"Dunno, he's full of bugs. I'm going to go get the healer."

Before Miroku could question Inuyasha any further, the hanyou had staggered his way out of the room and down the hall.

Miroku sighed and picked up his own feather, idly trailing a finger along its delicate spine. He closed his eyes and concentrated on it, attempting to contact Sairex while a tiny part of him wondered if it would actually work.

Miroku was rather surprised when he heard the raven youkai's oddly lilting voice in his mind. // Miroku? Vhy are you calling me? Is everyting alright?...//

"Er..." Miroku coughed, then attempted to project his response through the feather. // No...something's wrong with Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha said to contact you. //

// Did he say vhat it vas? //

// Something about bugs. //

// Vell...may I zhare your body den? I can't very vell examine anyone from here...though I dunno vhy a bug problem vould merit calling me. //

// Er...yes, I suppose. // Miroku concentrated on relaxing and opening himself, taking down his natural defenses to let the raven youkai in. The possession was much easier and less stressful this time. Miroku felt none of what he had felt previously, none of the sensation of being shoved to the side and trapped in his own mind. The thought occurred to him briefly that he was probably the first monk to willingly allow himself to be possessed by a demon. Sairex chuckled, having assumed control of Miroku's mouth and movements.

"Someting like dat, yes...if Lord Zezzhoumaru is villing, vhen all dis is over I may ztay on as his advisor. I vould enjoy putting my talents to good use. In da meanwhile, I vould train you. You have much potential, but you are unzkilled."

// Well, I left the monastery to roam and help others. //

"Zo you zay. And I'm zure you have. However...dere are many, many tings dis bird can teach you, if you are villing. Not all of dem are typical monkly knowledge, true...but it is all zpiritual power all da zame. Not dark tings, not demon tings...s'like any other knowledge. It can be used for good or evil. Now...help me find Zezzhoumaru."

Miroku still thought it was horribly weird to hear himself talking in his voice, but with such a strange accent - where the hells did an accent like that even COME from? - and further, carrying on a two-sided conversation with himself. People would think he was crazy if they overheard him.

Sairex smirked. "Dey already tink you crazy, monk. You're human. A human holy man, living and vorking in da castle of a notorious demon lord." As he spoke, he moved down the halls at Miroku's guidance until he stood in Sesshoumaru's chambers. "Ah, very good."

Inuyasha squinted at him. "What's up, monk? You reach the bird?"

"You could say dat, yes...now tell 'da bird', vhat is vrong vith your brother."

Inuyasha scratched his ear - it was difficult listening to the monk's familiar voice coming out with such a twist on his words. "Guess so. I don't know. He's full of bugs."

"Bugs?"

Inuyasha held up one of the squirming insects that he had not skewered. Sairex groaned deeply. Before he could speak, however, the healer spoke up.

"I do not know what to do with Lord Sesshoumaru..."

"Get out of my vay!" Sairex grumbled, making his way over next to the taiyoukai. He ignored the youkai healer's offended look. He pushed down on Sesshoumaru's stomach, hard. Immediately, he felt something slither away beneath his hand.

"Do you know how to fix him?" Inuyasha demanded.

"Mrr. Yes."

"What the hell happened to him?"

Sairex sighed. "Vell...Zetsukosei...vhen he vas...er..." Sairex paused, trying to find a delicate way to phrase it. "Vhen he violated your brother, he released zpores. Nasty little parasites. Proximity to his unique energy keeps da eggs dormant. But vhen you left...da zeal zlowly began to break down. Da eggs matured and hatched. Now dey are big enough to move around and...eat. But your brother is ztrong...Zetsukosei knew dis. Da bugs von't kill him, he'll heal too fast...but they'll continue eating him alive. Zetsukosei vanted to make sure dat if he escaped, Zezzhoumaru vould have to come back to him."

Inuyasha stared in horror. "Wh...what the fuck do we do then? I won't give him back to that bastard!"

"Vell...dere are only two options. Da first, you bring him back to Zetsukosei. Obviously not much of an option. Da other...vell, ve cut him open and try and take all da bugs out ourselves. Ve will likely be able to get all da mature ones."

Inuyasha frowned. "I don't like the way you said that..."

Sairex sighed. "Vell, ve probably couldn't get all da eggs. Zo he'd be fine until da next round hatches...and den ve have to do it all over again."

Inuyasha growled angrily. "That fucking bastard...well, we don't have much choice. Lets start bug hunting."

Sairex nodded quietly. "I vill...vhen I get back, I'll get you zometing to kill dem. I have...lots of tings Zetsukosei vill trade heavily for."

Inuyasha paused, squinting at him, although it was very hard to read him since he wore Miroku's expressions. "You aren't going to do anything stupid, are you?"

Sairex shook his head and gave Inuyasha a lopsided grin. "Kaaa, no. Don't vorry."

"Why are you helping us? I ran into you pretty much at random and you've been around saving our asses ever since."

Sairex was quiet for a long moment. "Da rules of my bondage make it zo I cannot harm Zetsukosei on my own. If I try to hurt him, I hurt myzelf vorse. I learned dat da hard vay. As long as he lives in any vay, I am bound to him. I have to ztay in the zame vorld as him...I can't even ztray dat far avay on my own, to be honest. Dere's a limit. And all he does, I...feel, in zome vays. Zo it vasn't...all by chance dat I found you. I...vas dere in some vays for all he did to your brother." Sairex closed his eyes, obviously pained. "I am not a bad person, Inuyazha. I don't claim to be good, but I'm not evil. I do not delight in cruelty and torture and misery, it zickens me. Zo I vas looking for you."

Inuyasha frowned. "I'm sorry..."

"You're da first one to ever rescue zomeone from him. And dere have been many, many... zo I took da chance of contacting you, hoping you'll be da one to defeat him. If I can help in any vay, it benefits me too."

"Got it. Alright, how are we...um...going to do this?"

"I vill try to force dem all to one place vith zome zpiritual magic...it might hurt your brother zome, but less dan da bugs are."

Inuyasha nodded. "Ok, do it."

After making sure the room was sealed, Sairex laid his hands on Sesshoumaru's chest and concentrated. There was a bright, sizzling spark a moment later and he winced but didn't pull back. Nothing appeared to happen for a long moment. Then several ripples began wiggling under Sesshoumaru's skin and Inuyasha had to look away or be sick, knowing that every one of them was a flesh-eating bug inside his brother.

"Alright...quickly, quickly. Cut here and get da damn tings out." Inuyasha saw a definite lump and quickly sliced it open with his claw. He did retch then as a swarm of the small pseudo-scarabs scrambled to get away from the searing energy flooding their previous host.

Once they were sure Sesshoumaru was bug-free - or at least as much as they could make him - Sairex slapped a bandage over the wound and sighed, heading around the room and crushing bugs. "Vell, he zhould be fine until da next group hatch. I'll..give your monk back his body and zee about dealing vith Zetsukosei about dis."

"Thanks, Sairex. You're a good friend, y'know that?"

The raven flashed him his lopsided grin again. "Kaa, I just be a zelfish old bird. Entirely in dis for me."

"Suuure. Don't...do anything stupid, alright? Don't give that bastard anything important."

Sairex nodded. "You vorry too much. I know vhat Zetsukosei vants and vhat I'll need to give him. Relax."

"Promise me you don't do something stupid."

"I'd say I vasn't prone to doing ztupid tings, but I landed myself in dis situation in da first place." Sairex winked, and Inuyasha knew the bird was gone by the way Miroku's expression shifted and he rubbed his eyes. He immediately looked green.

"Bugs...ugh..."

"Mrr...tricky bird never promised me. "

"He's survived this long, I'm sure he'll be fine, Inuyasha."

"Yeah...now we just have to wait for Sesshoumaru to wake up...and I have to explain why he's full of holes and has a headache."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex sighed softly as he strode into the front gate of Tsetsukosei's castle. // Don't do something stupid, indeed. Ah, you old fool, you're getting soft. The poor inu, though... his only crime was being born the son of his father and too beautiful for his own good. The fact that he was so strong and powerful was just icing on the cake. I simply hope I'm not gambling for nothing. //

He made his way to the throne room, ignoring the hisses and growls of dark things in darker corners. His tattered black clothes fluttered around him and the worn soles of his boots made soft noises on the floor. He tossed back some of his numerous braids and braced himself before striding into the throne room.

Tsetsukosei was in his throne and fuming. He didn't look at all pleased, and his growl was low and dangerous when he took note of his former advisor. "Sairex...you DARE come here after all the trouble you've caused me?"

"Hn..." the raven responded, shutting the doors behind him and sighing. "You know as vell as I do dat I'm stuck by you."

"You've been helping the inu...in fact, I'm sure that you helped them escape!"

"Yes."

Tsetsukosei growled. "And you so boldly admit it?"

"Vhy bother to lie? You know better anyvays. I told you I vould do all I could to thwart you, and zo I am."

"So what brings you here now then?"

"Your zpores hatched."

Tsetsukosei smirked darkly. "Ah. I take it you told them their options."

Sairex shrugged. "Dey vould rather cut him open every few days to remove dem dan ever give him back to you, Zetsukosei. I'm glad."

Tsetsukosei growled. "Hn. The inu will be in near constant anguish, then."

Sairex turned his back to the draconic beast. He couldn't look at him. "Give me da cure, Zetsukosei."

"And what, pray, do you have to offer me that might POSSIBLY persuade me to do such a thing? There is still the chance that this may force them to return."

Sairex closed his eyes and slowly began disrobing. Tsetsukosei watched as the raven dropped his shirt to the floor, his eyes feasting on the slender form. Several dark, swirling tattoos covered his pale skin - most of them mystical or tribal in nature. The raven's voice was quiet when he finally made his offer.

"I vill take Zezzhoumaru's place."

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A/N - Does that count as something stupid? LOL.... And just to clarify, because someone asked me on one of my lists... Sairex's accent is not like anything on earth, but if you had to piece it together....think the bastard child of a Jamaican and Transylvanian accent. Like....Bella Lugosi vampire. I vant to zuck your blood, ya mon!" XD


	21. Chapter 20

Pride (In the Name of Love) 20 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wow. I take it as a great personal credit that people like my little original character so much that they bemoan his fate. ^^ To be entirely honest, I didn't expect to even bring Sairex back into the story at all after his first disappearance...but I figured some things needed to be clarified. And I also didn't want to spend fifty chapters waiting for Inuyasha to piece together clues, somehow figure a way for him to even find said clues, and then have a logical and in character reason for him to draw the correct conclusions. Having the birdy explain it was SO much simpler.

Then he kinda grew on me...so I figured I'd keep him around for the story. Now he might be around for the whole arc. XD Can't help it. I like him. However, I created him so of COURSE *I* like him. What surprised me was that others like him enough to be sad for his fate and are cheering on his rescue...that's a huge credit to me. Thank y'all for stroking my ego. XD

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Sairex returned to Miroku's body a couple hours later - after asking permission, of course. Miroku frowned internally - the raven seemed exceptionally grave and subdued. // Are you alright, Sairex...? //

"Kaa...Dis bird is fine...no need to vorry." As he spoke, he moved to the kitchen and began plucking out various herbs and spices - Sesshoumaru had an exceptional supply of exotic things, and for this Sairex was glad. He set about mixing things very specifically, chanting softly on occasion and infusing the concoction with snippets of his magic. When he was finished, he had a faintly glowing, oily purple liquid in a small flask.

// You don't sound fine. Or do you forget, I can feel you to a point since you're sharing my body? //

"Den you'll keep your mouth zhut about it. Miroku...I've done zometing drastic, and Inuyazha vill definitely not approve. Zo I do not intend to tell him. But you must do me a favor."

// Sure...you've helped us enough. Anything I can do, name it. //

"Do not let dem ignore Zetsukosei after I zpeak to dem in a moment. He must be killed."

// I don't think they'd let him slide regardless. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru are both the vengeance-seeking types over something like this. //

"Promise me."

// ... What did you DO, Sairex?... //

"Noting." Sairex's answer was abrupt and he didn't elucidate further when they reached Sesshoumaru's room. Inuyasha still sat by his brother's bed, watching his sleeping form intently. "Inuyazha, ve need to talk."

"Sairex?"

Sairex nodded. "I vill be brief, my time is...zhort. " He held out the flask. "Vhen Zezzhoumaru vakes up, have him drink dis. It's not likely to taste good, and it might make him a bit...ill. But it vill kill da bugs an' da eggs."

"Really? That's awesome! How the hell did you get this?"

Sairex continued blankly, as if he hadn't heard the question. "Also, and dis is very important...tell Zezzhoumaru dat he is released from his contract."

Inuyasha blinked slowly. "What?..."

"Zetsukosei has released him. He vill no longer come after him, attempt to hurt him, or attempt to hurt da ones he cares about. Zezzhoumaru no longer has to vorry about it."

Inuyasha stared at him. "How...what in the FUCK did you give him? How important was it?"

Sairex paused for a minute before chuckling. "Vell...I really zuppose dat depends on your point of view. Zome vould zay...not zo important."

Inuyasha squinted. "And what would you say?"

Sairex considered it. "Kaa, noting dat can't be retaken."

Inuyasha paused, contemplating the bird and his tricky wording. "And ... what would I have said?"

Sairex was silent for a long time. "Mrr. Dere is da chance you vould have been against it."

"Great. You did something fucking stupid. I knew you were going to when you didn't promise me."

"Ztupid? No. Vhat I did vas to zave your brother and keep Zetsukosei contained and not running amok zeeking vays to hurt him or dose dat he cares about. Vhat I did vas get da recipe to kill dose damn bugs. All I gave Zetsukosei in return vas zomething to keep him distracted until you kill him. Den it doesn't matter anymore. I have faith in you and your brother, dat you vill be da ones dat destroy him. Zo I took a couple of...calculated risks. I'm zorry, but I have to go. I vill zee you vhen you come to kill 'im."

"Wait!"

"Too late, he's gone..." Miroku mumbled, rubbing his head. Sairex may have been able to hide the core of the truth from Inuyasha, but Miroku had more or less figured it out. It made him feel sick.

Before either of them could dwell on it much further, Sesshoumaru's eyes flickered open. He let out a low growl, closing his eyes again against the throbbing in his skull. Miroku blinked, then handed the flask Sairex had made to Inuyasha. "I'll...er...leave you two alone." Miroku scurried out of the room before Inuyasha could protest.

Inuyasha scooted closer to his brother. "Sessh?...Are you alright? How are you? How do you feel?"

"You cannot POSSIBLY be serious."

Inuyasha grinned slightly. "That bad, huh? Here...I don't know what the hell this purple shit is, but that raven Sairex said it'll kill all the bugs."

"Bugs?..."

"Er...yeah...that's why you feel so shitty. You had bugs eating you alive...heh."

Sesshoumaru slowly opened his eyes to narrow golden slits. "That does not explain my pounding headache."

"Oh. Er. That was my fault. I did it for your own good. I couldn't stand seeing you conscious in that much pain." Inuyasha frowned.

Sesshoumaru sighed, then sat up. He snatched the vial and swallowed it in one swift pull, though he turned an odd color and very nearly spluttered it back out. It tasted AWFUL.

It occurred to the taiyoukai then that he was not still in Kagome's apartment, as he had been when last he was lucid and coherent.. He glanced at his brother. "How is Rin?"

Inuyasha swallowed and looked down. "She was scared shitless for you, Sessh...so was I. Did you want to go back? We should probably let them know you're going to be alright. Actually, you can bring Rin home now. Sairex said to tell you he cut some sort of deal with that bastard and you're free of him now. He's not going to come after you or yours ever again."

Sesshoumaru nodded slowly. "That is good. However, I will not be going back to the well."

"Alright. I have to go soon anyways, I'll bring Rin back then."

"No."

Inuyasha blinked slowly. "Eh? What?"

"Leave her there."

"Are you fucking crazy? What are you talking about? I thought you loved her. Gonna make it a BIT hard to have a mate you'll never fucking see again, Sessh."

Sesshoumaru glared at his brother, but there was no real heat behind it. "It is because I care for her that I cannot see her again."

"You aren't making any sense."

Sesshoumaru sighed - he HATED explaining himself. That was one thing he DID like about Rin...she may question him, but when he answered, it was extremely rare she'd question him further. She would accept what he told her and seemed to intuitively know the things he didn't say that went along with various commands or statements. His brother, however, didn't possess that same sense.

"I do...care for Rin. That is why she must stay. Too many humans here know of her affiliation with me, and she would never be trusted. She is not a demon. Especially coming into her maturity, she should be with her own kind. She needs things I cannot provide her. Female companionship. Other humans. Wandering the countryside on patrols and being the ward of a demon-lord, removed from her society entirely...it is not right."

"Did you ask her what she wants?"

Sesshoumaru glared at his brother. "No. I never have. In truth, I've never had to. Rin is a beautifully simple, open creature. Her needs and her wants are very obvious at any given time. She makes no effort to hide them. And I know very well what she THINKS she wants right now."

"You. Thats all she's ever wanted, as far as I know, in one way or another."

"I will not ruin her innocence."

Inuyasha snorted. "Someone has to, why not have it be the one she loves?"

The strained thread of Sesshoumaru's patience and emotional masking snapped. "I AM NOT WORTHY OF HER LOVE!" The taiyoukai looked as shocked as Inuyasha was at his outburst before he continued. "This Sesshoumaru does not merit such pure devotion. I am not worthy of such love, from her or any other. I would only taint her. I am ruined. This Sesshoumaru does not intend to ever take a mate."

"That's fucking bullshit, Sessh. Just because you were attacked doesn't mean--"

Sesshoumaru growled and lunged forward, grabbing Inuyasha by the front of his haori. He bared his fangs. "I was not strong enough to protect her, or myself. Do you see this mark on my neck, Inuyasha? DO YOU SEE IT? I am CLAIMED. I am blatantly marked as the whore of another. The youkai of these lands and elsewhere...ESPECIALLY elsewhere...will see it as a sign of my weakness. And they will come. Even if my own darkness does not crush her light, eventually an attack to hurt me will get through to her. I will not be responsible for Rin's death again. I will not be forced into such a situation because of my emotional attachment to another again."

Inuyasha stared at his brother in open shock. The angry, bitter self-loathing in his voice made the hanyou want to flinch. "You aren't a whore. You were attacked."

Sesshoumaru released Inuyasha abruptly, laying back down and turning his back to the hanyou. His voice was harsh. "Leave me. I do not wish to continue this conversation."

"Yeah, well, you're damn well going to. I'm not going to sit here and let you hate yourself and blame yourself for everything. You aren't tainted or ruined because of all this. So you got a scar, big fucking deal. You're still Sesshoumaru. And we both know you aren't weak. You're one of the strongest youkai alive."

"I am nothing but a lie."

"Fuck that. If nothing else, you're my brother and that damn well better mean something. I don't give a shit if Myouga can beat you up. You're my only real family and that alone is reason enough for me to care about you."

Sesshoumaru slowly turned to stare at his brother. Inuyasha flushed, unused to making such emotional outbursts. Now that he really thought about it, he was kind of embarrassed. Sure, he'd meant every word, but...

"Keh. I guess I'll...let you rest or whatever. But don't deny yourself good things just because you have this fucking stupid, misguided sense that you're no good because someone bested you and hurt you. I thought you prided yourself on your logic."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. "...You have my apologies."

"I do?"

"Yes. However...I still will not take a mate, and I still will not retrieve Rin. It is because I care for the girl that I wish to see her have a life among her own kind, and not the half-life she would have in the demon world. It would do her good to have the caring and advice of an elder human female, especially now. And in that world, she does not have the same reputation as she does here. She would simply be another young woman."

Inuyasha frowned and Sesshoumaru looked away, not wanting to continue. Oh, it hurt to contemplate leaving his little human behind! And he truly had been intending to take her as a mate before he thought about all the ramifications. // All I have just told Inuyasha is true. And...I will have to part with her one day, far too soon, regardless. She is only human. She will live, age, and die in the blink of an eye. Time is cruel.... //

"Inuyasha...I wish to rest. I am exhausted. Please, leave me."

"Do you promise to stop being so fucking hard on yourself? You're...there's nothing wrong with you, Sessh."

"There are many things wrong with me, Inuyasha. Far too many to enumerate."

"I still care about you."

// And I can't understand why. // "If that's the case, you'll let me sleep."

"Fine, fine... you know where to find me if you need me. Tomorrow I'm going to start making plans to kill that bastard. Want to help? I bet it'd make you feel better.

"His death is mine...but you may assist me."

Inuyasha grinned widely and headed for the door. "Fair enough. Sleep well, Sessh."


	22. Chapter 21

Pride (In the Name of Love) 21 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mm...This one probably could have been a little longer but....I figured the...'added bonus' that's buried in here would make up for it.

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Miroku couldn't sleep. It was the middle of the night, but he was too worried. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru may have considered the quirky raven demon as a friend, but they hadn't walked around in the same skin as him. After tossing and turning for a long while, he finally dug out the feather Sairex had left with him and concentrated on the bird.

The response was a long time in coming, and when it finally did, it was bone-deep weary. // Vhat can you possibly need me for at dis hour...? // There was no anger or ire in the raven's tone, simply exhaustion.

// Nothing...// Miroku thought back with a slight frown. // I was just...concerned for you. //

The raven's mental voice softened. // Kaa... you humans and your zentimental natures... I cannot zay I am fine and unharmed, but I can zay it's noting zerious. Noting dat von't heal. Just flesh vounds. In all honesty, Zetsukosei...for all his rage at me...is too afraid of hurting me, damaging me beyond repair. If he breaks me, he loses my power. At least, dat's my theory. Does Inuyazha or Zezzhoumaru know da truth of it yet? //

// No. I haven't told them. //

// Good. Please do not. //

// Inuyasha will be PISSED when he finds out, and I don't say that lightly. I can't imagine Sesshoumaru will be too thrilled either. If they knew, they'd be beating down this demon beast's door trying to get you out. //

// And all dat haste and lack of planning vould quite possibly be deir undoing. I'd rather dey plan dis out right and vin den have dem rush in blindly. From vat I have zeen, Inuyazha is not much given to lengthy plans and rather does tings...on da zpur of da moment. //

// Oh, you've got him pegged pretty good. Sesshoumaru's pretty well the opposite though, from what I've learned. He plans things out with meticulous detail. You should see his paperwork...I thought I was well organized... //

// Vell, hopefully da two of dem vork together on dis instead of fighting over vhich vay is right... //

// Mrr... yeah. I suppose I'll intercede and try and mediate that as best as I can. The chances of them bringing me are slim...Inuyasha is still convinced that, for all my training and years of practicing, I'm still in dire need of protection and cannot take care of myself. It's cute, his concern, but it does get oppressive at times. //

// Vell, I'll have to agree vith him on dis one. Not in general, but...you have noting to fight zomething like Zetsukosei vith. Maybe vhen I am done training you. //

Miroku couldn't help but grin. // Eh, what makes you think I need so much training?...I'm not too bad. I almost fought you off the first time you tried to take possession of me. //

// Kaaa, dat one hurt me. But I vas trying not to hurt YOU, or it vould have been easy. You have lots of potential, Miroku. You are good, zurprisingly zo, but I can make you great. I can teach you tings lost...long ago. //

// How long ago? You must be a pretty old bird, if you claim to have known the Inu no Taisho and such... //

// Yes...I am. Plenty of time to learn a trick or two. But I vill have to talk to you another time...Zetsukosei is coming back for another round... // Miroku could almost hear the raven rolling his eyes, more annoyed than worried at the prospect of being tortured. // I do hope to zee you zoon, Miroku. It vill be nice to meet you in person. //

// Same to you. Take care, and I'll make sure those two come for you soon. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha had a brief moment of panic when he woke up. Sesshoumaru was not in his room - indeed, it looked as if he had not been there for a while and his scent was a few hours old. The hanyou heaved a tremendous sigh of relief when he found Sesshoumaru in his study scowling darkly at a stack of scrolls.

"Jeez, Sessh, you should warn a guy before you just up and vanish."

"Hn. You claim to be running this place and yet you are this far behind in dealing with important documents? And what sort of filing system is this?"

"I haven't touched the paperwork, how the hell should I know?"

Sesshoumaru stared at his brother in something approaching horror. "Then...you can't tell me you've done NONE of it...?"

"Meh... I can't read all that well, let alone write. Miroku's been taking care of things."

Sesshoumaru looked more than a little disconcerted. "You've let...a human...deal with the politics of a demon kingdom...."

Inuyasha thought about it and then grinned sheepishly. "Erm...yes?"

"...Our Lord Father must be rolling over in his grave at this atrocity..." Sesshoumaru slowly massaged his temples with his fingers, sitting at the desk.

"To be honest, I don't know how the hell you did all this on your own, Sesshoumaru. Patrols, meetings, paperwork, court functions...and you still had time to drop in to spy on me or cause trouble or whatever the fuck it is you do..."

Sesshoumaru lifted his head to gaze flatly at his brother. "Inuyasha. I was born here and raised practically from birth to assume this position."

"Yeah? Well...I wasn't. So you should take your damn job back. No one can do it better than you. Or near as good as you."

Sesshoumaru flinched. "I cannot."

"Sessh..."

The taiyoukai growled. "Inuyasha, my own feelings on the matter aside...only an alpha demon is fit to run these lands and I have been VERY clearly branded as a beta. Even if it is not true...perception is something that matters a great deal in the political game. If a leader is PERCEIVED as weak in any fashion, then they are tried, and they are tested, and sometimes simply being thus perceived leads to actual weakness, or the discovery of one."

Inuyasha frowned. "So hide the scar and do what you were born to do. Shit, the old man didn't want ME running this joint with a human as my secretary."

Sesshoumaru scowled darkly. "Have some respect for your sire in these walls, Inuyasha. I will not brook any insults against him."

"Keh. I wasn't being disrespectful, just...sayin'. And anyways, I thought you got over your whole anti-human thing. What's it matter if Miroku helps me with the paperwork if you aren't gonna do it? You don't have a whole lot of room to talk when you're sweet on a human yourself. Everything you blamed our father for in regards to humans you're a hair from repeating!"

Sesshoumaru growled dangerously, and Inuyasha sensed he had just stepped over a line. Well, perhaps it was more of a giant diving leap over said line, judging from his brother's reaction. // Yep... // he thought as he attempted to scramble backwards as Sesshoumaru flew over the desk at him. // Definitely went too far there. //

Inuyasha hit the ground hard, landing flat on his back as he was tackled. The breath left him in a whoosh, and he was rather alarmed at the pained but enraged look on his brother's face. // How the fuck was I supposed to know it was such a sensitive issue?! // "Dammit, Sessh! Get off of me!"

Sesshoumaru wished fervently he had his claws - gouging Inuyasha in his rage would have been SO much more satisfying! How DARE he bring up THAT, of all things...it was so hard for the taiyoukai to attempt to accept himself. He had tried to put the issue down, hide it under the rug, and forget about it so he wouldn't have to think about it...only to have his brother dig it up and throw it in his damn face!

// Bastard might not have claws, but I'm going to fucking bruise! // "Let me go, you ass!" Inuyasha attempted to rake Sesshoumaru with his own claws, but his wrists were caught. The hanyou thrashed madly and managed to get his leg braced on the floor enough to flip Sesshoumaru to his back. Then it was his turn to hang on.

Inuyasha's anger dissipated when he got enough of a chance to take a good look at his brother's face. Tears gleamed in anguished golden eyes and his snarl had a broken edge to it. "Sessh...?"

Sesshoumaru allowed the fight to drift out of him and instead concentrated to try and pull his emotionless mask back on but it was too late and he knew it. His snarl turned into a low whine. "I...l-let me go."

"Sessh, I'm sorry...I didn't...."

"You wouldn't. The last thing I ever said to my Lord Father before he died was to scathingly insult him for his human lover and worse, his hanyou pup... I didn't...I didn't understand... He died thinking I despised him!"

Inuyasha was silent for a time before he finally started speaking slowly. "Everyone keeps telling me how wise and great our father was."

"He was," Sesshoumaru hissed, misinterpreting Inuyasha's words for another insult.

"Sessh, if he was as smart as everyone says he was...then I know he must have known you pretty good and would understand that you were just mad. And that you didn't agree with him. I'm sure he was wise enough to understand that what you said in a fit of anger...you didn't mean. I'm sure he knew how much you loved him. He knew you didn't hate him."

Sesshoumaru went very still and very quiet, his eyes widening slightly as he looked at Inuyasha. He quietly digested what his brother had said, and it was a long time before he spoke. His voice was soft, in a way Inuyasha had never heard before - soft and painfully vulnerable. "Do you...really think that?...

"Course. People get pissed and say things they don't mean all the time. Hell, I've said all sorts of things I didn't mean to you."

The taiyoukai was quiet for a long moment. Inuyasha released his wrists, deciding that their little fight was over. So it was with a good deal of surprise and a yelp that he found himself flipped abruptly back over and pinned down. Sesshoumaru was giving him a very intent look. "You didn't mean the things you have said to me...so how is it you DO feel for me?"

Inuyasha swallowed, suddenly feeling a lot more tense under his brother's guarded scrutiny. "Well...we haven't had a long time to have a relationship develop yet...but I'm learning to know you well enough that I could like you. You aren't...like you always pretend to be. I..." Inuyasha trailed off. Sesshoumaru leaned in slightly, his words almost inaudible, his voice carrying a slight hint of a tremor as his haunted gold eyes slid shut.

"And...you can care for me..despite what I have become? Despite the fact that this Sesshoumaru is...broken and used?"

Inuyasha frowned and reached up hesitantly to brush his fingers over Sesshoumaru's cheek, startling the taiyoukai into opening his eyes. "You aren't broken...and if you are, I'll do whatever it takes to fix you. I'm not going to leave you here like this and I won't let you drive me away. No one deserves to be alone...and you have been as much as I have most of my life."

Inuyasha wasn't sure what sort of reaction he actually expected. But whatever his expectations were, he wasn't prepared for the reality of what DID occur. Sesshoumaru leaned forward, capturing Inuyasha's gaze with his own, hesitating only when he was a hairsbreadth away, close enough to draw a shiver from the hanyou. His voice was a throaty whisper. "Thank you..."

Inuyasha gasped when Sesshoumaru actually made contact, unconsciously stealing the breath from his brother's lungs. His eyes were wide as his mind tried to process that he was being kissed. By his brother. By SESSHOUMARU.

His initial reaction was to jerk away out of panic, but he was able to restrain that. He was shocked to instead find himself hesitantly responding to the gentle pressure. Something in the back of his mind whispered to him that if he HAD pulled away, irrevocable damage would have been done to his brother's already fragile psyche. He could feel the nervous uncertainty and hesitation - Sesshoumaru was EXPECTING to be pushed away.

Inuyasha's body seemed to be moving of its own accord, contrary to the whirling thoughts of his mind. His arms slowly curled around the taiyoukai and he leaned up to increase the pressure of this slow, sweet, and strangely gentle kiss. All the while, his brain was running in crazed, rabid circles.

The thought of his brother having anything to do with another male - especially HIM - was surprising. He had assumed Sesshoumaru was in love with Rin. Further, he knew how his brother had always talked of having an heir - and it wasn't like he didn't have his choice of any demoness in all the lands...

Inuyasha's thoughts were stolen as Sesshoumaru's tongue flickered teasingly across his lips. A low moan tore free of his throat and he gave himself over to it, mentally telling himself to shut up and stop over-analyzing.

Sesshoumaru suddenly yanked back as if Inuyasha had caught fire, the noise startling him. He stared at Inuyasha in disbelief before scrambling to his feet. His look was frozen between panic and horror. The taiyoukai mumbled something - probably some sort of explanation or apology - before practically running from the room. Inuyasha was left on his back, propping himself up on his elbows and blinking, his mind in a daze as he tried to figure out what the hell had just happened.


	23. Chapter 22

Pride (In the Name of Love) 22 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - For all you Sesshy / Inu fans out there - chill. BELIEVE ME, I've never written a fic that didn't ultimately end up in lemon territory. This one is taking longer than usual to get there, but...well, I don't want it to be about gratuitous sex. There is a plot, there are big things afoot - the romance will occur eventually. And Sesshy has some SERIOUS issues regarding such physical intimacy at the moment. Baby steps. I'll get a little more into his head...mm, about now....

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How had this disaster come about?

// Mad... I am going mad. First I find myself loving a girl...a tender, delicate, fragile, vulnerable, weak, HUMAN...girl. And then in the next breath, this...this thing...with a hanyou. My only living relative, of all beings. Have I truly lost myself so much? Do I truly crave affection or attention or even friendship so desperately that I hurl myself at the mercies of the first beings to show me kindness? ... Mad. I am...going mad. //

Sesshoumaru slowly let his head sink down on his arms, which were folded on the desk before him. He did not know how to deal with the crazed whirlwind of emotions that tore through him. Confusion was not something he had felt many times in his life. He had always been so very sure of himself. Confident. Even when something terrible occurred, even if it was drastic, his mind had cut cleanly to the bone of the matter and he had dealt with it, for good or ill.

There was no agonizing over difficult choices. His intuition was razor-sharp. He seldom made mistakes. What few he did make, he had always recovered from swiftly.

No, confusion and hesitation and being...at such a loss...these were things that were unfamiliar to Sesshoumaru. The thin, trembling crystal thread of his sanity vibrated at a painfully high pitch - he was afraid that the smallest movement would cause it to shatter into a thousand glassy shards and leave him a gibbering, drooling wreck.

What had POSSIBLY possessed him to kiss Inuyasha? His mind had had no part in the decision. His body had moved on its own accord. The hanyou had been stretched out so perfectly beneath him...his voice had been soft, his words crude but laced with grudging affection and maybe more. Sesshoumaru hadn't even realized he'd moved, given in to the primal desire to taste the hanyou's lips against his own, until Inuyasha had made a noise. That tiny noise had snapped his consciousness out of it's stupor and brought him back to reality with the force of an icy tidal wave.

But he had liked it. Oh, it had been delicious...and he couldn't place why. Sesshoumaru had his pick of lovers and prospective mates. Uncountable youkai - and more than a few hanyou and humans - would have and had killed just for the chance of offering themselves up to him. Some sought his power...some his lands, his protection...some his heart-wrenching, icy beauty. He had never spared them a glance. None of them were his equal. None of them deserved his touch. None of them had even been worthy to stand in his presence. Groveling, simpering, pathetic or foolish...there had been a reason for all of them to be rejected. His pride had kept them all away.

Sesshoumaru, for all his power and pride and beauty, for all the centuries he had walked the earth, had been a virgin before Tsetsukosei had taken him. He had never found anyone he would have considered letting touch him. He had assumed he would know the touch of whatever mate he took when the time was right - until then, he would not give in to something as foolish as his mindless libido and physical desire. In his aloof and distant, tightly controlled world, he had simply decided sex was not important. His iron control was more than sufficient to dominate and bury the hormones that raged against his will. Eventually, they were subdued and troubled him no further, freezing alongside the rest of the emotions he had thought buried in the depths of his icy soul.

How had it come to this? How could one demon rip his world asunder? How could this one, solitary beast take all that he knew and all that he had made himself and so utterly, irrevocably tear it all down? Everything Sesshoumaru knew and was seemed a feeble lie now.

All his pride, all his world, sacrificed in the name of love.

That was the heart of it, wasn't it? The cardinal sin of his Lord Father...a history he had unwittingly been doomed to repeat. His father had died in the name of love, love for his human mate and their newborn pup. And despite all his scorn, despite every thought and feeling against it all that he had ever had...when the dark beast had come to claim Rin...he had willingly given himself over for her.

The fact that his brother had come for him still had the power to surprise the taiyoukai. He had no friends - he had never allowed himself any. The way he had treated Inuyasha in the past was downright cruel at times. Sesshoumaru had never expected to see the light of day again. He had not thought he would ever again be his own creature, but would simply be tormented and tortured until there was nothing left of him. His mind and his consciousness would flicker and die...but it had all been alright, because he had spared Rin that fate. Nothing should steal the light and innocence from that bright and happy creature.

Especially not him. To love her would be to destroy her. He was a demon lord, no matter the current circumstance. The sins he had committed without regret in his life were innumerable. He was a DEMON...his soul was dark and heavy and primal. It would consume her.

And so he had let her go. Despite all he had gone through for her, despite the sacrifices he had made...when the time finally had come that he could again bring her to his side...he had given her up and forced her from him. And oh, it ached inside and his demon was screaming at being denied...his mind was screaming out that he was a fool, and his heart...oh, how it burned. But he let her go.

In the name of love.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha frowned as he yanked open the front door of the palace. One of his advisors fluttered unhappily behind him, mumbling something about what a dreadful lack of decorum it was for the Lord to go to visitors instead of forcing them to come to him.

The simple truth of it was that Inuyasha couldn't sit still. He needed to GO somewhere, needed to DO something...ANYTHING...to get his mind off what had happened.

Sesshoumaru had kissed him. Inuyasha knew, from his startled reaction, that his brother probably hadn't meant it. It wasn't premeditated, it had just...happened. He didn't know if it was some sort of cry for attention, if it was a simple expression of lust and desire, a plea to be close to someone...

All the hanyou knew was that he had liked it a lot more than he should. The tiny noise he had been unable to bite back had broken the fragile spell, however, and Sesshoumaru had fled like a skittish kitten, his eyes unnaturally wide with shock.

// He tastes like he smells...that dry, unnameable spicy-sweet scent...//

"Lord Inuyasha."

Inuyasha was startled back to full attention. From the dark, less than warm look on his guest's face, he had the sneaking suspicion that he had been greeted more than once.

"Yeah, what are you doing here? We've got like ten different treaties, Lord Kanjiro. What in the hell is so important that the Eastern Lord himself shows up at my door?"

Kanjiro narrowed his eyes slightly, not approving of Inuyasha's distracted and none-too-respectful tone. Kanjiro was a powerful lord - indeed, the Eastern Lands were second only to their Western neighbor - and he was not used to being brushed off. However, he gripped his diplomacy tightly about him like a shield. "May I come in?"

"Yeah, sure..." Inuyasha muttered, stepping aside so the Eastern Lord could enter, along with his personal guard. They traveled to the throne room and Inuyasha plunked himself unceremoniously into the massive seat. He really wasn't in the mood to entertain guests. Especially tricky and powerful ones. They made him uneasy. "So whaddaya want? I got a lot of things on my mind."

"Rumors have come to my attention that the former Lord Sesshoumaru did not, in fact, perish in the assault that left you as heir to this throne."

Inuyasha's ears flicked forward - he was giving Kanjiro his full attention now. This particular neko youkai could cause him no little amount of trouble if he desired. How anyone had heard that Sesshoumaru was alive already, however, baffled Inuyasha.

"Supposing the rumors you've heard are true, what does it matter?"

"Are you saying that you are maintaining this title despite the presence of Sesshoumaru?" Kanjiro arched an eyebrow. Interesting...either Sesshoumaru was significantly weaker than he had thought, to be thus bested by a hanyou -unlikely...or this hanyou was much more powerful than he had guessed. Although there could be something else afoot entirely - Kanjiro did not like it.

"All you need to know is that I'm the Western Lord beyond question. Whether or not LORD Sesshoumaru is alive and well, present or not, is not your concern. I am more than fit to rule in his stead or in his absence."

Kanjiro bowed slightly. "Ah. Of course, Lord Inuyasha. I simply wished to know. It would be terribly awkward, you see, if the great Lord Inu no Taisho's heir was alive and well and yet not in possession of his throne, as his father had wished. Your brother was not loved, but he was respected."

"And you don't respect me. Because I'm a hanyou, most likely. If you have too much of a problem with it, then bring it on. Otherwise, get the fuck out and go home, I'm not about to gossip with you or let you snoop."

Kanjiro blinked - Inuyasha was very coarse and blunt. However, those that had thus far tried to dethrone him had failed and met bitter ends. The hanyou WAS powerful, and that sword he wore so easily was said to be able to fell a hundred demons in one stroke. Truly a mighty gift that the Inu no Taisho had left his younger son!

Inuyasha was relieved when the neko youkai bowed deeply and apologized for any inconveniences or unintentional insults he may have delivered, and was escorted out. The hanyou sagged in relief - he really had had no idea how to deal with that. If it had come to a fight, he wasn't entirely sure he could have won. His chief advisor had informed him that Sesshoumaru and Kanjiro had fought like...well, cats and dogs. Sesshoumaru had always bested the neko, but had never come away unscathed.

// Meh, I have to get Sessh running this place again. I don't envy him the position at all. It sounds great and wonderful...be king of a huge country!...but it's a fuck of a lot more headache and work than its worth. I HATE politics... Speaking of Sessh, maybe I can corner him after lunch so we can go over a plan to try and kill the slimy bastard that caused all of this trouble in the first place. I'd rather go now, but...I think he needs his space. Damn it. Why does everything have to be so confusing? I miss running around in my forest and only having to worry about what to eat for dinner and which tree to sleep in. Everything was so much simpler. //


	24. Chapter 23

Pride (In the Name of Love) 23 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Ah, Inuyasha the diplomat and political genius, right? XD I'm sure he made a good impression on Sesshy's chief rival from the East there. Good job, mate.

Now, I'm not about to disappoint my fanbase here...I promised some Sesshy-Inu action and so there will be. Eventually, when the time is right. But do keep in mind that I...for whatever reason, I don't understand it myself, being the hardcore yaoi fan I always have been - I am actually a fan of Sesshy / Rin. That is not to say I dislike Inu / Sesshy in any way - quite the contrary. But don't expect me to just write Rin out either. =P For the fans it may be, but I'm my number one fan. So ha. XD This is not to say that this story is ultimately going to end up as Sesshy / Rin either. Who the hell knows how this will evolve. I'm just wingin' it.

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Cornering Sesshoumaru for lunch turned out to be more of a feat than Inuyasha had thought it would be. The taiyoukai didn't show up on his own, nor did he call to order food from the kitchen. Inuyasha went on a hunt for his older brother and probably wouldn't have found him if he hadn't gotten lucky. Generally he was able to track by scent, but his brother had lived here so long and even still wandered the halls so much that everything pretty much smelled like him.

Inuyasha had been about to give up on his search when he caught a flash of silver vanishing around the corner at the opposite end of the hallway. With a triumphant crow, he darted down said hall and out the doorway that was there - it lead into one of the castle's many gardens.

Sesshoumaru had settled himself down on a rock overlooking a small pond filled with brightly-colored fish. He didn't bother to look up when Inuyasha bounced over and crouched next to him. "Whatcha doin, Sessh?"

"Observing the fish."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Fine. Why are you 'observing the fish'?"

"This Sesshoumaru desired a peaceful environment in which to contemplate my situation and my intended course of action."

Inuyasha's ears flicked and he made a face. "Why the hell can't you talk like a normal person?"

Sesshoumaru arched an eyebrow and peered at his brother. "Why can you not speak in a civilized manner befitting your station?"

"Keh... you didn't come to lunch, so I figured I'd come to you."

"Had I desired company, I would have joined you for lunch."

"Yeah, well...we don't have to talk about...what happened. But we do need to talk about that bastard lizard-thing."

"And the destruction thereof, yes. What is there to speak of? We must go, find this phylactery that Sairex spoke of, and destroy it."

"What's a phylaccy-whatsit look like?"

"It can be any object that Tsetsukosei desired. Something elaborate or something as simple as a pebble."

"Fucking great. How will we know it when we see it then?"

"I would assume it is carefully guarded, although well-hidden. It is likely that the object radiates power, so efforts would be made to subdue said power and make it simpler to hide."

"Great....so we won't know what the fuck to look for and won't know it when we see it. Awesome."

"On the contrary. We should not look for the presence of an object of such power, but rather the lack of presence."

Inuyasha's ears flattened back as he tried to follow his brother's logic. "Eh?"

Sesshoumaru smirked. "I am not overly proficient with power of the sort Tsetsukosei utilizes. However, the entire realm seems to be infused with some level of energy. So rather than seek out an object that radiates power but is almost guaranteed to be shielded...we search his fortress for a...hole...in the energy field. A place where the power seems less than the area around it."

"Sessh, you really are a fucking genius."

"Hn. SOMEONE had to inherit the brains of our Lord Father."

"And someone had to inherit his good looks." Inuyasha smirked.

"Yes, although I suppose that didn't leave much for you."

"Oh, very funny." Inuyasha took a half-hearted swipe at Sesshoumaru, who of course dodged it easily. Inuyasha was very surprised a moment later when his brother retaliated - by using his mokomoko to scoop up and fling a sizeable quantity of water at the hanyou. Inuyasha spluttered in shock. "Hey!"

Before the dripping hanyou could retaliate, however, Sesshoumaru had vanished up into one of the several willows dotting the courtyard. Inuyasha squinted through the drooping branches. He let out a startled yelp as he suddenly was snapped from behind by a wet mokomoko.

Sesshoumaru smirked, the wet furry length twitching around him. Inuyasha growled, his ears flattening back. "You are SUCH an asshole..."

"I've had a long time to perfect it. And if I am to stand thus accused, I may as well reap the benefits and live up to the title."

"Yeah, yeah, whatev--SHIT! SESSH!" Inuyasha yelped and scrambled for his Tetsusaiga, leaping forward. Sesshoumaru whirled, hands flying to the hilt of Toukijin. Almost as soon as he began to turn, however, Sesshoumaru realized he'd been had. Before he could get out of range, Inuyasha had snagged his clothes and dropped something squirmy down his back. "HAH!"

Sesshoumaru gave Inuyasha a baleful glare and hefted his blade. "I should use this on you for that..." He sheathed Toukijin so he could begin digging into his clothing, trying to extricate the cold, flopping critter from his back. He finally pulled out the small fish. "Hn..."

"You're just jealous cause you didn't think of it first."

"You do not want to see what places this Sesshoumaru could shove this fish before you could stop me, Inuyasha." He held aloft the squirming little creature threateningly. Instead of violently forcing it somewhere on his brother, however, he released it in the pond. "Hn. Abusing my fish..."

"Hey, you were the one that threw it at me with that stupid furry thing of yours!"

"Mokomoko-sama is NOT a 'stupid furry thing'."

"Yeah, yeah...whatever..."

Sesshoumaru smirked triumphantly. "You are just jealous that you do not have one."

"What the hell would I do with a furball gone wrong like that?"

Sesshoumaru sighed. "Truly you have no imagination, little brother."

"I stuck a fish down your shirt and you say I have no imagination."

"Admittedly that's a first for me...come, lets go inside. We have preparations to make."

Inuyasha grinned. "Alright...truce, for now..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"DAMN you, you feathered bastard! TELL ME HOW THEY GOT OUT!"

"Kaa...Zetsukosei..." Sairex scowled and spit out a mouthful of blood, a sardonic smirk on his face. "You KNOW I'm not going to tell you a DAMN ting."

"No one besides you has ever escaped me before, Sairex. Of course, no one ended up with YOUR help either. I know portals cannot be opened from THIS side...I've made sure its quite impossible to undo my wards against such things without the proper knowledge. Knowledge that even YOU don't have for all your cunning."

"Knowledge I never bothered to try to get. Vhat da hell good does a portal I can't use do me? I can't leave dis damn place and you know it."

"Be that as it may..." Zetsukosei tightened his grip on Sairex's right wing, grinning at the satisfying cracks and crunches of delicate bones breaking. The raven youkai winced, his pale face going a shade or two whiter and his lips pulling into a thin line, but he didn't make a sound. "...A portal was opened nonetheless. So that means...someone on the outside was involved. The inu do not possess the appropriate sort of magic. Hmm...so, whom did you show how to break in here, little bird?"

"Even if your theory is correct, Zetsukosei...I vill die before I zpeak."

"Hn. You know I can't kill you. Oh, I'd dearly love to...perhaps it would wipe that smirk off your face or teach you a few manners. But as you are bound to me, so too am I bound to you. I trusted you once when I cast that damnable spell."

"Den ya go and destroy my damn life!"

Tsetsukosei growled dangerously and snatched Sairex by the throat, slamming him back against the hard stone wall painfully. Sairex bit his lip as the impact jarred his broken wing and cracked the other one. "Tell...me. Or I will TAKE the information from you!"

Sairex narrowed his eyes. "You vouldn't dare. And risk all else I know? Risk losing to me? Kaa, a pleasing prospect. By all means...challenge me."

"Oh, little bird, you may be spiritually strong, but you forget...you are hindered here. You cannot harm me." Tsetsukosei made sure his grip was secure before closing his eyes. Despite his bold and angry words, he knew the raven was a formidable opponent - indeed, one he would never face on a fair playing field. Even on this sorely tilted battleground, the risk was tremendous.

Sairex growled and thrashed madly as Tsetsukosei forced open a mental connection. The raven was enraged - he knew he could defeat the demon beast in any normal circumstance, but he could not do so without harming him. It was impossible to block his entry.

The raven was still alive in a hostile world because he knew how to choose his battles. When he realized he would be unable to keep Tsetsukosei from entering his mind and rummaging about, he instead turned his attention to erecting some interior defenses. Tsetsukosei might learn some things, but the raven's deeper secrets would be his own.

However, it was only a matter of time before Tsetsukosei figured out what he wanted to know. There was nothing Sairex could do to keep him from finding the links he had to Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, and Miroku. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were no secret - Tsetsukosei already knew about them, where they were, everything. Miroku was another matter. Without the monk, there was no way for them to get back and forth.

Sairex cursed roundly and threw all the barriers he could at Tsetsukosei. He erected extra barriers around meaningless bits of information to buy some time and draw the dracolich's attention in the wrong direction, and then sent his mind flying across the realms.

// MIROKU! //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku let out a startled yelp and almost fell on his face. He had just finished a very satisfying meditation session and was in the process of standing up when Sairex's desperate mental cry reached him.

// Sairex? What is it? //

// Listen to me, monk, and listen to me carefully. Zetsukosei is in my mind, and zoon he vill be coming for you. He vill destroy you. He knows someone has been helping me help da Inu no Taizho's zons. //

// Great...what should I do? Is there some way I can defend against him? //

// Kaa...he von't care for your existence...you're human. He'll burn out your zoul. // Sairex's distress was evident, and his words did VERY little to make Miroku feel better - indeed, it was rather the opposite.

// Lovely...so is this your way of saying goodbye? //

// Miroku, do you trust me? //

// What? //

// Do you trust me?! And more, do you trust your friends? Quickly, I have no time! //

// Of course I trust my friends! I'd trust them with my life. And...I've trusted you with more than that before. So yes. //

// Don't fight me, den....and I'm zorry for what I must do. //

Miroku blinked and relaxed mentally as much as he was able. He had no idea what Sairex was planning, but he had been truthful. He trusted the raven. After all, Sairex had had ample opportunity to destroy him utterly and hadn't so much as mentally scratched him.

Miroku felt Sairex's blazing entry into his mind. It was a bit more forceful and urgent than previously, but the monk still didn't see the need for the raven's warnings...

Sairex had no time to be delicate about the matter - indeed, he had no idea if what he was doing was even going to work. He very well might be destroying all that made the monk tick...but it was a necessary risk. If he didn't try, Miroku was doomed anyways.

Miroku gasped in sudden, searing agony. He felt his spirit being roughly severed from his body. Instinctively he tried to struggle, but it was far too late. He fell to his knees with a choked gurgle that had been meant to be a scream. His consciousness blanked out and he briefly was aware of leaving his body. The empty shell toppled to the ground, bleeding from the ears...eyes wide open and sightless.

The raven had stolen his soul.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"What have you done, bird?!" Tsetsukosei screamed in rage. He had sensed the monk's presence suddenly, and all of it had made sense...and then the monk's existence simply blinked out.

Miroku realized with a start that he could see again, although his vision was far sharper than normal. It took him a few moments before he thought to question it. He slowly examined himself mentally. //...Sairex? //

// Oh, good...you made it. Velcome to my body...I can protect you here. Although, my apologies...you vill have to feel vhat I feel...vhich isn't a pleasant prospect at da moment...// "Vhat have I done? Oh, you mean da monk. Zorry, he's beyond your reach now and forever."

Tsetsukosei roared in angry defiance, shaking the raven's petite frame as if he were a rag doll. Each shake slammed him against the wall and it ultimately left him seeing stars. "SAIREXXXX! YOU HAVE DEFIED ME FOR THE LAST TIME!"

"Unlikely..." the raven muttered. Miroku winced inwardly - life was not going to be very good for a time.

// I hope my friends get you...er...us....out of here soon. //

// As do I. If dey don't hurry, your body vill die and you'll be stuck vith me for good. //

// Much as I like you, my friend, I'm rather partial to having my own body. //

// And I rather enjoy having myzelf to myzself. I'll do vhat I can to keep vhat he does from affecting you much...I'm zorry to bring you into dis. //

// You saved me the only way you could. I'm grateful. //

Sairex glanced up at the thunderous, animal rage gleaming in Tsetsukosei's smoky crimson eyes. // You might not be saying dat zoon... //


	25. Chapter 24

Pride (In the Name of Love) 24 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mm...not much to say this time. ^^ Enjoy your chapter.

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Miroku wondered distantly how much he would have suffered had he not been somewhat isolated by Sairex's defenses. Either way, the pain had been excruciating, surely beyond his tolerance as a human. Sairex was wheezing faintly from his place on the floor, his lungs having a hard time inflating properly around smashed bones. Tsetsukosei had taken out his massive rage on the raven youkai until he had exhausted himself.

Sairex seemed to be dealing with it alright, however - he apparently knew some techniques to distance himself from his physical body. Mentally, he had been kicked back next to Miroku and watching his body being ravaged as if it were someone else's.

// You really have to teach me how to do that, Sairex. I'd lose focus and be back in the thick of it...//

// Oh, I vill...but not right now. Right now I have to vatch your friends very closely. //

// Really?...Why is that? //

// Vhen dey come for you, I have to animate your body zo I can get dem a portal here and explain tings, unless you fancy remaining part of my zubconscious for da rest of your days. //

// Ah. I see your point. Oh well. I can think of less pleasant people to be locked up with. //

Sairex chuckled mentally. // Vhy, I'm touched...you flatter me, Zir Monk. //

It was Miroku's turn to be amused. // Oh, now flattery...that's something I'm VERY good at. I've had plenty of practice. //

// Is dat zo? Not a zkill most properly humble monks practice... //

Miroku coughed. // Well, before we defeated the demon Naraku I was fairly convinced my time would be very short on this world. I had a void in my hand. A wind tunnel. It was a curse passed down through my family. Part of the reason I started traveling was...er... well, I wanted a child to carry on my name and my quest before the void grew and swallowed me up as it did my father before me. So I went looking for a willing woman...er...ANY...willing woman. I didn't meet with much success though... //

// No? Vhat vould you do to attempt to zeduce dem? // Sairex asked, amused. He knew Miroku would be blushing by now if the monk had had that capability.

// Well...er...I'd introduce myself and ask if they would be willing to bear my child. Occasionally ... er... my hand would have a life of its own and grope inappropriately.... //

Sairex blinked....then blinked again...before bursting into laughter. // Ohhh, you are zo zubtle...no vonder tings didn't vork out for you... //

Miroku scowled petulantly. // Well, I didn't have a lot of time. Urgent quests and saving the world and all that. A real courtship would have taken a lot longer than I ever seemed to have. //

// Are you zure? Perhaps you zimply aren't practiced in da art of true zeduction. //

// Hah...I could charm the feathers right off of you, bird. //

// I don't zeem to have many left after dat last round vith Zetsukosei, but vhen ve get out of here, you're on. I vill allow you to attempt to zeduce me. In da unlikely event dat you zucceed, I'll zerve your every desire for a veek. Zhould you fail, you zerve my vhims instead. //

// Deal. But I get a week to make the attempt to overwhelm you with the sheer power of my personal magnetism. //

Sairex snickered. // Yeah, yeah....and I promise to react fairly. But don't you go around tinking I'm easily von over. //

// Good. I like a good challenge. I doubt I'll even need a whole week. //

// Kaa, zo cocky. Mm. I look forward to it, it vill be funny to vatch you try. But you'll have to excuse me a moment, Inuyazha zeems to have found your body. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were both in fairly good moods when they entered the castle. They settled down at a table and Sesshoumaru drew a basic layout of the fortress in surprising detail - his mind had cataloged most everything in his time there. The two went over the map and examined areas they thought would be more likely to hide something of worth.

"So what do we do about all the little bastards running around? Kill em or avoid em?"

Sesshoumaru mulled it over. "I've no doubt they would be simple enough to destroy, but if we DO eradicate them we run the risk of alerting Tsetsukosei to our presence before we're ready. I think we should make effort to circumvent them and only kill those that actually are aware of us."

Inuyasha nodded. "Sounds like a plan...although I can't say I'm overly fond of the whole stealth operation sort of thing."

"Subtlety has never been your strong suit, no...in fact, you're about as subtle as a sack of rocks to the face."

"Keh, who needs to be subtle?"

"You are truly not suited to be a political leader."

"Yeah, the cat didn't think so either."

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed. "Cat?..."

"Eh...Eastern Lord."

Sesshoumaru flew to his feet. "Kanjiro was here?! When? What did he want? What did you TELL him?"

"Jeez, relax. He was just pissy that I was still in charge because he claimed he heard some rumor that you were still around."

Sesshoumaru frowned darkly. Kanjiro was a crafty rival, always prying for information and applying a great deal of the subtlety and treachery Inuyasha despised so much. And if he knew Sesshoumaru was alive... "You apparently do not understand, Inuyasha. We can not both be lord of this land, but if it is known that I live, there are few ways that you have any right to rule unless you have...subjugated me."

"Er...so why don't you just rule again?..."

Sesshoumaru sighed. "I have already explained this and this Sesshoumaru does not repeat himself."

"So...you'd rather have everyone think I kicked your ass and made you serve me?"

Sesshoumaru growled softly at the thought, his fists clenching slowly. "Hn. We will deal with this when we return. I...NEED...to destroy Tsetsukosei as soon as possible."

Inuyasha shrugged and nodded. "Sure. I'm ready to go whenever you are...and I'm assuming that'd be now. Let's go find Miroku, eh?"

The two of them silently made their way down the hall to Miroku's quarters. Inuyasha rapped sharply on the door. "Hey, monk!"

When he received no response, Inuyasha scowled and sniffed - Miroku's scent was strong. He had to be in there. Without any further ado, Inuyasha flung open the door. "Mir-- Shit!"

Miroku lay in a crumbled heap on the floor, his eyes wide and staring. A good deal of blood had already leaked from his ears, although it seemed to have stopped a while ago and was starting to dry.

Inuyasha thought his friend was dead. However, he caught the slight motion of the monk's chest as he breathed "Miroku?" he asked hesitantly, crouching and pulling the limp form into his arms. Looking into Miroku's eyes, he was reminded of an expression he had heard Kagome use - the lights are on, but no one's home. The monk's eyes were flat and dead. Inuyasha suddenly had a disturbing vision of a pair of golden eyes he'd looked into several times that were equally devoid of any spark. He flicked a glance to his brother.

Sesshoumaru was staring at Miroku's limp form, his thoughts whirling. // If this monk is broken... I can not be free of that beast... //

Both of the brothers were shaken out of their separate thoughts when Miroku's eyes blinked and his body moved.

"Miroku! You're alive!"

"Kaa...he is alive, yes...but he's not here."

"Sairex? What the hell is going on?"

Sairex-Miroku frowned and sat up slowly. "Zetsukosei found out how you vere traveling betveen vorlds. Da only vay I could tink of to protect Miroku's zoul vas to zteal it and hide it from da beast vhere he couldn't reach it."

"That asshole was after Miroku?" Inuyasha growled.

Sesshoumaru squinted. "Where did you put his soul, raven?"

Sairex grinned half-heartedly. "Miroku is currently zharing my body vith me. I'm protecting him vith my own mental zhielding."

Inuyasha frowned. "Wait...protecting him from Tsetsukosei? Oh SON of a BITCH! I KNEW you were going to do something stupid! I KNEW IT!"

"Kaaa, be dat as it may...you have to hurry. Dis body von't zurvive long vithout a zoul. You'll find me...us, I zuppose I zhould zay...in da dungeon. Vhen you get dere, I'll help you in person however I can." Even as he spoke, Sairex was weaving open a portal.

When he finished, he moved to lay down on Miroku's bed, getting comfortable. "I'll be vaiting vith Miroku for you. Be careful. You zhould have a bit of time, however...Zetsukosei is exhausted and resting right now."

Inuyasha nodded. "Alright. You two...hang in there. We'll be there soon."

Sesshoumaru glanced at the portal, unable to stop the shiver that clawed its way up his spine. He was really going back to that place... really going to face off against that...that fiend. A low whine tore itself free of his throat, but he didn't notice, just as he didn't notice the trembling plaguing his body. His mind was reeling off in a mad spiral of panic, stealing his breath and his thoughts.

Inuyasha glanced up abruptly at the taiyoukai's soft whine. His eyes flew wide when he saw the wide-eyed terror sinking its claws deeper and deeper into Sesshoumaru. "Sessh?....Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru snapped to his senses abruptly, his gaze darting to his brother, then to the ground. He flushed, ashamed of his pathetic reaction.

Inuyasha frowned and walked over before hesitantly putting his hand on his brother's shoulder. "Hey...if its...I mean...if you don't want to go, you don't have to. No one's making you."

Sesshoumaru gave a dangerous growl to show he did not approve of the unspoken acknowledgment of his weakness, nor the accusation that it would be too hard for him. He abruptly stalked into the portal.

"Oye...take care of dat brother of yours, Inuyazha...and yourzelf. He's right to be afraid, and you don't zeem afraid enough."

"It's just a demon, Sairex. Sure, he's a badass and he's big, but he's just another demon."

"No, he really isn't. Zetsukosei is in a class all by himself. Be careful. Now go, before Zezzhoumaru gets himzelf in trouble...neither of you zhould be alone dere."

"Alright. Seeya soon, when we bust ya out." Inuyasha grinned and then hurried through the portal after his brother.


	26. Chapter 25

Pride (In the Name of Love) 25 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - In response to the question on who would be alpha in an Inu/Sesshy relationship despite Sesshy's line in the last chapter about there being only one lord and Inuyasha having to subjugate him to be said lord - I do not believe I could write a Sesshy-uke in a relationship of his choosing. However, he was referring to the lands themselves in that regard - if Inuyasha stays lord, he has to let people believe Inuyasha defeated him and took the title by force. Their relationship might not be so publically broadcast.

There IS a ...er... citrus-y scene in this chapter? I'm really not sure how to label it appropriately. It's a little difficult to define. You'll see what I mean when you get there. It wasn't where I intended to take this chapter originally but it was too good to pass up.

And for the record - I planned a big Plot Element for this chapter but when I got writing it it just kinda...got sidetracked. I didn't expect things to turn out this way...consider it an Easter gift.

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Sesshoumaru was waiting for Inuyasha just on the other side of the portal. It had opened into a secluded storage room on the far end of the fortress and deep underground. Inuyasha took careful stock of his brother's condition. Sesshoumaru was visibly on edge, flinching at the tiniest sound his brother made. Inuyasha knew that Sesshoumaru did NOT want to be in this place for ANY reason, despite his reaction and how assertive he had been storming in here.

Before the hanyou could say anything, however, Sesshoumaru swallowed his emotions, his voice soft and flat. "Let us begin our search. This fortress is large and it may take more than the day simply to get to the dungeons if we are being cautious and searching rooms as we go."

Inuyasha frowned. "Mrr. Wouldn't it be easier to look if we had Sairex with us?"

"If it is as he says, he needs some time to heal and recover regardless. I do not fancy dragging around an incapacitated demon while trying to remain undetected."

"Good point. I just...hate leavin' him there. And we have to hurry for Miroku's sake."

"Dehydration is the biggest threat to his body's continued living, which gives us a few days to work with. We should not be here near that long."

Inuyasha nodded in agreement, and the two set out to do a careful search, room by room and item by item, on their way to the dungeon.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

// So they're here somewhere, eh? //

// Of course dey are. Vhy vouldn't dey be? But to be more zpecific... // Sairex stood up and stretched slowly. // Dey are in da Vest Ving. It vill be a vhile before dey get to us. //

The raven sighed, glad that his body had healed. It hadn't taken as long as he feared - Tsetsukosei had gone surprisingly easy on him despite the pain. The wounds had been largely superficial, the bones cracked but mostly unbroken.

// Oh. Well, as long as they're being careful. // Miroku responded after a moment.

// Dey certainly zeem to be. //

// Do you realize I still have no idea what you look like? // Miroku flashed Sairex a mental grin. // I've been in your body, you've been in mine, and I've yet to see you. //

Sairex chuckled. // Dis is true. Vhat, afraid you made a bad choice to zeduce me? //

// Of course not. I am not so shallow. Although... hmm. //

// Vhat? //

// How much control do I actually have over this body right now? //

Sairex contemplated for a long moment. // As much as I allow you. Vhy, do you feel da need to ztretch or zomething? //

// Something like that. Being disembodied isn't something I'm used to. //

//Vell, if I didn't trust you I vouldn't have let you in in da first place. Go ahead. // Sairex mentally took a back seat and allowed Miroku control.

Miroku inspected as much of his form as he was able to see. It felt so strange - he was incredibly light on his feet. Unfamiliar muscles twitched in his back - wing muscles, he supposed. // Hmm. I've never had wings before. //

// Vell, maybe vhen dis is over, I'll let you go flying. //

// That would be incredible. Hmm... so you can feel everything I do, can you? //

Sairex was starting to grow suspicious. // Vhat are you up to?... //

Miroku grinned widely and teasingly as he sat down comfortably, idly trailing slender fingers over his chest. // I thought I might start my seduction early. //

// ... Monk, you are a fiend. You can not POSSIBLY be zerious....! //

Miroku smirked even wider and allowed one hand to slide down over Sairex's thin, willowy body, dropping teasingly low on his stomach and drawing a startled mental gasp from the raven. Sairex tried to say several different things at once but all that ended up coming across was a jumble of shock and disbelief that Miroku had taken over his body for something like THIS! The raven was surprised enough that he simply forgot to demand Miroku give his body back to his control.

Miroku slowly ran his hand between his legs, letting out a shuddering gasp. It was an incomparably strange and yet erotic sensation. It felt at the same time as if he was touching himself, touching a lover, and being touched by someone else. The feeling was both very solid and real and yet echoed and distant, and it confused his senses entirely.

Desire had welled up in him so strongly that he had been a bit taken aback. Miroku was an equal-opportunity flirt - if it moved, chances are good he would flirt with it - and sometimes even if it didn't - but he had never REALLY lusted for another male.

He had nothing against the idea. His mind had logically considered the situation, even, and dismissed it without much thought. He simply hadn't ever encountered a male that stirred his blood or attracted him. Even his bet with Sairex had been more for fun than out of any serious desire to seduce the raven - it had been something of an unspoken agreement between them.

And then everything changed in a sudden flash. Miroku suddenly found himself lusting for the raven, wanting that slender, delicate form crushed against his own as they writhed together in shared ecstasy. The part that made his sudden passion so inflamed, however, was the clear knowledge that his 'roommate' felt the same way for him, just as suddenly and just as wildly. It was as if some hidden floodgate had been smashed open and the ensuing rush consumed them both with surprising fury.

Despite his sudden desire, in all honesty, Miroku hadn't intended to go so far as he already had. He had meant to simply threaten such an intimate touch in jest. But the strange mirrored sensations had drawn him on. He was fascinated by the pale skin and beautiful body beneath his unfamiliar fingertips. Sairex was helpless to stop him, but Miroku did not feel at all like he was taking advantage - after all, he could feel Sairex's reactions as strongly as if they were his own. In some ways, at this moment, they were. That in and of itself was an intimate bonding experience beyond anything he had ever expected. He knew more about Sairex's emotions and all the things that made him who he was than he would have been likely to discover in a whole lifetime if left on his own. There simply was no good way to hide most of what made them tick when they had become one in so many ways.

Miroku wasted little time in unfastening his pants and pushing them over his hips. Idly he noted the strange and delicate lines of Sairex's tattoos swirling down his hips, but that was hardly his main focus. Sairex voiced one token mental protest that was in obvious disagreement with what he truly wanted. A throaty moan escaped his throat as he closed his fingers around his cock. The sound itself inflamed Miroku's senses - hearing that delicious sound in Sairex's silky voice threatened to undo him. Unconsciously his fingers tightened around his shaft, milking its length. Soon his hips arched as he thrust against his hand, his mind lost in a fiery blaze of passion that dwarfed anything he had ever felt before.

He had once had every good intention of taking his time and enjoying himself, but the sensory overload was more than he could bear. His free hand dug into the stone floor, talon-like nails raking ineffectually against the hard surface. In his mind, lost in an equal haze of shared sensation and pleasure, Sairex writhed mentally. It was impossible for them to tell their own feelings apart.

Miroku suddenly had a very sharp and crystal-clear image of this beautiful creature stretched out beneath him...these long and slender legs wrapped around him so tightly as he thrust his aching erection into this tight, lithe body...these talons scraping down his back, wings shuddering and curling inward as devastating waves of pleasure crashed through them both...hearing Sairex's beautiful voice with its quirky and somehow sexy accent screaming for him, begging him for more...

Sairex gasped at the clarity of the image Miroku drew up, helpless to do anything but tremble in desperate need. Oh, how much he wanted to make that fantasy a reality, especially at this point...wanted it with an intensity that shocked him and left him reeling further. His mental 'protests' - if they could ever have been called that - had melted into nonsensical pleas for more. Oh, he was undone...shattered, sacrificed at the altar of this human's passions.

Miroku groaned, biting his lip as his hips snapped up sharply. His entire world condensed to one tiny, intense spark...a pinprick of brilliant light. Without warning, the spark exploded in a million glimmering shards. Miroku let out a sharp cry in a voice not his own as his orgasm crashed over him, stealing his breath and bowing his back as his muscles convulsed. As the last twitches slowly fluttered through his muscles, Miroku sank bonelessly back against the wall. Idly he lifted his hand to his lips and flicked his tongue out. // Mm...I wonder if you'll taste the same when I'm in my own body... //

// Dis...doesn't count towards your zeduction...it vas entirely unfair...// Sairex was blushing mentally as he fought to recover his senses, and it amused Miroku to no end.

// You loved every moment of it. //

// You cheated. //

// Fair enough... but dear gods, I couldn't resist you when I started...it was...the strangest and most intense thing I've ever felt in my life. //

// I understand. I vas dere, too, remember? //

// I'll never forget it. //

// Don't you go tinking dis vill help you vin your bet, monk... //

// Oh, I don't...I just couldn't resist you. You're beautiful. I can't wait to see all of you next time. //

// Vhat makes you tink dere vill be a next time? // Sairex asked, fighting hard to control the blush that immediately stained his cheeks as Miroku relinquished control of his body back to him.

// Oh, there will be. There will be. //


	27. Chapter 26

Pride (In the Name of Love) 26 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Yeah, I think one of my lovely reviewers said it best - 25 chapters and Miroku has not yet been slapped for his wandering hand? XD Although, due to the....unique circumstances, I don't think Sairex will slap him. It'd be more personally painful than it's worth.

And in response to another question... I never said an Inu-Sesshy relationship wasn't ultimately the focus of this story. o.O But regardless, I cannot write Sesshy as a willing uke. I just can't logically see it. Even now, damaged as he is... I can't see him being anyone's bitch unless forced. So to speak.

And now, on with the chapter I *intended* to be yesterday's before that little...Miroku / Sairex escapade that was too amusing an idea to pass up.

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Having come up clueless, Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru eventually came to the conclusion that their time would be better spent with someone who was more in tune with looking for this sort of thing and they sped up their trip to the dungeons. It took a bit of searching - apparently, Tsetsukosei's network of dungeons and torture chambers was excessive - but they finally found Sairex. The raven was half dozing and slowly opened one yellow eye, a slight smile twitching his lips.

"Vell, it's about time."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes and helped Sairex to his feet. "Oh, how grateful you are. I should leave you here."

"You vouldn't do dat. You'd miss your monk too much. For da record, you didn't varn me dat he vas a complete pervert."

Inuyasha smirked. "I thought I'd let you discover Miroku's charms on your own. I had to."

"Yes, vell...it's one ting to discover dem vhen you travel together...it's quite another vhen he zhares your body."

Inuyasha snickered a bit. "Hey, it was all your doing. None of mine."

// I hate you all. // Miroku mentally stuck out his tongue, and Sairex chuckled.

// Oh, no you don't. In fact, you zeem to be quite enamored of me. //

"We do not have time for idle banter. We must make haste before we are discovered. Now that we have freed his prisoners, Tsetsukosei is not liable to remain unaware of our presence for long.

Inuyasha and Sairex sobered up abruptly. "Yeah, well...I guess we should start searching again."

Sairex scowled darkly as he tried to arrange what was left of his clothing into something a bit more decent and covering. "I can't zay I'm looking forvard to dis. I've been over dis castle a million times looking for da damn ting."

Sesshoumaru's intense glare narrowed. "We must find it. There is no other recourse."

"Yeah, ve vill look. Quickly. Speed is of da essence." So saying, the raven slid out of the room, ducking into the shadows so skillfully that Inuyasha nearly lost track of him, even though he knew where he had gone. His ears flattened as his brother followed suit, and he abruptly felt clumsy and ungraceful trying to match them.

The search dragged on. Room by room and item by item they checked. They also searched for any hints of hidden passages or concealed compartments, and while they found a couple none of them contained what they were searching for.

After spending the better part of the night searching - and dodging patrols - the three of them were very disheartened and frustrated. Sairex scowled and threw up his hands. "I just don't understand vhy I can't find it!"

"Eh, neither of us can either...."

"Yes, but I'm familiar vith Zetsukosei and his magic. I zhould be able to find zometing zo important to him easily. But no...not even da faintest hint of a clue. I'm missing zometing..."

"What are you missing, though? We were on the same search as you."

"I know, but....kaaa!" Sairex muttered in frustration. "Vhat could he pozzibly have used as a phylactery? Zometing he vould know I'd never tink to look for. Zometing dat vould always be close to him dat he vouldn't have to vorry about. Zomething dat he could bind to himzelf dat could never be taken from him, vouldn't be broken, and would never be free of him and--" Sairex stopped dead. Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru were both staring at him. The shocked look of revelation on the raven's face would have been comical if the situation wasn't so serious.

"Me...oh, dat bloody bastard... it's me."

Inuyasha frowned. "But..."

"It all makes zense...DAMN it..." Sairex slumped down in a chair, holding his head in his palms. Oh, but he felt like a fool...suddenly all the strange things that had happened over the centuries made sense. Why Tsetsukosei had never killed or seriously injured him despite his defiance and his outright attempts to piss the beast off....why every time Tsetsukosei did lose his patience and hurt him, the beast always seemed to tire of it so quickly... He had never understood what sort of bond, exactly, it had been...nor why Tsetsukosei would bind him in the first place. It had never made sense, but Sairex had simply assumed it was an attempt to force his loyalty and services and Tsetsukosei had never dissuaded him of that notion.

It also explained why he had never been able to get the slightest whiff of Tsetsukosei's phylactery. Of course he radiated spiritual energy. What better shield than to hide it in plain sight? Everyone would simply assume it was just his own magic coming to the fore.

This was why Tsetsukosei had never truly let him out of his sight but never went after him. And even on the off chance Sairex found out...to do anything about it, he would have to kill himself - and then he couldn't subsequently attack Tsetsukosei, giving the beast time to craft a new phylactery. Tsetsukosei had no other enemies that knew the full truth - or believed it, at least. All the missing puzzle pieces clicked into place - and like most of Tsetsukosei's plans, it was devious and terrifying in its simplicity.

Miroku's sudden alarm drowned out the slight bittersweet satisfaction Sairex felt at having figured it all out. // So...what....what do we do, Sairex? How can we get this spell off of you? // Simply the way Miroku asked the question let the raven know that he knew the answer.

// I'm zorry ve von't be able to make good on our bet, Miroku. I'll return you to your own body before ve do dis...Zetsukosei vill be too busy dying to tink to come for you. //

// NO! There HAS to be some other way, Sairex! //

// Knowing dat my death brings about Zetsukosei's is revard enough. Besides...I'll finally be free. //

Inuyasha frowned deeply. "What is it you.. I mean..."

"Vell, its zimple. I die, den you two can kill Zetsukosei." The hanyou looked horrified. "It's not so bad a ting..."

// I am...zo glad to have known you. Tank you for everyting, Miroku. // Miroku was about to launch another protest mentally when he suddenly found himself flying back through the void of space and time. He clutched at the raven's presence but before he knew it he was back in his own body, sitting up with a shuddering gasp that turned into a soft moan of denial.

Sairex sighed, looking sad for a moment before it vanished beneath a half-cocked smile. "Vell, dat's done. Your monk is back in his own body. So lets make dis quick zo you can go home, yes?"

Inuyasha flailed. "Sairex, no fucking way! You're our FRIEND. We can't just KILL you! You've helped us...probably saved our asses more than once...and now you want us to kill you just so we can kill that asshole? There has to be some other way."

Sairex looked pained. "Dere is no other vay. To destroy a phylactery, you have to break it. If Zetsukosei is bound to my life...and he is...den to destroy da bond and da ting itself, my life must be destroyed."

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

Inuyasha and Sairex both ignored the quiet clicking coming from Sesshoumaru's direction - for the most part. Inuyasha felt a brief spike of anger that h is brother wasn't helping argue his side - the proud bastard was probably thinking of the fastest way to kill the raven and get on with things! Sairex was simply unconcerned with Sesshoumaru and his response.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

"And there's no other way to kill Tsetsukosei?"

"You can't even cause him zerious harm vithout destroying his phylactery, Inuyazha. He is not alive. Pain and physical veaknesses are tings he gave up long ago."

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

Inuyasha frowned and then threw himself at the surprised raven, hugging him tightly. "Fuck...you're my friend. I can't...can't do this to you."

Sairex awkwardly tried to return the hug.

Tap. Tap. Tap. Tap.

Sesshoumaru finally spoke up, his voice heavy with exasperation. "Really. And you people think I can be melodramatic..."

Inuyasha whirled in a fiery rage to confront his brother, but the first thing he saw instead was the source of the small tapping noise.

Sesshoumaru was lightly clicking Tenseiga's sheath off the stone wall behind him. Inuyasha's jaw dropped as it suddenly dawned on him. "Fuck...of course."

"We kill the bird, we kill the beast, revive the bird and go home. No need for all these foolish displays."

Sairex looked a little lost and Inuyasha's ears flattened back. "Well, fucking exCUSE me...don't act like I'm an idiot just because I'm not used to death being, y'know, a little bit permanent. I'm still not used to running around with a guy that can just slash his sword and make it go away."

The slightest of smirks crossed Sesshoumaru's lips. Sairex had perked up and was looking at Sesshoumaru, trying hard not to get his hopes up. But he had to ask. "Zo...if I die to allow you to kill Zetsukosei...den vhen he is dead, you can bring me back? I vould be alive again?"

Sesshoumaru nodded once in response.

Sairex thought for a moment before taking a knee before Sesshoumaru and bowing his head. "Lord Zezzhoumaru, I zvear to you my loyalty and my zervice. I vill zerve you in any capacity you desire. I have many talents dat vill be of great use to you. I humbly request dat you accept my fealty in exchange for my life and my freedom."

Sesshoumaru frowned uncertainly. It wasn't because he didn't understand the magnitude or gravity of Sairex's offer. "I... but I am not the one you..."

Inuyasha sighed heavily. "Sessh. You and I both know that even if its a tiny piece at a time, you'll take back ruling the damn place. You're already going to take Miroku off the bookwork. I could tell just by the way you looked at it. It doesn't MATTER, what happened...and if anyone thinks you weaker for it, they can try themselves against you and learn how foolish they are. Even if something LOOKS fragile it doesn't mean it is."

Sesshoumaru scowled darkly but gave Sairex an imperial glance. "I accept your fealty if it is to the Lord of the West and not specifically to myself. I will accept you in my brother's name, but should I so desire to reclaim my throne in the future, then you will be mine. Is this understood?"

Sairex smiled. "Den I zvear my fealty to da zons of da great and vise Inu no Taizho."

Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha both nodded, before the taiyoukai looked at his brother. "Alright. You may kill him now." When Inuyasha did not respond, he sighed and drew Toukijin. "Raven...Sairex. Should we fail to slay this beast, you know your death will remain irreversible?"

Sairex nodded, his eyes slipping closed as a genuine smile settled on his face. "You vill not fail. You are ztrong, like your father before you."

Sesshoumaru frowned bitterly. "My Lord Father could have crushed me underfoot without effort."

Sairex chuckled as he stood up, patting Sesshoumaru lightly on the shoulder. "Your Lord Father vas many times your age, Lord Zezzhoumaru. Vhen he vas young, he vas no mightier den you are now. Your power, y our ztrength...it vill grow all your life. Zlowly, but it vill. It vill grow with experience, vith time, vith combat and ztrife and learning to master all of yourself, and not merely hide and control your emotions."

Sesshoumaru squinted. "Exactly how well did you know my Lord Father?..."

Sairex chuckled. "Mm... Fairly vell. Not for as long as I vould have liked, but I knew him vell enough. Your father vas...vell. Hard to put to vords. He vas a violent comet crashing to the zurface of da vorld. He fought passionately, he lived passionately, and he died passionately. He vas calm and in complete control of everyting at all times...and he vas at peace vith himself. Dat is your mistake, Lord Zezzhoumaru. You zeek to dominate your emotions, to crush dem and bury dem. To hide dem and not acknowledge dem, pretend like dey do not exist. Instead...you zhould accept dem, learn from dem...embrace dem. Dere is nothing wrong with keeping dem in check...but do not lie to yourself dat you are better dan to have dem."

The taiyoukai frowned and made no outward response. Initially he had wanted to rebuke the raven and proclaim that he did no such thing...but he realized it was a lie even as the words floated behind his lips.

"I know how hard it has been for you, Zezzhoumaru. You vere far, far too young to take up da role you did, and you've done better dan anyone could ever have thought. Your father vould be zo very proud of you. But it made you have to grow up before you zhould have had to. Instead of doing all da tings other youkai your age did, you had the largest of da demon kingdoms thrust into your lap. You zhould have had time to make a name for yourself...time to find a mate, time to form alliances and friendships and learn of your kingdom to treat your people as people and not merely numbers to balance. You zhould have had time to live da life of Zezzhoumaru, not dove in and immediately lived da life of da Vestern Lord. Da two do not coexist...you've zacrificed yourself and denied yourself and been instead vhat you had to be for da zake of da kingdom."

"What else could I do?" Sesshoumaru finally asked. "I could not let all my Lord Father built be destroyed when I was capable of taking care of it!"

"Oh, Lord Zezzhoumaru..." Sairex sighed sadly. "You've done zo vell for da kingdom...but you run it by yourzelf. Even when you are in da company of others, you are alone. You do not let anyone help you."

"How can I trust anyone to help me..." Sesshoumaru muttered before he could stop himself. He suddenly snapped to a more serious expression. "May we get on with this now?"

Sairex paused for a moment before leaning forward, his voice too soft for Inuyasha to hear. His words sent a shiver down Sesshoumaru's spine. "Do not run avay from da people dat love you because you are Zezzhoumaru and not just da Vestern Lord...your brother and da girl. Love is not a liability, it vill make you ztrong. Only vhen you love, only when you feel zo very ztrongly about zometing, does it give you a reason to fight. Love can hurt, it is a risk...but dat is vhy it must be fought for. You can fight to exist, but only vhen you fight to live and fight for vhat you love do you find your meaning...it all becomes vorthvhile."

"You talk a lot, bird," Sesshoumaru whispered after a long moment.

"I vanted you to have my advice in case zometing goes vrong," Sairex responded with a slight grin. "And you do. I am ready."

Inuyasha gave his friend one last long look before turning away, unable to watch. Sesshoumaru raised Toukijin and nodded to the raven. "Thank you."

Sairex closed his eyes. "You are velcome. Now go kill Zetsukosei."

Sesshoumaru whirled his blade quickly about and drove it forward. It slid easily between the raven's ribs and into his heart, dropping him silently where he stood.

The entire fortress shook from the wounded roar of an impossibly massive, agonized beast.

Tsetsukosei had heard, he had felt...and he was coming.


	28. Chapter 27

Pride (In the Name of Love) 27 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So here I am, trying to visualize this chapter...and no matter what angle I looked at it from, it was playing to the Mortal Kombat theme song in my head. So I figured...why not... and listened to said theme song while writing. Just thought I'd share, it amused me.

In answer to a reviewer's question - When is Rin coming back? Eventually. I have things planned on that front. Where is Shippo? Er...floating around the Western Castle somewhere, learning demon stuff. I love the lil kitsune, dun get me wrong, but there wasn't much place in this story for him as a major player so he sorta got shunted off to the side.

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Sesshoumaru stretched his muscles in silence, limbering up a bit. Outwardly he was calm - inwardly he was in a state of violent turmoil. He closed his eyes and attempted to clear his mind, find his center. Sesshoumaru didn't really know how Tsetsukosei was in a real fight, but he was not about to take any foolish chances.

Inuyasha glanced at Sesshoumaru, figuring his brother was mentally preparing himself. His gaze slowly traveled to Sairex, who still lay at Sesshoumaru's feet. // Fuck... I don't care how necessary it was...I don't think I ever could have done it. Poor bird. //

"Inuyasha."

Inuyasha blinked and glanced over at his brother again. He was surprised to see how close Sesshoumaru was. "Er..y...yeah?"

Sesshoumaru eyed him for a long moment and then abruptly yanked Inuyasha against him in a tight but somewhat awkward hug. He pressed his lips to the surprised hanyou's forehead and then released him. "If things go wrong, you must not die here."

"I won't leave you, Sessh."

"Inuyasha...his fight will be more with me than you. I am stronger than you, you cannot deny it." Inuyasha huffed but didn't protest the statement - it WAS true. "If I should fall, you must safeguard Rin and our Lord Father's lands. At that point in the battle, there would be no reason for your life to be needlessly lost."

"That's assuming we fail at all. It's just another youkai. We'll be home in time for dinner."

Sesshoumaru's lips twitched into a smirk. "Indeed. And now we wait."

They didn't have to wait long - rather than bursting through the door, the walls of the castle turned thick and shadowy. Both Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru had the impression of moving. When the castle had fully melted away, they stood in the midst of a barren rocky field littered with jagged spikes of obsidian. The sky was a roiling shade of the deepest purple and massive forks of lightning cracked behind thick, rolling black clouds.

Tsetsukosei appeared before them slowly, wearing his true form. He was a massive and twisted dragon-like beast. Dark and yellowing bone showed through his rotting flesh. Tattered scraps of hide still clung to some areas of the beast's fetid body. Tsetsukosei opened his horrible, twisted mouth and let out a rumbling roar that shook the ground beneath them, his rows of teeth yellow and jaggedly broken but still deadly. As he roared, he unfurled a skeletal pair of wings that were draped with rotting leathery skin, filled with holes.

Despite being dead, Tsetsukosei was still broad and obviously strong, his mostly visible but thickly-corded muscles rippling with every movement. Long and wicked talons gouged into the stone beneath him as easily as if it were hot butter. Jagged bone spikes jutted up from his spine and down along the length of his skeletal tail. His pupilless, smoky crimson eyes burned with malice and hatred from deep in his skull.

Tsetsukosei's gaze slowly dropped to Sairex's still form and he spoke. Inuyasha felt vaguely queasy as he watched the tiny white worms writhing in the dragon's flesh even inside his dark maw. "So you were willing to kill the raven for your chance at me? Foolish puppies, both of you..." The wicked eyes turned to Sesshoumaru. "Ah, my pretty little pet...you were much more fun than the bird. I enjoyed your screams..."

Sesshoumaru's spine stiffened and he tightened his grip on Toukijin. "Enough talk. This ends now." He glanced at his brother and nodded slightly, wordlessly communicating. Inuyasha returned his nod, hefting Tetsusaiga. As one they turned their attention back to the dracolich and charged, Inuyasha's voice raising in a fierce battle-cry and Sesshoumaru's as silent as death.

Their movements were a blur, almost too fast for a human eye to follow. Sesshoumaru's strikes were fast and precise, and he moved with the fluidity and grace of a dancer. He was beautiful and deadly in that moment, living for the battle. His sunfire golden eyes flared with vibrant intensity and his lips were pulled back in a snarl, almost a feral grin. Blood thrummed in his veins and adrenaline screamed through him.

Sesshoumaru had never felt so alive as he did in this moment, locked in this violent and vicious dance of death. He ran along the razor's edge with no fear, no shame, and no regret. The slightest mistake would cost him everything.

Sesshoumaru made no mistakes.

Inuyasha was also a thing of beauty, but of a different sort. His attacks were not so fluid or rapid as his elder brother's, but they were stronger, the Tetsusaiga devastating. His smile and his eyes mirrored those of Sesshoumaru - they were opposite sides of the same coin, moving in perfect concert with each other.

Tsetsukosei was truly impressed and he whirled, tail smashing through stone and jaws snapping powerfully at Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai was simply faster than he was. No matter.

Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha retreated not a moment too soon when a dark pulse of black energy erupted around Tsetsukosei. The two of them skidded to a halt, digging in to slow their momentum and sliding across the glassy scree. A slight scowl drifted to Sesshoumaru's features even as he leapt back into the fray like a coiled spring. He was scoring innumerable hits - Inuyasha was scoring his fair share as well - and they seemed to be having little effect. Bits of rotting flesh were shorn from bone, and thick black blood oozed from several places.

Inuyasha glanced at his brother, and without needing to be told, Sesshoumaru bounced out of the way. He heard his brother's battle-cry as he unleashed his Wind Scar.

Tsetsukosei was hit full on, not having expected the attack, His form shuddered briefly before he growled and dug his claws in - that had HURT. A hole had been torn in his ribcage, exposing glimpses of slimy black organs oozing in his chest.

He moved faster than anything so large should have been able, his tail lashing out with a whiplike SNAP. One of the long bone spikes drove clear through Inuyasha's stomach and his body was hoisted off the ground, hurled with shattering force into a massive rock. The hanyou didn't even have it in him to cry out, he simply grunted as he slid to the ground.

"You bastard..." Sesshoumaru hissed, leaping out of the way and barely avoiding the same fate Inuyasha had just suffered. // My brother...you shall pay. No one ... no one but me touches him. His life or death is mine to choose, and NOT yours! //

The taiyoukai's dance of death raged around Tsetsukosei, but Sesshoumaru was beginning to be discouraged. He had landed a hundred hits that would have slain most demons already to practically no effect. Tsetsukosei simply was not alive, not subject to pain or flesh wounds. However much of the putrid rot he managed to slice off, it seemed the beast simply had more.

// If I do not come up with something quickly, I will die this day... // Sesshoumaru thought with frigid calm. And he was surprised when he realized he did not wish to die any longer. He had Rin...and he had Inuyasha. Both of them were worth fighting for - worth living for. Worth loving. //

It came to him suddenly, and Sesshoumaru had to fight the urge to look around to see if he was indeed still alone with Tsetsukosei. In that moment, he felt his father's presence. He felt his father guiding him. // My son...I am so proud of you...// Almost in a trance, Sesshoumaru dropped Toukijin and drew Tenseiga. A brilliant glimmer of light ran down the length of the blade before the taiyoukai lifted it and charged.

Inuyasha opened his eyes slowly and was struck dumb by the sight unfolding before him. Sesshoumaru flew at the dark beast enshrouded in a glowing white light shot through with flecks of gold. He met the beast like some sort of avenging angel, his hair streaming like wings behind him as he moved. He was beautiful. He was, in that moment, perfect. Inuyasha found himself unable to breathe.

Tenseiga slashed through the air in devastating strikes, and Tsetsukosei howled. The blade did not cut living flesh...but it surely was wickedly effective against that of the animated dead. The dragon's confidence began to waver and his attacks became more desperate, but he was powerless to catch the darting taiyoukai, and not fast enough to get fully away from each slice of that terrible sword.

Suddenly Sesshoumaru was directly in front of him, his eyes flaming with triumph. Tsetsukosei had no time to react short of a piercing shriek as the taiyoukai whirled. Tenseiga sang as it cleaved the air, as it sliced cleanly through the dracolich's bony throat. Sesshoumaru landed in a crouch, sword held before him and his eyes closed, his back to the beast.

Bloody crimson eyes flickered in shock at the taiyoukai before slowly fading and winking out. The massive skull fell to the rocky ground with a wet thump of cracking bone and splattering, rotted flesh. The rest of the force animating the beast left it. A shudder ran through the decayed body as everything binding it dissipated and it crumbled into a heap.

Sesshoumaru stood and looked at his sword...his father's fang...for a long time. The light faded to a few golden flickers before dying out entirely, leaving the sword as pristine as if it had never been used before. Sesshoumaru's eyes closed and he bowed his head humbly. // Thank you, my Lord Father... //

The taiyoukai made his way over to where Inuyasha was struggling to stand and helped him to his feet. "Sessh...that was...amazing. I've seen you fight before, but never..."

"Hush," Sesshoumaru responded softly. "How badly are you injured?"

"Eh....I'll heal. You should go wake up Sairex though..."

Sesshoumaru nodded a bit - he had forgotten about the raven youkai. He drew on Tenseiga's more familiar powers as he resurrected Sairex, then sheathed the blade.

Sairex blinked slowly, his gaze slowly going to the rotted mound of flesh and bone that had once been the most diabolical fiend he had ever known. "You killed him..."

Sesshoumaru nodded once. "Yes."

"You are more powerful dan even I thought..." Sairex said softly. "And da bond...I...I am free."

"Not quite. You swore yourself into service to my family."

A grin split the raven youkai's face as he sketched a quick, jaunty bow. "Of course, Lord Zezzhoumaru. I owe you my life."

Inuyasha smiled tiredly and patted the raven on the shoulder. "Let's get home...I'm sure Miroku is worried sick, especially since you didn't tell him about the whole you-being-alive-again plan."

Sairex chuckled. "Yes...I believe I vill zurprise him..." With a thoughtful look, the raven youkai vanished. A moment later, a portal appeared in his wake for Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru to use - and they did.

It was good to be home.


	29. Chapter 28

Pride (In the Name of Love) 28 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So the fight against Tsetsukosei is thus ended - but the story is far from. Ah, I can never leave well enough alone. Hehehe....

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Sesshoumaru was relieved. He hadn't realized how much of a weight off of his mind it would be to finally rid himself of the dark shadow that haunted his thoughts, although he knew his nightmares were likely to remain for a while.

But moreover...his contact with his father, whether real or imagined, had settled an old hurt deep inside him. He had logically accepted that his father had probably not taken his angry words to heart, but in his own heart he had still held doubt. Now, that had been erased.

He made a mental note that someday he maybe should thank Sairex for his advice. It had made a difference - he had never really thought about his emotional attachments as strengths in any way. And the raven had been right about his father, too. He wondered briefly how they had known each other. // A violent comet crashing to the world, indeed...a fitting description for my Lord Father if ever there was one. And it is odd, that sometimes it takes having things pointed out to you to see them. I always knew how...openly emotional my Lord Father was...and never did I think him weak. Nor did anyone else. //

Inuyasha followed his brother as Sesshoumaru swept down the hallway, not wanting to interrupt his concentration. The hanyou could almost hear the wheels turning in his brother's head. His injuries had closed up enough for him to move freely on his own - they had hurt and been enough to take him down at the time, but the breaks had been clean and the punctures relatively narrow in diameter.

Sesshoumaru apparently had concocted some sort of plan. He stopped by the kitchen and got a mid-sized, sharp knife and a towel, then made his way out and down the hall. Inuyasha was painfully curious by the time Sesshoumaru sat down at a table in his own chambers. Inuyasha hadn't exactly been invited in, but the taiyoukai hadn't demanded he leave either. The hanyou took it as tacit approval for his presence.

Sesshoumaru folded the thick towel over a couple times and set it on the table before taking up his knife. Inuyasha's eyes were wide with dawning alarm, and the taiyoukai paused. "What?"

"Sessh...what are you doing?"

"...I would assume you probably do not wish to watch this. You may go."

This, as one could imagine, did little to ease Inuyasha's nerves. "What are you thinki-- SHIT! Sessh!" Inuyasha gaped in horror as Sesshoumaru drove the knife into his finger.

Sesshoumaru proceeded to ignore his brother and grit his teeth as he shoved the blade further down into the top of his finger and into the bone. A horrifying amount of blood mingled with the hissing purple froth of venom from his severed glands. He ignored his brother's frantic protests and reached into one of his pockets, withdrawing the string of his claws that he had snatched from Tsetsukosei's throat. // Hm. Wonder if this will actually work... They are not regrowing on their own, but if my body merely thinks it to be like a broken bone...perhaps...//

Inuyasha watched in disbelief as Sesshoumaru snapped the cord and examined his claws until he found the correct one. He plucked it from the small pile and then worked it into the deep gouge that he had carved into his finger, holding it in place. The hanyou moaned and looked away. "God, that's....you don't really think it's going to WORK, do you, Sessh...?"

Sesshoumaru eyed his healing finger. The claw remained in place when he let it go. "We shall see. If not, I'll simply rip it back out again and find another way." The taiyoukai's voice was tight but controlled - after all, fingertips really are a hotbed of nerve endings and it hurt a lot more than he wanted to let on.

After an indeterminable amount of time, the pain faded. Sesshoumaru hesitantly poked at the table with his claw and almost beamed in delight to find it working properly. He mentally danced about when his further efforts allowed a tiny little drop of his venom to eat at the expensive stone tabletop. // And the peasants rejoice... // "It works."

"Still fucking gory to watch."

"Then do not watch." Sesshoumaru poked at the table with his restored claw again a couple more times, inordinately pleased. He refused to acknowledge how emasculated he had felt being stripped of such a personal weapon, or to fully mute his almost childish glee at being able to dramatically tap his talon on the table - which he did several times.

Despite the prospect of the rather extreme pain it was going to cause, he plucked up his knife again. The reward was well worth it.

Inuyasha plopped down on his brother's bed and refused to watch, although he was unwilling to leave yet. "That was one hell of a fight. You were awesome."

"Hnnn..." Sesshoumaru replied.

"Heh. I was getting worried for a while. Damn thing didn't seem to be feeling anything we hit him with. Then you got all...glowy...and started waving around Tenseiga..."

"My Lord Father told me to."

"Eh?" Inuyasha sat up and blinked, his ears pricking forward.

Sesshoumaru paused in his self-mutilation to look at his brother. He suddenly felt awkward. "I...felt him. He told me what to do and...he and I are at peace."

"Eh, told ya the old man didn't take it to heart."

"Hn."

"So now that that bastard is dead, we can go get Rin again, right?"

Sesshoumaru flinched, letting out a sharp hiss as he cut himself far more deeply than he had intended. He growled softly to show his displeasure at the suggestion.

"Sessh, you can't just leave the kid hanging there forever. You know how hurt she'd be? She's probably been counting the seconds until you show up. And you KNOW that even if you don't go back sometime, I will be. Fairly soon, actually."

"Tell her...I was killed."

The hanyou snorted in disbelief. "What?!"

"Then she will have no reason to constantly worry about coming back here. She will grieve, and she will get over it and move on with her life."

"What are you so afraid of? The bad guy is dead, and you have people to help you protect her now, even."

// But you cannot protect her from ME, and that is what I truly fear... // "No."

"I won't tell her you're dead."

"Then tell her nothing."

"And if she asks?"

Sesshoumaru growled again. "Then tell her it is too dangerous for her to remain here any longer!"

Inuyasha could sense his brother's volatile emotions threatening to boil over and decided it might be a good idea to back off. "Alright, alright...chill...So. Er. Am I still going to rule this place?"

"Hn..." Sesshoumaru growled. "This Sesshoumaru is not fit to rule, but I will not allow a human to control our politics and diplomacy. The monk has to worry about being trained anyways. I will take care of the paperwork."

Inuyasha smirked inwardly. // It's a start... he'll take over everything eventually, even if only out of frustration at it not being done to his...perfect standards. And I think I know a few ways to start working him out of this depression he's in... if it doesn't get me killed first. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A light knock sounded on Miroku's door. The monk glanced at the door for a long moment, not having the heart to get up and answer it. When the knock sounded again, more insistently, he forced down the lump in his throat and sat up. He composed himself as best as he could, although he was not ashamed to mourn the loss of his friend. He had not been informed of the plan with Tenseiga, or of it's success. "Th...the door is open."

The door almost immediately swung open, and Miroku glanced at his visitor. At first, he did not comprehend the full magnitude of this visit. Something about the creature leaning so casually in his door frame struck him as eerily familiar even though he was sure he'd never seen him before.

Reality dawned. Miroku drank in his first sight of Sairex in the flesh.

The raven had taken some time to clean himself up and get some new clothes. He was a short, fine-boned and graceful creature. His black hair fell almost to his waist. Part of it was done up into dozens of small braids, each studded with delicate beads carved from bone, while the rest swung free. His skin was very pale and stood out in sharp contrast to his hair and the arching, glossy black wings. His exotic yellow eyes twinkled in amusement and his lips were quirked up in an amused grin. He was dressed in loose black silks.

Miroku figured the raven was just about the most beautiful creature he'd ever seen. He was on his feet in an instant, darting over to the raven. "Sairex!"

Sairex nodded and grinned, returning the enthusiastic hug he was given. "Indeed. I vas half afraid you'd not recognize me outside of your body."

Miroku grinned and tightened his grip briefly before releasing the raven. "I thought you wanted me to seduce you first?"

"Lord Inuyazha vas right, you ARE a pervert."

Miroku pulled a hurt look and clutched his wrist mournfully as he lifted his hand, dropping his head. "I can't help it. The hand...it...it has a mind of its own..."

Sairex snorted. "Be dat as it may, it vasn't YOUR hand you vere using on me."

Miroku blinked slowly before bursting out laughing. "Hmm...I don't have a good comeback for that one. Been accused of a lot of things, but that's a first." His expression grew more serious. "Sairex... how are..."

"I zee dey didn't bother to inform you of da plan. I didn't mean to cause you vorry, my friend. At da time, I didn't realize dat Lord Zezzhoumaru can apparently resurrect da dead..."

Miroku slapped himself in the forehead. "Tenseiga...of course." He blinked. "Wait, you really WERE dead?"

"For a vhile. It really is not as interesting as you might tink."

"How'd you...who..." Miroku didn't really know if he wanted to know.

"Lord Zezzhoumaru. It vas painless, I assure you. Felt more like a pressure dan a pain. Rather odd. But yes. Dey killed me, killed Zetsukosei, revived me, and now dey are home and I have a new job. Two of dem, actually."

"Two, eh?"

"Vell, yes. I need to train you and be an appropriate advisor."

"Training me, hmm. That will prove interesting."

Sairex flicked his eyes over Miroku before examining his talons with a look of feigned disdain. "Vell, you are only a human monk...it vill be difficult. Can't teach humans much of anyting."

Miroku snorted. "Oh, hush, you. And I have my own work to do, if I am to properly seduce you."

Sairex smirked. "You have your vork cut out for you, den. I am not zo easily zed--mmph!" Sairex's yellow eyes flew wide as he found himself suddenly crushed against Miroku's chest and the subject of a mind-numbingly passionate kiss. His eyelids flickered shut of their own accord as his resistance melted. Miroku's fingers threaded through his hair and held him close, his other arm wrapped firmly around the raven's waist.

Miroku hadn't really intended to be quite so abrupt and vicious about grabbing him. He was a little surprised at how easily he was able to pull Sairex to him - the raven weighed far less than he looked like he should. // Mm...does he have hollow bones, like a bird? // However, it didn't matter. He was just so grateful to see him, alive and well...indeed, see him at all...and he couldn't resist a taste.

Sairex was a bit dazed when he was finally released and Miroku smiled deviously. "Oh, yes...you are going to make this SO difficult."

"Hmph." The raven folded his arms across his chest and turned about, seemingly in a huff. "You just caught me by zurprise is all. I'm not -- nnnnn..." Sairex shivered as Miroku's fingertips trailed over the arch of one of his wings.

Miroku chuckled softly. "Yes...you'll be trouble, indeed."

"I tink for your first lesson, ve vill begin physical conditioning. Go run a hundred laps around da courtyard."

Miroku blinked. "Hey, now...that's not fair. Besides, I'm in good sh--"

Sairex squinted. "You accepted me as your teacher, zo you must do as I zay or face da conzequences. A hundred fifty. Go."

Miroku smirked. // So that's how the game will be played? Very well...// He bowed politely and then made his way towards the courtyard, Sairex trailing behind him. // This should be interesting. //


	30. Chapter 29

Pride (In the Name of Love) 29 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - *sigh* Mmm, you guys'll either love me or hate me for this one...probably both. XD I apologize in advance for the terrible cliffhanger I shall leave you on - I ran short of time when writing. Hehe...consider it a teaser.

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Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru slowly entered the courtyard. They walked over to greet Sairex, who was leaning casually against the wall, his eyes following Miroku as the monk jogged around the rather extensive outer circle.

"What part of spiritual training involves wearing grooves in my courtyard?" Sesshoumaru finally asked.

"Oh, no part, really," Sairex responded with a grin, flipping a couple of his braids back over his shoulder.

"Whatever he did, I'm sure he deserved it," Inuyasha snickered.

Sairex raised an eyebrow as he glanced at Sesshoumaru. "Is dere a reason you zmell of blood, m'lord?" Sesshoumaru smirked and held up his re-clawed fingers, wiggling them slightly.

"Impromptu surgery. I am on my way to the baths as we speak."

"It was fucking gory, man...he was all cutting open his fingers and cramming claws in." Inuyasha looked vaguely green.

Sairex paused to wave as Miroku passed them before calling out cheerily. "Only zeventy-two more to go! You might make it in time for dinner!" The raven turned his attention to Inuyasha, arching one eyebrow. "Zo...the zight of your brother slicing countless demons to ribbons does not phase you, but cutting open his fingers does?"

Inuyasha stuck his tongue out. "Eh, it's different..."

Sesshoumaru stared at Sairex until the raven paid him full attention. "Sairex. The monk is in your care and is no longer to attempt to run any facet of my castle's affairs. This Sesshoumaru thanks him for his effort, but I shall be assuming control of diplomatic functions again personally. He is to concentrate fully on his training. It would be...useful...to have a worthwhile monk at my disposal." Sairex bowed slightly in understanding, and Sesshoumaru turned on his heel, striding out to go find his bath.

Sairex chuckled and nodded to Inuyasha. "He ztill zpeaks like da Lord of da Vest, doesn't he..."

"Eh. He still is, he just is being a stubborn ass about the whole thing. The only thing stopping him from playing king again is himself and his paranoia."

"Mm...his reaction is...underztandable, given da circumztances, Lord Inuyazha."

"Keh, I know. I just think it'd do him some good to get back into what he's familiar with."

"Baby zteps and all dat."

"Yeah. So...why ARE you making Miroku run laps? Not that it isn't amusing to watch..."

Sairex snickered. "Mm. Da monk and I...ve got fairly close in da time ve spent together. I know today vas da first time ve met face to face, but.." Sairex shrugged slightly. "Vhat ve zhared, it vas closer dan most people ever have da chance to be. You can't hide much of yourzelf vhen you are so intimately ztuck together."

"So what, he try to grope you or somethin'? Miroku usually goes for chicks, but I suppose you're not too hard on the eyes."

Sairex blinked a few times, attempting to properly digest the latter half of Inuyasha's statement. "Er...tank you? I tink...And...er..." The raven inwardly cursed how easily it was to detect a blush with skin as fair as his own. "You...could say he...did zometing...inappropriate."

Inuyasha blinked, ears flicking forward in interest. "So he didn't just grab your ass? That's usually his favorite move."

"Er...it's actually zomevhat complicated." The raven cleared his throat, praying he wouldn't have to explain himself. Inuyasha gave him a squint.

"HOW inappropriate?"

"Extremely. Before ve met in perzon."

Inuyasha scratched at his head. "How'd he grab you before you were able to touch each other?"

"Ztory I'd rather not zhare. Ultimately, dis is my vay of getting back at him for...mm... making me lose our bet before its even begun."

The hanyou snorted. "What'd ya bet?"

"That he couldn't zeduce me." Sairex chuckled softly.

"So you guys are together, eh?" Inuyasha couldn't help but grin at this unexpected development.

"Technically? No." A faint frown flickered across the raven's features. "I had...hoped to avoid zuch involvement. It vill be...painful. You are hanyou, you underztand." Sairex noted the injured look Inuyasha gave him at the reminder.

"Everyone judges me because of that."

Sairex was quiet for a moment before speaking. "Humans...exist in our lives for zuch a zhort vhile. And even if I so readily accept zuch a guaranteed, painful loss...vhat of him? How vould it be to age, to be eaten avay by old age and know dat da one you love looks da zame as dey did fifty years ago...vill look da same as they do long after you die..." Sairex sighed. "Dere are reasons dat youkai and humans do not often mate. I do not hold you in contempt for da circumztances of your birth, Lord Inuyazha. Indeed, I respect you for dem. Your parents vere very brave to face zuch inevitable pain. Love is...a powerful ting..."

Inuyasha nodded after a moment. He'd never quite heard an opinion like THAT one on his being a hanyou. Sairex looked somewhat saddened but ...resigned. "Yeah, well...an occasionally wise but usually lecherous monk once told me somethin'. 'You can't choose the ones you love. Love happens.'"

Sairex nodded slowly, a smile flicking across his lips. "Oh, do not vorry...I've no intentions of driving him avay. I'm already in too deep. I just...do not vant to ruin his life."

"Eh, I don't think you have much to worry about. Despite his flaws, Miroku's actually ... eh. Smarter than most humans. He ...y'know, sees the big picture instead of just what's in front of him."

The raven nodded with a slight smirk. "True. However...I'll make him vork to vin his bet, if only for amusement's zake." Sairex chuckled as the weary monk passed them again, a smile plastered on his face.

"Well, let me know when its ok to congratulate you two. I have to go find my brother."

Sairex nodded and settled back against the wall. "Of course. Oh, Lord Inuyazha...?"

"Yeah?" Inuyasha paused in the doorway. Sairex smiled.

"Tank you. I do appreciate all you have done for me and all you ztill do for me."

"No problem. It's gonna be great having you around. Don't work the monk too hard." Inuyasha grinned and waved before heading into the halls to track down his brother.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Finding Sesshoumaru wasn't overly difficult. Inuyasha slid soundlessly into the bathroom and just paused there in the doorway, ears twitching forward as he looked at his brother.

Sesshoumaru was reclined against the wall of the large in-ground tub. His hair slithered across the marble floor behind him, his head resting on the cool surface. His arms were stretched out to either side and he was idly drumming his claws along the edge of the tub, the sound pleasing to him judging from the slight smirk twitching his lips.

Inuyasha's eyes slowly drank in the sight of him. His eyes trailed down the exposed line of his brother's throat to his bare chest, down to the line where his body disappeared into the water. Save for the permanent red scar of Tsetsukosei's bite, Sesshoumaru was flawless. Inuyasha found himself fascinated as he looked at his brother's markings, idly wondering how many markings HE had when his demon took over. He was startled out of his thoughts when he heard his brother speak.

"You may join me or leave, but you should not stand and stare."

"I wasn't starin'!" Inuyasha demanded, but he quickly squirmed out of his clothes and slid into the water up to his nose, ears flattening as he tried to hide his blush with the water. Sesshoumaru sat up straighter, arching an eyebrow. "Well shit, it's not like I wandered in on you doing something bad!"

"Such as?" It took a concentrated effort to keep his other eyebrow from hiking up to join the first.

Inuyasha's blush deepened and he scowled, folding his arms across his chest. "You know."

"What would I possibly be doing in the bath that would embarrass you so, dear brother? I am most curious."

Inuyasha stared at Sesshoumaru. "You're just trying to embarrass me, you ain't that dense."

Sesshoumaru frowned slightly. "You are not making sense. What is it you are insinuating?"

The hanyou blinked very slowly as it dawned on him that Sesshoumaru actually WASN'T teasing him. "Oh, come on, you can't tell me you never...errr...pleasure yourself." Inuyasha contemplated drowning and wondered if it would be less painful than the fire in his cheeks.

The taiyoukai snorted in sudden understanding and leaned back, closing his eyes. "Oh. No. This Sesshoumaru does not bother with such things."

Inuyasha gaped, his amazement forgotten for a moment. "Oh, come on. Everyone does."

One golden eye reopened to glance at him. "This Sesshoumaru does not."

Inuyasha suddenly nodded in understanding. "Oh. I get it. It's beneath you. You probably have some massive harem somewhere that takes care of your needs." He snorted.

Sesshoumaru stared hard at his brother. "No. This Sesshoumaru has no...needs."

Inuyasha squinted. "Come off it. You aren't so unfeeling as you pretend to be. You're hundreds of years old, in a position of power, and too damn good looking for anyone else's good. You can't possibly expect me to sit here and believe you're untouched by everyone, including yourself. Stop fucking with me."

Sesshoumaru frowned deeply. "I...was." Whether or not the taiyoukai realized it, his fingers had moved to unconsciously trail over the hated scar at his throat.

"See, I kn--...oh." Realization dawned. " Oh, fuck me. You...you're serious, aren't you?"

It was Sesshoumaru's turn to sink down into the water a bit, muttering darkly. "This Sesshoumaru found physical desire to be a distracting, senseless thing and thus did not indulge. Eventually I...got used to it and figured I'd take a mate and deal with it...then."

"But...Sessh, that's like...not healthy."

"Hn... I am perfectly healthy, thank you."

"But...you're denying yourself something that feels great for no reason other than to keep your focus? Maybe this job WAS getting to you."

"Physical pleasures are unnecessary," Sesshoumaru muttered.

"How do you know, since you never tried? You can't form a fair opinion with no experience." Inuyasha had gotten over the embarrassment of the subject material now that it was turning into something of a battle, be it only one of words.

That set Sesshoumaru back a few mental paces and he frowned. Inuyasha had just hit a sore spot - the taiyoukai had always been very careful to make sure all his opinions and decisions were based firmly in fact, generally after thorough research. It would not do to make a stance on something he had no clue about. He couldn't very well sit here and say sex - all aspects of it - was completely pointless and not worthwhile when he had not experienced it. Sesshoumaru was smart enough to realize that no matter how dreadful it made him feel, what had happened with Tsetsukosei really didn't count.

Inuyasha could almost hear the wheels turning in his brother's mind. His head cocked to one side in amusement as he watched the tiny emotions flickering across his expression - obviously, Sesshoumaru was waging a sudden mental debate with himself.

Sesshoumaru finally spoke up, very slowly and carefully. "This Sesshoumaru does not have a mate so I ... I retract my judgment on the situation pending further experience."

Inuyasha almost burst out laughing, unused to seeing Sesshoumaru so hesitant and...was that a blush?...No...It COULDN'T be...Could it...? "Sessh, you're blushing!"

"This Sesshoumaru does NOT blush!" the taiyoukai hissed forcefully, sinking down in the water some.

"Aww, poor Sesshy...did I embarrass you?" Inuyasha slid over and patted his brother's back in a mock attempt to soothe him. Sesshoumaru bared his fangs and growled softly, but the hanyou obviously wasn't terribly afraid that he may be attacked. "Seriously, though, Sessh...there's nothing wrong with taking some time to enjoy yourself. By yourself or not. Its better with the not."

Sesshoumaru slowly turned his gaze to his brother's and paused. His counter-argument crashed around inside his mind and refused to settle down and come out properly, so he said nothing.

Inuyasha saw the somewhat vulnerable look flicker in his brother's eyes, and was suddenly acutely aware of the conversation they had just had and exactly how close to the taiyoukai he was. The thought that his older brother...lord of the land and harbinger of so much destruction...was innocent in a way that he wasn't... The mere idea sent an abrupt coil of lust into his stomach. Before he realized what he was doing, he had slid forward, curling his arms around Sesshoumaru's neck and pulling the somewhat startled taiyoukai into a heated kiss.


	31. Chapter 30

Pride (In the Name of Love) 30 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I apologize so much for the delay on this chapter, of all chapters. I had not slept in three days and was (still am) terribly ill. The lack of sleep thing was not for lack of trying. I work nights, sleep during the day...but they've been putting a roof on the house so i literally could not sleep. And when it came time to write the update and I got home from work...I was just ... too drained. I'm still out of it. My brain's mushy. However, I'll give it a go to prevent y'all from lynching me.

If anyone thinks this is too dreadful, I can rewrite the chapter. It's been VERY hard to get my groove on with writing the past couple days due to my physical state. I apologize. I do not wish to deliver substandard material to my readers. Nor do I like making you wait. So I guess I'll see how this chapter goes over...and I'm sorry if its not what people expected...

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// Oh dear gods, help me...// Sesshoumaru pleaded desperately. // Oh, damn you, Inuyasha....damn you for making me feel...THIS...damn you for making me realize what I've been missing, I'll never control it now...oh, fuck, I am going mad...mad...// Sesshoumaru's head fell back and his claws dug ineffectually into the ledge of the marble tub. His breath hissed between his teeth and his back arched. Every muscle in his body was tight and drawn.

It had started with a simple kiss. Having initiated the last one, Sesshoumaru had known what to expect. In fact, as far as he saw it, he knew what to expect throughout - after all, he was too well-read for anything Inuyasha did to surprise him. But when the hanyou whispered for him to just lean back and relax, Sesshoumaru nodded to himself mentally. He would let his brother have his fun and show him what he would, then. Get it out of his system.

So he thought.

The first spike of his desire had come when Inuyasha had nibbled his ear - he hadn't realize how sensitive it was. But the lusty little thrill, though nice, wasn't anything overwhelming. He could handle this.

Then the hanyou's lips had slipped down and closed over one of his nipples. The sensation was much stronger then. Sesshoumaru's breath hitched in his chest. Oh, that had been....surprisingly exquisite.

But despite the various other kisses, nips, and licks Inuyasha subjected the taiyoukai to, nothing could have prepared him for the jolt that went through him when the hanyou's fingers had slid between his legs and lightly trailed along the length of his cock. Sesshoumaru's eyes had flown wide, although from his vacant expression it did not look like he was actually looking at anything. The effect of that gentle touch had been electric.

It was as if a floodgate had been torn open, releasing a mad flood of suppressed hormones. Inuyasha had at first thought his brother was lying or exaggerating about never having let himself feel physical lust...but after considering the issue for a few moments, he figured it sounded JUST like Sesshoumaru after all, all that discipline and self-control. // Maybe this is why he was so uptight? //

The hanyou smirked gleefully at Sesshoumaru's rather shocked expression, leaning in to nip at the taiyoukai's collarbone as he curled his fingers around his shaft. Oh, how he wanted to nibble on the graceful, exposed length of Sesshoumaru's throat, but he refrained. Sesshoumaru may well take that as either a sign of dominance or equally a showing of his submission - neither would benefit the situation. Besides, there was plenty of other bare skin to nibble on, he could make do.

Sesshoumaru's entire body had gone rigid, his spine arching and his head jerking back so sharply Inuyasha feared for a moment he'd crack his skull off the marble tiling. Sesshoumaru's fingers curled around the edge of the bath so tightly that the blood rushed from them, his claws digging in without effect. Inuyasha saw sightless golden eyes that had gone impossibly wide slowly roll back as Sesshoumaru's eyelids flickered shut. A tattered, broken moan slithered from his throat.

In truth, the extremity of Sesshoumaru's reaction surprised him and he was fascinated watching it. He wasn't sure what he had expected if he had fanned the flames of this beast, exactly...but surely nothing so great. Sesshoumaru seemed about ready to be rent asunder from the sheer force of his awakened arousal. Seeing him so torn with emotion and sensation was, quite possibly, the most erotic thing Inuyasha had ever seen in all his life.

And it wasn't just his brother's surprising sensitivity and response to touch, either. His body in and of itself was simply perfection. Sesshoumaru was built of lean lines and graceful angles, the definition of fluidity, poetry in motion. Inuyasha hadn't had much opportunity to truly observe him over the years and he surely wasn't about to waste the chance now. // Suppose its hard to notice how amazing someone is when they're trying to kill you... hell, one would think he was the one that's going to die at the moment... //

Sesshoumaru's broken thoughts ran on a parallel to Inuyasha's at that moment, and he did indeed wonder if death had come for him. His heartbeat hammered almost deafeningly in his ears, and his body was gripped in sensation far to powerful to control. He felt something primal and heavy awaken deep inside him, gripping him in its claws and whispering, its voice lust and desire, pleasure and pain..urging him to let go, demanding he claim this hanyou for his own, luring him to snatch Inuyasha up, slam him down and just lose himself in the heat of his body.

// No...I refuse... nothing controls this Sesshoumaru... // His thoughts were shattered when Inuyasha's teeth again nipped his ear lightly, those devious fingers sliding over the length of his throbbing, almost painful erection. Oh, gods...it was too much. It wasn't enough. The pleasure was devastating him, unmaking him. Any semblance of self-control or coherency had long since fled. All he knew was that Inuyasha had said to relax...relax? How could he relax when the world was unraveling?

Inuyasha almost purred as he silently reveled in the power he had over Sesshoumaru at that moment. The taiyoukai was still tense as he tried to desperately process the pleasure cascading through him, unable to breathe properly. Small moans that he wasn't even aware of tore free of him and it was only through some distant, desperate effort that he remained still and didn't buck mindlessly into Inuyasha's touch.

Sesshoumaru felt an involuntary quiver run through his body. Something white-hot and blinding was boiling within him and trying to claw its way free. He couldn't breathe, couldn't think, couldn't move...panic abruptly gnawed at the back of his mind, screaming that he was trapped, powerless in the grip of another. Unbidden, the dreadful scar Tsetsukosei left him burned and the rotting, dreadful beast seemed to appear before his eyes with a violent roar, jaws gaping in rage at anyone daring to touch his plaything...

It was too much. Everything collided and shattered. Sesshoumaru's mind simply shut down as his vision exploded into a shower of sparks, his body jolting as his orgasm claimed him. A volatile mix of bone-deep panic, numbing pleasure, confusion, uncertainty, helplessness, and a violent burn of pain roared through him. He made a strangled noise low in his throat and slowly slid into unconsciousness.

Inuyasha saw the rapid-fire emotions overwhelm his brother abruptly over the span of a split second - no matter if it had seemed like a lifetime to Sesshoumaru. Oh, there was definite pleasure there - the proof of that had been in the shuddering climax that had ripped through the taiyoukai.

The hanyou blinked a little in surprise as Sesshoumaru made a soft, strangled noise before the light in his eyes went out. It was as if someone had flipped a switch and drained the life out of him. His eyes dulled before they rolled back and the taiyoukai slid into unconsciousness, bonelessly slipping down into the water.

Inuyasha caught him, not wholly sure what had just happened and restraining the urge to check and see if his brother's melted brain had leaked out his ears. "Sessh?...Sesshoumaru?"

When he received no response, Inuyasha sighed and drug himself out of the bath, hauling Sesshoumaru up after him. "Well, I guess you need to sleep it off. I suppose a few hundred years of repression might do that to ya..."

It was a struggle getting Sesshoumaru somewhat dried and to his bed, but Inuyasha managed. After Sesshoumaru was safely tucked in, the hanyou settled himself down in a chair nearby to wait.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"This wasn't teaching, it was abuse."

"Kaa...I'm da one dat knows best an' all dat."

Miroku rolled his eyes and raked the comb through his damp hair. The run had been thoroughly exhausting, but the bath and long soak afterwards had felt nice. // If only I had a little birdy to join me, think how nice it could have felt then... // "Alright, you made your point. I cheated. How 'bout you show me something useful? What is it you do as a seer?"

Sairex blinked, startled out of his slightly guilty thoughts. He found himself transfixed by the sight of Miroku with his hair unbound, and it took a moment to kick his brain back into gear. "Oh. Er. Right. Zeer...vell, I've got all zorts of talents in dat field, really. Zcrying, zyphering, zeeing..."

"Cyphering?" Miroku arched an eyebrow.

"Yes. Dat's vhere I take zometing...like dis book, for example...and I use my power to...vell, zee vhat it has zeen. All tings have a connection to da zpiritual realm. Anyvay...if you know how to connect to dem, you can read da object's...mrr...memory. Da vords don't really vork too vell to explain, but you'll zee vhat I mean."

"So...this book can tell you things?"

"All books can tell you tings."

"Smartass."

Sairex smirked. "My, my...language....but yes. It's...limited. Books, rocks, rugs...tings don't have conscious memory. Dey get...vague imprints and impressions of tings dat are near dem. Da imagery is stronger if contact is direct, recent, or prolonged. Zo...if zometing happens in a room and I vas not dere...I can zypher on zeveral objects. Den I can piece together vhat might have happened. It isn't alvays easy. Da impressions are rarely clear and can be misleading. Its much easier to do on zometing dat has a conscious mind or a lot of zpiritual energy."

"That's fascinating..." Miroku grinned, truly meaning it. "Can you actually do any real seeing? Mind reading? Predict the future, divine tea leaves, talk to spirits?"

"Mrr...all dose tings, yes. But one ting at a time. I vonder if you can zypher...it is a rare ting. Vould you like to try?"

"Yes, it can't hurt to try," Miroku said with a smile.

Sairex nodded and then plucked one of the intricately carved bone beads from a braid. He concentrated on it for a moment then nodded, handing it to Miroku. "Concentrate, clear your mind. Don't try to force it. Try to...fall into da bead...open yourzelf to it. It's a little difficult to explain...you can't really LOOK for it, you have to approach it...zomewhat zideways."

Miroku nodded and focused. After a long moment and attempting several different techniques, nothing happened. "It seems your bead does not wish to talk to me."

Sairex grinned a bit. "Eh, it doesn't have much to zay anyvay. It'll be easier to ztart vith zometing more connected to da zpiritual realm."

Miroku thought for a moment. "Like Tenseiga or Tetsusaiga?"

Sairex blinked, then nodded. "Mmm...few tings more connected dan dose svords are. Do you tink Lord Zezzhoumaru vould mind if ve looked at it? I'm zure Lord Inuyazha vould let us look at Tetsuzaiga, but...I can't touch it."

The two of them, eager to find out if Miroku could indeed learn Sairex's talent headed off to find the inu brothers. Sairex tapped politely on the door when they finally found them and Inuyasha peered out.

"Stop that noise, Sessh is...sleepin. What do you need?"

Sairex and Miroku bowed in apology in perfect unison. "Ve vere vondering if ve could take a look at Tenzeiga. Noting damaging, drastic, or time conzuming, I promise."

"Oh...well, I'm sure Sessh wouldn't mind. And if he does, I'll deal with it." Inuyasha smirked and retreated into the room before coming back with the sword. "Keh...if you DO do anything to this sword, I'll hunt you both down myself."

Miroku chuckled and patted his friend on the shoulder. "You know we wouldn't. We'll just be down the hall in the library. I need somewhere quiet to concentrate."

When they reached the library, they set the sword down on a small table and pulled chairs up to either side. Sairex reached out to run his fingers along the blade and blinked, jerking his hand back as if he had been scalded. "Oh my...Miroku, if you can't get a zpiritual read off of dat ting, I tink I give up on you as a ztudent."

Miroku chuckled. "That strong, eh?"

Sairex nodded. "Yes. Now...just relax and concentrate. Try to zpeak to da zword's memory....and listen to vhat it has to zay. Dis one zhould be zimple."

Miroku closed his eyes, laying his fingers on the blade. He could feel the energy swarming beneath his fingertips, and it made him smile. It felt warm. Slowly he cleared his mind and began to concentrate.

An indeterminable amount of time passed and nothing happened. He received no images, heard nothing, saw nothing. It made the monk frown - he could FEEL something dancing just out of his reach. He also really wanted to impress Sairex, prove that he could someday be on a level with the raven. Miroku mentally set himself and pushed harder.

Sairex watched silently. He never expected Miroku would get anything at all, even off something like Tenseiga. The fact that he was willing to try and was pushing in generally the correct direction was more than enough to please him. Long minutes passed with nothing, and Sairex could sense Miroku's growing frustration.

// Talk to me, damn you! // Miroku hissed mentally at the sword, snatching up all the energy he had at his disposal and attempting to force the sword to do just that. He didn't really expect it to work, but he was fairly disappointed at his failure.

Sairex gasped and jerked backwards as Miroku suddenly threw a tremendous amount of power at the sword. Unbeknownst to the monk, who was rather tuned out of the physical world and had his eyes closed beside, golden flickers ran across the length of Tenseiga. They built rapidly in intensity and brightness before exploding outwards in a violent rush of wind, knocking both the raven and the surprised monk backwards.

Miroku sat up slowly, rubbing his head. He HURT, suddenly, and felt drained beyond possibility. His well of spiritual energy felt like a bottomless, empty pit - like he had been drained of something vital. // Guess I can't force swords to talk to me, heh...//

Sairex was sitting up too, but his eyes were impossibly wide and he was somewhat slack jawed, staring at a point somewhere behind Miroku. When he finally spoke, his voice was a trembling, stunned, almost horrified whisper. "Mi...Miroku...vhat....have you done?..."

A deep voice from behind him froze the monk's blood in his veins and he couldn't immediately bring himself to turn around.

"Hello, Sairex."


	32. Chapter 31

Pride (In the Name of Love) 31 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Oh, this last list of reviews amused the hell out of me. Everyone seems to have come to one of three conclusions - that Miroku brought Tsetsukosei back, that Miroku brought Inu no Taisho back, or that it's one or the other but they aren't sure. XD I do apologize that it's a little short. I'm still really sick and exhausted. =(

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Miroku swallowed thickly and looked at Sairex. The raven still looked utterly floored. Again, the voice spoke. "Unadulterated shock does not become you, Sairex. Pick your jaw up off my floor. And you, monk...what is it you demand I talk to you about? I do not often comply to demands, but I'm amiable enough to requests."

Miroku slowly turned to look at the tall and striking figure standing behind him. Even if he hadn't seen the grand portraits and dozens of illustrations dedicated to him, Miroku would have recognized the Inu no Taisho by the strong resemblance he bore to his sons. Miroku stared for a moment before looking to Sairex. "In my defense, Sairex...I only did what you asked me to do."

"I don't recall any plans to raise da dead..."

"You told me to communicate with the spirit of Tenseiga..." Miroku gestured grandly to Toga, the Inu no Taisho, and bowed. "Well, we are communicating." Toga arched one eyebrow and then chuckled.

"So, a student showing you up, my friend? You're slipping."

"Kaa...no offense meant of course, m'lord....and not to zound less dan happy to zee you, but...how?" Sairex swiveled his gaze to Miroku. The monk shrugged.

"I was just trying to reach the sword's spirit...and I found SOMETHING so I grabbed it and...pulled. Heh."

"I am not alive, if that is what you're assuming." To illustrate his point, Toga walked over and casually waved his hand through Sairex's chest. The raven let out a startled gasp and shivered.

"Hey! Don't do tings like dat, s'cold..."

Toga chuckled. "Ah, yes, yes. Mm...I have been gone a long time. I will need to know some things."

Miroku nodded. "Actually, you being here could be a good thing."

"Oh? Is something the matter?"

Miroku frowned slightly. "Well...I'm assuming you know about the Tsetsukosei incident."

Toga scowled darkly. "I know my son was fighting him. And because Sairex is here, I can assume he was victorious. That is not a battle that ever should have occurred, and I regret that it fell on my pup."

Sairex sighed. "M'lord, Zezzhoumaru is...vell..."

Toga's amber eyes narrowed. "Did that bastard hurt my pup?"

Miroku had to bite his lip, finding something strangely amusing about anyone babying Sesshoumaru. The humor vanished quickly, however, in light of the question Toga had asked. The monk nodded slowly with a frown. "Yes...very badly. We...Inuyasha and I have been here in the castle because we believed Sesshoumaru had perished. I was helping him out and trying to take care of the paperwork...Inuyasha is not much of a diplomat. However, we learned he had not been killed and eventually were able to retrieve him...but not before the damage had been done."

Toga growled, fists clenching in frustration and impotent rage. He knew there was nothing he could do, but the mere thought of what that beast had probably done to his beautiful, precious pup...."How is he now?"

Sairex mulled the question over before answering. "He is...fragile. Lord Inuyazha is attempting to help him recover. He's hardly left his zide."

After a long moment, Toga nodded. "That is well, then. So they are getting along?...Hmm."

Miroku smiled "Sesshoumaru has changed recently. He's realized humans aren't terrible and has been learning to deal with all manner of emotions."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "That is quite well...and if he's learned to accept humans, it explains why he's getting along with his brother...but what made such a change occur? I do love my son, but he is stubborn and not given to altering his mind once it is set."

The monk grinned happily. "Oh, you'll have to meet her...you see, Sesshoumaru, for whatever reason, was compelled to use Tenseiga and revive a young human girl-child that encountered him when he was injured. Not only did he revive her, he took her on as his ward and has cared for her and looked over her since."

Toga grinned. "Good! But are you sure he did not do it out of a sense more of responsibility than true compassion?"

Miroku chuckled. "When you meet Rin, you'll understand. She's grown and is a young woman now. She's...oh, I don't know. Probably the liveliest, cheeriest, most...bouncy...person you could ever hope to meet. And she absolutely adores Sesshoumaru. No one, not even him, could live next to her for long and not react. She has a....an innocence about her that is just...amazing. Trust me. You'll understand when you meet her. Er. Whenever she gets back, that is."

"My son let his ward out of his protection for any reason?" Toga found it hard to believe. Miroku looked at Sairex uneasily.

"Er. Well. She was in danger and...Sesshoumaru was imprisoned. Inuyasha is friends with more humans than just me and one of them lives...far away in a very safe location. So Rin is staying with her for now."

"I see. Mm. I suppose I shall stop asking you questions and being curious and simply go to my pups directly. I would like to meet my youngest. We shall speak soon." With that, Toga strode off calmly, walked through the wall, and was gone.

Miroku stared after him for a long time before looking to Sairex with a smirk. "How's that for communicating with the spirit of the sword?"

Sairex rolled his eyes. "Oh, hush. Ve vill...ztick to more zimple tings for a vhile. Da next zpirit you might accidentally zummon might not be zo benevolent." Despite his words, Sairex flashed Miroku a grin. Impressed, he surely was.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga stood next to Sesshoumaru's bed for an indeterminable length of time. Inuyasha had slid off to find some dinner and wasn't present.

Sesshoumaru wasn't thrashing at the moment, but obviously had been recently. A light sheen of sweat dampened his skin and the sheets were tangled around him. The angry red marks of Tsetsukosei's scar radiated out tiny red lines. Sesshoumaru's claws were dug deeply into his mattress and he was breathing heavily. A low, inhuman whine tore itself from him, and Toga had seen enough. He had never wished that he was able to touch someone as much as he wished it right now.

"My Sesshoumaru."

Deep in the younger taiyoukai's mind the familiar voice echoed. This voice he obeyed without hesitation or reserve, it was ingrained into him. Haunted golden eyes flickered open and slowly came to a stop on the figure of his father standing next to his bed. When he spoke, his voice cracked and trembled. "So I...truly have gone mad...I am hallucinating."

"No, I'm real enough. Your monk friend accidentally called my spirit from the underworld, it seems."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and he sat up abruptly. His self-derisive tone melted into one of trembling disbelief. "M...my Lord Father?...It is truly you...?"

"Yes, my pup."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and let his head fall forward, fingers clenching into fists. He felt the heat of tears behind his eyelids and did not bother to fight them. "I...oh, I am...so sorry...for what I've said, what I've felt, what I've done..."

Toga blinked and sat down. He found that, with a concentrated effort, he could make himself solid enough to touch and did so so he could rest a hand on his son's shoulder. "My Sesshoumaru, it is alright. I'm no fool. You seem to forget it was I that raised you from a tiny mewling pup. And over those years I learned to read you fairly well. There is often a gulf between what you say and what you mean. I know the things you said in anger were simply that. And I can accept if you cannot accept the fact that I do not have issue with humans."

"I understand now," Sesshoumaru said softly. "About...humans. I understand. Forgive me my lack of insight and the poor judgment I passed on you, my Lord Father."

Toga smiled widely. "Of course. You are young yet, and we all make mistakes. The difference is whether or not you learn from them."

Sesshoumaru had an almost undeniable urge to fling himself into his father's arms at that moment, but refrained. "Oh, my Lord Father...I have missed you." The admission tore itself from him, his voice a broken whisper. "I do not know what to do..."

Toga's heart felt like it was about to snap as he saw the naked grief and raw emotion displayed on his son's face. He knew Sesshoumaru better than anyone, and to see him so broken and vulnerable was unprecedented. He had no compulsions about pulling his son into his arms protectively, in a way he hadn't since...well. Since Sesshoumaru was young. As he grew, it would have injured his pride to be so coddled, to give in to such an open display of affection.

Right now, in the extremity of his confusion and still struggling to find a way to deal with his trauma...Sesshoumaru made absolutely no effort to resist. He was beyond feeling any shame for his need for comfort or the tears that slid unbidden down his cheeks. He instinctively clung to the only being in all the world that had ever made him feel safe.

Toga let out a soothing rumble, low in his chest, and held Sesshoumaru tightly, lightly stroking his hair. Inside, he was both horrified and enraged beyond reason that ANYONE could bring his beloved pup to such a state. A horrible sense of guilt welled up in him - Tsetsukosei had been HIS enemy, his problem to deal with. The beast had made no secret of his lust for Toga's pretty puppy, even at that young age. At the time, Toga had thought his interest in Sesshoumaru was an idle threat, just a barb to gouge him with...a demand he would never meet just so the dracolich would have excuse to fight him further in the future. And now, his pup had paid for his lack of foresight.

"Oh, my dear Sesshoumaru...I am so sorry..." he whispered, curling his mokomokos protectively around his son.


	33. Chapter 32

Pride (In the Name of Love) 32 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Less sick, still coughing my fool head off. And two days off! Rawr! I could use a lil R&R. And for the record - Sairex is SO very Miroku-resistant. He's TOTALLY going to win that bet, yep.

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Inuyasha froze when he opened the door to his brother's room. A pair of sharp golden eyes immediately leveled on him. He felt as if he had just been ripped open and laid out, gone over piece by piece and assessed in the split second that gaze stayed on him. The hanyou repressed the urge to shudder. The gaze on him immediately softened and a smile twitched Toga's lips.

Inuyasha was confused, oh so confused. It sunk in with a start what he was seeing in the room, but it made no sense to him. Sesshoumaru was curled up against the chest of a man who looked just like...but...

"Ah. I am glad you have arrived."

Sesshoumaru's spine went rigid when he realized Inuyasha had shown up and he straightened, making a valiant and mostly successful effort to wipe the emotion from his face. Toga released him and stood, walking over to stand before Inuyasha.

"What the FUCK is going on?!" Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he fumbled for his sword, jerking it out and pointing it at his father.

"Stupid hanyou, what are you doing?!" Sesshoumaru's voice was bitingly acidic, quite possibly the most livid tone Inuyasha had ever heard from his brother. He blinked in surprise, but his surprise was compounded a moment later when Toga snapped his gaze to his elder son.

"Sesshoumaru!"

Sesshoumaru flinched as if struck and, to Inuyasha's complete shock, lowered his eyes submissively. "My apologies."

Toga nodded before returning his attention to Inuyasha. "Put the sword away, pup."

Inuyasha growled. "I'll do what I want with my sword, and I'm not your pup!"

"Actually...you are."

"Don't fuck with me. I don't know how you managed to trick Sesshoumaru, maybe it's cause he got a little scrambled, but our father is DEAD, and has been since-"

"Inuyasha!" Toga's voice boomed suddenly, his tone stopping Inuyasha's rant in its tracks. The sheer note of command and authority in it made the hanyou's ears flatten back and he cringed, feeling suddenly guilty. "Do not speak ill of your brother. I will not tolerate it from either of you. Am I perfectly clear?"

"I'm not sure, I'm a little scrambled," Sesshoumaru hissed darkly.

Inuyasha frowned. "Sessh, I'm sorry...but...seriously...this CAN'T be real...you're usually a bit quicker on catching these things than me."

"Enough," Toga said with a low, warning growl. Inuyasha set his jaw defiantly, stubbornly...but lost a little of his determination at Sesshoumaru's immediate reaction.

"Yes, my Lord Father."

"Well...well you may have him fooled, but not me. Our father is d--"

"Dead. Yes. I am. However, your human monk friend inadvertently seems to have pulled my soul free of the underworld. For lack of a better term, you can say I am a ghost."

Inuyasha gawked, then edged his way over to Sesshoumaru before speaking in a harsh whisper. "Sessh...is...is he..."

The cold look Sesshoumaru gave him for DARING to doubt the word of their Lord Father was all the response Inuyasha needed.

"Oh..." Inuyasha slowly made his way back over, putting away Tetsusaiga and standing before his father, his expression sheepish and somewhat cowed. "I...I always wanted to meet you."

"Well, now you will have your chance. It is something I will enjoy as well. Perhaps we can chat over dinner?" Inuyasha nodded blankly. Toga turned his gaze to Sesshoumaru. "Will that suit you, my Sesshoumaru...?"

Sesshoumaru nodded silently.

"Come then, Inuyasha...let your brother dress and we shall await him in the dining hall."

Inuyasha nodded numbly and allowed his father to escort him out of the room, still floored and not at all coming to grips with this situation just yet.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex sighed as he stared at the ceiling. His mind was a whirlwind of shock and confusion. He'd never in his wildest dreams believed Miroku capable of something like this! Admittedly, he suspected that there were some fairly unique circumstances surrounding Tenseiga and Toga's spirit, but even still...

A knock at his door startled him from his contemplation and he sat up, heading over to answer it. One of the servants greeted him with a polite bow.

"Greetings, m'lord. Lord Miroku has humbly requested you dress formally and join him in the ballroom."

Sairex cocked an eyebrow incredulously before nodding. "Very vell. Inform him I zhall join him zhortly."

The servant bowed politely before scurrying off down the hall.

Amused, and more than a little curious as to what Miroku was planning, the raven headed to his closet and began sifting through things. He had a decent wardrobe already, even if none of it was custom-fit for him. Several pieces had to be modified to account for his wings, but it was a simple enough task for the palace staff. It had taken him all of two minutes to be promoted to Chief Advisor, and Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha had saw to it that he had anything he needed. All in all, Sairex thought it was a pretty good deal.

After dressing himself in a white silk shirt and black silk pants, he touched up his hair a bit, smoothed his feathers, and examined himself in the mirror. Deciding he looked quite ravishing, Sairex headed out to the ballroom, not entirely sure what to expect and more than a little amused at the invitation.

A pair of guards greeted him at the door and bowed politely, stepping aside to allow him entry. "Greetings. You are expected."

Sairex nodded and entered the room, blinking in surprise as the doors slowly slid shut behind him. The curtains were drawn, and a lone table was set up for a candlelit dinner in the middle of the floor. Rose petals and candles were arranged artfully around the room. Soft music filtered into the room from somewhere. Sairex blinked as he tried to locate the source - it seemed to be coming from some sort of strange machine.

Curious, the raven headed over to examine the device, but stopped when he heard Miroku's amused voice behind him. "It was a gift from Kagome, our friend from the future. I forget what she called it, but it runs off of little metal tubes with energy inside. Batteries."

Sairex whirled and promptly forgot the CD player, aware that he was gaping but unable to stop himself. Miroku looked...incredible. The monk was dressed to kill, wearing a set of black silk pants and shirt with an intricate golden dragon snaking down the length of the outfit. A slender gold chain at his throat made a stunning accent. His hair swung loose just above his shoulders and his smile was devastating. He bowed with a grin and produced a rose from ... well, Sairex really didn't know where. "Greetings...you look wonderful. I'm glad you could join me."

The raven was speechless for a long moment as he accepted the rose. He stared wide-eyed at the monk. Miroku finally smirked and smoothed his hands over his shirt. "What...don't recognize me without the robes? I admit, this is kind of...strange...but I was aiming to impress."

"You look amazing," Sairex finally blurted, acutely aware of and internally cursing the blush that had leapt to his cheeks. Miroku flashed him another dazzling grin before pulling out a chair at the table for him.

"Thank you. Please, sit...dinner's already prepared, they're just waiting for me to ring them."

Sairex did as he was bidden and simply stared as Miroku took his seat across from him. "But...vhy are you...doing all dis...?"

"Well, I can't very well bet you that I can court and seduce you if I don't make an effort..."

"Kaa...you'll need more dan a couple candles..." Sairex sniffed, but Miroku simply chuckled. "Oh, alright, fine. I admit, I'm impressed. Dis is da most romantic ting anyone has ever done for me."

"A good start, then. By the time I'm finished, you won't know which way is up." Before Sairex could retaliate, the servers arrived with trays of elaborately prepared food and delicacies, as well as a few bottles of extremely fine wine. "Inuyasha was more than happy to make sure the staff knew I was to have anything I requested."

The raven chuckled. "Zo I zee...attempting to ply me vith alcohol? Lower my inhibitions?"

Miroku poured them each a glass before giving the raven an innocent smile. "I hardly think the wine would be necessary."

"Vell, you're certainly rather zure of yourzelf, aren't you..."

Dinner proved to be an enjoyable experience, with none of the awkward breaches in conversation that occur on so many dates. There was no need for so much idle chatter, after all - they already knew each other backwards and forwards from the time they had spent sharing the same body. Their conversation was largely irrelevant - they spoke more to hear the sound of each other's voices than for any real need of words.

Several glasses of wine and a delicious meal later, and Miroku grinned and got to his feet, extending his hand. "Shall we dance?"

Sairex blinked slowly, feeling a little flushed. Drinking wasn't something he was used to, but it was surely a warm and fuzzy sensation. He accepted Miroku's hand and stood. "I'll have you know...dat dancing is...not one of da tings I'm terribly zkilled at..."

"Don't worry, just follow my lead." Before the raven could protest, Miroku's arms slid around his waist and he was swept out onto the dance floor.

If either of them had any lingering doubts about a relationship between them, it was melted away in the slow and intimate rhythm of the music. They swayed together in what couldn't really be called a dance, but neither of them much cared about their dancing technique.

Sairex felt his cheeks flushing brighter and he doubted it was entirely from the wine, suspecting it very much might have something to do with the monk he was so...when had he ended up pressed so tightly against Miroku, exactly? Something about this monk, this human...undid him. Miroku was simply a force of nature...a gravitational pull that had sucked the raven in and refused to let him go. Damn the consequences, he no longer cared.

Miroku had always made something of an art of seduction, even if he didn't often properly employ it, and had been drawn to more beautiful prospects - invariably female - than he could count. In his mad drive to acquire an heir before his wind tunnel killed him, he had not stopped to consider the possibility of taking a male lover. The idea had never been repulsive to him - it simply hadn't occurred to him. After Naraku had been defeated and he didn't need that heir...well, old habits die hard. Changing had not crossed his mind. The game was just part of his life.

And then Sairex came out of nowhere and everything changed. Even before Miroku had ever laid eyes on the lithe, fair-boned creature, he had desired him. Strongly. Powerfully. It made a complete mockery of any lusty thoughts he had had before in his life. Something PRIMAL had twisted up in him when his soul had met the raven's, and he knew a want...no, a NEED...that he never had before.

Without a further thought, Miroku leaned down and captured Sairex's mouth with his own, leisurely plundering its depths. His arms instinctively curled around the youkai's waist as Sairex's hooked around his neck. They kissed until both of them were panting and breathless.

With a soft, pleased sigh Miroku leaned down again, trailing fiery nibbles and kisses down the raven's throat, sucking gently at the juncture of his neck and his collarbone. One hand slid up to idly tease the base of one feathery wing, the other sliding up under Sairex's shirt and holding him by the waist. A soft mewl escaped the raven and his knees almost buckled. Had Miroku not been right there, he likely would have fallen. He wasn't entirely sure if Miroku realized exactly how sensitive the bases of his wings were - but the monk must have had an idea because he was massaging them to devastating effect.

Miroku pulled away enough to take a look at the raven, lust smoldering in his eyes. It was more than simple desire, they both knew it - even if neither of them would admit to it just yet. The sight of Sairex, his cheeks flushed and his lips swollen from kisses threatened to undo Miroku. The monk restrained the urge to throw him down to the floor and simply have his way right there. His voice was husky when he finally spoke, his fingers still teasing the raven's wings and rubbing along his bare skin under his shirt. "So...I win?"

"V...vhat?" Sairex managed to gasp, his eyes almost rolled back in his head. Coherency seemed to be largely beyond him.

"Our bet...tell me I win..."

"Nnnn...." Sairex struggled to deny it, but a strangled gasp was torn from him as the monk squeezed his wing. "Ohhh! Fine, fine, you vin...!"

"Would you...like to go to my room?"

"I thought you'd never ask..."


	34. Chapter 33

Pride (In the Name of Love) 33 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So...sorry for the lateness of this post, I did the best I could. I received some...really really bad news. Long story short, my daddy just learned that the infection we thought gone from his foot came back and he's on the way to the hospital to possibly have the foot...maybe his whole leg...hacked off. On top of that, his best friend (a good friend of mine too) just got diagnosed with terminal lung cancer and was given up to five years. Great day.

Sorrow. =( However, I needed to write to attempt to distract myself...so the chapter may seem a little odd or broken at parts, and I apologize for that. My head's not all together just now. Most of it was written before I got the news or I probably couldn't have done it today. There may be a break for a little bit until I know more about what's going on, so if I can't update daily for a few...don't worry. I'm not losing interest. Just...yeah.

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They barely made it back to the room. Sairex, in fact, probably wouldn't have much minded if they hadn't. He found his back abruptly pinned to the wall next to the door and was more than happy to return Miroku's hungry kiss. The monk fumbled for the door handle with one hand, but was quite distracted and the task took far longer than it should have.

Eventually he managed to get the door open. Without warning he grabbed Sairex by the hips and hoisted him easily off the ground. The raven let out a startled, if muffled, noise and immediately hooked his arms and legs around Miroku so he wouldn't fall. The monk smirked a bit - there was little danger of him dropping Sairex. He weighed FAR less than a human his size would weigh. It fascinated Miroku for a moment...and then he promptly forgot about it as they crashed through the door into his room.

He paused to flick his gaze to the door, wondering how he was going to shut it without giving up his armload of raven, when Sairex shot out one of his wings and flicked it shut himself. "That's handy..."

"Dey have deir uses."

"Mm. I think I like being able to toss you around," Miroku chuckled, proceeding to deposit Sairex on the bed, moving immediately to hover over him.

"I could destroy you vithout ever needing to touch you, I don't need to be physically powerful."

"Mm, why would you want to do that?..." Miroku didn't give Sairex a chance to answer, simply leaning in to resume their nearly frantic kiss from earlier. Sairex returned the kiss with equal passion, nipping lightly at Miroku's lower lip and drawing a startled noise from the monk. "Hey now, no biting..."

Sairex smirked and Miroku took advantage of the fact they had both come up for air to tug the raven's shirt out of the way, hurling it across the room. He fumbled briefly with his own, unused to wearing anything other than his robes. Sairex laughed softly and batted his hands away, nimble taloned fingers making short work of the buttons. "Those claws of yours look positively deadly up close..." Miroku said with a smirk.

"Dey are," Sairex assured him, flexing and wiggling his fingers in a mock-threatening fashion.

"I'm not afraid," the monk assured him before sweeping his eyes down the raven. He was fascinated with the lines and swirls of the inky black tattoos that wound their way down Sairex's sides, seeming to originate from his spine and wrap around towards his front. "Why the tattoos?"

Sairex blushed a bit. "Kaaa...dey are mostly ceremonial, but zome of da patterns have meaning. Dey are zigns of my family, my tribe. Zome are marks of my powers and ztation, tributes if you vill."

"I love them...in fact, I think I'd like to see more of them," Miroku responded, his fingers moving to unfasten the raven's pants. Mentally, he cursed his own pants...they felt entirely too tight and uncomfortable right now, a problem he never had with his robes. However, he had enjoyed the startled, pleased expression Sairex had given this outfit enough that it was worth the small sacrifice.

Soon he had the raven bare and paused to admire the beautiful creature. He liked the contrast of Sairex's strikingly black hair and equally dark wings against his pale skin and the white silk sheets. In fact, he found he very much liked everything about the raven. "Mm...I said I'd find out how you tasted when I got back to myself..." With a smirk, Miroku leaned in to nip gently at Sairex's throat before trailing his lips down his chest, pausing to flick his tongue across one of the raven's nipples. Sairex reacted with a throaty moan that sent a delicious shiver of lust through the monk.

Miroku steadily continued to work his way lower, settling comfortably between Sairex's legs and pausing to gaze up at his lover, drinking in the sight as his hands lightly massaged his thighs. Sairex was trying hard not to squirm, already painfully aroused and growing increasingly desperate for more than Miroku's teasing. A strangled noise tore itself out of his throat and his fingers flew to grip the sheets tightly as his wish was granted - the monk's tongue trailed ever so slowly up the length of his erection.

Miroku watched Sairex through his eyelashes as he lightly ran his tongue around the head of the raven's cock, pausing to flick it into the slit ever so briefly. He slid his hands down to grip his lover's hips and hold him still. "Mm, careful," he murmured between licks, "I've not done this before."

The monk couldn't be sure that the indecipherable moaning jumble that was his response was even in a language he knew - or if it was even words, but he didn't suppose he really needed words to figure out what it was his lover was after. After a few more light, teasing licks, he swooped down abruptly and swallowed as much of the raven as he could manage.

Sairex's eyes flew wide and he let out a startled half-shriek, stars exploding behind his eyes as he almost burst on the spot. His back arched sharply, his breath catching in his throat. "Oh my GODS...nnnn...!" Apparently, what Miroku lacked in experience he was doing a damn fine job of making up for in enthusiasm and passion. The raven fell back weakly, sobbing harshly for breath and teetering on the edge of climax - but every time he'd get too close, Miroku seemed to sense it and backed off. It was torture, but oh, it was SO exquisite.

Miroku reached over, his hand snaking into the drawer of the nightstand. He had been prepared for things to end up this way at some point or another, as was evident by the small jar of oil he withdrew. At this point, however, Sairex didn't even notice. In fact, it was fairly unlikely Sairex would have noticed anything short of the castle being torn apart by a cataclysmic, world-ending force.

Oh, but the monk's lips felt so good as they slid over his aching shaft... Sairex moaned again, his body quivering with the need to release. Inexperienced Miroku might have claimed to be, but pleasure was pleasure and no matter how much finesse one may lack, it was fairly hard for this to be done in a way that felt anything but good. He forced his body to relax and struggled to breathe when he felt Miroku's oil-slicked finger lightly teasing his entrance with slow, massaging circles. Oh, it had been such a long time since he had taken a lover like this...Tsetsukosei's torturing didn't count.

Sairex lost what little ability to think he had left as the teasing finger slowly pressed into him. A jolt traveled through him and his breath caught, the sensation almost overwhelming him...and then Miroku drove his head down, pulling him almost completely down his throat as his finger crooked JUST right and hit the little bundle of nerves inside Sairex's body...

The raven couldn't help himself, his orgasm overtook him with shocking intensity. His body attempted to jerk upwards but Miroku's unoccupied arm was holding him still. His talons drove blindly into the sheets beneath him, though he didn't care about the holes the razor-sharp hooks tore in the expensive fabric.

Miroku slowly released Sairex's cock from his mouth, giving it a few more long, slow licks to assure that it had been properly cleaned. While he continued his gentle but maddening ministrations, he slowly slid a second finger in to join the first, moving them in a gentle scissoring motion. He didn't stop with his gentle preparations or licks until he had worked the raven back to a state of full arousal. By this time, Miroku's breathing was harsh and his eyes dark with lust.

"Oh, Sairex...I can't wait anymore...I need you..."

"Nnnn....oh yes...please..." The throaty begging was more than enough to settle the matter. Miroku hastily squirmed out of his pants before repositioning himself between the raven's legs. He poured some of the oil into his palm before setting the container aside, a ragged moan leaking from his throat as he stroked it over his own erection. He couldn't remember a time he had been so aroused in all his life.

Sairex quivered as he felt Miroku's body press against his, another moan escaping him. "Oh, gods, Miroku...I'm a demon, you von't hurt me...PLEASE...I need you NOW...!" The demand proved to be too much for the monk to resist. His hips snapped forward and he buried himself inside the raven in one smooth, hard thrust.

Sairex let out a sharp gasp, his back arching and his wingtips curling inward. The brief pain only added to the intense pleasure of being so completely filled by this incredible human monk. Miroku's gasp matched his own, and the monk struggled to regain something of his composure, frozen in place.

Once Miroku thought he could move without shattering utterly, he shifted his grip to the raven's waist and slowly rolled his hips. Ohhh, but it felt SO good. "Mmn....oh, Sairex...you're so tight....I've never felt anything so good..."

The raven moaned in response, heartily agreeing with the sentiment. Soon Miroku had settled into a mind-blowing rhythm of smooth, deep thrusts that left them both breathless and overwhelmed with sensation. Sairex hooked his legs loosely around Miroku, struggling to keep from latching on to the man with his talons out of the desperate need to have something to hold on to. He almost forgot himself entirely when he felt one of Miroku's hands slide around behind him to tease at the bases of his wings even as his mouth was captured in a bruising kiss.

The friction rapidly built to unbearable levels. Miroku groaned as he increased his pace, pounding into his lover with abandon. Nothing else existed in all the world except this pretty, hot, tight little creature he was nailing to the mattress. He shifted ever so slightly to curl his unoccupied hand around Sairex's cock.

A mere few moments of the added sensation proved too much for Sairex and he hit his orgasm with a loud cry that sounded like it might have been an attempt at Miroku's name, had his mind been capable of that much coherency. The feel of that already impossibly tight body suddenly spasming around him was too much. Miroku snapped his hips forward, burying himself as deeply in his lover as he could before he came in a way that could almost be described as violent, his hot seed exploding into the trembling body beneath him and around him.

It took a long while for Miroku to overcome the shaking weakness in his limbs enough to move. He stretched out next to Sairex and automatically pulled his lover into his arms. The raven had no objections, snuggling up against him contentedly, pressing a soft kiss to the nearest available skin. "Mm..."

Sairex finally gave Miroku a crooked, affectionate grin. "I can't zay I vas overly zorry to lose dis bet..."

"Indeed...remind me again why gambling is a bad thing and I'm not supposed to do it as a monk..."

"Zometing about da zex vith demons part?"

"Oh well, I never did pay much attention at temple anyways."

Sairex chuckled and closed his eyes. "And for dat, I'm very glad..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha sat down at the table, noting how his father instinctively claimed the seat at the head. Toga folded his hands and looked at his younger son. "I hope that time permits and I have ample opportunity to get to know you. In fact, I do not intend to return to the underworld without a fight, so I pray your monk has no such intentions. In fact, I ultimately will seek a way to revive myself. However, at present, I am forced to deal with a most troubling issue."

Inuyasha nodded. "Sesshoumaru..." A frown stole across his features. "That bastard hurt him really bad."

Toga winced inwardly. "So I...gathered. I have not...seen him in tears since he was very, very small. It was always so important to him to try and...keep a straight face, not be weak...to impress me." A tiny smile flitted across the taiyoukai's lips at the memory of his eldest son as a small child, defiantly balling his fists and biting his quivering lip, struggling to keep his composure after he took a hard fall in a practice session.

"Yeah, well...that sorta ran a little rampant and he decided killing off any trace of emotions would be the way to go."

"So I've gathered," Toga sighed. "But its not possible. You can repress them, you can control them, but you can't kill them. So my Sesshoumaru puts up a front but feels the same things anyone else feels underneath, even if he avoids acknowledging it. He wasn't ready for the responsibility that was thrust upon him with my death."

Inuyasha looked vaguely guilty, and Toga smiled, grabbing the hanyou's hand and looking him straight in the eye. "It is not a decision I regret in any way, and I would give my life a thousand times over to protect you or your brother." Inuyasha couldn't help but smile - his father spoke with such calm authority and assertiveness, never leaving any room for anyone to doubt anything he said. He was already starting to see why his brother had practically worshiped the man.

"So my Sesshoumaru has a human girl, does he?"

Inuyasha scowled. "Keh...there's a long story. Yeah, the kid's really got her claws in his heart, but he's tryin' to push her away 'for her own good'. He's afraid he'll hurt her or ruin her somehow just by....I dunno. He wants me to tell her that he's dead so she won't come back for him."

Toga frowned and mentally cursed Tsetsukosei again. To make his pup feel so unworthy, to make him afraid to let himself love...!

Before the conversation could go any further, Sesshoumaru slid into the room soundlessly. He was dressed in his much more familiar white outfit, minus armor. Inuyasha hoped it was a good sign, but was not sure. Right now, Inuyasha wasn't sure about anything.


	35. Chapter 34

Pride (In the Name of Love) 34 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I'm taking extreme liberties with Toga's character cause I really don't have much to base him off of. So yeah. And yes, he is going to unconsciously do a LOT of the things he used to do when he was chief...sitting at the head of the table is just the tip of the iceberg. It's just...loooooong habit.

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Two figures stood alone in the sinking sunlight on the top of a rocky outcropping. One was a short, spindly youkai, a weak but fast and loyal thing. The other was tall and thin, his features concealed beneath a thick hooded cloak. After a long moment, the hooded figure addressed the small demon.

"That is it?"

"Yes, my lord. This is the castle of the lords of the West, ancestral home of the royal inuyoukai and current home of the Lord Sessho--ack!" The small demon struggled as long, ashen-skinned fingers tightened around it's throat, hoisting it off the ground. It was lifted to stare into the night-black eyes of its master as it struggled, panicked, to breathe. At such close range, his master's hideously disfigured face was visible under the hood of his cloak. His master's voice - with a permanent if slight lisp from a savagely torn lip, sent ice through his veins as his vision faded.

"I told you to not speak his name in my presence, wretch." With casual ease, he snapped the small demon's neck and hurled the twitching corpse aside. His gaze returned to the massive, elegant building and he nodded to himself. The preparations were almost complete.

With a thought, the tall cloaked figure turned away and melted into the shadows as if he never was.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Greetings, my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru bowed slightly, dipping his head. "Greetings, my Lord Father...brother."

"Er. Yeah, hey, Sessh."

Sesshoumaru allowed himself the slightest of scowls at his brother's lack of decorum before taking his seat. Toga felt a smirk twitching his lips. Sometimes, his elder son was entirely too formal and proper...and it seemed his younger was the opposite. The same was true about many things - they complimented each other in a strange, often violently clashing way. // No wonder they fight so much, if they are so opposite in all things! //

"My Sesshoumaru, it has come to my attention that there is a brief but important matter I shall need to attend, and your brother will have to come with me."

Sesshoumaru arched an eyebrow, phrasing his words carefully. "This Sesshoumaru is capable of being alone without disastrous consequences, but...I do not mean to offend or question, my Lord Father, but how is it you have a business matter troubling you already whilst you are still in such a...transient state?"

Inuyasha cocked his head slightly to one side, squinting at his brother. Toga chuckled softly and patted his younger son's arm. "Do not worry, my boy, I speak fluent Sesshoumaru." He turned his attention to his elder son. "Translation, what am I involved in already when I'm still dead and shouldn't have my fingers in anybody's pies just yet?" Sesshoumaru blushed slightly and ducked his head.

"Er...actually, since I'm going too, I'd like to know what exactly you're involved in that involves me. And it involves pie?"

Toga blinked and then laughed outright. "Ah...well, I'll fill you in later. First, I have other matters to attend. My Sesshoumaru, how are the affairs of state?"

The younger taiyoukai was studying the tabletop intently. "I would not know, my Lord Father."

Whatever answer he had been expecting, that wasn't it. Toga's eyebrows shot up. "Explain yourself."

Inuyasha saw the slight flinch that hit Sesshoumaru - Toga DID have a way with commanding people. He'd never seen Sesshoumaru so meek and mild. However, he moved to save his brother the explanation, figuring Sesshoumaru would give it a more complicated spin than necessary. "While he was gone, I've been in charge. He hasn't been back long."

Toga's gaze softened as he looked at Sesshoumaru. "Forgive me, my son. It is hard to avoid certain uncomfortable remarks when I am so removed from what has been happening. I do not mean to be callous."

"You need not apologize, my Lord Father."

"Yes, I do. I'm bound by all the same rules you are, pup. Just because I am your elder it does not give me right to upset you, nor would I wish to do so. I'm capable of making mistakes and social blunders, just as anyone."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly. Before their conversation could continue further, dinner arrived. Toga politely refused - considering he was still technically dead, food would be an utterly pointless effort. Sesshoumaru accepted his meal and was soon rearranging everything on his plate slowly but eating very little. Inuyasha, on the other hand, attacked his dinner ferociously, enjoying every brief moment of it's existence.

Toga talked amiably with Inuyasha throughout most of the meal. He attempted several times to lure Sesshoumaru into the conversation, but his elder son was obviously not very talkative at the moment. He talked with Inuyasha to get a feel of his hanyou son's life and personality. In the back of his mind, however, part of him was both raging and wailing. Sesshoumaru's eyes were devoid of any spark of life, empty of the fiery flash of intelligence or temper or simple enjoyment. Yes, things were very, very wrong with his elder pup. The truth was, he had asked Sesshoumaru if he minded being alone out of a growing fear that to leave his elder pup alone for any length of time may well mean his death. It tore at his heart to think that his precious, brilliant, beautiful Sesshoumaru could possibly be suicidal, but he was not fool enough to deny the possibility.

Sesshoumaru stood abruptly and bowed his head. "If you both will excuse me, I am going to retire for the evening. I am weary."

Inuyasha frowned. The sun hadn't even gone down just yet. "But Sessh, its not..."

Toga interrupted smoothly. "That is fine, Sesshoumaru. I wish you a good evening and hope you rest well."

Inuyasha glanced at his father and then took the cue. "Night, Sessh."

Sesshoumaru nodded and then padded silently out of the room. Inuyasha watched him go, watched the door shut, then turned to peer at his sire. "Alright, what's going on? Where are we going?"

"I would meet with this human girl, and I need you to take me to her."

"Whoa, whoa...that's not a good idea...and I can't."

"Why not?"

"Er...well, it has to do with WHERE she is...really don't know if I can bring you there if you're all...ghosty."

"I see." Toga sighed heavily. "Very well, I will wait on that then. I shall have to speak with Sairex and see if he knows any ways I might regain my physical body. As for my Sesshoumaru...how close are you two now?"

Inuyasha blushed darkly and ducked his head, mumbling something. Toga arched an eyebrow.

"What's that look for? You are...getting along?"

"Oh...well...um..you could put it that way..."

"...Exactly how well are you getting along? Judging from the fact that you're as red as your haori, I'm beginning to get a little suspicious."

"Ummm...Well, we...I mean...er..."

Toga smirked in sudden understanding. "Ahhh. I'm assuming you've been a bit more friendly than what is generally accepted as...brotherly." Inuyasha proved, in response, that he could indeed blush even more fiercely. Toga appeared to be considering this for a moment before nodding. "I see. Perhaps...this could be a good thing. Are you mated?"

"No! We just...just...well there was this one time..and...fuck, I didn't want his only time to be with that fucking THING...and...I don't know. Can we not have this conversation?"

// His only...!... // Toga frowned deeply. // So he never took a mate after all... // "Forgive me, I didn't mean to embarrass you. Hmm."

"Hmm? What 'hmm'? What are you thinking?" Inuyasha was suddenly wary.

"Perhaps it is not a bad idea for those that care for him to acclimate him to positive feelings. He is too repressed, physically and emotionally, and if he doesn't begin working through some of that, it will only get worse and it will consume him. My Sesshoumaru can be...obsessive. And I would not see him turn that obsession into one of self-destruction."

Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah, I hear ya. But what's the plan? You and I take turns pouncing on him?" The hanyou snorted. Toga blinked, and Inuyasha's jaw dropped when he saw his father sit back, lost in thought. "You can't POSSIBLY be serious..."

Toga eyed his younger son. "I have no such intentions. And I am not saying to do anything that makes either of you uncomfortable. Merely that your brother could benefit from positive emotional reinforcement. If you have a physical relationship as well, that may prove beneficial as well." His words were murmured softly, as if he was still lost in thought. After finishing, he stood.

"I suppose I shall speak with Sairex and the monk. I believe it would be advantageous if I were alive sooner rather than later. Our trip to visit the human will have to be postponed."

"What are you thinking?" Inuyasha squinted a bit. Toga chuckled. "Nothing to worry you, my dear pup. I shall see you on the morrow. Good evening."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex blinked fuzzily at the sharp rap on the door. He groaned in negation and folded his wing over his head, shutting out the light and muffling the noise as he mumbled and curled up tighter against Miroku's chest.

Miroku, however, got a mouth and nose full of feathers and sneezed as he woke up. The sight of his lover hiding under his wing amused him, but his attention was diverted as the knock sounded again.

"Sairex! Monk! I would speak with you both."

"Ack!" Miroku quickly but gently shook his lover. "Sairex, wake up...the Inu no Taisho is at the door for us."

"Da....oh!" Sairex sat bolt upright and then scrambled for clothing. "One moment, m'lord!"

When both of them were decent - even if still largely disheveled - Sairex went to answer the door. Toga looked him slowly up and down and smirked. The raven blushed brightly. "I would speak to you both if you have a few moments, although I am sorry if I interrupted anything."

"No, no...ve vere just...napping."

"Ah, of course."

"Please, have a seat." Miroku gestured to one of the chairs nearby and pulled one up himself, quickly tugging his hair back into a ponytail to keep it out of his face.

"Thank you. I do not know by what manner you have brought my sprit here, but I have no intentions of returning to the realm of the dead. In fact, I need to be rendered physical and alive again, preferably sooner than later. I am hoping you know a way to do this?" Here the demon lord peered at Sairex.

"Kaaa..." Sairex sat for a long moment, lost in thought. "Dis is zometing I've not tried before, m'lord. Mrrr...perhaps ve could use and...modify...Tenzeiga's powers...but I do not know. I vill look into it."

"Thank you. I trust you will succeed. Whether or not you do, however, I wish you to make me a promise."

"Of course."

"My Sesshoumaru must be cared for. My son has been damaged by my own lack of foresight in dealing with Tsetsukosei when I should have. He must not be allowed to sink too deeply into this despair. Should I be unable to remain or the revival fail, promise me you will look after my pups."

"It vould be an honor, my lord."

"I'll do anything I can to help," Miroku added with a faint smile. "Now...I suppose you may wish to be kept abreast of the current affairs of state?"

Toga's eyebrows shot up but he nodded slowly - this human was certainly full of surprises!


	36. Chapter 35

Pride (In the Name of Love) 35 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - To answer someone's question - I'd be rather surprised if you already knew who the cloaked figure was. It will be revealed in due time.

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The dark cloaked figure slowly looked up at the eager messenger demon before him. "Well?" he snapped.

"It is done, my lord. The letter has been delivered to every demon of rank on the list, as per your request."

"Good. Now we wait."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was up at dawn. In truth, he had been up before then, but he didn't bother getting up until the sun had risen. He didn't bother dressing, just remained in his loose-fitting white silk sleeping pants and, of course, his mokomoko. Silently he padded down the hallways. The servants were asleep, and what few guards were posted stiffened and saluted, but he ignored them.

Sesshoumaru headed into his study and closed the door behind him, breathing a sigh of almost-relief. He had not wanted to be seen, just wanted to be by himself. He was full of a strange, if mild, sense of dread and nervousness, and it was upsetting his stomach. He had been in a state of low-key paranoia ever since he had escaped. He had thought Tsetsukosei's death would cure that, and while it HAD helped, it hadn't erased the unpleasant sensation, nor had it removed the nightmares that still plagued him.

He settled into the thick, overstuffed leather chair behind the huge, polished desk with a slight smile. This seemed so ordinary, so normal and...boring...that it helped to calm his jittery nerves. He even afforded himself a small chuckle at his own expense, thinking it absurd that he was actually looking forward to something so mundane as paperwork.

Sesshoumaru tackled the first pile. After looking through his files and doing a bit of review, he had to admit that he was grudgingly impressed with how well Miroku had handled things. Despite his faults, he obviously had a pretty good head on his shoulders. However, Sesshoumaru was far better at this game due to more hours of practice than he cared to think about, and he was able to chew through the pile faster than Miroku would have been able. He scowled a bit at having to use the royal seal instead of signing his name - he rather enjoyed signing his name, there was something satisfying about it - but it was a small matter. It wouldn't do to let the other demons know he was back just yet.

Soon his gaze turned to the newest scrolls, envelopes, and documents. Sesshoumaru frowned. It seemed an absolutely absurd amount of missives had come in since the previous day. Usually, the only time so many documents came at once was when invitations of some sort had been sent out. No demon lord would dare slight the House of Inu no Taisho by not responding immediately. However, there were no social events that Sesshoumaru knew of upcoming, not even any close. Further, he couldn't imagine his brother setting up a ball or such thing, or even having the idea come to him.

Curious, the taiyoukai plucked an overly elaborate scroll with a familiar seal from the pile. He knew automatically that it was from the Eastern Lord, Kanjiro - they'd exchanged a disgusting amount of carefully veiled threats, letters, grudging treaties and the like over the years.

Snapping the seal, he opened it and began to read. At first, it made no sense to him. As he read further, Sesshoumaru's skin began to pale and his hands began to shake. Tears stung the corner of his eyes and a low whine echoed in his throat. The letter was short, but it didn't need to be longer.

Quivering, he tore into another letter from the pile...and another...another...another...the damning words flowed before his eyes.

Most of the missives were expressing sympathy, condolences, or regret - but none of them surprise - at the way he, Sesshoumaru, had brought great shame to the House of Inu no Taisho. It took a few letters to piece together, but somehow, word had gotten out that he had been taken as a mate to a dragon youkai - and had the very obvious mark to prove of his submission - and had killed his staff and abandoned his lands to run off with his mate, leaving the rebuilding and the rule to his younger brother.

However, his mate had summararily discarded him as a whore and a traitor. Several of the missives offered to help hunt him down to attempt to avenge some of the shame brought to the House. There were too many insults to count - how they had expected it of him, he was too young, too pretty, too stuck up, too prideful...

Sesshoumaru finally dropped the letter he was currently holding, unable to contain his shaking. No matter the lack of truth of the rumors now - his House was shamed, and it was because of him. His father's memory was shamed because of him.

If he stayed, it would be a massive political blow to Inuyasha. His brother daring grant him 'sanctuary' after what he had allegedly done would be viewed in a highly unfavorable light. Practically the entire youkai world now thought of him as nothing more than a dragon's whore and a traitor.

He couldn't leave, either...where would he go? It wasn't as if his appearance was common. The entire youkai population would be out to kill him, to hunt him down like an animal. Sesshoumaru was strong but he wasn't invincible.

This was disastrous...ruinous and disastrous. The sudden thought of having to face his father after this made him moan in anguish. He could not...he WOULD not!...

Sesshoumaru scrambled to his feet and tore out of the room. He nearly knocked down a maid bearing an armload of fresh sheets, but he ignored her and kept going, his destination suddenly clear in his mind.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Y'know, m'lord...it vould have been a lot more conziderate and convenient for me if you had died in your humanoid form. How am I supposed to vork vith dis?" Sairex muttered, staring at Toga's absolutely massive skeleton. Toga chuckled and patted the raven on the back.

"Oh, I know you can handle it. Although next time I decide to die I'll be sure to take your needs more heavily into consideration."

"Vell, it certainly complicates tings. You're too damn big."

Miroku snickered. "I think he's just cranky, not an early bird."

Toga snorted and then burst out laughing. "Indeed!"

Sairex scowled. "Har, har...very funny...mock da bird just cause I'm not used to vaking up early because I lived in a vorld vhere it vas almost ALVAYS dark..."

"I enjoy mocking birds." Miroku bit his lip hard, trying not to laugh. Toga made no such effort and simply roared. Sairex rolled his eyes.

"Oye...dat vas...lame. Even for you. Now ztop vith da abuse and help me." Sairex thrust a bowl full of brightly colored but incredibly foul smelling powder into Miroku's hands.

Miroku poked at it hesitantly and wrinkled his nose. "What is this for?"

"Vatch." Sairex hopped nimbly over to one of the nearest bones, his wings spreading slightly for balance. He dipped his claw into a similar bowl of powder and drew a simple half-moon shape on the bone. "See dis? Have to draw it on all da bones, include dem in da spell. I'll...get da more difficult ones."

"Interesting." Toga blinked as the raven thrust a bowl in his hands too. "I'm no monk.."

"Dey be your bones, you're zolid enough, you can help. Dis vould have taken only a couple minutes if you had da decency to be a normal zize..." Sairex winked and took off, half-leaping and half-flying further up the mound.

It took a long while - and a couple fresh batches of powder - but eventually they had everything marked to Sairex's satisfaction. The raven squatted down and rummaged in the pack he had brought, fishing out several heavy vials. He then began stripping. Miroku blinked and stared. "Much as I like the show...er..."

"I have a loincloth, no need to get jealous. Bezides, dogs really aren't my ztyle..."

Toga smirked. "Ah, but you've never had one such as I."

"And hopefully he never will, no offense," Miroku said with a grin. Toga chuckled and nodded.

"No worries, monk."

Miroku blinked as he took a good look at what Sairex was doing. He had a bowlful of what looked like..."Is that blood?"

"Yes. Zome of Inuyazha's, zome of Zezzhoumaru's. Best I could do, considering da big guy here has none. But dat's ok, I know a trick." So saying, he pulled out another couple vials, squinting at the contents before discarding them, finally lighting up when he found the one he sought. "Here ve go..." He poured the dark green, crystalline powder in his hand. Murmuring softly he cast it into the bowl of blood.

There was a bright flash of viridian smoke, and Sairex crowed in triumph. The blood in the bowl was now hovering in three separate segments - one large and two smaller, although nothing visible was holding it apart. Carefully, the raven deposited each third into individual bowls. The two smaller bowls he carefully bottled and stored away. The rest he left with a grin. "Dis here, purely your blood, m'lord."

"You're just full of tricks, aren't you." Toga's gaze slid to the raven's pack. "And then the rest...?"

"Your mates. I vill zave it for you, in case it is...necessary at zome point. You never can tell."

Toga's eyes lingered for a long moment before he turned away. "Indeed."

"I have blood and bone. I can draw flesh from dese, but you vill be veak and need to rest for a few veeks, and vork out and eat a good deal to regain your full ztrength."

"A minor inconvenience compared to being dead. Sairex, you are a genius."

"Mrr...no...just remember a lot of old magic better left forgotten, in most cases...dere vere good reasons dat my clan vas killed."

"Your people were killed?...I'm so sorry..." Miroku frowned. Sairex shrugged slightly.

"I vouldn't be...dey vere largely necromancers and almost exclusively evil. I know many vays to raise da dead and bind dem, I know vays to zteal zouls, possess people...I know many vicked tings from dem. If I hadn't left, maybe I vould have ended up like da rest of dem. At least now I have da chance to do zometing good."

Miroku nodded. "Right. So..er...is there any way I can help you?"

Sairex looked up from where he was busily drawing intricate figures on his skin with Toga's blood. "Mmm...you vill soon. I vill be taking your energy for dis...you vill be veak."

"That's fine, I trust you."

"I know. Take Tenzeiga and hold it. No matter vhat happens, try to ztay in contact vith da sword. As if you vere becoming one vith it. Can you do dat?"

"Sure. I brought him here, didn't I?"

Toga chuckled, and Sairex nodded. Miroku picked up Tenseiga and then sat down comfortably, resting the blade across his lap. Sairex finally decided he had done enough drawing. He took the bowl with the remaining blood and bounced up, upending it over the top of Toga's skull. He then flew back down, chanting softly and drawing intricate symbols in the air. As each was completed, it flared into visibility, a startling bright, purple shock before vanishing.

Miroku felt a tremendous pull on his energy, as if someone had suddenly pulled the plug and it was going down the drain. He concentrated hard on the warmth of Tenseiga's energy, although he almost lost it when he felt its energy flare too.

Sairex continued to draw and he traced runes. He finally pulled them all together and gave Toga one long look. Toga nodded, and Sairex traced one final symbol. There was a loud shattering noise and a blinding purple-gold flash. When the light vanished and Miroku could see again, he saw that Toga was gone, but nothing else appeared to have happened.

"Did...did it not work?"

"Vatch..." Sairex murmured softly as he sank down to the ground to sit, exhaustion evident in his eyes. Miroku leaned against him, feeling equally drained. The ground began to rumble, and Sairex's grin widened triumphantly.

Slowly, as if being moved by some giant hand, the bones of the Inu no Taisho began to drag themselves together. They lashed together as tendons and joints began to grow. The skeleton rose slowly to its feet as it neared completion, lifting its head. Brilliant golden sparks exploded into its eyes. Slowly the skeletal beast clacked its jaw, testing it. Even as the two onlookers watched, flesh began to grow out of the bones in thick ribbons, twisting with veins and sinew. The whole process was very grisly to watch, but morbidly fascinating at the same time.

The skin came next, and then the surface seemed to slither as tufts of silver white hair burst free of the surface. Toga threw back his head with a gleeful howl as his rebirth was completed. He was far too skinny and was exhausted, but he was ALIVE!

Slowly the beast shrank back to his humanoid form, smiling warmly at Sairex and Miroku. He seemed much more solid than he had when he was a ghost - understandably so - even if he had a lot of weight and muscle mass to put back on to retain his former glory. "Ah, Sairex and Miroku, thank you..."

"Nn...you owe me. I'll be recovering for veeks and I used up zome tings I don't tink I can replace. I couldn't have done it vithout Tenzeiga. I basically modified vhat it usually does and added to it vith my knowledge of necromancy and vhatnot..."

"I owe you. Now I wish to go home...it will be good to actually feel the wind in my face and the grass beneath my feet...and shortly thereafter, a bed beneath my back."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The exhausted but triumphant trio returned back to the western castle. Miroku and Sairex stumbled off together to take a very long nap. Toga, though tired, was enjoying stretching his limbs too much - indeed, simply having them was wonderful again!

He peered into Sesshoumaru's room when his knock received no answer and saw that his son was already up and out of the room. His bed was made pristinely and the room was in perfect order - as always. Toga smirked a bit and paused, wondering where his eldest pup had gone.

// If not in his room, he must be either reading in the library, working in the study, or practicing swordplay. I doubt that he's changed his habits THAT much. // When the library proved empty, Toga made his way into the study.

Something was wrong. He knew it the moment he entered. Scrolls and documents had been ripped open haphazardly and strewn everywhere. He snatched up a handful and his eyes widened in shock as he scanned through them briefly. "A shame to my house...! Oh, DAMN it...!"

With an angry growl he pitched down the parchment and tore out of the room, finding strength in the sudden surge of adrenaline. Any servant that he passed he snagged roughly, demanding they tell him where Sesshoumaru was or if they had seen him. Most of them knew nothing, but one timid and somewhat terrified maid said she had seen him headed for the private springs.

Toga cursed lividly every step of the way. Servants and guards alike scrambled to get out of his way. After what seemed like far too long he burst out the side door and down the path through the gardens that led to the private springs. They were a small ways from the castle, a short ways from the wall and hidden by lush vegetation. Toga burst into the clearing, his lungs heaving. He had a stray thought that such a minor thing shouldn't have ever tired him out in the slightest, but it was promptly forgotten as his heart skipped a beat and his blood froze in his veins.

The spring was eerily still and serene. Had it been a windy day, he may not have been able to see much in water. However, it was sunny, and the water was as still and smooth as glass. His view was unhindered enough to catch a muted flash of silver below the surface.

Without a second thought Toga bounded into the spring and dove under. Drifting lightly against the smooth stony bed of the spring lay Sesshoumaru, his hair floating around him gently. The weight of his drenched clothing and mokomoko had been enough to hold him under.

With a defiant growl that would have been a roar if it hadn't threatened to earn him a double lungful of water, Toga grabbed his son and hauled him free of the spring. Sesshoumaru's lips were blue and he wasn't breathing. Toga felt for a heartbeat frantically and found nothing.

"NO, DAMN IT!" With a roar that shook the very ground, he hammered his fist on Sesshoumaru's chest. The younger taiyoukai's body jolted and he abruptly spluttered, his lungs expelling some of the water he had swallowed. Tears of relief stung Toga's eyes as he rolled Sesshoumaru to his side to make it easier for him to get the water out.

// They will pay. They will all pay. No one will ever consider a pup of mine a disgrace without due cause. Especially not my Sesshoumaru. How DARE they bring him to THIS... //

Thoughts of angry vengeance and violence dominated his mind, along with relief and a deep and fierce love for his puppy. Toga wearily scooped up his soaked and bedraggled pup, carrying him back to the castle. He spoke to no one, merely staggered his way into his chambers. He noted idly that they were precisely how he had left them, although Sesshoumaru's scent was present.

// He has been in my chambers since my death...fairly often, it would seem. Oh, my dear Sesshoumaru...//

Mindless of the fact they were both soaked, he set Sesshoumaru on his bed and then curled him into his arms, falling into an exhausted sleep almost instantly.


	37. Chapter 36

Pride (In the Name of Love) 36 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Thank you to all my loverly reviewers, as always. And yes, there is a new evil afoot, secrets hinted at, and all sorts of good junk. Keep in mind - if there is no bad guy, there's not much of a plot, and the story would get old. o.O

And I want to say that the story has a life of its own - a few things have been and are going in directions I never intended nor planned in any way...

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"He yet lives, my lord," the minion whispered, cringing before his dark master. The cold black eyes glared mercilessly at him from under the thick hood, but he was not struck dead.

"Surprising. I had assumed his mental state less stable. No matter. We can take him alive."

The minion licked his lips nervously. "But...master, Tsetsukosei..."

"Tsetsukosei was a fool! Granted, a powerful fool...and I envy the magic he had. I intend to learn it myself. Imagine what he could have been if so much of his power was not devoted to sustaining his half-life."

"How will you learn, Master?" the minion asked, cringing. At the dark glare he received, he clarified his question hastily. "Sairexannaras was very thorough in his destruction. He left nothing."

"Hn. He knows far too much to be allowed to live and yet is far too valuable to kill. I don't even know if he can be killed...who knows what secrets he took from his clan? No matter. You will observe the castle for now and report to me any changes. If that damnable wretch survives, we will have to take him alive. No matter what happens, do NOT let that bloody bird catch wind of you. I will cut ties with you and you will be at his mercies. And you were just informing me of exactly how merciful he was."

The minion shuddered and bowed, scraping his belly on the floor. "Yes, Master...I understand, master...I will observe and report." The dark creature turned and scurried away, leaving his brooding master to his thoughts."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru slowly drifted a step closer to waking. He was so warm and content that he didn't really wish to come back to consciousness just yet. He felt so...safe and comfortable. The soothing scent of his father, the one being he trusted always to protect him, seemed to surround him. He had a fuzzy thought on how strange that was - even on those nights where he had slipped into his father's room and curled up in the midst of the massive bed, well...his father's scent had faded so many years after his death.

With a tiny murmur of protest against waking, he attempted to bury himself further into the warmth beside him and around him. Again, something didn't seem quite right. Yes, the massive bed was soft and warm, a veritable mountain of silks and furs and thick and elaborate quilted blankets ...more pillows than any ten people could find use for...but he couldn't remember it ever wrapping around him so warmly and comfortingly.

// Wrapped...around me...? // Sesshoumaru thought and slowly cracked open one eye. The room was dark, the heavy drapes allowing almost no light into the chamber no matter what time of day it was. However, the pale, dark gray light was more than enough for Sesshoumaru's excellent vision to sift through. The first thing he noticed was the fact that he wasn't alone. The second was that the warmth was not a blanket, but rather his father's mokomoko.

His father!

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened as shock hit him. His living, breathing, very much ALIVE - if sleeping - father! He attempted to pull back out of his father's tight embrace and blinked as the arms around him tightened in an effort to hold him closer, a soft but deep and rumbling growl of protest coming from his father's chest.

Reality hit him like a sledgehammer to the face. He abruptly recalled the events of the morning, remembered with perfect clarity the damning missives piled high on the desk. A low, keening whine came from his throat and he made a much more concerted effort to escape his father's grasp. He had to get away before his father woke up! All he had to do was slip free of his father's arms, gently untangle the mokomokos and he'd be gone...

That proved to be a far more difficult plan to execute than it had originally seemed, and Sesshoumaru froze in place when he saw Toga's sleepy golden eyes flicker open. Said eyes opened wider and a frown settled across the elder inu's face as he noted Sesshoumaru's distress. "Do not look so, my Sesshoumaru..."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and bit his lip hard enough to draw blood. He knew he had to admit his shame, had to admit to his father before his father found out anyways. "M-my Lord Father, I...oh, I am so sorry..." he finally managed to choke out. He heard a slight growl from his father but was not expecting to suddenly be clutched up in a tight embrace.

Toga held his pup tightly, lightly running his claws through the silvery hair. "My Sesshoumaru, I saw the letters when I came home this morning. Pay them no mind. You and I both know that someone lied, and I WILL find out who. This matter will be dealt with. You have never done a thing to shame me or my House, quite the opposite. I am so very, very proud of you. I always have been."

A stormcloud of conflicting emotions drifted through Sesshoumaru's eyes, but oh, he was relieved. "I...I will...try to restore my honor and do better by you."

Toga scowled. "Oh, my Sesshoumaru...I do not care what the other demons say. They are a fickle lot, almost all of them. If today I were to send them out a letter that directly contradicts the entire lie that was told them, the majority of them would smoothly apologize and jump on the new bandwagon without question. They respect my House and they fear it. It is easy for them to insult you because they think you gone from the picture, but very few are the youkai that would dare insult you to your face."

Sesshoumaru knew well the fickle nature his father spoke of and so he nodded slightly. Toga looked thoughtful for a while before speaking again.

"I will need rest to recover my strength, but I am alive, as I'm sure you've noticed."

"Yes, my Lord Father...your scent is restored and your body is warm."

Toga smiled. "Indeed...and my bedchamber smells strongly like my eldest puppy, is there a reason for that?" He arched an eyebrow, his tone lightly teasing. Sesshoumaru blinked in surprise and then ducked his gaze, his cheeks pinking. Oh, he was growing to hate the emotional instability that was making it so hard to keep his expression blank and making him susceptible to blushing and whatnot!

"I would...come in here to sleep at nights when it came with difficulty. It helped...comfort me," he finally admitted.

Toga's smile grew wider and more affectionate, though sadder too. "Ah, my precious Sesshoumaru...I am so sorry for all you have gone through."

"It is of no con--" Sesshoumaru blinked when a pair of fingers touched his lips, cutting him off.

"Hush. Everything you do and ever have done and ever will do is my direct concern. You are my son, and I love you. I was admittedly rash and a bit foolish on the night of my death. I was not thinking clearly and paid for it with my life. I died and all my burdens were thrust upon you. You have done so well...never has there been a youkai lord near as young as you that has ruled such a kingdom. But you never should have had to, not at your age. You were still a pup. In my opinion you still are...no, don't get all bristly, my dear. Should I live to be twice my age and you are the age I am now, you'll always be my puppy. The point is, my death caused you much pain and so much trouble. Even your recent troubles are related to my own time as Lord, and for that I can never forgive myself."

Sesshoumaru blinked. "My Lord Father..."

Toga smiled slightly and brushed a few stray strands of hair from Sesshoumaru's face. "You have done so much more than you should have had to in your life and succeeded when everyone waited for you to fail. My heart bursts with pride for you, my precious Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru sniffled, then had a moment to be horrified at the action, before simply giving in and burying his face against his father's chest. His voice was somewhat muffled but understandable. "Will you...now that you are alive again...be reclaiming your throne?"

Toga sighed inwardly, not wanting to disturb the warm and fuzzy embrace, but he needed to look at his son when he said this. After he had Sesshoumaru's gaze locked with his own, he continued. "If you wish the throne, my Sesshoumaru, it is yours and I readily submit to you. You have held it for a long while and it would be unfair for me to expect to just reclaim it due to my unexpected return."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in shock and incredulity at the sheer absurdity of his Lord Father submitting to him. The taiyoukai never willingly submitted to another individual save his sire - for some reason, it was warm and comforting to admit his father's dominance and superiority. The simple thought of his father being anything but his alpha was almost disturbing. "I...I could never rule over you, my Lord Father...I could rule in your abcense, but never in your place. Even if I have tended affairs, these lands are yours. I am not...in charge of affairs right now regardless."

Toga smiled. "Ah, yes, your brother. He has done well, but his time as leader grows short." At Sesshoumaru's questioning look, Toga continued. "You see, he obtained the rule of these lands under uncertain, questionable circumstances. The other demon lords feared or respected you for a variety of reasons, the basest of which being the simple fact that you could defeat them readily. However, there was doubt as to how Inuyasha received the throne. It was possible something had happened to you, but it was equally possible that he perhaps defeated you and claimed it. Therefore, the stronger and wiser demon lords sat back to observe. The rasher fools tested his strength by attacking. Their defeat confirmed that your brother was indeed strong, and did not lessen the mysteriousness of his ascension. The older lords are careful. Eventually, they would have moved against your brother. Now that someone has spread this pack of lies, their doubts will be removed and their plans sped up. So your brother's rule is to be short from this point. He is strong, but some of them are stronger. If you do not wish to rule, I will reclaim my throne when I am strong enough to defend it...but it would please me if you would stay by my side and grant me your council. I would value it highly."

Sesshoumaru had been nodding his agreement at his father's logic and reasoning, but he stopped cold at the last. The thought that his father valued and desired his council sent a warm and fuzzy rush through him, and he felt a faint smile twitching his lips despite himself. "I would be honored, my Lord Father."

"Very good." Toga grinned heartily at seeing the tiny ghost of a smile flit across his son's face. It wasn't much, but it was a start. "There is none I would rather have at my side to assist me with this. You've proven your worth a thousand times over."

"My brother has done an admirable job as well, given the circumstances..."

"This is true, however..." Toga looked vaguely guilty for a moment, and Sesshoumaru had to do a double take to see if the expression remained on his father's face. It was wholly unfamiliar and unexpected. Toga's voice lowered as if speaking a deep secret. "I do love your brother, he is my son. I am proud of what he has done, and will be honored to get to know him...but Sesshoumaru, that does not change the fact that you...you are special to me. You are not my only, but you were my first. As such, you are very precious to me and I love you terribly."

Sesshoumaru couldn't help but smile, aware that his cheeks had flushed a bit but he couldn't bring himself to care. Being thought of so very highly and being held so dearly by this being that had been almost a god-figure to him all his life, the epitome of all he desired to ever be...it felt wonderful. "Oh, my Lord Father... I am...so very glad you are returned."

Toga paused to consider that as he held Sesshoumaru's gaze, still lightly threading his claws through his son's hair. Boldly declaring his emotions or even admitting he had them was something Sesshoumaru was not prone to.

A sudden rush of intense, fierce love gripped the elder taiyoukai. All he had said, he had meant. Sesshoumaru had gone through so much, and done so many amazing things at his age...he was fiercely proud of his eldest son, and he loved him deeply. And right now, his golden eyes were heavy with hurts and fears, but complete trust that Toga would protect him and make it all right. Such loyalty, such love and devotion from such a proud and beautiful, admirable creature...

Toga wasn't even aware that he had moved until he heard Sesshoumaru's tiny, startled gasp as their lips met. Toga was almost if not more surprised than Sesshoumaru. He was absolutely shocked at his own behavior. This was his SON, his puppy! And he was so damaged right now, so fragile despite all his strength..and so gods-be-damned beautiful and trusting and...mm, delicious, too...

Sesshoumaru's eyes could not possibly have grown any larger. He froze in shock when Toga's lips brushed against his own, and he sensed the wave of tense surprise that had shot through his father. Toga pulled free, his eyes locking with Sesshoumaru's. His gaze was intense and searching.

Toga could see plainly the stunned look on his son's face, easily feel his heart fluttering in his chest like a crazed, wounded bird. A slow, warm smile spread across his lips. He had never, until a moment ago that was, looked at how terribly attractive his son was. Every quality he found to be desirable in a potential mate, Sesshoumaru possessed in abundance. // He is my puppy...I cannot possibly be thinking along these lines. Dear gods, what am I DOING?! This must stop immediately. This absolutely can NOT continue! //

Apparently, Toga's mind and his body were not exactly on speaking terms at the moment. Sesshoumaru felt his eyes flutter closed as his lips were claimed in a very warm, thorough kiss. He felt the arms that had been holding him shift and then tighten, pulling him in tighter against Toga's warm, powerful frame. A sudden wave of heat spiked through Sesshoumaru as Toga's teeth nipped lightly at his lower lip, his tongue then moving to lick at the injury in apology before idly slipping into his mouth to continue its explorations.

Sesshoumaru was dimly aware of how amazing a kisser his father was, although he figured he shouldn't be. His father was amazing at everything he did, why should this be an exception? With a soft noise, his mind shut down and he slowly snaked his arms around the elder inu's neck, feeling vaguely sure he must be melting. Toga had shifted and, rather than feeling trapped, the weight over him was comforting even if it dizzied all his senses. Desire suddenly surged through him as Toga's hands ran down his sides, pulling a small and breathless moan from him.

He wasn't the only one that was suddenly overwhelmed with a heady sense of arousal. Toga broke the kiss when it threatened to kill the both of them from lack of air, and it took all his self control to force himself to calm down a few notches. One look at Sesshoumaru...his golden eyes hooded, his lips kiss-swollen and his cheeks flushed, panting a bit...oh, he almost flew apart at the sight. // Oh, fuck, what am I doing... //

It was only with an extreme amount of effort that he withdrew and sat up before taking to his feet. Sesshoumaru shook himself free of his daze, instantly flushing, and Toga smiled at him and offered his hand. "We should get something to eat and check in with your brother."

Sesshoumaru swallowed thickly but nodded, accepting the hand and standing himself. For a long instant, their eyes locked again, but both understood that this was not something they would speak of. Not yet.


	38. Chapter 37

Pride (In the Name of Love) 37 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Again, thank you to my reviewers.

No one seems to have seen the Toga / Sesshy thing coming...well, neither did I. Seriously, this story writes itself and I just hang on. I'm not tryin' to scare anyone away or squick anyone, either...(though I'm as yet unsure why inucest is okay with some inus and not others? hehe)...but the story will go where it will. Anyone that knows my writing from my olden days will know I've never been a fan of the common pairing and I try to forge ahead into less explored territory...it's just how I am. I almost never feature any series' main character as my own main character, nor do I often cater to the common pairing audience. I delight in either opening people's eyes to new possibilities or taking unexpected twists. I just can't be part of the crowd.

Now, I also want to point out to all you die-hard Inuyasha fans out there...I've not forgotten him, I'm not trying to ignore him, and I've never said that he won't end up more seriously with Sesshy. However...he won't feature in every chapter cause the story, big as it's becoming, is still Sesshoumaru-centric. Inuyasha is a support character and thus will be in and out as I deem necessary. Sesshy's my baby, Sesshy's the star, and as such the things that involve him will be more focused on. I'm not trying to make it seem like poor Inuyasha is getting the short end of the stick and forgotten, it's not the case...its just...he's been more in the background is all because he hasn't really...had a lot of things to do lately that would affect the plotline in any significant fashion.

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Dinner was a pleasant affair, in general. Inuyasha was thrilled to be able to chat with his father in the flesh - for some reason it was more meaningful than chatting to his ghost. Toga was more than happy to chat back, and happier still to have something to focus on so he wouldn't have to think too much right now. He was still shocked at his own behavior and really didn't know how to deal with it. He couldn't ignore it forever, no...but he COULD let it lie for now and not look at it and pretend like it didn't exist.

"Inuyasha, your brother and I..." Toga cleared his throat. "Ahem, your brother and I have had a discussion of late. What would be your opinion on myself retaking the throne?"

"That you can't do it soon enough. I'm so not cut out for this."

Toga grinned. "You've done well, though. If you wish it, I would be pleased to have you continue to run border patrols. You seem to like them and it'd be a great help to me."

Inuyasha grinned wider - he DID enjoy traveling the land's boundaries and keeping it clear of renegade demons. He always felt as if he was accomplishing something. "That'd be great!"

Sesshoumaru was silent and incredibly fascinated by his food, trying very hard to NOT look in his father's direction during his discussion with Inuyasha. After a time, much to everyone's surprise, he actually began a hesitant conversation with Miroku.

"You have done surprisingly well tending to political matters. I was reviewing some of the documents you completed."

Miroku blinked. A compliment, from Sesshoumaru? Surely the world was ending. "Well, thank you. I haven't really had much experience officially, but I've done plenty of unofficial diplomatic work, meeting with village chiefs and whatnot over the years. It wasn't too much of a stretch to take what I knew and modify it."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "You have done well, and you have the thanks of this Sesshoumaru."

Sairex grinned and then leaned in, propping his chin up on his hands. "Vell, dis places me in an awkward position."

"How so?" Sesshoumaru asked.

"Vell...I svore my fealty to da zons of da Inu no Taizho." Here he cast a glance at Toga. "Rather didn't expect da...er... complication."

"You always were so very flattering, Sairex," Toga responded flatly, causing the raven to snicker.

"Your vow of course extends to my Lord Father, and if it does not, it should."

"Of course. Loyal to da House, den." Sairex nodded.

Toga thought for a moment then flashed Inuyasha a conspiratorial grin. "Now that I am less, ah...how did you put it...'ghosty'...you and I have a trip to make."

Inuyasha blinked, then nodded. "Yeah, I suppose so." He glanced sidelong at Sesshoumaru. Toga followed his gaze and honestly wondered if it would be alright to leave his pup alone for a day. He still didn't trust him, especially after this morning. Sairex's sharp gaze picked up on Toga's brief but carefully veiled look of worry and the raven came to the rescue.

"Lord Zezzhoumaru, it occurs to me dat I've been here a vhile, but I have not yet had a proper tour of da castle grounds, nor have we discussed vhat my duties zhould be. I vas hoping tomorrow perhaps I could have you zhow me around?"

Sesshoumaru blinked and then nodded. "Yes, I can do that. It will take a good deal of time, however. The grounds are extensive."

Toga shot Sairex a silent look of thanks before nodding to Inuyasha. "We leave in the morning, then."

The rest of the evening passed fairly uneventfully. Eventually, good nights were said and everyone began drifting off to their respective chambers. Toga twitched inwardly, regretting having swept his issues to the side, but he was not about to let them interfere. "My Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru paused - he had been heading for the door to go to his bed. He was inordinately tired, despite having slept half the day. He arched an eyebrow. "Yes, my Lord Father?"

"I would have you stay with me in my chambers, if you have no objections."

Sesshoumaru's mouth opened and then shut again, a dozen responses and twice as many questions coming to mind but none forming properly. He finally simply nodded in response and followed Toga to his room.

Toga busied himself dressing in a pair of loose sleeping pants before pulling his hair free of it's ponytail and beginning to brush it out. He cringed a bit at the snarls - he NEVER should have went to bed with it wet earlier. Sesshoumaru had discovered the same problem and was likewise moving to correct it.

Eventually, however, both of them considered themselves properly groomed for sleeping. Sesshoumaru crawled into the bed and couldn't help a grin. He DID love it. The bed was huge and square, the mattress incredibly thick and heavenly soft. The mounds of furs, silks and pillows only added to its almost sinful comfort. His own bed was extravagant but not quite like this.

Toga chuckled as he settled himself in comfortably. "I always had a hard time keeping you out of here when you were a puppy. It seems you still see the allure."

"Hn. I desire comfort as much as any creature, and it seems an inordinate amount of the comfort alloted to this castle has been gathered into this spot."

Toga smiled and then leaned forward, brushing his lips to the crescent mark on Sesshoumaru's forehead before pulling his pup into his arms. "Goodnight, my Sesshoumaru."

The younger taiyoukai was glad the embrace hid his blush. "Goodnight."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Morning came and Sesshoumaru's eyes opened as the first feeble rays of dawn attempted and failed to penetrate the thick draperies on the window. A lazy smile graced his lips - he hated the bright morning sunshine that always found a way to shine in his eyes in his own room.

He yawned and then blinked, realizing with a belated start that he wasn't in his own room. Toga's eyes slid open when he felt Sesshoumaru stir and he yawned himself. "Good morning...I trust you slept well?"

"Your bed will make this Sesshoumaru lazy."

Toga grinned. "Well, it is rather good at inducing such thoughts." // And other thoughts...// Toga released Sesshoumaru and sat up, savagely beating down the sudden images springing to his mind of the LAST time he woke up like this, in this position.

Sesshoumaru may have been thinking along the same lines because he abruptly sat up and clambered to his feet as fast as was seemly, fumbling for his brush. "I must return to my chambers and prepare myself. I have to give m...our advisor a proper tour of the grounds and must be presentable to do so."

"Very well. I should be back by this evening. Will you join me for dinner?"

"Of course, my Lord Father." Sesshoumaru nodded and made his exit.

Toga smiled as he got himself ready. He was unsurprised to find his clothing all still hanging perfectly in his closet, exactly how he had always liked it. Every tiny detail had been preserved as if he had never left.

It wasn't long before he met up with Inuyasha. The hanyou had a small pack on his shoulder. Tetsusaiga was mysteriously absent. "Er...you really should leave the armor and the weapons and such here. It'll save some time."

Toga's eyebrow shot up. "Why would I travel unarmed and unarmored?"

"It's a really long story and I'll explain on the way. Please, trust me...?"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kagome blinked sleepily at the knock on her door. With a start, she hopped to her feet. She hadn't intended to doze off in her chair!

She was pleasantly surprised when she found none other than Inuyasha on the other side of the portal. "Inuyasha! I didn't expect you back so soon!"

Inuyasha edged his way into the room and took her by the shoulders. "Kagome, I brought someone for you to meet. You are NOT going to believe me, either, when I tell you who. It's a long and confusing story."

"You brought your brother here, how could this possibly be any more confusing?"

Toga strode into the room a moment later, glancing around warily. The sights, scents, and sounds of this world were wreaking havoc on his senses and he felt far jumpier than he liked. Kagome stared at him in surprise.

"Inuyasha, he looks just like you! Well, not exactly, but..."

Toga smiled and took her hand, kissing it and giving her a smile. "You must be Kagome. Inuyasha speaks very highly of you."

"Kagome, this is the Inu no Taisho...my father."

Kagome blinked, then stared. "B...but....how?"

"It is a long and confusing story, but your monk friend and his lover found a way to use Tenseiga's power and resurrect me, in effect."

"I s-- Miroku has a lover?" Kagome's gaze shot to Inuyasha.

Inuyasha grinned. "Aw, yeah. You'd like him, too."

"Him? Miroku, the will-you-bear-my-child Miroku, is with a HIM?" Kagome didn't have a problem with the concept of a same sex relationship - it was more simple shock that Miroku, the womanizer, would end up in one.

"Heh, yeah...anyway, my father needs to talk to Rin. That's the real reason we're here."

As if on cue, Rin came around the corner, rubbing her eyes sleepily. The two girls had been up late watching movies the night before. "Kagome, Rin is..." She blinked and beamed at Inuyasha, then her gaze swiveled to Toga and she stared, unsure of what to make of him.

Toga walked over to her and examined her critically. "You must be the girl that has so captivated my Sesshoumaru."

"Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin perked up at the name.

"I am his father. I came to meet you."

Rin's confusion melted and she flashed Toga her sunniest smile. "Oh! Rin is happy to meet you too, my Lord!"

Toga blinked and then smiled in return - he couldn't help it, it was automatic. The girl's beaming was infectious. How such a bright, happy human ended up in his son's care was a mystery he hoped to solve soon.

"Is this your first time through the well, my Lord?"

Toga nodded. "Yes, Rin."

Inuyasha grinned and leaned back against the wall next to Kagome - he could see Rin was dominating Toga's affections already. It was amusing to see how quickly the girl could wrap some of the most powerful youkai in all the world around her finger - hell, he'd do anything for her too and he knew it.

"Rin has something to show you then!" Beaming, she led the way to the kitchen. "Sesshoumaru-sama really liked this..." Her voice was muffled as she dug into the strange, cold white box in front of her and presented a carton and a metal utensil of some sort to Toga with a flourish.

Inuyasha's ears drooped at his father's surprised and pleased exclamation as he discovered the joy of 'iced cream'. "Dammit..."

Kagome chuckled and patted her friend on the shoulder. "Don't worry. I bought extra."


	39. Chapter 38

Pride (In the Name of Love) 38 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Over 100 reviews on AFF, over a hundred on ... wow, I feel special. Didn't think my first ever IY fic would get much response. Up to 160 pages in size 10 font in my...er..well, MS Word clone. I'm too poor to buy the real thing. But Abiword does me just fine and opens my doc files, so I'm good with it.

Depending on whether or not I decide to start my web serial original story or not, the updates on this MIGHT get slowed down a little. We'll see. For now, all systems are go, normal daily updates.

I need to find a talented artist...get me a piccy of Sairex done up. ^^ And then maybe commission some for my original series, should it come to pass that I elect to post it thus instead of waiting to publish it in normal book form. Im still trying to convince myself my writing is good enough to make the effort. ^^ Anywho, enough about me. That's not why you're here!

On a side note...this chapter got a little out of hand but I had fun with it. I'm such a hentai. *sigh*

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"You are sure? The Inu no Taisho, alive and well? How can this be?"

"I am sure, Master. Apparently, the Deathraven performed some ritual and brought him back to life."

"Sairexannaras grows more dangerous with every day that passes, and there is not a damn thing any of us can do about it. Curse the wretched fiend!" the cloaked figure hissed. He reached into a pouch and pulled out a small object, tossing it to his minion. "Use this. We will not be able to hide all signs of our activity from the damn raven and we cannot take him down...but perhaps we can conceal our identity at the least. That should at least temporarily remove him from the picture."

The minion looked at the small object in his hand and nodded, swallowing thickly.

"Remember...if you fail, I will not intervene to save you from him. Now get out of my sight, you wretch!"

The minion scurried off to obey his dark, angry lord.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The tour of the palace grounds did take quite a while. Sesshoumaru got distracted and lost in pointing out various features and relaying the history of several areas - in fact, he almost seemed to be enjoying himself. Miroku gave Sairex a knowing smile - he could have given the raven a tour himself, of course, but he understood entirely what the crafty bird had done. Besides, it was nice, taking the leisurely stroll - and enlightening. Sesshoumaru was quite interesting to listen to, especially when he warmed to a topic.

The trio eventually was headed back across the main courtyard towards the opposite wing of the castle when a tiny flare of demonic energy halted them in their tracks. Sesshoumaru immediately drew Toukijin, Miroku clutched his staff and Sairex took a few steps back, flexing his talons warily.

The energy signal was still there, but very faint. Sesshoumaru scowled and sniffed the air, but he smelled nothing. A small glint in the grass caught his eye and he stepped forward, prodding it with the tip of his sword. "This is the source of the energy..." he stated.

The object in question looked to be a small glass-like orb, filled with some sort of purplish liquid. Dozens of long and slender silvery needles jutted out of its surface. Sesshoumaru examined it cautiously, picking it up and balancing it on the flat of his blade. He didn't want to risk touching the sharp little spines.

Miroku frowned. "It must just be residual energy from whatever demon possessed it last. Its obviously not alive and couldn't make it's own energy."

"But vhat is it?" Sairex asked with a frown. Sesshoumaru dropped it to the ground and blinked when the impact forced the needles into the orb and the thing rolled a few feet away across the flagstones of the courtyard. After another few moments passed and nothing happened, Sesshoumaru bent down and picked it up carefully. A small crack ran down one side.

"I think I broke it." Sesshoumaru shrugged. "It must belong to one of the palace staff."

Miroku hesitantly took the orb from the taiyoukai and turned it over. "Huh. Are we getting a little too paranoid that some little trinket is throwing us off this much?" The monk chuckled. "Yeah, you broke it. It's cracked."

Sairex plucked the thing up from Miroku and examined it himself. All three of them jumped back when the orb suddenly floated out of the raven's hand and hovered at roughly eye-level. "Hm. Perhaps it's not broken after all...but I ztill don't know vhat it is...and I'm not zure I like it."

As the raven took a step to the side, the orb drifted after him. Sairex blinked and then took a step back. Again, he was followed.

The trio glanced at one another, then back at the mysterious little globe. Sairex squinted and peered closer. He shrugged helplessly and was about to admit he had no idea what it was or what to do with it when the orb suddenly darted in close to him and exploded. Sairex screamed horribly as the needles - now filled with the strange purple substance, drove into his face, his throat...several piercing his eyes. He fell heavily to the ground, barely restraining from the overwhelming urge to claw at the injury desperately.

Miroku yelled in horror and dropped to his knees next to the raven, his expression frantic as he tried to figure out what he should do to help. Sesshoumaru had no such moment of hesitation - he immediately ran to locate the castle's healer.

"Sairex! Oh, dear god, just...just hang on, Sesshoumaru will get the healer...Oh god..."

The raven made a slight choking noise, his body convulsing. Several of the hollow needles were slowly oozing out the remainder of the strongly aromatic purple liquid. Miroku wanted to yank them out but didn't know if it would do more harm than good - especially when it came to the spines lodged in Sairex's eyes. He had never felt so useless in all his life, and was horribly grateful when Sesshoumaru arrived with the castle healer in tow.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Ah, Lady Rin, you have pleased this old youkai immensely..." Toga purred as he sat back in his chair, giving his spoon a last lick. He had never had such a delightful treat as this 'iced cream'...he would have to see about finding a way to get it in his own time, especially if both of his sons shared the same enjoyment of it as he did.

Rin beamed adoringly at him. As soon as she had put two and two together and realized that this was the man that her Sesshoumaru-sama had so respected and admired, she immediately did the same. He was a lot like Sesshoumaru, actually...although Rin had a small guilty thought that she considered Sesshoumaru to be prettier. Toga was assuredly much more open and outgoing than his son, however, and the two of them had a grand time as Rin introduced him to technology in much the same way she had Sesshoumaru.

Inuyasha and Kagome both watched in amusement. Toga was especially pleased with the concept of a hot shower and central air. "Inuyasha, my boy, you may have to rule the West in my place. I think I have lost my heart to this building and its marvels. I do not believe I can bear to be parted with it. Give your brother my best." Rin giggled and Inuyasha just smirked.

"Yeah, yeah...I can bring you back to visit if you want., but I think Kagome might, y'know, prefer to keep her house unmolested."

"You dare stand in the path of true love? How cruel...don't you want your father to be happy?" Toga pulled such a mournful face at Inuyasha that Rin grew somewhat worried and replied in earnest.

"Rin wants you to be happy!"

Toga blinked, and then burst out laughing. He guided Rin over to the couch and sat her down before kneeling before her. "I am, my dear child. Now, I need to speak with you, and it's very important. And you must hear me out, do not grow upset before I finish saying all I need to."

Rin nodded rapidly, paying complete attention. "Yes, my Lord."

"I'm sure you know a bit, but I do not know how much you know. My Sesshoumaru was hurt very badly by a very cruel demon. Even though he was rescued, he is still hurting and afraid."

Rin's eyes widened in horror but she nodded, her voice quiet. "Rin understands..."

"Alright. Well, my Sesshoumaru cares very much about you. But he is afraid that he will hurt you. He is scared that because the demon did bad things to him, he is not worthy of you."

Rin felt tears pricking the corners of her hugely widened eyes but she bit them back. The concept of Sesshoumaru being afraid was almost more than she could bear - the thought of HIM being unworthy of HER was too ludicrous to think of.

"And because of that, my Sesshoumaru decided not to come back for you. He wished to leave you here so you could live a life among humans. He felt it would be better for you, no matter how much it hurt him to come to this decision. "

The girl struggled valiantly not to cry. To be abandoned by Sesshoumaru was the worst fate she could have ever imagined. Toga caught her chin gently in his fingers and lifted her teary gaze. "Listen to me, Rin. I am not telling you these things to hurt you, only so you will understand. I do not agree with my Sesshoumaru's decision. You are a young woman, and intelligent, and capable of deciding things for yourself. In fact, I think it would do my pup good to have you around. So I am removing the decision from him and giving it to you. Do you wish to live your life here or come back with me? If you do come back, my Sesshoumaru may be angry for a time...but not at you, even if it seems that way."

"Rin would do anything to be by Sesshoumaru-sama...I do not want to live here or anywhere else with humans! If...if you do not take me back with you, Rin will have to try to find her own way there..."

Toga blinked and then smiled. Oh, his son would be SO angry with him...but he'd simply have to get over it. Father knows best, after all. A faint smirk at the thought twitched his lips. A wrathful Sesshoumaru would be a lively one. Perhaps he could use this to his advantage, get his son's mind further off of his depression...yes, sparring would be delightful. "Then we shall bring you with us when we return, and it shall be a pleasure to have you."

Rin smiled, then launched herself at Kagome, giving her a tight hug. "I'll miss you, but I have to go home. Sesshoumaru-sama needs me."

Kagome smiled and returned her hug. "It's been great having you here, you can visit any time."

Toga moved to stand before Kagome, eyeing her for a long moment before bowing slightly. "I thank you. If my sons value you so highly, you are truly a woman worthy of respect."

Kagome grinned and blushed. "Eh, well, I know Inuyasha is a good friend but Sesshoumaru and I haven't....er....always been on the best of terms."

Toga smiled a bit. "He entrusted you with the keeping of his ward. My elder son often speaks louder through action than word."

Kagome was taken aback, but she had to admit it was true. "Well...I'm not very good at reading Sesshoumaru, I guess..."

Toga smirked. "He's stubborn. No idea where he gets it from." At this, the taiyoukai attempted to look innocent as he sauntered towards the door. Kagome and Rin both giggled. "We really should be going. The day grows late and I...do not wish to be away for longer than I must. There are things that need looking after."

Rin scurried off to go get her things. Inuyasha stared hard as she came back out of the room carrying several bags. "Kagome and I went shopping lots! There is a place called a...a..." She glanced at Kagome.

"Mall."

"A mall! They have lots of shops and sell all kinds of things, and Kagome bought me stuff because she said Sesshoumaru-sama gave her lots of money."

Toga arched an eyebrow but grinned, taking some of the bags from the struggling girl. "I am sure my Sesshoumaru will be happy to hear it. Come, let us go. And thank you, Kagome."

After saying his own goodbyes, the trio left to return to the castle of the West.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Upon their return, Toga left Rin with Inuyasha to find his son and break the news to him. He was surprised to find Sesshoumaru pacing the throne room in agitation. "What troubles you, my Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru scowled. "We suffered an attack. The raven has been blinded and likely poisoned, although it is not something our healer has experience with."

Toga frowned. "That is terrible news...wh--"

Sesshoumaru's agitated look turned into a frigid glare. "Why do you smell of my ward?"

Toga's response was cool and unaffected. "Because I went to meet her. She is waiting to see you."

"Why did you bring her here?!" Sesshoumaru demanded icily.

"Because you care for her and I feel her presence would do you some good. Besides...it was her decision to make, not yours. You can not throw her to the humans and expect her to just be happy and deal with it."

Sesshoumaru was seething. How dare ANYONE, even his father, contradict him in matters relating to his ward?! "You had no right...!" With a frustrated growl, Sesshoumaru extended his claws and lunged.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Do you really think Sesshoumaru-sama will be mad that I'm here?" Rin asked Inuyasha as he helped her carry her things to her room.

"Nah, I'm sure he's probably thanking the old man right now for saving him the trip."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga neatly dodged Sesshoumaru's dive, although he was a bit surprised by his pup's speed. // My, it HAS been a long time since last we dueled...and I'm out of practice. This could be a bit more interesting than I assumed... //

Toukijin came out a moment later as Sesshoumaru squared himself off, his stare frigid enough to drop the temperature in the room several degrees.

"If that is how you wish to play it, pup, by all means. I'll be happy to give you a lesson in remembering to respect the decisions of your elders."

"This Sesshoumaru can make his own decisions!"

"Well, I am your sire and I disagreed with you."

Sesshoumaru growled. The time for words was over. He launched himself forward, Toukijin whirling in a dizzying display of expert swordsmanship. The elder taiyoukai was impressed. Despite his obvious anger, Sesshoumaru was in complete control. However...Toga knew this particular sword routine. He had, of course, been the one to teach it to his pup all those years ago.

He met Sesshoumaru's assault with a vicious clang and launched almost immediately into a counterattack. Blade met blade in a machine-gun rattle of metal. Toga cursed inwardly - his responses were slower and he was weaker than he had originally assumed - and Sesshoumaru was far superior to their last duel. He found himself grinning with fierce pride.

For all his improvements since the last time they fought, however, Sesshoumaru only possessed a fraction of his father's experience. There were reasons besides pure strength and speed that the elder inu was so successful. With one deft flick of his wrist, he caught Toukijin with his own blade just right, tearing it from Sesshoumaru's hand and sending it to sail off into the corner of the room with a clatter.

Sesshoumaru growled and gave up none of his forward momentum. He was abruptly too close for a sword to be of any use, so Toga cast his own blade down and focused on hand-to-hand combat. Both took several minor hits and scratches, although Sesshoumaru was careful to hold his poison in check. He might be angry, but he didn't really want to hurt his father. He was just working out his frustrations...

Sesshoumaru bit back a sudden yelp as a fast strike from his father caught him across the cheek, leaving a narrow but heavily bleeding line. He stumbled back a step, panting hard as he reached up to hesitantly poke at the wound.

Toga frowned - he hadn't meant to cut the boy that deeply. "Are you alright?"

Sesshoumaru growled and made another half-hearted swipe. Toga easily caught his wrists , pinning Sesshoumaru against him. He turned his gaze to the injury and without thinking, leaned forward to lick it gently. The younger taiyoukai sucked in a shuddering breath, suddenly going still.

Toga's eyelashes fluttered at the sweet taste of blood. He could almost feel the crimson threading into his eyes as his senses began to overload. His fierce pride for this beautiful creature, the heat of battle, the taste and smell of fresh blood, the lithe and perfect body against his...

Sesshoumaru let out a breathless gasp as his back hit the wall, but the gasp was rapidly swallowed as Toga's mouth crashed against his in a hungry, almost desperate kiss. Sesshoumaru's own senses had been roused by the battle and it took so very little to twist the reason his blood was boiling... He groaned softly as his fingers caught up in thick silvery hair, savagely returning the kiss as if it were simply an extension of their previous fight.

It was about this time Inuyasha and Rin opened the door, wanting to see if they were expected just yet. They both froze, their reactions almost identical. Eyes widened and jaws slowly dropped. Numbly Inuyasha extended a hand and put it over Rin's eyes, his gaze never leaving the shocking sight before him.


	40. Chapter 39

Pride (In the Name of Love) 39 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Whole lot going on in this chapter...not sure I wrote Sairex's piece entirely as I had it planned in my mind, but...ah well. LONG night at work and I'm a sleepy Jess.

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Miroku paced back and forth, his hands twisting in the sleeves of his robes. The healer had been MARVELOUSLY unhelpful in diagnosing ANYTHING about Sairex's condition. He had no idea what the fragrant purple substance was or what it's effects would be. He had no idea if Sairex's eyes would heal or if he'd be blinded. In short, he didn't know anything Miroku couldn't obviously see for himself.

"You really zhould calm down..." Sairex's voice muttered from the bed. Miroku almost tripped over his robes in his haste to fly to the bedside and clutch the raven's hand.

"You're awake! How are you? Are you alright? The healer didn't know what that stuff was, but don't worry, I--"

Sairex chuckled and squeezed Miroku's hand. "Miroku."

Miroku blushed slightly. "Sorry, I've just...been really worried about you. Why would someone want to attack you?"

Sairex heaved a sigh and smiled bitterly, poking a bit at the bandage wrapped around his head and covering his eyes. It was decidedly uncomfortable to lay on since it was digging some of his braids into his head. "You misunderstand, Miroku. The attack vasn't to hurt me, it vas to get me out of da vay. Zomeone from da Circle is after zomeone here. Likely Lord Zezzhoumaru."

"How can you be so sure?"

Sairex gave him that self-deriding bitter smirk again. "Because, no one in da Circle vould dare come after me vhen I'm out of deir vay and no one outzide knows I exist excepting da members of dis House."

Miroku grinned a bit. "Oh. Of course. Sairex, terror of the Black Circle..."

The raven's expression was so serious it stole Miroku's humor. "Miroku, dere are...tings you do not know about me. And if you vish it, I vill tell you...but I have been afraid to. I do not vant you to...tink of me differently."

"Sairex...we all make mistakes, we all have skeletons in our closet. If you don't want to tell me, you don't have to. I...I care about you for who you are n ow, not who you were before. So just rest. We'll figure out what that purple stuff was, an--"

"I know exactly vhat it vas."

Miroku blinked. "You do? How?"

"Kaa...da zmell. I'd never forget it. Zeems I ztill have zome of da antivenin in my blood, even after all dis time."

"Why in the world would you have antivenin for this particular poison in your veins?" Miroku frowned uneasily - he wasn't sure he was going to like the answer. Something was fishy here.

"A precaution. You zee, Miroku, I know vhat it is because I vas da one dat made it. I can alzo tell you dat either da dose vas veak or my antivenin is ztill vorking, because my brain is not melted. I'm not overly hopeful of getting da antidote however...it requires a flower dat vas very rare vhen I used to live in dis vorld da first time."

"So...what all IS it doing to you?"

"I'm mindblind. Da connection vith my zpiritual magic has been zevered."

"Maybe...maybe you should tell me a bit. Like why you'd make such a nasty poison in the first place..."

Sairex nodded. "Here, zit down. I'll tell you everyting, and maybe you vill underztand. It is my hope dat you vill not despise me vhen I am done, but I vill not blame you if you do.

"My full name is Zairexannaras. I vas born as da zole heir of da Chieftain and Zhaman of my tribe. I was the five hundred and forty zeventh child born to da zhaman."

Miroku's jaw hit the floor. "Five hundred and forty seventh?! Dear Buddha, your family reunions must have been insane!"

Sairex looked somewhat pained. "No...you do not underztand. I vas da first child dat vas allowed to live. Vhile my mother carried me, my father vas injured and vas unable to have any more children. As dey had no heir, I had to be allowed to live."

"Wait...allowed to live?" A cold sense of dread sank into Miroku.

"Yes. You zee...my clan all had ztrong magic. Matings vere arranged to gain power. Da most powerful mated vith da most powerful to guarantee a powerful child. But my people vere greedy, evil...dey perfected a ritual dat allowed dem to take da energy and power of another as deir own. It vorks better vith zmall children, because deir energy is ztill undefined. Da older dey get, da more zettled their power becomes, da more...personal. It vas almost an art. Da energy of a babe vas da easiest to take, and since the child vould be destroyed in the process, it zaved time having to vorry about raising it or caring for it. As a child grows, zo does da power dey have, but it becomes more personal...da risk to take it greater. The risk is rarely vorth da gain vith an adult, and half da power vill be lost as incompatible vith da host."

"You...you're saying...your clan sacrificed their children to increase their own power?"

"Yes. Children vere a commodity, traded like currency to da highest bidder or in return for favors. Da rich vould keep harems and zlaves to produce more for dem to absorb. Da very rich could afford to have da children raised for a vhile to increase da gains. Children born to two of da Clan, however, vere valued da highest as dey vould have far higher zpiritual energy dan most.

"My parents vere da ztrongest of da clan and made zure dey stayed dat vay. I cannot zay how many tousands vere zacrificed for deir own gain. Dey even received more zacrifices as tax from da Clan...one from every family every tree years in addition to da gold.

"Dat is just one example of da zort of tings dey vould do. As heir to da chieftaincy and da next zhaman, I learned many tings. I vas very vell educated. I learned histories, magic of many, many kinds...I learned all manner of diplomacy and espionage, ztealth and cunning. I also learned herbalism and lore, da rituals to please da dark gods, healing...and I learned it easily. I do not forget tings.

"Da Black Circle vas made by my people. It vas created in an attempt for my clan to expand da amount of zouls dey had access to. More zouls to zteal and absorb and rip apart vould mean more power. Plus, a realm so tied in vith da vorld of da dead made it easier to reanimate undead zlaves for armies or zervants.

"I...vill not tell you more of da tings dey vould do, Miroku. Vhen I vas of age, I vas given to da nearby dragon clan to cement an alliance. Zpecifically, to their crown prince, Zetsukosei. Da dragons valued me as a zeer, my family valued me as a zpy. Zetsukosei had...his own reasons to keep me. After a vhile, my clan sent me girl to mate, da daughter of two other powerful members of our clan."

Sairex was silent for a long moment. When he spoke, his voice was forced and heavy. "I vas not like dem. Perhaps it vas because I vas not permitted to join in da mental bonds my clan often did...it vas a vay they could zhare information and all increase deir knowledge and thus power. But as zon of da Chief and da Zhaman, I knew too many zecrets and vas not permitted to join for fear of vhat I may accidently reveal.

"I mated da girl out of a zense of duty...and I admit, I vas young and vanted more dan da frequently painful relations I had as Zetsukosei's pet. It...it vas not long after dat..." Sairex swallowed thickly. "One night my mate vas talking to me...and zhe vas...so eager for our child to be born. Zo eager to tear out its heart and eat its zoul zo zhe could get on to da next one. And I...I...zometing in me broke. I killed her and took her zoul. I destroyed it.

"My people found out...and zimply zent me a replacement mate. I ended up destroying her too. Zhe vas as bloodthirsty and vicked as dey all vere. Not long after dis, Zetsukosei performed da ritual dat made him a lich and I vas ztuck in da circle vith him. Not dat it made much difference to my clan, dey almost exclusively lived in da Circle by dis point.

"Dey had enough of my killing deir high-ranking daughters and instead hired assassins. I killed dem. Dey hired more assassins. I killed dem too. Dey ztarted zending clan members vith their assassination teams. I destroyed dem all. My people realized that to perform zuch a feat, I vas truly powerful...and den I became a target for dem and deir greed. Da lords began coming after me...it vas a mad rush to zee who could take my zoul first.

"I needed help fighting zo I used my knowledge of herbs and created a poison dat vould melt the mind, destroy da connections dat allow one to access deir zpiritual magics.

"Dey kept coming. I kept destroying dem. Eventually dey hit da breaking point, vhere da fear of me outveighed the lust to claim my zoul. Dey called me Deathraven and Kinslayer. Da clan vas decimated. I vent from prey to predator. I hunted down every zingle last one of dem and I killed dem. I destroyed every magical artifact I could not use, did not need. I memorized every book, every zcroll, every zcribbled note, and I destroyed all of it. Every dark altar and bloodztained blade.

"Vhen dere vas noting left, noting at all...I used my herbalism zkills and rendered myzelf infertile, dat I vould never by accident, design or force bear a child dat vas in any vay part of da Clan. It all ends vith me.

"Da Circle of course heard of dis as it vas happening. Any dat allied vith my clan and got in my vay did not live to regret it. And vith each death, I grew ztronger. Now I am da last true necromancer, and my powers over death are...great. All dat live vithin da Circle fear vhat I could do to dem. Dey do not believe I can be killed, and I do noting to dissuade dem of dat notion.

"None vould risk my wrath and attack me. Dey fear me enough to vant to remain anonymous in vhat dey do, vhich is vhy I vas targeted." Sairex sighed heavily. "If you tink me a horrid creature now, I vill understand."

"You rid the world of a cult of wicked, soul-eating fiends. You should be congratulated, not damned."

A slight smile twitched Sairex's lips. "Tank you, Miroku...if you'll excuse me, dis bird needs zome zleep now..."

Miroku crawled into bed and tugged Sairex into his arms, smiling at the startled expression the raven wore as it melted into a contented smile. "I could use a nap myself." In truth, he was more than a little shaken by Sairex's bloody tale, but he couldn't fault the raven for it. He had killed countless wicked demons himself. Still, it would take some getting used to.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru noticed their audience first, as his back wasn't to them like Toga's was. His eyes went from slits to popping wide. He let out a strangled noise, almost choking on Toga's tongue in the process. However, he couldn't really pull back out of the kiss, pinned to the wall as he was. He let out a little growl and grabbed his father by the ears in an effort to pull him back.

Toga let out a low, throaty growl, displeased at the sudden interruption, although the distant part of his mind that retained some semblance of coherency wondered at the increasingly frantic actions of his pup.

Inuyasha burst out laughing, the desperate look on Sesshoumaru's face simply undoing him. Toga leapt back from Sesshoumaru as if his pup had suddenly caught fire, whirling around as a bucket of mental ice-water cascaded over him. The red bled out of his eyes abruptly and reality returned like a punch to the stomach.

"Well, leave you two alone for ten minutes and look what happens..." Inuyasha snickered, genuinely amused. Sesshoumaru was blushing a darker shade than he'd ever seen and had ducked his head, making an effort to hide behind his bangs.

Toga looked rather cornered and felt more than a little uneasy. He had simply lost control of himself. Again. He hadn't thought about it at any point. He had simply acted, overwhelmed by desire. He should be better behaved than this...he was no fledgling youkai unable to control his inner demon, for gods' sake! And this was his SON. His damaged son who needed to be loved and cared for and cherished, not...well...ok, so he did love and cherish and care for him, and Sesshoumaru was just about perfect in every way, and gods he was gorgeous and delicious and felt so... // NO! My GODS, what is WRONG with me?! This resurrection must have...must have done something to my self control. I'm not some hormonal teenager or youkai brat...this absolutely MUST not continue. I will not take advantage of my pup like that. // He gave Sesshoumaru a guilty look, apologizing with his eyes, but another traitorous thought whispered deep in his mind. // But what if you want it to...? What if it's deeper than that? //

Rin bounced past him a moment later and threw herself at Sesshoumaru's waist in a hug. "Lord Sesshoumaru! Rin has missed you!"

Sesshoumaru let out a startled 'oof' and looked at his ward before slowly resting his hand on her head. "Hello, Rin."

Inuyasha snickered and leaned against the wall. Sesshoumaru gave him a Shut-UP-or-I-will-EVISCERATE-you Death Glare in response.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, Rin has lots of new things from Lady Kagome to show you." The girl leaned in conspiratorily, although every youkai in the room could easily hear her and she wasn't particularly quiet with her whisper. "And she brought you a special treat."

"Very well, Rin. You may show this Sesshoumaru your new things, if they are that important to you."

Rin beamed and escorted him out.

Toga was frowning heavily, staring at the floor, and he jumped when Inuyasha stepped closer.

"Hey, somethin' wrong, old man?" Inuyasha asked, hesitantly reaching out to grasp his father's shoulder.

Toga looked up, somewhat worried. "I should not have done what I did. Your brother has been through enough without me compounding it or confusing him."

Inuyasha paused to think about it. "Weren't you the one telling me he should get loved by the people that love him most? I doubt many people love him more than you do."

"But I'm not giving him a choice...we didn't discuss anything...and...damn it..." Toga ran his hands through his topknot to straighten some of the loose strands. "He has followed me and my wishes all his life. Your brother has been loyal and obedient to a fault. And I have done my best to teach him well and gods, I've succeeded...but..."

"But you don't want him responding just because he thinks you want him to or that its expected of him?"

"Yes, pup, that's exactly it."

Inuyasha chuckled. "Eh, I wouldn't worry about that too much. Sesshoumaru might idolize you, but he's not afraid to stick up for himself and he DOES NOT do things he does not want to do...and if he has to, believe me...EVERYONE knows his displeasure."

"I'm his father."

"Yeah? I'm his brother and you didn't see a problem with that. I think you're worrying about it a bit too much. And if it bothers you so much, ask Sesshoumaru. He may word it in a way that takes six translators to get to the bottom of, but he'll tell you the truth."

// Maybe I don't want to hear the truth... // Toga admitted to himself, although outwardly, he gave Inuyasha a smile and a quick hug of thanks.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Rin had bags upon bags of new clothes, all of them extremely foreign and futuristic in style, and Sesshoumaru had a brief moment to wonder how, exactly, they had gotten them all here. She also had many books. The bindings were strange and the words all looked identical - not one of them was handwritten. Rin then began producing small marvels and Sesshoumaru was thoroughly distracted.

First she produced a small rectangular object that flipped open. It had several buttons on either side of the screen. Rin explained it was a 'video game' and that you controlled the tiny bouncing figures by pushing the various buttons. It ran off of small metal energy tubes, 'batteries', of which she had a large supply. Next she pulled out a couple decks of 'playing cards' and said she could show him several games Kagome had taught her. Sesshoumaru nodded as he eyed it.

The next object was a board game that Rin said was called 'Risk'. You had armies and tried to use them to take over the world. Sesshoumaru's lips twitched into a wide smirk at that - he figured he would like this game very much.

Rin's next box was her present for him and she offered it with a smile. Sesshoumaru took the strange box - Rin called it a 'cooler' - and opened the lid. The inside was carefully packed with a variety of treats Rin had selected for him. Fruits he had never seen, small pastries in some sort of clear crinkly wrapping, a couple of bottles of liquid - Rin described them as 'Pepsi' and 'Mountain Dew', although Sesshoumaru had seen dew on mountains and it had CERTAINLY never looked like that - a round dessert Rin called a 'cheesecake', although it didn't look like a cake or smell like any cheese Sesshoumaru knew of, and one particularly fancy looking chocolate confection that Rin simply called a bump cake.

Sesshoumaru didn't know what to eat first and so he closed the lid - he would make that difficult decision later. "Thank you, Rin. It looks...wonderful."

Rin beamed. "Rin has eaten all of these things and they are wonderful! Food in Lady Kagome's world is amazing...but I am glad to be home."

Sesshoumaru eyed her. "Even though you give up your chance to be with humans and have an easy life? You are always going to be in danger here. Insulted by your own for choosing to stay with me. And I am a demon. I have done and will probably in the future do terrible things. You do not fear me?"

"I will never be afraid of you, Sesshoumaru-sama. My home is wherever you are and my place is with you. Rin does not belong anywhere else."

Sesshoumaru smiled and closed his eyes - just having her back with him made him happy, even if he would never admit it. She loved him unconditionally. "Welcome home, Rin."


	41. Chapter 40

Pride (In the Name of Love) 40 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mmmm, days off, yummy...*rolls around with it* Mmm... of course, I'm suffering power brownouts as I settle down to write this...if I have to restart, oh, I'll be angry. XD

Vyperbites, love...I just have to say...your review made me giggle. A lot. XD Nice thing to read when I first woke up. I wish AFF had a way I could respond directly to each review like FFnet does. Mediaminer doesn't have a reply feature either. Boo. Or I'm just a blonde and don't know how, thats possible too.

I do not know how this strange Love ... Trapezoid... that Sesshy is involved in will turn out. I really don't. I tried thinking about it and my brain short-circuited and I ended up sidetracked.

I leave you all with this. (and the chapter.) 1 x 0 = 0. 2 x 0 = 0. Therefore, 1 = 2. *twitches* *explodes* Sorry, but that's been bugging me all night.

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"So, tell me again about this flower you need for the antidote."

Sairex sighed and huffed at some loose strands of hair. He had finally gotten sick of the bandages and torn them off - the wounds were tiny and the light didn't bother his eyes just yet. He did hope his sight would return, and soon - being blind was dismally inconvenient and debilitating. Being mindblind, however, when he was so used to dipping into his spiritual powers...oh, that was so much worse.

"Miroku...its a long trip, it'd be dangerous, and da chances of it ztill existing are very tiny."

"Yeah, well, I'll be damned if I don't at least try. And if you don't help me, Buddha as my witness, I'll travel across the entire world and bring back an armload of every single flower that grows on the surface of this earth. Since that'd take a lot more time than I'd really like and be horribly inconvenient, not to mention wear out my footwear and my legs, it'll make things easier if you just tell me what I'm looking for and where to go."

Sairex snorted. "You probably would, at dat. I vould LOVE to zhow you a map, but I can't zee. I'd love to draw you a picture of da flower, but..." The raven hissed a bit in annoyance before taking a deep, calming breath. "Alright. Da flower grows in da mountain peaks. A good...mrrr...on foot...probably tree month journey vest of here. Da flower itzelf is vhite vith blue veins. It has four tapered petals. It grows on a vine. Careful of da thorns, its a carnivorous plant and mostly feeds off youkai blood, but I don't tink it'd make much of an exception for you just because you're human."

"Ok...how many do you need?"

"Vell, a nice section of vine vith a dozen or so flowers vould be perfect. But Miroku...I don't tink you're going to find it. And dat's a long trip."

"Well, it would be, if I intended to walk."

"You can't fly."

"No, but I live in a castle with a demon lord that knows how to teleport."

Sairex smirked. "You ARE crafty..."

"Yeah, well...hopefully Sesshoumaru will see fit to help me. Besides, the trip might do him some good, get a little fresh air and whatnot. Either way, I'll be back as soon as I can be. I won't let you suffer here alone for long."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku found Sesshoumaru standing in the dining hall staring warily at a strange bottle sitting on the table, his golden eyes wide. It was mostly filled with some sort of bubbling dark brown liquid. Miroku glanced at it, then at Sesshoumaru.

"Sesshoumaru-sama..."

Sesshoumaru nodded, still staring at the bottle. "Drink some of that."

Miroku eyed the bubbling, fizzy substance. "Er...what is it?"

"I am not sure."

"And you expect me to drink some when you do not know what it is? I'm sorry...but..."

"I did already. It is something Rin brought."

Miroku hesitantly lifted the bottle before taking a small drink. His eyes widened and he nearly dropped the bottle. He had never tasted anything so sweet, and the way the beverage fizzed was entirely foreign to him, although not entirely unpleasant. He quickly set it back down and stepped back to join Sesshoumaru, eyeing it skeptically. "Well, it's definitely very strange...but not bad."

"It cannot possibly be natural. What sort of fruit produces a juice such as this?"

"I don't know. Nothing I can think of...but if the humans of Kagome's time drink it, it can't be too dangerous."

Sesshoumaru nodded, half tempted to poke the Pepsi bottle with the tip of his sword to see if he could get it to froth angrily again as it had when he first opened it. He slowly recapped the liquid and noted it did not seem to mind that as much as it had minded being open. "Why do you seek out this Sesshoumaru, monk?"

"Sairex told me he knows what poisoned him, he...recognized the smell. And he knows what to do to make an antidote, but the plant I need to get is about a three month journey one way for me. I...don't really want to be gone for half a year to look for something that could be used...well. Now."

"So you wish me to take you there that you may search."

"Please."

"I owe the raven much. I will do this thing for you."

"Thank you, Sesshoumaru-sama." Miroku bowed his head humbly, very grateful, although he was surprised to hear that Sesshoumaru felt he owed Sairex - not so much that Sesshoumaru felt that way, but that he would openly admit it.

"One moment. Follow me." Sesshoumaru walked down the hall a short way to where Rin was arranging things in her room. "Rin. Come." He then turned and strode down the hallway towards the main door.

Miroku blinked as the girl immediately dropped what she was doing and scrambled after Sesshoumaru, falling into place a step to the left and three steps behind him, beaming widely. // Well, he certainly has HER trained... //

Once outside, Sesshoumaru took Rin's hand and then extended his other to grab Miroku by the arm. "Close your eyes, it will be less disorienting and I do not wish to waste time with you being ill."

Hurriedly, Miroku complied. He felt a sudden lurching shift and a nauseating sensation of being pulled in too many directions at once. It stopped quickly, however, and the air around him was suddenly bitingly cold. He found himself plunged into knee-deep snow. The sudden chill made him gasp and snap his eyes open.

They were standing on the peak of the tallest mountain in the range, actually on top of the highest rock. It was really quite dramatic, and the view was breathtaking. Miroku wondered if the dramatic pose came naturally to Sesshoumaru or if he actively planned such things out. He decided he didn't care and began his search.

"Rin. We are here to pick flowers."

Rin's eyes widened hugely, as if Sesshoumaru had just given her the best present in all the world. She did SO love picking flowers...but Sesshoumaru-sama had never seemed to care about them before. And now, here he was, making a special trip out just for that? Rin squealed in delight.

"They are well hidden. Be careful, and do not touch them when you see them. Let us know." Rin nodded happily and bounded off.

Miroku watched the girl bounce off through the snowdrifts, although she never actually went out of sight. She was always within range, as if she had some built-in perimeter alarm that would not let her get more than a certain distance from Sesshoumaru. "Was it really a good idea to bring her?"

"If there are any flowers to be found...Rin can find them. I speak from long experience." Sesshoumaru responded with a slight smirk before setting to the task of searching himself.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga paced back and forth in agitation before sighing, willing himself to calm down. He stripped off his armor and his sword belts and dressed in a pair of light sleeping pants. He unbound his hair and brushed it out, then brushed his mokomokos too. He set down his comb and stared at his bed, suddenly feeling absurdly lonely. He had learned from Sairex that Miroku had went to Sesshoumaru to ask for some assistance, and since his elder pup was not present, Sesshoumaru must have granted his request.

Toga scowled and stalked out of his room, letting himself wander the halls. He found himself standing in Sesshoumaru's room, although he didn't really know what he intended to do there. He was soon staring into space, lost in thought.

He almost didn't sense the danger that appeared behind him in time. Something in his head suddenly screamed at him to move, and he obeyed his instinct, diving forward to roll across the bed just as a vicious whip of black energy sizzled through the space he had just occupied. An enraged, slightly lisping voice yelled after him.

"SESSHOUMARU! YOU WILL PAY FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE TO ME!"

Toga blinked and then smirked to himself as he turned. With his hair down from behind, and in Sesshoumaru's room no less, he supposed the mistake would be easy enough to make.

The sight of the being in front of him put him on his guard. The creature was just inhuman enough to be disconcerting. It looked somewhat stretched, the limbs and features a bit too long and skinny. The creature's otherwise smooth face had been clawed and torn, the flesh horribly burned and melted. // Sesshoumaru's poison...so he must have had a run-in with this creature in the past. //

The cloaked creature gasped when he realized his mistake. "You are not Sesshoumaru!"

"No, more's the pity for you. I do not take kindly to those that would attack my pups. Who are you and how did you run afoul of my son's claws?"

The cloaked demon hissed. "Jormandar, Lord of the Northern Circle. Your son is a most disobedient whore and saw fit to attack me. Oh, he will regret it, Inu no Taisho. He simply should have done his duty willingly."

Jormandar realized that the low rumble reverberating through the floor of the castle was originating from Toga. The taiyoukai's eyes had flushed crimson and he was growling terribly, fangs bared. He barely managed to get out of the way as Toga leapt with a feral roar.

Toga missed, but the moment his feet hit the ground he sprang again, reversing his direction with shocking agility and speed. Jormandar was prepared, however, and a sharp crack from his black whip connected with Toga's chest. His flesh split and a sizzling, burning pain erupted through him...and Toga ignored it, not stopping or slowing in the slightest. His claws connected with the retreating demon's arm, tearing his flesh to ribbons and spilling his dark black blood to the floor.

Jormandar howled and lashed out again, his pupilless black eyes narrowing. No matter how many injuries he gave the ferally enraged inu, however, Toga did not slow.

The circle demon knew he was unprepared for this. He had taken precautions against what he knew Sesshoumaru would be capable of, but things had gone so wrong. He had thought his opportunity at hand! Sairex was out of commission and unable to stop his carefully tailored spells he had woven through the room - spells specifically tailored to Sesshoumaru, he remembered with a painful scowl - the demon was alone... how could he have been so foolish? He let out another howl as Toga's claws tore massive lines down his chest, narrowly missing his throat.

"Do not think this is over!" he finally spat, his form vanishing as he let his body drop out of the physical world back to the shadow-world of the Black Circle.

Toga howled in rage as his prey escaped him. He stood for a long moment, chest heaving. The only sound was the steady drip of blood to the floor. Slowly, the crimson drained from his eyes. He had been too slow, too weak...he should have been able to crush the other demon like a miserable gnat.

// Oh, my Sesshoumaru...// he thought with a painful wince. This creature had dared try to force himself on his son, dared call him a whore?! // I'll destroy that entire damn realm...I will slay every foul wretch that breathes that tainted air...and this Jormandar will be the first to feel my claws again. //

Toga felt inordinately weary and heavy. He growled softly as he took a step towards the door, his mind made up on his course of action. He would avenge his pup of this insult and the grief this creature had caused him.

He never did make it. Another half step and he faltered. Golden eyes that had long since lost any ability to determine features of the darkening, spinning room slowly rolled back into his head as the ground rushed up to meet him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha scowled. He had just come back from patrol, and was eager to talk to SOMEONE. But he couldn't find anyone. Sairex was in bed sleeping, and he wasn't about to bother the injured raven. Miroku was nowhere to be seen - that was odd. His father wasn't in his room, and neither was Sesshoumaru for that matter. // They must not have went to bed yet. // Inuyasha was well aware that his father's fierce protectiveness wouldn't allow him to let Sesshoumaru out of his presence during the night when he slept, no matter how many issues he may have been having.

But if they were still awake, where were they? Much to Inuyasha's surprise, Rin's room was empty as well. // Did they all go out on a trip and not let me know?... Well, Sessh might have but the old man wouldn't just abandon the throne without at least TELLING me... //

It was about then that he smelled blood. Inuyasha's heart skipped a beat as he drew his sword and tore down the hallway towards his brother's room. He skidded to a stop and stared in numb horror, unable to move for a moment as he looked at his father laying face down in a slowly expanding pool of blood.

Inuyasha let out a howl and threw down his sword, hurrying over and dropping to his knees. A slight sense of relief tugged at him as he realized his sire was both breathing and had a heartbeat. His body was covered in deep lashes that smelled faintly of burnt flesh. Some of them had laid him open to the bone.

Carefully he lifted Toga from the ground, surprised at how heavy he was. Apparently, his father had been taking regaining lost muscle mass very seriously. The hanyou moved as quickly as he dared, trying to jostle the wounded inu as little as possible. He screamed at the first servant he saw to get the healer and have a room prepared, and the horrified maid tore off to do just that.

Inuyasha was getting very tired of his friends, family, and loved ones being targeted and hurt and the castle guard not stopping ANY of them. Ever.

It was time to call in some help from an old friend.


	42. Chapter 41

Pride (In the Name of Love) 41 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - The bad guy has been revealed! Bwahahaha...two points to anyone that saw it coming.

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The search proved to be long and fruitless. After scouring three different mountains - and pausing for the brief trip when Sesshoumaru had to go back to the castle to retrieve some warmer clothing for the humans, which he did with minimal grumbling - their search was still proving fruitless. Miroku looked sorely disheartened. Sesshoumaru found himself feeling bad for the monk, even if he didn't let it show. He decided it was time to try emergency methods.

"Rin."

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama?" the girl asked with a smile.

"We must find these flowers. Tell me, which mountain do you suppose is the best place for them to be located on?"

Rin squinted off into the distance as if studying each of the visible peaks. She finally pointed at one in the distance. "That one."

Miroku shrugged - one was as good as another to him. He closed his eyes and prepared for the gut-wrenching teleportation. Each one left him feeling more and more ill.

The new mountaintop looked to be much the same as the last three, save for a small frozen spring hidden amidst the crags. The surface was frozen, but Miroku knew the water underneath must be flowing still. A few trees actually clung to life - this particular peak was at a lower elevation than the others. Sesshoumaru simply sat back, smirking triumphantly. Miroku paused next to him before taking up the search again. "Why so smug? We haven't found anything yet..."

"Rin will find them."

Miroku sighed and picked a direction to trudge off in. He was beginning to think that maybe Sairex was right and the flowers had indeed gone extinct over the years. So it was with a good measure of surprise and a huge burst of hope that just reeked of threatening disappointment that he heard Rin's joyful singing.

"I found them! I found them!" Like some sort of strange floral bloodhound, against all odds, the girl had indeed located them. The tall silvery-white vine was camoflauged well against the snow. It snaked all around the base of a tree and up it's length. Clear, narrow thorns that looked almost like icicles and ranged in length from a quarter inch to four studded the length of the vine. Beautiful four-petaled blooms grew along the vine's length as well, white and delicately traced with an icy blue pattern.

Miroku stared, dumbfounded. Sesshoumaru looked at him, genuinely amused. "You have not been the subject of Rin's floral escapades over the past several years as this Sesshoumaru has. I could not get the smell off my skin. She would find them in barren wastelands." Miroku simply chuckled helplessly.

Sesshoumaru nodded to Rin. "Thank you, you have done well." He then walked over to the vine and examined it before grabbing hold of a section.

Instantly, the vine came to life in his hands, lashing around him and stabbing thorns at him. The startled taiyoukai growled and leapt back, yanking with tremendous force and slashing at the bloodthirsty plant with his claws. The vine writhed and recoiled, squirming about in vegetable agony. Sesshoumaru growled and gave Miroku an accusatory look as he started plucking dagger-like thorns out of his forearm.

"Hey, I knew it was carnivorous but not that it was so...er...lively." Miroku hesitantly prodded the several-foot length at Sesshoumaru's feet. When it didn't move, he bent down to pick it up. "Think this is enough?"

Sesshoumaru didn't answer - he stalked back towards the plant with murder in his eyes.

"Oh dear." Miroku sighed.

Sesshoumaru stalked around the base of the tree until he found the thickest part of the vines, where they dug into the ground. Rather than yank out his sword and begin wreaking veggie vengeance, however, the taiyoukai ducked in close, neatly dodging vines that lashed at him abruptly. As the vines struggled to break free of snow and ice, untangle the little creeping tendrils that had held them so still in place for so long, Sesshoumaru grabbed the base of the massive plant and pulled with all his strength.

Miroku blinked as the plant was slowly pulled out of the ground, trailing thick white roots. Several had broken, but there were many intact. Sesshoumaru yanked the rest of the plant free of the tree, using a few of the smaller vines to bind the mess into a mostly immobile, sizeable bundle. "I ... I didn't think we needed quite that many..."

"This Sesshoumaru is taking up gardening upon our return."

"What?!"

"It will provide excellent protection along the outer walls if it survives. If not, it dies for daring to stab me."

Miroku couldn't help but grin, and Rin was all smiles at the concept of her Lord taking an interest in planting flowers - even if they WERE bloodthirsty carnivorous vines. Right now, however, he couldn't care less what Sesshoumaru wanted to do with the remainder of the plant. He had what he needed to help Sairex, and that was all that mattered.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Lord Inuyasha, the guest you required sent for has arrived."

"Good, send 'em in."

The attendant bowed and scurried off. A moment later, the doors were thrown open.

"Well, I see castle life hasn't changed you a bit. You're as ugly as ever, mutt-face."

Inuyasha wrinkled his nose and stalked towards his visitor. "And you smell as foul as ever, wolf. Ugh."

Kouga grinned widely and clapped Inuyasha on the shoulder. "So you're a big fancy lordling now, huh? Why the hell did you send for me? And my pack, no less? I'm not draggin' em all the way here for no reason."

Inuyasha beckoned for the wolf prince to follow them. While the two of them still regularly insulted each other, they had become friends over the years. They had gotten closer after Kagome's departure, both admitting that their protectiveness of the priestess was the real reason they fought, not really so much a personal dislike of each other.

Inuyasha led Kouga to the dining hall and told the attendants to bring some food - a decision the wolf prince heartily agreed with. "So yeah, mutt...what's this all about?"

Inuyasha fidgeted before trying his best to look diplomatic, to adopt the casual and smooth expression his father and his brother both so easily wore when dealing with business matters. Kouga snorted and then burst out laughing, drawing a deep scowl from the hanyou.

"Meh, stupid wolf..."

"I'm not the one that looks like I just sat on an anthill!"

"Bah, I hate this political bullshit. I'll be straight with you. It's impossible to get good help around here. The castle guard all suck. We've been attacked several times and not one of them noticed a single one. Our chief advisor is laid up, my father's a mess, S--"

"Maybe the political bullshit is eating your brain, dog-breath. Your father's dead, has been all your life...remember?" To his credit, Kouga attempted a gentle tone when breaking that news.

"Long story, believe me, but our chief advisor is this crazy raven youkai with all sorts of magic and shit. Him and my monk friend did some sort of ritual thing with my brother's sword and they brought him back from the dead."

"No shit?"

"Yeah. Anyway, the castle guard sucks and I can't trust any of them. So I wanted to ask you if you'd replace em, you and your pack. In return, you get food, shelter, and paid."

Kouga frowned, thinking about it. It certainly was an opportunity to get out of the caves his clan lived in...not that they really minded the caves. Living so 'civilized' would be incredibly strange for all of them...but they wouldn't have to deal with random predators, bouts of starvation or poor weather. "Wait a second...this means I'd be under you, doesn't it?"

Inuyasha smiled demurely. "I don't recall you complaining last time you were under me."

Kouga flushed, his tail bristling. "Don't be an ass, you know what I meant."

Inuyasha chuckled. "Yeah, you would..but only for a couple weeks. Then the old man is takin' back over. But he'll stick by my decision, he's not fond of anyone workin' on the staff right now since they're all new and the guards have been fucking useless. So you'd be serving under him. Directly."

Kouga grinned. "Got it. I suppose this place COULD use some demons of REAL character with nothing but you mutts and some worthless servants around..."

"Oh, spare me...the stench of wolf is barely worth the benefit of having you watching our walls. I'm probably half mad to even consider it."

The wolf prince snickered, then squinted. "Hey, wait a second...what about your brother? What's he got to say in all this?"

"Er....Sessh...doesn't contradict my decisions and doesn't outrank the old man, lets just leave it at that. I really can't say much."

"I got ya. Well, mutt, you have yourself a deal. Consider us hired."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru smirked as he finally finished planting his new 'flower' just outside the eastern wall of the palace. He rather hoped it would survive but wouldn't be too sad if it didn't. Still rather amused, he headed into the palace towards his room.

The scent of blood - his FATHER'S blood - hit him like a physical blow and he stared at the servants working to scrub the mess from his floors. He grabbed one by the throat and hoisted the unfortunate demon off the floor, growling dangerously. His worry was almost tangible. "What happened here?! Where is my Lord Father?!"

The servant somehow managed to choke out that he had been brought to the healer's quarters. Sesshoumaru dropped the man and almost ran down the hall. He threw open the door to the healer's chamber so forcefully he nearly tore it off its hinges. The healer squawked in surprise and almost fell over.

Sesshoumaru ignored him, hurrying to the bedside. He sucked in a sharp breath at the sight of his father's wounds. The healer narrowed his eyes at Sesshoumaru but kept his tone respectful. "He was injured fairly deeply, but will recover with no lasting ill effects. He is already much healed."

"If he is healing on his own, then what are you doing?" Sesshoumaru's tone had dropped from angry and worried to a more level tone, his question more out of curiosity than anything.

"I am cleaning his wounds. There is some sort of...black film in them preventing them from closing on their own. The ones I have cleaned are already starting to heal on their own."

"And you are sure he is out of danger?"

"Unless something has occurred that I do not know of? Yes."

"Leave us. I will tend to him."

The healer's eyes widened marginally but he nodded and took his leave of the room. Sesshoumaru eyed his father's prone form for a moment, biting back the whine that formed unbidden in his throat. Even though he knew he was going to be alright, seeing him so cut up and pale just didn't sit well with Sesshoumaru.

After taking off his armor and his haori so the long sleeves wouldn't get in the way, he set to the process of cleaning the wounds the healer hadn't gotten to yet. He hesitated, unsure of how hard to press to do the job sufficiently without hurting him worse, but still getting them clean. A gentle swipe proved ineffective.

Sesshoumaru learned that he actually had to scrub fairly hard to get the caustic black substance out of the wounds, and that once he did so, they bled freely, but cleanly. It took longer and more work than he thought and he was a bloody mess by the time he was finished, but he found he felt better in an ironic sort of way.

He knew both him and his sire would benefit from a long bath in the hot springs, but he was tired and didn't want to leave. He knew he would probably regret it come morning, but he gave in to the urge to lay down. Sesshoumaru hesitantly curled up next to Toga's less injured side and shut his eyes. Sleep claimed him far more quickly than he would have imagined.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku returned triumphant to his room. Sairex was sleeping, but Miroku was a little too excited to allow THAT to continue. "Sairex...wake up."

Sairex mumbled something low in his throat and curled his wing over his head in response. Miroku smirked and trailed his finger along the arch of said wing, causing the raven's body to stiffen slightly and his breath to hitch. However, much as Miroku liked the thought of teasing and caressing his lover awake, he regrettably did not want to delay his good news for the inevitable bout of loving that would result. // Maybe next time. // "Sairex..." he purred. Well, maybe he could have a LITTLE fun...

With a little maneuvering, Miroku managed to get the shielding wing out of his way, leaning in to nip at the raven's ear. Sairex let out a sleepy noise and the monk simply smirked, moving to trail his lips down the slender throat. His hands slowly slid down Sairex's sides in a gentle caress.

Miroku sighed inwardly. If he didn't stop this VERY soon, he knew he wouldn't have the willpower to. He settled in, determined to kiss his lover awake.

Eventually he got a conscious reaction from Sairex and paused to let his sleepy bird wake up and breathe a bit. "Well, good morning to you...or evening, I suppose. It's fairly late."

"Mm, you're back faster dan I expected."

"We found them."

Sairex's eyes flew open at that - not that it did him any good, but despite being sightless his expressions still showed clearly in them. "You did? Really?"

"I wouldn't lie to you. Sesshoumaru brought the whole damn plant back and planted it outside the castle wall. I don't know if it'll live, though, considering it's warmer here."

"I...I didn't tink you'd ever find it." The raven broke into a wide grin. "Da rest is almost all easy, its just..preparation. Da only other difficult ting...I need da heart of a dragon youkai."

"Er...I suppose I'll send one of the others for one in the morning then. I could go myself, but...I'm not fool enough to think that I can hold a candle to any of our inu friends in a demon battle."

"Dis is vonderful news. It may be difficult for me to describe how you'll have to prepare tings, but ve'll manage." Sairex's fingers hesitantly found Miroku's face, trailing lightly over his cheeks before grabbing him and pulling him down for a kiss. Miroku was more than happy to comply, his arms curling around his lover and pulling him close.

"I take it there is time for celebration then?" he murmured with a smile.

"After vaking me up like you did, it'd be cruel if ve didn't."

"Well, I would never want to be accused of cruelty!" Miroku said in mock horror before grinning and moving to make up for his 'torment' of the raven.


	43. Chapter 42

Pride (In the Name of Love) 42 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - People working on the roof all day + Jess needing to sleep all day for work all night = No Sleep At All = Exhaustion. Stab me with a spork until I expire, it can only feel better than this headache. Ugh.

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A vague sense of something not quite right gnawed at the back of Toga's mind, drawing him from his slumber. He stretched slightly and yawned. His skin felt tight and his flesh tender in several places - mildly uncomfortable, but it meant his injuries were well on their way to being healed.

Toga felt something warm against his side, and a slight sniff confirmed it was Sesshoumaru. He wondered idly at that - he knew from the strong medicinal smell drifting from numerous bottles and jars lining shelves on the wall that he was in the healer's quarters. Rather unsurprising, given the events of the previous morning.

His heart suddenly froze as he realized what woke him up. A low, keening whine - the noise of an inu in the extremes of agony - came from his pup's throat. Toga's eyes snapped open in alarm and he sat up partway to look at Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru had his claws dug deeply into the mattress. He was drenched with sweat and flushed - he looked feverish. His chest was heaving, his breathing coming in short and shallow pants.

Toga cursed inwardly and shook him gently. "Wake up, my Sesshoumaru..."

He was unprepared for the violence of Sesshoumaru's reaction. Wild golden eyes snapped open, although it was obvious from the way they darted and rolled that the younger taiyoukai wasn't seeing anything around him but rather whatever was in his head. With a strangled scream, Sesshoumaru attempted to bolt blindly.

Toga was not about to let his pup go anywhere in such a condition and latched on to him. Sesshoumaru's reaction was even more panicked, and he let out a noise somewhere between a snarl and a whine, struggling wildly. Toga growled and grabbed him by the wrists, shifting to pin him down. Sesshoumaru still almost tore free of him with strength borne of desperation, but Toga outweighed him by a good deal and had better leverage.

Toga gritted his teeth together in a sharp hiss of pain as Sesshoumaru's long claws gouged deeply into his wrists, narrowly arching his neck out of the way to avoid a sharp clicking snap of his son's teeth. He growled deeply in his chest. "SESSHOUMARU!"

Something clicked dimly in the terrified taiyoukai's mind. His thrashing abruptly stilled as his eyes came into focus. He sucked in a breath, trying hard to calm his rapid heartbeat as he took stock of his situation. He choked a bit when he realized the liquid warmth running freely down his fingers was blood from claws still deeply hooked into his father's wrists.

Mortified, he withdrew them, unable to keep the quiver from running through him. He shut eyes stinging with tears and tried to gasp out an apology. Oh, he did not want his father to see him in such a shameful state...but the dream had been so real, the pain, the rending and tearing and the unreasonable horror...

Toga shifted, releasing Sesshoumaru when he realized that he had come back to his senses, although his own distress was acute. He wanted more than anything to be able to comfort his pup's torment. It was painfully obvious how fragile Sesshoumaru was at that moment...his pup had curled up into a ball, clutching his stomach tightly and breathing in shuddering gasps. Toga bit back his own instinctual whine and pulled his Sesshoumaru into his arms. His body was stiff and he resisted at first, flinching at his father's touch...but after a moment he accepted it and curled up tightly against him, burying his face in Toga's chest and desperately seeking comfort from the violent memories that ate at him. He had thought himself free of the nightmares - in fact, he hadn't had one since he had awaken in Kagome's apartment finding himself being eaten alive by bugs. And that, well...it wasn't so much a nightmare as a prelude to a painful reality.

Toga's chest rumbled reassuringly as he slowly threaded his fingers through Sesshoumaru's hair in gentle strokes. He could feel his pup calming down, soothed by his presence, and he offered silent thanks. He flicked a glance to his wrists and frowned slightly. He was still bleeding heavily and the wounds would need to be tended, and soon. It wouldn't do to survive an attack by an enemy just to accidently be bled out by his pup.

Sesshoumaru finally swallowed the last vestiges of his panic, some semblance of calm returning to him. He pulled away enough to look at his father, silently thanking him with his eyes. His nose twitched a moment later and he frowned, turning to examine the deep punctures he'd made in Toga's wrists, his expression guilty. "I...am so sorry...I did not mean..."

"It is alright. You were not yourself. However, I do need to attend to them...and then, perhaps, a bath for us both? You are nearly as much a mess as I. How did that come to be?"

Sesshoumaru had busied himself snagging bandages and some healing ointments, swatting away Toga's hands when he attempted to take care of the injuries himself. "I came in last night after lending my assistance to the monk and found you injured here. The healer was tending your wounds but I took over. There was some sort of foul substance in them that needed to be scrubbed out. It caused you to bleed a good deal and I rather made a mess."

Toga smiled slightly. "Well, I thank you. I feel much better this morning."

"Before or after I impaled you?"

Toga laughed softly. "I have had worse in my time, believe me. And the wounds are deep but narrow. I'll be fine soon enough."

Sesshoumaru judged the bandaging to be adequate and stood up slowly. He winced as he glanced at his father, than himself in the mirror, then the surrounding area. Blood was everywhere. "Perhaps a bath would indeed be a quite good idea for us both. Red hair does not become you."

"Hah! I would look good in any color hair," Toga responded, peering in the mirror with a wince. "Hrm. Perhaps you are right." Despite the mess, though, he was quite pleased with how much his wounds had healed. They were little more than angry, tender red marks now save for the very worst of them.

"This Sesshoumaru is always right."

Toga rolled his eyes. "Ah, of course, how could I ever forget. Come along then, pup. I...have something I need to discuss with you anyway. It is fairly important."

Sesshoumaru nodded. He paused long enough to grab himself some clean clothing, and his father did the same. Soon the two were ensconced in one of the castle's indoor hot springs.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku awoke to gleeful cackling from his lover and slowly squinted open an eye. "Mrrph...what's got you so excited?"

"I've decided dis blindness is not all bad. In fact, it be damned convenient right now."

"And what makes you say that?" Miroku asked, wondering if the poison hadn't fried Sairex's mind after all.

" Kakaka...no morning zunlight in my eyes!" Sairex chuckled, folding his arms behind his head and basking contentedly in the warm glow.

"Leave it to you to be so pleased by something like that..."

"Mm, lemme alone, I had a good night. Tings feel zo much more intense vhen you can't zee."

Miroku chuckled at that. "Well, I'm glad I could assist your mood. I suppose I should go see about getting that dragon heart for you, eh?

"Eh. I zuppose da morning zun is a zmall price to pay for my magic back...but I'll enjoy it until you return."

Miroku leaned in and gave the raven a lingering kiss. "Fine, I'll leave you to bask. I'll let you know how things go."

It wasn't hard for Miroku to find Inuyasha, although he was quite shocked to see Kouga with him.

"Hey! Monk, how's it goin'?"

"Hello, Kouga...a pleasure to see you. What brings you here?"

"Inuyasha hired me and my pack. New castle guard. Guess this makes me captain or somethin'."

"Well, that's wonderful news." Miroku smiled warmly - he meant it. He had always liked the wolf.

"What's up, Miroku?" Inuyasha asked curiously.

"Oh...well, Sairex needs something that I can't get for him so he can make the antidote to the poison affecting him."

"Really? What's he need? I can get it for ya."

Miroku plastered on his best innocent smile. "The heart of a dragon youkai."

"...You're serious."

"Well, yes."

Inuyasha sighed heavily. Sure, he could take down about any normal demon, but dragons were strong and could be trouble.

"Eh, if mutt-face can't do it for you, I will."

"Pfft, I could kill ten before you finished dancing around your first, fleabag."

Kouga's response was cut short at the sudden choked noise from right down the hall. The three males turned in time to see Rin stumbling back against the wall. Her eyes were locked on Kouga as if he were evil incarnate, the terror in her eyes very evident.

"Oh shit...Rin, you don't have to worry..." But Inuyasha was too late. With a noise too terrified and choked to be a scream, Rin took off running, remembering very clearly how the wolves had run her down when she was younger and tore the life from her.

"Way to go, asshole!" Inuyasha growled at Kouga, slapping him upside the back of his head.

"Ow! Hey, I didn't fucking do anything! What's her problem!?"

"Your fucking wolves killed her a few years back. Sesshoumaru revived her and that's how she ended up becoming his shadow. You better make yourself scarce until I explain your presence to Sesshoumaru, cause I guarantee that's where she's headed."

"Fuck my life..." Kouga muttered. "Fine, I'll be in my room...let me know when your brother doesn't want to decapitate me and eat my heart."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru and Toga spent several minutes in silence, busily scrubbing themselves clean and helping each other with their hair. Eventually they were both satisfied and settled back against the smooth, carved walls of the spring to relax.

Toga was getting more and more edgy, however, and Sesshoumaru could notice it. It wasn't like his father to be at all fidgety. As long as the younger taiyoukai had known, Toga was always confident and sure of himself. "My Lord Father?"

Toga sighed heavily and then shifted so he was sitting next to Sesshoumaru instead of across from him. "I need to talk to you about...something serious."

"Of course," Sesshoumaru responded, arching one eyebrow slightly. His curiosity was eating him alive.

"I'm not sure how to say this..." Toga muttered. Sesshoumaru had the distinct impression his father would be blushing about now, if he were anyone other than who he was. "I have, of late, begun to exhibit an extreme lack of self control in regards to you, my Sesshoumaru."

Oh. That. Now it was Sesshoumaru's turn to beat back the heat threatening to color his cheeks.

"I do not know what to do about it. This is a difficult subject for me to broach. Never before my resurrection did I ever look at you as anything other than my precious pup. I loved you terribly, of course, but I never..." Toga sighed. This was not going well and was harder to say than he had thought. "The other day it suddenly hit me that you are not JUST my pup. You are strong, intelligent, and absolutely beautiful...quite possibly the most desirable creature I have ever seen. I have begun to have thoughts of you that no father should ever bear towards their son."

Now Sesshoumaru WAS blushing and no amount of fighting it was meeting with any success.

"I...I apologize. It is...wrong of me to think such things, but I find I cannot help myself. I wish to be close to you and when I am, I am growing overwhelmed. I've already kissed you twice and not even realized I had done it until it was far too late to stop it." Toga sighed heavily, giving Sesshoumaru a vaguely guilty look. "And I... can not bring myself to regret the act, even if I regret the effect it may have on you. I do not want to take advantage of you. I do not want....ah, dammit..."

Sesshoumaru hesitantly met Toga's eyes. "You would never take advantage of me, nor would you ever hurt me in any way. Any action you take in regards to me, now as always, have always been governed by your love. This Sesshoumaru is not so blinded to emotion to recognize this."

"I never meant to insinuate you are. It is just...it...it is wrong of me. You are my pup. I should not want to crush you to me, to taste you and ravish you and claim you..." Sesshoumaru swallowed hard, knowing he couldn't possibly blush any harder, especially at the husky and cracking tone his father's voice took on as he finished his thought. "..but I do. Oh, I do..."

A wave of volatile, conflicting emotions and sensations tore through Sesshoumaru. He had truly believed what he said, that his father would never do anything to hurt him...but that didn't mean he was prepared for this. He didn't know what to do or what to say in response, flicking his tongue over suddenly too-dry lips at the intense and heavy look in Toga's eyes.

It turned out Sesshoumaru didn't have to worry about his response. The door to the bathing room flew open as a sobbing, terrified Rin shot into the room. She ran straight into the hot spring, not bothering to slow down to remove any of her clothing or even her shoes, simply launching herself at Sesshoumaru.


	44. Chapter 43

Pride (In the Name of Love) 43 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mmm...Bananas Foster Cappuccino...this coming from someone who has been very adamantly outspoken against coffee and all it's brethren... I can't help it...is good...shocked me. Anyway...lol...

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Sesshoumaru blinked rapidly and wrapped his arms around the sobbing, nearly hysterical girl. He couldn't remember the last time he'd seen Rin in such a state. He held her close until she quieted some. "Rin...what is wrong? What has happened?"

Rin shuddered and buried his face in his chest. "W..w...wolves..."

"Did you have a nightmare of them again?" Sesshoumaru barely repressed a shudder. He knew now how potent and horrifying nightmares could be. He made a mental note to apologize to Rin later. In the past, he hadn't been quite as understanding when Rin would awaken terrified. Surely, he had calmed her down and felt for her terror...but he had thought it somewhat foolish to be frightened of something obviously not real.

He wouldn't make THAT mistake again.

Rin, however, shook her head enthusiastically, looking at Sesshoumaru with sorrowful, terror-stricken eyes and clinging to him as if he were her only chance of survival. "N-no...they are HERE."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows shot up at that. "Here? There are wolves in my castle, Rin?"

Rin nodded and buried her face against him again.

"Tell this Sesshoumaru where you saw these wolves and what they were doing." There was a cold note in Sesshoumaru's voice, an icy coating on his words that promised swift and painful retribution on these wolves for daring to so upset his Rin.

"They...were talking with Lord Inuyasha...I think..."

// Hmm..why ARE there wolves in...ahem...YOUR castle, my pup? What is your brother up to? // Toga thought, curious. // And where DID you ever get the habit of referring to yourself in the third person...surely not from me... //

"This Sesshoumaru will take care of it. Rin, stay with my Lord Father...he will keep you safe."

Rin looked at Sesshoumaru in terror, not wanting him to leave her. Much as she liked Toga and trusted him...this was her personal terror, her deepest of fears...and she couldn't bear the thought of Sesshoumaru not being with her.

Sesshoumaru looked helplessly at her father when Rin refused to move and clung more tightly to him, her fingers latched onto his hair and his mokomoko.

"Easy, child..." Toga murmured soothingly. "I shall go deal with these wolves for you. You can stay with my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru wavered between frowning and gratitude - he knew Rin needed to be calmed down and his father likely could not accomplish such as he could...but he hated not dealing with what he saw as HIS problem and thus protecting her. But the decision was already out of his hands.

Toga glanced at the girl to make sure she wasn't watching - her head was turned the other way and she didn't appear to be moving any time soon from her place buried against Sesshoumaru - and then got out of the water, wringing out his hair. Sesshoumaru averted his own eyes quickly, feeling a suddenly all-too-familiar burn in his cheeks. After all, Rin had interrupted a rather...delicate...conversation.

Toga wrapped himself in a towel and headed out.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After dressing quickly and strapping on his sword belt, Toga strode down the hallways. It didn't take him long to pick up the scent of wolf. A lone one, it would seem, and in his guest chambers no less.

He figured that if Inuyasha had been speaking to this wolf, he likely WAS genuinely a guest and no threat...and thus he would be polite. Sesshoumaru might not have been as considerate.

The door opened hesitantly a moment later and Kouga blinked, swallowing a bit as his eyes traveled up the powerful inu's form. Inuyasha wasn't much bigger than Kouga was...and Sesshoumaru was tall but graceful and willowy. Toga, even in his still-recovering state, was broader and more physically powerful than either of his boys.

"Greetings, wolf. Do you know who I am?"

"The Inu no Taisho..." Kouga bowed his head in respect.

Toga nodded. "Indeed. And I am most interested to find out both who you are and why you are here."

Kouga scowled. "Hn...stupid mut--...um....Ahem. Inuyasha invited me and offered me and my pack work. He said that your current castle guard was ... lacking...and he wanted someone watching the walls that he could trust."

Toga's eyebrow arched. "Is that so...you are a friend of my son, then?"

"In...a manner of speaking. Yeah, I suppose I am."

"And you are?"

"Prince Kouga of the Northern Wolf Tribe."

"Ah, I see." Toga inclined his head. "I have had dealings with your ancestors in days past, though you are a bit young for me to have known. Welcome to my home. It will be an honor to have your pack defending these walls. Be at peace, I bear you no ill will."

Kouga breathed a sigh of relief he hadn't realized he was holding. "Thank you, my Lord." Deferring to Toga was strange and the formality came awkwardly to Kouga, but he couldn't deny it was fitting. Toga had a PRESENCE about him that made one simply want to drop to their knees in supplication and fealty. He absolutely radiated strength and confident power.

"I will also attempt to deflect my Sesshoumaru. His ward, Rin, is most distraught at your presence. I will trust you will work it out and I will assist...but my pup is very protective of the girl. The simple fact that you terrify her so nearly validates your slaughter in his mind."

"Look, I know what my wolves did to her...and I apologize. It's not something I can take back, however, and...it wasn't personal. No one has anything against her."

"I am well aware. As I said, I shall attempt to deflect Sesshoumaru. You may wish to steer clear of him for a time, however. I will arrange for you to speak with him in the future after things settle down so this matter can be discussed calmly. Your pack will be performing an important service to us in addition to being under my direct protection in turn, and I shall not have my son behaving inappropriately. So for now, I bid you good day, Prince Kouga."

"My Lord." Kouga bowed and headed back into his room, feeling much relieved despite the fact that the matter wasn't over yet.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Kaaa..." Sairex muttered sleepily. The rap at the door came again. "Fine, fine, I'm up....Nn. Who is it and vhat do you need?"

"May I come in?"

Sairex blinked. "Kaa, of course, my Lord. I'd get da door for you, but I'd probably kill myzelf trying to find it. I'm not very good at being blind just yet."

Toga entered the room and shut the door behind him. "Ah, your mate is not here?"

Sairex blushed deeply. "Er...vell, he's not...I mean...he is but....but not...mrr."

The taiyoukai blinked. "Ah. So it's unofficial then. Very well. I needed to speak with you anyhow."

The raven was glad for the subject change. "Of course. Vhat can I do for you?"

"Do you know of a Jormandar?"

The raven frowned, any trace of good humor vanishing from his features. "My lord...ztay avay from dat one. I mean it...no good can come from it."

"Be that as it may, he came here. We fought."

Sairex gasped. "Vhat?!"

Toga's lips pulled back and a low snarl escaped him at the memory. "He was after my Sesshoumaru and was QUITE put out when he realized he mistook me for him."

"Dan ve ztill have zome time. No vonder he vanted me out of da vay, I could have zensed his damn zpell-vebs." Sairex hissed in frustration. "Vhy vas he after Zezzhoumaru?..."

"Revenge, most likely. It seems my pup refused his advances during his captivity...with his claws. This Jormandar is quite disfigured and torn." Toga had a smug note of pride in his voice. Sairex smirked slightly at the thought of the arrogant circle-demon and how being rendered TRULY repulsive would anger him.

"It is zafe to assume he vill return. Jormander is a..." Sairex paused, sifting through words in his mind. "Vell...tink of him like a puppet-master. He veaves a complicated veb of magic. It is very zpecific, tailored to one person and one person only. The casting is draining and takes a long time, and if anyting goes wrong, it has to be done over. If da intended target is caught in dis spell-veb, dey lose control of deir body. Jormander can control dem, make dem do vhatever he pleases. Dey vill be conscious, but unable to resist vhen he decides to...pull deir proverbial ztrings."

Toga growled viciously enough that Sairex actually took a step back in alarm, even though he knew it wasn't directed at him. This demon-freak would DARE to try and ... POSSESS his Sesshoumaru? His voice was tight and clipped with rage. "Thank you, Sairex."

"My Lord...do not do anyting foolish. It is unlikely I can revive you again...it took a lot more from me dan I vanted to admit in front of Miroku."

"I know. I do not exactly know how much you sacrificed, but I was a soul at the time of your casting. I know it cost you some of yourself. I could see it being consumed. It is not a sacrifice you should have made for me."

"I owe your zons my life and my freedom. I vas more dan villing. Besides, my Lord...dey need you. I am an old bird, despite my good looks. I've lived one hell of a life."

"And you're so modest, too. But for that matter, I've had my share of living too, your age hardly makes your life worth any less than mine."

"But dey need you. Miroku vants me, but he could have gotten by vithout me had I lost my zoul. Zezzhoumaru needs you especially. You are his only alpha....others care, but he vill never let dem protect him . Dey vill love him, dey can care for him...and he vill cherish it even if it is in zilence...but he vill not...can not....let dem protect him and take care of him, make him feel zafe. And he needs dat too, if he's going to heal properly. But, all is vell regardless. I didn't lose all my zoul."

Toga smiled slightly and then pulled the startled raven into a brief hug. "I know. And I do owe you much, though I believe you might just be slightly crazy."

"Only zlightly? I have to try harder, den."

Toga chuckled. "Now rest. I will keep you informed and come to you before I make any rash decisions or run off to take on the entire damn Black Circle myself."

"YOU zhould be resting too. I know how veak you are despite how vell you might hide it. Your body consumed much of itself to exist again, fully fleshed."

"I am painfully aware of that. But I am better than I was already."

"Of course you are. You vill continue to heal rapidly. Now get out of my room, kaa! I have one hell of a headache. Remind me not to devise any damn mind-poisons and let dem be used against me in da future."

"Duly noted. Take care, my friend." Toga smiled and gave the raven a pat on the shoulder before heading out of the room, turning his mind to the task at hand.

Talking Sesshoumaru out of making a wolf-skin rug would be...quite a feat.


	45. Chapter 44

Pride (In the Name of Love) 44 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I think I got carried away....oh well. ^^

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Toga glanced around before leaning against the wall, casually watching Sesshoumaru brushing out his hair. "How is Lady Rin?"

"She is resting. I convinced her that no wolves would be coming anywhere near her for the time being. It seems her ... reaction... drained her energy."

"Well, as far at the wolves go...there is but one at present."

Sesshoumaru turned and narrowed his eyes slightly. "Why are there any? And what do you mean, 'at present'?"

"My son, we are not at war with the various wolf tribes. In fact, we are strong allies with more than one of them...as you should well know. The Prince of the Northern Tribe is here at your brother's request."

Sesshoumaru frowned darkly. "It WOULD be the same tribe..."

"You will treat him with due respect. His pack will be joining him shortly. They are the new castle guard."

"What?!" Sesshoumaru leapt to his feet in disbelief. "What di...How?"

"It seems your brother and the wolf prince are friends. He hired them. As acting Lord, it is within his rights to do so."

Sesshoumaru growled softly, though he snapped it off abruptly at the warning look his father gave him.

"As they are sworn into our service, thus are they under the protection of our House, my Sesshoumaru. They will be treated accordingly and will act accordingly. Your ward is in no danger and has no cause to fear them."

Sesshoumaru bit back a bitter sigh. He knew he was being irrational. His father was right. The wolf tribes had been long-time allies of the West, and having them serving in the castle would increase their own power and standing significantly. It was a wonderful play by his brother in all ways, military and political...but he couldn't get over the tight knot of anger in his chest remembering that it was those same wolves that had killed his Rin.

"You will need to speak with their Prince soon so he understands that you will not be acting contrary to the interests of his continued survival."

Sesshoumaru nodded tightly. "I need to speak with my brother first." Toga nodded.

"As you will. I believe I will rest for a while...I am tired."

"Sleep well, my Lord Father." With a slight bow, Sesshoumaru slid out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha and Miroku both jumped at Sesshoumaru's voice. His words were snapped out sharply, like the cracking of a whip.

"Inuyasha, this Sesshoumaru would speak to you."

"Er...I suppose I better get back to my room and see if Sairex needs anything. He isn't getting along very well with being blind." Miroku grinned, clapped Inuyasha on the shoulder, and beat a hasty retreat.

Inuyasha eyed his brother. Sesshoumaru looked....fairly angry. "Er...what is it?"

"I will first let you know I am most displeased by your involvement of these wolves without warning. You terrified my Rin."

Inuyasha frowned, looking somewhat guilty. "I'm sorry about that, Sessh...it happened so long ago and I saw so much of them since then that I forgot. But you don't have anything to worry about. Kouga can be an ass, but so can you. You should get along great."

Sesshoumaru gave Inuyasha a dark glare, and the hanyou smirked.

"Well, what else do ya got for me?"

"You will..." Sesshoumaru paused and cleared his throat, starting over. He spoke slowly, as if it were somewhat difficult for him to force the words out. "Will you...advise this Sesshoumaru in a matter?"

Inuyasha almost fell over in shock. Sesshoumaru, coming to HIM for advice? Surely the world was ending! "You...you're coming to ME to...yeah, sure, Sessh. What's up? What do you need?"

Sesshoumaru's voice dropped to a scathing, bitingly acidic tone. "Of course I'm coming to you, this mess is all your damn fault in the first place!"

"Um...what...mess in particular are we referring to here?"

Sesshoumaru's tone dropped back to neutral and he stared at a point on the wall. He was rather pleased that he was able to speak without blushing. "I believe my Lord Father is physically attracted to me and wishes to act on it."

Inuyasha paused. "Well, wh....Hey, wait a second! How in the FUCK is that MY fault?!" Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he glared at his brother.

Sesshoumaru glared right back at him. "You were the one that felt the need to make me feel things that were better left forgotten and now I can't just ignore it so this is all YOUR fault!"

Inuyasha blinked and then burst out laughing. "Oh, so you're sayin' that now that you've been forced to admit you have hormones, you've got the hots for the old man?" This struck the hanyou as terribly funny, although he had the good sense to drop THAT particular taunt at the very low and deadly response from Sesshoumaru.

"Whatever else you may or may not insinuate, Inuyasha, you will NOT disrespect our Lord Father in my presence."

"Alright, alright. I'm sorry. Ok, I'll be serious here. I know how hard it must have been for you to ask me of all people for help, so I'll do what I can. Um. What made you think that...er...our father wants to pounce on you?"

"He said so."

"Oh. Er. Well. Guess that doesn't leave a lot of room for misinterpretation..." Inuyasha grinned slightly. // Not that, y'know, the kiss I stumbled onto the other day left a lot of room for doubt either... but he actually flat out said it? To the point. I see where Sessh gets it from. // "Well...um....how does that make you feel?"

Sesshoumaru growled in sheer frustration. "I...I do not know. I cannot understand...I...am confused."

Inuyasha smiled. "Well, that parts easy enough. You're dead sexy. And you were always close to him, you're both alone...what's wrong with taking comfort with one another and enjoying yourself?"

"Because....I...it..."

"We did."

"But that's different!"

Inuyasha arched an eyebrow. "Oh? How so?" It was VERY difficult for him to keep a straight face. He wasn't used to seeing Sesshoumaru, always so calm and collected, stuttering and rather flustered.

"Because..." Sesshoumaru couldn't provide a reason, though he very much wanted to. "It just is."

"It's no different than you messing around with me. I'm pretty new to this demon culture thing, but they seem a bit more open minded than humans when it comes to...well, y'know."

"Incest?...hn. It is not so taboo but neither is it openly promoted. Especially for someone in our positions. As a Lord of the House, I am expected to ultimately mate with someone from another House to strengthen alliances. It is not such a terrible thing, there are many to choose from and chances are I might even like one of them."

"I'm not sure if I can see you so willingly picking Random Lord or Lady and mating with them as a political move. You despise almost all of them and couldn't stand to be around them. And c'mon, Sessh, you know you'd be kidding BOTH of us if you thought for even a split second our father gives a blue bloody fuck about what people think about who he chooses to mate with...and no one would EVER confront him about it."

Sesshoumaru muttered to himself. "Thanks for destroying my arguments. Now I no longer have any idea what to do or how to feel on the matter."

"Well, it's simple. Do whatever feels right at the time, its the only way to be true to yourself...and nothing is as important as that. Just be honest with yourself. If it feels good, let it feel good. You don't need to be guilty. You are who you are, its as simple as that. If people don't like it, fuck 'em, who cares what they think? You're the one that has to live with yourself."

"Eloquent as always, although I concede you have a valid point. Of course, your theory is flawed...just because it is enjoyable, one should not simply do whatever they please."

"Well, no shit. You have to apply a little common sense, but still...you know what I meant."

"Yes." Sesshoumaru paused, thinking for a moment. "Thank you."

"Eh, you're wel--mmrph!" Inuyasha was cut off with a muffled noise of surprise as Sesshoumaru pulled him into an almost brutal kiss. Nearly as soon as it had begun, however, the taiyoukai released him. Smirking, Sesshoumaru sauntered off down the hall, leaving a dazed Inuyasha staring off after him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kouga blinked at the sharp rap on his door but didn't think much of it. He opened it and almost yelped when Sesshoumaru strode into the room and stood directly in front of him, his features expressionless. The wolf swallowed hard and did his best to keep his own expression level, although he was waiting to be painfully destroyed at any moment.

"Wolf."

"Hello, Sesshoumaru..."

"Lord...Sesshoumaru."

Kouga bit back a scowl, his tail bristling. However, since he WAS serving the Inu no Taisho's House now... "Sorry. I'm not used to it."

"...I accept your service, but on the morrow, you will do a thing for me. It is not a request, it is a demand. Should you fail to comply, contract or no, I will at the least remove you forcibly from these walls, possibly kill you. Am I very clear?"

"What's this...thing?"

"In the morning you will come with this Sesshoumaru to speak to my ward, Rin, whom your wolves killed. You will personally apologize for that and assure her that it will not happen again. Indeed, you will assure her you and your wolves are here to protect her from any potential future harm...and you WILL mean it."

Kouga was surprised. "Well...yeah, I can do that. No problem. You have my word."

"Good. I will be by at sunrise." With that, Sesshoumaru turned and strode off. Kouga sank back, relieved. If all it took to earn Sesshoumaru's acceptance was an apology and an oath of protection he was bound by already anyways...well...maybe luck was with him after all.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sairex...what ARE you doing...?"

"Resting."

Miroku hiked his eyebrows. The raven was hopelessly tangled in the curtains, which had been torn from the windows, and was laying in a heap on the ground, largely incapacitated.

"It seems the curtains won."

"Nah. I'm lulling dem into a false zense of zecurity, den I zhall make my move. I'm crafty like dat."

Miroku chuckled and crouched down next to Sairex. It took a bit of doing, but he eventually managed to free his lover from the long silken draperies. "Do I even want to know how this happened?"

"Vell...I VAS going to get zometing to eat. Tings vere going vell enough but my ving caught on da curtain...I vent to move it, da curtain vas clingy...er....zoon it vas an epic battle and I tink dey von."

"Aww...well, if its any consolation, Inuyasha is taking his friend Kouga tomorrow morning and they'll get you your dragon heart. Then we can get you fixed up."

Sairex smiled and then leaned over, finding Miroku by touch and knocking the monk flat on his back, pinning him with a triumphant grin. "You're too good to me."

Miroku smiled. "Anything for the one I love."

Sairex paused, his expression serious for a long moment. When he spoke, his voice was soft. "It is very dangerous to love me, Miroku..."

"You're worth any risk, and I am neither weak nor afraid."

The raven smiled, a slight blush tinging his cheeks. "Even if I vanted to deny it, I can't. I love you too."

Miroku grinned and pulled Sairex into a kiss. "Good. Then let me take care of you for now....there's no need for you to fight draperies. I'll go get lunch and then take you out to the garden to enjoy it, since it's a beautiful warm day...then we can go to the hot springs for a nice, relaxing bath...then I will bring you back here and give you a massage before thoroughly ravishing you for the rest of the night."

Sairex chuckled. "Hmm, you drive a hard bargain...da curtain VAS rather entertaining..."

Miroku smirked and trailed a finger over the arch of Sairex's wing as he leaned up to nibble gently at his ear. "You still owe me a week of serving my every whim...I won the bet..."

"It vas hardly fair, you von before we even began and ve both know it...but I'll be more dan pleased to....zee to your needs."

"Well, lets get you some lunch first...you'll need to keep your strength up." Miroku disentangled himself from his lover and stood up before escorting him from the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga found his youngest pup in the throne room, attempting to balance Tetsusaiga on one fingertip and looking horribly bored and lost in thought. When he noticed his father, he almost dropped the blade in his haste to put it away, flashing Toga a grin. "Hey!"

"Well hello. You look terribly excited."

"Meh...No problems, don't have anything to do until tomorrow morning. Though I DID just have a terribly...interesting...talk with my brother."

Toga's eyes immediately locked on Inuyasha's. "Oh...?"

Inuyasha smirked slightly. "Mm. Yeah.."

"I'm assuming he mentioned me."

"Yeah. Although, interestingly enough, everything that does or does not happen between you is my fault."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "How?"

"Well, you see, since I forced him to recognize that he is not above feeling things like lust and desire and whatnot, instead of being able to completely ignore you he has to deal with the fact that you being all hot and bothered makes him all hot and bothered."

"I never said I was hot or bothered..." Toga mumbled. "I can keep control of myself." Inwardly, he was beginning to doubt that.

"God, you two are a pair. So worried about your self control and doing whats right."

"Well...its gotten me to where I am in life."

"And right now you're frustrated and needlessly guilty. If that's right, maybe you need to try a little wrong. Don't worry...whatever you see in Sessh? I've seen it too. Difference is, I acted on it." Inuyasha smirked. "I always act on my feelings. Sometimes it gets me in trouble, but....I live a full life because of it. Although...I might make you share him on occasion."

"This is a highly inappropriate conversation..." Toga mumbled, fighting the urge to blush, amazed at his pup's openness.

"Who is there that will dare say what you choose is wrong?" And for that, Toga had no answer.


	46. Chapter 45

Pride (In the Name of Love) 45 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Time to check in and see what the baddies are up to....surely they aren't simply sitting on their laurels waiting patiently. Bwahahaha!

Over 100,000 words now. o.O...and the next chapter will put me over 200 pages (10pt font) in my MS Word clone. I think this may be the longest story I've ever written by myself. I'm fairly pleased.

I feel vaguely guilty to all my reviewers on mediaminer and AFF! I enjoy personally responding to reviews but don't like clogging up lots of story-posting-space to do so. I can personally respond to my FFnet peoples. So...this is just a note to let you know that I *DO* read all your reviews and I absolutely love them. They are what make me keep writing. I wake up every night all excited to read my new ones. I DO consider questions, I will consider suggestions if made, etc.

I love you all, and you make this project worth my while.

I want you all to know I tried reeeeeally hard to make the end of this chapter...good? But is sleepy time, I'm late (I'm sure some of my earlier readers have noticed) and I was drifting off...when I drift off, I tend to repeat words. So I apologize if I did so. Lol...I'm too tired to do a thorough beta.

So without further ado...

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"My lord...she has arrived."

"Good, bring her in." Jormandar sat forward eagerly as the doors opened to admit the female youkai. She gave him her usual disdainful look, her eyes frigid shards of pale yellow ice. "Ah, my Lady...I am pleased to see you. I trust things are well underway and you received the necessary supplies?"

She nodded once in response.

"Very good. Do you have any idea how many innocents it takes to fill a pool that size?"

Her pale eyes narrowed into a suspicious glare. Jormandar hastily held up his bony hands in a placating gesture.

"I assure you, the ritual testing was performed before a single drop of blood was spilled from any. It is too important to me that this succeeds, and there can be no second chance. I will not allow something so foolish as impatience to damage your spellcasting, Lady."

The sorceress relaxed minutely, apparently satisfied with his response.

"Are you sure, Lady, that you do not wish to renegotiate your price? It seems such a trivial thing. You know as well as I that performing this task for me forces your hand. You will not be able to remain hidden."

She shook her head once in negation - no, she was uninterested in re-negotiating.

Jormandar shrugged. "Very well. Then I shall answer the question you posed me. The answer is yes."

Her lips slowly curved up in a cold smile. She was pleased.

"Everything else will remain at status quo. You will continue to receive your tribute of slaves every week, and will continue to receive my assistance in gathering the things you need. Let me know when the ritual is complete. I am most impatient."

The sorceress nodded once.

"Have you considered my proposal? Please, do not look at me so coldly, Lady...we would be a good match and produce a powerful heir. You are coming out of the shadows and thus keeping you hidden is no longer necessary."

Finally, the sorceress spoke. She formed her words slowly and carefully, her accent thick and heavy - this was not a tongue she spoke often and the words came awkwardly to her perfect, sensual lips. "I am prepared for one and one only. It is not you and I will not ruin all my effort."

Jormandar sighed. She was so cold and brutal, so wicked and evil and damned beautiful...she was perfect. "Very well, my dear Karalichala...inform me of your progress."

The sorceress nodded and then turned, striding from the room without another word.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The sorceress eyed the pool, pleased. It was a massive bowl carved into the rock, carefully lined and sealed. The pool was filled with blood, the blood of pure-hearted innocents. Submerged in the pool were the remains of a massive beast, the bones still covered with rotted, putrescent bits of flesh.

Karalichala walked to the edge of the pool, withdrawing a small, hooked dagger from one of her voluminous sleeves. She murmured softly in her native tongue and then slashed the blade across her palm, making a tiny cut and continuing her chant. She allowed a single drop of her blood to fall to the pool at her feet.

A heaving ripple went through the thick crimson liquid and soon it began to bubble. She stepped back, closing her palm and smirking. The pool was at a rapid boil a few moments later.

Karalichala nodded and set to making other plans. Soon, she would make the move that would destroy her or set her free of the only enemy that knew how to oppose her. Perhaps as early as tomorrow. She had waited so long, prepared herself so carefully...and her window of opportunity was shrinking. Not that it had been very large to begin with. She would have to work fast.

Yes, tomorrow night...

Her cold, pale eyes glanced back towards the pool. They settled on the horribly toothy skull bobbing near the surface, buoyed up from the force of the rapidly boiling blood. She did not know what it was Jormandar wanted with Tsetsukosei, but she really didn't care. Her role in that was nearly finished.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was feeling rather pleased with himself. He had had an eventful day and taken care of several issues, even dealt with the wolf prince. If Kouga did as he said come morning, then, depending on Rin's reaction, he would either be at peace with the wolves' presence or be forced to take more drastic measures. However, as long as it was portrayed to Rin in a positive light...things should go fairly smoothly.

Then there was that whole scene with his brother...Inuyasha had an interesting way of looking at life, that was for sure. Sesshoumaru liked to think he had come out on top of that conversation - no way had Inuyasha expected to be kissed, judging by the abruptly dazed look he had left the hanyou with.

In fact, despite what he had said, Sesshoumaru couldn't really deny that he had thoroughly enjoyed his experiences with Inuyasha of late. Admittedly, a lot of it confused his senses and was simply outside of the scope of the world he usually operated in, but that didn't make it BAD. He knew without a shadow of a doubt that he'd never again be able to completely keep physical lust and desire from his life now that he had experienced it. He assumed it was probably a good thing, although he did wonder where his brother had learned so much. Perhaps there was more to his relationship with the wolf than he had first suspected. It would be interesting to find out. Interesting, too, to find out what other things his brother might be able to show him...

That still left the biggest question, though. What to do about the other, infinitely more confusing male in his life?

He respected his father more than any other creature, alive or dead. He downright revered him. He was everything Sesshoumaru had ever aspired to be and then some. He was the epitome of grace, power, and intelligence.

Further, he had Sesshoumaru's trust, which was a thing virtually no other could claim. His father would lay down his life for his own in a heartbeat. Sesshoumaru was used to being strong and capable on his own...but he could relax and let down his guard around Toga and still feel safe, protected. At least part of that stemmed, he knew, from the fact that his father was the alpha male of the family, the only alpha male that would ever be part of Sesshoumaru's life. He knew beyond doubt he would never concede his own alpha status to any other. It was strange to submit to anyone, but in his father's case, it felt...right.

And with his father, he did not have to be anyone he was not, he did not have to put on airs. He was simply Sesshoumaru. His father knew all there was to know about him. He knew what had motivated him in almost every facet of his life. He could simply be Sesshoumaru, with no pressures or consequences, and his father would still love him unconditionally. No matter what he was to anyone else, he would always be Toga's pup.

Of course, this newly forming facet of their relationship was difficult for Sesshoumaru to deal with. He wasn't sure how he felt about it. He was, even if he'd never admit it, terribly flattered that someone he idolized and practically worshiped would take such a strong interest in him. And he also knew, too, that any interest Toga took in him was bereft of any of the ties and hidden traps that came with almost all others. Toga was interested in HIM, not anything he had or could do. In fact, with as much insight as Toga had had in his life, it was fairly safe to say that he was more interested in the real Sesshoumaru without any of the trappings than anyone else ever could be. Even Inuyasha, who cared about him for himself, couldn't know him quite so deeply. Their relationship was too new.

And he could admit that his father was incredibly attractive. The incestual aspect of it really didn't bother Sesshoumaru too much. Sure, more than a few eligible maidens might lament the fact that two of the world's most desirable males had been removed from the running, but...Sesshoumaru couldn't possibly care less and he doubted Toga did either.

So what was the problem?

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily. He knew that HE was the problem in many ways. Any time he tried to think very far along the lines of romance, something in his mind balked and the nightmares of his torture sprang back to the fore. Logically he knew THAT was foolish - his father loved him and would never do anything to hurt him. However, logic rarely played a role in emotion.

Then there was the simple fact that...well. He had never been in a relationship on that sort of level, and one of the things Sesshoumaru had feared all his life was failure. What if he was terrible at it? It certainly wouldn't do to be terrible at it with someone whose opinion he valued so much... Sesshoumaru couldn't stomach even the thought of his father looking down on him for any reason, being disappointed in any way.

Sesshoumaru sighed. No, there was no easy answer to this. However, he would have to deal with things regardless. After all, his father had no intention of allowing him out of his sight during the night. The thought made Sesshoumaru slightly guilty...but then again, if he had a nightmare when he was alone, who knew what he could end up doing to himself or someone else? It was probably better to be safe than sorry.

Besides, Toga was good at calming him down, he had already proven that much. He always had been.

Hesitantly, Sesshoumaru opened the door and peeked into the room. Toga was already stretched out in bed, although he had propped himself up with his mokomokos and was idly flipping through a book instead of sleeping. He glanced up and smiled when he saw Sesshoumaru enter. "Ah. I was wondering when you would arrive."

"I had matters to attend to."

"Of course."

Sesshoumaru changed into his sleeping pants before laying down with a yawn. "I spoke with the wolf."

"Oh? How did that go?"

"He will be apologizing to Rin in the morning."

"Very good. Will you be going on the quest? I believe I may join your brother and his wolf friend."

"Quest?" Sesshoumaru propped himself up on his elbow to peer at his father.

"Ah. Yes, it seems our advisor needs a dragon-youkai's heart for his antidote. Your brother and Prince Kouga are going tomorrow, I was invited."

"Mm..." Sesshoumaru considered it for a few moments. "This Sesshoumaru has other things to do. I must make sure Rin is adapting to having the wolves here. Between the three of you, you will surely be more than a match for any dragon anyways, you'd hardly need me."

Toga chuckled. "Fair enough. I need to spend some more time with your brother anyways. He has a very...er...interesting outlook on life."

Sesshoumaru flushed slightly. "Ah. You spoke with him too then..."

"Indeed. And it made me think a good deal. I have exhibited a surprising lack of control of late."

"It is alright."

"No, my Sesshoumaru, it is not." Toga sighed and curled his arms around Sesshoumaru, pulling him close and resting his chin on Sesshoumaru's head. "I want you to know that you do not have to worry. I will not take advantage of you. I do not wish for you to be uncomfortable in any way, and will in no way be upset if you refuse me anything."

"This...leads me to believe that you do indeed intend to pursue me," Sesshoumaru murmured softly, aware that he was blushing and that his heart was beating a bit faster.

"Even if it is wrong of me, I will not lie to myself nor deny my attraction to you. If you wish for me to stop, I will, but otherwise...I wish to be closer to y ou than I am even now."

Sesshoumaru pulled back enough to look Toga in the eyes, swallowing at the intense but loving gaze directed his way.

Toga's voice was soft as he spoke, idly brushing a few rogue strands of silvery hair from Sesshoumaru's face, trailing his thumb lightly over the crimson slashes on his cheek. "May I kiss you?"

Sesshoumaru found he couldn't speak but managed a small nod. Toga smiled and leaned in, capturing Sesshoumaru's lips with his own. The kiss was soft and gentle, never pushing, but still deliciously deliberate and thorough. Sesshoumaru's eyelashes fluttered shut and he felt a warm heat pouring into his belly. He felt arms slowly slip more tightly around him as Toga gently sucked on his lower lip, teasing it with his tongue. It took very little coaxing for Sesshoumaru to open to him.

Toga purred his contentment despite the guilty little voice in the back of his head. // Oh, his mother would kill me... // The thought was fleeting, however...thinking was not coming easily to him right now. He was slightly surprised - but didn't protest and was far from displeased - when Sesshoumaru's fingers slid through his hair and pulled him in tighter, deepening the kiss. The younger taiyoukai's tongue slid out to wage a small war with his own as Sesshoumaru moved to do a little of his own exploring.

Sesshoumaru had never known something so simple as a kiss could feel so overwhelming. It was intoxicating, spellbinding... the warmth that spread through him and flooded his veins was comforting and earth-shaking all at once. Sesshoumaru felt as if he had been shattered ever so slowly and then put back together in a more perfect way, that somehow through this he had been remade into something destined for a bliss to make nirvana pale. It was definitely an intimate act...he could feel the coils of lust deep in the recesses of his soul...but they were content to remain where they were. This was so much more than a prelude to something sexual. It was far beyond mere words, a binding, an expression of deep love.

The kiss seemed endless and too short all at the same time. They only paused after several minutes, when the need for air finally intruded over the need to continue the warm and wholly wondrous kiss. Sesshoumaru's eyes half opened, although his expression was dazed. His lips were reddened and slightly swollen, his cheeks flushed. Toga imagined he couldn't look much different at the moment himself.

With a rumbling, blissful purr he snuggled his pup against his chest. "Goodnight, my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru managed a small 'Mm..' of agreement, a faint smile twitching his lips.

There were no nightmares this night.


	47. Chapter 46

Pride (In the Name of Love) 46 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Um...this chapter has happy-amusing and sickly-dark-evil. All in one. The plot thickens, as it were.

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Kouga's faithful lieutenants, Ginta and Hakkaku, arrived just before dawn to inform him that the pack was on its way. Kouga thanked them for the message and showed them to the rooms Inuyasha had told him were designated for his pack.

The wolf prince finished getting dressed and prepared for his dragon-hunt. Just as the sun appeared over the horizon, there was a sharp rap on his door. Kouga had no doubt it was Sesshoumaru, punctual as always. He greeted the taiyoukai with a polite nod.

"You will come with this Sesshoumaru to Rin's room. I intend to introduce her to you. Please remain outside her door until I call you in."

"Yeah, sure. Don't worry, I have no intention of scaring the kid."

"You best not."

Sesshoumaru led Kouga to Rin's room and quietly entered. "Rin."

Rin blinked her eyes open slowly and sat up. "Lord Sesshoumaru?" She yawned sleepily.

"Rin. I have not seen you much as of late and am taking the day to spend time with you. I wish to learn more of the things you brought from the miko's time."

Rin lit up and beamed at him. Sesshoumaru was taking a whole day just for her!

"But I do need you to do something for me."

"Of course, Sesshoumaru-sama. What do you need?"

"I have someone for you to meet. He is the prince of the wolf demons. You need not fear him or his pack. You will see that he is just like the rest of us. And he is my brother's...friend. You know Inuyasha would not wish you harm."

Rin swallowed hard, but managed a tiny nod. Sesshoumaru signaled by the door and Kouga came into the room. The girl tried hard to be brave like Sesshoumaru wanted, but couldn't help clutching her blanket tightly and staring wide-eyed at the wolf prince.

Kouga walked over slowly towards her and then took a knee, bowing his head politely. "Lady Rin, it is a pleasure to meet you in person. I am Kouga, Prince of the Northern Wolf Tribe."

"Rin is happy to meet you..." Rin managed, offering Kouga a feeble smile.

Kouga flashed her his most charming grin. "I came to apologize for what happened before. My wolves were very bad, and I promise that they'll be on their best behavior from now on."

Rin nodded and her smile grew a bit - now that she was talking to Kouga, he certainly seemed to be...alright. He was nowhere near as scary as she had thought he would be. He really was a lot like the other nice demons she knew. "So...you are a wolf demon?"

The wolf prince nodded and flashed her a grin. "Yep. We're a lot like these dog demons you hang out with..." Here he leaned in conspiratorily. "But better."

Sesshoumaru arched an eyebrow. "Hn. You wish, wolf."

"Pfft. There are lots of things wolves do better than dogs. Hell, I bet half of us wolves can do dog things better than you dogs." Kouga winked at Rin to show he was teasing.

Rin blinked. Dog things? Wolves were better...? What sort of things did dogs do well? "Can you play fetch?" she asked hesitantly.

"Probably better than any of your dog friends." Kouga smirked. "When was the last time you saw Lord Sesshoumaru here chase a stick, eh?"

Rin blinked, then gasped in shock. She had NEVER seen her lord chase a stick! Was it true then?

Sesshoumaru stared at Kouga as if trying to melt him with his eyes. "If I were so inclined to run after a tossed tree limb.." Here he paused. For some reason that he couldn't fathom, the idea seemed to appeal to him on some base, instinctual level. With a dark mental scowl, he kicked that thought into a corner. "I could do it far better than you could, wolf."

Rin was reassured. If Sesshoumaru said he could do it, then Kouga was simply wrong and that was all there was to it. But her smile now was genuine - Kouga seemed friendly enough, and Sesshoumaru had said he was ok...so perhaps wolves weren't so bad after all. And Kouga HAD promised they would all be good.

Kouga chuckled. "Keep telling yourself that, my lord."

Sesshoumaru glanced at Rin, then growled in response. "Wolf...I knew I should have gotten rid of you..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha found his father standing stock-still in the garden, staring in bewilderment at something going on across the way. "Hey...what's up?"

Toga's tone was that of someone who had just had the foundation of his world and all he believed to be good and true shaken up and turned upside down. "Come look at this."

Inuyasha blinked, somewhat concerned, then peered across the courtyard to see what his father was staring at. His own eyes went wide and he stared slack-jawed. "Is that..."

"Are they..."

"But...."

Both of them watched, flabbergasted, at the scene unfolding before them. Rin was sitting on the edge of a fountain next to Hakkaku. Ginta was looking between Sesshoumaru and Kouga before hauling back his arm and letting fly...a stick.

The stick shot out across the courtyard. Sesshoumaru and Kouga spared each other a glance, growling, before taking off after it. Rin started cheering for Sesshoumaru, and Hakkaku was cheering on Kouga. As 'moderator' of the stick-chasing contest, Ginta kept his mouth shut.

Sesshoumaru was fast, but Kouga proved the faster. He leapt into the air, intent on snagging his wooden prize, when a sizzling crack erupted directly in front of him. Sesshoumaru's light whip coiled around the stick and snagged it out of the air, hauling it to the triumphant taiyoukai's hand. Kouga yelped, barely avoiding contact with the glowing lash. Rin cheered happily, clapping.

"That was cheating!" Kouga growled angrily, tail lashing.

"This Sesshoumaru does not cheat. If you are allowed the use of your demonic powers of unnatural speed, I too should be allowed my natural talents. The stick is mine."

"Gimme that stick! I had it fair and square!"

"No."

"I challenge you to a rematch! No tricks this time."

"Very well. I will enjoy trouncing you a second time."

Toga rubbed the back of his neck slowly, trying to reconcile the fact that yes, his eldest pup, his Sesshoumaru, was chasing a stick through his garden with a wolf. Inuyasha slumped back against the wall in disbelief. He had seen some strange things in his day, sure....but this?

A slow, impish grin spread across the elder taiyoukai's face as he watched Sesshoumaru and Kouga retake their positions.

Ginta made sure the two contestants were ready before whipping the stick again. Sesshoumaru and Kouga both took off.

A blur of white suddenly shot between them, snatching the stick from the air before either of them could touch it.

Toga landed well ahead of them from his leap and sat back on his haunches - he was in his true form - tail swishing back and forth and his prize in his jaws. Kouga simply stared and Sesshoumaru blinked before slowly and progressively turning almost every shade of red in the visible spectrum. Inuyasha walked over with a chuckle, throwing an arm around the shoulders of each of the former contestants.

"Well, I for one am TERRIBLY interested in hearing the story behind this..."

"Don't you have a dragon to be hunting?" Sesshoumaru muttered with a scowl, ducking Inuyasha's arm and hurrying over to Rin. "Come, Rin."

Rin waved as she was hastily escorted back inside.

Inuyasha burst out laughing and Kouga blushed, jerking away from the hanyou.

Toga dropped the stick and assumed his humanoid form, trying not to laugh himself. "I'm sure your friend will enlighten us on the way. It may take a while for us to find a suitable dragon youkai, we should get on with things."

Kouga agreed gratefully and the three of them set off on their search.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"It is done?"

Karalichala sneered at Jormandar and beckoned for him to follow her. She pointed to the pool. Much of the blood had boiled away, leaving the bare bones of Tsetsukosei's skeleton. With a low murmur, the sorceress pressed a small red gem to the center of the beast's skull.

With a great groaning and creaking, the dragon skeleton took to its feet.

"He lives?"

Karalichala shook her head. The skeleton was animated by her will - it was easier than dragging the massive thing about. She closed her eyes, smirking slightly at Jormandar's pained hiss a moment later. The red gem flared blindingly. The thick reddish-brown substance left behind in the bottom of the pool began to slither up the skeletal frame, oozing around bones, forming a gooey network of tendon and muscle.

The dragon did not move further.

Karalichala looked to Jormandar before speaking. "I need a few items to complete it before I can recall and bind it's essence."

Jormandar smiled wickedly. "It shall be done immediately, let my minion know what you require."

"I depart for my own ends. I return tomorrow."

Jormandar scowled. "And if you fail, if you are discovered? You will be destroyed."

Karalichala smirked. She cared little what happened to Jormandar or his plots should she be killed. The sorceress turned her back to Jormandar and then was gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Karalichala had to wait out the better part of the day, but gaining entry was easier than she had expected. The guard was light, almost nonexistent. She did not question her good fortune in this and simply insinuated herself into the walls of the building itself, flowing like smoke through stone, mortar, and wood.

She came from the floor, melting slowly into the room. Her movements were precise and efficient. It was a matter of only a few moments to inject the sleeping male with the paralytic poison she'd brought. It took effect almost instantly. Startled, sleepy eyes opened, but already he was paralyzed, unable to move, his vocal cords frozen.

Karalichala nodded to herself as she injected a series of unidentified substances into the other sleeping male. Satisfied that was done, she produced a series of heavily spelled chains, lashing him in place. He never woke fully - the drugs were working beautifully. Wide eyes watched every one of Karalichala's movements as the sorceress silently went about her business.

She could not help but smirk as she began pulling the clothing off of her victim. He WAS a beautiful creature, a prime specimen. Yes, the child he would give her would suit her purposes well. She had prepared for this....so many spells to ensure that she would conceive, would not have to so open herself again...and Jormandar had been so confident with his answer. Yes, he had said. Yes. It would work.

It had to.

She disrobed unhurriedly, setting her expensive dress down carefully on a chair. She walked back to her victim and ran her fingers longingly down his lithe frame before curling them around his shaft and stroking him firmly. It didn't take long for his body, lost somewhere in a haze between sleeping and waking, to respond to the stimulation. Satisfied that he was thoroughly aroused, she straddled his hips and thrust herself down on him with a low moan.

She spared a glance for her captive's ...what, mate? lover? close friend?...laying next to them. If looks could kill...yes, it must be his mate. She wondered with sincere amusement what he would do were he free of his paralysis. The sight of her raping his mate looked to be driving him quite mad. Solely to spite the man she raked her talons down his mate's chest, drawing deep bloody lines in his flesh.

She sighed in pleasure, her back arching. Oh, he felt good inside her... she could imagine him being a hell of a lover, but didn't dare risk waking him to find out if that theory was correct. Tears wound down his frustrated, crazed mate's face, but he could do nothing else, make no sound.

Soon the act was done and she sighed blissfully. She remained where she was for a long moment before standing and stretching, then redressing. With an inward sigh, she pulled her small, hooked dagger from her sleeve. Oh, how she wished she were better at divination...it would make things so much simpler.

However, she was a relatively poor hand at it and knew she was as likely to fail as she was to succeed - but it mattered little. She calmly walked over to her paralyzed victim and rolled him so he was flat on his back. When she was satisfied with his positioning, she dug her dagger deeply into his belly and slit him open. She lamented being unable to spare the time to study the stunned pain in his eyes, but she needed to concentrate.

Using the hook of her dagger she slowly began pulling out his internal organs, murmuring the ritual chant and studying them intently. She felt him die, but paid it no heed.

Her face lit up as the answer was revealed to her. So her spells had worked. She had conceived a child from this. Wonderful! It seems Jormandar wasn't entirely useless after all, and his information was good.

Humming softly to herself, she widened the slit and tore the heart free of the corpse. She raised it to her lips and took a bite, feeling the warm, sweet blood pour down her face. Delicious...but his energy was not something she could use. A pity.

She looked back to her bound captive and frowned, considering. She would so love to take him back with her...or kill him. His role in this was done for now. Alas, no. She might have need of him in the future.

Karalichala dropped the heart regretfully and let her body fade out of the room. The blood would soon attract unwelcome attention, and she wished to be long gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru found that he very much enjoyed card games. Too much of this yellow drink Rin referred to as "Mountain Dew" was making him feel unusually...hyper. Despite it getting late, Sesshoumaru felt he could easily stay awake for the next three days! Oh, and this cheesecake was divine...and didn't taste anything like any sort of cheese he knew of. Nor did it look much like a cake. People in Kagome's time surely named things inappropriately.

Rin giggled as she saw Sesshoumaru savoring another bite of his treat. Her lord had more of a sweet tooth than she had thought...of course, the things she had brought WERE inexplicably good. She fumbled with her hand of cards before grinning. It had been a wonderful day, even if Sesshoumaru had been a bit...prickly...after the stick incident.

Sesshoumaru was about to triumphantly proclaim his victory in this latest game when Tenseiga pulsed at his side.


	48. Chapter 47

Pride (In the Name of Love) 47 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - All I could think of as I wrote the last bit of the last chapter, with Sesshy on a sugar-high, was the movie Talladega Nights...."I'm all jacked up on Mountain Dew!" I certainly was. XD

And more of the attack is revealed, as well as some motivations! Bwahahaha! AND...the question Kara asked of Jormandar is probably in here somewhere too.

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The hunt for the dragon had gone better than expected. Between the three of them they easily picked up and picked apart scent trails until they stumbled upon the lair of the beast. Toga chatted and joked with Inuyasha, and soon Kouga joined in.

However, the elder inu was crafty and soon got the two of them to admit to several details of their relationship. It seemed that they acted like rivals, but actually cared relatively deeply for one another and were on-again, off-again mates. The time they spent apart was probably the only thing that kept their relationship from evolving and becoming deeper.

Kouga was grateful for that in one way - as prince of the tribe and their chief Alpha, it was expected of him to produce offspring for the strength of the pack. Even though the leadership of the wolf pack was not hereditary, a strong alpha would produce strong offspring with a good mate, and Kouga could have had his pick of any of the females he desired.

The main problem with that, however, was that any time he attempted to court one of his pack's females, he found himself distracted with thoughts of silver hair and golden eyes, a rough but lightly teasing voice grumbling an insult at him that wasn't meant, a delightful fight for dominance that he lost more often than not... Inevitably, he would find fault with the wolf demoness and stalk off. It would be a long time before he'd make the effort again, until he talked himself into it...and longer still if somewhere in the interim he received any visits from a certain hanyou.

The tribe's elders were immensely pleased to hear of the pack's new position as guards for none other than the legendary Inu no Taisho. Many were skeptical and did not believe he was alive, as Toga had made certain none would know so he would have time to heal fully first...but even serving under the Great Dog General's offspring would provide a huge boost of status and personal clout to the wolf demons, so the elders remained on board with the idea.

Toga hadn't extracted the details about Kouga's reluctance to mate with a she-demon and get an heir, but he could easily enough guess at it from what the wolf-prince DIDN'T say. He had been in the political game for longer than he cared to think himself and understood the pressures that came with being part of the royal family. Inuyasha was not under any sort of unspoken social constraints to produce an heir - even if such an act would have been looked on as favorable - because he was not Toga's heir. Thus the hanyou would be largely free to do as he chose. The fact that he had more or less chosen to mate with the chief of an allied tribe would have been looked upon favorably - such an alliance would bind the two Houses as family rather than just allies. The trick would be getting the elders of Kouga's tribe to consider his cementing an alliance with the House of Inu no Taisho being worth more than producing strong wolf cubs for the pack's benefit.

Inuyasha didn't bother to speak of some aspects of his relationship with the wolf prince. Yes, they were only a step removed from being committed mates. Their relationship still was largely open-ended, however. Kouga had already heard that Inuyasha had been messing around with Sesshoumaru, and he didn't mind. Actually, he found it kind of amusing, especially when the snickering hanyou told him that Sesshoumaru blamed HIM for Toga's interests simply because he had found the 'on' switch for his brother's hormones.

All three of them were drawn from their good-natured jesting and chatter by the sight of the somewhat surprised dragon youkai crawling from its cave. The large beast was surprised that three demons...wait...two demons and a hanyou, why were demons traveling so openly with a filthy halfbreed?...would stumble upon his lair and get so close, idly chatting and alerting him to their presence. The three looked unflustered despite his presence, and that angered the beast.

"I do not usually have my lunch delivered," he rumbled, flexing powerful claws.

Toga snickered and nudged Inuyasha. "He thinks he's going to eat us."

Inuyasha and Kouga both chuckled at that. The dragon huffed and thrust his chest forward angrily, tail lashing. He did NOT like being taunted.

"Insolent curs! I will destroy you all!" The dragon lunged forward and ended up choking on a whirlwind of dirt. By the time the dust had cleared, all three of his intended victims were well out of sight. The youkai growled in frustration. His growl turned into a howl as Tetsusaiga was thrust through the end of his tail and deep into the ground.

The dragon really stood no chance. The three canine youkai taunted it and always stayed well out of its reach as they whittled down its impressive strength, then they attacked in unison, driving through the sluggish beast's thickly armored hide to deliver the killing blow. It actually was more difficult for the three powerful demons to figure out how to cut out the monster's heart - getting to it proved difficult and took almost as much time as finding the dragon was in the first place. It was nearly dark when the three started their trip home.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru frowned darkly as Tenseiga pulsed again. He had felt this before, right before he'd use the blade to resurrect someone nearby. "Rin, stay here. Lock the door and let no one enter before me."

Rin nodded, her eyes widening. Sesshoumaru drew Toukijin and bounded out into the hallway. It didn't take him long to figure out what had happened, a mere few doors from Rin's room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Oh, something was wrong...so very wrong...Sairex struggled mentally to fight against the numbing, deadening of his mind. It was so DIFFICULT being cut off from his magic...but this was different. // Something else...what in all the hells has gone on? //

Slowly the raven struggled to regain consciousness, painfully aware that he had been drugged. But who? Why? For what purpose?

Sesshoumaru burst into the room and skidded to a stop, eyes widening. Sairex was chained down, naked, and unconscious, although he was starting to twitch slightly. Several long, bloody gashes - claw marks? were torn down his chest. Miroku...

The monk had been eviscerated, his insides torn out, his heart cut from his chest. The blood was still fresh - whomever had done this had only just finished. Tenseiga pulsed insistently at his side.

Sesshoumaru wondered if Tenseiga would heal the monk and leave a bunch of extra internal organs laying about or if he should put the monk back together before attempting to revive him. He sheathed Toukijin and drew Tenseiga. Almost immediately, he saw the little soul-harvesting demons working on the monk.

One quick swipe took care of them. Sesshoumaru noted that the mess stayed behind, even though Miroku's injuries closed. In an uncharacteristically generous move, he hurried forward as Miroku's chest suddenly heaved and the monk gasped in a breath, violet eyes snapping open. The taiyoukai plucked Miroku up and set him down in a nearby chair, then swept the bedding - and most of the gore - out from under Sairex, rapidly depositing the bundle in the hallway. He could do nothing about the blood, but at least the rest of it was taken care of.

Miroku was back by Sairex's side almost before Sesshoumaru could turn around, tears streaming down his face. "Oh, god..."

Sairex's eyelashes fluttered open, although it was more habit than anything. He still couldn't see. "Nnn...vhat..."

"Sairex!"

The raven blinked as he was suddenly half covered by sobbing monk. He tried to move his arms but found them stopped short almost immediately by the chains around his wrists. "Eh...? Vhat...is going on?"

"Y...you...don't....know?" Miroku asked, choked.

"Nnn...no....I tink I've been drugged...vhy can't I move? And vhy am I not vearing anyting?"

Sesshoumaru eyed the chains and gave them an experimental tug. They failed to break or open, and resisted his attempt to cut them with Toukijin. Shrugging, he simply sliced through the frame of the bed itself and unhooked the loops - they could deal with removing them later. "If you need me, I shall be in either Rin's room or my own."

Miroku looked down, waging a mental war. He didn't have any idea how to tell this to his lover. He knew Sairex would find out eventually, and it might be better to break the news to him now.

"We....we were attacked last night by a....a woman. She drugged us both. I was paralyzed and had to watch as she...she..." Miroku closed his eyes and held his raven close. "She forced herself on you."

Sairex made an odd, somewhat choked, surprised noise. "Vhat? Vhy vould...I don't understand."

"I don't know why either...but...but I can guess."

Sairex was silent for a long moment. "Alright, I'm vaiting..."

Miroku winced. "She was....she was like you. A raven. Yellow eyes, black wings, the whole works."

"...Impossible. I destroyed dem all. And even if I did zomehow miss one...I damaged myzelf. If her goal vas to bear my child, zhe vill find it quite impossible no matter vhat zhe did to me....but vait. Vhat did zhe do to YOU?"

The monk winced. "She...killed me. But Sesshoumaru resurrected me, so I'm fine now."

Sairex groaned. "I knew dis vould happen! I knew it! My problems follow me and become yours..."

"Do not blame yourself for this, Sairex! You couldn't have known and I told you already, it was a risk I was willing to take. But...we should....get out of this room for now. It....It's something of a mess."

"A bath might be nice."

Miroku agreed wholeheartedly.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was met by the joyous return of the hunting party, although one look at his grim countenance was enough to make them all worry. Not to mention that he smelled of blood.

"What happened, my Sesshoumaru?" Toga asked with a frown.

"We were attacked. Again. The castle guard is light because most of them are leaving in light of the wolves arriving soon."

Toga ground his teeth. Inuyasha frowned. "What happened?"

"I am not wholly certain, but someone drugged the raven and eviscerated the monk."

"Eviscawhat?" Inuyasha's ears flattened back.

"Ripped out his heart and his internal organs." As Inuyasha almost ran off in a horrified panic, Sesshoumaru snagged him by the hair and stopped him short. "I have already revived him. I believe he and the raven have gone to clean up. They will be moving to a new room down the hall."

"I do not like that my home is so assailed of late," Toga growled angrily. "Measures will be taken to assure this sort of thing stops. And soon."

Kouga glanced at the large and rather messy bundle they had brought. "Eh, I think this will cheer up the monk and the raven, though..."

"Immensely. I shall let them know it has arrived," Toga nodded. "...Shortly. I will allow them their bath first. Is all well again, my Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru nodded. "All signs of attack are past, I have repositioned the guard and commissioned servants to clean up the mess. After I clean myself up, I believe I shall retire for the evening. First I must inform Rin that it is safe, however."

Toga nodded. "Very good." He turned to Kouga and Inuyasha. "Despite the poor news on our homecoming, it was a pleasure hunting with you both and I wish to do it more in the future." He gave Inuyasha a hug and Kouga a grin. Both were returned.

"Yeah. But I think we all need to stick around here for a while and get up some kinda ward. We can't have people popping in to damage stuff and us every other day."

"Agreed. We shall work on it in the morning."

The four of them parted ways to take care of their remaining tasks before bed.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Karalichala smiled, still humming to herself as she set about her spellcasting. The massive mound of obsidian in front of her dwindled as dark scales appeared on the standing but inanimate dead dragon before her.

Of course, reconstructing the body was the easy part. She still had to recall the soul and bind it to a phylactery, and then of course make DAMNED sure that Jormandar could control it. It would not do to have Tsetsukosei running about freely again...although she rather did like the thought of taking the dracolich's power for her own. She was simply unsure if she could safely perform the ritual.

And there was no reason to be greedy. She was carrying Sairexannaras' child. If it was a girl, she would simply kill the babe and take its essence. It had been so very long since she had tasted the soul of one of her own clan! So little power was to be had from the youkai and human brats Jormandar brought her every week. But if the child was male...she had use for him. Of course, if it was a girl, she would have to assault Sairexannaras again...such a prospect made her queasy and stole some of her mirth.

Next time, it was unlikely he'd be in a mostly unguarded castle, blind, and mentally unable to strike her. He would have sensed her half a realm away. It was only through years of expending a disgusting amount of power that she had been able to remain hidden from him as long as she did. Jormandar had helped her significantly there. Karalichala's lip curled up in a sneer. What males would do for a little sexual pleasure, even if she wouldn't let him take her!

She thought again that perhaps she should have killed the Deathraven when she had the chance. But with a self-deprecating smirk, she shook her head. No, she knew what they said...and it was true. Too dangerous to live, too valuable to kill. Especially now.

She did wonder how it was Jormandar had known the answer to her question, that Tenseiga would completely heal all wounds inflicted on the one it was reviving. However, he had been correct. If he had been wrong, she never could have conceived Sairex's child.

Her theories had paid off. Now she simply had to find a way to remain hidden long enough to birth her child. She prayed it would not be a female child...but would spend the time trying to prepare for what she would have to do in case it was.

After all, a male child could sire future children for her. Perhaps, then, the Kinslayer would have less use...and while the knowledge he held was priceless, it may be better for her if he were destroyed.

Smiling and still content with herself, she resumed the tedious task of rebuilding Tsetsukosei's armored hide.

------------------------------------------------

A/N - Yes, Karalichala is a raven of the same clan as Sairex. And yes, she has the same strange, tilted accent....but so as not to give away that particular aspect of her evilness, I carefully chose her words so they did not contain the visual clues that define Sairex's speech. W's to V's, S's to Z's, Th's often becoming D's...yeah.


	49. Chapter 48

Pride (In the Name of Love) 48 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Coming soon - Chapter 49, or "Inu no Taisho Creates the first Department of Homeland Security". Or...I can do this 24 style...and create CTU. I suppose Circle Demons are kinda terrorists, right? *waves a 24 flag* Ahem. Anyway...

Should I have written this story in parts? Does anyone think its BAD for a story to be superlong? I don't intend to change it, wouldn't make much sense....but....lol...maybe I'll eventually split it up into parts. I'm not sure if a story being too long discourages readers or not...not me, but maybe someone, somewhere...thinks.."Damn. I don't wanna read ALL THAT"...*shrug*

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Toga had been right. Sairex and Miroku both were thrilled to hear that their hunt had been successful. Sairex had given Miroku the task of gathering a long list of ingredients and a very large cauldron almost immediately. The monk was eager to help fix his lover and scurried off to start gathering things or have them be gathered. He'd rejoin them in their new room soon. The moment he was gone, Sairex snagged Toga before the inu could depart.

"My Lord...Toga..."

Toga raised an eyebrow and stopped, turning and closing the door again. "Yes, my friend?"

Sairex's voice was quiet. "Vhat did zhe do to him?"

"My Sesshoumaru was somewhat sparing of detail, but...he is fine now. He is fully healed due to Tenseiga's power."

"Vhat...did...zhe do...? Please. I need to know, and I can take it. I am not zo fragile."

"She took out his heart and cut open his belly. Removed his internal organs...why do you need to know?"

"Hn...divination."

"Pardon?"

"Zhe vanted da answer to a question. Dere...is a method to use da entrails of a living body to divine an answer to a zimple question. It isn't terribly reliable and fails more often dan not."

"That is gruesome, Sairex. Can you do such things?"

"Kaa...yes. I'm quite good at divination, zcrying...it is zimply da vay my talents run. However, I don't much care to practice dat particular form of divination. Despite my history, you know I'm no bloodthirsty monster."

"Of course not."

Sairex suddenly paled and whirled, clutching Toga by the arms, his expression frantic. "Vait...how deep does da healing of dat zvord run?"

"Tenseiga? As far as I know, the healing is complete. Even to the point of erasing old scars."

Sairex staggered backwards and nearly fell back in the bath. He probably would have if Toga hadn't darted forward and snagged his shirt.

"Sairex, what is wrong?"

"No...no, no..."

Toga's alarm increased and he pulled the raven closer to him. "What is wrong?" he repeated.

"If it heals all vounds vhen it revived....den it healed me, too. Dat means I am...den...oh god."

"You aren't making sense, Sairex. Calm down, breathe..."

"Zhe CAN have my child!" the raven hissed venomously. "Da zvord vould correct da damage I did myzelf..."

"Oh..."

"Zhe must be killed. Now. Zhe can not...if I...if...zhe...If da child is born, how can I kill it? No good can come of my clan."

"You came from your clan, Sairex."

"I vas zhielded and isolated."

"Who is to say your child can not also be so? You certainly wouldn't impart wicked knowledge to them. I agree, this mother should be destroyed...already the acts she has committed are as despicable as you claim the rest of your clan to be, but a babe is, by nature, innocent."

Sairex chuckled, although there was no humor in it. "All for naught...my race continues beyond me despite my efforts. But ... you are right. I vill have to raise and care for dis child..." He paused and then frowned, his voice dropping lower. "Vhat do you tink Miroku vill zay?... How can I ask dis of him...?"

Toga smiled and clapped his friend on the shoulder. "No worries. In fact, I rather think he'd consider the child as his own and be happy to share in that with you. He seems a good sort. He won't throw you out because of something like this. You can relax. He loves you."

"He zhouldn't, it already got him killed."

"Oh, my friend...if it is one thing I have learned...you cannot pick the ones you love. Love is not a choice, it's an occurrence. It happens. It doesn't care how unlikely or inadvisable a match may be." Toga's tone had turned a bit introspective at that. "If you will excuse me, I have my own inadvisable interest to sleep with."

"You know you're torturing yourzelf vith dat."

"I would rather torture myself by being close and wanting to be closer than waking up in the morning to find he's done something stupid. Sesshoumaru is very stubborn when he makes up his mind about things and he already made up his mind, in some ways, that this was ultimately his own fault. Believe me, Sairex, I don't like to think my pup is suicidal, but I am not fool enough to blind myself to the truth simply because I do not like it." Toga winced and then closed his eyes, his voice heavy. "He has already tried. And while he seems better in many ways...it only takes one small thing to trigger all the pain he keeps bottled up inside. All it takes is one nightmare and I am not there. I will protect my pup, even from himself." Toga paused, then chuckled faintly. "I just don't know who is going to protect him from me."

"Kaa...you vould never hurt him and you're taking great pains to not take advantage of him. Vhat's vrong vith loving your pup if he vants your love? Zezzhoumaru is not veak, nor is he a child even if you cannot tink of him as anyting but. He has zeen da dawn of many centuries. He is intelligent and aware, and he is ztrong. He is capable of making his own choices."

"He idolizes me and would do anything to avoid my displeasure. I fear that may even include sharing my bed, and I do not mean that in the fashion he is at present."

"Den be forvard vith him. Ask him vhat he tinks. He vouldn't lie to you. You vorry too much."

Toga sighed. "Everything always has to be so complicated. Do you know what his mother would do to me if she knew I was even entertaining thoughts of lust for him?"

Sairex smirked. "You better take me to my new room and get going. You have a conversation to hold."

"Meh...I hate when you're right."

"I'm usually right."

"I have a lot of hatred."

Sairex chuckled and let himself be led out of the room to his new quarters.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga wasn't sure if Sesshoumaru was still awake by the time he crept into his room. A pair of golden eyes gleamed at him a moment later - apparently, he was. "Mm...I am sorry if I woke you. I spent longer than I thought talking with Sairex."

"It is alright. I was not yet asleep."

"Good, because I do need to talk with you." Toga was aware that he was uncharacteristically fidgeting with his clothing and he willed himself to stop, instead moving to systematically change into his sleeping pants.

"About?"

"Well, we have several security issues, but that can wait until morning. I have already arranged to have a meeting that we may all sit and discuss what we can do." Toga crawled into bed and propped himself up on his elbow, laying on his side so he could look at Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru was in much the same position. Toga was momentarily struck by how the moonlight brought out all the best features in the younger taiyoukai...the shimmering silver of his hair, the smooth, pale skin...

Aware that he was staring, he abruptly shifted his gaze and cleared his throat. "I know that you are aware of the..way my feelings for you have changed from what they once were."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly. "Yes."

"If you are willing, I do intend to progress in this new facet of our relationship. However, I do not wish to take advantage of you. I need to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that any advances you allow me are not simply because of our previous relationship. I need to know that you want this as badly as I and are not...placating me. Humoring me. Trying to keep me from being upset or disappointed."

Sesshoumaru smiled. In a weird way, it was touching to see his father so concerned over this. "My Lord Father...there is no one, alive or dead, whom holds my respect as you do. You have been all I have striven to be. You will always hold that respect and place of honor in my estimation. However, be that as it may...while I may be...uncertain... about many things...unsure of myself, what I feel, what to do, how to proceed...Even if I cannot sort out all my own confusing feelings, if I did not wish your touch, I would not allow you to touch me. My Lord Father or not, I simply would not allow you to take undesired liberties. I have stood up to you in the past, this is no different."

Toga raised an eyebrow before speaking slowly. "So you are saying you DO want me...?"

Sesshoumaru flushed and looked down. "I do not...not... want you. I simply do not know what I DO want. It is very strange for me. I am not used to submitting to anyone in anything, and yet I have an incredible urge to do so with you. It is...pleasing to me. That in itself is confusing and strange. I am unused to such a position. And I...I am entirely unskilled in...in this regard. I have never...I mean..."

Toga smiled as Sesshoumaru trailed off. He knew well enough what his pup was trying to say. In fact, the thought of Sesshoumaru being entirely unskilled, as he had so succinctly put it, sent a shiver down his spine. Oh, the things he could teach him...and would teach him. It was a huge weight off his shoulders to hear from Sesshoumaru's own lips that he would be stopped if he attempted anything unwanted.

Sesshoumaru sucked in a breath as he was abruptly pinned flat on his back, his wrists pinned on either side of his head by Toga's hands as the elder taiyoukai hovered over him. "That is actually a delight to hear. Do not worry...you can not disappoint or upset me in any way. There are many things I will teach you, but it will not be this night. Too much to do tomorrow morning..."

Sesshoumaru's eyes half closed and his voice was a soft murmur. "Of course. I understand if you, in your elder years, cannot stay up a little late and make it through the next day..."

Toga blinked and then burst out laughing. "Why you little devil..." Sesshoumaru simply smirked. "You best be careful what you wish for."

"This Sesshoumaru is always appropriately cautious."

"Mm... what is the extent of your relationship with Inuyasha?"

Here Sesshoumaru's blush returned anew and he squirmed ever so slightly, trying to think of how to phrase it without admitting to anything. "I...we...er..."

Toga chuckled and then lowered his head to nip gently at Sesshoumaru's ear. The breath flew out of the younger taiyoukai in a startled gasp, and he abruptly found it hard to concentrate. "W-we were...in the bath and he...touched me..."

"That is all?" Toga was somewhat surprised. Sesshoumaru was THAT untouched? Oh, this would be even more delightful than he had previously anticipated.

"Yes..."

Toga smiled inwardly and slowly trailed his lips down the slender and graceful line of Sesshoumaru's throat, hesitating only briefly. He knew that such a show of dominance over his rather dominant pup, especially after what he had been through, could backfire...however, he didn't think he was reading the signs wrong. He lightly kissed and licked at the skin before closing his teeth in a gentle love-bite.

He hadn't been wrong. Sesshoumaru's reaction was what he had hoped for and more. The younger taiyoukai let out a sharp gasp, his back arching slightly as a warm shudder ran through him. He tilted his head to the side, baring his neck in an open display of submission, reveling in the surprisingly erotic thrill it gave him. He had always assumed he would despise being dominated by anyone for any reason. And with anyone else, he probably would have been correct.

His thoughts were abruptly distracted as Toga's hands released his wrists and instead wrapped firmly around him, pulling him flush against his own body as he leaned in to give him a deeply passionate, thorough kiss. Sesshoumaru opened to it willingly and returned it. Their tongues twined and slithered around each other before eagerly exploring every bit of each other's mouths. Hands tangled in long silvery hair and their bodies pressed tightly together.

Sesshoumaru realized with a start as they ground together that his father was as wholly aroused as he was. It was only with a supreme act of will that Toga released his lips, panting hard, his golden eyes dark with desire.

"As badly as I want you...I was serious. Dawn will come early and we both need our sleep. If...if I do not stop before this goes much further...I will not be able to and we will both still be awake although liably quite exhausted by sunrise."

Sesshoumaru nodded, somewhat dazed, and then let out a long breath. He knew Toga was right, although the thought of drowning in sensation ALL NIGHT did nothing to cool the lust still spreading through his blood.

Toga sighed and gave in to the urge to kiss him again, although it was much longer and more intimate than he had intended. A small groan escaped him. "Dear gods, you undo me...I'm so grateful you want this. I don't know how I ever would have resisted you." Toga sighed and flipped Sesshoumaru to his side and snuggled against him...although this proved to be a rather compromising position and did little to calm either of them. Sesshoumaru thought briefly about grinding back against the elder inu but decided he probably really DID need some sleep tonight...although the urge almost won out over his logic.

"Goodnight, my Sesshoumaru..." Toga whispered, delivering another kiss and gentle nibble to Sesshoumaru's ear.

"Goodnight..."

It was likely to be a long night for both of them.


	50. Chapter 49

Pride (In the Name of Love) 49 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I had fun with this chapter. ^^ I hope y'all en joy it as much as I did.

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"So what, exactly, are you going to do with all this stuff?" Miroku finally asked. Sairex grinned.

"Noting."

"Nothing? But..."

"YOU are going to do plenty vith it, however. I can't zee, I can't very vell be measuring out ingredients and vhatnot."

"Good point. What do I need to do first, then?"

"Vell, da heart needs to be cut up into zmall pieces."

Miroku glanced at the massive dragon heart. "That...is going to take forever."

"Vell, I never zaid it'd be a quick process. After it is cut up, ve boil it vith a few of da tings you brought until da vater is gone, den ve get to pound it into paste."

Miroku frowned. "Are you serious?"

Sairex snorted. "Of course I'm zerious. Vhat, did you tink I just vanted it for a snack? Anyvay, da boiling process vill take a couple days, so...ve might as vell get dat started and den get zome zleep. Have a meeting in da morning..."

Miroku sighed and headed out to find something big enough to start chopping the heart with.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Morning rolled around, and the defense council started setting up for its first meeting. Inuyasha, Kouga, Sairex, and Miroku were all at the table and munching on a light breakfast. It was a few moments before Sesshoumaru and Tpga stumbled in, both of them looking like they hadn't slept terribly well. And in truth, they really hadn't, though it was not for lack of trying.

Inuyasha gave Sesshoumaru a knowing smirk and received a death glare in response. The hanyou's sensitive nose could pick up well enough that nothing major had actually happened between the two of them... but that didn't mean he was above teasing his brother given the opportunity.

Toga yawned and stretched. "Alright, settle down, boys. Now, we all know the problem...there have been far too many attacks on this House of late. Successful attacks, I might add, and that is more than a little distressing to me."

Sairex spoke up first. "Vell, I can zet up zome zpell-vebs and teach Miroku how to as vell. Dat vill keep any...extraplanar and zneaky zorts from being able to zurprise us again. It vill provide a zhield dat no Circle demon can pass vithout alerting us as vell as alert us vhen someone breaches any unguarded parts of da perimeter."

"Good, good."

"My wolves should be arriving tomorrow morning. Soon as they get here, we'll set up a guard at various points. I promise you, if anything happens at ANY point on your borders, every guard in your lands will know about it within a couple moments."

"Great, bunch of noisy wolves howlin' all over the place...." Inuyasha rolled his eyes and dodged the good natured swat from Kouga.

"Good. As long as we are all aware something is wrong, we should be able to defend against it. Inuyasha, I would like you and Prince Kouga to also set up border patrols. Hand-pick a few units and run patrols yourselves. You are more than a match for all but the most powerful of creatures that would dare come to my lands in hostility."

Inuyasha nodded. "Sounds good to me."

"Good. I'm glad we have that taken care of. Now, as I am rapidly regaining my strength and you all have your various duties, I shall be announcing my public return soon. I'll have to throw a banquet or some such thing to reassure all those that don't believe my resurrection..." Here Toga glanced at Sesshoumaru.

"I shall make the arrangements."

"Thank you. Oh, yes...Inuyasha... I have a gift for you."

"Yeah?" Inuyasha blinked and peered at his father, ears twitching forward in curiosity. Sesshoumaru answered for him, however.

"A proper wardrobe of clothing and some armor so you don't have to walk around looking like some gods-forsaken heathen."

"Sesshoumaru," Toga scolded gently.

Sesshoumaru glanced at his father and paused for a moment before continuing.. "Barbarian vagrant? Uncultured plebian?"

Inuyasha smirked and flicked a bite of his breakfast at his brother's face with a grin. The taiyoukai barely managed to get a hand up to block the flying food, surprised at the edible assault. He then grinned hugely. He knew it was just a change of clothing and whatnot, but it made him feel so much more like an official ranking member of the House. "Thank you...I'm eager to try 'em out."

Toga grinned and sipped at his drink. "It was actually Sesshoumaru's idea."

Inuyasha's gaze traveled to his brother. "Really?"

"No. Our Lord Father was up all night attempting to come up with a really cunning lie to tell you, and that was it," Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes.

"That would explain why you both look so tired." Inuyasha said with a smile, all wide-eyed innocence. Toga coughed and Sesshoumaru's gaze shot down to his plate, his cheeks tinging a slight shade of red. Before either of the two could respond, however, a piercing howl echoed from across the courtyard. Kouga leapt to his feet and darted to the window, ears twitching.

Toga set his glass down so he didn't accidently smash it. "You have GOT to be kidding me..."

Kouga listened for a moment before making his announcement. "Ginta says we got what looks like a war-party coming to the front door. They aren't making any attempt to hide. Cat demons, by the look of em, and with the seal of the East."

"Kanjiro..." Sesshoumaru said with a wince.

Inuyasha thought for a moment, then grinned. "Hey, I got a plan...you guys just stay here. I'll take care of this. Where are my new clothes? I want to look official."

"In your room. The Eastern Lord has been an issue?" Toga arched an eyebrow and glanced at Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha had already hopped from the room.

"He is strong and stubborn. I was able to keep him more or less under control but he saw Inuyasha's ascension to the throne as ..suspicious, at best."

"I see...I wonder what your brother has planned." Toga leaned back and took another sip of his drink. "This should be interesting."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha grinned maniacally as he looked at himself in the mirror. He puffed out his chest, feeling particularly intimidating and impressive looking in his new outfit, which was similar to the style of his father and brother but had different designs and a bit more red.

He hurried to the door to greet none other than Kanjiro himself, putting on his best polite but disinterested look. Kanjiro inclined his head stiffly, trying not to show his surprise at the hanyou's change of decor. "Lord Inuyasha, I am here to end this farce."

"Farce? Hm. Perhaps you should come in and join me. We can discuss this civilly. I have no desire to fight your little army."

Kanjiro growled, but nodded. "Fine."

"Come with me." Inuyasha smiled pleasantly and strode off to the dining hall.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The East almost lost their Lord to heart failure. Kanjiro, moody but determined to end Inuyasha's 'false reign', stalked into the dining hall and stopped dead, his jaw unhinging at the sight of first Sesshoumaru, then Toga. He stared in unabashed shock.

"My Lord Father, Lord Sesshoumaru, I believe you both know Lord Kanjiro? He is here to discuss the terms of our surrender, I believe."

Toga smiled in a way that bared his fangs. "Really, now..."

"Oh please, do have a seat, Lord Kanjiro." Sesshoumaru said calmly.

Kanjiro finally got his mind and his mouth to connect enough to form words. "You're dead!" He pointed somewhat accusingly at Toga.

Toga glanced down at himself. "Funny, that...I don't feel very dead. My Sesshoumaru, perhaps I am mistaken in my old age?"

"You are quite alive, my Lord Father."

"Mm. I do think my mind is going, however." Toga stood up smoothly and strode over in front of Kanjiro. The slender, willowy neko was dwarfed by the broad-shouldered, heavily armored inu. "I believe I imagined something was said of the surrender of my House."

"Oh, no, you remember just fine," Inuyasha supplied helpfully.

Toga's grin was fierce, his golden eyes lighting up, and something about him seemed to just scream that he would LOVE to bathe in neko-blood. Kanjiro was pale and took a couple steps backward at the inu's feral smile.

"Will you not join us for breakfast, Lord Kanjiro? It seems we have much to discuss," Sesshoumaru purred, sipping at his tea and trying hard to hide his glee. He HATED his long-time rival and was loving every moment of this.

Kanjiro scrambled backwards several more steps, fumbling for the door. "I-I apologize, my lords...something....something has come up and I need to attend to it. Another time."

"General Kouga, would you mind escorting our guest out?" Toga asked. Kanjiro's eyes widened further at the implications of Kouga's presence. The wolf pack, closely allied with the West? Perhaps his own position wasn't so secure as he thought...

"Of course, my lord." Kouga said with a smart bow, giving Kanjiro a toothy grin, his tail lashing and betraying his amusement.

Once they were out of the room, Inuyasha and Toga broke out into laughter. Sesshoumaru even joined them with a small chuckle, truly amused. "Oh, well played, little brother...well played indeed."

"Hehehe...I thought the kitty was going to keel over..." Inuyasha snickered.

"I didn't think breakfast was THAT dreadful." Toga smirked as he glanced at their plates.

Sesshoumaru stood up after their mirth had died down some. "If you will excuse me, I need to check on Rin. I intend to begin training her in combat. It is high time she learned some self defense."

Toga nodded. "Shall we all meet for dinner, then?"

After that was taken care of, they parted and went their separate ways.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was still grinning inwardly by the time he made it to Rin's room, tapping lightly on the door. "Rin? Are you awake?"

Rin's voice called cheerily a moment later. "Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Sesshoumaru entered the room...and stopped dead, his eyes widening. He couldn't make sense of what he was seeing.

Rin stood before him, but she had changed. Jagged crimson stripes decorated her face. Her eyes were red, sharp little fangs peeked over her lower lip, her fingers ended in talons, and a long fluffy white length of fur draped around her shoulders and trailed down her sides.

A moment later, a growl came from his transformed ward.


	51. Chapter 50

Pride (In the Name of Love) 50 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Fifty Chapters and a prologue. Can I claim this is epic now? In length, anyways, I don't know about quality. XD Another fun chapter...although I have to get back to the bad guys sometime...

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Rin's growl was, quite possibly, the least threatening sound Sesshoumaru had ever heard. Rin looked at him in a way she probably considered fierce and wiggled her claws in his direction. "Grrraaawr! Rin is a fearsome demon!"

Sesshoumaru was aware that his jaw had dropped and that he was staring, but he was simply too flabbergasted to react. Too many thoughts were rapid-firing though his mind. // Who has done this to my Rin? HOW was this done? Is she possessed? She still smells like...well, dammit, flowers... Rin always smells like flowers. I think she does it on purpose because I said once I hated the smell of humans..//

Rin blinked at the shell-shocked look on Sesshoumaru's face. It was an expression she had never seen before. She paused as she considered him, wondering what could be wrong. She gasped suddenly. "OH! Rin is sorry if she scared you, Sesshoumaru-sama...! I didn't mean it!"

Sesshoumaru shook himself from his thoughts, his fingers twitching warily by the hilt of his Toukijin. "Rin...you will explain to this Sesshoumaru how this has come to be. Now."

Rin blinked, then giggled. She noticed Sesshoumaru's gaze darkening. "Lord Sesshoumaru, Rin is just Rin. Rin is not a demon."

"....You have fangs, claws, your eyes are red, and...and you have markings identical to this Sesshoumaru's."

Rin giggled again and reached up to her mouth. Sesshoumaru jerked back slightly in surprise as Rin casually popped the fangs out of her mouth. "Hehe...its not real. Kagome helped me make a demon disguise!"

"A...demon disguise."

Rin nodded and proceeded to pull off her fake claws, then took out the red contact lenses. Sesshoumaru eyed the small red-tinted films in surprise, but felt better when his ward's eyes were back to their normal tone. Somehow, that crimson gaze coming from the girl had bothered him intensely. "The stripes are just paint...and my fluffy is just...well...fluffy. It doesn't move and isn't as warm as yours is, Sesshoumaru-sama." Rin offered forth the furry boa for Sesshoumaru's inspection. "Do I make a scary demon?"

Sesshoumaru elected NOT to inform his ward that scary was probably a goal she would never achieve, no matter her disguise. He inhaled deeply, glad that his sorely jangled nerves were calming down. He simply did not handle shocks very well these days, it seemed. "Rin, this Sesshoumaru would instruct you in the art of combat and self-defense if you are willing. I would have you able to protect yourself from at least some levels of threats."

"Ooh!" Rin's eyes lit up and she bounced over to him eagerly. "Can we start now? Rin is excited!"

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly. "Yes...although perhaps you should wash your face first, else you may terrify my palace guards."

"Oh...! Rin would not like to scare people. If I was a demon, I would be a nice demon."

"Demons are not generally very nice, Rin."

"You are nice. Your father is also very nice...and so is your brother. And the raven is nice too! And so is the kitsune that lives here. And --"

"Rin."

Rin stopped immediately and just smiled adoringly at Sesshoumaru. "I'll go clean up."

"Good. Meet me in the arena when you are finished." Sesshoumaru turned and headed off, unable to hide a smirk. Him, nice...and his father? Very nice? // Dear girl, if only you knew. He is pleasant and personable enough now, but there is good reason why he is considered a feared legend among all demons. He was not given that honor without due cause. //

Rin noticed the distant look on Sesshoumaru's face. "Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Yes, Rin?"

"I heard Lord Inuyasha say that you and your father are mates now." Rin beamed, thinking this was absolutely wonderful news.

Sesshoumaru almost choked. "He said that, did he?" // Perhaps I need to give my hanyou brother a lesson in learning to keep his teeth together before I knock them out. //

"Rin thinks this is wonderful! He makes you happy and you act more...more..." Rin struggled for a word. "Fluffy around him."

"Fluffy?" Sesshoumaru scowled at the thought of ANYONE calling him 'fluffy'. "Rin, this Sesshoumaru does not act 'fluffy'."

"No? I rather like the description, my Sesshoumaru..."

Sesshoumaru froze at the deep voice from the doorway and restrained the urge to twitch. "My Lord Father, with all due respect, do not even THINK about it."

Toga tossed a wink to Rin. "I wouldn't dream of it...Fluffy."

Rin bit back a giggle as Sesshoumaru whirled.

"Oh come now, pup. I think it's cute."

"This Sesshoumaru is not cute!" He had the urge to proclaim himself a fearsome demon, but all he could think of was Rin proclaiming the very same thing a short while ago.

Toga grinned. "Oh, I don't know...I think you're rather cute. Wouldn't you say so, Lady Rin?"

Rin nodded eagerly. "Sesshoumaru-sama is very cute!" She beamed happily - in her opinion, that was a wonderful compliment.

Sesshoumaru's eyes gleamed golden murder at Toga. "Perhaps, my Lord Father, you wish to come with us to the arena so that I may show Rin some proper swordplay in action."

Toga's eyebrows arched at the veiled challenge and he smirked. "Very well. I'll be happy to assist you..."

Sesshoumaru twitched, waiting for it. As Toga strode out, he relaxed slightly, only to have his fangs snap together in a growl as his father headed out the door.

"...Fluffy."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Sairex, I'm really not at all comfortable with doing this, you know."

The raven let out a long-suffering sigh. "Miroku, ve have been troo dis already. You don't vant to do it yourzelf, I can't do it myzelf, and you von't let anyone else do it. Zo dat makes you it. Bezides, I don't tink dere is anyting you can do dat vill result in my death. Expensive loss of ingredients, yes....but no death."

Miroku sighed as he eyed the bag full of Sairex's various powders and liquids, then the cheerily bubbling dark purple cauldron next to him.

"Ve just make a little at a time. Trust me, Miroku. I've done dis a lot. I'll be able to tell you vhat to use by color and zmell. For da most part."

Miroku gulped and continued arranging vials in front of him. With a heavy sigh, he looked at Sairex. The raven was cool and confident.

"Don't vorry, Miroku. It's not zo hard as you might tink. Now, find an orange powder in a black clay jar."

"Ok, got it...hn, all I need is to be a bit older and have less teeth...and be a woman...and I might feel right about this..."

"Miroku da vitch? Kaa...alchemy is not just a vitch's field."

"Well, I feel sorta witchy."

Sairex snickered. "Go, go...do vhat I told you."

After a lot of instructions and several different things - none of which Sairex actually told him what they were, and Miroku was rather grateful for that - Sairex finally stopped.

"Da potion..vhat is it doing?"

"Well, it's not DOING anything. It did turn blue, though."

"Perfect. Ok, remember da clear liquids I told you not to touch? Now ve vill touch dem. Carefully. Get a bowl of da potion base. When we add da next bit, it'll have a reaction and hopefully be da right one."

"If it isn't?"

"Vell, ve'll find out. Da bottles are....er...damn."

"What?" Miroku peered at the raven in alarm.

"Vell...dey ARE labeled, but you probably don't either zpeak my native tongue or read our zcript."

"Safe to say no on both counts."

"Well, it vill be alright anyvay. Most failed potions zimply don't have an effect. I'll recognize da right one. Vell...add tree drops of da first vial to a bowl of da blue ztuff."

"Ack...it turned black...!"

"Mm, dat one is vrong...new bowl."

Miroku added the next one. Nothing so visual happened this time. Sairex took the bowl from him and then took a small taste before shaking his head. "Nope. Not dis one either."

"That's your testing method? Tasting?"

"Noting vill go vrong. And vhat I had you give me earlier vill zhield me from poisoning zo I von't be able to kill myzelf. It's fine."

Miroku sighed and offered the next bowl. Sairex took a sip and blinked several times.

"Not right...I feel ztrange."

Miroku gawked and almost dropped the bowl he was handed. As he watched, Sairex's body shifted to that of a voluptuous female. "S...S...Sairex...?!"

"Vhat? Erk..vhat happened to my voice? And vhat is...oh my..." Sairex's slender fingers had discovered her newly sprouted breasts. "Ermm....gimme dat bowl back..."

Miroku handed it over numbly. Another swallow and Sairex's body reverted to normal.

"Er...put dis one to da zide."

"What, for later enjoyment?" Miroku asked slyly. He preferred the raven as he was, but that didn't mean he didn't appreciate a gorgeous female.

"You never know vhen zometing like dat vill come in handy."

Sairex paused when tasting the next one. "Hmm...hey, I tink dis is right..." Miroku grinned, excited.

"Really?"

"Yes. Dis is it." Sairex nodded and settled down to drink until the bowl was empty. "Mmm, yes...I can feel it...it's vorking!"

Miroku cheered and leaped forward to hug his lover. "Wonderful! What do we do with the leftover? There isn't much after all our samples."

"Boil it down and den ve scrape up da powder left. It vill zave time in da future."

"And what about our...er...special potion?"

"Dat one...I zhould have a bunch of empty vials in my bag. Just pour it in and leave dem to cool down zome more. Den ve cap em up and zave dem. Vas I....really a female?"

"All the parts I could see. My hand was full or it probably would have groped you. It's cursed, you know."

Sairex snorted. "Right, right. Vell, I need a nap. I'm healing but it's making me very tired. I can't believe ve made zometing like dat...it's quite pozzibly da best potion of all time to use as a practical joke."

Miroku snickered. "In this household?"

"Pfft...Toga loves me an' vouldn't let his boys kill me."

"Toga?"

"Er...Lord Inu no Taizho?." Sairex grinned slightly.

"I've never heard anyone refer to him by name. I was beginning to wonder if he even had one. How long have you known each other, exactly?"

"A very long time. Zince he vas a pup and I vas a little fledgling. His father vas Lord of da Vest. My father vas chief of my clan. Dey had political dealings, and I zometimes vas brought along as next chief of da Clan to learn tings. Ve met on one of my visits and found a mutual like and respect for each other."

"Interesting. You ARE an old bird, eh?"

Sairex smirked. "I've told you dat zeveral times, but you don't ever zeem to believe me."

Miroku chuckled and escorted him towards their new room. "Well, maybe I should start..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A pair of pointed ears twitched and a mischevious smirk quirked his lips. // Best practical joke potion ever, hmm? //

Moving silently, Shippo slid into the room and peered about. It didn't take long to locate the cooling vials of warm blue liquid. They smelled pleasant enough...though he wasn't going to take a taste-test to find out if they worked!

The young demon smirked as he pocketed three of the vials. It wasn't likely Miroku had counted them. Really, he hadn't MEANT to spy and overhear, but he had been terribly curious as to all the strange smells coming from the makeshift laboratory and had to check it out.

Five years had given Shippo a good deal more height. His hair was longer and so was his tail. That was fine with him - all the young girls seemed to love the tail and he loved to have his ego stroked as much as any male. He knew he was a long way from being mature...and a good ways from his full growth...but it'd come with time.

Moving on stealthy paws, the impish kitsune padded out of the room, gleefully wondering whom he should prank first.


	52. Chapter 51

Pride (In the Name of Love) 51 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - This chapter is a bit on the short side, and I apologize. I'm a lil stressed, waiting to hear the results of my father's surgery and whatnot, and figured a short chapter was better than none at all. ^^

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Two smoky, vicious crimson flames sprang to life in empty black sockets. Tsetsukosei slowly turned his head and peered at the raven demoness standing before him, baring his thousands of teeth in a hideous snarl. When she spoke, it was in the native tongue of her clan, one the dracolich had learned countless years ago.

"Ah, good, you live again."

Tsetsukosei let out a rumbling growl before his grating, raspy voice clawed its way from his dead throat. "You smell of Sairexannaras. Did you dare touch my mate, little bird?"

"I did far more than touch him, Tsetsukosei."

The dracolich laughed, a terrible noise. "I hope it was worth the price, to slake your lusts upon death incarnate. There are things the Kinslayer is known for, and one of them is not mercy. Not to your kind."

"Kaa...he will have to find me first."

Tsetsukosei laughed harder, although he was inwardly growing angry. He could not move from the neck down. "Foolish little bird. You should have taken your chances with another raven demon. There are other clans. If your offspring was not bred true, you could have tried again. But like all your kind, your greed will be your undoing."

"Hn. I am no weak fledgling, dracolich. My power is enough to hold you bound. Let us speak of you for now. Your soul is bound to a phylactery in the possession of Jormandar, ranking Highlord of the Black Circle."

Tsetsukosei released a horrible growl. To think he would have to bow to the command of that simpering, twisted trickster! "Ah. And for your assistance in recalling me to my body...which I will admit you did a wonderful job of restoring...Jormandar gave you some way to get to my mate."

"Sairexannaras is your mate no longer, Tsetsukosei, if he ever was. He is...was...mated to a human."

"He is mine!" the beast roared in anger.

"He does not bear your mark."

Tsetsukosei growled viciously. "It is impossible to mark that slithery wretch...what do you mean WAS mated to a human?"

"I killed him."

The dracolich smirked. "So as to REALLY sign your death warrant...?"

"Hn. We shall see. I am not weak. I have absorbed the power of countless youkai."

"Sairexannaras absorbed the power of your entire damn clan."

Karalichala narrowed her eyes. "I tire of you, dragon. Your Master Jormandar will see you soon." The raven demoness vanished as abruptly as if she had never been present.

"Foolish little bird. I will revel in your death," Tsetsukosei hissed. // And the death of that wretched Jormandar...he dares think to command me? I shall deal with him in due time. For now I must be patient... //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga smiled and leaned casually against the wall, hefting the wooden practice sword. He had no doubt Sesshoumaru would have happily dueled him with real blades, but his pup was still at least acting under the pretense of this being a training session of sorts for Rin's benefit.

"Almost ready, Fluffy?" he asked casually.

Sesshoumaru whirled with a growl, his eyes sparking in incandescent ire at the unwelcome nickname. With a silent leap, he attacked.

Toga grinned and met his pup halfway. He knew there was absolutely no chance of Rin gaining any practical knowledge from their display - indeed, the girl was barely able to follow their movements which she was staring at wide-eyed - but that didn't mean he wasn't going to give at least as good as he got.

"Fluffy, am I? I will show you exactly how FLUFFY this Sesshoumaru is!" he growled. The practice swords beat a rapid-fire, staccato beat against each other, connecting so quickly as to almost sound like one long note. Sesshoumaru's mokomoko abruptly lashed forward, joining the fight.

Toga's grin had turned a bit more feral with the delight of the battle, the rush of adrenaline. He noticed with some curiosity that his pup did not often use his free arm as an additional weapon - an advantage he would exploit, even if he did not understand. It left him an opening.

Sesshoumaru fought a bit more defensively than he recalled teaching him long ago, now that he thought about it.

// Compensating for something... this will bear investigation. For now, however... // Toga carefully measured Sesshoumaru's attacks. His pup was good, so very good. His style constantly shifted so his patterns were not too repetitive, too predictable. He compensated for every tiny twitch of difference his father made in his strikes, and was terribly accurate at predicting and even jumping a step ahead of the next incoming blow.

Toga lashed in abruptly, slipping into the minute crack in Sesshoumaru's defenses and smacking the practice blade hard into his pup's ribs. Sesshoumaru leapt backwards as the breath flew out of him, an irate growl rattling in his throat.

"You unconsciously handicap yourself, my Sesshoumaru. Why?" Toga asked, casually twirling his sword in his fingers.

"I do not know...of what you speak," Sesshoumaru wheezed. That had hurt.

"You are compensating for an injury I cannot detect. Are you wounded, my Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru scowled as realization hit him. "I...only recently regained my arm."

Toga blinked, surprised, and slowly lowered his blade. "You lost your arm? How?"

"Inuyasha...cut it off when we were battling." Sesshoumaru admitted with a deep frown. He could read the unspoken 'continue' command in his father's gaze but was reluctant to speak.

"I would know why my sons were battling so viciously." Toga's tone was tight and clipped, angry and absolutely something Sesshoumaru would not ignore nor argue with.

"I was...a fool." Sesshoumaru sighed and bowed his head, closing his eyes. "Your death affected me greatly. In my anguish, I irrationally blamed it on my brother, that I might put a face to my rage...have something tangible to fight instead of accepting it. I was prideful and arrogant. I learned of the Tetsusaiga and I...coveted it. I was jealous. I attacked my brother with intent to destroy him. He surprised me and took my arm off, and very nearly killed me with your own fang. Tenseiga protected me and I escaped. I very nearly died and was incapacitated for a long while. Soon after I met Rin."

Rin gasped in surprise as she listened to this story - it was one she had not heard. Toga was looking at Sesshoumaru, his face devoid of expression. Sesshoumaru cringed inwardly and tried very hard not to do so outwardly as well. It was a long while before Toga spoke. He walked over to stand in front of Sesshoumaru and gently placed his fingers under the younger inu's chin, lifting his gaze to meet his own.

"My Sesshoumaru...know you that I love both you and your brother deeply. I did not bequeath the Tetsusaiga to Inuyasha because I favored him, but because he needed it. Just as you needed the Tenseiga."

Sesshoumaru frowned deeply. "I know this...my Lord Father, please forgive your son. I have been a fool and disgraced you."

"You made some mistakes and were distraught. You are young. But never, my Sesshoumaru, have you or will you disgrace me in any way. You have learned from your mistakes and will not repeat them. You grieve that you made them in the first place. But never, ever are you a disgrace, my precious Sesshoumaru. I could not be more proud of you."

Sesshoumaru flushed slightly, his eyes slipping over to eye Rin after a moment. She had her hands clasped together and was staring at the two of them with a definite AWWWW expression. Sesshoumaru could have sworn he saw little hearts popping up around her. Toga's own eyes followed the direction of his pup's and he smirked.

"Have you learned any valuable lessons yet today, Lady Rin?"

Rin blinked. "I...Rin tried to learn but you were moving really fast. Are you going to kiss Sesshoumaru-sama?"

"Should I?" Toga smiled innocently. Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and he attempted to move, finding himself abruptly caught around the waist.

"Y...you can't, not in front of her..."

However, Rin was nodding enthusiastically and absolutely beaming. Before Sesshoumaru could protest he abruptly found himself swept backwards off his feet dramatically. Toga flashed him a grin and then leaned in to give him a rather chaste but lingering kiss. Sesshoumaru was trying to find the willpower to glare to show his displeasure at his father ignoring his wishes in regard to his ward and public displays...but as usual, he could not.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shippo crept cautiously through the rafters in the kitchen. He had decided that Inuyasha would be his first victim. He just had to figure out what the cooks were preparing for dinner and which was Inuyasha's meal. The hanyou had a different diet than either Miroku or the demons he tended to dine with.

The servants bustled about underneath him, hurrying to make sure everything was prepared properly. Shippo eyed the food carefully, finally determining which meal was Inuyasha's. He slid stealthily along a wide beam, wondering how he would deliver his devious little potion.

He was completely unprepared for his tail to snag on a loose nail. Shippo barely bit back a yelp as his body jerked to a halt and he crashed onto his side. One of his three vials went skittering along the length of a beam to smash on the floor below. Another broke underneath him from the force of his unexpected landing. The third remained tightly in his grasp. However, the servants were aware of his presence now and began shouting angrily.

The kitsune decided it was time to cut his losses and took off at a dead run, neatly evading the irritated servants.

Behind him, a small pool of purply-blue liquid dribbled off the rafter from where he had landed, vanishing as it landed in the bubbling pot below.


	53. Chapter 52

Pride (In the Name of Love) 52 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Well, I missed yesterday due to Mother's Day and various other issues with my father's surgery so I make it up to you with a...mm...nice...chapter. It was written to music, actually, and some threads of the song may have made it into my writing...though the song ultimately has nothing to do with the situation. At all. Not even a little bit. XD Something about the story and the tune and the ultimate message...

For those that care, it was "Major Tom (Coming Home)". The remake version by Shiny Toy Guns (for some reason seems to tug my emotional strings more than Peter Schilling's version). For those that don't know, the song is written about a David Bowie song called "Space Oddity"...in which Major Tom takes off into space and stops responding to ground control and is presumed dead as his shuttle continues off. Well, this song is about Major Tom's flight and how he took off and was drifting off into space...and abandoning, giving up his life on earth and going home. No one else understood, everyone mourned...but ultimately, it was what he wanted, had to do. He wasn't being lost to space, he was going home. ((and as a further bit of trivia, Bowie wrote another song many years later after Space Oddity with a message from Major Tom in it, letting everyone know that he hadn't died after all. Just...so ya know.))

Back at ground control / there is a problem. / "Go to rockets full." / Not responding. / "Hello Major Tom. / Are you receiving? / Turn the thrusters on. / We're standing by." / There's no reply.

4, 3, 2, 1 / Earth below us / drifting, falling. / Floating weightless / calling, calling home...

Across the stratosphere, / a final message: / "Give my wife my love." / Then nothing more.

Far beneath the ship, / the world is mourning. / They don't realize / he's alive. / No one understands, / but Major Tom sees. / "Now the light commands / this is my home, / I'm coming home."

What does this have to do with this chapter AT ALL? Nothing, really...unless you consider the emotions behind it. Giving in to something that people would never accept...even if you regret things about it, doing it anyway because that is where your heart truly lies. A final decision, a choice that can't be taken back and won't be understood by pretty much anyone...and not one that is truly happy in all ways but ultimately will bring a measure of peace you cannot otherwise obtain.

Yeah, ok, I'm crazy. Just figured I'd share. You'll think its even crazier when you realize what that all was my mental soundtrack to...read on. And I hope you find it satisfactory... I attempted to do it justice.

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Rin was dismissed to return to her studies with the promise of more...detailed instruction in the art of combat the following morning. When the girl had left, Sesshoumaru jabbed his finger accusingly at his father.

"This Sesshoumaru does not appreciate you teasing me in front of my ward...nor any other sort of....of displays."

"Ah, but you make it so delightful..." Toga smirked, then moved without warning, catching Sesshoumaru and pinning him against the wall, his arms on either side of the younger inu to prevent an immediate escape. His voice dropped to a low murmur. "Displays, mm?"

Sesshoumaru swallowed. "She....does not need to bear witness to such things."

"You act as though I attempted to throw you down and ravish you in front of her eyes."

"It is...is not that. I just...do not like others becoming involved in my personal affairs. It is not their business."

"And y ou wish to be the only one to despoil the young Lady Rin's innocent naivete?"

Sesshoumaru's jaw dropped and he struggled to retaliate but was too stunned to retort beyond a blush.

Toga simply smiled. "Oh, believe me, not much gets by me, pup. I've seen the way you act around her. You are possessive, territorial, and protective...and you do love her. You've marked her and she bears it proudly."

"I...I don't...I..." Sesshoumaru sighed and took in a deep breath. "Had all continued in my life as normal as it was, yes, I intended to take her as my mate. Then everything changed and now...I am not ready for the responsibility of protecting a mate or raising a pup of my own. I am not...emotionally capable of being in such a position. Maybe eventually."

"You never cease to impress me." Toga smiled. He WAS impressed, both at Sesshoumaru's insight and his admission. And he knew it was likely the truth.

Sesshoumaru's eyes were slightly downcast - Toga knew how much his precious pup hated to admit to any weakness, especially to him. He caught the younger taiyoukai's chin in his fingers and forced his gaze back up to meet his own. "Let me take care of you for a while, then, my Sesshoumaru..."

Sesshoumaru's golden eyes widened slightly at the low, husky purr of Toga's voice. The words sent a shiver down his spine. Would it be so very terrible to relinquish control, to let someone else care for him, protect him? To not have to be strong for a while? // It would be if it were anyone but him... // His heart skipped a beat as the elder inu leaned in and claimed his lips in a gentle but intimate kiss. With a low sigh, Sesshoumaru gave in to the kiss and returned it, leaning back comfortably against the wall. Toga's lips caressed his tenderly but insistently, and slowly his tongue slid out to lightly trail over Sesshoumaru's lips. Sesshoumaru was more than willing to allow him entry, and Toga wasted no time in moving in, intent on tasting every bit of his delicious puppy.

Sesshoumaru felt the arms that had been halfheartedly pinning him in place coil around his waist and pull him into a warm embrace. He was more than happy to return the gesture, his arms snaking around Toga's neck and unconsciously pulling him in closer as their kiss deepened, both of them growing hungrier for the other. Toga took a half step forward, his body pressing flush against Sesshoumaru's and pinning him more firmly. Their tongues dueled and tried to tie one another in knots.

When Toga finally felt he would explode if he didn't breathe soon, he pulled back, his chest heaving. Sesshoumaru's expression was a cross between being utterly dazed and...hungry. With a low half growl, half moan Toga leaned in to kiss and nip at Sesshoumaru's ear, his hands sliding down to grip him by the hips and pull him closer. His blood was starting to burn at the intoxicating spicy-sweet scent and the indefinable, delicious taste of the beautiful creature against him. Oh, he wanted more...but he had to be certain.

Whatever reserves he held vaporized in the next moment as Sesshoumaru tilted his head, baring the long, graceful line of his throat in submission...an unspoken invitation and quite possibly the most seductive thing he could have done. Toga let out a pleased groan as his doubts vanished and he leaned in, gently nibbling at the vulnerable flesh before sinking his teeth in - not hard enough to draw blood but a clear display of dominance. Sesshoumaru's reaction simply heightened his lust, the younger taiyoukai letting slip a shuddering moan. Sesshoumaru was glad for the wall behind him and the sheer and simple solidity of his father's form - otherwise, he was sure he would have fallen as his legs seemed to have turned to water.

Distantly it occurred to Sesshoumaru that the midst of the public arena might not be the best place for this, although it took some time for his brain to understand why. Thinking wasn't high on his list of priorities at the moment. His train of thought almost derailed again at another nip to his throat. However, the half-formed idea took enough root for him to act on it. With a concentrated burst of will he teleported them both across the castle to Toga's bedchamber.

Toga felt a strange sensation intruding on his lust enough to flick his eyes open and withdraw slightly. He took note of their change of scenery and a grin spread across his face. "Convenient..." He paused to take a look at Sesshoumaru and almost groaned again - he always looked good, but there was something about those golden eyes being half-lidded and darkened with lust, those perfect lips kiss-swollen, slightly disheveled silver hair wisping about...

Toga simply could not resist, his arms snapping around Sesshoumaru's waist and pulling him tightly against his own body again, leaning in to crush their lips together, devouring him, trying to crawl into him through his mouth.

Before Sesshoumaru realized Toga's hands had shifted, he felt the weight of his sword belt gently pulled from him. Deft fingers expertly unfastened his armor next, letting it drop next to his swords. Before Sesshoumaru could think too long on it, however, he let out a startled noise as he was suddenly lifted off his feet and carried the short distance to the massive bed. He was set down on the edge of it as Toga took a half step back. Sesshoumaru swallowed and his heart fluttered in his chest like a broken-winged bird at the flaming gold eyes focused on him.

Toga took the moment to shed his own weaponry and armor before striding forward to join Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru had slid himself more to the middle of the large mattress. Toga wasted little time in slipping in and bracing himself on his arms over the younger taiyoukai, looking at him for a long moment before giving in to the powerful urge to kiss him again. Sesshoumaru's arms hooked back around him as he returned the kiss at least as good at it was given.

Toga shifted his weight to one arm, his free hand sliding down to work out the knot in Sesshoumaru's obi. Once that was out of the way he began working on his haori, pausing when he had the fabric opened. His eyes raked over the bared skin and he simply had to have a taste.

Sesshoumaru groaned as Toga's lips trailed over his collarbone and then down his chest. Powerful hands slid over the taut muscles of his stomach and over his sides, mapping out every inch of him. Toga burned the image and the feel of him into the back of his mind. He drew a startled gasp from Sesshoumaru as he latched his teeth gently onto a nipple, flicking the nub with his tongue. Sesshoumaru's back arched and his fingers fisted into the thick furs beneath him. Toga soon moved to grant the other the same treatment.

Sesshoumaru was so distracted from the unpredictable series of kisses, licks, and nibbles to notice that he was being further disrobed until Toga released him long enough to speak, his voice low and husky with desire. "Lift your hips." He complied, realizing distantly that after this last barrier was removed, he was entirely naked. The thought brought more blood to his cheeks. Toga stared at him for a long moment. "Dear gods, you're beautiful..." he whispered in an almost broken tone.

Toga was aware that he was staring and abruptly shook himself free of it, swooping in for another desperate kiss as he trailed his fingers along the jagged crimson stripes adorning Sesshoumaru's hips. Something in his mind was screaming desperately at him. It demanded he stop before it was too late. If things continued...this could not be undone. Even the more liberal minds of youkai society would not openly accept their relationship. No one would understand. It was so wrong of him to burn so for his pup...but even as his rational mind begged him to stop before it was too late, Toga knew it was already too late. His desire was too strong. And it was not mere lust, he fiercely loved his pup, as he always had. The want...the need to protect him, to love him...to replace the horrible memories seared into his mind with ones of pleasure...to feel that beautiful body against him, writhing in the deepest of ecstasies...the need overwhelmed his misgivings. Even if it damned him - and his mind assured him it would - Toga knew things were out of his control. With a low sigh, he surrendered.

Sesshoumaru's own thoughts were knotted and chaotic, when he could think enough to grasp feebly at them. Oh, but his father had a devious, talented tongue... His thoughts ran on a parallel to Toga's in a way. He knew how forbidden this particular union was, but he couldn't bring himself to care enough. He felt a fluttery nervousness beating at the back of his mind like dark wings, but it was still held distant by his knowledge, his unwavering trust, that he was safe here if no where else. Toga would never willingly do a thing to bring him harm...even if he was surely driving him to madness at the moment.

Sesshoumaru's vision failed him as white sparks suddenly exploded behind his eyes. Whatever thoughts he had had were sizzled away in the white heat that seared his brain as Toga's tongue slowly flickered over the head of his erection. The sensation snapped something in Sesshoumaru's mind and his gasp bled into a ragged moan as lips wrapped around the head of his cock, Toga's arm sliding over his waist to hold him still.

Toga slowly glanced up through his eyelashes to more fully gauge Sesshoumaru's surprisingly powerful reaction. A shuddering thrill ran down his spine and lust shot through his blood. Sesshoumaru was always so repressed and made such an effort not to feel that when that barrier was breached...when he gave in... it was all the more intense. Knowing that he was the one currently causing his pup such devastating pleasure was threatening to undo him more than anything else had previously.

Sesshoumaru panted harshly, unaware that his claws had punched holes through the fur they held in a death-grip. As Toga made love to him with his tongue and his mouth, as his almost painfully aroused shaft was drawn deep into that tight, wet heat...Sesshoumaru lost all ability to think. He couldn't fathom why he had ever had any resistance to this, why it could possibly be a bad idea. Hell, it was doubtful he could recall his own name at the moment. Sesshoumaru's spine bowed as another shattering wave of sensation crashed over him, but his hips were held firmly in place. He was distantly aware that someone was making a desperate, half-whining moan of need and it took him a moment to realize it was he himself.

Sesshoumaru's sensitive nose caught the faint scent of the oil, even though his mind was far too gone to bother identifying it fully beyond unthreatening and therefore fully unworthy of his notice at present. His body stiffened when he felt the first brush of Toga's now slippery fingers. The tension faded quickly, however, drowned by the overwhelming pleasure still being paid his erection.

Toga slowly worked his fingers back to Sesshoumaru's entrance, gently massaging a liberal amount of oil into the tight muscle. So distracted was Sesshoumaru, in fact, that he didn't notice when one digit slowly pressed into him a short way. The younger taiyoukai abruptly stiffened as the breath blasted from his lungs. Toga's hand froze and he released Sesshoumaru from his mouth. "Shh...I won't hurt you, my beloved..." he murmured.

"I know..." Sesshoumaru managed to gasp after a moment, willing himself to relax. The nervous tension in the back of his mind was no longer so distant. However, it got kicked into a corner a moment later. Toga had taken him back into his mouth as his finger slid in further and then bent just slightly, brushing against something inside of him that drew a sharp, involuntary cry from Sesshoumaru. His body arched against him so forcefully Toga almost wondered if he would snap his spine against his restraint.

Sesshoumaru had never, never imagined such a feeling could exist, that such a gentle touch could send so much ecstasy through his veins. All fear and nervousness was abruptly forgotten and the younger taiyoukai could do nothing but feel and struggle to continue breathing.

Toga carefully worked a second finger in with the first, taking advantage of the pleasure he had shot screaming through Sesshoumaru's veins. Sesshoumaru writhed in increasing desperation, his body insisting that he had to stop or surely shatter...and had to have more, else he would surely die. Nothing could be so intense, so impossibly overwhelming.

The leash on Toga's own patience and desire was strained and unraveling. He was reluctant to move but knew he had no choice. Slowly he let Sesshoumaru's erection slip from his lips, although he gave it several licks in consolation. He almost came undone at the desperate, needy groan that accompanied the withdrawal of his fingers. Sesshoumaru's eyes flickered open, wondering at Toga's withdrawal...and he paused to stare.

Toga wasted little time in removing his clothing and tossing it to the side. His eyes never left Sesshoumaru, aware of his pup's gaze as he finished stripping.

Sesshoumaru couldn't breathe. He was sure that this creature before him could be no mere youkai but surely must be a god, a god among gods. He was aware that he was staring, probably gaping, and he didn't care. Toga was an unrealized fantasy come to life. His form was flawless, powerful and yet graceful. Sesshoumaru's eyes drifted lower and he knew he was blushing. He was familiar with his own body, but somehow the certainty of Toga's was awesome.

Toga moved back into position and braced himself over Sesshoumaru, leaning forward to give him a kiss that was bruising in its intensity. Sesshoumaru could taste himself on his tongue and lips, and somehow that served only to heighten his already painful arousal. His moan was wild with burning need as the kiss broke. Toga had slid back and was kneeling between his legs, although he hadn't moved yet. It took a moment for Sesshoumaru to fathom his words when he spoke. It was a question as much as a statement. "I want to make love to you, my Sesshoumaru..." he whispered.

Sesshoumaru's mind reeled and he wondered if words alone were enough to throw one into climax. He said the only thing he could think of, aware that he was practically begging and not at all caring. "Oh, please..."

Toga needed no further prompting; he was fairly sure that if he didn't take care of his arousal soon his mind and body both would shatter, burn to ash. He poured a liberal amount of oil into his palm and worked it over his straining cock with a small hiss of breath, trying to recall the last time he had been so turned on. He could not.

With almost agonizing slowness, he positioned himself. One final glance did not provide a reason for him to stop and he slowly pressed forward.

Sesshoumaru's eyes popped back open as he felt Toga start to slide into him. Abruptly, panic welled up in his mind. Oh, this would never work...he was too big, he would never fit...and the pain, oh dear gods, the PAIN...

Toga felt him stiffen abruptly and froze, although every muscle in his body screamed for him to move. He fought desperately to control his breathing, his hands sliding soothingly over Sesshoumaru's chest, stomach and thighs in a gentle caress. "Relax...it may hurt a bit, but I promise it will feel so good...just relax...I won't harm you..."

When the immediate rending anguish of previous experience did not occur in whole or part, simply a mild discomfort at being unusually stretched, Sesshoumaru did relax. The fear receded and lust began to pool back in its place. He shifted his hips and drew a strangled moan from them both as the motion drove Toga further into him. Abruptly, his nervous fear shattered and Sesshoumaru wanted MORE, wanted it more than anything he had ever wanted in all his life. "Please...I...I need you...now...gods..." he managed to gasp.

Toga almost sobbed in relief and slowly pushed forward, biting his lip hard enough to draw blood as he sank into Sesshoumaru's body. Oh, he was impossibly hot and tight...no wonder this was a sin, it felt too good to be anything but.

Sesshoumaru moaned, his back bowed and his fingers digging into the bedding as Toga pushed into him completely. The sensation was wholly different than the brutality he had experienced previously, that he had secretly feared would inevitably occur no matter how careful Toga was. It did hurt a small bit, but it was a good ache, one that was melting as his body adjusted. He felt sure he would split apart, he was so very full...he had never felt so complete before.

Toga felt the subtle shift in his lover as Sesshoumaru adjusted to the invasion, the way he tried to press closer. He took the cue and withdrew before thrusting back in, almost coming undone at the sound of Sesshoumaru's gasp. His eyes slid shut as he began to rock his hips, a moan of his own escaping him.

Whatever lingering traces of pain Sesshoumaru had been experiencing vanished abruptly, washed out in this new flood of sensation. A heavy, primal, animal need boiled up within him and he groaned, overwhelmed and unable to get enough at the same time. He was sure whatever was left of his sanity had surely shattered. Desperate to sate this new need, he hooked his long, slender legs around Toga in an effort to pull him closer, deeper. He wasn't even aware of the pleas falling from his lips. "Oh gods...please...more..."

Toga couldn't resist even if he had wanted to. He shifted position so his body covered Sesshoumaru's more fully, a devilish smile curling his lips as he shifted the angle of his thrust and drove in powerfully. His effort was rewarded with a strangled half-scream as he ground against the bundle of nerves inside Sesshoumaru. With a low growl he surrendered fully, leaning in to latch his teeth into Sesshoumaru's throat, driving into him powerfully.

Sesshoumaru was mentally gone. His mind was screaming, crystalline strands of pleasure, resonating at a ever higher pitch. Every driving snap of Toga's hips rubbed the place inside him that boiled his blood and made him cry out. He was aware of the sharp fangs in his throat, deadly and dangerous and able to tear him open in an instant...and the claim for whatever reason only served to raise his passion to a new level. His claws dug into Toga's shoulders, although the bright dots of blood and tiny spears of pain simply drove Toga to a newer level of ecstasy.

Sesshoumaru's tenuous grip on reality melted as Toga's fingers curled around his throbbing erection, stroking him in time to the pounding of his hips. It was simply too much sensation. Sesshoumaru let out a howl as his world condensed to the point of a pin and then exploded, his orgasm ripping through him.

Toga's eyes rolled back in his head as Sesshoumaru's impossibly tight body contracted around him, spasming as he drove into that wonderful heat. The howl of rapture from his pup was too much for him to withstand in any case, and a loud groan of his own tore free of his throat. He snapped his hips forward as deeply as he could as his climax hit, electric shocks dancing across his nerves. He froze where he was for what seemed like an eternity as they both tried to regain something of themselves.

When Toga felt he could move without breaking, he moved to lay next to Sesshoumaru. They were both sweaty and exhausted and utterly sated.

It was with more than a little surprise that he saw the dazed blissful look on Sesshoumaru's face dissolve into an anguish so intense that his body convulsed and his eyes rolled back, unconsciousness claiming him.


	54. Chapter 53

Pride (In the Name of Love) 53 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - At the end of this chapter I'll have a lil more scientific explanation of something that I talk about in this chapter.

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Miroku awoke to a sleepy, irritated hiss from his lover. He slowly arched one eyebrow and peered at Sairex.

"Hn...vhy don't ve have proper drapes, again?"

"Well, last time we had proper drapes, you got in a wrestling match with them. And lost."

"Figures da first ting I zee vhen I can zee again is da damn zun in my eyes."

"You REALLY aren't a morning person, are you?"

"No. Me an' Yellow Face dere..." Sairex jerked a thumb in the direction of the midday sun, "...have zome unresolved issues."

A sharp rap sounded on the door, coupled with Toga's voice. "Sairex!"

"I knew zometing voke me up..." The raven sighed and hopped up. "I'm coming, I'm coming..." He blinked when the agitated taiyoukai came in. "Or you can just come in...it is your castle, after all."

"Are you well? Can you see again?"

Miroku frowned as he looked at Toga. The taiyoukai was disheveled and dressed only in a loose pair of pants, and obviously more than a little distracted and agitated.

"Yes...I zeem to be more or less better. Tings are ztill a little blurry, but my vision is returning and zo is my zpiritual magic."

"Good. I need your help. Something is wrong with my Sesshoumaru."

Sairex arched an eyebrow. "Oh?"

"He appeared to be in pain and then fainted."

"I zee...I vill have to take a look at him. Vhat vere you doing vhen dis happened?"

Neither of them missed the way Toga's spine shot ramrod-straight or a blank wall shielded his expression. "At the moment Sesshoumaru passed out?...Laying in bed."

Sairex glanced at Miroku, then narrowed his yellow eyes at Toga. "Toga..."

Toga's eyes darted to Miroku. Sairex sighed.

"Toga, my friend...I am training Miroku and vould trust him vith my life and more. Further, you zhould trust him too. He's practically your younger pup's zecond brother."

Toga sighed heavily, his expressionless facade - something he wasn't as good at maintaining as he liked to pretend - vanished. "Since he is to be your apprentice and I need your services, fine. There may come a time I need to rely on you, monk."

Miroku nodded, finishing the final knot in his robes. "It is an honor to be allowed to serve your House."

"The two of you will not discuss anything that you learn of this situation unless it is absolutely imperative to my Sesshoumaru's recovery, am I perfectly clear?"

"Kaa, of course. Now I'm all kinds of curious. Vhat's going on?"

Toga looked down, aware that he probably looked at least partly as guilty as he felt. "Prior to his...episode, Sesshoumaru and I were...being intimate."

Miroku was far more surprised than Sairex but, to his credit, did not react save an involuntary widening of violet eyes.

Sairex paused, musing, as he gathered his leather satchel of supplies. "I zee. And I'm assuming you vere finished and den he just...fainted?"

"He convulsed. I saw the change occur. He was fine, and then he abruptly was not."

"I vill have to look at him. Come, Miroku."

The three of them headed down the hallway towards Toga's room. The taiyoukai was silent and barely avoided chewing his lip from nervousness and worry. Once inside the Lord of the castle's large bedchambers, Sairex set down his supplies and pointed accusingly towards the window, squinting at Miroku.

"See dose? Nice, dark, heavy drapes. I vant zome." Miroku rolled his eyes and opened the drapes in question, letting some sunlight in so that Sairex could take a look at Sesshoumaru. The raven eyed the inu critically, pulling the sheet down to his waist. He sighed. "Vell, I found da problem."

"What is it?" Toga almost grabbed the raven but refrained.

"Look at dis." Sairex gestured to the angry red bite scar Tsetsukosei had left. Faint red lines traced away from the puncture points. "Zee dese little lines? Its poison in his blood."

"I did not believe Lord Sesshoumaru could be poisoned..." Miroku said with a frown.

"Kaa...vell. Da lines are fading. It is likely his natural defenses are beating da venom down. Tsetsukosei's bite injected lots of toxin. It's released vhen da victim experiences...er..." Sairex cast a glance at Toga. "Enough physical pleasure. Den, da toxin ztops being dormant and hits da bloodstream. Its zupposed to kill painfully, but...Zezzhoumaru has zuch ztrong natural defense against poison dat his body can handle it but not avoid da initial zhock."

Toga frowned deeply, staring at the ground. Sairex eyed him for a long moment before turning his attention to Miroku.

"Miroku, let me zee your ztaff, please."

Miroku blinked and handed his staff to the raven. Sairex promptly whacked Toga over the head with it, drawing a surprised growl from the taiyoukai and a wide-eyed gasp from Miroku.

"Toga! Ztop blaming yourself for dis. You didn't know dis vould happen. Its only your doing on a very zmall technicality. Doesn't count. You didn't put da poison dere, you didn't know vhat vould trigger it."

Toga glared at Sairex before sighing. "I know, I know...so how do we fix it? I've seen the same mark on you, long ago. It is not there now."

Sairex frowned uneasily. "Vell...it vas never pleasant to remove. I had to cut out da flesh vell around each hole and burn out any traces of da venom vith acid."

Miroku stared slack-jawed at Sairex, not even wanting to think about how painful it would be to carve huge chunks out of yourself, let alone pour acid on the wounds. "How...many times did he mark you?"

Sairex grinned slightly. "Every time I took it off. He considered me...and probably ztill does tink of me...as his mate. I never exactly zhared his viewpoint."

"Is there any way to get this mark and this venom out of my pup short of gouging it out of his flesh?" Toga asked with a frown. Sairex sat for a long moment, considering.

"Vell...I don't know. I vas never able to come up vith a vay before, but...I vill tink on it. For now...he'll be zafe enough as long as...er..."

"Understood. You do understand I appreciate your discretion in this matter." Toga's tone clearly warned just how much he would not appreciate indiscretion.

"Kaa, of course, of course." Sairex waved him off, digging through his bag. He mixed a few things together and then handed the bowl of powder to Toga. "Here. Put dis in vater and have him drink it vhen he vakes up. It'll make him feel a bit better."

"Thank you."

"I really don't know of a vay to remove da venom vithout cutting it out. It is painful, but if he can handle it...of course, I could do da cutting myzelf and just keep him unconscious. He'd never feel a ting."

"I will ask him what he wishes done when he wakes."

"What I wish done about what?" Sesshoumaru mumbled groggily.

Sairex glanced at Toga before filling Sesshoumaru in on what had happened and the only solution he knew of. Sesshoumaru stared at him, his eyes narrowing.

"You didn't think to tell me sooner that I could be rid of this damn scar, raven?" A low, angry growl rumbled in his chest. Toga rested his hand on Sesshoumaru's shoulder.

"I vas unavare dat y ou had it. You keep it hidden."

"Hn. Fine. Cut it off me."

"Er...right now?" Sairex blinked.

"I don't want this damn thing a moment longer if you can take it off! Do it or I will damn well do it myself!"

"Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru flinched at his father's reprimand and then sighed. "Forgive me, Sairex."

"Kaa, no vorries. I underztand. Mmm. Come, come...ve go to da healer's chambers, I need tings from dere and it vill be easier to clean up. You two..." Sairex gestured to Miroku and Toga, "You two vill need to find zometing elze to do. I vill need to concentrate."

Toga looked incredibly reluctant to let his pup go off to be hacked up without his supervision, but Sesshoumaru gave him a glance. "I will be fine, my Lord Father. And if I am not, surely you can destroy one little raven."

Sairex chuckled. "Indeed, indeed...come." Sairex escorted Sesshoumaru from the room. Miroku glanced at Toga, who was staring at the door as if he intended to dart out immediately after them.

"You trust him, right?" Miroku asked quietly. Toga nodded.

"Absolutely. I just...still feel badly."

"It is not your fault, m'lord. Had you known, you likely would have withheld yourself...and ultimately, not that you asked my opinion, I feel Lord Sesshoumaru needed this."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "Oh really..."

"Emotional bonding, love, and someone to prove to him that all is not so dire as his past experience has dictated. Yes. I know he had some sort of intimacy with Inuyasha, but that is different. No one else can be who you are to him. He submits to no one else. Where he can find enjoyment with Inuyasha, I believe he will find more peace with you. And perhaps things will go from there."

"Mm. You are very open minded for a human. Most of youkai society will not accept this union should they find out. They may even be incited to rebellion."

"Eh. I'm not your average human. I suppose I will go to the kitchen and see what I can do with the herbs I have. I can probably make something to help the pain he'll be in..."

"Good. Thank you. I suppose I will tend to some of the duties I have been neglecting. Thank you, Miroku."

"Oh, anything I can do to help. Oh...er...sorry about the staff thing. I didn't know what he wanted it for."

Toga rolled his eyes and chuckled a bit. "That bird is something else. You are good for each other."

Miroku smiled. "Thank you."

Toga nodded. "I shall see you at dinner, then."

With a nod, Miroku departed.

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A/N - The more scientific reason for why Tsetsukosei's venom works has to do with the chemicals released into the body during orgasm. The venom reacts with them and turns what is normally a burst of pleasure-happiness chemicals and twists it into pain instead. Pleasure and pain are very closely related on a chemical level.

However, smart as Sairex is, he doesn't know the technical explanation.


	55. Chapter 54

Pride (In the Name of Love) 54 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mmm, time for dinner. This is largely a chapter of various results, tying up some loose ends, as it were. This chapter is a little short out of necessity - it was a great place to end it and my time today to write is not what I wish it was.

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Dinner was a rather tense affair. Sairex and Sesshoumaru were absent - apparently, it was going to take the raven a bit longer than previously predicted. Toga was fidgety and tense - trust Sairex as he might, he didn't like knowing that the raven was doing something terribly painful and rather gruesome to his pup.

The kitchen staff, as always, served a fabulous meal. Fruits, meats, soups, and the demon-tea Sesshoumaru and Toga favored, all if it expertly prepared and artfully arranged.

Inuyasha and Kouga dug into their meal with healthy appetites, as usual. Miroku sipped quietly at a bowl of soup and nibbled at some various fruits, but he was desperately curious as to how things were going with his lover. Toga was more than curious. It was all the agitated inu could do not to leap to his feet and start pacing.

It was with some surprise that Miroku noted Toga did NOT tackle Sairex immediately as the raven walked into the room. His hair was tied back and damp - he appeared to have just come from the bath. // Probably was a mess... // Miroku thought. He watched as Inuyasha, Kouga, and especially Toga all flinched. Inuyasha frowned in alarm and leapt to his feet, hand going to the hilt of Tetsusaiga.

"Shit...what'd you do to my brother? Bathe in his blood?" He growled dangerously, prepared to cut down Sairex where he stood. A sharp warning growl from his father melted some of Inuyasha's ire, however.

"Father...he smells like blood, A lot of it. SESSHOUMARU'S blood. And I want to know what the hell is going on. You've been awfully jumpy all evening."

Sairex smiled tiredly. "Vell. I hacked him to pieces. However, he is zleeping peacefully in your bed." Here he nodded to Toga. "As far as I know, da operation vas a complete zuccess. He'll heal at his normal rate and zhould be almost if not completely better by morning."

"What the FUCK? Why are you chopping up my brother?!"

"Inuyasha, enough!" Toga growled. Inuyasha, however, largely ignored the command in favor of glaring at Sairex.

"At ease, Lord Inuyazha. I did noting to harm your brother. I removed Zetsukosei's scar from him, it just...vas a bit messier dan I could easily deal vith. Zo yes, despite bathing, I'm zure to your more zensitive demon noses you can ztill zmell his blood-zcent on me. I'm zorry for dat, but I assure you, it vas unavoidable."

"You fixed that damn scar? Truly?"

"Yes. He zhould be fine in a few hours."

Toga's eyes narrowed. "And what about YOU, Sairex? Why are YOU bleeding?" Miroku blinked in alarm.

Sairex grinned ruefully. "Vell...lets just zay I learned da hard vay to tie him down before taking a knife to him. He clawed my arm pretty good." Noting the horribly alarmed look on his lover's face, he continued hastily. "Oh, Miroku, don't vorry zo much. I'll be fine by morning myzelf."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "I thought you were going to render him unconscious?"

"I did. But he lashed out in zubconscious defense of himzelf. I tink knowing dat I vas ztanding dere vith a knife I meant to use on him put his mind on too high of an alert."

"Thank you, my friend." Toga said with a slight grin.

"Kaa, don't mention it. All I did, any healer could have done. I just knew vhat to do from experience vas all."

"Maybe I should simply promote you to healer as well as advisor."

"Kaa, no. I'm not zo good at healing. I knew vhat to do in dis case, and I know lots of herb-lore, but my knowledge is otherwise very, very basic. Not really vhat you vant. I'm a much better zeer."

Toga nodded and stood after finishing the rest of his tea. "If you will all excuse me, I believe I will retire early in case my Sesshoumaru needs something."

Sairex held forth a packet. "Zhould he vake early, put dis in zometing and have him drink it, it vill numb da pain."

"Indeed, thank you." Toga glanced around before snagging the pot of tea and a couple of cups. "This will do." After bidding everyone a good night again, he headed off to his bedchambers, feeling inordinately weary. // Probably from all the stress... I'm so relieved all went well. Perhaps my pup is truly free of that beast's curse now. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Riinnnnn!"

Rin blinked as Shippo hammered on her door. Her and the kitsune had become fast friends ever since he had come to live in the castle. Rin got into far less trouble than Shippo did, however - mostly because she obeyed Sesshoumaru's every command to the letter whether or not her lord was there to see her do so. "You can come in."

Shippo hurried into the room and shut the door. "Rin...I found...the best potion ever. But I don't know who to use it on."

Rin blinked. "Potion? What does it do?"

"It turns men into women. I don't know if it works the other way, but probably."

Rin stared at him. "What...what are you going to do with it?"

"I dunno...who do you think I should give it to?"

"You could ask..."

Shippo rolled his eyes. "No, Rin, I meant sneak it to someone."

"But wouldn't that be a terribly big surprise?"

"Well, that's the point! Do you think Inuyasha would kill me?"

"He would chop off your tail and feed it to the wolves."

"And what if I gave it to the wolf?"

"I don't know how Inuyasha would feel about that." Rin blinked. "Isn't it kind of mean to go around randomly transforming people?"

"Nah. Do you have a problem being a girl?"

Rin blinked, then smiled. Well, no, she didn't! In fact, she rather enjoyed it. Maybe it was alright after all. "Ok, what do you need me to help you with?" Since it was a good thing to be a girl and all, she would aid the kitsune.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"My dear Lady, how long will it take for Tsetsukosei to be fully restored?"

Karalichala gave Jormandar an irritated glare before speaking. She hated the common tongue of the Circle demons, it came so awkwardly to her... "It vill take zeveral moon-cycles, but it has begun. My vork is done in dis regard."

"I see...and so what now for you?"

"Hn. Jormandar, are you a fool? I vill go into hiding. I have no vish to fail after coming zo far."

"And how, pray, will you hide from him? It was one thing when Sairexannaras did not know you existed...it's quite another when he has a personal vendetta against you and you bear a part of him inside you. Would it not be better to remain here? I may be able to offer you some measure of protection."

Karalichala sneered at him and then turned, striding from the room without looking back. She had her own plans. She had survived this long by not being a fool, and, while it had been a risk...she had no regrets about her assault on Sairex. She would simply have to lie low until the child was born, and then go from there.

However, Jormandar's point was valid. How, indeed, would she hide from Sairex? He had long ago developed ways to track his kindred. It would be even easier for him to find her with his child in her belly. She had no doubt that her life was probably forfeit should the other raven catch her. True, she had absorbed a formidable amount of power...had studied hard and excelled in many different forms of magic. But she was not the first exemplary member of her clan. She was, however, the last...and this bothered her terribly. Sairex had cut down all the others.

And Sairex had further reason to bear a personal grudge against her. She had killed the human that shared his bed and likely meant something to him.

Karalichala paused, wondering if he would kill the babe. // I suppose it depends on how far along it is. Should he catch me soon, I have no doubt he'll simply destroy me. Should I actually have the child...well, we'll see. There is no research to tell me if he ever killed a child. Our clan was small and children left to live so rare...//

She walked across her dark laboratory, lighting a pair of torches and beginning to pull ingredients off of shelves, mixing them carefully. // Speeding up this pregnancy will do wonders for me. I should bear the child before Tsetsukosei is freed of my bonds...which is good. I do not want to risk retaliation from the lich while I am incapacitated. Oh, but this child had best be male...I don't want to have to consider finding a way to strike at the Deathraven again. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru's eyes slowly flickered open. He was warm and content, snuggled up against a warm body with the blissful warmth of a furry mokomoko coiled around him, and his father's comforting scent everywhere. Where Sairex had cut him his skin felt a little tight, but there was no pain. He had slept through the night.

Rather eager to see the results of the raven's handiwork, he opened his eyes and reached for the bandages...and froze in place, shocked into complete stillness.

It was not his father he was snuggled up to.

It was a woman.

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A/N - The reason the lovely little potion did not work immediately was because it was not a solid, concentrated dose, but rather dispersed throughout the contents of...well. Toga and Sesshoumaru's tea. Sesshy, however, slept through it...Inuyasha and Kouga aren't tea people...and Miroku's got no interest in demonic tea. Who knows what's in it? XD


	56. Chapter 55

Pride (In the Name of Love) 55 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - For those that were confused about Shippo's discussion with Rin - he does not have any idea that the potion he accidently broke was put into play and is still just plotting what to do with his one vial.

On another note, I got a review yesterday on mediaminer that said "OMG WTF IS WRONG WITH YOU!?" And proceeded to tell me that I desperately needed to see a shrink. My grammar, readability, overall enjoyment, and whatever else one can rate were all rated at 1/10. Made me giggle. A lot. Even if one does not like my story and DOES grasp my insanity...*huffs*... my spelling and grammar are NOT that bad. Hmph. XD It really did make me laugh though. Anyway, on with the insanity for all those that do not suffer from it but enjoy every moment as I do.

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Sesshoumaru couldn't bring himself to move for a long moment as he stared at the woman he was half tangled up with. His senses confounded him. Excepting the slight undertones that differentiated between male and female, the woman had the same scent as his father...and she looked as though she could be his twin. She was tall and graceful, with the same long silvery hair, the same markings on her face and body, the same twin mokomokos dangling behind her......

Sesshoumaru didn't know if he should avert his eyes or not. The woman was only wearing a loose pair of pants that seemed entirely too big on her. Had his father been rendered female, this was precisely what he would have imagined.

Except his father was very much NOT female, he knew that for a fact. That didn't change the fact that he woke up with a half-naked woman in his father's image snuggled up to his chest with a long leg threaded between his own. Although he hadn't made it here to bed on his own...in fact, this was his first time being conscious since Sairex had put him down to operate.

Sesshoumaru put the mystery of his bedmate on hold for just a moment as he yanked off his bandage and looked at his skin. All traces of the horrible bite-scar were gone, simply healing flesh that had been taken out in a neat, surgical line. The raven did have his uses...

The inu's eyes snapped back as the woman's eyelashes fluttered open. Golden eyes...his father's eyes. Sesshoumaru just stared helplessly. The woman's head cocked slightly to one side as she took in his earth-shattering confusion and helpless look, and the fact that his fingers were rigid and ready to strike if the need arose. "My Sesshoumaru? What..." She stopped abruptly, raising a hand to her throat.

Sesshoumaru couldn't believe it, but he had to ask. "My...my Lord Father...?"

"Of course. What..." Slowly golden eyes traveled down and flew impossibly wide as Toga scrambled to sit up, gawking at his...her...body. "What in all the hells?!" Frantically she poked and prodded bits of herself as if to deny their reality, not caring that some of it was more than a little inappropriate fondling. She cast a rather panicked look to Sesshoumaru.

"I don't know. When I woke, you were like this..."

"What...what sort of trickery is this?!"

Noting her expression and horrified for an instant that she might cry, Sesshoumaru hesitantly reached for her in a futile effort to console her. He had no answers for her, only just as many questions.

The door abruptly flew open. Inuyasha came in, looking somewhat agitated. "Hey, you guys need to ...oh, shit, I'm sorry...!" Inuyasha did a double-take mostly at the woman his brother was half-embracing. "S...Sessh, don't you think our father will be a little upset with you for having a woman in his bed?"

The hanyou yelped as he was hit in the back of the head with one of Toga's boots. He turned around and blinked, noting the female glaring at him. "Hey, what the hell..."

"This is my bed, damn it. I AM your father!"

Inuyasha REALLY hated to point out the obvious. "Um...but...."

"I don't know. That is what we were trying to figure out. What troubled you enough to come flying in here, though, pup?" Toga slowly rubbed her temples. Oh, she could feel a headache coming on alright.

"The...the guests are starting to arrive already and I'm not sure what to do with them."

"Guests?..." Toga asked.

Sesshoumaru groaned. "Oh, hells...the ball...I scheduled it for today. To announce your return as Lord of the West..."

"I can't be seen like this! Inuyasha, send them away!"

Sesshoumaru frowned. "Disregard that, Inuyasha." Toga looked at him in surprise. Inuyasha was nearly as shocked. Sesshoumaru, denying their father? Flat out disobeying him...er...her... at the same time? "If you send them away after we have told them we can prove a preposterous claim, that my Lord Father is indeed returned from the dead...and we not only fail to produce proof of such an outrageous thing and, indeed, simply send them away..."

Toga sighed. "Forgive me. You're right...but I cannot be seen thus. Send Sairex in."

"I'll tell em you got called away on some temporary business, and they're welcome to stay until your return. As for Sairex, he left with Miroku this morning and won't be back until tonight. Maybe tomorrow."

Toga scowled. "Of course...damn it all, what sort of attack is THIS?" She gestured frustratedly at her body.

"A brilliant one," Sesshoumaru murmured when Inuyasha left. "You are not incapacitated, but your credibility is destroyed - and without fighting you, which is a feat none will willingly perform. But should you still make the attempt to rule, your ideas and ideals may well be changed due to your...er...changes. You will be flustered and confused for sure, and angry...and may make poor decisions, thus leaving some angry rival with a crack in the armor of our House."

Toga scowled darkly. "Just because I'm a woman I have to be moody?"

"Are you not?"

"I have damn good reason to be."

"I am sure we can figure out a way to deal with this. Until we do, I shall remain with you." Sesshoumaru calmly walked over and locked the door before returning to bed.

"Your scar is healing nicely." Toga noted with a smile. "And what is it you intend to do all day? We cannot very well remain in bed."

Sesshoumaru shrugged. "Why not? It is one of the most secure locations in the castle, guarantees you will not be seen, and is a place we can wait in comfort for the raven to return that we might ask him of your state."

Toga smirked slightly. "I think you just want to take advantage of me now that I am female." Sesshoumaru blinked at the accusation, pausing midway back into his customary position in the bed.

"I would never do such a thing."

"Am I not attractive like this? You think I'm ugly." Sesshoumaru gaped in growing horror as he saw tears welling up in Toga's eyes and her lip quivering.

Toga couldn't help it. Hell, if she was going to be stuck like this for a while, she may as well make the best of things. Besides, Sesshoumaru WAS fun to tease, being as uptight as he usually was...

"Wh...no, I do not! You are a very attractive female! I simply would not take advantage of your current state."

"I am uninjured and in my right mind, despite the fact I have had a few physical changes. Relax, my Sesshoumaru. I am only playing. Although you do look terribly cute when you're all flustered."

"Are you sure you are in your right mind?" Sesshoumaru muttered, aware that he was blushing. There was that damned 'cute' word again. Toga merely chuckled and leaned against him.

"Alright, I'll quit teasing you."

Sesshoumaru paused, unaware of how to phrase his current problem. Nothing tactful came to mind, however, so he decided being blunt would work just fine. "If quitting teasing me is truly your intent...I suggest you put a shirt on prior to laying against me."

Toga blinked and looked down. The fact that females - and thus herself at present - had a rather bouncy frontside had really escaped her. It simply wasn't something she was used to having to worry about. "Ok. That particular aspect of my teasing truly was unintentional." Toga struggled against the sudden urge to poke, prod, and otherwise experiment with her current body.

A thought occurred to her then. "What if I am stuck like this?"

"Then you will be Lady of the West instead and they will learn to fear you anew in short order." Sesshoumaru's tone was matter-of-fact and his eyes were tactfully averted to staring at a spot on the ceiling. Toga chuckled and simply pulled up the sheet before yawning and stretching out against Sesshoumaru again. Just because she was stuck in this body did not mean she was going to change all her habits...and Toga rather enjoyed snuggling.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Are you sure we should be doing this? Rin does not know if Lord Sesshoumaru would approve..."

Shippo grinned and began digging curiously through the large leather bag on the shelf. "Eh, don't worry so much, Rin. It will be fine. Wow, I bet we could make some really cool stuff...."

Rin eyed all the various unidentifiable powders and liquids Shippo was pulling out of Sairex's bag. "Rin really does not think this is such a good idea...what are these things?"

"Oh, smushed up flowers, mostly, I'm sure."

Rin frowned. Flowers were pretty, not meant to be smushed up!

"Ooh, look at this!" Shippo pulled out a small leather-bound book and flipped it open. He stared at it a while, flipping pages. He then turned the book sideways...then upside down.

"What is it?"

"Er....I'm not sure."

"What does it say?"

"That's why I'm not sure." Shippo handed over the book. It was written in Sairex's neat, spidery hand...and all of it with unfamiliar symbols and script.

"Oh. Rin can not read this."

"Me either. Never saw writing like that before."

"It's probably a recipe book." Rin smiled, picking up a container and pointing to the label, which matched a line on the page. "See? These match."

Shippo's eyes lit up. "That's great! We can just match up the symbols then and make some really cool potions!" He rubbed his hands together gleefully. Rin blinked.

"But we do not know what they will do."

Shippo realized he was about to lose his partner in crime. He smiled slyly. "What if you made Sesshoumaru a really awesome potion that made him stronger?"

"Sesshoumaru-sama always says he needs nothing he does not already have to be strong. He would never even use those jewel shards."

"What if you made him a potion of....er....happiness then?"

Rin blinked. "How will we know if it's a potion of happiness?" That DID sound rather nice...

Got her. "We can test it, of course!" He said with a grin. "I'm sure you can pick out a good one."

The two flipped through the book until they decided on a recipe with only a handful of ingredients. Rin was surprisingly adept at picking the correct vials from the pile, and Shippo was soon mixing, stirring, and squishing things together.


	57. Chapter 56

Pride (In the Name of Love) 56 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Sigh...sometimes I wish I wasn't so evil. But then, you wouldn't have much of a plot. Oh well. =D

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"I ztill vish you vould not have come."

"Sairex," Miroku chided gently, "You still have a lot of recovering to do. I won't let you run off by yourself."

"Kaa. Vell, if you inzist on coming vith me, I can at least make good on a promise I made you a long vhile ago."

Miroku arched an eyebrow, watching as the raven sat down on a rock and began plucking a few things from his satchel - Sairex always seemed to have a bag of some sort filled with fascinating things on his person - and placing them in the center of a small square of black leather. He then reached back to his wing and plucked out two feathers - one mid-size one and one tiny downy one. The small one he added to the little pile on the leather and the other he set aside.

When he was finished murmuring a few soft words, he glanced at Miroku. "Give me a piece of your hair." The monk complied, watching as it was added to the bundle. Sairex made a few more rapid gestures and then tied the whole thing up with a long leather thong. "Here ve go. Put dis around your neck."

Miroku did, eyeing the small bundle curiously. "What is it for?"

"Vell...I told you once I vould zhow you how to fly. And I tink, vhere ve need to go, being able to fly vould be a good ting. I'm not zure I'm ztrong or fast enough to protect you. My powers are ztill half dormant."

Miroku eyed the talisman skeptically. "And this little thing is going to let me fly?"

"Kaa, no...its zimply da focus for my zpell. I vill loan you my vings." Smiling, Sairex picked up the larger feather he had set aside earlier. He spread his wings out, closed his eyes, and blew gently on the feather.

Miroku stared as the spell took effect. The feathers on Sairex's wings were detaching, vanishing into thin air as they blew from his wings like dead leaves off a tree in autumn. Miroku saw bare bones dissolving as well, but then his entire perspective seemed to warp and change. Everything suddenly seemed to be getting bigger...his robe yawned up to swallow him, his staff hit the ground and his hands stopped working...

In surprised near-panic, the monk thrashed around. He blinked rapidly when the thick and heavy cloth was pulled from his head, ruffling his feathers indignantly and letting out a squawk.

That set him back even further. Miroku scrambled backwards a few steps and almost fell. He tilted his head to look at himself, shocked. He had been turned into a raven.

Sairex was kneeling in front of him, amusement dancing across his impish features. "Trust me, my dear Miroku, it is much easier to fly as a true bird dan as a vinged humanoid. You vould have no tail to help balance and your body vould be built oddly."

Miroku found, after a couple false attempts, that he could talk. "This isn't permanent, I hope." He walked forward a bit, wings trailing out to either side as he tried not to stumble. "And you look odd without wings. I'm too used to it."

Sairex chuckled and abruptly scooped Miroku up as he stood. "No, it's not permanent. Much as I love you, I don't really vant to give up my raven form to you. But I vill let you borrow it. Flying is zometing everyone zhould experience, in my opinion."

Miroku nodded and gathered his feet under him. It was strange, having legs that bent backwards! "Well, I best get to flying, then..." Miroku leapt forward and beat his wings frantically. Sairex barely caught him before he hit the ground.

"Careful, careful...you may have da body of a bird but you ztill have da knowledge and inztincts of a human. You are trying entirely too hard. Here..." Sairex set Miroku down and then carefully showed him how to spread his wings and feathers properly and how turning them would alter how he rode wind currents.

After Sairex's flight tutorial, Miroku was ready to try again. He clambered up on the rock and flexed his wings before getting a small running start and hopping off. This time he caught a breeze and was far more successful. Soon the monk-turned-raven was flying in circles around the area, absolutely delighted. Sairex chuckled to himself in amusement as he sat down and began mixing a few other things, leaning back against the rock as he set the blood-red mixture next to him and settled in to wait. He winced when Miroku, attempting some sort of barrel roll, almost crashed into a tree. "Hey, be careful! I need dat body back vhen you're done vith it, you know!"

Eventually Miroku decided he needed a rest and flew earthward. He abruptly remembered they hadn't discussed landing techniques and so he developed one of his own - flap frantically to slow down your speed as you crash into Sairex's chest. Sairex caught him, barely.

"That was...amazing. Thank you, Sairex..."

"Don't mention it. I tink it best if you ztay like dat until I finish vith my errands."

"Is it really going to be that dangerous?" Miroku perched on Sairex's knee and carefully folded up his wings.

"Yes. Vell...it has da potential to be, anyvay."

"Alright...what is that god-awful looking stuff in the bowl there?"

"Mm. Demon bait."

Miroku blinked. "Demon..bait?"

"Zpecifically, it zmells of da blood of vounded humans."

"Why... are you trying to attract a human-hungry demon, Sairex?" Miroku was confused and uneasy by the revelation. Sairex sighed.

"Miroku...I need to remind you. I am a demon. I am not all flowers and zunshine and happy-love. I am involved, not entirely by choice, in zome very bad tings. Right now, I intend to go to da Circle. Vhen I get dere, I vill pick up zome tings and use a zcrying pool I know of in an effort to find da one dat attacked me and carries my child. I vill not move against her now, but I vill zoon."

Miroku nodded. "Alright, fair enough. But that doesn't explain to me why you need to lure in a demon."

Sairex snorted. "Vell, if I'm correct, it vill zave our lives. If I'm not, den I rid da vorld of a human-hungry demon anyvays. Da vay I zee it, not much to lose."

"Sounds fine to me." Miroku couldn't help but jump a bit as a loud rumble followed by a crash echoed through the underbrush nearby. "Well. Looks like you found one." A thought occurred to the transformed monk just then and he flapped his wings anxiously. "Wait a second, how are you going to...you aren't armed or anything! Change me back so I can use my ofuda and help you...please..."

Sairex's voice was soft. "I am always armed. And I do not vant you damaging its body vith your ofuda...nor do I vish to mess vith holy zeals. I am ztill a demon and dey vould give me trouble."

A massive bear youkai burst from the undergrowth then, roaring and standing up on its hind legs as it noticed Sairex standing before it. Miroku winced as the beast charged madly towards them. Sairex had made no move yet.

Sairex slowly shifted his stance as if bracing himself, yellow eyes suddenly flaring intently. The bear's charge slowed and then stopped altogether. A look of confusion splayed itself on the twisted creature's face and its muscles trembled. Miroku watched, stunned, as the bear jerkily lifted one massive paw off the ground. It growled defiantly at Sairex...and then tore out its own throat, crumpling in a heap.

The raven walked away from the bear and buried the contents of his bait-bowl, not bothering to speak. Miroku was silent, his eyes never leaving the dead beast. It bothered him not at all that the world was one less bear demon short. But it had never, ever occurred to him that Sairex's mental domination could do something so drastic. The raven had taken over his body before, too...what could he have made him do? A shudder ran through the monk at the thought., even though he knew Sairex would never hurt him.

"I vould love to reassure you dat I am not a greatly evil beast, Miroku, but ve do not have da time. Ve have to get back to da castle for da ball."

"I don't think you're evil. I'm just a bit...stunned. Surprised is all. I've never seen anything like that. So...how is this going to help us?"

"I vill zend it into my portal first. Dere is likely going to be a trap zet to my zpecific magical zignature. Rather dan trigger it ourselves..."

"Er...how will you send it if its dead?"

Sairex chuckled and set Miroku on his shoulders. "My clan vere necromancers, by and large. And vhile I vas alvays poor at manipulating da dead...I'm not entirely incapable. Once I finish da zpell, ve vill go into da Circle."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The potion was bubbling, a deep angry red. It smelled vaguely like cinnamon and roses. Shippo couldn't have been happier with it and kept sniffing at it eagerly, wondering how it would taste.

"Do you think it's done yet?"

"Rin doesn't know, she never made potions before. But it does smell pretty tasty."

"It's been bubbling for a while. I think it must be done." Shippo nodded sagely and scooped out a bowlful, setting it aside to cool. "I wonder what it will do!"

"How will we know if it is a happiness potion?" Rin eyed the bowl of red liquid suspiciously.

"Well, I'm going to drink it. And we'll see how I feel when I'm done." Shippo grinned.

"What if it is not something good?" Rin asked with a frown.

"Come on, do you think anything that smells that good can be bad?"

Rin frowned, uneasy. She hadn't really thought this was a good idea from the start. What would Lord Sesshoumaru say? Oh, he would probably be quite angry...will be angry when she admitted what she did. Rin knew already that she felt too guilty to NOT tattle on herself.

Shippo distracted her from her thoughts as he snatched up the bowl. "Well, here goes!"

"Wait! Don't!"

Rin was too late - Shippo downed the contents of the bowl in one long, quick swallow.

Nothing happened.

The kitsune set down the bowl and licked his lips, grinning. "Mm...that was pretty good..."

"Do you feel...happy?" Rin asked hesitantly. Maybe this wasn't so bad after all...

"Well, no more than I did before I drank it, really...Huh. I don't think it did anyth--" Shippo's body jerked abruptly, his teeth clacking together and cutting off his speech abruptly.

"Shippo?" Rin asked hesitantly, eyeing the suddenly silent fox. Her eyes widened as he began to change. Shippo's back bowed until he was forced onto all fours. His bones were making the most horrible cracking noises as they realigned themselves. Thick, rust-colored fur burst from his skin. His clothing exploded into shreds as his body grew too large to contain it.

The girl stepped backwards slowly as the transformation finished. Shippo had fully become a fox, and his shoulders were nearly the height of her own. But the transformation hadn't stopped there. His teeth elongated and curved, no longer fitting neatly inside his jaws. Claws several inches long and dagger-sharp jutted from his paws. A line of bony, jagged spikes burst from his spine and much of his luxurious fox-fur began to fall out, revealing dark, discolored skin stretched over taut muscles. His eyes had turned to a deep crimson the color of blood.

With slavering jaws the mutated fox turned his head towards Rin. Rin found her throat too dry to scream and she dove for the nearest exit - a tall window leading out into one of the gardens.

She never made it. A ball of blue-green flame shot from the fox-beast's jaws and impacted with the wall where she had just been. The entire wall exploded in a shower of debris and Rin lost consciousness as a shower of stone and mortar pummeled her to the ground.

Shippo snarled angrily, his prey buried under a mound of rubble. His mind could not comprehend a way to dig it away from her. But the pair of wolves that had just loped around the corner....

With a snarl, the fox leapt at the startled guards. Powerful jaws crunched through the spine of the first, shattering it and leaving the yelping beast helpless on the ground. Bloody eyes turned to the next and he lunged again, the sweet taste of blood only serving to fuel his sudden rage.


	58. Chapter 57

Pride (In the Name of Love) 57 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mm...nothing too exciting to report here, really. This chapter isn't as good or as early as I wanted it...I got shanghaied when I got out of work and forced to do my mother's job for four hours...and I hurt. Terribly. So a somewhat poor update is better than none, I figured. ^^

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Kouga's ears twitched and he scrambled off the bed and dove towards the window at the sudden howl echoing across the courtyard. This had the unfortunate side effect of depositing Inuyasha rather roughly on the floor, nearly on his head, since the hanyou had been more or less on him at the moment.

"Ack! What the HELL..."

"Shut up, mutt...!" Kouga growled. "We're under attack!"

Inuyasha was on his feet in a moment. "By what?"

"Shit, I don't know...some sort of deranged demon. And there was some sort of explosion, took out a wall."

"How the hell did it get in?"

"Beats me! The perimeter was tight, the wolves should have noticed something...and its not like rabid demons are much good at sneaking over walls and past that damn flower-vine-thing your brother planted!" The vine in question had actually taken quite well and now covered most of the eastern wall and around parts of the north and south, providing a beautiful but deadly barrier.

"Fuck..." Inuyasha snatched up his sword and bolted out of the room. Kouga shot past him a moment later, rushing to aid his wolves.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Both Toga and Sesshoumaru flinched and shot to their feet the moment they heard the distant rumble of an explosion.

"What the hell was that?" Toga demanded, scrambling for a shirt and then cursing as her pants, which had fit her male body just fine, slid immediately down over her much narrower hips.

Sesshoumaru would have been far more amused - and interested - had the eerie noise of the wolf howls not caught his ears. "It seems we are being assaulted. Again." The younger inu snatched up his sword belt and headed for the door.

"I can't go out there like this..." Toga growled in frustration.

"Then remain here. I will attend the matter."

"Oh no. I am NOT helpless..." With a defiant growl, Toga kicked the offending and largely worthless clothes to the side and transformed into her full demon form, bounding out the door. Sesshoumaru was hot on her heels.

The younger taiyoukai passed her easily, however, when the faint scent of blood caught his sensitive nose. Human blood. Rin's blood.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The four of them reached the room at roughly the same time. Kouga shot into Sairex's room and was thrown back as another explosion rocked the room. Eerie green-blue flames hungrily consumed anything flammable. As it turned out, several of the things in Sairex's supplies were not only flammable but highly explosive. Some things were releasing various colors of smoke, none of which the inus or Kouga cared to test breathing.

The wall leading outside was almost completely obliterated. Sesshoumaru dove at the pile of rubble and began tearing things off of it.

After regaining his feet, Kouga leapt outside and skidded to a stop, Inuyasha right behind him. The twisted fox demon was surrounded by a ring of snapping, wary wolves and a few wolf demons. Several lay injured and more than a few were dead. Of the injured, most were fatally wounded, with snapped spines or torn throats.

Inuyasha hefted Tetsusaiga and glared at the mutated beast. "I don't know how you got in here, you bastard, but I'll--" Slowly, he stopped dead, sniffing, his eyes widening in disbelief.

"What the hell are you waiting for?" Kouga demanded, taking a cursory sniff himself.

Around the scent of wrong and bloodlust, Inuyasha detected the familiar scent of his kitsune companion. "Shippo?..."

"How can that thing be...fuck...you're right..." Kouga stared in disbelief.

"That is your kitsune friend?" Inuyasha and Kouga jumped at the deep growl of Toga's voice. Inuyasha nodded once.

"I think so. I just don't know how..."

Meanwhile, Sesshoumaru finally succeeded in finding Rin. The girl was much battered and one arm was clearly broken in several places. However, she was alive. She had been close to the wall when it had fallen, and the base of it had kept most of her body in a narrow hollow, preventing her from being crushed. Her eyes flickered open after a moment and she gasped, tears filling her eyes. "Rin..."

"S...Sesshoumaru-sama...Rin is so sorry..."

"Hush. What happened here?"

"Shippo and I made a potion and he drank it and it turned him mean...then he tried to eat me."

Toga had heard and seen enough. With one powerful leap, she dove over the wolves and tackled the snapping fox to the ground. Shippo clawed and bit and thrashed wildly, but eventually the much heavier inu - with the help of Kouga and the other wolf demons, held him subdued. Inuyasha scowled and then delivered a sharp blow to the back of the raging kitsune's skull with the hilt of Tetsusaiga, and the beast mercifully slid into unconsciousness.

Rin had slid unconscious again herself, and Sesshoumaru lifted her carefully. "We need that damn raven to come back. For now...throw the fox in the dungeons and make sure he can't escape until we find a way to...fix this."

Kouga was kneeling next to a badly torn wolf, tears stinging his eyes. Inuyasha gently rested a hand on his shoulder, offering what support he could. "Come on...I'll help you get them to the healers or...or whatever you need to do."

With everyone else appropriately distracted, Toga slid away. After all...they were demons, and even with the disguise of an inu body, if they focused on her, they'd notice the female tone of her scent. Her boys were taking care of the situation, after all, and would be fine without her.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku eyed the walking corpse of the bear demon warily. Sairex seemed entirely unalarmed, however. "Don't vorry zo much, love. I promise, it's entirely under control." Even as he spoke, he was murmuring and making swift, practiced gestures. A portal opened in the air before him. "And here ve go. Ztay close to me, but fly like 'ell if zometing happens."

"Something better not happen."

"Never know." Sairex made another gesture and the bear zombie shambled to the portal and started heading through. The explosion was almost deafening, and the beast fell, charred, the front half of it obliterated. Sairex smirked. "Told you dere vould be a trap."

"How do you know there isn't another one?"

Sairex paused, then kicked part of the bear's dismembered body further into the portal. There was no ensuing destruction. "Ve're clear."

Miroku shuddered and ruffled his feathers, crouching down tighter against Sairex's shoulder where he was perched. He really didn't care for the shadowy atmosphere or the hovering sense of impending doom of the Circle. Sairex, however, seemed right at home. He scooped Miroku into his arms against his chest and took off at a run, bouncing lightly off rocks and fallen tree limbs. Despite the raven-demon's speed, the journey took some time and he was breathing hard as a tall castle came into view.

"What is that, Sairex?"

Sairex grinned a bit. "Mm. Home."

Miroku stared at him. "You have a CASTLE?"

"Vell...I don't use it much. I vasn't able to. Zetsukosei's ztupid binding usually kept me from being able to get here." Sairex walked up the empty drawbridge. The moat below them seethed with dark, bubbling liquid. At the gate, a pair of massive obsidian statues, armed and armored, barred the way. However, one word from Sairex and the constructs animated and stepped to the side to admit him.

Miroku was in awe. The castle was dark - everything in the Circle seemed to be - but it had an air about it that just seemed to fit the crazy raven. If he had lips, he probably would have been smiling.

The two entered the throne room. Almost immediately, a small black form screeched and flew at Sairex's face. It was another raven.

"Ezkrai! Ouch, ztop dat!" The raven was screeching and pecking at him angrily. "Look, calm down...I zaid I vas zorry for being gone zo much..."

The raven calmed slightly and sat on Sairex's outstretched arm, although Miroku had the impression the bird was extremely indignant and put out.

"Ezkrai, dis is Miroku. Miroku, dis is Ezkrai, da Vatcher of my cas..." He was cut off by a sharp screech from Eskrai. "Vell, of course he looks just like me. He's borrowing my body." The raven narrowed her eyes indignantly and cawed at him. "Oh, don't be dat vay. He's my mate."

Miroku had the urge to back off as the raven hopped and screeched. Sairex rolled his eyes. "Don't mind her, Miroku, zhe just vorries about me....vhat? Ezkrai, don't be dat vay. If I vanted a raven, you vould be da first I vent to, I promise. Miroku usually is not like dis, I promise. He's human."

"She can understand us?" At Eskrai's withering glance, Miroku huddled down a bit further.

"Oh, yes. Ez, you just have to get used to dis....he's not going avay."

Miroku hopped down next to the angrily glaring female raven and then bent one wing and swooped into the most dramatic bow he could muster before speaking in his most serious tone. "My beautiful Lady Eskrai...it is a pleasure to meet you. I am so sorry that my presence causes you any undue distress. If I were not so smitten with your Lord, I would surely do all I could to pursue a noble creature such as yourself. It would be an honor to have you bear my...eggs."

Sairex's eyebrows shot up as he stared at Miroku. Eskrai seemed to consider this, ruffling her feathers and gazing at Miroku suspiciously before calming down significantly, making a soft little chirp. Sairex burst out laughing. "Vell, I know dat...how do you tink he lured me in?"

Eskrai chirped smugly and Sairex blushed. "You are a dirty bird and I zhould punish you for dat. Honestly, you don't even have half da parts required for dat zort of ting, vhy do you tink like dat?....Vhat? No, you most certainly are NOT bearing his eggs! Da only one dat vould get to do dat is me, zo you just keep your claws to yourzelf."

"You can lay eggs?"

"Er...vell, no, but it vas da point of da matter. Eh? Oh, quiet, you...go make yourzelf useful and get me my cryztals."

Eskrai tossed a loving coo Miroku's way before flapping off, vanishing down a dark hallway. Sairex rolled his eyes and huffed.

"You have a lovely retainer."

"Maybe I zhould take back my bird form before you get too many ideas. It zounded like you've used dat line before, about egg-bearing."

Miroku did his best to look serene. "No, I can safely say I have never asked that of another."

"Vhat zort of monk are you, exactly?"

"I am offended by the nature of your question."

"No you aren't. You know vay too many very...unmonkly tings."

"And you love each and every one of them. I am a man of the world and learned many things in my pilgrimage."

Sairex snorted. "All in da name of your Buddha, I'm zure..."

"I seem to be able to make you scream for the gods. And it IS a monk's duty to help spread religion."

Sairex blushed deeply. "Bah, maybe I zhould have let you have Ez...da two of you are going to make me burst blood vessels...."


	59. Chapter 58

Pride (In the Name of Love) 58 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - On an unrelated note, I hate my life. FML. Totally. That being said... I suppose I'll muddle my way through another chapter. I *MAY* or may not skip out on tomorrow's morning update - I've had a brutal week at work, my mother has seriously compounded my agony ((to make a long story short, she abuses me horribly but I have no where else to go cause I lost my house. Ugh..)) and...yeah. So I'm kinda planning on coming home tomorrow and just crashing, sleeping alllll day. I need it. But we'll see how I feel in the morning when I get home. Maybe I'll be up to the task after all? If there is no morning posting, that will be why.

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It was a long time before Sesshoumaru slid back into Toga's bedchamber. Toga herself was sitting in bed, propped against some pillows and gingerly dabbing at a deep scratch along one arm with a wet cloth. She paused and arched an eyebrow. "That took a bit longer than I thought."

Sesshoumaru sighed and set his sword belt down, plucking the cloth from Toga and beginning to tend her wounds himself. "After making sure the healers were taking care of Rin and helping take the injured wolves there as well, I tended to those that had been mortally wounded. I am debating simply firing the castle healers and taking over the position myself, with as much use as Tenseiga is getting and as much time as I have spent in the infirmary of late."

"Ah, yes, Sesshoumaru the Healer." Toga couldn't keep from smirking.

Sesshoumaru smirked himself. "I somehow do not think it would work out."

"Probably not. Although I'm sure the wolf prince is deeply grateful to you. He treats each and every one of his wolves as family, I've noticed."

"Indeed. My brother was rather profusely thankful as well...I gather that, despite their lack of official commitment, he and the wolf are something of an item."

"I believe so." Toga let out an abrupt hiss as Sesshoumaru switched to cleaning a gash on her cheek.

"I am sorry..." Sesshoumaru paused, apologetic.

"Not your fault. Minor wounds, all, even if some are a bit deep. That kitsune was a wild thing. I do hope something can be done outside of destroying him, poor little kit. How is Rin?"

"Resting. Outside of her broken arm, all she suffered were a few minor cuts and bruises. She was lucky. The healers expect her to fully recover, given time and proper care."

"Good, good...mm..." Toga felt her train of thought starting to derail. Sesshoumaru had abandoned the cloth and switched to gently licking her wounds, and it was proving to be quite a distraction. "My Sesshoumaru...?"

"Mmm?"

"I don't really care to be, but should I be stuck like this for a time...or even permanently...there is something you should probably know right now..."

Sesshoumaru paused. His own mind was growing pleasantly fuzzy from the delicious tang of blood wreaking havoc on his demonic senses. "What is that?"

Toga sighed, lightly combing her fingers through his long silvery h air. "Much as I love you and would not resist your...affections...you better be damned careful."

Sesshoumaru slowly raised his head, arching an eyebrow and peering at her. "Oh? Why is that?"

"Trust me when I tell you that I do not believe I would appropriately appreciate the irony of you fathering my pup."

Sesshoumaru blinked several times before bursting out laughing, shifting and leaning forward until he had her pinned on her back. "Well, when you come into heat, I will be sure to be cautious. I do not believe anyone in the palace could survive the mood swings pregnancy would bring you."

Toga snorted. "You'd be the first one I took out, I assure you."

"As if it would be entirely my fault."

"Of course it wouldn't. But I would be an irrationally hormonal female and blame you anyways."

Sesshoumaru paused to entertain a mental image of an irrational hormonal Toga destroying half the countryside and smirked. "This Sesshoumaru will not thus risk his life thus, I assure you. For the sake of the Western Lands as well as my own."

Toga snickered, although she rapidly began to lose focus again as Sesshoumaru resumed tending to her injuries. However, it was clear that such was not the only thing on the younger inu's mind, judging by the way he shifted from simply licking to gently nibbling and kissing a trail up to her sensitive ear, nipping at it gently. // I think...with Inuyasha's help, it would seem...we have created a monster. Although I can't say I mind overmuch... //

A sudden shocking desire sparked in her mind, although her logic warred against it. Never before had she considered even thinking of it, would have died first...but this was her Sesshoumaru. He would understand the gravity of this unspoken statement. With a soft sigh, Toga tipped her head, baring her throat to him and offering her submission.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex strode to the window and grandly gestured out of it after a moment. "Observe, Miroku...my murder."

"Your what?" Miroku hopped back in alarm. Sairex blinked, then smirked.

"My murder...oh, zilly monk, come here. Vhat did you expect to zee?" Sairex scooped Miroku up before the monk-turned-raven could retreat.

Miroku thought for a long moment and then abruptly felt sheepish. "Oh. Right. A group of crows is a murder...is it so for ravens?"

Sairex smirked. "Yes. All ravens ARE crows...but not all crows are ravens. Rooks, zame ting. Rooks are ravens, ravens are crows..." He shrugged. "Whoever decided naming tings was fun had a bit too much time and too many ideas on their hands vhen it came to my race. Anyvay...I raise da birds here and have quite da murder. Dey live in da top level of da castle. Zome are normal ravens....others are not. Most of dem are not demons, however. And most are not quite zo intelligent as Ezkrai, even if I can understand raven-zpeak."

Miroku perched in the windowsill and looked up. The sky was dark, but he could still make out a massive number of small, shadowy winged forms circling the uppermost towers. "Dear Buddha...there are so many!"

"Mm, dey are my eyes and ears. I have learned more from dem dan any other source."

"I see. That is wonderful."

"Indeed. One of da first tings I am going to teach you, if you ztill desire to learn from me dat is, is to speak da tongue of my clan. Your own language is not my native tongue. I can't cast my zpells vith it, and none of da books I vish to zhow you are written in it."

"Well, that certainly would make things more convenient."

Eskrai chose that moment to fly back in the room. She had a small black leather pouch clutched tightly in her talons and she handed it over to Sairex before perching on his unoccupied shoulder.

"Tank you, Ez. Actually, Miroku, zcrying is one of da first tings I intend to teach you besides my tongue...but not of da zort I'm going to do right now. Vhen I zhow you how, it von't be looking for a powerful enemy dat just might be able to ztrike me back in the process."

"You really think this demoness you see is that strong?"

Sairex nodded. "If zhe didn't tink zhe might ztand half a chance against me, zhe vould not have revealed herzelf. I did not know zhe vas alive. And to be alive dis long after da rest of da clan...zhe is both intelligent and powerful. Zhe had to have had help, but ztill...powerful." As he spoke, Sairex flipped open the pouch and pulled out a set of small blue crystals.

"And those are?"

"Focal cryztals. Normally I vouldn't need dem, but if I channel my zcrying into dem inztead of zimply channeling it, dey vill take da first attack and give me time to back out vithout my identity being confirmed or zuffering any damage."

"Oh. Well, that's certainly convenient."

Sairex nodded and strode calmly through his castle to a large set of double doors. He placed his palm on the center and murmured a few words. Distantly, Miroku heard a groaning rasp of stone on stone as some internal locking mechanism slid open. His eyes widened as he took in the sight of the room.

Shelves lined both walls floor to ceiling and were stocked with too many different things to name. Bottles, jars, boxes, and vials were stuffed amidst sacks and baskets, all containing powders or liquids, leaves or...things.

"Wow...Sairex, what is all this?"

"My alchemy zupplies. I can't very vell carry EVERYTING vith me. Bezides dat, zome of it doesn't keep very vell when moved too much." As he spoke, Sairex had moved through the room and was shuffling through a stack of thick leatherbound books. "Ah, here ve go. I need to do zome research vhen ve get back to da castle."

Eskrai chirped.

"Er...vell, I'm zorry, Ez, you have to get used to it. I zwore my zervices to da House of da Inu no Taizho. I have to live dere. But I promise to come to visit more often, alright?"

The raven made an expression that Miroku could have sworn was a scowl before nodding. "Do not worry, my dear Lady Eskrai, I will watch over him for you."

"Vell, ve're off. It'll be a bit of a run and I vant to get back to da Vest as zoon as ve can. I have a feeling zometing isn't quite right."

Soon Sairex was back outside and dashing across the open terrain. Miroku was flying overhead, enjoying the freedom of flight. He had no idea where he was going, however, so he was careful not to fly too high or lose sight of Sairex. The raven-demon in question had a surprising amount of stamina and soon Miroku was settled in the crook of his arm, cradled against his chest as his lover continued his run.

"This would probably have gone faster for you if you had your wings still, huh?"

"Mm...yes, but I do not mind. I feel better having you zafe den I vould getting vhere I vas going a little faster."

"Where ARE we going?"

"Just a bit further...up in dese mountains is a cave vith an underground pool dat I have zpecially prepared and tended. It vill magnify my zearch and make tings easier."

"Oh."

Sairex looked fairly tired by the time they arrived, but he waved away Miroku's concern and headed into a carefully concealed cave. The cave was small and rounded, completely unimpressive. At the far end was a deeply carved and perfectly smooth basin. Tiny runes that glowed shades of blue and purple were etched around the outer rim.

Sairex set fire to a pair of oil-bowls that flanked the pool, providing a sudden burst of light, then kneeled before the water. "Vatch, but do not distract me..." As he spoke, Sairex dropped the crystal he had brought into the water. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply, calming himself. Slowly his eyes reopened and he reached forward, murmuring softly. He gently tapped the surface of the water with one talon.

Ripples expanded outward in a ring, and as the surface returned to it's placid state, Miroku saw images forming clearly. Soon he was looking into the bedchamber of a sorceress, actually at Karalichala herself. The raven demoness was sitting at a desk and poring over a thick tome.

Sairex eyed her for a long moment, his expression hard and dark. "Hn...zo dis is da one dat vas zo bold and foolish..."

Miroku shifted uneasily, suddenly having the distinct impression that Sairex was about to do something he shouldn't. "Whatever you're thinking..."

"Hn. I changed my mind. I VANT her to know I am looking at her, and I am not happy." Sairex's eyes gleamed, glowing a bright yellow as he reached into the pool and plucked out the blue crystal. "Look at me..."

Karalichala's spine stiffened abruptly and she snatched a dagger from her sleeve - a familiar dagger to Miroku, who was almost ill at the sight of it. She looked around worriedly, before looking up.

The moment her eyes focused in Sairex's direction, her body jerked backwards harshly, slamming into the wall as blood began to trickle from every opening in her head. The crystal in Sairex's palm shattered, and the raven smiled in grim satisfaction.

"Alright...ve can go home now. Although it vill be a bit zlower going...I am tired."

"What did...what did you do to her? Not that she didn't deserve it and much more."

"A...varning zhot, if you vill. I ztruck her mind vith my own. Zhe IS powerful...but I am more. And I know vhere zhe is now. Jormandar is helping her. I zhould have realized." Sairex paused for a moment, then turned to look at Miroku. "I...have a very zerious question for you."

"Of course, anything..."

"If I do not kill her before da child is born...I do not tink I can bring myzelf to destroy it, no matter the potential risks. How...vill you feel about me raising it?"

"I can only hope you will allow me to adopt it and claim it as my own kin, even if they are not of my flesh or blood."

Sairex smiled and nodded. "Of course. Dat's zettled den. Come, let us go home. Dey couldn't have gotten into TOO much trouble vithout us, right? It vas only one day..."


	60. Chapter 59

Pride (In the Name of Love) 59 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - A warning to my hardcore yaoi fans - There is a definite not-yaoi citrusy bit here...I suppose it could be skipped over without damaging the plot if you are so terribly against such things. Lol!

It is getting difficult to update this as often as I would like. There may be days for a while where I cannot manage one. To make the long story short, I generally update in the morning after I get off work..however, my mother has taken to screaming bloody murder at me to do more work the moment I get home...clean my barn! get me a yard sale together for the weekend! clean out the garage! clean the house! ((It isn't that I mind doing my fair share of housework, but her reasoning is...and these are actually her words... "It doesn't matter that I'm not working. I deserve to sit around and do nothing. I worked for years and raised you kids, you owe me. So give me my damn rent money, gas money, pay for my car payment, and do whatever the fuck I say or you can move out."))...then she screams at my brother when he gets home so I don't get enough sleep...and my mornings after work I am thus wholly exhausted and such. So, do not fear, dear reader...I will update as often as I can, but until this recent bout of insanity subsides a bit, I may not manage it daily. It will pass. *sigh* Can't wait to move out next year! XD

And just for giggles... Imagine, Toga with PMS...oh, the West would suffer....

In response to Fluffy's Green Comb....XD yes. ..I too thought of the song "My own Grandpa"...as well as the horribly twisted, mind-numbing thought pattern that you perfectly detailed in your review...however, fun though the thought is, I really don't think I should have Sesshy fathering his father's puppies.

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Jormandar blinked when the blood-streaked raven demoness flew into his room, her long, taloned fingers wrapping around his throat. Her voice was a frantic hiss. "He found me! Already, he found me, damn you!"

Jormandar narrowed his pupilless black eyes, his voice dry and slithery like a snake on gravel. "And just what do you expect me to do about it, Lady Karalichala? Wage open war against him? I am no fool. You were the one that chose to reveal yourself."

"I did not expect him to find me zo quickly, damn it..." she hissed irately, wiping angrily at the blood that still trickled from her ears. "He ztruck me hard..."

"And you yet live. All know that the Kinslayer's strength was in the clairvoyant arts. Scrying, cyphering, prophecy. As he obviously was not HERE to strike you, he struck you from afar, thus likely through scrying. The fact that you survived, unprepared, means he simply does not yet possess the strength to bear against you. You have time yet. He is still recovering."

Kara paused and then hissed her annoyance. She hated that the emaciated, spindly creature before her was right. She would have loved to tear out his throat, but no...she yet had use for the puppetmaster. She nodded slowly. "Den I ztill have zome time...though how much, I know not. You vill assist me in my assault."'

"Will I..." Jormandar glared, not liking being told what it was, exactly, he was going to do.

"It vill further your own designs as vell as mine. My immunity vill be written into da terms of zurrender. In return, I loan you my dracolich and my army of zlaves."

"YOUR dracolich, Lady?"

"I revived him. Zetsukosei vill obey you, but he obeys me first. Bezides...I have been vorking on another for you. But dis one is much more cunning. Zetsukosei had his moments...but dis one zurvived on his guile."

"Oh?" Jormandar was interested. "And of what possible use is this new creature? Demon, I am assuming..."

"Only in part. Come."

"In part? What the hells do you mean?"

"Kaa...hush and come." Kara glared. "Dis one is my gift in return for your assistance in da upcoming movement."

Jormandar sighed inwardly and followed the raven demoness down to the lower dungeons that she had commissioned into a laboratory of sorts. His eyes had no problem adjusting to the darkness - he needed no light to see.

The puppetmaster scowled as he tried to make sense of the fleshy mass in front of him. A human torso was strapped on a table, the bits carefully sewn together. His eyes took in the black thread holding the mess together and blinked when he saw it moving.

"Flesh-vorms. Dey vill become part of him as his body heals. Homunculi."

"Homunculi? You expect me to think a random homunculus or any number of them will make a servant worthy of giving my enemies pause?"

"Dis one vill. He vill be altered from his previous ztate, much ztronger dan in life. Dis one vill zerve you very vell."

"What do you call this creature, then, Lady?" Jormandar was intrigued by the wickedly confident look in the raven demoness' eyes.

Karalichala smiled and threaded her fingers through the long, silky black locks of the partially reconstructed corpse. "Naraku."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Are you SURE you are alright?" Miroku shifted from foot to foot in agitation. Sairex was trudging along. His expression was neutral enough, but he seemed exhausted.

"I am fine. Merely tired. I am...not zo recovered as I believed."

"You didn't intend for that to be a mere warning shot, did you?..." Miroku asked in sudden understanding. Sairex turned weary yellow eyes to him before smiling slightly.

"No. I didn't."

"You should rest, then."

"It is not zafe here. Better to keep moving and get back home den to rest. Dis is da territory of Kattaras. I do not know vhether or not he vill confront me, but resting is no option. I am da only one dat dares travel openly vithin da territory of another. Kattaras is...mm. Zometing of an ally, I zuppose. A more decent zort dan most of da circle...but ztill, not friendly."

"I can be very friendly. Do you usually hold council with birds, Lord?"

Sairex's spine stiffened and he turned. Miroku eyed the creature before them. He was huge, easily eight feet tall, and extraordinarily well muscled. Bony, razor-sharp blades jutted from many places in his body. His dark blue skin was painted with vivid white stripes and designs. Thick black hair was pulled into a tall topknot, and glowing red eyes were staring at them both. He looked as if he could crush Sairex with one finger.

"I do, actually. Zimply because others can not underztand my kindred does not mean I cannot."

Kattaras snorted. "Hn...all such creatures are good for is a light snack." He grinned ferally at Miroku, bearing dozens of wickedly sharp teeth.

"I vould be most put out if you ate one of my pets, Kattaras," Sairex said smoothly. Miroku decided it was likely in his best interest for this new demon to believe he was simply a raven. "Vhy do you bother me? I am only passing through."

"Where are your wings, Lord? I have never seen you without them."

Sairex narrowed his eyes. "Dat is none of your concern. Zpeak or leave me, I have no patience for you and no quarrel vith you."

"I need information."

"My price is zteep," Sairex returned smoothly. "One question. In return, I vant tree of your dusk-blooming chokevines."

"I have one vine and seeds. The rest have been destroyed in recent conflict."

"Dat is not enough and da zeeds take hundreds of years to fully grow."

"Take it or leave it. No one else can provide you with even one."

Sairex scowled darkly. "Ask."

"The northern lord gathers an army and raises more corpses to walk beside him, steals all the living he can from any land bordering his own. I hear he even has stolen and enslaved the minds of many from Outside. What is his game? Should I be preparing my defenses? I have no quarrel with Jormandar that I am aware of, but I stand the biggest threat to his rule short of you."

Sairex frowned before shaking his head slowly. "Jormandar is becoming more and more of a problem dese days."

"I do not understand why you do not simply take him and Quiva out of the picture. Shass and I would ally with you. You could be the Overlord of the Circle with ease. There has not been one since Tsetsukosei killed Magnallak."

Sairex chuckled, and Miroku did his best not to stare at his lover. Was he REALLY so fearsome as to invoke this kind of grudging respect and belief in his abilities? "My dear Kattaras, I have no doubt I could take da Circle. But to do so vould change da balance of my life. For zome, my death vould be vorth more dan my life."

"Hn..As they say, too valuable to kill and too dangerous to let live. Very well. You still have not answered my question."

Sairex whistled sharply, and a small dark form shot out of the clouds. It moved to hover in front of them. It had the form of a bird, roughly, but looked to be more a shadow than anything. Sairex spoke softly to it in a language Miroku did not understand. The shadow-raven screeched - a strange, tinny, hollow sound...then vanished. "My emissary vill come to you zhortly vith your answer, and to pick up my payment. For now, I leave."

"Very good. I can transport you if you wish."

Sairex paused for a long moment, seeming to consider this. "Very well. I go to da mountain pool dat leads Outside."

Kattaras nodded and saluted stiffly. "Of course. I am glad you are not here on unfriendly terms, Lord."

After Sairex nodded, Miroku saw the world suddenly blur around him. When things came to rest again, they were standing in front of a small mountain spring.

"Well, that saved us a trip I guess..." Miroku said after a moment, still feeling horribly dizzy.

"Indeed..." Sairex frowned. "But I AM out of touch...I don't know vhat Jormandar is planning. If it's political games vithin da Circle, I do not care...but vhat if it is not? I really vill have to look into dis. Come, ve vill be home zhortly."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shock hit Sesshoumaru almost as hard as the thunderbolt of lust that shot through him. Somewhere inside the back of his mind, the beast that was his demon was crowing in feral triumph. After all, it wasn't often one received the submission of what was one of the most powerful demons alive, no matter the body they were in. A pleased little growl rumbled through him as he leaned forward and nibbled none-too-gently at Toga's throat, his fingers abruptly moving of their own accord to start tugging at various ties and clothing. If it resisted, there was a good chance it was going to be destroyed.

Toga came to the rescue of Sesshoumaru's wardrobe and helped toss the offending fabric to the side without it being destroyed. Sesshoumaru did pause in his teasing to prop himself up on his arms more and rake his eyes down her body appraisingly.

"Even like this, you are still beautiful."

Toga snorted and then grinned teasingly. "Is that a compliment or not?"

"Indeed." Sesshoumaru paused, momentarily considering that this was likely the only pure-blooded female inu he would be having sexual relations with in his life. The thought amused him briefly before he drowned his smirk in a hungry kiss. Toga gave in to the kiss willingly, a soft moan sliding from her and increasing in volume as she felt Sesshoumaru's nimble fingers tracing along the curve of her breast.

It distantly occurred to Toga that this would be an interesting experience...she had always enjoyed the reactions she had been able to cause in her female lovers but had never given it much thought on how different it would feel to be on the receiving end. Different, but definitely delicious. Her eyes popped back open and her back arched as she was torn from her thoughts by Sesshoumaru's fingers sliding between her legs. Apparently, the younger taiyoukai was as curious to explore her body as she was to be explored.

Sesshoumaru smirked in smug satisfaction as he broke the kiss, sliding down to idly flick his tongue over one nipple, then the other. His questing fingers had found the happy bundle of nerves that made Toga squirm and writhe beneath him desperately, and he was taking full advantage of it. It gave him a heady sense of power, even if his logic distantly reminded him Toga could liably still trounce him.

Toga might have disagreed at the moment, if she had been able to think at all. Fireworks were exploding behind her eyes as unfamiliar but wholly wonderful sensation flowed like molten lightning through her veins. There was something to be said for giving yourself over to a lover and letting them have their way with you...

A new groan was yanked from her as Sesshoumaru shifted, sliding down her body abruptly and wasting little time in plunging his tongue into her. She gasped in helpless delight, her fingers tangling in Sesshoumaru's hair. The younger taiyoukai watched her reaction through his eyelashes, memorizing the way she thrashed every time his tongue slid along her or deeper into her.

When Sesshoumaru grinned deviously and slid up to suck and lick at her clit, Toga exploded with a scream that surprised her probably more than anyone, her back arching with enough force that she thought she might break. Sesshoumaru's hands gripped her hips tightly and held her more or less in place, not bothering to slow or stop in his ministrations. Toga was simply delirious with pleasure by this point, panting and dimly aware that she was pleading for more.

Sesshoumaru decided he had toyed with this delectable creature long enough, his own lust trying to claw its way free of him. He quickly shifted so he was laying over her and claimed her mouth in a bruising kiss as he ground against her, pleased with the way her legs automatically curled around him in an effort to pull him closer. Sesshoumaru was more than happy to grant her unspoken request, snapping his hips forward and burying himself in her body with one smooth thrust.

Neither of them expected him to meet resistance and Toga let out a shallow gasp, wincing slightly. Sesshoumaru froze and blinked, the fog of lust in his mind clearing enough to fathom what happened. "Mm...apparently...you are a virgin female..."

"Was..." Toga grinned slightly, the slight discomfort rapidly receding. "Nn...you aren't going to break me..."

Sesshoumaru smirked and claimed her lips in another hungry kiss as he began to move. Oh, he might not break her...but that didn't mean he wasn't going to attempt to drive her insane with ecstasy.


	61. Chapter 60

Pride (In the Name of Love) 60 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I know I mentioned I hate my life? I hate my job too. I ultimately get to work a day and a half for free cause I had to pay for mistakes that weren't really my fault, but it was pay up or get fired. Grrr... *sigh* Lol... I keep on like this and no one will ever read my author notes.

This beast is now on page 264. Kinda impressed with myself about that.

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Sairex stared glumly at the destruction in his and Miroku's room. He idly prodded a couple of ruined vials. All of his supplies - and far worse, his notes and books - that he had brought with him were destroyed by the fire and the collapsing wall. Some of the things he had were truly irreplaceable, or at least close to it. Inuyasha continued listing off the day's report.

"...and I guess when the kit went nuts he killed seven wolves and almost killed fourteen more, but between the healer and Sesshoumaru's Tenseiga, they're pretty much better. Oh...and...my fa...er...I don't know what to call him. Her... Uh... Anyway..."

Sairex looked morosely at Inuyasha. "Zpit it out, m'lord..."

"My father is now a female. Don't know how it happened, just woke up that way. Does that make him my mother? Sorta?" Inuyasha scratched at an ear, not really wanting to think about it.

"Perfect." Sairex sighed and flopped back against a wall. Miroku rubbed his back soothingly. "Da gender-zvitching potion vas an accident I found vhen ve vere trying to fix me. Ve zaved zome, but it vas ruined vith everyting else. And vithout my notes and zome of da tings I had here, it vill take me a very long time to be able to make a counter-potion, if I can at all."

"You mean she might be stuck that way?" Inuyasha blinked and then frowned. "Fuck. I can't imagine that'll make him very happy. Her. Gah...."

"I'll vork on it. Zee vhat I can come up vith. As for da kitzune...I don't know vhat to do about dat. Vithout da recipe he used or any idea how much of vhat he used, any antidote I make could kill him. But I'll vork on dat too. And you...double da guard or zometing...Jormandar is up to no good and it is a poor time to take chances. I vill go zpeak to your father."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga let out a sleepy little half-growl at the knock on the door. Sesshoumaru balefully opened one eye and then shut it. Both of them were exhausted and more than content snuggling up - answering the door was very low on their list of priorities or desires. It didn't even rank, truth be told.

"Toga, open da door or give me permission to come in. It is important. I von't be long."

Toga murmured incoherently and tried to pull the blanket over her head. Sesshoumaru sighed heavily. "The door is not locked."

Sairex peeked in the room a moment later and did his level best to keep his expression neutral. Toga's sleepy golden eyes peered at him from beneath a curtain of disheveled silvery bangs. "Nn...what?"

"I am zorry to bother you."

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily. "Hn. The damn guests are probably all here by now. I will need to attend to them anyway." Despite his words, he didn't bother to move in the slightest to accomplish that goal.

"Da reason you're a voman has to do vith a potion I accidently made vhen trying to cure my blindness. I had plenty extra and vould have just given you zome to zvitch you back, but it vas destroyed vith da rest of my room. How is it you came to ingest it anyvay?"

Toga shrugged slightly. "I don't know...the only thing I consumed that no one else did was some tea....but how would this potion of yours have made it into my drink?"

"I am not zure. Zomeone must have ztolen zome."

"Then there is a chance they may have more. I would start by asking the kitsune...should he be at all coherent. Or I shall ask Rin when she awakens."

Sairex nodded and then sketched a quick bow. "I zhall leave you to...er...your business, den." The raven couldn't help but grin, flashing Toga a quick wink. "And you do make a very pretty voman, Toga."

Toga snorted and threw a pillow in Sairex's direction. "Eh, get out of here..." She was very aware that she was blushing. Sesshoumaru was simply smirking in amusement and seemed entirely uninclined to help her out. "And just what are YOU looking so smug about?"

"Nothing. Merely thinking that perhaps accepting the raven there as an advisor was a good choice. He seems to have good taste."

Sairex snickered and ducked out of the room, leaving Sesshoumaru to fend off Toga's mock rage.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The room swam slowly into focus. One dull ruby eye slowly struggled to make sense of the imagery. What was going on? Some sort of new trickery? A new devious effort to torment him? They had all failed so far. No punishment yet had served to torture his black heart.

Karalichala whirled as she felt the sudden spike in Naraku's consciousness. Her pale yellow eyes narrowed. How was it that this creature could be at all conscious? He was missing most of his vital organs...hell, most of his body...as yet. And yet...his crimson eye - she only had restored one as yet - was open and focusing on her. "My...give you a heart and you vake right up. Impressive."

"Who...are you?" Naraku rasped. The action hurt his throat and his barely repaired vocal cords. His voice was a breathless wheeze and scarcely audible.

"I am da one putting you back together. You vill zerve us...and vhen you have done as ve ask, you vill be released to do as you please."

Naraku's eye narrowed dangerously. He served NO ONE. However...now, when he had nothing to work with was not the best time to argue. "What would you have me do?"

"My....companion...desires vengeance against Zezzhoumaru. I do not know vhat role he vould have you play in dat."

Naraku paused. Revenge against Sesshoumaru? THAT was the task he would be charged with to earn his freedom? Suddenly, this didn't sound half bad.

"Vhat do you know about Zezzhoumaru, Inuyazha, and da Inu no Taizho?"

"I can understand you wanting to know what I do of the first two, but their father is long dead and rotting. I have seen his bones myself."

"Tings change. He vas brought back to life and is to reclaim his throne, zo I hear. Both his pups live vith him in da Vestern castle, along vith a ... very dangerous demon of my own clan."

"So shall I destroy this demon of your clan then?"

Karalichala whirled and glared at Naraku. "No! He must not be killed...he is too valuable. He knows...too many tings..."

"Very well. This process of your...restoration of my body...I can make it much faster and easier for you."

Karalichala narrowed her eyes. "Oh?"

"Bring me demons...and you shall see."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru sighed in agitation. Already, the less patient of his guests had begun to speculate that Toga's failure to appear was, indeed, due to Sesshoumaru making the whole thing up. Public opinion of the taiyoukai was at an all-time low. Even though none of the assembled demons were rude to his face, none of them made a secret of whispering behind his back.

Sesshoumaru felt his agitation increasing, as well as a very strong desire to NOT be here...to be anywhere but in this room with all these hateful creatures. So distracted was he, he barely noticed when the room quieted and the doors opened. A human walked in, flanked by wolves on either side. He bore with him a set of heavy scrolls and a small white flag of truce. An emissary. But from where?

The emissary strode up to Sesshoumaru and cleared his throat. His back straightened. "Are you the Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru did not answer save for the barest inclination of his head. It was rare that someone did not know him on sight.

"Hear you this, Lord Sesshoumaru, for these are the words of my liege and master, Jormandar of the Northern Circle."

Sesshoumaru growled and barely restrained the urge to pounce upon the emissary and rip him into very small, unidentifiable pieces. His cold glare told the emissary to deliver his message...and to be quick about it.

"My liege calls for your personal surrender. The terms are not negotiable. You will have a fortnight to either accept or decline the terms as they are offered. My liege offers a treaty of peace and a permanent non-aggression pact for the Western Lands in return for you turning yourself over to him and submitting to his will. His quarrel with you is private, and he offers to keep it thus."

"And if I should decline?"

"Should you refuse the terms of this offer, my liege has mobilized his army and will declare war on these lands. All that lives under the banner of the Western Kingdoms will perish, be they human, demon, or animal. All that grows will be burned, and the entire land will be rendered barren and empty."

Sesshoumaru stared at the emissary, acutely aware of the growing whispers from the assembled crowd. This bastard wanted him bad enough to start such a war? Not even a war to conquer the land, but to destroy it and make it wholly unlivable. Everything he had spent his whole life learning to care for and protect....everything his father had built. It was unthinkable to submit to such a demand...but what would be the consequences if he did not? If war did come to the West?

Whether or not the West defended itself and won the battles, they would all be viewed as unnecessary. For the price of one life, countless others would be spared the strife and turmoil. Rage and discontent would brew until the armies turned against themselves in a mad hunt for Sesshoumaru, to offer him up and stop the entire thing.

So caught up in the horrifying images painting themselves in his mind, Sesshoumaru almost did not notice his father's presence until he spoke. "Be gone from my House with your ridiculous demands, worm! I am the voice of my House and no decision involving a war or the prevention thereof will be made by any but me. Get you from this place before I remove you myself."

Sesshoumaru stared - his father was back to being male, it seemed, although the younger inu did not know how it had happened. Gasps and a cacophony of whispers shot through the crowd, most of them disbelieving that it could possibly be the one and only Inu no Taisho.

Jormandar's emissary nodded serenely. "Another messenger will be here in a fortnight to discuss the matter further and accept the surrender of Sesshoumaru."

Toga growled dangerously, his claws flexing. In a move faster than half the assemblage could follow, his blade lashed out, cleanly beheading the messenger. His blazing sunfire eyes took in the rest of the room and the quiet, wide-eyed stares. "Should anyone else have an issue with my House, my pup, or my return, I suggest you speak up now."

Never had a silence been so deafening. Toga resheathed his blade with a satisfying click. "You may resume the ball. Enjoy my hospitality." He settled into his throne as the party resumed, wholly aware of the countless stares but not bothering to react to them. He was far more concerned with Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru sat near him, staring at the floor. His pup was filled with a tense, nervous energy that Toga did not like at all. He looked ready to jump out of his skin if something jarred him the wrong way. // Oh, damn that wretched Jormandar...what lengths will I have to go to to prevent my Sesshoumaru from either sacrificing himself to this fiend for the sake of the kingdom...or taking matters into his own hands? // "Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru flinched and then looked up at him slowly. "I do not think I have much choice in this. The West can not be sacrificed simply f--"

Toga's growl was fierce and angry as his hand shot out, catching Sesshoumaru's chin and forcing the younger inu to meet his gaze. "You are MINE and I will NOT give you up to some twisted fiend for any threat. Let his armies come and taste of my wrath, but he will not have you. I will gladly die again before I see that happen."

"But the kingdom..."

"My love for you is far greater than my love for a collection of dirt, grass, trees and rocks. This can be rebuilt. You can not be replaced. So hush, my Sesshoumaru, and put your thoughts of self-sacrifice from your mind. I could never live knowing you had given yourself to some monster for the sake of my lands."


	62. Chapter 61

Pride (In the Name of Love) 61 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - If I had some great and wonderful note to put here, I'm sure I would. Nothing really, though...work's hell with it being Memorial weekend, and I'm more and more exhausted every day. That's about it.

The crux of the biscuit is the apostrophe.

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"So...this Sesshoumaru is curious. How is it you are back to your original form? Not that I am in any way complaining, despite the fact that you made a most...fetching female."

Toga rolled his eyes, inwardly pleased that his pup had calmed enough to make an attempt at humor. "It seems that Sairex went to examine the kitsune and then talk to young Lady Rin to see if he could learn anything. Rin informed him that the kitsune had a spare vial of the brew that switched me in the first place. So Sairex found it and brought it to me. While it was certainly an...enlightening...experience, I've no wish to remain female."

Sesshoumaru nodded, making a mental note to inform Inuyasha to take better care of his own ward. His gaze shifted to the gathering of various demon dignitaries. Almost all eyes were still riveted on his father in various stages of disbelief, but none of them were confident enough to step forward and voice any form of doubt or challenge.

He could not fail to notice, however, that those that were not staring at his father - who was reclined in his throne with a look of bored disdain - were looking at him. Several snatches of conversation drifted to his sharp ears, related to the ultimatum delivered by Jormandar's emissary. His eyes flicked to the spot where the body had been - the servants had been very quick to clean up the mess.

Sesshoumaru's attention was immediately diverted, however, when the Lady of the North approached his father, nodding her head respectfully. "It is a pleasure to have you returned to us...the Legendary Inu no Taisho, in the flesh once more."

"Indeed. I trust you have been well, Lady Shirizu?"

"Quite." The demoness nodded politely. "I have spoken with the other two...Lord Kanjiro and Lord Shimaku. They have agreed that we should hold council, now that you are returned....especially in light of the...events of earlier."

Toga's eyes narrowed and a growl rumbled low in his chest. "I will tend to my own affairs."

"We hardly think anyone would go through the trouble to take your lands and not come for parts or all of ours as well. Besides...you have always been a strict but fair ruler, and we have never had to fear you sporadically going off the handle in some crazed power-trip to expand your kingdom. Our borders are comfortably stable under the rule of your House." Here Shirizu nodded in Sesshoumaru's direction, indicating that he was included in her compliment. Sesshoumaru returned the nod politely - of the other three cardinal lords, Shirizu had always been the easiest to get along with and had remained a steadfast ally at best or neutral at worst in any conflict over the years.

Toga sighed inwardly - it was a logical fear and he knew that it would only be sensible to discuss it with his peers. "The meeting...would you be opposed to holding it here?"

Shirizu frowned slightly. "While I have no opinion in the matter, meetings are traditionally held on ground neutral to us all. Kanjiro would protest and Shimaku may side with him."

Toga flicked his eyes briefly to Sesshoumaru before sighing inwardly. He knew he was stuck. "Very well. When is this meeting and for how long?"

"Three days, and we would like to convene on the morrow."

Toga nodded stiffly. "As you will. I will be there."

"Thank you, Inu no Taisho." Shirizu bowed politely and took her leave. Toga's eyes slid over to Sesshoumaru, not entirely sure if he should say anything or not. Sesshoumaru slowly arched an eyebrow, reading his silence as loudly as any words.

"My Lord Father, I am quite capable of caring for myself for a mere three days."

"I know...I simply do not like leaving you here as much for my sake as your own. I have grown used to your company."

Sesshoumaru felt his cheeks flush slightly. "It is only three days. I can look after things in your stead, and there will be plenty of time to enjoy my companionship when you return."

Toga smiled and stood. "True enough." He turned towards the assembled guests and thanked them for coming and politely but firmly dismissed them. "If you will excuse me, I need to speak to your brother and his wolf general."

Sesshoumaru nodded and stood himself. "I believe I will...lay down for a while. Perhaps read a book. I am not feeling terribly well."

Toga nodded. "I shall come to you when I have finished my errands then." With that, the two parted ways.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha blinked when there was a sharp rap on his door. "Eh? Come in."

Toga slid into the room. "Inuyasha, I need to ask you a favor. It is of the utmost importance."

Inuyasha blinked then grinned. "Sure, whatever ya need. What's up?"

"Ah. I have an inescapable diplomatic council to attend over the course of the next three days. I need..." Toga frowned but continued. "I need you to swear to me that you will keep close watch over your brother. He would be offended that I ask this, so you need not make it obvious. Do not let him leave this castle under any circumstance."

"Er...you do know that Sessh could kick my ass if he really wanted to and wouldn't let me stop him from anything?"

Toga sighed heavily. "I am deeply worried. He is better than he was, but things have again happened and I worry he will either sacrifice himself to the enemy or...take matters into his own hands and end his life. I have not allowed him enough space of late for him to even consider acting on such impulses, but..."

"Relax, I'll take care of him. And if worse comes to worst, all I have to do is give him a good solid dose of Rin and he'll forget all about being suicidal."

Toga smiled slightly. "Thank you."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku groaned softly in his sleep and rolled over. Unbidden, a nightmare rose from the depths of his consciousness. It was an old, dusty nightmare, one he hadn't been visited by in half a decade, but still familiar. All around him, wind swirled viciously, drawn into the abyss in his palm.

Dear Buddha, but even the nightmare was making his hand itch and ache. Fuzzily Miroku opened his eyes, alarmed when the sensation didn't fade and instead seemed to intensify.

With a strangled gasp of horror, he watched as the center of his palm seemed to warp and ripple, a small black dot opening in the center and slowly widening.

"No!" he yelped, clenching his hand shut tightly and scrambling backward so hastily that he fell off the side of the bed. The vortex continue to grow, the familiar hungry ache burning through his arm.

Sairex peered over the side of the bed, blinking owlishly but looking alarmed at Miroku's panic. "Vhat is going on?"

"The...the wind tunnel...it...its back!" Miroku couldn't remember the last time he felt so ill, felt so much dread. It had been such a relief when the void had vanished, the curse ending with Naraku's demise. "Naraku..."

"Damn it..." Sairex scrambled to help Miroku contain the void. He hurled aside various items until he found Miroku's beads. He carefully but hurriedly scooped them up and brought them to Miroku, taking care not to touch them directly. "Good ting you didn't get rid of dese."

"I wouldn't, they're holy..." Miroku sighed as the angry void was contained, it's presence still there and weighing on the back of his mind like a momentarily dormant cancer. "How can this happen...Naraku has to be alive again, its the only way..."

"Den ve kill him again."

"If I last that long."

Sairex frowned and hooked his arms around Miroku, resting his head against the monk's chest. "Kaa, don't talk like dat."

"Why can't we all just have one day where nothing exciting, crazy, or terrible happens? A normal, boring day?"

"Mm...because it'd be boring?"

Miroku rolled his eyes. "Sounds like a nice vacation to me..." He sighed, staring at the all-too-familiar sight of beads wrapped around his wrist. "I suppose we should tell the others about this..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku was almost purring with contentment. Karalichala had delivered, far above and beyond his expectations. Hundreds of demons, ranging from minor imps to far more powerful creatures ripped from the depths of hell had been brought to him. He had absorbed them all, bit by bit, and discarded the unnecessary trash. With the ease of long practice, he painstakingly built himself a new body.

The only damper on his enthusiasm was the fact that Karalichala held his heart as he had once held Kagura's. She could crush the life from him easily, at any time.

However, Naraku found he was not terribly concerned. The raven demoness was a patient creature, he had learned, and not one to squander any source of power or any powerful ally. She was not prone to fits of petty rage, nor was she about to use him for any minor revenge. And despite her control over him, her respect for him was apparent as well. She had chosen to resurrect him not only for his knowledge of Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru, but because he was strong. Their relationship was more a twisted partnership than that of a master and servant. She held his heart more as a security measure than a threat.

Besides, it looked as though his tasks at the hands of her master were things he would have gladly done if left to his own devices anyhow. Revenge against Sesshoumaru? Nothing to complain about there.

Naraku had learned that her primary concern was avoiding the claws of another raven demon that had apparently taken up residence with Inuyasha and his family. She had been more than a little bent out of shape when she learned the the raven's human lover had been resurrected, although Naraku assured her Miroku's life would be useful.

Indeed, it amused the kumo terribly to think that the monk whose line he had long ago cursed still lived. It had been horribly draining for him to reinstate the curse from this distance...but he did not fear his weakness would result in his demise. Karalichala had worked far too hard to bring him back to let him be damaged now. He knew that reopening the void in the monk's hand would send a sure signal that he was alive again, as well. He had debated whether or not he wished to announce his presence, and in the end elected to do so. Let them worry and wonder. He would give them no further signs, not for a while. His body still needed perfecting, after all.

Plenty of time to play with them in the future.


	63. Chapter 62

Pride (In the Name of Love) 62 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Again, allow me to personally extend a thanks to those of you that review via mediaminer or AFF. I read each and every review and cherish them all, good or bad. I cannot respond as personally as I can the ffnet reviews, so...consider this my thanks to each and every one of you that have stuck with me, especially since the beginning. I look forward so much to reaping the fruits of my labor every time I check my email. You all help make it worth my while.

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"Alright, I think I'm ready. Do I look sneaky?" Inuyasha smirked and adjusted his ponytail, pausing to check his reflection out in the mirror. Kouga sighed and rolled his eyes.

"Inuyasha, are you actually serious? You're going to STALK your brother?"

Inuyasha looked offended. "My father told me to watch him and not let him know about it. So I decided the best way to do that is to keep my distance. Be subtle."

Kouga stared at Inuyasha. The hanyou was, indeed, many things. He was strong, and he was intelligent, even if it wasn't in a book-smart way. He was decisive and loyal to a fault.

He also possessed all the subtlety of a sack of rocks to the face.

"Alright, fine, I'll admit your brother's easy to look at ... for a dog... but are you really going to just sneak around after him for the next three days?"

The hanyou smirked and slid forward, trailing clawed fingertips over Kouga's collarbone, his voice a low purr. "Why, are you jealous? You would rather I stalk you instead?"

Kouga's cheeks flamed immediately. "Bah! Why...why would I want to be stalked by some dumb mutt? It's not like...not like I have any claim on you anyway!"

Inuyasha smirked, leaning in so close that Kouga could almost feel his lips move against his own when he spoke. "All you would have to do is ask, wolf..."

Before the startled, blushing wolf could respond further, Inuyasha was gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru tried his level best to ignore his brother all day. At first, he had assumed the hanyou's presence was simply coincidence. He put it to the back of his mind and continued about his business.

As the day progressed, however, it became obvious that Inuyasha was following him. It was also obvious that he was attempting to not be noticed. To his credit, Inuyasha was being fairly stealthy. Had the settings not been so intimately familiar to Sesshoumaru, he may indeed have not noticed him so much, perhaps overlooked him completely.

Eventually, however, curiosity turned to annoyance and Sesshoumaru used his powers, teleporting directly behind his brother. His voice was a familiar, commanding snap.

"Why do you follow this Sesshoumaru, brother? Were you put up to this?" The thought that their father may have set his brother to watch him irked the taiyoukai greatly, however justified his father's fears may have been.

"What? I don't know what you're talking about..."

"I hope you do not think I am a fool, Inuyasha. Do not make that mistake."

Inuyasha thought quickly, his eyes darting about for anything to help him. He blurted out the first thing that came to mind. "I had a problem and I ... I wanted to talk to you about it instead of going to someone else."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes suspiciously but inclined his head, an indication that Inuyasha should proceed.

"I...um... well, I think if I'm going to be a better...er... lord of sorts, I should learn to read and write so I don't have to look like an idiot. And I'd feel stupid asking the teachers like you have for Rin and Shippo...it's embarrassing. Would you teach me?"

"This Sesshoumaru is no teacher." Despite his automatic protest, Sesshoumaru was absurdly pleased by the request, even if he doubted its validity. "Hn...come."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru gestured to one of the many pieces of parchment scattered across his desk. He had been doing his level best to give Inuyasha an overview of what all he would be getting into. It quickly became apparent that the hanyou was bored half to tears. Sesshoumaru smirked inwardly - his earlier presumption had been right. Inuyasha wanted no part of this at all. In fact, judging by the way Inuyasha's ears drooped and his eyes stared blankly at the paper in front of him, he began to doubt the hanyou was paying him any attention at all.

"And this is the final symbol you use to write your name. I will eventually teach you how to sign your full title in proper script."

Inuyasha nodded, bored. His ears did not so much as twitch.

"And this is the sign for our House...." Sesshoumaru went on to detail the seal to his brother before shifting to the next paper.

"This is the document that explains how I intend to take your wolf prince as my mate in a complex ritual involving three dead chickens, a snake skin, fourteen green pebbles and a frilly pink dress. With bows. I believe it will be quite fetching, bring out his eyes."

Inuyasha nodded distantly as he had for the last several explanations Sesshoumaru had given. He suddenly jolted in a way that Sesshoumaru felt was quite comical. "Wait, what?"

"Inuyasha, I am no fool. If you truly wish to learn literacy, I will show you, or I will have one of the castle tutors show you. I am no teacher. But I will not allow you to follow me about and waste my time. My Lord Father put you up to this, didn't he?"

Inuyasha shook his head rapidly. Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed dangerously and the hanyou finally relented, his ears flattening back against his skull. "Alright, fine! Yeah, the old man was worried about you so he set me to look out for you. He's worried that something might happen to you or..."

"Or that I'll do something to harm myself."

"Well, shit, Sessh, I'm sorry but you don't have a perfect record of late. I'm not blaming you for anything, a lot of nasty, fucked up shit happened to you. Anyone would have trouble dealing with all of it, especially with all the extra stuff you put up with being in your position."

"This Sesshoumaru does not need a keeper, Inuyasha! What I do with my life is my own concern and my own affair."

"Fuck that. That right there is exactly why the old-" Inuyasha cut off at the low, warning growl from his brother. "..why our father wanted me to look after you. What you do is OUR business too because we care about you. I don't know exactly how serious or deep your relationship is with him and I'm not gonna ask....but he'd be devastated if you managed to pull off some stupid shit and get yourself captured or killed. It's REALLY obvious to everyone that you are the ...like...fucking center of his world. And I don't hold that against you. I'm not jealous. For who knows how long, you were all each other had. He raised you and you followed him like the sun rose and set on him. You still do. And there's nothin' wrong with that. But the point is...you have people that love you and would be hurt if you were gone. Father, Rin...me..."

Sesshoumaru was silent, giving his brother a look that really wanted to be a glare but wasn't quite making it. He couldn't bring himself to look appropriately haughty.

"Besides...I want to spend some more time with you. I haven't had the chance lately, what with all the chaos going on around here."

Sesshoumaru snorted. "Hn...if I find this is some sort of twisted play, I will come over this desk and..."

Inuyasha arched an eyebrow. "Oh? What will you do, exactly?"

"I have not decided, but it will be assuredly unpleasant."

"Mm, sounds kinda hot. Come get me."

Sesshoumaru squinted. "I am threatening you, not attempting to seduce you."

"Eh, it starts with being pounced on. Sounds seductive enough for me."

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes and leaned back in his chair. "Well, I'm not about to make any such attempts now."

Inuyasha smirked and stood. "Well, then I suppose I will just have to come to you." So saying, the hanyou planted a palm on Sesshoumaru's desk and vaulted lightly over it. The taiyoukai blinked but was half trapped in his chair, since Inuyasha was suddenly directly in front of him. "No reason we can't enjoy ourselves...but I think I'll skip the ritual with dead chickens and pebbles."

Sesshoumaru stared at Inuyasha for a long moment before speaking gravely. "Well, that is not a ritual to perform lightly."

Inuyasha blinked. "You were just...making stuff up."

The taiyoukai looked indignant, and then incredulous. "Making stuff up? Hn. Has no one taught you about proper demon mating ceremonies? Not even your wolf? He didn't even tell you about the chicken ritual?"

Inuyasha's eyes widened and his ears drooped downward. "...No..."

"Oh...it's quite serious. Although I DID add the part about the frilly pink dress."

"What....what the hell does this ritual signify and...how do you do it?" Inuyasha asked somewhat doubtfully, leaning back to sit on the edge of the desk.

"It begins with arranging the green pebbles in the appropriate place along a diagram in the floor..." Sesshoumaru kept a level tone and blank expression as he began detailing the process of performing this ritual. Inuyasha's expression was somewhat doubtful, but he was still hanging on every word. After Sesshoumaru had sketched a design on paper and explained what to do with the stones, Inuyasha had a thought.

"Then what the fuck are the chickens for?"

"Eating, of course. Rituals are hungry work."

"You're fucking with me..." the hanyou finally accused, even though it was obvious by now that he no longer thought that was the case.

Sesshoumaru dropped his blank look and smirked somewhat mischievously. "And if I am?"

"You asshole! You had me starting to believe this crazy shit!"

"Oh, REALLY, Inuyasha, what demon would go through all that tripe?"

Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he growled before springing forward. Sesshoumaru had nowhere and no way to dodge, sitting in his chair as he was, and Inuyasha took him - and the chair - down in a tangled heap. Sesshoumaru squirmed and tried to extricate himself from the mess, trying to glare at Inuyasha but almost laughing instead. "Get off me!"

Inuyasha promptly sat on his chest. "And if I don't?"

"Then I'll throw you off."

"Because you have such good leverage sitting in a chair on its back..."

"Hn...you think this Sesshoumaru can not make you move?"

"Kinda wish you wouldn't, you're fairly comfortable." Inuyasha smirked and patted Sesshoumaru on the thigh, leaning back contently.

"Unhand me, hanyou!" Sesshoumaru growled, trying to lift himself and finding, much to his chagrin, that Inuyasha was right about his lack of leverage. With the bottom of the chair forcing his legs up, it left him in an incredibly awkward position.

"You like my hands on you."

"If you want to keep your hands on YOU and not have them removed at the wrist, I suggest you take them back and get the hell off me!"

Inuyasha chuckled, snagging Sesshoumaru's wrists before he got clawed. Sesshoumaru was starting to glare now, and Inuyasha sighed before reluctantly getting off him. "Fine, fine..."

The taiyoukai slithered free of his chair and sat up, attempting to look dignified as he brushed himself off. "Hn, not everyone is some....some overly-hormonal beast that can't control themsel--mmph!" Sesshoumaru was cut off as he was again pounced at, his eyes flying wide as Inuyasha silenced his griping with a kiss.


	64. Chapter 63

Pride (In the Name of Love) 63 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Memorial Day Weekend - OVER!!! Oh, thank you dear gods and powers that be... working alone at the only place open near the express way overnight...not so much fun. Lol...I'm so sore...so glad I have the next three days off after tonight. I may miss an update in there - going to spend some time having a WoW LAN party at a friends. Woo! (IF anyone plays and is curious, I play alliance on Perenolde - Aiune or Briannlei.)

Sorry it's short, it's the best my exhaustion will allow for. Need sleep.

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"I do not believe we have as much to worry about as you seem to think, Kanjiro," Shirizu said calmly. The four cardinal lords were seated at a square table and discussing the matter of Jormandar and his threat.

Toga was doing his level best not to fidget and twitch. He had no patience for this meeting right now - he was far too worried about what may or may not be going on back at his castle. He sighed inwardly and forced himself to focus, his eyes flicking between his three peers.

Shimaku, the Bandit King and Lord of the South, was a serpent youkai. He was intelligent and treacherous. His word was good, but one still had to be very careful when dealing with him. He was an expert at finding loopholes and cunning ways around binding oaths. He was dressed head to foot in thick black leathers. His hair was a deep shade of green. He wore it short and spiked, save for two long sections that hung, braided, on either side of his face. The tips of each strand were a goldish-yellow. His slitted hazel and green eyes shone with devious intelligence. At present, however, he was silent.

Shirizu, Lady of the North, was a beautiful creature. She was a bird youkai - though of what type, Toga had never been entirely sure. She was an elegant, graceful creature and had been in power almost as long as he himself had been. She was well loved by all her kingdom and had remained in power despite being so kind due to a fiercely devoted army and a population willing to lay down their lives to protect her. Dazzling sapphires complimented her silvery gown and her waist-length fall of blue-black hair. There had been a time Toga had even considered courting her, but Shirizu had made it clear to all that she was not interested in taking a mate, though the interest had flattered her.

Then there was the Eastern Lord, Kanjiro. He was a slender, willowy creature - a skilled fighter and fast on his feet. He wore his long, tawny hair in a tail. Sharp green eyes caught every detail and filed them away for future reference. At the moment, however, those eyes were trained on Toga. His tone was scathing, a biting hiss that almost would have sounded more appropriate coming from the snake youkai to his right. "No? You're wrong, Shirizu. We have plenty to worry about, and all because HE is too damn stubborn. One life for the life of his entire kingdom?"

Toga's voice was low and dangerous, trembling from the strain of forcing words through his growl. "The one life you speak of belongs to my SON, Kanjiro."

"You have another son. You would really let your whole land...and likely ours, as well...die to save one miserable wretch? He is broken anyways!"

Toga's growl was much more evident now, and his claws were digging deeply into the table. Shirizu frowned. "Kanjiro..."

"No! Too long I have let him and his son have their way and not said anything. You are a selfish bastard, Toga!"

Toga snarled and tried desperately to keep his composure, not wanting the neko to get to him. "I will not give up my son...either of them...for any reason. I would die to protect either of them from harm. I have, in fact. If it brings about a war, so be it."

"So that damnable Sesshoumaru is worth more than everything else combined? What, afraid you could not find another little fucktoy so loyal and obedient? Does he please you that damn much? Does he cream like his mother when you use him like the whore he is?!"

Shirizu and Shimaku caught Toga in mid-flight. Kanjiro's eyes widened in horrified shock at the horribly loud sound of Toga's teeth snapping together a hairsbreadth from his throat. The inuyoukai's eyes were blazing crimson, and it was all the other two could do to hold him off of Kanjiro. Toga's roar seemed to shake the very foundation of the building.

Kanjiro wanted nothing more than to flee but his body wouldn't move until Shirizu's voice snapped at him. "Get out of here, Kanjiro."

Toga had stopped attempting to rip free of his captors as some semblance of coherency bled back into him, but he was still trembling with the urge to rip the neko apart. His eyes were crimson death, fixated on Kanjiro. His lips were pulled back, baring his fangs in a feral snarl, and his fingers were flexing as if eager to gouge his claws into flesh.

Kanjiro made a hasty retreat from the room. Shirizu sighed and slowly released her grip on Toga, glad that he had such tremendous restraint. She knew as well as Shimaku did that the inuyoukai could have killed them both if he really had a mind to.

"I...am sorry for his behavior."

Toga's words were a clipped, vicious snarl. "If he speaks one word against me or mine again, I will kill him. I...must retire for now. If I do not calm myself, I may kill him anyways. Despite his accusations, I do not want a war....with the wretch Jormandar OR the eastern lands." So saying, Toga stalked stiffly out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shimaku slid into Kanjiro's room and eyed the neko youkai skeptically. His voice was slick and silky, although heavy with incredulity. "What in the name of all that is holy would you do that for, Kanjiro?"

The visibly shaken cat demon scowled at Shimaku. "Hn...what do you care, snake?"

"Next time you pull a stupid stunt like that, neko, I will not make an effort to save you. What in the blue bloody hell could you have been thinking? Everyone knows your hatred for Sesshoumaru, but have you no sense of self preservation?"

"This war will come, Shimaku."

"Be that as it may...to insult his son, and so outrageously?"

"It is true. I have sources...the twisted bastard is blinded by his sick lust for his own child and cannot see the good of his kingdom."

Shimaku rolled his eyes. "Alright, even supposing Toga is bedding his own son...do you not think that so vile an insult from you does not warrant his aggression? Inuyoukai have their faults, but disloyalty is far from one of them. He was well within his rights to kill you in defense of his honor."

Kanjiro bared his teeth in a snarl. "I have my reasons. And I am still alive, aren't I?...There are two sides to the coming war, Shimaku...the side he is on and the one I am. I am willing to have you with me. You should not make the mistake of siding against me."

"Openly opposing the Inu no Taisho is tantamount to suicide."

"Not when you have the proper allies, my serpentine friend."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shirizu followed Toga and sat next to him silently. She could see the tense rage playing through him still, in the way his muscles were taut and corded, the tick in his jaw, the visible pulse in his veins. Kanjiro did not know how close to death he had truly come.

"Toga...I am sorry. If I had known this meeting would come to this, I never would have agreed to it myself. Kanjiro is a loathsome wretch. His opinions are not ours."

"What if he's right?"

Shirizu blinked, rather taken aback. "Pardon?"

"What if I am being selfish? To defend one life over the lives of all in my kingdom...oh, do not mistake me. I do not regret it in any way, nor will I ever consider changing my stance. But is it such a selfish thing?"

"It is never selfish to defend that which you love. I am sorry that he made such accusations against you, though...I am sure they are u--"

"He's right."

Shirizu blinked. "But...what?...how can...I...I don't understand."

"I AM in an intimate relationship with my Sesshoumaru. I do not regret that, either, despite the opinions of others. I had, however, elected to keep it secret to spare him and myself the bother of the inevitable rumors and insults that will come of it. It troubles me that he found out. None outside of those closest to me know anything of it. What of you, Shirizu? Do you think less of me because of it?"

Shirizu was silent for a moment before responding. "Does he make you happy? Is he happy?"

"Yes to both, as far as I am aware."

"Then no, I do not think less of you for it. In fact, I am happy for you. Too long were you alone, Toga. You were alone for what seemed an eternity...had a brief relationship with his mother....and then were alone for so long caring for him. If you found a way to be happy, and to melt that boy's cold heart...more power to you."

"He isn't...you know. He's not so frigid as everyone assumes. Nor was..." Toga sighed heavily. "He was taken by an old enemy of mine, a dragon youkai, in defense of his ward. While in captivity, the beast forced him into many things. He was not a willing participant. All the rumors are wholly false."

"You need not explain this to me. I did not believe them any more than I believed the strange missive that came to me detailing his supposed sordid relationship."

"Thank you, Shiri. It means a lot to me to have you understand. You must know that in doing this...you will not endear yourself to Kanjiro. The gods only know what Shimaku will do."

"If it can bring you happiness, Toga, I will not only stay out of your way but openly stand by your side and put down those that oppose you. Now lay on your stomach, relax...let me get some of the tension out of your muscles. While I work, you can tell me how it is that you have come to live again."

Toga did as he was asked, a slight smile twitching his lips. It was good to have a friend.


	65. Chapter 64

Pride (In the Name of Love) 64 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Oh, sweet bliss...a day off...three of them, in fact...god, my legs hurt so bad. I woke up with a nasty cramp in my calf two days ago and it didn't abate, standing around and running about all night made it worse. All my life is screaming physical agony and...misguided optimism, mentally. I *AM* an optimist, which is one of my biggest failings in life. ((That is a long story. Suffice it to say if I was less optimistic and more realistic, life wouldn't suck so bad half the time. I set myself up for disappointment.)) I'm just really... sorta happy about something that I shouldn't be, because it's not REAL...I had a dream that subtly changed my view of someone and...meh. LOL...On with the story, that's what you're here for, right?

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Toga's eyes slid open as his door opened and then shut. He growled, still feeling quite cranky, and his growl only intensified when he smelled the scent of cat. Of all the creatures he least wanted to be awaken by, Kanjiro ranked very near the top of the list.

A moment later an oil lamp flickered to life in the nekoyoukai's hands. Toga held his growl only out of a sense of bewildered surprise. It took him a moment to figure out that the flame was trembling so much because Kanjiro himself was quivering.

The nekoyoukai set the lamp down. In his other arm he had a long, tightly wrapped bundle, which he set down too. Toga was sitting up now, staring with hard amber eyes at his unexpected midnight visitor. Kanjiro was visibly shaking, his eyes wide. The scent of fear...no, blatant, bone-deep terror...hung heavy about him.

"What in blazes brings you here? Especially after this evening?"

Kanjiro sank into a chair, his voice cracking when he finally spoke, although it was obvious he was making an effort to calm down. Still, his words had the quiver of a broken plea. "Toga...help me, please..."

Toga's eyebrows shot up. The NERVE of this demon...but...still..."Why would I EVER want to help you?"

Kanjiro slid to his knees, bowing his head. "Please...I beg you. Help me or kill me, but do not turn me out. I...I am sorry for earlier. You must understand...I...there has never been any love between you and I, and your son and I have always been something of adversaries...but you know I would not so brashly and openly strike at you. I may hate you but I respect you."

Toga scowled, but said nothing. He had no idea what was going on here, but he could not deny the truth of Kanjiro's words. It had in fact been troubling him that the nekoyoukai had insulted him so direly. A veiled insult or threat was a simple matter of course, and an outright insult occurred on occasion. But never, never on the level of the meeting of earlier. "Tell me what the hell is going on. I still do not know why I should even consider helping you, but you have piqued my curiosity. Speak before I change my mind."

"My family..." Kanjiro finally looked up. "The slimy bastard has my family."

"Who?"

"This damned Jormandar thing your son brought upon us!" Kanjiro hissed. "He came to me and wanted to use me and my army and my resources to strike at YOU. And I refused him because I didn't want a war, with you least of all. The casualties would be too great on both sides, and even if I despise both you and your sons, I'm not fool enough to deny your power. So when I refused to aid him, he took my mate and our daughters hostage...he told me what to say to you and told me to find a way to kill you before this meeting is done. With this." Kanjiro kicked angrily at the wrapped bundle he had brought with him. "It's some damnable wicked blade. It affects the mind, attempted to take me over. I was able to get it away from me before things went too far."

Toga frowned. No, he didn't like Kanjiro any more than the neko liked him, but he was honorable. The fact that the neko's innocent family had been drug into this mess because of his family - intentional or not - did not sit well with him. He glanced at the wrapped bundle before nudging at the heavy cloth.

"What are you doing?!" Kanjiro hissed, recoiling from the bundle as if it had attempted to bite him.

"I want to see it." Toga carefully unwrapped the thing, then burst out into a surprised laugh when he saw it unveiled in its entirety. "My Sounga!"

"Your....this is YOUR sword?"

Toga grinned somewhat ferally as he lifted the hellish blade. It lashed out at him, but quickly was subdued, recognizing his familiar dominance. "I have no idea how that tricky bastard got hold of this...but Kanjiro, I can tell you this much. If he sent you to try to kill me with this, particularly...he had to have known you would fail. On the off-chance you managed to kill me, you would have been possessed by the blade and had no real mind to call your own anyways."

Kanjiro moaned brokenly. "Then my family is probably already....oh, Toga, you bastard, why did you bring this on us?!"

Toga growled. "I did not! Nor will I allow you to blame my Sesshoumaru. You would have done the same damn thing in his position...lashed out at an enemy intending to harm you. And even still, would YOU trade YOUR child to this fiend, even to prevent a war?"

"No...Ah, damn it all, he will kill me when he finds out I revealed all this to you...."

"If I walk out of this building alive, and I fully intend to, your life is forfeit regardless the moment he realizes you are not dead."

"Then HELP me! I'll...damn it, I don't know! I need to know if there's any chance...if my family is alive. If they are...save them and you can have whatever you want. My whole damn kingdom, if thats what it takes. But please..."

Toga frowned as he thought. Getting to the eastern lands and into Kanjiro's castle would be a brutally impossible task, given the circumstances. An inuyoukai would CERTAINLY set off every alarm the neko had in place. Especially him. He needed someone fast but stealthy, unexpected... "I will help you, Kanjiro, if there is any help to be had. In return, I do not want your lands or your wealth or even your subservience. A treaty of peace and a proper alliance will be sufficient repayment. Excuse me, I must go borrow one of Shirizu's messengers."

"Thank you...and...I am sorry."

Toga nodded and headed swiftly out the door. He explained rapidly to a rather sleepy Shirizu that he needed to borrow her fastest messenger.

"But...Toga...who are you contacting? My swiftest birds have no substance and cannot carry a note, they are only meant for speaking between me and my people."

"My chief advisor. He is a raven youkai of...exceptional talent. If he cannot speak your bird's tongue, he can retrieve a message from its mind."

"Very well. Speak your message, then...." Shirizu held out her palm and a small bird with vibrant blue and purple feathers, shimmering and translucent, appeared. Toga relayed his message to the bird, and soon it was winging swiftly out the window and across the sky, vanishing from sight almost immediately.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hmm..." Sairex looked deep in thought. He also had a fiendishly curious look in his eyes that Miroku had already learned to be wary of.

"What are you thinking?"

"How much do you know about dis vind tunnel of yours?"

Miroku resisted the sudden urge to grip his wrist, though he wasn't sure if it would be to protect him from the raven or the raven from him. "I know all I need to. Why?"

"Vhat is on da other zide?"

Miroku gaped at Sairex and he DID grip his wrist then, fingering his protective beads. "I do not know. Oblivion, I suppose...and I am not about to let you find out."

Sairex pouted slightly. "I vould be careful..."

Miroku narrowed his eyes. "No. There is no damn way I am letting you look in my wind tunnel!"

Sairex pasted an innocent look on his face. "Look in? I vas rather tinking I'd take a little visit..."

"I am not letting you go in my wind tunnel! Are you CRAZY?!"

"Zome vould zay I am..."

"Look, Sairex, I know you are curious and I know you have a million and a half tricks, but...I can't let you do this. Do you think I could ever live with myself if you were wrong? If I sucked you in and you were lost in the void forever, obliterated and rendered into nothing but a memory?"

"If I can prove to you I have a zafe vay of examining it vould you let me? A vay vith no permanant risk at all? If I can figure out exactly vhat makes it vork, vhy it is as it is...perhaps zometing can be done about it."

"Well..." Miroku frowned deeply. He was mortified at the thought of Sairex gleefully leaping into the void, hating the thought more than he hated the tunnel itself...but if Sairex proved he had a truly safe way to examine it...maybe it would be different. MAYBE.

Miroku did not hold out much hope that anything short of the death - again- of Naraku would remove the void from his palm. He was resigned to it, and to the inevitably fatal end it would involve for him. It was a cancerous, devouring disease. He would die within a couple years, at best...ripped apart and consumed as the void tore free and swallowed him. As did his father and his father before him. But to risk Sairex? "Sairex, I can't let you....I can't lose you like that."

The raven frowned. "And vhat, exactly, makes you tink dat I vill be able to take it vhen da damn ting eats you?"

"On some level, Sairex, you are already resigned to my mortality. You already know that I will be in your life only for a short while. Wind tunnel or not. I would fall prey to age even if nothing unnatural occurred to shorten my lifespan. I am subject to human frailties. If I am with you all the rest of my life, it will only be but a blink in the span of yours."

Sairex winced at the calm way Miroku accepted his own impending doom. "Vell...I intend to do vhat I can to extend dat. You're too damn vise for your own good, I tink. No human zhould be quite so avare of deir own mortality...Anyvay, I have a problem vith da divine plan and vhatnot. I vill likely attempt to meddle."

"With what? My mortality?" Miroku arched an eyebrow.

Sairex didn't answer, staring somewhat moodily towards the window. He didn't LIKE thinking about how true what Miroku had said was. Oh, he had known from the start that theirs was, from his point of view, a relationship doomed to end in pain...but that didn't mean he was one to casually accept it.

Both of them were distracted by the sudden appearance of a tiny ghostlike bird. It landed on Sairex's hand and chirped to him. Sairex arched an eyebrow musingly.

"Well. You don't see that every day." Miroku cocked a half-grin. "Can you understand it?"

"Zomevhat. Birds have a...general language of zorts, but its not very zpecific. Zimple message, however...Toga needs me as fast as I can manage. I zuppose I'll be back vhen I can."

Miroku nodded, then slid forward and wrapped his arms around Sairex in a tight hug. "Don't be gone too long, alright? I'll miss you."

"Don't get into too much trouble vhile I'm gone. Vhen I come back I ztill intend to examine dat ting in your hand."

The monk sighed and leaned in to give his lover a brief but intimate kiss. "And I'll only let you if you can prove you will be safe. Hurry back."

Sairex smiled and waved before hopping out the window. Miroku hated when he did that - even though a split second later he saw a small, familiar black form flying off, his mind still wanted to make the connection of what usually happened with humanoids that leapt from high windows and inevitably hit the ground.

The monk sighed and then smiled slightly as he headed off down the hall. He truly was touched by his lover's determination to save him from death itself. // If only he was here to save me from Inuyasha when he finds out Naraku is back...I suppose I best tell him and get it over with. //


	66. Chapter 65

Pride (In the Name of Love) 65 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mmmm...day off. I wasn't going to update today - got a World of Warcraft LAN party to go to tonight...but I got up early so I decided..what the hell. Besides, I forgot just how bloody amazing the Inuyasha series was... I've owned it forever, read the manga again a couple weeks ago...but hadn't watched it in so long. I forgot exactly how epic it was and was squealing - at least internally - like a little girl as I watched my beautiful Sesshoumaru bouncing about and sounding all sexy. So, thus inspired...

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Cold, night-dark eyes watched the trembling neko lord sitting in Toga's room, staring at the flickering flame of the oil lamp. A smile curled the split lips and Jormandar's long, spindly fingers twitched. // So you thought to beseech him...I had not expected that of you, cat...but no matter. Even the Inu no Taisho is not THAT fast. //

Jormandar smiled at the dark glass of the viewing mirror, slowly spreading his fingers.

"Dance, puppet...dance..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kanjiro hit the floor face first as the words slithered within his skull. A tiny voice of protest died on his lips as his body twisted. He had been too late.

A terrible scream tore itself free of him as his body bowed against his will, his fingers hooking into claws. Emerald eyes widened in horror. The pain was shocking in its intensity. Bones began to snap as they were bent past their limits. Unbidden, in a last-ditch effort to defend himself, Kanjiro fell into his true form, a great, sleek cat.

Still, the wrenching continued. The doorway was thrown open as his yowl shook the room. Shimaku blinked, eyes widening in alarm. "Kanjiro? What in the hells...?!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jormandar paused briefly in his breaking of the cat, his tone musing. "Perhaps there is a better way for me to use you..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Shimaku slammed into the wall, the breath blasted from his lungs as long claws punctured his stomach, raking him open. He let out a terrible hiss, his body exploding into writhing coils and twisting around the horrible, crazed cat. Shimaku squeezed, his mind aching almost as much as the deep wounds. He knew he was in trouble. Vital things had been torn in the unexpected assault. But still, he did not want to kill the neko... he had been the closest friend the serpent youkai had ever had.

Despite the crushing force, Kanjiro fought wildly, entirely heedless of the pain and the danger. Again and again he tore at the coils binding him even as tears slid from his eyes.

This was not what he had wanted. Shimaku had been as a brother to him. Kanjiro was not evil. He was cunning and sometimes merciless. He had taken his fair share of lives, as had any demon lord of note - with the possible and rare exception like Lady Shirizu. But he was not a cold-blooded murderer. He did not delight in such things. // Oh please, kill me... do not let me cause this war...don't let me kill you... //

Shimaku squinted his eyes shut, sinking his fangs into the cat. // Forgive me, brother...//

Kanjiro felt the burn of venom seeping into his veins almost as acutely as he felt the flesh tearing beneath his claws. He was glad he was not in enough control of his body to see the damage he had caused.

Toga and Shirizu came around the corner at almost the same instant, stunned at the sight. Toga drew Sounga from his belt. "Kanjiro! What treachery is this?!"

Shimaku sighed inwardly as they approached, feeling somewhat relieved. The pain was distant now, and he felt his coils loosening as the floor rushed up to meet him. It was strange, this dark warmth... he never felt his head hit the stone as the feral cat broke free.

Shirizu gasped. "Shimaku! Lord Shimaku! Kanjiro, what have you DONE?!"

Kanjiro was wheezing, blood pouring from his jaws from internal wounds. His ribs were snapped and he could scarcely draw air into his damaged lungs. His eyes were red and lolling wildly. Distantly he knew that his body could not handle this. The venom was making his limbs heavy. Despite that, he turned his wild look to Toga, ignoring the sword leveled his way.

The neko crouched and sprang. Toga immediately moved to block, but the angle was wrong. The cat shot over his head. Sounga tore the beast open as he flew past, showering the inu in a crimson fall of blood. Kanjiro's aim had been accurate, however, and he landed on Shirizu claws-first.

"No!" Toga screamed and again launched himself at the crazed nekoyoukai. Kanjiro leapt again, this time dragging Shirizu along in his jaws. Toga's strike didn't miss - Kanjiro felt his leg almost severed as he landed behind Shimaku's still form. He ignored Toga, tearing desperately at the delicate bird-youkai's body.

Toga struck again, driving him off of Shirizu's body as Sounga lashed wildly. Kanjiro tried to bite, but the wounds had finally become too great. Sounga's devastating strikes, the venom, his crushed body...it was simply too much. He tried to fight Toga off, but only managed a few last glancing blows. As Jormandar released his control, Kanjiro stumbled and fell.

Toga did not hesitate to drive Sounga deeply into the cat's body, spearing him through the heart. With a shuddering, bloody gasp, Kanjiro fell silent, finally succumbing to the damage. The taiyoukai stood and then whirled, hurrying over to Shirizu.

He knew from long experience that she was done. Shirizu had never been a fighter and had had no real defense against the cat's talons and powerful jaws. Toga pulled her into his arms, wishing desperately that he had his Tenseiga. It was only a matter of a few moments before she breathed her last.

Toga glanced at Shimaku's still form, wondering how long the serpent had held on to the feral cat. His body was in ribbons. Slowly the inu taiyoukai stood, Sounga in hand.

It was then he heard a small gasp behind him and the full impact of the situation hit him with the cold weight of an avalanche. He turned slowly to look at Shirizu's horrified handmaiden. He realized with a numb sense of dread then, as he watched the girl flee, what was going to occur...what all this looked like.

Toga, the Inu no Taisho and Lord of the West, stood alone with a bloody sword amidst the bodies of the other three cardinal Lords.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha watched as mountains of scrolls, jars of ink, pens, and a few heavy books went flying, crashing and clattering to the floor in one sudden wave as Sesshoumaru lashed at them. The hanyou was surprised, very surprised, at his brother's reaction. It was almost entirely unexpected.

Thought flew from him a split second later as his back hit the suddenly clean desk and Sesshoumaru's lips met his in a kiss so brutal that he tasted the sweet, metallic tang of blood. Such wild passion was so unlike his brother, from all that he recalled. Exactly what sort of beast had his father awakened within his brother?

Not that he minded, really. With a subconscious growl he tore at Sesshoumaru's haori even as he heard the loud rip of his own leaving him, rent by sharp claws. Sesshoumaru apparently had not had the patience to deal with knots. He felt those same, deadly claws and cool fingertips suddenly running over his chest and redoubled his efforts, leaving them both naked to the waist. Sesshoumaru caught him in another vicious kiss and ground his hips against him, letting Inuyasha feel the full force of his arousal.

The door opened.

Miroku paused and blinked slowly as two pairs of golden eyes looked at him. Inuyasha's cheeks flushed slowly. The monk wondered briefly if Sesshoumaru was going to attack and he clutched his staff more tightly.

Sesshoumaru stood slowly, his glare baleful and murderous. "This had best be good, monk, or you lose your head."

"You coulda knocked..." Inuyasha mumbled as he sat up, painfully aware of his blush.

Miroku frowned and then looked at the floor. His countenance was so grave that it gave them both pause, and the brothers exchanged a glance. "I am sorry to interrupt you."

"What's wrong, Miroku?" Inuyasha frowned and swung his legs over the desk, hopping to his feet. He glanced down as he felt something wet - he was standing in a puddle of ink all over one of the very expensive rugs. // Heh... oops. //

Miroku simply shifted his grip on his staff and looked up at Inuyasha for a long moment. He had a distantly sad, haunted expression that the hanyou hadn't seen lurking in those violet eyes in years. Sesshoumaru noticed something else.

"Why do you wear the beads on your hand again, monk?"

Inuyasha's eyes shot to the beads in question. Sesshoumaru always HAD been an observant bastard...

"If I did not, my wind tunnel would run rampant."

"But...but that's impossible!" Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he scrambled over to his friend, almost making a grab for Miroku's hand in his sudden panic. "When we killed Naraku, it w...oh, no. FUCK no..."

Miroku kept his eyes on the floor. He struggled to maintain his calm and his acceptance, but it was so much HARDER than it used to be. Before, the void had simply been a fact of his life. He dealt with it as anyone dealt with a birth defect. It was simply there, an inescapable fact of life. Something you put up with and didn't give much thought, it was just...part of who he was.

He had accepted it so readily, then. Surely, he would do what he could to attempt to get rid of it...but he had been resigned to his ultimate fate. He had reached a measure of peace, knowing that some day, the void would consume him. Surely, he had feared it and dreaded it...but it had never weighed on him so much as it did now.

When they had finally killed Naraku and he had been freed of the curse, granted a new lease on life...everything had changed. The shadow of death that had haunted him all his life had fled, and with this stay of execution he was suddenly filled with something that he had never really experienced much before. Hope. He was no longer living on borrowed time - his time was his own.

And when he had finally settled down, gotten used to his life...found so much joy and even love... this dark cancer had surged back to life, mocking his free existence and laughing at the cruel joke of his hope. Despair was never an emotion that Miroku had dealt well with...indeed, despite everything of before, it was not one he had often felt.

He was feeling it now.

"But...but he can't be back. Miroku, we killed that bastard..."

"I was there. I remember what happened. But I can tell you that we must have failed. I can...I can feel him." Miroku felt the sarcastic smile on his face, heard the bitterness in his tone. "I don't know how, or why, or where he is. All I can tell you is that he IS."

"Then we will kill him again," Sesshoumaru stated simply. "For now, maintain your barriers. Enhance them further, if you and the raven can."

"Sairex was called away by your father. It seems it was urgent."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrow arched. That certainly meant something less than good was up. Did it have something to do with him? // Probably. // he mused darkly. // None of this turmoil would be necessary if he would have let me simply concede to the bastard's demands. I bear no desire to suffer through what he would surely bring upon me, but better that than to have these lands and all those that I care for suffer for me. Because of me. I am not worth all that. //

"This Sesshoumaru will look into the matter. Inuyasha, inform your wolf of the rebirth of Naraku so that he knows what to look for."

Inuyasha nodded. "Right." His glance went to Miroku, who was quietly slipping out the door. "Hey, monk...you gonna be alright?"

Miroku smiled, although it didn't reach his eyes despite the lightness of his tone. "Oh, I'll be fine. It is nothing I haven't dealt with before. We'll take care of Naraku and it won't be a concern."

Inuyasha's ears drooped further as he watched his friend turn and continue his slow retreat. "Poor bastard..." He glanced at Sesshoumaru and his expression darkened further. Sesshoumaru's eyes were focused and distant, full of the dead and hollow pain that had only recently begun to recede and allow some spark of life to shine through. // Fuck.. what's going on in his head now? What the hell do I do?! //

Sadly for Inuyasha, no answers were forthcoming.


	67. Chapter 66

Pride (In the Name of Love) 66 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So yesterday, in a fit of writing inspiration, I wrote a lil ten page story that could be considered either Sairex's backstory or the prequel to this story. It explains a few things - such as how Sairex and one Toga-Inu-no-Taisho know each other. There are slight references to said sidestory contained in this chapter, actually. It is not necessary to read it if you don't like...but I'd recommend it. You can find it by going to my author profile thingy and finding "A Crow Left of the Murder" (cunning title stolen from an Incubus album, but I always always loved it and it was fitting. Describes Sairex perfectly). Enjoy!

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Toga was sitting on the floor, head bowed and leaning against the wall when Sairex arrived. The raven landed on the windowsill before hopping in to the floor, still in his bird form. Yellow eyes widened and his head cocked to one side as he surveyed the carnage in the room. Toga didn't twitch, and for a sickening moment, Sairex feared his friend, too, had fallen in this inexplicable battle.

Sairex transformed in mid-hop, sliding next to Toga on his knees and reaching out for the inu, letting out a startled noise when Toga looked up at him. He clutched his chest before sitting down heavily. "Hn...Don't zcare me like dat, I thought you vere...vell."

"I didn't do it. Well. I did kill Kanjiro, but he killed the other two. He was mad."

Sairex frowned and leaned back against the wall next to his friend. "Vhat are you going to do?"

"You're the advisor, you're supposed to tell me."

Sairex snorted. "Dis is vhy you called me, den?"

Toga blinked and sat up straighter. "No, it isn't. Something's not right here, Sairex. Kanjiro was acting strangely all day...insulted me in perhaps the most dire manner possible, then later the same night came trembling to me and begging for help. He said Jormandar had his family and was threatening them to force him into action. That was why I called you...to see if you would go to his castle and see if his family yet lived and if there was anything that could be done for them."

"I zee..."

"The next thing I knew, Shirizu and I heard some awful noises coming from down the hall and we ran here to find Shimaku and Kanjiro tied together fighting. Shimaku was pretty well done for by the time we got here. Then..." Toga paused to take a deep breath. "He got past me and took Shirizu down. He made a few weak attempts to take me as well but by that point I could have blown him over. Even if I hadn't taken him, he would have probably died of his wounds."

Sairex frowned deeply and was silent for a long moment before speaking again. "You don't need me to tell you vhat vill happen because of dis...even vith you innocent, few vill believe it. It vill be too easy to blame you regardless den to zearch for da truth."

"Ironically, the North will liably hit us the hardest and the worst. Shirizu's people loved her dearly, almost fanatically. I am not sure how swiftly the east will respond, it depends on how deep Jormandar's influence ran or if he was playing Kanjiro in secret. Either way, I'm a demon of my word and I still want you to try to see to his family as I promised. They are innocent regardless of this. The south...I'm not sure of either. Shimaku was neither well loved nor trusted, but he was respected. But they tend to be...opportunists and thieves, bandits all. The opportunity to take me and mine down and topple what they could never hope to touch alone..."

Sairex nodded slightly. "Even if Jormandar keeps his filthy claws out of dis henceforth, you vill zee var."

"Our survival will depend on how coordinated our opposing number is and whether or not I can sway even one of them to non-aggression. If all three of them come for us, the West is done." Toga's voice was strained - the admission pained him deeply.

"Vell, ve vill zee vhat ve can do. Dey have to be made to understand dat even if da Vest is taken, den vhat? Vhat vill dey do vith it? Many are da demon dat dreams of taking you down zimply because you are ztrong, Toga...but few are da demons dat tink of vhat dey vould do if dey managed. And even ztill...ve can use dis to our advantage. Vhile I ztill tink it vill come to fighting, ve may be able to dissuade dem zimply because of you and your zons. You are...fearsome. Any one of da tree of you could take out a tousand times your own veight in demons before breakfast."

"Hn. Flattery will get you everywhere, raven."

Sairex grinned faintly. "I myzelf vill...zee vhat I can do to dissuade Jormandar. His living army I can...probably terrorize into disobedience. Da dead are mindless zlaves, however. I'm not zo sure dere is much I can do about dem...and Toga..."

"Yes?"

Sairex was staring at Sounga. "Vhat in da hell are you doing vith zometing like dat?"

"Do not worry about this, my friend. I subjugated this sword long ago. It does not control me, although it has tried more than once. As long as it remains in my possession, it is not a threat."

"Hn, enough to make a bird nervous...vell. I zuppose I best go zee about da cat's family. Den I vill come back to your castle and zee how tings are, yes?"

"Indeed."

Sairex snapped his fingers. "Oh...I almost forgot. Dere is a new problem."

"Of course there is. Why wouldn't there be?" Toga muttered bitterly. "What is it?"

"Zomeone by da name of Naraku has apparently been reincarnated. I don't know much about 'im but...from vhat I hear it zounds pretty bad. And his reappearance put a curse back on Miroku."

"A curse? What sort of curse?"

"Zome zort of...void...in his hand. Apparently it vas a curse placed on his line generations ago. It'll conzume him in time."

Toga blinked, and then frowned deeply. Sairex was doing his level best to relay the news calmly, but he could see how much it affected the raven. "Is there a way to fix it?"

"Killing dis Naraku zeems to be da easiest vay, but I intend to zeek out others."

"Then we will hunt for this Naraku thing."

"I tink your zons know a lot more about 'im dan I do, I'd talk to dem vhen you get back."

Toga nodded. "I shall. I suppose it would behoove me to start heading back sooner rather than later...I'd rather be safely home before everything explodes."

Sairex nodded and stood, stretching himself. "I vill go zee to da neko's family and return. Vill you be alright, my friend?"

"Yes, of course. I am curious, though..."

Sairex arched an eyebrow. "About?"

"I am not sure what you have told any of the others of our relationship. I haven't had the chance to speak with you since...I haven't had the chance to speak with you at all since you left me."

Sairex frowned and looked at the floor. "I didn't vant to leave you."

"I didn't mean it that way, Sairex."

The raven sighed. "Ultimately, it vas probably for da best. If tings had gone further, tink of da trouble den. And you might not have ended up vith your zons."

Toga nodded and smiled, but there was no humor in it. "I know... its just... do you know how much it hurt me, the last time I saw you? All those scars and...knowing what that monster was doing to you..." Toga growled reflexively at the memory, his eyes shutting.

"I got troo it because of you. Dere vas noting you could have done in any case, not den. Neither of us vere vhat ve are now. It may have ended poorly, but it vas a good zummer."

Toga smiled and then pulled the raven into a tight but brief hug. "I am glad you made it through it all more or less intact."

"Vell, you didn't, you vent and died...or I'd zay da zame ting."

"Ha, ha. Very funny. Mm. Do you think we should tell them?"

Sairex pondered this for a long while and then shrugged. "If it comes up, I vill. If not, I zee no reason to volunteer it."

Toga nodded. "It would be somewhat...strange. I must say, of all people I ever expected to see in my castle again, you were not one of them. It was a hell of a surprise when your monk brought me from the netherworld and I see you, of all creatures."

"Eh. I'm tricky like dat."

"You with a monk...a human monk, no less. I can't say I would ever have expected that."

Sairex blushed slightly but smiled. "Miroku is...a force to be reckoned vith. I have never before met a human vith zuch a ztrong presence and personality. And he's very zmart and vise, especially for his race."

Toga chuckled. "I see...so you're using him for his mind?"

"Kaa, more like he ztarted using me. Vhen ve vere zharing a body, you don't vant to know vhat he ztarted doing to me."

"I think I do want to know now, actually. What does it take to seduce Sairexannaras these days?"

Sairex blushed. "Kaa, lemme alone..."

"Are you happy with him?"

"Yes." Sairex's expression turned grim. "And I vill not allow a ztupid curse to take him from me any more dan I intend to let his mortality ztep in. I vill find a vay."

"He is a monk. He may not appreciate you altering his mortality."

"Kaa, most monks don't zeduce demons."

"Point taken. I will help you in any way I can, of course."

"And vhat of you, are YOU happy dese days? I know vhat you've been up to..."

It was Toga's turn to flush. "It is...very complicated. Nothing I do ends up simple, does it?... But I am. Despite the ramifications of what will happen when all this gets out...and I've no doubt it will after Kanjiro's recent outburst... and despite the fact that I should never have gotten involved like this in the first place...I do not regret it. My Sesshoumaru has always been very precious to me. Things just...matured...is all."

"Mm, you vouldn't be happy if everyting vas easy, anyvay. And it zeems you have a penchant for...mm... forbidden romances."

Toga blinked and then laughed. "Perhaps you are right...the only one I was ever with that society would have been properly accepting of was Sesshoumaru's mother. We know how long THAT lasted. All the rest...heh."

"Its because you're an animal."

"Oh, you have room to talk. Now go on, get out of here. Pleasant as this is, we both have business to attend and time is rather of the essence."

"I'll be home as zoon as possible. Jormandar isn't one to leave his victims alive long...but...if he already killed da cat, he might not even bother vith harming his family. Vhy vaste da energy killing dem vhen it'd zerve no purpose?"

Toga nodded. "Thank you, my friend. Be safe."

"Eh, vhat could go vrong vith zending a bird into a cat's house?" Sairex winked and then hopped backwards, transforming to his bird form as he did so.

"Well, when you put it that way, I'm wholly convinced of your safety. I shall see you at home." Toga smirked and allowed his own beast to overtake his body. With a final nod to each other, the two flew out the window and went their separate ways.


	68. Chapter 67

Pride (In the Name of Love) 67 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mm, no major note to put here...again,read the prequel (A Crow Left of the Murder) if ya haven't! But if you still decide not to, this chapter goes into a BIT more detail... prequel can be found at any of the three sites I host at under my profile.

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It was late and Miroku wasn't really expecting the soft knock on his door. He wasn't able to sleep, however, so he figured he might as well answer it. "The door is open."

The monk's eyebrows did arch when he saw Toga slide into the room. He was dressed only in a pair of loose pants and his hair was wet - obviously he had just come from the spring. "Monk...Miroku...I would have words with you if you do not mind."

Miroku sat up straighter and lit the lamp by his bedside. "Sure...what can I help you with?"

"It has come to my attention that there are things afoot that I do not have proper knowledge of...such as the rebirth of a creature called Naraku." Toga noticed the way Miroku's eyes darkened and his expression hardened. "I wish to do all I can to help you, but I need to know more."

"I will gladly tell you all I know of him."

Toga paused. "That...is not all." Miroku's eyebrow arched and the inu patriarch continued. "You were traveling with my younger pup for a very long time. I'd rather like to get the story behind a few things from an outsider's point of view. I have heard rumors."

"Ah, so you want the whole sordid tale, blow for blow?"

Toga arched an eyebrow and then leaned back, beginning to run a comb through his long silver tresses. "If you please."

Miroku nodded and began telling the whole story of Inuyasha's travels as completely as he could recall and in as much detail as he could muster, everything from Naraku to Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha's nastiest fights. The tale took the better part of the night.

Toga was gripping his comb tightly enough that Miroku was amazed it hadn't broken. The monk sighed and rested a hand on his shoulder. "I understand it was difficult to hear some of this. Inuyasha....well, he hasn't changed much. Matured a bit, learned to trust people more and accept himself more, yes. Sesshoumaru, however, has changed a great deal."

"He tried to kill his own brother with my fang...and failing that drove his hand through his chest."

Miroku nodded. "Yes. Sesshoumaru blamed your death on Inuyasha and hated him for it. He was jealous, too, of Tetsusaiga. Sesshoumaru coveted power. But he HAS changed a great deal since then."

"And you...I do not understand why it is you are not wedded to the slayer-woman."

Miroku sighed heavily. "It was a difficult decision. We cared deeply for one another...I still do love her in many ways. But our paths diverged. She wished to settle down and rebuild her family's village, to train the next generation of demon slayers. I...had a hard time with the thought of settling down. I felt I could do more good traveling the countryside and offering my services to those in need. Besides...after traveling so long by Inuyasha's side, I found I was...accustomed to his company. Inuyasha is an amazing person and I owe him my life many times over."

Toga smiled and nodded. "Good...although...how is it you can now settle down here, in this castle? I do not mind, of course, but would not your same argument as before hold water?"

Miroku fidgeted a bit. "Well...things are....different now, I suppose. I've never felt for anyone like I do for Sairex, and if it contents him to remain here...so too shall I."

Toga grinned. "That is good. He needs someone such as you."

Miroku paused for a moment before squinting at Toga. "How is it you two know each other? You seem rather...protective...of him."

"Hn, the raven is right. You are perceptive." Toga sighed and then offered Miroku a faint smile. "He came to this very castle when he was sixteen on a diplomatic trip with his parents. I was eighteen at the time and not yet Lord. I was only the Heir at the time. We met and...well, we had much to learn from each other. Our lives were very different. Sairex is wickedly smart and devious...as I'm sure you've noticed. He pointed out several tricks that I did indeed later employ when I built my lands up to what they are now. In turn, I showed him much of the world and...ah...things of a more emotional nature."

Miroku's eyebrows shot up. "You were lovers..."

Toga chuckled softly. "To use the term broadly, I suppose. We were both young and our blood ran hot. You know how it is, you're a young male yourself. It was...a summer thing. At the end of the summer his parents gave him to that damned dragon, as was the plan." Toga's claws were twitching at the memory.

Miroku smiled. "Well, then...I'm glad you got there first."

Toga blinked, then smiled. "He's right, you are a rare one for a human."

"Well, even though it is obvious you care for him, it is likewise obvious you do not intend to try to take him from me. One thing I am curious about, though..."

"Yes?"

"When we were performing the ritual to revive you...Sairex mentioned dogs not being his style and you informed him he'd never had one like you."

Toga chuckled and had the good grace to blush a bit. "Er...well... bit of a conditioned response, that. We've used those lines before a time or two."

Miroku grinned. "I see."

Both of them were abruptly startled from their conversation as part of the building exploded. Miroku gasped and snatched up his staff. "Something is wrong...I sense spiritual power!"

Toga beat him out the door.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku eyed the long-limbed, cloaked figure before him skeptically. "And this...technique...of yours...it truly works?"

Jormandar smiled as he held his fingers over the dark glass of his mirror. "Yes...though the spells I had to put in place to affect someone this strong took days. They were almost ruined when I inadvertently triggered them previously, so my control will not be complete as I wish..." His black eyes turned to his mirror and he spread his fingers. With a wicked grin, they began to twitch.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha's ears were flattened back as he stalked after Sesshoumaru. "Oh, you SO can not blame me for ruining that rug, YOU were the one that threw ink all over! Not to mention everything else!"

"It was your fault for seducing this Sesshoumaru, I was perfectly content to be left alone."

"Oh, yes, you resisted SO forcefully. You were helpless within the captivating spell of my gaze..."

"I did not know you even know a word as complex as 'captivating'."

"Asshole."

Sesshoumaru smirked slightly before flicking his gaze to his brother. "Why are you following me?"

"Because I said I was going to keep an eye on you and I damn well intend to."

Sesshoumaru paused outside of his bedroom door. Something felt...wrong. Scowling, he pushed open the doorway and stepped inside. He stopped dead as something black flashed in his mind. He felt as if a great many cords had suddenly been wrapped around his limbs and drawn tight, preventing him from moving. He struggled inwardly, but he had not been prepared for an assault. Further, with his mental state being as unstable as it had been of late...he was overwhelmed. In a numb, distant way, he watched as his consciousness was driven far back into his mind and chained. He could see and comprehend what he was doing, but he had no control whatsoever over his body.

Inuyasha had paused when he noticed Sesshoumaru's jerky movement. "Sessh?...Hey, whats wrong? Why'd you stop?"

Sesshoumaru was shocked and appalled when he heard his own voice. "This Sesshoumaru is tired of your presence, hanyou. You are not my Lord Father's true son and heir. I am. You are not fit to breathe the same air as either of us. I attempted to give it a chance, but time has only proven that I was correct. You are crass, crude, and uncultured. You are a shame to this House. Now get out."

Inuyasha's eyes were huge and he looked shocked and hurt. None of this was new to him, of course, he had heard these same things - from Sesshoumaru, no less - many a time. But things had changed between them. He no longer considered his brother an enemy - indeed, he had come to love him a good deal and rather thought it was returned in Sesshoumaru's taciturn, roundabout sort of way. "You...you don't mean that, Sessh...look, I'm sorry if I pissed you off..."

Sesshoumaru whirled, his golden eyes flashing malice. "If you do not get out, I will kill y ou."

Inuyasha's eyes narrowed and he flicked Tetsusaiga free of its sheathe, although he did not draw the blade. "What, this some sort of attempt to get me out of the way so you can do something stupid? I won't let you."

"You are not this Sesshoumaru's keeper. Die." Sesshoumaru launched forward with frightful speed, green-glowing talons leading. Inuyasha barely spun out of the way, the blow clipping him on the shoulder regardless and sending him crashing against the wall.

"You want to play rough, then? Fine, I can do that...you bastard...maybe I was wrong to assume you had a heart." Tetsusaiga flared a brilliant gold as the blade transformed. "I've cut you down before, I can again."

Then there was no time for talking as the battle began in full. Sesshoumaru leapt back, his light whip suddenly crackling to his life and lashing at Inuyasha in a rapid series of strikes. Inuyasha growled and blocked or dodged before lashing out with his own claws.

Sesshoumaru responded with Toukijin. "DRAGON STRIKE!"

Inuyasha yelped and barely got out of the way as the wall was obliterated with a terribly loud noise and a rush of falling stone. He leapt free of the building and darted into the courtyard, only to find Sesshoumaru pacing him...and then in front of him. Reflexively, he slashed with Tetsusaiga and kicked at Sesshoumaru's sword hand at the same time.

To his complete surprise, Toukijin went flying as his foot connected. "Hah! Looks like you're slipping, Sesshoumaru! Maybe the stupid hanyou knows a trick or two after all!"

// No, this moron does not know how to fight properly is all... // Inside, the real Sesshoumaru was lashing out viciously against the controlling influence. He felt he was making some progress.

Sesshoumaru darted abruptly inside the arc of Tetsusaiga's strike range, too close for the sword to be any use. His claws sizzled viciously as he snagged Inuyasha by the wrist, and his brother screamed and lashed at him with his free hand. Sesshoumaru caught that one, but suffered a nasty bite and several kicks at the price of avoiding Inuyasha's claws.

Inuyasha had no choice but to drop the sword, but he was stunned when Sesshoumaru snatched it up. Tetsusaiga immediately flared to angry life, sending jolts of blinding anguish up Sesshoumaru's arm. The smell of burning flesh was all too apparent.

The taiyoukai wasted no time in swinging Tetsusaiga. "WIND SCAR!"

Inuyasha gaped in horror at the brilliant beams of light coming his way. He didn't know how to dodge and just set himself in to block as best he could. Sesshoumaru had been too close in front of him. He didn't see Sesshoumaru drop the sword. Sesshoumaru was, in fact, gone.

Inuyasha was surprised to find that the attack had missed him. What could possibly have gone wrong? // Well, the attack IS narrowest at the front, but how did he MISS? Sesshoumaru doesn't miss on purpose and I had no chance to get out of the way. He whirled around and his stunned look grew to one of horror.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jormandar sighed as he felt the last threads of his control break. The spell had been too far decayed...too damaged when he had accidently triggered it on Toga in the past. He had known he would only have a few minutes, at best, in control...and Sesshoumaru had fought him viciously.

But still...it had been fun. And not a complete failure.

With any luck, he could pluck Sesshoumaru from the realm of the dead to exact his revenge. It would make things so much simpler.

"Beautiful..." Naraku purred in admiration as he watched the mirror. "Truly beautiful. You must teach this to me..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha discovered the reason Sesshoumaru had 'missed' just as he discovered the reason he was gone. Sesshoumaru had teleported right after he swung.

Directly into the Wind Scar's path. The hanyou screamed in negation and horror as he watched the wind blades decimate his brother's body, ripping him apart.

Sesshoumaru felt the pain keenly. His senses had returned to him just in time to feel his bones breaking or being severed, to feel the explosion of his flesh and the warm burst of blood. His consciousness fled as he fell into oblivion.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga let out an anguished howl and Miroku stared in stunned horror. It was a noise Miroku never wanted to hear again for all the rest of his days. The slight trace of latent magic he had felt earlier was gone, dissipated.

Inuyasha was screaming in horror himself, Tetsusaiga at his feet...along with the telltale crevices of the Wind Scar's origin narrowing and pointing at him like some sort of damning arrow.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"You do know that they have that sword that will allow them to simply resurrect Sesshoumaru..." Naraku eyed Jormandar, noting that the circle lord looked entirely too smug.

"Indeed. It works by destroying the imps of the underworld as they come to collect a soul."

"What else do you have up your sleeve, then?" Naraku asked, one eyebrow slowly arching.

Jormandar's eyes glittered and he smiled like a knife. "The imps will not come. They will be intercepted. If Sesshoumaru's wounds prove fatal, as I hope they do..." His gaze slowly turned to Karalichala. The raven demoness was lost deep in the depths of her spell. "It will be something very different that comes to drag him away, that no mere swing of a sword will stop before it is too late."


	69. Chapter 68

Pride (In the Name of Love) 68 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I would just like to remind people that I am as yet incomplete in my official knowledge of the IY series. While I do (as of yesterday =D) now technically own the entire anime, I haven't watched it all. (Working on rectifying that too, but my DVD player is stupid and I don't like sitting at my comp for so long with the way it's set up...). I've read thru volume 36 of the manga.

So sometimes I make mention of things or don't make mention of things that did or did not occur. There is no excuse for this save ignorance of the truth - forgive me. I AM (now that I have monies and the ability) working on fixing it. So please, be gentle. I may screw up. On occasion, however, you can consider it artistic license. ^^ I DO change SOME things to suit my purposes, although I try to keep those things relatively minor in nature. Like...I heard about Sesshy getting his arm back AND a new sword but...as I don't know the details, that was an event I chose to negate.

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Miroku cursed inwardly as his mind rapidly processed the scene before him. He cursed mentally as he made up his mind what he had to do. // Oh...Buddha, save me... // He lunged a moment before Toga did, catching the inu lord under the chin with his staff and holding on tight just as Toga sprang with a feral howl in the direction of Inuyasha. The monk had no illusions that he could overpower the inu - even taking him completely by surprise, Toga was simply far too strong for him.

But Miroku had seen the wild, crimson-eyed, unfocused rage suddenly aimed at Inuyasha. He knew in his heart that whatever had happened, there was more to it than met the eye. He couldn't even begin to fathom why Inuyasha would ever try to cut down Sesshoumaru, but he had faith that there had to be a good reason. He didn't hope to stop Toga, but he DID hope that he could hold him just long enough for the initial burst of unthinking anger to burn itself out.

Toga snarled viciously, reaching behind him and catching Miroku by the hips with his claws. He hoisted the monk over his head and sent him flying in Inuyasha's direction. The hanyou's eyes widened as he saw the human missile coming at him and he did his level best to catch Miroku. The impact wasn't pleasant for either of them and sent them both crashing to the ground.

However, it was enough. Toga's rage took a backseat to his grief and horror and he flew to Sesshoumaru's side, skidding to his knees. A low, keening moan tore itself from the depths of his soul and he hovered between wanting to clutch his broken pup to him and not wanting to risk damaging him further.

Sesshoumaru was, horrifically, still alive - it was easy to tell, considering that his chest was blasted open to the point where his erratically beating heart was visible. One lung and, in fact, the better part of his left side was simply gone. What was left of the taiyoukai was a burned and shredded mess laying in a veritable sea of blood.

Inuyasha, after quickly making sure Miroku wasn't too damaged, flew over to his fallen brother, tears in his eyes. "Oh god...oh, SHIT, Sessh...." It belatedly occurred to him that it still appeared that he was the one that did this as his father's wild, grief-torn gaze flicked to him. "I didn't...fuck, he did it himself...we were...we were just joking around and then we got to his room and...and he flipped and started saying all sorts of shit and attacked me...then grabbed my sword and teleported right in the middle of it...." Inuyasha was glad that his explanation was more or less complete - he was far too choked up to speak further.

Miroku winced, leaning heavily on his staff, before hurrying inside to find the castle healers.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The next two days were long and mostly silent. Toga had Sesshoumaru put in his own room to rest. The inu patriarch spoke to no one and indeed was more or less unseen. Sesshoumaru, incredibly, did not die from his wounds but the healers weren't hopeful. They were stunned that he lived at all, and expected him to breathe his last at any moment. There was nothing they could really do for him.

One of them finally informed Toga that it boiled down to time, luck, and Sesshoumaru's will to live. At that, Toga simply broke down and wept, carefully cradling Sesshoumaru to his chest.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru glanced around in a distant, fuzzy sort of confusion. // Where am I? // Everything around him seemed to be ghostly and unreal. Physical sensation seemed a mere memory. // Is this death? //

He noticed with a start that there was ...something... coiled in the shadows at the edges of his vision. Something dark and indescribably awful. He couldn't focus on it, but he could clearly feel the malevolent presence. It was there, lurking...waiting...but for what?

A further look revealed to him that his surroundings were familiar, now that he could begin to focus on them. Slowly things drifted in and out of his vision, like a room glimpsed through a thick and shifting fog. A voice startled him out of his attempts to figure out where he was. His first thought was that it was Sairex - the heavy and strange accent was the same. But no, this was a female voice.

"Let go, Zezzhoumaru."

"Let go?" Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes as he attempted to pick out the speaker. But no...this shifting, confusing place prevented him from seeing much of anything.

"Of life."

"I am not dead, then." It was more a statement than a question.

"Not quite. Vere tings normal, you vould have been taken to da Nethervorld by now and you vould be dead, yes. Ve have taken care of da imps, however. You are betveen life and death."

"I see...why would you do this?"

"Ve are giving you one final chance to zave your family and your lands. Your father is ztubborn and refuses to allow you to accept our terms, zo ve give da choice to you instead."

Sesshoumaru squinted, beginning to get the hang of this strange misty mirror-realm. Slowly the form of his companion swam into view - first a dark silhouette and then in ever-sharpening detail. Karalichala was pretty much what he expected. She was beautiful in the deadly way a striking snake is beautiful. Her hair was long and wavy, gleaming black to match her feathery wings. Her eyes were a pale shade of yellow and glittering with malice. She was quite pregnant, as well - far more so than Sesshoumaru would have guessed from what he know of the situation.

"Ah. You are the one that assaulted my advisor."

Karalichala stared at him. "Dat does not matter. Vhat matters is your choice. Ve are villing to give you dis last chance...or ve can vait until your vounds overcome you and take you from hell itzelf. Let go. Vhy do you cling to life vhen you vere zo recently looking for a vay free of it?"

Sesshoumaru was silent. Something about this did not sit right with him. "If you can have me anyway when I do die, and my wounds are truly so grievous that you are assured I have no choice but to expire, why do you bother to offer me this choice at all?"

Karalichala smirked. "Jormandar is impatient. And make no mistake, you ARE dying. It vill not be long."

Sesshoumaru didn't answer. He had finally begun to train his vision to see the room before him. It was his father's room. With a start, he realized he could see himself. He was standing across the room from his own body.

"Dis offer vill not last long. Let go, damn you, I have better tings to do dan vait around for you."

Sesshoumaru didn't even hear her. Karalichala blinked at the expression on the inuyoukai's face.

Sesshoumaru stared, unable to even begin to keep his expression controlled. Seeing his own body, mangled and wrapped in bandages, was hard enough. But that was nothing compared to the jolt he received when he caught sight of his father.

Toga was clutching him brokenly. Tears were streaking down his face and his body was quivering slightly, even as he slowly ran his fingers through Sesshoumaru's hair as he had always done when trying to comfort his pup. His expression was grief-torn, and he looked like his world was a heartbeat away from ending. In a way, it was.

Sesshoumaru was shaken to the core. He had always thought his father to be ultimately invincible. His previous death had been nothing but a fluke, or perhaps even a carefully laid plan to make sure his sons learned what they needed to of life - Sesshoumaru would not have put it past him.. He was more powerful than any other demon to walk the earth...he was a god made flesh, and the sun rose and set on his shoulders. With his hands, he could make or break the world. With a thought he could make all the creatures of heaven or hell bow to him.

And he was crying. For him.

Something clicked inside Sesshoumaru then. His spine straightened and a brilliant spark flared in his sunfire eyes. Slowly a smirk twitched his lips. The smirk widened into something of a grin as he whirled to face Karalichala. The raven squinted at the proud, defiant creature before her.

"This Sesshoumaru chooses to live."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku sighed heavily as he slowly made his way across the courtyard. His meditation had been uneventful and his legs were sore from where Toga had clawed him. // Could have been worse... I'm lucky he didn't kill me. //

The monk headed towards the door when something in the sky caught his eye. Something small and black...and speeding towards the very courtyard in which he stood. // Sairex! But how can it be, to cover that much ground in so short a time...//

The raven careened towards the courtyard and barely slowed his momentum near the ground. Miroku suddenly had the distinct impression that it had been more of a fall than a dive as the bird hit the ground, rolling head over tailfeathers several times and transforming as he went. It was, indeed, Sairex.

Sairex came to a halt by smacking into a wall, though the wild roll had stopped much of his momentum. He lay on his back, not bothering to move, his chest heaving and his eyes rolling. Miroku was next to him in an instant.

"Sairex! Sairex, are you alright?"

The raven forced his eyes to focus, his voice coming out as a mostly ineffectual croak on his first attempt. "Vater...need..."

"Dear Buddha, what's wrong? You're exhausted!" Miroku scooped Sairex up, saying a silent prayer of thanks that the raven was so lightweight. He carried him inside, gritting his teeth against the nasty little spikes of pain in his thighs. He set Sairex down in the nearest chair and scurried off to get him a drink.

After managing to down some of the water, Sairex climbed to his feet, trying to quell the tremors of exhaustion in his muscles. Miroku scowled and sat him back down.

"Miroku...I need to zee Toga."

"It...it can't wait?" Miroku frowned deeply. He already knew the answer - Sairex wouldn't have pushed himself so hard if it was something that could have waited.

"No...I vill be fine. Vhere is he?"

"He...he's in his room. With Sesshoumaru."

"Vell, I'm afraid I'll have to interrupt."

Miroku caught the raven by the shoulder. Sairex didn't miss his grave expression. "It's...nothing like that. It..." Miroku sighed. "Sesshoumaru is dying."


	70. Chapter 69

Pride (In the Name of Love) 69 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - This chapter brings me over page three hundred...and well over 150k words. You sure you guys aren't tired of it yet? XD Not that I'd stop regardless, but...

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Sairex winced as he flexed his wings experimentally, making his way down the hall. Dear gods, the cramps were killing him! It felt like someone had dropped a noose of glass-encrusted cable around his muscles and then jerked it tight. But, really...his haste had been necessary. His news really couldn't wait.

He tapped lightly on Toga's door and waited for a long moment. He got no response. One delicate eyebrow lifted before the raven opened the door and peeked in. "Toga?"

The growl he got in response was low and dangerous, filled with deadly promise. "Get out."

Sairex sighed softly to himself. "I just got back from da East, Toga. You need to know vhat I've learned."

Toga's growl increased in volume and he lifted his head. Sairex barely held a reaction in check. Toga's teeth were bared in a violent snarl. His eyes were red and swollen, his hair disheveled. Tears still trailed unchecked down his face, and the slightest of tremors shook his body. He had Sesshoumaru's battered and heavily bandaged form cradled against his chest. "Get...OUT!"

Sairex narrowed his eyes. "Toga, I cannot tell you how zorry I am for dis, but you cannot ignore y--"

"Sairex, I do not care if the land and everyone in it rots. This is the last time I will warn you. Get out or I will kill you." The slightest tinge of crimson had bled into Toga's eyes. The raven eyed him for a long moment, his heart aching for his friend's grief, before he sketched a quick bow and slid out of the room.

// Well, that went well... // Sairex sighed and made his way down the hall. // Hopefully the son is a bit more together than the father... // He rapped on Inuyasha's door a moment later, bracing himself mentally for impact. He was met with silence and almost gave up when Inuyasha's voice mumbled for him to come in.

"Sairex? What are you doing here?" The hanyou frowned and sat up straighter. He had been laying curled up in his bed with Kouga, worrying heavily about his brother and feeling generally terrible. Sairex noted that he seemed more composed than Toga had, at least.

"I have zome very important tings to discuss about my recent mission."

"Then why are you telling me? Shouldn't you be telling my father?"

"Your father is, for da immediate future, unable and unvilling to rule. He is far too upset."

"I know he's upset...so am I. But still, this is kinda not my thing."

"Lord Inuyazha, he vouldn't even listen to my report. Even if he had, he vouldn't have cared. He threatened to kill me if I didn't leave, and he meant it."

Inuyasha was silent for a moment before giving Sairex a wary look. "How...how is Sessh? The healers won't tell me anything and none of them are brave enough to check in on him."

Sairex sighed softly. "I...don't tink he has very long left. I'm zorry."

Inuyasha struggled to keep himself calm. He sucked in a long breath and let it out before managing to speak again. "Alright, tell me what's going on."

"Do you know vhat happened at da meeting your father attended?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Yeah, Miroku filled me in. Fucker framed the old man..."

"True enough...but da others are unlikely to believe dat vithout more zolid proof, and ve don't have time to get it. Da Northern armies are already preparing to march. I didn't pass troo da Zouth.""

"Great. So you went off to the East to save the cat's family, right?"

"Yes. Good news on dat front, at least."

Inuyasha's ears pricked forward. "Good news? I thought they were going to be the biggest pains in our ass..."

"Zo did I. As it turns out, however, Lord Kanjiro's mate knew all about Jormandar's influence. He openly held her and her daughters captive. After he had zprung his trap vith Kanjiro, however, he had no use for dem. He vas apparently in a hurry and took off to tend to zome other tings. Dey didn't need zaving by da time I got dere. But...vhen I told her vhat had happened, zhe believed me fully. Not only dat, zhe vas so grateful dat Toga made da effort to help deir family despite everyting dat zhe zent a peace treaty vith me. Zhe vill try to help convince da North and Zouth of Toga's innocence. I need to get dis treaty zigned immediately."

"That's great news!" Inuyasha couldn't help a bit of a grin. "The East was the biggest threat of the three. If they're on our side now, things might turn out after all. Gimme a pen. Sessh... " Inuyasha paused and swallowed, continuing in a bit more subdued tone. "Sessh taught me how to sign my name. And draw the family crest. I... don't think he thought I was really paying attention..."

Sairex handed over a pen and the treaty wordlessly. Inuyasha signed it and handed it back. "I vill zee dat dis is delivered. In da meanvhile...make zure da guard is on high alert. Ve cannot afford mistakes."

Inuyasha nodded. "Kouga and I will take care of it."

With a bow, Sairex headed out of the room to see that the treaty was sent off properly...and then to take some much needed rest.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex blinked several times as he entered his room and caught Miroku in the act of rubbing some fashion of herbal salve on a series of punctures along the side of his thighs. "Vhat da 'ell happened to you? Lay down." Miroku arched an eyebrow as the small jar of salve was whisked out of his hands.

"Well...er...I rather picked a fight with Toga just long enough for him to NOT mindlessly kill Inuyasha. He simply reached back, latched on, and then threw me."

Miroku sighed and relaxed as Sairex took over massaging the remedy over his injuries. "You know, you could give a less pure-hearted person ideas with a touch like that."

Sairex snorted. "Much as I vould enjoy letting you ravish me or ravishing you myzelf, I barely have da ztrength to remain upright. Vhat tanks do I get? Oh, Zairex, get out of 'ere or I kill you. Hmph."

"Toga wouldn't have hurt you, I don't care what he said. It's just his grief talking. What an awful thing it would be, to outlive your own son."

"Vell...does it count dat he didn't? Technically?"

"I'm not sure. Most people don't get another chance. But I'll say no, it doesn't count. Poor Sesshoumaru...to go through all he has and now this besides. I did sense some lingering trace of spiritual magic in all this mess."

"I can't imagine othervise. Likely it vas a trap left behind. No new magic zhould have gotten past you."

"I assure you, it did not."

"If he does not vake he vill die. He cannot eat or drink like dis."

"Hmm...I wonder if Kagome has any knowledge and could help..."

"Vhat is a Kagome, again? I dimly remember you mentioning da name..."

"A human girl. A priestess from five hundred years in the future. She's saved me and the others with some of her future concoctions more than once." He noticed Sairex's hands had stilled and he blinked, looking up at the raven's somewhat queer expression. "What?"

"Da future?...Vell, if you have access to da future, dat explains how dey hid Lady Rin from Zetsukosei a vhile back. I vas painfully curious how da girl moved troo time like dat."

"Yes. It's rather a long story and I will tell you if you like, while you rest."

Sairex snorted and flopped back next to Miroku with a smirk. "Dis bird is a bit old for bedtime ztories."

Miroku chuckled and gathered his raven into his arms, pressing a kiss to the top of his head. "Oh, quiet, you, and let me tell you the story."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

// Stupid body. // Sesshoumaru thought to himself. Really, the sight of his own mangled form was more than a little disconcerting to the taiyoukai. He could see, despite the bandages, that there were definite pieces missing. Secretly, he was as surprised as the raven demoness that he was still clinging to life.

Worse than the sight of his broken body, however, was his sire's heartrending grief. It made his soul hurt. He had tried all he could think of to communicate his presence to Toga, but with no luck. The elder inu hadn't left his side in days, not since the moment he had been brought to his room. Sesshoumaru had never even begun to imagine that anyone could ever feel so very strongly about him, to care about him so deeply as to be so affected. He ached to offer Toga any sort of solace, no matter how minor.

// Perhaps if he had not been so quick to rid us of Sairex, he might have sensed something. //

He sensed the raven demoness' return well before he saw her. Without a second thought he curled his youki around his fingers and whirled, his light whip sizzling out and scything through Karalichala's midsection. She gasped and staggered back a step before pasting a sneer on her face.

"You can't hurt me here, you fool. You're noting but a ghost."

She did indeed appear entirely unharmed despite his direct hit. However, Sesshoumaru was intrigued by her reaction. If she truly could not be harmed here, why had she reacted so strongly? It could have been mere surprise...but the taiyoukai filed the information away. // Perhaps it is as it was with my vision. I may merely need to train myself to learn how to use my abilities here. //

"Do you really insist on prolonging dis foolishness, dog? Do you enjoy vatching your father zuffer because you insist on continuing to draw breath, even knowing you can never vake up?"

"No. This Sesshoumaru does not appreciate the pain you have caused my Lord Father, and my vengeance will not be merciful. However, even if all you say is true and I ultimately must end up in your possession regardless of my decisions...I intend to make things as inconvenient as possible for you."

Karalichala ground her teeth in frustration before whirling and vanishing. Sesshoumaru smirked to himself, considering their meeting something of a minor victory. Once again she had left in frustration, unable to convince him to give in to her demands. Sesshoumaru assumed that it was not a lack of desire to force him to comply, but a lack of ability. If she could so easily take him, force him into what she wanted...he figured she would have already done so.

// So long as my body lives and I am not truly dead, I do not think she has power over me. But I cannot remain thus and my body will perish should I not wake up. And should my soul remain here, I do not believe it will. But how to get back into my body?... //


	71. Chapter 70

Pride (In the Name of Love) 70 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - A delightful, unexpected twist? Oh yes. Lets.

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"I think that's a great idea. If you can pry him away from the old man long enough..." Inuyasha grinned slightly.

"Vell, I tink he vill allow it if he tinks ve might actually be able to zave his life."

"I can't stick around with you guys when we get there though. You know what's all going on here. So I'll drop you off and pick you up tomorrow morning?"

Miroku smiled. "That would be wonderful. Might we bring some gold with us to pay for what we will need?"

Inuyasha nodded and fished around in his haori before tossing a small sack of coins to Miroku. "Kagome will know what to do with it and turn it into their future money stuff."

Miroku smiled. He was looking forward to visiting Kagome almost as much as he was looking forward to finally seeing the land from which all the wonderful things she always brought came from. He and Sairex had come up with the idea of going to Kagome's time to do a little research and bring back medical supplies to try and keep Sesshoumaru alive long enough for his body to recover.

Inuyasha glanced at Sairex. "You...MIGHT want to consider hiding the wings...there aren't a bunch of obvious youkai running around in her time and humans don't fly."

Miroku rubbed his thigh ruefully. "They do if you throw them hard enough..."

Inuyasha couldn't help a snicker. Sairex, meanwhile, was apparently thinking. After a moment he murmured softly. His wings wavered and then vanished.

"I didn't know you could just...wave them away like that..."

Sairex grinned. "I can't. It's just an illusion, dey are ztill dere."

"Well, lets go. I need to get back as soon as possible so I can go over defenses and shit with Kouga. I wasn't planning on being in charge again like this." Very soon, Miroku, Sairex, and Inuyasha were on their way.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kagome blinked sleepily as she stumbled towards her door at the insistent knocking. It was still very early and she hadn't planned on waking up for several hours yet. With a yawn she opened the door, surprised to see a familiar hanyou waiting on the other side. "Inuyasha? What are you doing here?" She yawned again, then gave him a sleepy hug in greeting.

"Heh, I wish it was just a social visit. I can't stay...was just dropping somethin' off for you."

"What's that?"

Kagome let out a little squeal of delight when Miroku's head popped around the corner, the monk grinning widely. She launched herself at him and gave him a tight hug, which he was more than happy to return. "Miroku! Oh, its so good to see you, it's been years!"

"It's good to see you as well, Kagome. I wish our visit was on lighter terms."

Kagome looked about ready to respond when she stopped dead, unlatching herself from Miroku and peering past him. Sairex was leaning casually on the wall, watching the proceedings silently. Kagome stared at him, her eyes widening slowly. "Wh..."

Sairex slid away from the wall and bowed formally. "It is a pleasure and an honor to meet you, Lady Priestess. I have heard quite a bit about you."

Kagome blinked as she attempted to place the strange accent coloring his words. "You're a demon," she stated flatly. Sairex's eyebrows arched and he smiled.

Inuyasha felt the need to interject. "Kagome, this is Sairex...he's our chief advisor and Miroku's mate."

Kagome's jaw dropped and she stared wide-eyed at Sairex, then at Miroku. Miroku blinked and rubbed the back of his neck with a slight grin.

"What?"

"It...its good to meet you, Sairex..." she finally managed, offering him a faint smile. "Will you all come in?"

"Can't, gotta get home...they'll fill you in. I'll be back in the morning." Inuyasha gave her a quick hug. "Sorry to run, but I have to."

"Okay...I understand. Well, I don't, but I'm sure I will."

Inuyasha grinned and was gone.

Once they were safely ensconced in Kagome's apartment, Sairex flexed his wings, the illusion vanishing. His eyes were darting around the room, drinking in the sight of all the unfamiliar objects strewn about.

"So...not that I'm not thrilled to see you and I fully intend to sit you down for a long chat, what's the bigger reason you're here?" Kagome finally asked Miroku. Her eyes never left Sairex.

Miroku paused in his examination of a clock and sighed, setting his staff down and then sitting on the couch and gesturing for her to do the same. "We...and by we I mean all of us living at the Western castle...have been the victims of several attacks of late. You were informed what happened to Sesshoumaru..."

Kagome nodded. "Yeah...poor guy, I felt bad for him."

The monk nodded. "Well, plenty of other things have happened...but right now, we're again here because of Sesshoumaru. We aren't fully sure on how it happened, whether or not it was influenced by outside sources or not, but Sesshoumaru took the full force of a direct hit from the Wind Scar."

Kagome gasped in shock. "But...but why did Inuyasha-"

"He says he didn't. Sesshoumaru grabbed his sword, ignored the burn, threw a Wind Scar and then teleported himself into the line of fire."

The girl's eyes were wide. "Oh...oh no..."

Miroku sighed heavily. "The Inu no Taisho is terribly upset to the point of being incapacitated, so Inuyasha is running things for a bit. Sesshoumaru....was torn apart. I do not know what keeps him alive, but he is not waking up. If he doesn't wake, his body will wither and die. We can't make him eat or drink like this."

"He's comatose...?"

Miroku blinked. "Er..."

Kagome nodded. "Right. I know what we'll need, for starters anyway. IV fluids, feeding supplements...I know he doesn't eat our 'human food' but we have to get some nutrition in him...bandages, antibiotics..." The more Kagome added to the list, the blanker Miroku's expression got until she finally stopped and gave him a slightly sheepish grin. "I'll take care of it. Maybe...I'll even come back with you to make sure some of this stuff is done right. I don't know a whole lot of medical crap but I'm sure I can find some books. Anything is better than just leaving him there to live or die according to fate."

Miroku nodded. "Oh, indeed. Thank you. I knew coming here was a good idea."

Kagome's eyes again slid over to Sairex. The raven was flipping through an atlas, looking terribly intrigued. "Inuyasha wasn't serious, was he?"

"About?"

"Him being your...your mate?"

"Of course he was."

Kagome stared at Sairex for a long moment before grinning at Miroku. "Here. Come with me. I'm going to give you some information to look through, and then I want to have a private chat with him."

"Ah. Of course...." Miroku smiled and allowed her to escort him to the room she had set up as an office. She set Miroku up on her computer and pulled up a medical website. After showing the monk how to move about the page - he found it extraordinarily fascinating - she headed back out towards the living room, pausing only for a quick stop to her bedroom first. She rummaged around in her closet until she found what she was looking for.

Sairex turned slowly as she approached him. He had felt a blaze of spiritual energy and wasn't overly surprised to find himself staring at an arrow that burned with light. Kagome had it nocked and drawn, aimed right for him. Her voice was soft and threatening.

"Just what the hell do you think you're doing?"

"Vell...I VAS looking at dese maps. I zuppose I zhould be asking you vhat YOU are doing, however..." Sairex narrowed his eyes slightly.

"How DARE you?"

Sairex arched an eyebrow. "Really need a bit more dan dat...I'm ztill a little lost..."

"I don't know what you did to seduce poor Miroku and lure him in..."

Sairex snorted. "Me? Zeduce HIM? More like I failed to resist 'im."

"Miroku is the biggest womanizer I've ever met. I've never seen him so much as blink twice in the direction of another male."

"People change." Sairex's voice dropped a notch, his gaze hardening. "Lower your bow, Priestess. I do not take vell to threats, nor do I warrant dis zort of treatment."

"You might have somehow fooled Miroku, but you aren't fooling me. I can feel your soul, your aura...you're quite possibly the most wicked creature I've ever faced. I don't know what you're plotting, but I won't let you hurt Miroku."

Sairex eyed her silently for a long moment. "Hm. You really are quite perceptive, aren't you..."

"I'm fairly good at what I do. I don't know what you're planning, but I feel its malevolence."

Sairex eyed the blazing arrow for a moment before shutting his eyes and smirking a bit. "Vell, I give you credit. Few zee past my barriers. And credit, too, for getting da monk avay zo I couldn't use him against you. Protecting him. Commendable."

"Will you leave peacefully?"

"No, I'm afraid I cannot do dat." Sairex sighed and stretched before flexing his talons and then cracking his fingerbones, giving Kagome a wicked smile. "It is a zhame, really, I vas ztarting to enjoy my new life...and now you've ruined everyting. Here I vas, being all happy. I'm afraid you vill have to die."

Kagome gasped as Sairex dove for her, releasing her arrow with a silent prayer that her aim was true. She didn't think she would get a second shot.


	72. Chapter 71

Pride (In the Name of Love) 71 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Gods, I'm mean. I'm sorry. I had to. XD No one saw that one coming. I just... wanted to give y'all a..."WAIT...WHAT?!?!?" moment... Teehehehehe... I literally cackled with evil glee every time my email lit up with a new review notification...I'm such a bad person. XD I'll make it up to you all though... hehe... man. I better start being nicer or someone will take away my writing license, then where would we be? XD...got SO many reviews yesterday, though...I enjoyed it. XD XD XD XD

Sesshoumaru - ... *sighs* *cracks Jessi over the head with a board and watches her hit the dirt, eyes spinning* -_- *smirks and does it again just because he can* Hmph. *glances at her computer* Bah. *grabs the chapter and thrusts it in Kagome's face* Make it go, miko. At least the READERS don't have to be tormented...

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Sairex twisted out of the way as the arrow blazed past him, yellow eyes widening. It impacted with the glass door leading out to the balcony with a tremendous sound and a crystalline shower of glittering shards. Sairex scrambled backwards even as Miroku came flying into the room. "Ack, you vere ZERIOUS?!"

Kagome nocked another arrow with a glare and made to fire it. Sairex wasn't about to dodge a second shot - one quick motion of his fingers froze the priestess in place before she could release it.

Miroku gawked for a moment before managing to speak. "What in the name of all that is holy is going on?!"

"Your priestess friend zeems to have gotten da vrong idea about me, love. And I rather...er...misjudged exactly how zerious zhe vas."

Miroku looked at Kagome with a faint frown. "So I see..."

Sairex huffed at his bangs. "And I zuppose I provoked her a bit. I didn't tink she'd actually zhoot at me. I'm not exactly da get-in-your-face-and-claw-you-up zort of demon, vhen it comes to combat...but you do have a very loyal and devoted friend, Miroku. If a bit...quick to fire." Sairex sighed heavily and walked over to stand before Kagome. "I vill release you zo you can move...but please...put down da bow and listen to vhat I have to zay. Vill you do dat?"

Kagome found she could nod the tiniest bit. With some trepidation, Sairex released his hold on her. The bow continued its earlier motion and sent the arrow whizzing forward, nearly hitting Miroku. Kagome yelped and hurried to apologize before pointing an accusing finger at Sairex. "Miroku, he's a liar and is playing you! Can't you feel the evil in him?!"

Sairex sighed. "Dere is much evil in me, my dear priestess. Very much. But it is not MY evil."

Kagome's rage and conviction faltered. "What?"

"I have taken da zouls of many, many vicked demons. I have bound dem zo dey can never escape, and hold dem vithin me. It is deir malice and hatred you feel, Lady Priestess. I myzelf...am no zaint, for zure, but I'm not EVIL. Look again, more closely."

Kagome stared distrustfully at the raven but slowly reexamined him. She found the immediate core of malice but, in looking at it more closely, she discovered it WAS tightly bound and separate. Sairex's soul was much like the youkai she had befriended and traveled with...not clean and pure, tarnished by his share of dark deeds, but neither was it wicked or cruel.

"Do you REALLY tink Toga vould let me run around vith important tasks and live in da zame castle as his zons if I vere a monster? He'd have chopped me off at da knees a long time ago."

"Toga?"

Sairex blinked, then flushed a bit. "Er..."

Miroku was happy to interject. "That is the given name of Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru's father. The two of them are quite familiar with each other."

"Yes...vait..." Sairex's eyes widened a bit and he turned to peer at Miroku. "Exactly...vhat is it dat you know, monk?"

"Oh, everything. He and I had a long chat. You were lovers."

Kagome stared. "You were--"

"Kaaa, ve vere just kids, it happens..." Sairex was blushing deeply and very studiously not looking at Miroku. Miroku was smirking - he didn't mind what had went on in the past. It was, after all, the past. The very distant past.

"If you were BOTH kids that makes you pretty old...last I heard, the Inu no Taisho had been around forever. Thousands of years."

Sairex mumbled. "He's two years my zenior....anyvay, dis is HARDLY da point. Da point is, I'm not evil, but I'm caging evil zpirits. Dat is vhat you zense."

"Oh..."

Sairex smiled as the look of understanding dawned on her face. "Dere. Now can ve perhaps refrain from pointing arrows at me in da future?"

"I...Oh, I'm so sorry! I just thought...and I didn't want to see Miroku hurt....its just so hard for me to believe you're REALLY together and...I...I let myself jump to conclusions..."

"Why is it so hard to accept that we're together?" Miroku raised an eyebrow.

"Well, he's a demon...and...well...you're a lech but you always aimed for women....and...you ARE? Really? Seriously?"

Miroku chuckled. "Yes, Kagome, really and truly."

"But how? I know you're a sucker for a pretty face and all that, but how in the hell did he seduce you?"

Sairex rolled his eyes and Miroku let out a long-suffering sigh. "I already tried to explain dis."

"He didn't, Kagome. I went after him...and I rather was smitten before I'd ever seen his face."

A curious expression appeared on Kagome's face. Miroku chuckled, knowing full well what question was coming.

"We were sharing a body at the time. No perverted connotations intended. He rescued my soul from being snagged by the same beast that had held Sesshoumaru captive. So I was with him and got to know him rather intimately before we ever met each other face to face."

Sairex blushed and mumbled something about some of their sharing being a bit too intimate at some points and not to let lecherous monks claim they needed to stretch out and relax and take control, but Kagome didn't catch it.

"I just...wow. If you're happy, I'm really happy for you. I'm just surprised. I didn't think you'd ever even kissed a guy..."

"There was that game with the questions and the...dares...that you made Inuyasha and myself play."

"Well, that didn't count. Besides, it took you a good half hour to come to after he clobbered you for making good on that dare." Kagome giggled at the memory. Inuyasha really hadn't been expecting Miroku to ACTUALLY kiss him despite the dare.

"You have a strange perception of what does and does not count, my friend. It was still a kiss despite its...pains. He bit me, too."

Kagome suddenly squinted suspiciously at Miroku, then Sairex. "Hey, wait a minute...I thought all you...you demon types marked your mates. I don't see anything on him."

"Kaa, I'm a bird. Vhat do you vant me to do, peck a hole in 'im?"

"I'm rather content not to have any more holes in me than I already have, thank you...."

"It's da beast youkai dat do da whole...bite-claiming ting. Dogs, dragons, cats, wolves...us raven zorts are far more refined dan dat."

Miroku rolled his eyes. "Refined. Indeed. My dear Kagome, allow me to allay your suspicions and set your mind to rest." Before Sairex could react, Miroku snagged him around the waist and yanked him close, capturing his lips in a wild and hungry kiss.

Kagome's eyes could not possibly have gotten any wider and her jaw hit the floor as she stared. Sairex's reaction was relatively similar, although his cheeks flushed as his eyes fluttered shut, his mind shuddering to a halt and leaving him in somewhat of a daze.

Miroku released him and then smiled benignly, dusting some invisible particles off his robes. "There." Noting that he was getting two slack-jawed stares for entirely different reasons, the monk snickered. "What's the matter with you two?"

"You...you..."

"My dear Kagome, I think you're blushing. Perhaps you're something of a voyeur yourself, is that it?"

"Wh-what?! No way! Miroku, you're such a lech!" She immediately whirled to hide the fact that she was beet red, well aware that yes, she HAD been staring.

"You say that like it's a bad thing..."

Sairex was blushing at least as hard as Kagome. "How about ve focus on vhy ve came here in da first place, yes? Zezzhoumaru's not getting any better vith us just ztanding 'ere..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru barely restrained himself from huffing in annoyance. He was SESSHOUMARU, he did not HUFF. The rather annoyed puff of air that came from him was quite obviously something else. Over the course of the past day, he had done everything he could come up with to attempt to make the living world notice him in some fashion. However, both Sairex AND Miroku had left early in the morning and he had felt they were his best chance.

So he had went to Inuyasha. He had tried yelling. He had tried placing a hand on his brother's shoulder and discovered it went through. He had even tried kicking him in the face and light-whipping through him. Then he tried kicking him in the face again. It didn't work any better than it had the first time, but it made him feel slightly better. // Hmph, serves him right for being too spiritually dense to see me. //

The raven demoness had appeared a few times, but he had angered her and driven her away every time. So it was with some surprise that he felt a different presence in this realm he was prisoner of. It was distantly familiar. He turned slowly.

Naraku.

A snarl twitched just behind Sesshoumaru's lips as he eyed the smirking, crimson-eyed demon. "To what do I owe this honor?"

"By which you mean to ask how I am standing before you or what I am up to this time?"

Sesshoumaru's glare was as icy as eternal winter. "Both."

"It seems the nearly extinct tribe of raven demons have a plethora of tricks involving death and the dead. As you can see for yourself. It is a shame she enacted the spell a bit too early. We all assumed you were going to die...and yet you tenaciously cling to life. Had you died as planned, the shadow-beast I am sure you can sense following you would have been free to grab you and subdue you, bring your soul to us."

"And because I yet live, the beast cannot touch me."

"No, not while you have a connection with your corporeal frame."

Sesshoumaru smirked - all the more reason to live. Naraku was quick to dash that smirk, however.

"You know as well as we do that your body is dying. Your wounds may have stopped bleeding, but your life force weakens by the moment. Your injuries were too great. It is merely willpower that has held you together this long."

Sesshoumaru said nothing. He hated knowing that this hateful creature was right, but...he could not deny it. He had seen the decline his body was taking - how his breathing had grown more shallow and raspy, taking on a nasty liquidy sound. His skin had taken on an ashen, gray color. He could tell by the way his hair looked drenched and how sweaty and flushed he was that his fever must have been tremendous.

And he knew, too, that his father expected him to die soon and that was why he had not left his side. Had he thought Sesshoumaru would recover, he would not have felt the need to remain with him at ALL times - he would have let the boy rest some and attended other important manners. He had attempted with trembling fingers to use a damp cloth to bring down his fever, had made the attempt to get at least some water down his throat, had done a huge number of small things that had ultimately failed. His despair hurt Sesshoumaru worse than anything else that had gone on or was yet going on. Ultimately, Toga spent most of his time curled up against Sesshoumaru's broken body, lost in his anguish.

Sesshoumaru leveled his gaze back on Naraku. "I will be no more forthcoming with you than I was your associates. This Sesshoumaru will not play your games and I will live as long as I am able to thwart you."

Naraku's voice was a low, pleased murmur. "Oh, I certainly hope so..."

Sesshoumaru slowly lifted one ice-silver eyebrow. "Explain."

"So imperious, even like this. Sesshoumaru, I wish to make you a deal."

"I do not trust you."

"Nor should my ... associates... as you put it. They do not know I am here."

"This Sesshoumaru will hear your offer but makes no promise to heed it."

"I am a prisoner, albeit in a different fashion than you. The raven demoness has power over me. I wish to be free."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "I see... and you wish for me to help in some fashion, which means you fully expect me to be able to escape."

"Yes. I will aid you in your escape and assure your body lives."

"And you believe I would truly turn you loose on my world again? Voluntarily? And I am to expect you to play nice?"

"I said nothing about playing nice. This deal extends only as far as our continued captivity."

"Thank you for revealing the knowledge to me that you are under their sway...but this Sesshoumaru will make no pact with you. I will escape on my own and live on my own."

Naraku's eyes narrowed and he bared fangs at Sesshoumaru. "You do not want to invoke my wrath, Sesshoumaru."

"Oh? I do not?" The taiyoukai sighed in exasperation. "Or what, exactly? You'll kill me? Too late, try again. Hurt me and mine? They already suffer and there is nothing you can do to me that has not already been done to me. I find this whole business of constant evil and suffering caused to me and my family to be utterly exhausting and it grows annoying."

Naraku scowled, not having a good answer or a sufficient threat. Sesshoumaru was right - pretty well anything he could come up with immediately would have no major effect on the taiyoukai, and trapped as he was, he could not effect much damage out in the living world.

"Be gone. I am done with you." Before Naraku could react, Sesshoumaru's whip sizzled out and impacted with his side. A faint line of crimson opened along his arm and the kumo glared daggers.

"I will not forget this, Sesshoumaru..." Naraku ground out and vanished.

Sesshoumaru kept his expression flat for a moment before allowing a grin to twitch his lips. He had injured Naraku, seen the blood...and that meant he was learning to make physical contact with others in the realm.

// When I am sure I am fully able to do as I wish... the raven demon has a surprise for her when she comes to call. //


	73. Chapter 72

Pride (In the Name of Love) 72 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - New sidestory, "Wicked Game" was posted yesterday afternoon at all my usual sites, you can find the link under my profile.

My work schedule is really screwball this week so my updates might end up a little off - if such is the case, my apologies. I'll try to get one out daily. Might not make it on Thursday, Ill be out of the house most likely.

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"Well..." Kagome was musing as she looked at the long list of supplies she needed. "The bad news is that it's Sunday. A lot of shops and stores are closed today. Besides, a lot of the stuff we need? I'm not sure we can easily obtain it in one day short of raiding a hospital. And there is no WAY they would give us half of this stuff anyway."

"Leave dat to me. Just bring me to dis hospital place." Sairex smiled. Kagome frowned.

"I'm not going to let you hurt anyone and I really don't want to be on camera stealing anything."

Sairex rolled his eyes. "I have a vay vith...vell. To put it zimply, I can use my powers to make da humans villingly give us vhat ve need. I vill convince dem dat ve are officials picking up zupplies from another place dat ran out dat is having an emergency zituation. Dey vill give us all you ask for, and aftervard, dey vill be mildly confused at da unusual request but von't question it or look into da matter further. Humans are very good at overlooking tings dat zhouldn't happen."

"Alright, then. But you'll need to wear something a bit more...modern. Both of you. It will make our lives easier. And Miroku...the staff stays here."

Miroku stared at her as if she had told him he had to leave an arm or leg behind, clutching his shakujou protectively. Kagome was about to roll her eyes when she finally noticed the rosary around his hand. Her eyes widened significantly.

"M...Miroku, why do...why are you wearing that?"

Miroku hadn't mentioned it earlier because he had, quite simply, forgotten. He slowly lifted his hand, staring at it with a deep frown. "Well...my wind tunnel came back."

Kagome gasped in horror. "But...but that's impossible! How could it?!"

"We are assuming it means Naraku has returned as well, although we haven't had any other overt signs."

Kagome looked ill, or like she was about to faint. "Oh god, Miroku, I'm so sorry..."

"Don't worry about it." The monk said with a smile, turning to look out the window.

Sairex remained silent, although his eyes had narrowed, his expression grim and dark. Kagome noticed the look, however, and it made her momentarily nervous. "Well..." she said with a forced cheerfulness, "How about we get going? When we're done, I'll take you guys out to dinner and we can go home to enjoy the rest of the evening."

Finding clothes for the two males was not as easy a task as she had assumed it would be. Miroku was, luckily, close to the same size as her fiance - who was still out on business. Sairex was another matter. Everything was too big for the petite raven or fit very poorly, and then there was also the fact that he had wings, even if they were hidden from the naked eye by an illusion spell.

"Jeez, how do you find ANYTHING to wear?"

Sairex smirked. "Vell, I have it custom made. Or I zimply do not vear a zhirt. I never used to."

Miroku stopped picking at his own shirt long enough to give Sairex a wolfish grin. "He has some delightful tattoos." He went back to examining his own clothes - these 'jeans' were a decided change from his typical robes, and he was very unsure if he liked them or not.

Sairex flicked a glance to Miroku and stared for a long moment. His pale cheeks flushed slightly and he immediately busied himself in the closet with Kagome. Miroku immediately decided the clothes were acceptable if they could garner that sort of reaction, his grin widening. His look turned rather mournful as he set his staff down.

"Well, I guess we'll just have to deal with you looking really old fashioned. I can't let you cut holes in these clothes...and you said you can just...make people forget stuff?"

"Dey vill not remember me."

"Good. Lets go, then. I want to get this over with." Kagome had some serious doubts that this would work, but...better to try and see how it went than worry too much.

Soon the three of them were off in a van Kagome had borrowed from a friend. Sairex spent much of the trip reviewing information, his sharp eyes scanning the words on various pages. He requested Kagome let him take a brief trip into another hospital instead of their target. She did, and soon Sairex returned, wearing a uniform and casually carrying a clipboard.

"Well...I suppose that'll work..." Kagome said with a grin.

"Kaa, it zmells ztrange in dese places...lets make it fast. I vasn't going to go troo all dis..." Here Sairex gestured to the uniform. "..but dere are too many people in dese places. I can't keep dem ALL under my control zo it's better if most of dem just don't ask questions."

"This will never work," Kagome stated with a groan as they finally reached their destination.

"Yes, it vill...just let me do da talking unless I need help."

"And what shall I do?" Miroku quirked an eyebrow.

"Moral zupport?"

"You want HIM to give you MORAL support?" Kagome giggled. Miroku sighed and rolled his eyes.

"I am so abused by these people I call friends... Kagome, I will have you know I have not thieved, swindled, or womanized in a very long time. Not a single inappropriate grope."

Kagome blinked. "Really?"

"Kaa, of course. I'd chop off 'is hand. Now come on." Sairex smirked and hopped out before casually walking towards the big double doors.

Kagome was waiting for things to go wrong from the start. She was surprised when no one looked at them twice. The first and only odd looks they really got was when Sairex stopped at the main desk and locked his gleaming yellow eyes on the nurses. She gasped slightly before relaxing, her stare becoming somewhat vacant. Sairex's voice was soft and soothing.

"Good morning. Ve vere zent by Mercy General to pick up some equipment dat your facility vas loaning to us?"

"I'm sorry, sir, I don't really know anything about it...do you know whom you spoke to?" Distantly, in her mind, the nurse knew something was wrong...but every time her mind tried to focus on the man in front of her, it slid off of him somehow, like oil on water. Even though he was right in front of her, she couldn't recall his face. Something was strange about the way he spoke, too...but she couldn't fathom what it was.

"I can't zay dat I do. I have da papervork for our order, however." Sairex handed over a sheet Kagome had carefully printed up off her computer which even contained a few fake signatures and important names from the hospital staff. The nurse gave it a somewhat dazed look.

"Oh, I see...huh...we don't usually loan out such equipment..."

"Vell, ve are in a bit of a crisis...ve don't have any of dese tings to zpare and have a terminal patient due in dis afternoon. It vas a zet of unique circumstances, I assure you." Sairex was actually surprised at the woman's mild resistance to his quiet suggestion - apparently, humans in this era were much more logical and stubborn than what he was used to. His eyes flashed briefly.

The nurse stood, looking even more dazed than before. "Right...I'll make sure that these things are brought up right away." She wandered off, list in hand.

Sairex heaved a sigh of relief. "Humans have changed along vith all deir new toys...she vas a bit harder to put under dan I figured."

Kagome nodded. "Yeah, things are a lot different these days...although different doesn't always mean better or worse. I miss your time. I... I really am going to go back with you guys to help take care of Sesshoumaru. I can figure this modern stuff out a lot faster than you guys could and it sounds like...time is of the essence."

"Indeed."

Surprisingly, their hospital equipment raid went off without a hitch. After signing a few papers, the three of them casually walked out of the hospital with a rather large quantity of equipment, IV fluids, drugs and medications. On the way back to Kagome's apartment, they stopped at a hardware store and purchased a generator. Neither Miroku nor Sairex really knew what to make of it, but Kagome assured them that it was necessary to make some of the machines they were bringing go.

Instead of going out to eat, they stopped and got some food to bring home. Kagome introduced her friends to the wonder that was 'pizza'. Miroku was a bit more used to her future foods, having had several things to try during the time she had been with them. Sairex treated the meal with much more caution but eventually ate his share as well, finding it to be terribly strange but not bad.

During dinner and for the rest of the evening, Kagome chatted with Miroku and played catch-up. Sairex mostly stood on the balcony, lost in thought and examining the city. // I will speak with the priestess come morning, when Miroku is sleeping. He must not yet know of the other reasons I wanted to come to this future time. Eventually, but not yet. //

Kagome finally announced she was going to head to bed and drug out a sleeping bag, some extra pillows and blankets. Miroku teasingly suggested that he could share her bed and promised to be good, but it earned him a swat from Sairex and a pillow to the face from the girl. Kagome hugged them both before heading to her bed, bidding them a goodnight. The two males changed into some sleeping pants and made ready for bed themselves.

Sairex eyed the couch dubiously as Miroku moved to settle down in the sleeping bag on the floor. "I can't zleep on dat..."

"Hmm? Why not? It will be more comfortable than the floor..."

Sairex smirked. "Not vhen you have vings, it vouldn't be."

Miroku chuckled. "Oh...well, I suppose you're right." He took a seat on the couch and patted next to him. "Will you sit with me for a while?"

Sairex sat down sideways next to him, dangling his wings over the arm of the couch. "Have to zay, dis future furniture is a bit more...cushy...dan vhat ve have back home." He smiled, letting his eyes close and his head hang back.

"Indeed. Things are much different here."

Sairex blinked when he felt fingers trailing up his thigh. He opened his eyes and looked up. "Vhat do you tink you're doing? Behave, you. Ve're guests..."

Miroku nodded casually. "Of course we are. In our own room of sorts, all alone." He shifted forward abruptly and pressed his lips to Sairex's throat. "Mm...I've wanted to taste you all day..."

"Mmmiroku...don't. I'm zure you can behave for...for...nnn...." Sairex's eyelids flickered shut as Miroku abruptly quit teasing and moved in for the kill, one hand gripping the base of a wing and the other sliding down the front of the raven's pants.

Miroku paused in his assault of Sairex's throat a few moments later, his voice a sultry purr. "You'll just have to be quiet is all...after all, you wouldn't want to get caught..."

Sairex attempted to voice another protest, but it ultimately crumbled into a breathy moan. Miroku simply had this ... way... about him that just...undid all his sensibilities and destroyed his ability to think in any capacity. His ability to resist, as well, it would seem. The raven couldn't really recall when he was shifted to the floor or when his clothes vanished - the next thing he was conscious of was trying desperately not to cry out as his monk swallowed his aching arousal and idly worked his fingers into the raven's body. Sairex clamped a hand over his mouth in a desperate effort to stifle the sounds being wrung from him. He had forgotten what he was protesting about or why this shouldn't be happening.

Miroku slid up his lover's body and pried his hand free, silencing his cries with a deep kiss even as he thrust into that beautiful body. Dear Buddha, but he loved the feel of this lithe and slender creature writhing beneath him, the impossibly tight heat of his body around him...and the way he looked in the throes of passion was almost enough to do him in by itself.

It took every ounce of Sairex's tattered willpower not to scream when he was thrown into silvery oblivion, his orgasm driving the last vestiges of coherent thought from every corner of his mind. Miroku followed him a split second later and simply collapsed.

It was some time before either of them had the strength to move. Miroku propped himself up on his elbows before leaning down to kiss his raven thoroughly. When he finally let Sairex come up for air, he casually glanced towards the hallway. His gaze locked immediately with a pair of almost comically large brown eyes peering out of an opened bedroom door at them. He flashed Kagome a huge, rather wicked grin and a wink. He saw her jaw drop and barely bit back a chuckle as he leaned back in to give his raven another thorough kiss and a snuggle.

// Well, if they insist on accusing me of depravity... I may as well reap the benefits. //


	74. Chapter 73

Pride (In the Name of Love) 73 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - New sidestory, "Only To Be With You" was posted yesterday afternoon at all my usual sites, you can find the link under my profile. I'm on somethin' of a writing roll. Kinda going back and doing backstories for various events and characters to further illustrate how it all ties together in my main fic here. Hope you all enjoy.

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Just before dawn, Sairex climbed to his feet. He smiled inwardly to himself and closed his eyes. It was a sad smile, a private one he indulged in only when he knew no one would see. No, it wasn't that he actually hated the break of dawn and the sun early in the morning despite is frequent complaints...rather, it brought back too many memories. Memories of the few peaceful times of his youth, memories of a certain summer where the sunrise signaled his need to hurriedly sneak back to his own room before he was caught...and the Black Circle had no sun. It had always seemed painfully symbolic to him, in retrospect...he had left behind the brightest lights of his life, physically and emotionally.

The raven turned his gaze to Miroku. He watched him sleep affectionately for a long moment. He really was incredible, for a human, but Sairex could feel the despair roiling just under the surface ever since his curse had returned. Miroku continued to smile for everyone, but the raven knew it was not a smile that reached the monk's own heart.

Slowly, Sairex reached out one taloned hand and rested it on Miroku's head, murmuring a soft chant. Miroku sighed softly and slid deeper into sleep. The raven stood, content that his lover would not wake before he was ready for him to now.

After dressing and tending to his hair and wings, making sure he was once more in pristine condition, Sairex went to Kagome's room and knocked lightly on the door. "Lady Priestess...? I am zorry to vake you dis early, but I need to talk to you in private."

A sleepy Kagome eventually fumbled the door open, although she turned bright red and couldn't look directly at Sairex for no reason that he could fathom. "Er..." She yawned. "Mrrph. What do you need?"

"It has much to do vith da reason I chose to come personally instead of letting Miroku handle tings on his own. Please, come zit down."

"We'll wake Miroku up. He's a pretty light sleeper."

"No. He vill remain asleep. I made zure of dat."

Kagome nodded sleepily and trudged out to settle down on a chair, studiously not looking directly at Miroku either. She had relaxed a bit - she realized Sairex knew ABSOLUTELY nothing about his lecherous monk's devious little wink the night before... // Damn it, Miroku did that on PURPOSE... //

That didn't mean she was going to be able to look at him for a while without blushing. Especially once he woke up.

"You are familiar vith da curse he now bears, yes?"

Kagome nodded. "Yeah...he had it almost the whole time I was originally over there. He always acted like it was never a big deal and just kept smiling and being cheerful and...well. Being Miroku."

Sairex nodded, his expression taking on a hard, grim quality. It was a darkly calculating look, one that more than a few enemies had seen as Sairex had evaluated them before his attack. "I vill not ztand for it. But dat is only one part of it. Miroku is mortal. If he lives a hundred years, it vill ztill only be a mere fraction of da life I have already lived, vill continue to live."

The woman blinked, a slight frown twitching her lips. "Well, like you said...he's mortal. We all age and die."

Sairex was silent for a long time before speaking. "All tings exist vithin time. It is because of dis dat mortals age and die, dat da mightiest of buildings crumbles to dust and da most powerful of creatures returns to earth. He who controls time has da vorld in his hands. But vhat if dere vas a vay to...remove one...from da timeztream?"

Kagome's eyes widened. The mere concept was crazy. Remove Miroku from the timestream? "You...mean...make him immortal?"

"I intend to prevent him from aging and dying, yes. Immortality of a zort, I zuppose. It vill make him no less immune to death from outzide influences...but he vill live until he is killed."

"You...you can do that?" Kagome didn't know whether to be fascinated or horrified.

"Da alternative is to find a vay to make him into a demon himzelf, and I think he'd be less amenable to dat. For all his zeemingly impure actions...he is a monk at heart. He truly is a holy creature, and a powerful one at dat."

"Do you think Miroku will just let you do this to him?"

Sairex's expression clouded further. "He better. I am as yet less zure of how to cope vith his vind tunnel. I need to find out more about it before I can figure a vay to close it zhort of killing dis Naraku."

"Why wouldn't you want to kill Naraku?"

"I never zaid dat...I just do not like taking unnecessary risks. I vould rather find another vay if Naraku does not present himzelf vithin da time ve have."

"Oh...I see. So...erm...what's all this got to do with me?"

"I need zometing from you, Lady Priestess. A vial of holy vater and a blessing."

Kagome blinked. "Er...are you sure you need me for this?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

Sairex grinned faintly. "You are curious and ask da right questions. It is no vonder you vere a good priestess. Vhy? I do not tink I vould ever find a priestess near your power elsevhere in dis vorld, and I need a truly powerful blessing...one of power dat exists outzide of time."

"Eh? But..."

"You vere born da reincarnation of a priestess dat lived hundreds of years ago. However, da power changed zubtly vith you, as it vould have to do...da zoul is now yours. But noting can exist in two places at once unless it exists outzide of time itzelf. Zhould I bring back vith me tings blessed vith your power...it vill be in defiance to da timeztream as dis power exists vithin da past already."

"Er...then why didn't I have any trouble?"

"It is not zometing you vould notice. You vere alvays a mere ztep from creating a paradox, and tings you did changed da future of da vorld."

"I didn't do that much..."

"Lady Priestess...I do not know vhat you know about me. But I am a zeer. In a limited vay, I can zee vhat paths da future might take."

"You can see the future?!" Kagome was shocked and terribly intrigued all at the same time. Sairex held up a hand and shook his head to try to dim her enthusiasm a bit.

"It is...not dat zimple. Da future is not fixed...it is not zet in ztone. Every ting you do has zeveral potential outcomes. Each of dose outcomes has zeveral potential outcomes...and zo on. Every choice you make, no matter how minor it may zeem, changes your course, eliminates other possible courses. Zo in a limited vay, I could tell you vhat could happen...but cannot ever tell you vith certainty vhat VILL happen. Admittedly, I could guide you to a point in a vague direction in an effort to affect a certain outcome...dat is vhat zeeing and prophecy is all about. But I cannot guarantee tings. Da future is written by da actions of da present and past, it is not already defined."

Kagome nodded slowly. "I see. And what is it you have seen for Miroku?"

Sairex's expression turned grim and he set his lip. "Countless vays for him to die...and zoon. I have not yet found a vay to make him live. And dat is zometing I vill not accept."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku growled in frustration. "You are destroying opportunities with your paranoia about keeping me here. Your raven holds my heart and I cannot defy her, much as I would love to kill her and take it. I am fully reborn and in full possession of my abilities."

Jormandar eyed him skeptically.

"Make no mistake, I do not do this solely to please you. I call no one master. However, I have my own vengeance to wreak on Inuyasha and his family. I can tell you that Sesshoumaru will be trouble if he survives...but from what I know of his father... we are wasting an opportunity."

"Very well, Naraku. I will let you go for a short while."

"I need not go myself. I merely wish to send a demon puppet of my own."

"As you will, then."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga was snapped out of his partial slumber when he sensed a presence in his room. He immediately glared around the room until he found what had dared disturb him - it was a humanoid figure in a white baboon pelt.

"Good morning, Inu no Taisho..."

"Who are you and what the hell are you doing in my room?" Toga growled. Oh, he ached to draw Sounga...but he did not. The hell-sword was very strong and Toga knew himself well enough to admit that his willpower was not what it should be right now. There was the chance that the sword would overpower him in his mentally weakened state and...well, that just wouldn't be good for anyone. "Get out..." he snarled dangerously.

"How rude. And here I come with an offer you are really in no position to refuse..."

Toga growled but said nothing. Naraku was on edge - he could tell the dangerous inu patriarch was a split second from destroying his puppet and not hearing a thing he had to say. He was disheveled, his eyes were red-rimmed and swollen...he looked exhausted and...crazed. Dangerous.

"I have come to offer you Sesshoumaru's life."

Toga was across the room before Naraku could blink, his fingers clenched in the thick white pelt at Naraku's throat.

"The reason he dies is that his spirit is separate from his body because his body is not healing. Ultimately, it is a vicious circle. Without his soul his body cannot heal, and without healing his soul cannot enter his body. I know a way to break that cycle..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru snarled in rage. How DARE that treacherous, slimy beast play on his father's pain like this?! And worse, Sesshoumaru saw the doubt that flickered in his sire's eyes. His own eyes widened in horror as Naraku made clear his price.

"You will give yourself over to me and mine, willingly submit to our captivity and any measures we deem fit to assure your future captivity and cooperation. In return...your precious little puppy shall live. You for your son. What do you think?"

Toga never got the chance to reply. Sesshoumaru simply couldn't allow this to happen. // No, my Lord Father... for love of me, you would give yourself when I am done in anyways. Naraku makes no benevolent deals. For love of you, I will NOT allow this to occur. Even if it means they find a way to make it so I cannot see you anymore until I succumb to this spell... I will not let this happen. //

Sesshoumaru poured everything he had into concentrating, praying to gods he knew would never hear him that this would work. With a defiant roar he lashed out at the demon puppet.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Before Toga could begin to accept Naraku's order, the demon puppet was slit in half by a blazing lash of light. It seemed to originate from nowhere. And yet...oh, only one being he knew used their youki like that...

"My Sesshoumaru...?" Toga whispered, looking from dissipating baboon pelt to his son's still form. // What is going on here...? //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"My Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru sighed, his attempt to reach out and touch his sire ending in the same failure as it always had. "I am here...please don't do anything stupid for my sake, I could never bear it...I will find a way to return to you. I swear it."

Toga turned unexpectedly and walked right through Sesshoumaru's ghostly form. For a moment, both of them felt...SOMETHING... and froze. Toga shook his head slightly and returned to his bed after changing the damp cloth on Sesshoumaru's forehead. The fever had not abated.

Sesshoumaru swallowed thickly and clung to that brief instant of contact. // I swear it. I will find a way to come back to you... //


	75. Chapter 74

Pride (In the Name of Love) 74 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - For some reason, I had a terrible time focusing this morning and this chapter just didn't want to go. Ah, well. It happens once in a while.

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Inuyasha squinted at the massive pile of equipment sitting next to the well. He was rather surprised - for it to be here, Kagome had to have been on their side of the well. A moment later he caught her scent, and then another piece of equipment was hoisted over the edge, followed by the very priestess in question. "Kagome? You're here?"

The woman grinned slightly. "Well...I figured no one else would know what to do with half of this stuff and it'd take too long to explain, so I'm going to stick around for a bit."

Inuyasha grinned and gave her a quick hug. His expression darkened a bit after a moment. "Well, just be careful...my father is...I don't know if he'll like the thought of this stuff being near Sessh right now. It smells funny, looks weird..."

"And you're going to help me to convince him to stay back and let me poke Sesshoumaru full of tubes and needles for his own good."

Inuyasha swallowed thickly. "Yeah...he was goin' to kill Sairex just for being in the same room...and I'm pretty sure he doesn't trust me at all right now. Even if he didn't flat out say it I'm pretty sure he thinks it was me that hurt my brother so bad."

"Why would he think that?" Kagome asked with a blink.

"Because it REALLY looked that way...I can't blame him for thinking it. And it was a wind scar that ripped him up...so I don't blame him, but that doesn't mean I want to be near him. Miroku saved my ass last time but..."

"You're welcome," came Miroku's voice from the well as he crawled over the side. Sairex hopped up a moment later. The two of them had been busy securing some ropes around the generator so they could haul it up. They hadn't expected Inuyasha to be right there or they wouldn't have bothered.

"Hey, guys. What IS all this shit for?" Inuyasha poked curiously at a vital sign monitor.

"In my time, we can keep people alive solely on the merit of machines and artificial means. I'm not a doctor, but...I think with the help of this we might be able to keep Sesshoumaru alive enough for his demon rejuvenation to kick back in and heal him."

"If you say so...this is going to be a bitch to haul back to the castle..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex heaved a heavy sigh. "I don't know vhy you are making ME be da one to talk to him..."

"Because he likes you and you can survive a hit?" Miroku asked cheerily.

"Hurry up, Sairex...the longer we wait, the more time Sesshoumaru loses," Kagome scolded. "Toga will understand."

Sairex sighed and rapped sharply on the door. "Toga? May I come in? It is urgent. Ve think ve can help Zezzhoumaru."

There was silence from the room for a long moment before Toga's reluctant growl answered. "Enter."

Sairex opened the door and walked in, motioning for the others to hold off for a moment. "Toga...Miroku and I have gone to da future, to the Priestess Kagome's time. Vhile ve vere dere, ve got zome... tings. Dese tings are ztrange looking, but zhe zays dey can keep Zezzhoumaru alive until he can heal on his own. Medicines and machines...vill you let dem come in and try to help?"

Toga growled softly, his protective hackles rising. "These things...will work?"

"Kaa, I vould tink zo, but I know noting of dem. Dat is vhy da priestess herzelf came vith us."

"...Fine. Bring them in." Toga very reluctantly got to his feet, although he didn't stray out of touching distance of Sesshoumaru. Sairex poked his head out the door and bid the others to come in.

Kagome, to her credit, kept her reaction in check. Although most of Sesshoumaru was covered with bandages, it was obvious that he was missing large chunks of his body and was badly burned. His breathing had a liquid, rattling sound to it and his skin was flushed. She set the boys to bringing in all the equipment. Toga eyed it suspiciously, as if expecting some of it to attack.

Kagome squared herself up in front of him. "I'm going to tell you now that some of the things I'm going to have to do are going to look like I'm trying to torture him, but that isn't the case. I have to run several needles. Some will be for some IV fluids so he doesn't die of dehydration. And I'll need to put a tube down his throat so we can get some food in him. I also brought some medications to try to help fight fever and infection. There are also monitors to make sure his vital signs are normal, as well as some other things like oxygen and such. The more strain I can take off his body, the better his chance of healing."

Toga nodded stiffly, although it was clear from his posture that he wasn't too thrilled about it.

"I will, of course, need your help to care for him," Kagome said. Toga suddenly seemed much more intrigued - the thought that he could, perhaps, do something to help Sesshoumaru was one that pleased him. He had felt horribly useless and pained doing what amounted to laying there and watching his pup die.

"You shall...have to explain what these things are to me..." he said slowly as he eyed the equipment that had been drug into his room. His gaze suddenly snapped almost audibly across the room. "Inuyasha. You will come with me."

Inuyasha blinked and then slowly set down the machine he had been carrying. "Yeah, ok."

Toga led him out of the room onto his personal balcony and shut the door. When he turned to look at his younger pup, Inuyasha fought back the urge to gulp. "Tell me you did not do this to my Sesshoumaru, pup, or I will kill you where you stand."

"You really think I would do that to him?"

"You cut off his arm before, have used my fang on him before innumerable times..."

"He put his fucking hand through my chest but that doesn't matter?!"

"I did not say that. Sesshoumaru was in the wrong several times in your tumultuous relationship. However, the two of you seemed to have made up and been getting along fairly well."

"We were. We were just walkin' down the hall and ... hell, teasing each other for the most part. All in good fun. He walked into the room, froze, and it was like...he abruptly returned to complete-asshole mode, as bad as he was at his worst. He chased me down, took out a wall. We get outside, he grabbed Tetsusaiga - "

"The barrier I placed on my blade was to make sure he would not try to wield it."

"Yeah, well, ya can't really tell cause he got really fucked up, but the sword burned his hand. Really bad. But he ignored it, threw a Wind Scar, dropped the Tetsusaiga at my feet and teleported himself into the middle of the blast."

Toga was silent for a moment. "Hm. Sesshoumaru was suicidal..." Toga paused, the admission paining him even as he said it. The word was hard to get out. "...But I don't think he would have chosen that as his method. He doesn't feel the need for complex games and tricks, and I don't think he would have framed you of his own accord. That means...we were attacked. Again. DAMN it..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"So you failed."

Naraku let out a rather annoyed huff. "No, I did not FAIL. Your captive is simply beginning to get a bit too restless and is displaying a remarkable ability to do things in a place where he should not be able to do anything."

"This is not my doing."

Karalichala glared at Naraku. "It is not a place dat vas designed for long-term captivity. Generally a zpirit-cage zuch as dat one vill only be needed a zhort while. Den da zhadow-beast vill take da zoul vhen da body dies. Apparently, zomeone failed to deliver much of a killing blow." Here, a pair of pale yellow eyes flicked accusingly to Jormandar. The puppetmaster glared back at her for a moment, and Naraku chuckled.

"Look at us, arguing amongst ourselves. That seems a grand way to defeat our enemies."

"Zilence, Naraku. Zoon I vill be rid of da burden of carrying dis child and den I vill be able to be of more assistance."

"Indeed. Mm, I wonder if the monk has realized the truth of his curse yet..." A wicked smile curved Naraku's lips. "If he hasn't, he shall soon enough."

"Is it not the same curse you placed on his family long ago?" Jormandar asked.

"Same curse, but it works faster. The void will consume him in a less than a year if he does not use it at all...but he WILL use it. He always tried to use it to his advantage against me. This time, to do so will be the death of him."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex set down the things he had gotten from Kagome on his desk. He then rummaged around through his things, aware of Miroku's curious look.

"What are those things for, and why did you handle that pendant like it could explode at any time?"

"Kaa. It's blessed by your priestess friend." Sairex finally found what he was looking for. "And I'm a demon."

"I see. What...are you going to do with that?"

Sairex smiled ever so slightly. "Defy da vill of da gods and existence itzelf."

Miroku frowned slightly and sat down on the edge of the bed. "In what fashion?"

The raven debated before answering. "I intend to remove you from da timeztream. Den, you vill not age and vill not die. I am...unvilling to give you up to zuch tings. Although perhaps I zhould be focusing on your vind tunnel first."

"Remove me...from the timestream? You know how to do something like that?"

Sairex scowled slightly. "No, but I intend to find a vay."

Miroku sat back, a slight frown drifting across his face. The thought of living forever wasn't one that he had ever dwelled on. He had accepted that his demon friends would but never really given it much thought of his own. Nor, he realized, had he ever given the thought of growing to old age consideration either. He had simply always known he would die a young man. Even when he had been freed from his wind tunnel, it really hadn't occurred to him that things would be different.

"I am human, Sairex...I am not meant to live forever."

Sairex's spine stiffened and he slowly turned to look at Miroku. He said nothing.

Miroku sighed. "It is tempting, though. I have a stipulation, however."

"Vhat?"

"I will...if you find a way to do this that is...allow you to remove me from the timestream and such. But only if you promise me that you can drop me back in it if ever I tell you I wish it, and that you will not argue with me. Humans are not meant to live forever and there may be reasons."

Sairex nodded after a moment. "Very vell. I can agree to dat. Now...about dis vind tunnel of yours. Da easiest vay vill of course be to kill dis Naraku character, but if he remains hidden ve may run out of time. Ve need to find another way."

"Well, we have a while at least. I lived with this thing all my life, save for the last few years. I know about how much it grows each year."

Sairex frowned, fiddling with something on his desk. Miroku caught the look and arched an eyebrow. "What?"

"You don't....you don't have years, Miroku."

Miroku felt as if someone had poured a bucket of ice water down his spine. "What do you mean?"

"You know I'm a zeer...and I've been trying to figure out vhat to do in regards to you. But right now, if ve leave it alone... you don't have years." The raven's voice was deeply pained and it was a real feat for him to keep it from quivering.

Miroku hated to ask, but he needed to know. "How long do we have, then?..."

Sairex fidgeted, not wanting to answer.

"Sairex..."

"The longest timeframe I vas able to zee gave you not quite two cycles of da moon."

Miroku was glad he was sitting down already; otherwise, he feared, he would have surely fallen. Less than two months left to live before being consumed by his wind tunnel, before the nightmare that had plagued him for so long came to pass? "I...think I need to lie down. I suddenly do not feel very well."


	76. Chapter 75

Pride (In the Name of Love) 75 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - No news. Although I do have a response to Ardy1 from Mediaminer. I appreciate your review and do not quite consider it a flame, as it was well thought out and you made your points well. I will contest some of them - especially in regards to Sairex. Sairex could NOT have been female and had things work out as well - there are vital reasons he had to be a he. His relationship with Miroku was not gratuitous catering to yaoiness as it happened under rather unique circumstances, considering they had a very intimate bonding experience while sharing a body.

I'll concede Inuyasha and Kouga being gratuitous, even if I can logically see reasons for it to occur. That was just a 'might as well' for me. There aren't a lot of major female characters in IY and I wanted both of them to be running about. Yes, I could have written one of them with Kagome but it was important that she was in her own time for...various things. Neither Inuyasha nor Kouga would work well with Sango. The only other female tangled up with the lot of them is Rin, and I still have plans for her.

As for Toga and Sesshy...I understand your argument about it being a different level of incest and an abuse of power. I like to think that Toga was extremely careful to make sure he WASNT doing anything that was unwanted and Sesshoumaru WAS conscious enough, despite his lofty opinion of his father, to fully understand the implications of things before they began. That doesn't make it any less taboo, but...I don't know. I rather enjoy it and think it works for my purposes.

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Several largely uneventful days passed. Inuyasha had spent a lot of time showing off the castle and things to her, proud of his new home and status even if he would never have admitted it. For him, at least, it was a return of something like normalcy. He realized he had dearly missed his friend's presence after she had returned home.

Kagome had been stricken at the story of what had happened to Shippo. Sairex - in one of the very brief times they saw the raven that week - assured them he had things in the works to fix him, it just took time to make things and he wasn't sure what he needed to make, exactly, so there was a lot of trial and error.

Neither of them saw Miroku at all. In fact, no one short of Sairex did. It was if the monk had pulled some sort of vanishing act. Inuyasha had demanded of the raven to know what was going on, but Sairex's look had been deeply pained and he had finally said that it was Miroku's place to tell them and not his. In light of his expression, Inuyasha let it be. Sairex returned to his room, where he had been working slavishly on researching all he could find in relation to curses and the removal thereof.

Toga had taken over as much of Sesshoumaru's care as he could figure out and kept prodding Kagome to show him more. Even though it wasn't easy for her to explain all the futuristic equipment she'd brought back - especially since she had only the barest knowledge of it herself - she had made the effort. She knew he was only trying to help and thought his devotion to his puppy was sweet.

Toga's 'help' had produced some problems, however. There had been the problem with feeding Sesshoumaru. Toga would not allow her to feed him any of the things she'd brought - they smelled rather awful and a quick taste had proven his sense of smell was dead on. Kagome had tried to explain that it was about the nutritional content and since it was going via a tube straight to his stomach it wouldn't be tasted anyway, but Toga would have none of it. He had compromised when she brought a 'blender' from her house. While it looked absolutely dreadful, Toga decided liquefying some good wholesome meat and blood for his pup was a far better choice. Kagome ultimately agreed - he was probably right. Good solid demon food would do more for him than human food.

The medication - which Kagome would NOT let Toga try despite how growly he got at being denied the ability to test it to protect his Sesshoumaru - also seemed to take effect. Things had held steady for a couple of days, which was an improvement in and of itself instead of Sesshoumaru's slow decline. Then his healing had slowly begun to kick back in. Now, several days later, Sesshoumaru was more or less whole. Kagome had decided he was healed enough that he didn't need the oxygen and had unhooked it.

Toga was ecstatic to see his pup recovering - albeit slowly. His deep and rather frightening depression lifted, and he actually took to making a few trips around his castle again, even if they WERE short and saw him hastening to return to Sesshoumaru's side. He made his gratitude to the miko for these strange, if noisy and somewhat terrifying, machines and remedies well known. Kagome had blushed and tried to wave it away, but Toga would have none of it. He was disappointed she wouldn't live with them in the castle or accept her own land nearby to do with as she wished, but he reluctantly accepted her need to go back home.

The morning came after about ten days of tending when Kagome and Toga decided Sesshoumaru was back in one piece. The fluids and feeding tube had to stay due to the fact he had yet to awaken from his coma, but his body was once again whole. His fever had vanished, his breathing was even, and his wounds had mostly closed up. He was still injured and shouldn't be moved, but he no longer was in need of life support.

The big question was, however....when would Sesshoumaru wake up ? Kagome had not really wanted to mention the fact that some coma patients never DID come out of it and there was no way she or Toga could force it. All they could do was wait.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was glad to see the machines leave. They had really rather creeped him out, in all honesty, because he could not explain them. They did seem to work, however, and he smugly watched as his body slowly turned from it's collision course with doom and began to repair.

Karalichala was agitated and angry. Her hold on Sesshoumaru's soul was growing severely strained. The more his body repaired, the more it tried to draw him back. Sesshoumaru had been looking at her suspiciously of late when she would appear, and she didn't know what he was planning. Her visits were about more than taunting him of course, she had to maintain her spell and it was easier to refresh the strength of her binding in person.

Her own energies were severely taxed as it was, however, due to her pregnancy. Her spells had sped things up tremendously, but it meant that the babe was taking its toll on her energy at a horribly accelerated rate and giving her no chance to recover. She was feverish and strained...and that was probably why Sesshoumaru caught her so off guard.

Sesshoumaru had first felt it that morning...a distant pulse, a beat in his chest. No...it wasn't in his soul...it was in his body! He tentatively felt the link, and was thrilled to find it held. It was time to take the risk.

Karalichala didn't even bother taunting him. She was pale and sweating, her cheeks flushed and her eyes distant as she went through the motions of sustaining a spell that she barely could manage. She didn't understand when Sesshoumaru suddenly squared his shoulders and gave her a smirk...and then vanished. "V...vhat?..."

The impact as he hit her from behind jarred the breath from her. She had no chance to regain it, however, as his arm latched around her throat, choking her. She felt her consciousness slipping as she frantically clawed at Sesshoumaru's arm. Sesshoumaru paid her no heed, just mentally reached for the connection he had felt earlier, grimly determined.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga was shocked enough when Sesshoumaru's eyes slowly flickered open. He almost tripped over several things in his haste to practically pounce on Sesshoumaru. His pup, however, was trying to weakly tell him something, and it wasn't hard to figure out what.

Laying unconscious on the ground was Karalichala. Sesshoumaru had brought her with him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was sure something had went wrong when everything went dark and he felt all his strength evaporate. But he felt the steady thud of his heart, felt his chest rising and falling...felt solid things all around him. He hadn't expected that he would be so weak when he returned, but he supposed it was only to be expected. It was a supreme effort to open his eyes, and it took them a moment to focus.

He saw his father leap up and scramble towards him. He wanted to tell him that he had to deal with the raven demoness - he had refused to let her go as he yanked himself back into the real world and had felt her be forced to come with him. He was far too weak to do something like speak, however, even if he didn't have a tube down his throat.

Toga noticed the raven demoness' presence and paused, eyeing her in surprise for a long moment. His gaze flicked back to Sesshoumaru. Toga decided he had never seen a sight half as beautiful as those golden eyes looking back at him, even half-lidded and tired. He took a knee next to the bed, his hands slowly closing over one of Sesshoumaru's. He felt tears of relief slipping from his eyes but he didn't bother to hide them. "My Sesshoumaru...oh, gods..."

Sesshoumaru smiled at him with his eyes before exhaustion reclaimed him and he fell into sleep. A normal sleep, not the comatose slumber he had succumbed to previously.

Toga didn't move from his position for a long time, silently offering his thanks to all the powers that be before his gaze shifted to the room's other occupant. After a moment's consideration, he rang for a servant and then sent the servant to get Sairex.

Sairex was clearly exhausted himself, but his sleepy expression shifted through an incredible spectrum of shock, hatred, confusion, and many more all in the span of a few seconds as his eyes stayed locked on Karalichala. "How?..."

"My Sesshoumaru brought her back with him."

"He voke up? Oh, tank da gods. I vas...I didn't tink he vould."

"Neither did I. I did not want to admit it, but I knew he was fading. I owe the priestess much for bringing these things...and you and your monk for thinking of it."

Sairex's expression clouded a bit at the mention of Miroku and Toga didn't miss it.

"You know, Sairex, even though I've been in here I've heard things. What is going on with you and Miroku?"

"I....I really zhould be taking care of her right now..." Sairex knelt next to Karalichala, looking her over slowly. "Mm. It looks as if zhe zhould have da child very zoon."

"Sairex."

"Mm?"

"Do not dodge my questions."

The raven sighed. "If I don't find a vay to get rid of it, and zoon, he vill die."

"I understand that...we knew this. Something changed, however, because you're both acting strangely."

"Ve assumed he had at least a couple years. Dat is no longer da case."

"How long?" Toga frowned.

"A month and a half, at da most. Possibly less. That was da uppermost limit of vhat I could zee for him."

"Damn...oh, Sairex, I'm so sorry..."

"Hn...he's not dead yet. Zave your zorries for later. I vill...take care of dis."

"Oh, allow me. Would you like her in a dungeon or elsewhere?"

"In one of da healer's chambers, actually...but vell tied. I do not vish her to escape, but I do intend to keep my child and it vould not do to risk it."

"Fair enough." Toga bent down and scooped Karalichala up. "Sairex...get some rest. You look exhausted. Before you protest, let me remind you...your mind is quite sharp but not if you're tired. You will ultimately get more done if you step back and rest a bit rather than try to force something out."

"Mrr...I know. Tank you, Toga. You yourzelf have zome tings to do...Inuyazha has been looking over tings in your...ahem...incapacitation of late."

Toga looked vaguely guilty for a moment. "Oh. I see." His look turned contemplative and slightly dark. "Do you think it was him?"

"Vhat, dat attacked Zezzhoumaru? No. I believe it is as he zaid. Jormandar attacked you vith a zpell meant for Zezzhoumaru a vhile back. It vas ztupid of me not to tink to check for leftover traces of it."

"You can't think of everything. Now go rest. I will take care of this." Here Toga jerked a thumb in the direction of Karalichala.

Sairex nodded and sketched a quick bow. "Of course. Inuyazha can fill you in on vhat has occurred of late. Don't be too hard on da boy..."

"I do not intend to if his innocence is as you say. I know that most of his past trouble with Sesshoumaru was largely Sesshoumaru's doing. I love my eldest, but that does not mean I am blinded to his nature. Away with you, bird!"

Sairex smiled slightly. "Alright, Alright, I'm going...get zome rest yourzelf. You look like hell."

"Always with the flattery..." Toga chuckled and then headed off to drop off his newly acquired prisoner.


	77. Chapter 76

Pride (In the Name of Love) 76 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - To answer a question - no, Toga is not the sort of parent to only stand behind his eldest. Yes, Sesshy and him have a special relationship and not just because of the intimacy that has occurred between them of late. But this is the same guy that died for the life of his newborn child. Would he have REALLY killed Inuyasha? If he thought his assault on Sesshoumaru was deliberate, perhaps...but probably not. Sairex was mostly just making sure that things weren't going to go further down the drain. Toga loves both of his boys dearly, and it was more his pain at thinking that they would hurt each other so much talking than any real intention to rip up Inuyasha. Things are gonna be hashed out between them soon anyways.

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Inuyasha looked up from his lunch as the door swung open. He blinked several times in surprise as Toga entered and hurried to finish chewing so he could get rid of his mouthful of food.

"Oh...hi there!" Kagome greeted him cheerily. Toga gave her a warm smile of gratitude

"Greetings, Lady Priestess...Inuyasha. Sesshoumaru woke up."

Kagome and Inuyasha gasped, and Inuyasha was on his feet a split second later. Toga held up a hand to slow him down. "He is sleeping. Allow him this rest. I have come to speak with you anyhow, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha reluctantly sat back down. He was surprised when Toga took a knee in front of him, his head bowed.

"Forgive me, my son, for doubting you...and for my treatment of you."

Inuyasha squirmed a bit, hating to be put on the spot like this. "Its alright, don't worry about it. I can understand how ya'd think I was the one that did it, considering."

"No, it is NOT alright. I should have been more willing to listen to you instead of letting my emotions get the better of me."

"Now I see where Sessh gets THAT from..."

Toga snorted and stood. "Heh...the difference is I do not DENY my emotions, I simply do not believe I should let them get entirely out of control. I also want to thank you for taking care of things while I was... well. Letting my emotions get entirely out of control."

"Eh, believe me, its ok. Sesshoumaru was dying. I would have been more surprised if you WEREN'T overwhelmed with grief, all things considered."

Toga's cheeks flushed every so slightly and Kagome quirked an eyebrow. She really would have to ask Inuyasha later about the exact nature of his relationship with Sesshoumaru...although it COULDN'T be anything like THAT...he was his father, after all...right?...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Karalichala bore the labor pains with a great deal of annoyance - this was far from her first child and she was glad this damnable pregnancy would be over with. She was even further agitated by the fact that she was strapped down tightly to the bed in which she lay...and she could not deny the cold fear that was slinking along her spine and worming into her belly.

It was only a short while before she gave birth. She heard the baby cry out as the healer did his job, but she never actually got to lay eyes on the baby. The healer walked out to the hallway and stopped dead in his tracks. He held a brief conversation with someone before continuing on his journey. The raven demoness bit back a tired curse - she had desperately wanted to know if the baby was male or female so she could figure out what to do with it when she escaped.

She was snapped out of a light doze when she felt a presence in her room. Her eyes jerked open at the sound of a voice speaking in her native tongue...something she hadn't heard for well over a thousand years. "Greetings. It seems you have finally awaken."

Kara's eyes locked on Sairex, who was sitting in the chair next to her bed. "You!"

"Yes, me. Who did you expect?"

"Where is my baby?"

"MY baby is elsewhere, and you will never lay eyes on it. In fact, the last living creature you will see is me."

"Hah. You will not kill me, Kinslayer."

One of Sairex's delicate eyebrows arched and he gave her a look that could have frozen the sun. "Oh yes, I will. Even if I did not have reason to kill you for personal revenge, the simple fact that you are pure wickedry borne of my clan would be enough."

"I can make you a deal in exchange for my life that your inu lord would be VERY displeased if you were to ignore it..."

"I do not care what the Inu no Taisho thinks on this matter nor what you can offer him. Your life is mine and he will not be able to stop me, even if he were so inclined. I'm sure there will be a bit of displeasure that I did not get more information from you first, but I will cope with it. You have performed more wicked deeds than I could ever count, you RAPED me, you killed my mate, and you intended to kill my child. Your life belongs to me, and I will take it."

"Do you have any idea who I am?!"

"No. I can't say I much care, but go ahead regardless. Tell me."

"I am Karalichala Su'Nak'Ti. I was to be your second mate, but I fell ill and lost the position at the last moment."

"Damn. The trouble I could have saved myself if I had been able to kill you that long ago... Really, Karalichala. You think that your former standing, no matter whom your parents were or what bloodline you carry will have ANY bearing whatsoever?"

"I can prevent the war that is going to strike this place, Sairexannaras."

"I do not care."

"You think I am helpless? My family were some of the strongest necromancers in the clan, and I am more than they ever were! Perish, fool!"

Sairex arched an eyebrow as a dark portal suddenly opened and a rather surprised and dazed Naraku was dropped roughly in front of him. The kumo was gripping his chest and his eyes were wide, his breath coming in short gasps.

"Kill him, Naraku, and you vill have your freedom. Deny me and I crush your heart!"

Sairex blinked a few moments before turning to face the kumo. A small smile flitted across his lips. "You know...you are really saving me a lot of time and effort, Karalichala."

Naraku gave the raven demoness a hateful glare, the pain in his chest subsiding enough for him to move. "And you are?" He glanced at Sairex.

Sairex smirked. "Your vorst nightmare, Naraku."

"I do not have nightmares, little bird." Naraku's confident smile wavered a moment later as Sairex's eyes flashed. He suddenly found himself in the middle of a mental battle unlike anything he had ever experienced before. Sairex was tearing into his mind. He found himself losing control of his motor function - in fact, it seemed this creature was...was trying to take it over! Naraku's will was nothing to scoff at, though, and Sairex couldn't quite dominate it.

To his credit, Naraku was no fool, nor was he weak. He lashed out viciously at Sairex, forcing the raven to leap out of the way. Sairex nimbly dodged his blast, bouncing lightly off the wall. However, his concentration was broken and Naraku was not easy to subdue. Naraku wasted no time.

Naraku knew he was unprepared and thus sorely outmatched. He had yet to rest and gather his full energies, to prepare all his usual tricks, to work with his body to make sure his demons were as powerful as they could be and cull the weak ones. He sent another lash Sairex's way even as he dove at Karalichala. The raven demoness shrieked but, caught by surprise and weak as she was in addition to being bound, was unable to stop him from tearing his heart from her grasp.

"I will not battle you this day, raven."

"YOU VILL NOT ESCAPE!" Sairex yelled in sudden, desperate panic. Before he could strike back at Naraku, however, the kumo had vanished in a choking cloud of miasma.

Sairex let out a howl of denial that would have done an inu credit and shot out the window after the retreating cloud, but to no avail. Naraku had escaped. Sairex's grief and rage at having lost his shot at freeing Miroku from certain death overwhelmed him for a moment. He let out an angry hiss as he shot back into the healer's chamber where Karalichala lay. She was laughing.

Sairex slowly lifted his gaze to look at her. His limbs were shaking and his teeth were bared in a rather un-ravenlike snarl. Rage boiled in his intense yellow eyes, and Karalichala knew fear. "R...Release me, fool! You do not want this war! I can...I don't know what Naraku is to you or what he's done, but I can find him again!"

The raven hissed at her in response, stalking over to the side of her bed. She let out a long and loud shriek and thrashed madly against the bonds holding her, but to no avail. His voice was low and deadly. "So you were the one that brought this Naraku back to life as well? You kill my mate twice? Damn you..."

"Death won't stop me! You should know as well as I that we have the knowledge to escape the underworld!"

"You aren't going to the underworld! I'm going to tear you apart!" Sairex snarled and leapt forward before grabbing her by the throat, his other hand making a few quick gestures. A split second later and he blazed into Karalichala's mind and then her soul, gripping both and beginning to pull.

She had never felt anything like it. The sheer magnitude of the pain was more than she could have imagined. Instinctively, she lashed back and was grimly satisfied to know she was hurting him...but it wasn't enough. He seemed to be anticipating her attacks - which really wasn't surprising considering how many other of their clan he'd fought like this. He had to have learned a thing or two. And...well, it was quite difficult for one to concentrate enough to fight back when they had razor-sharp claws digging into their throat even as the life was choked out of them.

Sairex did not release Karalichala until nothing remained but a withered, empty husk.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku landed hard in front of a cave. It would have to serve as shelter...he was tired and his head hurt terribly from his brief battle with the raven. His chest still ached, too, from the death-grip that...that female raven had had on his heart.

Naraku slumped to a sitting position in the back of the cave. It was good that he had escaped that castle. // But...how did I get there? //

Everything seemed so fuzzy in his mind. Sairex had hurt him. Thinking was difficult. Slowly he closed his eyes, deciding a little rest would do him good.

By the time he woke up, he would have forgotten not only where he was or why he was there, but who he was as well.


	78. Chapter 77

Pride (In the Name of Love) 77 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - For those that asked - Sairex's speech was unaccented because he was speaking in his native tongue, which Karalichala of course understood as it is her native tongue as well. It's only when Sairex switches languages that his speech is so inflected.

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Toga made his way down the hall, feeling a bit better after his talk with Inuyasha. Towards the end of his stay, Kagome had been giving him the strangest looks - he supposed he'd find out why soon enough. Before he retired for the evening, he intended to get some more of the strange medicine Kagome had brought for Sesshoumaru. He was mostly healed but Kagome had insisted that he finish the whole bottle. Maybe she was right.

Toga stopped abruptly as his nose picked up a scent. He smelled blood. Familiar blood. Sairex's blood.

Golden eyes widening and hand drifting to the hilt of Sounga, Toga tore down the hallway and skidded to a stop, almost colliding with the raven in question. Sairex was slumped on the floor, wings askew and head bowed. Several deep scratches covered his arms and chest, but none of them were life threatening or even terribly grievous.

"Sairex?" he asked slowly, releasing his grip on Sounga. Sairex's reply was mumbled, his tone oddly thick and cracked.

"Tu savaren...lyainarr toravis..."

Toga frowned slightly. "Sairex, is everything alright? What happened?" He slid a bit closer, wondering if there was some injury on the raven that he couldn't see. Sairex's hair was damp with sweat, but Toga couldn't get a look at his features clearly due to the way his bangs were shielding his face.

"Lyainarr toravis!" Sairex recoiled abruptly, shaking his head. His voice had a somewhat crazed quality to it that Toga didn't like at all. "T...Toga?..."

"What the hell happened?"

"Get avay from me..."

Toga blinked, then frowned. "No. You need to tell me what's going on."

Sairex gripped his own arms tightly, sinking his claws into his flesh. The sharp pain seemed to clear his mind ever so slightly. "Get...avay. I don't vant to hurt you."

Toga realized in horror that the scratches on the raven were all self-inflicted. He finally caught sight of Sairex's eyes and couldn't help but stare. The raven's yellow eyes were wide and staring, the pupils dilated. "You won't hurt me, just tell me what happened. Let me help you." Toga slowly reached for Sairex.

He received a few lightning-fast slashes for his effort before Sairex collapsed to his knees, gripping his head with a low moan of anguish.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Oh, it had been so long since he had taken one of his kin. Sairex groaned at the repeated lances of pain shooting through him. Karalichala had fought back, fought hard and desperately. He had never tried to pull someone as strong as she was, and without making a bit better preparations.

Now the war was in his mind and his sanity was wavering. Always before he had made sure he had some place he could go to ride out the consuming lunacy, some place where he knew no one would be able to hurt him or, more importantly, be hurt by him. He hadn't, in his rage, made any such preparations now.

Everything was twisted, distorted and surreal. His eyes and mind were playing tricks on him. His vision was swimming and he couldn't make sense of most of the things he saw. Dimly he knew this was a result of Karalichala fighting him, trying to take control of his mind from him or rip free. He could allow neither, and the effort of holding her left her free to tear into his brain.

Wild bouts of emotion flared through him, from crazed pleasure to a boiling, bloodthirsty rage that threatened to send him out to tear the castle asunder.

Was it even really a castle? Was it not instead the pits of hell, sucking him in in his vulnerable state?...and could this possibly be Toga? No, this creature was a lie...the words it said swam in nonsensical patterns, its motions concealed hostility. Yes, that was it. It was here to get him while he was weak, trying to trick him with a familiar body. It was a trap!

Sairex lashed out with a shriek of defiance, his wings flaring as he leapt back to be out of range of retaliation. The ground below him spun in a dizzying haze and the torches on the walls burned with the fire of a thousand suns, blinding him, trying to consume him.

The raven felt his back hit the wall. The wall shifted, jelly-like behind him and tried to suck him in, reaching out to grasp at him with thick, slimy tentacles. And the hell-beast was back, jaws opening to consume him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga watched in alarm as Sairex hit his knees. A few moments later, the raven lashed out at him, and only a quick reaction saved Toga from having his throat torn. Sairex leapt backwards and smacked into the wall, shrieking and whirling as if the wall had tried to eat him alive. The raven was shouting something in his native tongue and slashing crazily at something that Toga surely didn't see. He gave a hesitant sniff - he didn't smell anything either.

The inu had seen enough. If this kept up much longer, the raven was likely to hurt himself. Or him, although the latter was less likely considering the crazed and random nature of his attacks. Toga slowly squared off, tensing himself like a coiled spring. The moment he saw his opening, he lunged forward.

Sairex screamed and fought wildly as his wrists were caught. Toga had no worries that the lightweight bird could pull away - even with the force of his wings he was very much overpowered. "Sairex! Please, calm down...what's wrong with you?...It's Toga...Sairex!"

The raven abruptly stilled and slowly turned to look at him. "Toga...?"

"Yes. I am here..." Toga slowly released his almost bruising grip on Sairex's wrists as he saw the raven visibly calming.

"It is really you? I vill not forgive you if you eat me, I vill come back and curse you from da afterlife...trakk'tahnos kabahlla!"

"Easy, easy...it is really me. I swear it. No curses necessary."

"Toga!" The inu blinked as Sairex leaped forward, his arms wrapping around Toga's neck in a tight and almost desperate hug. Toga hesitantly put his arms around the slender bird's waist. Sairex murmured something in his native tongue against his chest. Toga began to get the impression that the raven's episode had not so much ended as switched gears.

Toga let out a surprised yelp and took a half step back, smacking into the wall and not really managing to escape. Sairex's hand had slid down between his legs and taken a firm hold of him. The raven's tone had shifted to one he hadn't heard in more years than he could count, a seductive purr. The inu patriarch decided abruptly it was probably a good thing he couldn't understand a damn word coming out of Sairex's mouth, considering the way it was being said. He scrambled to try and pry the raven off of him without causing him any harm...or his own rather sensitive bits. Preferably before the unexpected little thrill of arousal did any damage - he had always been a physical creature.

"Sairex...stop! What are you doing!? You cannot...what of Miroku? And...oh, unhand me, raven..."

"Miroku?" The raven paused, briefly confused. Toga could tell the name had rung some bells...but apparently they were not bells heard loudly. "Vhy von't you love me...?...I vant you...I've missed you...Take me, please..."

Toga bit back a groan as he was deftly manipulated - Sairex HAD figured out exactly the best ways to caress him and stroke him to maximum effect during their stint as lovers. The scent of his arousal was heady and familiar, and the damnable raven even remembered the best way to gracefully arch his throat in submission...

Toga bit his lip as he shook his head hard to clear it enough to think if only for a moment. He let Sairex go. It was with extreme reluctance that he delivered the sharp blow to the back of the raven's neck. Sairex's eyes went blank as he slid into unconsciousness. Toga caught him before he hit the floor. His expression was guilty and he couldn't help but dart his eyes around to make sure no one had seen what had transpired.

Convinced that he was in the clear, Toga sighed and hefted the raven in his arms, wondering if he should lock him in a dungeon or set him to rest in the healer's chambers. Who knew how sane he would be when he awoke?

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey! You! Stop!" Inuyasha pointed an accusing finger at Miroku, who had just been about to vanish around a corner.

"In...Inuyasha, Kagome...hello."

"What's the big idea? I haven't seen you in a week." The hanyou squinted.

Miroku sighed. "I am...sorry. I have been very busy researching."

"Researching? What the hell do you need to research so much that it consumes your entire damn life?"

The monk frowned a bit and lifted his hand slowly. "The thing that threatens to consume my entire life. If I don't...I...I have to get rid of it soon, Inuyasha. Being torn apart by my own wind tunnel as my father was is not a fate I can bear."

Inuyasha's expression softened some. "Yeah...I hear you."

"Have you seen Sairex? He said he had something to take care of and then he would return. It's been quite a while though."

The hanyou thought for a moment and even gave a few hesitant sniffs. "No. Haven't seen him and it doesn't smell like he's been around for a bit. Although I do smell something that shouldn't be around for a bit..." Inuyasha's gaze darkened. "Seeya around, you guys. I have to take care of this."

Before either Kagome or Miroku could respond, Inuyasha had bounded off down the hallway.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha stopped abruptly when he turned another corner and almost collided with Sesshoumaru. His joy and gratitude at seeing his brother alive and moving around on his own were overshadowed by his worry. "Sessh, what in the fuck are you doing out of bed? You shouldn't be moving yet! Father will kill you!"

"He has not yet retired for the evening."

Inuyasha blinked. "Really? He said he was going to bed a good while ago. Wonder what kept him. Even still, there is no way you should be up. Look at you, you can barely stand! How in the hells did you make it this far?"

Sesshoumaru was leaning heavily on the wall, out of breath and feeling about ready to collapse. He had begun to think his journey was foolish just as Inuyasha had appeared. "I...was looking for you. This Sesshoumaru would speak with you, Inuyasha."

"Really? With me? About what? And couldn't you have just rang for a servant to get me?"

Sesshoumaru mumbled. "This Sesshoumaru is not helpless." Noting Inuyasha's expression and not wanting to hear what he might have to say, Sesshoumaru forged ahead. "I wished to ... apologize. During my possessed state I said things that I...no longer believe with such conviction. And I'm sure I caused you no little trouble with our Lord Father. I am sorry for that."

"Eh, he only wanted to disembowel me is all. No big deal. And you were possessed. There's nothin' for me to forgive and nothin' for you to apologize for. I'm not mad about it. It wasn't your fault."

Sesshoumaru eyed him for a moment before nodding, feeling better and satisfied that this conversation had gone about as well as could be expected. He was not used to apologizing for anything.

Inuyasha smirked and then slid over, idly leaning up and pressing a quick kiss to his brother's lips before Sesshoumaru could react. "Now get your ass back in bed before you fall down. And stay there. You're shaking. You shouldn't be up, and overexerting yourself will just make you sick again."

Sesshoumaru nodded and began making his way back towards his room. He didn't even complain or pull away when Inuyasha moved to help him.


	79. Chapter 78

Pride (In the Name of Love) 78 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Purple is the square root of the apocalypse.

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In the end, Toga elected to bring Sairex to his dungeons and have him locked up securely. The raven may not be physically strong, but he was fast and agile and Toga didn't really want to see him hurt anyone else in his crazed state. He made sure that a bed, chairs, and other minor creature comforts were brought to his cell as well. After all, Sairex was not his prisoner. It was simply a precaution.

After making sure Sairex was tucked in comfortably to his bed - on his side with his wings not crunched up beneath him, Toga remembered that much - the inu patriarch made his way out.

It didn't take Toga long to sniff out Miroku - after all, with the recent exception of Kagome, he was the only human in the castle besides Rin and his scent was easy to pick out. The monk was idly chatting with the priestess in one of the sitting rooms. Both looked up when he entered, somewhat surprised.

"Greetings, my Lord. I rather thought you had retired for the evening," Miroku said with a slight grin. Kagome gave Toga a smile of greeting, but it faltered when she saw the troubled look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

Toga sighed. "Miroku, I would speak with you."

A chill gripped Miroku's heart, but he waved for Kagome to stay seated. "There is nothing you can say to me that she can not hear...what...its Sairex, isn't it? Oh, dear Buddha, what happened?!"

"In all honesty, I can't say. He seems to have taken leave of his senses. He was lucid and coherent for only a few moments. He assaulted me...in addition to the walls, the air..." Toga winced. "I was forced to render him unconscious and lock him up, although I wouldn't imagine he'll be sleeping long."

Miroku looked absolutely beside himself with worry. "Where is he?"

"I put him in the dungeons to be sure he wouldn't break out and hurt someone...or himself. But I made sure it was set up like a normal room. It's all I could think of to do for him."

"If you will both excuse me..." Miroku bowed politely to Toga, gave Kagome a quick hug, and practically flew out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

By the time Miroku arrived, Sairex had shifted so he was sitting on the floor and leaning against a wall. The monk noticed that the raven was speaking, although to who or what, Miroku couldn't tell. He was talking in a broken mixture of Japanese and his clan's tongue. Every now and then he would pause, as if listening, and resume his conversation.

"Sairex?..." Miroku asked hesitantly. He received no response. With a sigh, the monk settled in to attempt to see what Sairex was saying. The raven had taught him a small bit of his native tongue so far, but nowhere near enough for the monk to hold a conversation with him.

Sairex appeared to be in a heated debate over some sort of tax increase. Due to how frustrated he seemed to be, Miroku could only assume that he was losing.

Miroku slid down against the wall, resting his staff across his lap and closing his eyes. Should Sairex need him for anything, he was determined to be there.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru was already curled up in a nest of thick furry blankets by the time Toga arrived. He blinked owlishly at his father as Toga slid into the room. Toga couldn't help but smile at the picture of his pup all cutely disheveled and sleepy, lost in a sea of cozy furs. // Not that my Sesshoumaru would ever appreciate such a sentiment. I think he'd be rather horrified if anyone referred to him as 'cute'. I remember the whole 'Fluffy' incident with Rin...//

Sesshoumaru yawned and rested his head back down. "You are much later than I would have expected..."

"Had I known what a delightfully snuggly scenario awaited me, I assure you, I would have hurried. Do you mind if I join you?"

"Of course not. It is your bed, after all." Sesshoumaru watched through half-lidded eyes as Toga drifted about his room, changing into his sleeping pants and letting his hair down. After a quick but thorough brushing to assure he would minimize any nasty tangles, he made his way into bed and under the covers, his arms automatically curling around Sesshoumaru's waist and pulling him in close.

Sesshoumaru gave him a cursory sniff, one eyebrow hiking in disbelieving curiosity. "You smell of arousal and raven...this Sesshoumaru is curious as to what exactly it was that kept you."

"I can assure you that whatever your imagination can dream up for what I may or may not have been doing with Sairex, you're probably wrong. He rather seems to have lost his mind. I hope his insanity is temporary."

"That is still not much of an explanation."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "Since when do I need to explain my actions to anyone?"

Sesshoumaru appeared taken aback, and then his cheeks flushed and he averted his eyes - which was no easy feat, considering he was curled up against Toga. "Forgive me, my Lord Father, it was not my place to questi--" Sesshoumaru found himself cut off as Toga caught him in a soft but intimate kiss.

"You are free to ask me anything you wish, my Sesshoumaru. I was only teasing. As for what occurred...in the grip of his insanity, the raven attempted to seduce me."

"To some effect, it would seem."

It was Toga's turn to flush ever so slightly. "Well, he got a little...grabby...and I was not expecting it. But now it is my turn to ask questions...why is it that YOU smell so strongly of Inuyasha?"

"Ah...well..." Sesshoumaru sighed inwardly. Even though he knew he was in for a reprimand, he would not lie to his Lord Father. "I went to go speak with him. I owed him an apology for things I said while I was possessed and could not rest properly until I had cleared the air. He helped me back to the room."

"So you were indeed possessed then...and all the story was as Inuyasha said?"

"Mm. I went to my room and something gripped me...I touted beliefs that I no longer subscribe to and assaulted him. He did not wish to fight...and I found my body gripping Tetsusaiga and performing a Wind Scar directly before I teleported myself into the path of it."

Toga nodded. "Yes...that is what I was told. I did at first think that perhaps it was he who assaulted you, although I could not fathom the reason."

"Inuyasha is not the sort to initiate combat with me."

Toga's expression turned into a frown. "Wait...you went to see him? You were out of bed and wandering around?"

"Yes, my Lord Father, I was."

"Dammit, Sesshoumaru..." Toga sighed and nuzzled his pup's throat gently. "Do not exert yourself like that until you are healed. I know you do not like to think that you are in any way weak or incapable, but please. I do not want you to fall ill again. You must rest until you are better."

Sesshoumaru let out a little breath and closed his eyes. "I am fine and know my limits."

"You know them and you push them at all times, which is precisely why you must remain in bed. Just because you are capable of movement does not mean you should invite the consequences. And you are hardly fine."

"You worry too much."

"No, I worry precisely the right amount. Now stop being such a naughty puppy and go to sleep."

"I am most certainly NOT any such thing!"

Toga chuckled before pinning Sesshoumaru on his back, an affectionate grin on his face. "You are whatever I say you are."

Despite being pinned and Toga's confidence, Sesshoumaru still had a rather defiant look. Toga couldn't help but grin wider - he teased his pup on purpose, loving the sunfire sparks that flared in his eyes when he got passionate about something, be it the fire of anger or otherwise.

Sesshoumaru looked as if he wanted to say several dozen different things, ranging in level from petulant to scathing, but he settled on a rather pouty huff. Even in jest he could not bring himself to so blatantly disrespect his Lord Father. Toga knew for certain that no other individual alive or dead had seen Sesshoumaru pout, and it made him smile.

Sesshoumaru let out a somewhat startled gasp as Toga's teeth found his throat, sinking into the delicate flesh for a moment as his father growled low, possessively in his chest. "You are what I say you are, my Sesshoumaru, because you are mine. You belong to me. You have always belonged to me, will always belong to me."

Golden eyes widened in surprise at Toga before half sliding shut, the possessive words sending a shiver down his spine. Unbidden but from the depths of his heart he heard his own response come. "Yes, my Lord Father....I am yours. Only yours..." The words were freeing, really...a delicious release from his own cares and concerns as he gave himself over. It was the truth. Ever since he was capable of conscious thought, he had known that he belonged utterly to his Lord Father.

Toga smiled as he lifted his head, gazing down at Sesshoumaru, before leaning in to kiss him soundly. It was a deep, thorough and lazy kiss that seemed to have no end. His arms curled around Sesshoumaru's waist and held him tightly even as his pup returned the embrace. It seemed to linger on for nearly an eternity before Toga pulled away, just far enough to nuzzle his tired pup's throat. "Sleep, my Sesshoumaru..." he murmured.

"I love you, my Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru whispered. Oh, how he meant it. How could he ever make Toga understand that the very thing that had jarred him from his suicidal depression and made him fight for his soul...that it was for love of him, for love FROM him? That knowing how much he meant to this creature he revered above all others had moved him so deeply? Sesshoumaru was not given to saying such things. These were words he had said only a handful of times in his life, never since he became an adult. And he would never say them to another, no matter how long he should live or how deep his feelings ran for them. No. This was a gift he gave only to one.

Toga squeezed Sesshoumaru a bit more tightly against him and pressed a kiss to his temple. "And I you, my precious Sesshoumaru. Now sleep."

A few moments later and he did.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku groaned softly as he shook his head, trying to clear the cobwebs from his mind. Where was he? What was this place? It looked to be a cave of some sort.

Ew! It was damp and smelled somewhat foul. With a scowl of distaste he clambered out of the hole and began to walk. Everything seemed a blur. He tried to recall what he had been doing, what he had been planning on doing. In the distance, he saw a village.

His initial reaction was that he should ride into the village and take what he wanted! Yes! Plunders and women!

Some part of him railed at the thought, however, and he found himself confused and torn. He almost yelped when a man appeared near him. "Excuse me, traveler, are you lost? I don't mean to be rude, but you're just...staring..."

Naraku blinked, then nodded slowly. "Yes, I believe I am..."

"Oh! How terrible. Come, I'll get you something to eat and a place to rest. You look as if you've been in a bit of a fight."

Naraku nodded blankly. The cheery villager turned to look at him again.

"What's your name?"

Naraku opened his mouth to respond...but found he had no answer.


	80. Chapter 79

Pride (In the Name of Love) 79 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I have decided that I have GOT to get me one of them Toga things. He's delicious. I also need a spellchecker that does not like to randomly change words I type into words it thinks fit better. -_- I'm finding all sorts of...retarded grammatical errors...

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"Miroku! Vake up! Miroku!"

Miroku blinked his eyes open immediately. He winced as he sat up straighter, his muscles a bit stiff. Sairex was standing near the bars of his cell, eyes alight. Miroku's own eyes widened as he took in the sight of his lover. Sairex was a bloody mess, with deep gouges in his arms, red marks at his throat, and countless other scratches. "Dear gods, what have you done to yourself?"

"I tried to ztrangle myzelf, actually. But never mind dat. I figured it out!"

"You did WHAT?!" Miroku's eyes widened further.

"Kaa, I'm fine, I vas able to ztop myzelf. And it gave me an idea."

The monk looked at his lover hesitantly - Sairex's eyes were gleaming as they always did when the raven was excited about something and, as far as he could tell, the raven was fully coherent. "Is it safe to let you out? Are you over... whatever happened?"

"Eh? No, not yet. But zhe grows veaker, and is resting."

"Who? What in the hells happened to you?"

"Oh. Vell...I got involved in a fight vith da damn demoness Zezzhoumaru brought back vith him. And I took her zoul...but zhe is fighting back. Zhe is very ztrong, it vas probably a poor idea for me to have done as I did vithout preparation. I've zuffered temporary bouts of inzanity before, but never dis bad. I zhould likely ztay in here a few more days. Right now zhe is resting." Sairex paused, a slight frown flitting across his features. "Zhould I lose dis fight, you vill have to kill me. Do not let me go free. If I lose, I am beyond zaving."

Miroku frowned and then reached through the bars, lightly running his fingers over Sairex's cheek. "I...hope you don't think your loss is likely."

"Kaa, no. I just don't vant to take any chances. But Miroku! Listen, I have an idea...!"

"Alright, alright...what's your idea?"

Sairex grinned triumphantly. "Vhat if we DON'T remove your vind tunnel?"

Miroku eyed him for a long moment. "Then I die a rather unpleasant and untimely death?"

"No, no...let me finish...vhat if ve do not REMOVE it, but rather ve...move...it?"

"I don't follow."

"Da reason I've been unable to do anyting about it is because I'm not skilled enough vith curses to defeat it. I don't know how to undo it, and even if I found da methods to, dere is little chance dat I could do zo vith zuccess. But I do know a ting or two about curses in general. It's like dis. Your vind tunnel, it be bound to your bloodline. Vhen a new child is born to your line, dey are inflicted vith dis curse as vell."

"Yes, I know...go on..." Miroku wondered where the epiphany was in all of this.

"Zo ve let it ztay bound to your blood, but ve move it. It knows vhen your blood mixes vith dat of another dat it is meant to inflict itzelf dere as vell. Zo...here is da plan. Ve mix your blood vith zomeone else's in...vell, zometing. An orb or zome zuch ting. I don't have da ability to deztroy da curse, but I'm villing to bet I could transfer it to a compatible host...in dis case, our orb."

"You're saying...move the wind tunnel off of me completely onto an object instead?" Miroku blinked. "Is that even possible?"

"Vell...its vorth a try, isn't it?"

"Oh, surely. It isn't like I've anything to lose making the attempt save a bit of blood. Is the blood really necessary?"

"Yes, I vould tink zo. Da curse might not take if it vas to be zeperated from your blood and ve vould be back vhere ve started."

"Very well. What do we need to try this?"

Sairex gave Miroku a short list of supplies and a couple of books he would need, and the monk eagerly scurried off to retrieve them.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"I hope Sairex is alright." Kagome frowned.

Inuyasha shrugged a bit. "Keh...that bird is pretty tough. I'm sure he'll be fine. Anyone who can handle Miroku can surely handle a little insanity."

Kagome turned a brighter shade of red than Inuyasha could recall seeing. He arched an eyebrow and peered at her curiously.

"What's that look for?"

"Er...what look? Nothing!"

"Kagome..."

"Let's just say I've seen a bit more of how Sairex can handle Miroku than I ever expected to."

Inuyasha blinked, then blinked again. "Wait...you mean you saw them..."

"They were in the middle of my damn living room! Miroku did it on PURPOSE!"

Inuyasha couldn't help but chuckle. "Heh, once a lech, always a lech...well, at least you don't doubt that they're mated anymore."

"Heh. Not a whole lot of room for doubt left after that. So what's up with Sesshoumaru and your father? I get the idea that they have some sort of secret."

"Um...I don't think I'm supposed to say. It's kinda...well."

"Just tell me."

"They're...well...."

Kagome's eyes were starting to widen. "You can't POSSIBLY mean to tell me that he's sleeping with his own father...!"

"It's not so much the sleeping as what else I think they're doing. Can't say for sure, but...it's likely. All I've seen with my own eyes is a couple not-so-fatherly kisses."

"But that...that's..."

"Youkai society wouldn't be too accepting of it either. Especially considering their political standing. But...if it makes them happy, why should I care? Sessh needs someone that can take care of him and I don't think there's anyone else on the planet he'd submit to."

"Sesshoumaru? Submit? Never."

"You obviously haven't seen the two of them together in any real capacity. Sessh would give him his throat without a moment's hesitation, I guarantee it."

Kagome decided she would think about THAT little bit later. "So what about you? Everyone I've asked has been marvelously unhelpful in giving me any information. You got a mate floating about somewhere?" Kagome glanced around a bit, as if expecting to see said mate.

"Er...um...well...I...whaddaya wanna know that for anyway?!" Kagome couldn't help but notice how red the hanyou was starting to turn. "Keh, its not like its official. Or even a love thing. Its not even a like thing...."

"So there IS someone?!"

Inuyasha swallowed, realizing he was caught. "Uh...well...I mean...its kinda...an off and on thing. Never really intended for it to go anywhere..."

"What's she like? Oooh, can I meet her?"

Inuyasha flushed harder and looked down. "Er...its...not a her."

Kagome blinked, then stared. She decided to accept it in good graces, however, if it made her friend happy. Although... she secretly wondered why all the males she knew seemed to be turning out to be as straight as circles. "Oh. Well, can I meet him then?"

Inuyasha mumbled and toed the floor. "You already have."

Kagome stared. "You're...involved with someone I know? Who?"

Inuyasha was reluctant to answer, knowing full well he was going to get a hell of a lot of teasing. However, the decision of whether or not he wanted to spill it was abruptly taken out of his hands when Kouga's head peeked into the room.

"Kagome!" The wolf prince darted over and clasped her hands tightly before giving up on that and instead pulling her into a tight hug.

"Oh..! Hi, Kouga...! I didn't expect to see YOU here..."

"My wolves are the official castle guard and I'm a general or somethin'. More to the point, I didn't expect to see YOU here! I thought you went back home for good!"

"Well, I had to come back and help Sesshoumaru..." Kagome slowly turned to look at Inuyasha. The hanyou had a bewildered look on his face, as if entirely unsure of himself and what to do. "Inuyasha? Is everything okay?"

Kouga burst out laughing. "This is the part where he USUALLY gets all hyper-jealous at me for being so much more of a dead sexy beast than he is and starts yellin' and throwin' insults and trying to get you away from me."

Kagome giggled a bit. "I see...so what's different this time?"

Kouga smirked and leaned forward conspiratorily. "Now I think he doesn't know if he should be jealous of me or for me."

Kagome's jaw dropped as she began to process that. "Wait...you mean...YOU...and Inuyasha..."

Kouga backed up hastily. "Whoa! Hey, it's nothing like that!" Both of the males were blushing deeply and very studiously not looking at each other.

"As if I'd be mated to a stupid, smelly wolf anyway!"

"You want to say that to my face, mutt?"

"I'd rather stomp a hole in your face!" Claws extended, the two leapt at each other.

Kagome sighed and bit back a smile. Maybe things hadn't changed so much after all...


	81. Chapter 80

Pride (In the Name of Love) 80 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Sometime after I finish re-watching / watching the rest of Inuyasha (now that I officially have all the dvds on my shelf =D ) I'll start the editing process. But my grammar still is not perfect so...if there is someone with a better grasp on it than myself that wishes to help me beta this beast, I'll be gratefully accepting of your help. Drop me an email.

If anything I say in this chapter flies in the face of Inuyasha canon?...I claim ignorance and creative license. This is how it happened in MY world. =P LOL

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Inuyasha stopped and stared at Miroku and Sairex. The two of them noted his presence and casually greeted him.

The hanyou had decided, after his scuffle with Kouga, to check up on them and make sure everything was alright. He wasn't sure what he had expected to see when he went down to the dungeons, but this probably wasn't it. Miroku and Sairex were sitting next to each other, leaning against the opposite side of the cell's bars. They were chatting casually as if nothing was amiss, even as they both sat there with long cuts in their palms and working on, apparently, allowing their blood to fill a bowl sitting between them.

"What in the fuck are you doing?"

Miroku blinked for a minute before noticing the direction of Inuyasha's gaze. "Bleeding, of course."

Inuyasha ground his teeth. "Miroku."

The monk chuckled. "I know, it looks strange. But if all I have to risk is a little blood to maybe deal with this hole in my hand, I'm willing to make the effort."

"So why didn't you just borrow one of those needle things Kagome brought for Sesshoumaru? Seems a lot less painful."

Miroku and Sairex exchanged a glance. Sairex closed his eyes and barely restrained from slapping himself in the forehead. "Kaa...I can't tink of everyting..."

"Eh, we're almost done anyway. I don't care if I have a cut to deal with."

Inuyasha shook his head slowly. "So how exactly is this supposed to help?"

"Long story, but we plan on attempting to partially trick the curse and move the wind tunnel off of me. Neither of us can defeat the curse, we haven't seen any sign of Naraku, an--"

"Er..." Sairex mumbled and gave Miroku a pained, guilty look.

"What?"

"I...zaw dis Naraku. Ve fought briefly, but he escaped."

Inuyasha was the first to respond. "Naraku was here?! In this castle?! And you let him get away?!"

"Hn. It vasn't like dat. I vas...dealing vith da other raven...and in her panic, zhe zummoned him to defend her. He looked rather zurprised to be zuddenly yanked troo a portal and expected to do mortal combat vith me. I attacked him but he's ztrong. He vas not up for a fight and fled. I could not catch him."

Miroku frowned, then a thought occurred to him. "Wait...what about the baby? You didn't..."

Sairex smiled slightly. "No, of course not. I vas in dere to deal vith da raven after da birth. Da baby is... vell. Beautiful. It's a girl."

Miroku grinned hugely. "Well, congratulations. I would congratulate you more properly, but these bars in our way do make such things so difficult."

"I'm still sittin' here, y'know..."

Sairex peered at Inuyasha. "Vhy is dat, exactly? You look like you're avoiding zometing."

Inuyasha flushed and poked at the ground, growling and mumbling to himself. "Stupid wolf..."

Miroku chuckled. "I've always wanted to ask you about that...and now that you seem to be intent on avoiding all and sundry, perhaps I shall. What HAS gone on with you and Kouga?"

Inuyasha looked as though he was seriously considering running off, but he ended up staying and letting out a huff. For all the years he'd spent with Miroku, he supposed he owed his friend an explanation. "Well...its kinda complicated."

"It always is. How can I explain my relationship with Sairex? Oh, we met while we were sharing a body and things went from there, and by the time we actually got to see each other in person it was a done deal!"

Sairex smirked. "Vell...zometing like dat."

Inuyasha sighed. "Well. Kouga and I always argued but...we...I dunno. Had a grudging respect of sorts for each other over time. We had a common bond with Kagome. We even kinda got to be friends. So when Kagome made the decision to go back home, I left for a while."

"I remember. You went to tell Kouga?"

"Yeah. He was kinda upset, actually. I think he had some sorta dim hope that things would have worked out for them. I felt kinda bad and decided to stick around to help him out. His tribe was in some sort of scuffle with another pack of invading demons and everything was tense and strained. I helped slash 'em up and things got a lot better for the wolves. They accepted me as one of their own. Especially those two clowns Ginta and Hakkaku." Inuyasha rolled his eyes but couldn't hide a slight grin.

"Anyway, Kouga was really grateful too cause it made his life as leader easier. That's when I learned he had this whole group of elders bitchin' at him. I guess Kouga's the ultimate authority as alpha and Prince, but the word of the elders carries a lot of weight and he can't really disregard them."

"What were they, er...so upset with him about?" Miroku asked, arching an eyebrow.

"Well, I guess when they found out Kagome was gone they were all, 'I told you so!' at him. Kouga refused to take a mate because he had insisted that he would get Kagome in the end. The elders never thought it would happen, and they were feelin' pretty triumphant. They were demanding Kouga find himself a nice wolf girl and get to makin' the next generation, his 'duty' as their leader. Which I thought was kinda stupid...the wolves don't run things like my family does. Their rulership isn't hereditary, so what's it matter if Kouga has kids or not? But I guess they think it's his duty cause he's strong and his cubs would probably be strong too, an asset to the pack."

Miroku smiled inwardly. Actually, he was thrilled internally...hearing Inuyasha so casually refer to his 'family'. His hanyou friend had truly come home, then. // Ah, I'm so glad that some of the holes in your heart can start to be filled. You suffered far too long, Inuyasha. This is what you have deserved. A home, your blood kin...I know your father loves you despite your recent conflicts, and...well. Sesshoumaru's always been hard to read, but I get the idea he does too, in his own way. // "Such is the burden of most of those in the ruling family. You are spared it because Sesshoumaru is Heir, and thus all the...familial duties...fall on him. And even that is postponed considering your father has returned. And no one can deny that he has already fulfilled his duties in such regard."

Sairex bit his lip almost hard enough to make it bleed. Oh, it was entirely true that he loved Miroku...but he knew some part of him would always love the inu that had saved his very soul. No matter the truth of the monk's words, it didn't mean he liked to be reminded of one of the major reasons he had had to leave Toga behind. He barely bit back a sudden laugh, however, when he realized that he had inadvertently acquired his own Heir. // Hah. Irony... //

"Yeah, well, anyway...it was really eatin' at him. The stupid wolf is...well, I guess he's not such a bad guy at heart. Even if he is mangy and flea-bitten and wears a skirt. Anyway... he was pretty fuckin' depressed and stressed out so I found reasons to get him away from his pack to spar or do patrols or whatever so he wouldn't have to deal with them. And I gotta say, Ginta and Hakkaku aren't as stupid as they seem a lot of times. They always backed me up and deflected the elders so Kouga could make good on his escape."

"I see. And on one of your outings, you realized you were destined to be together, an--ow!"

Inuyasha sat back down after whapping the monk soundly upside the head. "Keh. We were just actin' normal and got in a fight when we were in a spring and were really rollin' around and stuff and...I don't know." Inuyasha had begun a slow burn and was almost as red as his favored haori. Despite having been provided a full new wardrobe, he still wore the Fire-Rat robes when he wasn't dealing with the public. "Anyway. We...er...both relieved some tension or something. Then I came back to see how things were going. Much to my surprise, I had a monk waiting for me."

Miroku sighed. "Yes. My turn, I take it... When Sango and I returned to her village we began to rebuild. She was very...driven... to restore things to their former glory. A few people from neighboring villages started coming and helping. Sango was going to train new demon slayers. The biggest problem with all of this is that she focused all of her energies on rebuilding her clan and her home and... well. She didn't have any time for me. Ever. In fact, it got to the point she was so distracted didn't even notice when I would leave for a few days at a time."

Inuyasha blinked. "Damn...I'm sorry...that's just not right."

Before Inuyasha could start a rant, Miroku held up his hand. "I do not fault her, Inuyasha. I never have. It is an admirable, daunting task that she took on. It is the most important thing in her life, and I can not blame anyone for following their heart and their dreams. We did not leave on poor terms. I will hold her dear to my heart and as a good friend for all my days. But we fell out of love...and I ultimately found I could not be content living in her village. I was too used to the lifestyle we had. Traveling, saving people, slaying demons...it is fulfilling."

"Yeah, I hear ya. But there's good things about havin' a place to come home to, too. And we still are helpin' people, just in different ways."

"And some things are worth changing one's life for..." Here Miroku's eyes shifted to give Sairex a meaningful look. The raven blushed but couldn't hide a smile.

"Hey, none of that in front of me..." Inuyasha scowled. "Kagome told me what you did in her living room."

Miroku burst out laughing and Sairex's blush burned a lot brighter all of a sudden.

"To vhat, exactly, does he refer, monk?"

"Ah, well...I rather...er...Kagome noticed us and I noticed her notice us but didn't feel the need to stop unless she said something. Besides, I think she's almost as perverted as she insists that I am, she just hides it better. It was a gift to her."

Sairex's eyes were huge. "E...Exactly vhen did you...notice her noticing?"

Miroku thought about it for a moment. "Hmm...I think right after I first kissed you on the couch." He nodded. Yes, that sounded about right.

Sairex looked about ready to faint. "Zh...zhe vatched da WHOLE TING?! And you KNEW?!"

"I can't blame her for looking, you're beautiful when-"

"Okay, totally have heard enough. I'm out of here." Inuyasha stood and made a hasty retreat.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku scowled at the hoe in his hands. Tilling fields was SO not his style. He didn't really know what his style WAS, to be honest...and this seemed to be what all the OTHER village men were doing. He had assumed emulating the normal lives of other villagers may help him to remember what his own life had been like. But instead of wanting to use the hoe on the earth in front of him, he had the dark thought it would be much more satisfying to crack over a villager's head.

With a heavy sigh, he resumed working. Things would clear up eventually.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"The damn fool..." Jormandar hissed in agitation. "She wasn't even content to die alone, she had to drag that Naraku character with her. He had potential. I'm surprised she didn't take you too."

"I am not so easily bound, especially since she gave you my phylactery." Tsetsukosei rumbled.

"Are you at full capacity again, then?"

"Yes. There are two ways we can go about this, Jormandar. You can attempt to force me to serve you and you will succeed. Eventually I will rise against you in effort to reclaim my phylactery, end either way you lose. I will either kill you or you will destroy me and be out my assistance. The second route is to make a deal with me. Our goals are largely the same. You want to use me to get your revenge on Sesshoumaru. I wish to get my claws on Sesshoumaru regardless, and get my own revenge. So we make a deal. I will perform these tasks you have set before me. Then you will relinquish my phylactery to me. I will reclaim my castle and we will remain allies."

Jormandar scowled. "I will think on it. I did not believe your consciousness would be so fully restored. I intended to find a way to learn your magic. It is unique. I covet it. I shall make you a deal. Teach me and serve me in these tasks, and the phylactery is yours. I shall even let you keep Sesshoumaru, provided you promise me he suffers eternally."

"That is a promise I am happy to make. You have a deal."


	82. Chapter 81

Pride (In the Name of Love) 81 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Still no exciting news. Really hope y'all have been reading my sidestories for my Pride universe and come up with things you might like to see! I've got some days off and would love to fulfill a request or two if I don't come up with my own.

This one is a bit long but I couldn't very well cut off in mid-scene...and I wanted to hit 350 pages /200k words. Woo! It's a "Let's Celebrate Jessi's Day Off" Chapter. My gift to you all. Or the first in a two part gift...

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"So, what do I need to do?"

"Vell...you're da monk 'ere. I have zpiritual magic, but you 'ave holy magic. Zo I need da box...tank you." Sairex lifted the small rectangular metal box Miroku had brought. He abruptly dropped it as it crackled with purple-blue energy. "Dis is very...nice. Vhat are all dese runes and zuch?" The raven rubbed his scorched fingertips ruefully.

"Ah...I'm so sorry! Those are...er. Sacred prayers and blessings and such. I used to keep some sacred charms and ofuda in there. I figured it'd be perfect for the purpose. The idea is that we pop this...thing...in the box and seal it, like I seal it now with my rosary, yes?"

"Indeed. I'd put da rosary around da box too, but it might not be necessary. Couldn't hurt, though." Sairex smiled and lifted the egg-shaped glass orb. "And dis is perfect too."

"It seems Lord Toga has many fancy bits of artwork about the castle. I asked a few servants and they pointed me to a lovely display of glass birds and nests and whatnot. I figured this would work for what you said we needed."

"Perfect." Sairex lifted the heavy little glass egg and murmured softly. A small swirl of purple-black energy grew in the core of the egg and spiraled outwards. He eyed it and then smirked in satisfaction. "Here ve go." He took the glowing glass egg and dropped it into the bowl of blood. "Vell, now ve vait."

"I see...hey....are you alright?" Miroku saw a sudden tremor run through the raven.

"Take...da box...and da bowl."

Miroku took the objects in question and set them down, frowning in concern. "Are you alright?...Sairex?"

Sairex whirled abruptly, lunging forward. His claws tore into Miroku's chest and shoulder, the raven releasing a feral hiss. Only the monk's quick reflexes had saved him from getting his throat ripped out. Sairex's eyes were wide and crazed. Miroku groaned softly, hesitantly reaching up to grasp the wound. It was deep and bleeding heavily, but he had sustained worse. He was far more worried about Sairex, who was murmuring feverishly and stalking about. Without warning he would occasionally whirl and attack something. Soon he was in a screaming match and in mortal combat with something that was not there.

Much as it pained Miroku, he realized that this was precisely the reason his lover was behind bars. Sairex had already dismissed his previous episodes as a matter of course - Miroku could only hope that this one too would pass and that his raven would eventually be alright. He sighed reluctantly and moved the box and the bowl out into the adjoining hallway before going to tend to his wound. He would come back when his raven had calmed down.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Breakfast was becoming an increasingly tense affair.

Things had started out well enough. Toga, Sesshoumaru, Inuyasha, Kagome, Kouga, Ginta, Hakkaku and Rin were all seated at the table. Miroku was absent, but they had all expected that due to Sairex's condition. Conversation had started light and pleasant. Kagome had been surprised at how much better Sesshoumaru was doing and how much he had recovered. He wasn't up for any marathons around the castle and still tired easily, but his wounds had healed and it was only a matter of time before his full strength recovered.

Kagome had also been sure to give Rin some painkillers for the broken arm she'd suffered and the had helped the girl immensely. Rin was feeling much more cheerful and her usual self now.

Conversation floated about aimlessly. Kagome observed the interactions of her companions with some amusement. Kouga and Inuyasha appeared to be ignoring each other and having conversation through Ginta and Hakkaku. Toga was seated at the head of the table, idly surveying the room, although his gaze more often than not strayed to Sesshoumaru. Sesshoumaru was giving token agreements to Rin's happy chattering, the ghost of a smile flitting across his lips.

Things changed when Sesshoumaru turned his gaze to his father. "My Lord Father...this Sesshoumaru would know if you have reached a decision regarding the request from the northern badger's caravan."

"I have. I have elected to grant their request."

Sesshoumaru slapped his glass down on the table so forcefully that it was a miracle it didn't break. "You did WHAT?!"

Toga narrowed his eyes ever-so-slightly as the rest of the table fell silent. Kagome's eyes widened and she noticed Inuyasha's ears flatten back. Toga's voice was a shade rougher and he met Sesshoumaru's gaze levelly. "I granted their request."

"We are going to be at WAR! We can not spare guards and supplies just because a random tribe of northerners happens to be within our borders!"

"And we can not ignore the request of a tribe in distress. We need all the allies we can get right now, ESPECIALLY in regards to the north! Any show of friendship might lessen their ire towards us after Lady Shirizu's death."

"We can not afford to spare it and it will not matter! One tribe will not change the mindset of a fanatical government!" Sesshoumaru leapt to his feet, growling under his breath. Toga stood as well, meeting Sesshoumaru's gaze and rumbling deep in his own chest.

"I do not permit anyone that comes to me in need to suffer if I am capable of preventing it. We are not yet at war and there is always the possibility of changing the stakes before it occurs."

"We can not afford to spare that many of our guards and that much food. We do not know when we will be struck, how much damage will be done to the crops...!" Sesshoumaru was growling angrily, a clear threat in his tone. Kagome watched in stunned horror as she saw him flick his claws to the ready, wiggling his fingers ever so slightly. She had seen what Sesshoumaru could do when his ire was aroused. She cringed inwardly, afraid of what action he might take.

Toga noticed the clear challenge as well and his low growl turned into a much more threatening one. His lips pulled back and he bared his fangs, his eyes sparking. He was in front of Sesshoumaru in just a couple strides. A snarl slid from his throat as he glared down at his eldest pup, his aura whipping out angrily from him like a concussion of soundless thunder.

Sesshoumaru met his gaze for a long and heart-stopping moment before his muscles relaxed and he closed his eyes, his head tilting slightly to bare his throat. Kagome almost fell out of her chair, recognizing Sesshoumaru's silent submission for what it was - Inuyasha had explained it to her before. She just never expected to see Sesshoumaru back down to anyone...maybe Inuyasha had been RIGHT about his suspicions regarding his brother and his father...

Toga eyed Sesshoumaru for a moment longer before retaking his chair. Sesshoumaru followed suit, and the two of them resumed their breakfast in silence. No one else dared to say a word or hardly even breathe.

It was Toga that finally broke the silence, his tone soft and almost apologetic. Just because he wasn't about to accept any challenges to his authority didn't mean he had to enjoy proclaiming his dominance. "My Sesshoumaru, I would have you join me in court this day. I am meeting with several concerned lords and would value your council. Even if we can not agree on all things it does not mean I do not hold your opinion in high esteem."

Sesshoumaru nodded after a moment. "As you wish, my Lord Father."

The rest of the meal was largely uneventful, and the two elder inus did leave for court fairly soon after the resolution of their scuffle. Kagome let out a huff. "Geez... that was a bit more drastic than necessary."

Kouga blinked at her. "Eh? Nah. That's about the way pack life goes. Sesshoumaru challenged him, his challenge was answered, and he wisely backed off. S'a common occurrence. Not necessarily between those two, but in general."

Inuyasha smirked. "I was surprised Sessh actually challenged him, to be honest. Even before he came back...Sesshoumaru didn't tolerate the tiniest bit of disrespect in our father's direction. He almost gutted me more than once for referring to him as my old man. I'm shocked he lets me get away without calling him Lord. But don't worry about it so much, Kagome. I'll check in on them before dinner and make sure things are going okay."

Kagome nodded. She knew this was just another facet of Inuyasha's family and life that was different from what she was used to as a human and no matter how...vicious...it might seem to her, she was in their world now.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

By mid-afternoon, Naraku had decided working in the fields was something he had assuredly never done before and had no intentions of doing again. He instead went to help set some fish traps in a nearby stream.

As the kumo waded through the shallow water, he took a long and hard look at himself. He knew just by his own unfamiliar reflection that he did not belong here. None of the village men had hair as long or luxurious as him. His skin was unbroken by the rough calluses that were universal amidst the small community. His eyes were a startling shade of red, but his features appeared otherwise human.

He struggled to try and dredge things up from the depths of his memory but could not. All he could find were the briefest flashes of images...a large and dark castle...a purply-pink gemstone...a strange albino girl-child with a mirror...a red-eyed demoness with feathers in her hair. Intermingled with these inexplicable memories were flashes of looting, pillaging, burning...and the distant and hazy figure of a black-haired woman...perhaps a priestess by her garb.

None of it made sense to him, and Naraku's mood was growing increasingly dark. For some reason, he had an increasingly intense urge to slaughter his fellow humans of the village wholesale. // Fellow humans? If they are my fellows, why do they carry all the significance of ants to me? This is beneath me, I know it is. I...I have or have had some measure of power. I should be RULING this, not serving like some common peon...perhaps I should give in to this urge to loot and pillage. But somehow I feel as if to do so would be to give in to .. something. Something I've fought for a long time. But what?! //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Court proved to be roughly as boring as it usually was. Several petty lords came with issues ranging from pleas and requests to self-righteous complaints. Some were worried about rumors of war. Toga took it all in stride, reclining ever so slightly in his massive throne as he addressed their concerns. Sesshoumaru leaned against the throne itself, and occasionally gave his advice when requested or humbly offered it to his father sometimes when it was not.

Between the two of them they made short work of the hearings and were done a while before scheduled. Sesshoumaru sent the guards from the room after a long moment of silence and bid them to remain outside and not allow anyone in. Toga watched him with a raised eyebrow but said nothing until they were all gone. "What is this about?"

Sesshoumaru sighed before slowly taking a knee in front of the throne, much closer to his father but in much the same fashion as all the various visitors had shown their respect. "This Sesshoumaru would speak with you as well, my Lord Father."

"Of course, my Sesshoumaru..." Toga blinked, slightly surprised at the formal display of honor and submission.

"I wish to apologize for this morning. Even if I disagreed with you, I should not have publically challenged you so."

"Mm. It is a good trait to not accept all I say just because I have said it. And you are an alpha as well...I am surprised that you so readily can submit to me as you do."

"It is difficult at times, especially in regards to rule of the lands...but not so much in others. In other ways, it feels...proper. I am alpha, but you are the patriarch of this clan. You are my alpha. This Sesshoumaru submits to you and no other."

Toga was silent for a long moment before giving Sesshoumaru an affectionate smile. "I would have it no other way."

Sesshoumaru looked up at him for a long moment before sliding forward ever so slightly, his hands resting lightly on Toga's knees. His voice took on a low purring quality that made Toga's breath hitch and his eyes widen. "Might...this Sesshoumaru make amends for my behavior?"

Toga couldn't form a response immediately. His mind was struggling to catch up to the abrupt change in this situation, to make sure he wasn't reading things wrong. Was...was Sesshoumaru seducing him? He decided the safest response was to let Sesshoumaru do as he would. "You may do as you please, my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru gave him a smirk that was nothing short of lascivious before levering himself up using Toga's legs as a brace, leaning in to give him a soft kiss that rapidly bloomed into something much more heated. Sesshoumaru's long and slender fingers made short work of Toga's obi, and then the fastenings on his armor. Both were left to slip to the floor. Soon his hands found their way inside of Toga's haori, though he didn't bother to remove it once it was open. Apparently, as long as he could touch, he was content at the moment.

Toga bit back a groan as Sesshoumaru's caresses moved lower abruptly, firmly rubbing his rapidly growing arousal through his hakama. Sesshoumaru idly bat away any attempt to return the gesture, however, and Toga relented. If the younger taiyoukai wished to have his way with him, well...who was he to argue?

Toga's eyes flickered back open as Sesshoumaru broke free of the kiss and slithered back down to his knees. His breathing was heavy and he had a dozen things he would like to grab the pup and do, but he remained still. Sesshoumaru met Toga's gaze even as he finished freeing Toga's aching erection from his hakama. He watched him for a breathless moment through long lashes before shifting position ever so slightly. Sesshoumaru rested one hand on Toga's thigh and his other curled around the base of his cock as he leaned down, flicking his tongue over the head experimentally.

Toga thought he would be done in right there. He let out a groan and a breath he hadn't even realized he had been holding as his spine stiffened and his fingers tightened in a death grip on the arms of his throne. His resistance barely held as Sesshoumaru's tongue slowly explored him in a series of long, slow licks interspersed with the occasional delicate flick.

"Ah, GODS, my Sesshoumaru!" Toga couldn't help but gasp as Sesshoumaru abruptly shifted tactics, pulling as much of his cock down his throat as he could in one swoop. It took everything Toga had to keep from reflexively thrusting his hips up to bury himself in that wet heat, his muscles quivering slightly from the strain of holding still. Sesshoumaru paused for a moment as he struggled not to choke himself, but quickly overcame that difficulty. It seemed his rather impressive control of his body extended to the muscles of his throat as well.

Inwardly, Sesshoumaru was quite pleased with himself. He knew full well he had caught his father entirely off-guard, and, if his current reactions were anything to be judged by, he couldn't be doing too much wrong despite his lack of experience. He had been somewhat nervous - even if he'd never admit it - after his previous bad experiences and being forced into such things...but he knew that this was wholly unlike the times he'd been forced. At the moment, HE was in control...and he somehow found it incredibly erotic to know that it was entirely HIM making this godlike creature moan and writhe. He wanted it to go on forever even as he wanted to drag him over the edge.

Toga let out a hiss of breath, his claws raking gently through silky, ice-silver hair. He had never even imagined a sight half so erotic as the one he was witnessing now, seeing his hardened flesh vanish between Sesshoumaru's lips each time he rocked his head. Somehow, the symbolism of his pup kneeling before him at his throne and worshiping him thus just added to the deliciousness of the image.

Abruptly, it was all too much. Toga's gasps became more ragged until finally his back arched and he let out a somewhat strangled moan, his orgasm cascading through him like a tidal wave. Sesshoumaru didn't release him until the last of the pleasurable spasms had left Toga's body. He slowly withdrew, tongue flicking out against his lips as he gazed at Toga through his eyelashes.

Toga leaned forward and caught him, pulling him up into his lap and catching Sesshoumaru in a deep kiss. He could taste himself on Sesshoumaru's tongue, and the thought sent a fresh spike of lust through him.

Sesshoumaru finally pulled back, his voice a very soft murmur. "I take it my...apology...is acceptable?"

Toga smirked and pulled the younger taiyoukai more tightly against him. "And then some. Now you must allow me to...return the favor."

"As my Lord Father commands..."


	83. Chapter 82

Pride (In the Name of Love) 82 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Part 2? Maybe. Hehe. As of the time of writing this note, I've only had one suggestion thus far for a side-story...At first I rolled it over in my mind thinking..."Mrrow?"...then began plotting possible scenarios like I do when I strike upon an idea for 'Pride' here...and I'll probly be working on it when I'm done with this here chapter tonight since I'm early at getting started.

The latter half of this chapter was absurdly hard for me to write and I only hope I didn't do too terribly. I had the image in my head but it just didn't want to be made into words.

And for the record, I am NOT anti-het relationships... I just kinda got stuck on yaoi mode when I started writing this story s'all...ahem. Eventually there may be one or more thrown in here, depending how far this beast goes.

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Sairex sighed wearily, dropping his head against the bars of the cell. His arm was broken and he was exhausted, but sleep wasn't going to come to him. Even if it would, he could never allow it. His body ached from numerous injuries, but short of the arm none of them were too serious. // I certainly hope this doesn't last too much longer. It shouldn't. I can feel her power starting to melt into my own. It's just a matter of time. Hopefully not much more time...she's too damn powerful for me to sustain this battle. She doesn't have the issue of a physical body to deal with during all this...//

Miroku's head peeked around the corner. "Sairex?"

A pair of weary yellow eyes turned towards him and the raven gave him a small smile. "Yeah, yeah....it's me, I'm myzelf..." The exhaustion was replaced with alarm. "Vhat happened to you? Vhy are you all bandaged? I...I didn't..."

"It's alright, it's nothing serious. Don't worry about it. Is it safe to bring our little experiment back in?"

"Yes..." Sairex frowned deeply, looking guiltily at his talons. He had assumed the blood was all his own. Of course, Miroku didn't actually say that it had been him....but the fact he didn't deny it led him to believe that was the case. "Before ve get ztarted...I don't zuppose you vould mind bringing me a couple tings zo I can take care of my arm?"

"What did you...dear Buddha! I can see the bone! Oh, Sairex...!" Miroku was there in an instant, cursing the bars that made it more difficult to fret over his lover.

"It vill be fine. I heal quickly, I just need to tend it zo I can vork."

"Ill be right back...why didn't you say something sooner?!"

"I vas more vorried about vhat I had done to you dan myzelf, Miroku."

"It's only a scratch, Sairex." // A very deep scratch that almost took out my throat and laid me open pretty good, but...still, technically, I suppose it can be called a scratch. //

"Meh..."

"I'll be right back with some supplies."

It didn't take Miroku long to raid their medical supplies and come back. When he returned, he had to wince and look away. He heard a sickening crunch as Sairex forced his bone back into place so it could be properly splinted. When the monk finally looked again he saw the raven's face was pale and drawn, tight with barely suppressed pain. He did his best to treat the wound, though it was a little difficult to do through the bars.

"Are you sure you want to work on this right now? You're in a lot of pain. Here, take some of these..." Miroku offered forth a few of the pills Kagome had brought. Sairex shook his head.

"No, I von't take dem. I need to keep all my vits about me. I cannot afford to let my mind relax. Da pain is good, it keeps me zharp. Now bring me da bowl vith our little egg."

Miroku sighed reluctantly but knew there was no arguing with his bird. He put the pills back in their bottle and then retrieved the supplies for their experiment.

Sairex nodded and reached into the bowl, reaching into the bowl and plucking out the egg with his talons. He wiped it clean with a damp cloth and then murmured softly. The purplish aura surrounding it flared briefly and then vanished. The egg slowly darkened in color and seemed to somehow solidify as the aura faded. Whatever the egg now was, it surely was not glass. It was a dark but crystalline blood-red stone. Miroku had never seen its like. "Interesting..."

"Mm. Bloodztone. It vorked fairly vell. Usually zuch ztones are used for tings like ztoring energy. I'm not terribly proficient vith arcane arts using cryztals and gemztones, but I know a few very minor concepts. Now for da more tricky part. Put da ztone in da box."

Miroku did as was requested. "Alright. Now what?"

"Now I need you to loan me your energies. I vill channel dem troo me. Hopefully dis vill vork. If it does...you'll need to close dat box pretty quickly. I can't promise it vill vork, however. Curzes vere never my zpecialty either. Fortunately, I DO know a ting or two of putting power into objects. Zo, lets do dis..."

Miroku nodded and closed his eyes, clearing his mind as he offered his hand to Sairex. The raven took it and did much the same, approaching as much of a meditative state as his beleagured mind could muster. Miroku soon felt the pull on his energy and did nothing to resist it. Soon he was feeling drained and exhausted as his power flooded from him. Sairex luckily stopped before he lost consciousness, although Miroku felt more than a little wobbly. He was glad he was sitting down.

Sairex began murmuring in his own tongue, partially from memory and partially from some notes he had written earlier. As he chanted he traced a few glowing purple lines onto the bloodstone itself, although he was careful not to touch the box. When he traced the last rune and pushed the box back closer to Miroku, the stone suddenly pulsed.

Miroku's eyes fluttered open as he felt a gentle breeze brush past him. His eyes grew wider as he looked into the box. In the heart of the bloodstone was a tiny black dot which was ever so slowly expanding. As the dot grew, so too did the force of the wind.

Then Miroku felt it. He actually felt the hole in his palm shrinking. His flesh was tugged painfully, trying to stretch to fill the void but unable to do so. Blood began to run down his arm, but he paid it no attention. It was the best wound he had ever received in his life.

Abruptly, Sairex's chant reached a crescendo and ceased. Miroku felt one final, ripping tug. He had the presence of mind to slap the box shut just as the now wholly black and swirling stone exploded with the full force of his wind tunnel. Miroku quickly wrapped his rosary around the box - just to be on the safe side - and then hesitantly opened his palm. There was a nasty, bloody, fleshless hole...but the wind tunnel was gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

They were late. Inuyasha scowled. Dinner would be in just a few minutes and he HAD told Kagome he'd make sure that his father and brother weren't still at each other's throats and made it to the meal.

// Keh. Could be easier said than done. All it'd take is one or two disagreements over how to deal with all these stupid local lordlings and I could end up sole surviver in line for the crown. // Inuyasha scowled and, mind made up, stalked down the hallway to the audience hall. There were a couple of guards posted out front. Both of them appeared rather bored. After all...what sort of protection could demons like them really offer to demons like Toga and Sesshoumaru?

"My father and brother in there?" Inuyasha asked without preamble. Both of the guards had hastily straightened and were bowing to him with proper respect befitting his station.

"Yes, my Lord. Lord Sesshoumaru sent us out and we have received no further orders, save that they are not to be bothered and are done seeing denizens of the realm today."

"Keh. Outta my way."

The guards exchanged somewhat nervous looks. Sesshoumaru HAD told them not to let anyone in...but... "M-my Lord, Lord Sesshoumaru did say not to let an-anyone in..." he offered hesitantly.

Inuyasha squinted at him. "Yeah, well, he's not here and I am, and I say I'm going in. You going to stop me?" Both guards hastily shook their heads. Inuyasha nodded. "Good. Er...don't let anyone ELSE in, I guess."

Both guards nodded vigorously and saluted as Inuyasha pushed past them. He closed the massive double doors behind him and stalked through the antechamber leading to the throne room. He listened, hesitantly. He did not hear sounds of combat or arguing - in fact, strain as he might, he didn't even hear tones of normal conversation. // Huh. Wonder if they aren't here after all. // With that thought in mind, Inuyasha quietly nudged one of the huge doors open enough to slip through...and froze.

He had been pretty well convinced that his father and his brother had a much more intimate relationship going on than what they allowed as public knowledge, but that didn't mean he had expected to stumble into the middle of things. He found his breath utterly stolen from him as he took in the sight of Sesshoumaru.

He knew that such an extreme display of submission from his brother was something that was never meant for his eyes, but he couldn't bring himself to do anything but stare in slack-jawed shock. Something about the image just refused to connect in his mind. Yes, a token display of submission to his father's will was one thing to see...this was...damn, this was something else.

Sesshoumaru was on the floor on his hands and knees...or more appropriately, on his forearms and knees, His back was arched and his throat was bared, his face resting near the floor, pillowed on his mokomoko. Had Inuyasha tried, he couldn't have arranged Sesshoumaru's beautiful, graceful form in a more artful or perfect display of submission. Sesshoumaru's claws were digging fruitlessly into the smooth marble floor. Inuyasha was equally stricken by the naked passion on Sesshoumaru's face. He was making the most...perfect...little gasps of mindless passion every time his body was rocked by one of Toga's deep, lazy thrusts.

Toga was arched over Sesshoumaru, his teeth latched into his throat near the juncture of his neck and collarbone. Inuyasha hadn't really seen his father in a state of undress previously, but he was no less breathtakingly perfect than Sesshoumaru, for different reasons. Each line of his body was perfectly sculpted, a blend of grace and strength and power. // And fuck, no wonder Sessh looks so overwhelmed. He's fuckin' huge...//

Sesshoumaru was, indeed, entirely lost. His eyes were shut and he was entirely unaware of Inuyasha's presence. Actually, Inuyasha rather doubted Sesshoumaru was aware of who he was, where he was, or would respond to anything short of a world-ending cataclysm...and even that was questionable. It distantly occurred to the hanyou that both of them were distracted enough that he could likely make his escape. // Not that this is an image I'll EVER get out my brain...fuck...// It was, quite possibly, the most erotic thing he'd ever seen, and he was almost painfully aroused.

Thoughts of escape slowly evaporated as he stood there stock-still, silent, and staring. Toga released his teeth from Sesshoumaru's throat and slowly straightened, dragging the tips of his claws lightly down Sesshoumaru's back and drawing a shivery groan from the younger taiyoukai. He never missed a beat, continuing to drive his aching erection deep into Sesshoumaru's almost torturously tight body, even as his half-lidded golden eyes flicked over to look at Inuyasha.

Inuyasha almost choked when Toga's eyes locked on him, realizing he was caught and entirely unsure of what he should do. He was painfully aware of the tent he was sporting in his hakama. His ears flattened back in a submissive and silent apology. Inuyasha tended to be a rather dominant, alpha male himself...but he knew his place in the pecking order of his family and would never challenge his father or brother's dominance.

Toga's lips slowly quirked into a breathless grin. He knew ALL about the more intimate encounters...and near misses...Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru had shared. It hadn't taken long to find out, really...Sesshoumaru answered his questions without ever thinking to hide anything even if he WAS a little hesitant on details. // Mm...my Sesshoumaru... but I suppose I could see fit to...share...on occasion. // His grin turned into something of a smirk and he motioned Inuyasha over with a slight jerk of his head.

Inuyasha's eyes widened. Everything felt vaguely dreamlike and unreal, but he slowly made his way closer. Toga wrapped his arms around Sesshoumaru's waist and lifted him easily, shifting him so he was laying on his side. Sesshoumaru gave a tiny noise of protest that melted into a moan as Toga repositioned himself behind him and slid back into him. Sesshoumaru's eyes had opened slightly when he was shifted, and they snapped open completely as he realized they weren't alone anymore. His breath caught in his throat as he stared at Inuyasha, although his attention was sorely fractured. Gods, but his Lord Father had entirely mastered every inch of his body and knew just how to draw the most extreme reactions from him...

"Mm, my Sesshoumaru...no reason I should be ENTIRELY selfish with you, is there?..." // Only mostly selfish. //

Sesshoumaru really wanted to answer, and he tried. However, he found he couldn't quite form so much as a word, especially when Toga's teeth and lips started wreaking havoc on his sensitive ear and back down to his throat.

Inuyasha had never been one to waste much time once he had made up his mind on a course of action and he slowly slid down next to Sesshoumaru. His brother's dazed golden eyes were half open and fixated on him. Inuyasha smirked, somewhat amused to see Sesshoumaru, always so calm and collected, in such a mindblown state. He stretched out in front of him and leaned in to give him a firm kiss. Sesshoumaru returned it automatically, a small whimper sliding unbidden from him at the sudden friction against his swollen cock. Inuyasha ground lewdly against him in response.

Inuyasha broke the kiss and began trailing little licks and nibbles down the length of Sesshoumaru's body. However, he didn't have much intent to tease - from the mindless way Sesshoumaru was groaning, he assumed he wouldn't hold out too long. With a content, growly little purr, Inuyasha swallowed Sesshoumaru's cock to the hilt and began to rock his head. His tongue seemed to be everywhere, his sharp fangs a threat that was never carried out. Inuyasha smirked internally as Sesshoumaru almost choked on a groan. Toga had propped himself up on one arm to enjoy the show through half-lidded eyes, his other arm wrapped firmly around Sesshoumaru's waist to limit his involuntary writhing and thrashing.

Inuyasha's fingers had slid into his hakama and he was stroking himself firmly, his own mind shifting into standby. He had wanted to get a good taste of Sesshoumaru, even if fate had previously prevented it...and now that he was, he was not disappointed. He was well aware that things would be very different if the two of them got together while they were alone - Sesshoumaru would not be such a pliant and submissive creature. He was grateful to his father that he was allowed to share in that, even if it had been an accident.

Sesshoumaru had decided he had lost his mind, finally. Too much sensation...oh, gods, how could anyone stand it? He was surely going mad. His heart was about to burst...it had to be, it could not continue to pound at this rate and do anything but. Every one of Toga's thrusts made him feel as if he was going to be split apart, driving up into him and grinding perfectly against THAT place...oh, it felt as though he was rubbing against his soul. In some distant way it hurt, but it was a delicious burn that made him delirious. And as if that wasn't enough...Inuyasha was making love to him with his mouth and GODS, but his brother was magic. He had never expected him to be quite so talented. Pleasure sounded through Sesshoumaru's mind in silvery tones, resonating at an ever higher pitch. He clawed at the floor in front of him, desperate to grab hold of something, his mokomoko shuddering and writhing almost as much as the rest of him was.

Everything shattered into white and Sesshoumaru wondered if his heart had finally burst. His body jolted and he let out a strangled cry as his orgasm clawed its way out of him. Spots flickered behind his eyes and he was vaguely sure the universe had ended. Yes, surely it must have. Everything was swirling, nothing made sense...all that existed was this throbbing flood of sensation.

Toga let out a breathless groan that turned into something of a growl, his own climax seizing him. He had only been holding on by a thread, overcome by the scene playing out before him and the indescribable pleasure of Sesshoumaru's body against him, around him... He shuddered as he buried himself as deeply as he could into Sesshoumaru's deliciously spasming body and let go.

Inuyasha was quick to follow the both of them, releasing Sesshoumaru from between his lips and throwing his head back in an almost-howl, collapsing bonelessly to the floor. He was distantly aware that he had just made a terrible mess of his hakama, but he really didn't care.

Toga smirked slightly and tilted Sesshoumaru's head enough so he could kiss him soundly. Sesshoumaru returned it with a small noise that made the elder inu almost want to chuckle. His pup was almost entirely unable to move, and it appeared his brain was still fried. // Good. If I could get away with it, I'd keep him this way... of course, I'd die of dehydration in a week, but it'd be worth it... //

Inuyasha struggled to remember what it was that had brought him here in the first place. It hit him and he sat up with a groan. "Nn...I..." He swallowed, finding it hard to speak at the moment. "S'dinner time... I told Kagome I'd come get you guys...."

Toga smiled at him, his hands idly trailing over some of Sesshoumaru's stripey markings. Sesshoumaru was simply exhausted and didn't bother to move or open his eyes. "We will be out shortly..."

"Yeah, I gotta go clean up myself." Inuyasha flashed them both a quick grin before dragging himself to his feet and making his way to the door.

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A/N - There. =P


	84. Chapter 83

Pride (In the Name of Love) 83 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Another little twist of sorts, though not quite so evil as before. Lol...the last one I did just to be mean, y'know. Sif I'd make Sairex actually a bad guy. Tempting as the thought was....lol. See an additional note at the end of this chapter.

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Kagome flashed Inuyasha a sunny smile as he made his way into the room. "Hey, Inuyasha...mm, why did you change your clothes?" Inuyasha wasn't wearing his Fire-Rat robes, and that was generally a noteworthy occurrence.

"Ah...kinda got dirty, figured I should wash em and not come to dinner all messy." The hanyou flashed her a bright smile, and barely restrained a relieved sigh as she apparently accepted this answer.

Soon the rest of the usual dinner party had filed into the room. Toga and Sesshoumaru entered and took their seats. Sesshoumaru was very studiously not looking at anything but the table in front of him, his expression roughly as revealing as a rock. Toga sipped at a cup of tea, using the mug to hide his amused grin. Inuyasha cast the occasional sly glance towards the two of them but didn't say a word.

Kouga walked in and plunked himself down next to Inuyasha. He turned a curious, rather surprised expression on the hanyou as he gave a slight sniff, his eyes widening. His mouth opened to comment, but he stopped dead as the most murderous glare he had ever seen was shot at him from Sesshoumaru. He wisely decided to not comment.

Kagome peered at Sesshoumaru in concern. "Sesshoumaru, are you alright? You look exhausted. Have you been pushing yourself too hard again?"

Sesshoumaru twitched ever so slightly and Inuyasha shoved a much-too-large bite of food into his mouth to muffle the laughter that really wanted to burst out at Kagome's innocent inquiry. Sesshoumaru's answer was grated out as if keeping his tone level was horribly difficult. "This Sesshoumaru is fine."

"Really?" Kagome frowned, but Toga interrupted smoothly.

"I thank you for your concerns for my Sesshoumaru, Lady Kagome. He has had a busy day and is merely tired. I assure you, he was not unduly stressed, and it is nothing a nice nap will not cure. He, on the other hand, looks as though he may require some attention..."

Kagome shifted her gaze to look where Toga had turned to look. Miroku was leaning heavily on his staff as he made his way into the room.

The monk sighed wearily and sank into a chair. "Mm...food..."

Kagome stared. Miroku had bandages almost everywhere, it seemed, and looked utterly exhausted. "Miroku, what the hell happened to you? Are you alright?"

"I'm fine. Or will be." Miroku presented a small metal box wrapped in his rosary from somewhere in his robes and set it on the table with a brilliant grin. "In this box is my wind tunnel. It is no longer on me. Sairex was successful in moving it." His friends let out a collective gasp of joy and surprise and almost all started talking at once. Miroku related the story of all that had happened and explained that Sairex had pretty well chased him out - the raven was insistent that Miroku needed food and rest.

Sesshoumaru was horribly glad the attention was off of him and he risked the very slightest of glances in Inuyasha's direction. The hanyou was still grinning hugely and eating like a wild beast. Sesshoumaru twitched again and angrily stabbed at a piece of meat on his plate, almost jumping when Toga's hand came to rest on his arm. His gaze flicked over to his father. Toga simply gave him an affectionate, calming smile. Sesshoumaru let out a breath and forced himself to relax. Even still...he had the feeling it was going to be a long meal....

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Something was teasing the edges of Sairex's senses, but the exhausted raven could hardly distinguish reality from fiction anymore. But this white light...no. It couldn't possibly be real.

"You called to me, Scion of the Dark. And yet you now ignore me. Indeed, you are on the verge of collapse."

"Kaa..." Sairex struggled to sit up straighter, his yellow eyes narrowing. He didn't FEEL like he was out of it...but it was getting so hard to tell. He spoke in his native tongue, knowing she would understand him if she was real...and if she were a dream, what did it matter? "Why...would you answer my call...? Did you not fear I may destroy you?"

"I have come to destroy YOU, although I must know why it is you chose to call me. I only came because I could feel your aura...you, who have always been so carefully concealed or too dangerous to fight...you are on the verge of death or worse."

Sairex's vision didn't want to cooperate, but he forced it to. Slowly he took in the sight of the female before him. She was a beautiful creature, surely. Her skin was very pale, almost the same shade as her long and oddly feathery white hair. A pair of stripes graced either of her cheeks - the larger top one was a vibrant yellow and the smaller one beneath it was black. Gleaming white wings were folded at her back, and she was dressed in a flowing, gossamer white gown decorated with gold and onyx. Sighing, the raven closed his eyes. "Kill me if you will. I am not certain I will be able to win my battle regardless. But hear me first."

"Why should I hear you?" the demoness' soft voice asked. "You, who are steeped in the blood of your kin?"

"They were wicked and needed to die."

"You are wicked as well, Sairexannaras, but in different ways."

"So be it...but if you kill me, egret, does that not make us the same? I killed my clan for the evil inherent in them. If you kill me for the same reason, you are no different than I."

"Never accuse me of being the same as you or your kin, dark one."

"I accuse you of nothing, egret. Merely wish you to grant me a request before I die. It is one that will sit well with you, I assure you."

"I will hear you." The demoness shifted her pristine wings ever so slightly before sitting down in a chair. Sairex propped himself up against the wall where he had collapsed moments after Miroku left. He was surprised he had had the strength to stay up until his lover left...

"War is coming to this land. The east will at least in part ally with the west, although I fear for dissent amidst the ranks. Kanjiro's mate will not sway the hearts of all her people, not when the rivalry between the two lands has been so marked. The north will march in force...Shirizu's people were fanatically devoted to her."

"It was a sad day for my people when she was murdered at the hands of the very inu lord I fear you are to ask me to protect."

"Toga was innocent. Believe me or not, but it is the truth. Jormandar of the Circle manipulated Kanjiro and caused the whole mess. The war coming here will cause the death of countless innocents. Toga is a living legend, and his sons are mighty as well. They will take down hundreds of demons or humans on their own."

"This is as you say, dark one."

"You can stop the north, egret!"

"And reveal myself? My clan? We are few, thanks to the persecution of your own. You yourself have killed my brethren, Sairexannaras."

Sairex sighed. "I was young and foolish. I did as my father demanded. I apologize, even though it is not enough. But damn it all...I know there are only a few of you...and I do not care what you do to me. Get your vengeance, then, if it makes you feel better...but stop the north. Do not let so many die needlessly. Shirizu loved her people."

"My sister took many needless risks. It is a wonder she was never discovered for what she was."

"Honor her wishes for her people to live in safety and happiness, then!"

"By defending a bloodthirsty warlord and his wicked son?"

"Toga is not bloodthirsty...he expanded his empire thousands of years ago and united many smaller tribes...and now the West prospers. He crushed all the small tribes to unite them and now overlooks all of them. It was for their own good, ultimately. He does not wage war against the other kingdoms!"

"And his son? This Sesshoumaru? He is rather cold and ruthless. The deaths of many are on his head."

Sairex sighed heavily. "I ask it in defense of them, yes...but you will do it in defense of your own."

"I am not so attached to the humans and demons of the realm as my sister was, nor am I keen on the defense of this inu lord. If the north and south march on him in combination, with or without the east, the West is likely to fall."

Sairex hissed in frustration. "Damn it! You would let so much blood be spilled when you have a chance to stop it?! I thought you and yours were all about peace and healing and love!"

"And sometimes, to protect that peace, war must be waged. I am still not certain I believe your tale of this inu lord being innocent of the death of my sister. Nor am I sure that stopping this war would be for the best, ultimately. It may be that the death of the last of the House of the Inu no Taisho would be a boon. But for the sake of my sister and the land and people she loved...I will see. She would not wish them to die in her name or for her memory. I will...test...this inu lord. If he is not wicked, as you say, then I will make a decision from there. You ask much, for me to reveal myself."

"Conceal your nature as Shirizu did. Surely you have the power to do so."

"You...do not beg me to spare your life, raven?"

"No."

"Your request is selfless and made for the right reasons. I do not trust you, but I would not even have spared a second thought to assaulting any other of your clan. You are dark, but you are different than them. So your life will be in the balance. Should this inu and his children pass my tests...I will reveal myself to the north and halt their participation in this war. Without the north to back them and virtually no support from the east, the south may think better of an attack. Should the inu fail my tests...you will be the first to die. In testing them, I test you as well."

The demoness walked over, pulling a small white feather from her wing. She set it on Sairex's chest, just above his heart. The feather flared with a brilliant golden light before sinking into his flesh. Sairex let out a pained hiss as it vanished.

"Is your faith in your friends so strong, Sairexannaras, that you would risk yourself for them? You trust yourself to what they may do when pushed to the extreme, as I test their mettle and their soul?"

"Yes. I have faith in them. So did Shirizu. You know she had feelings for Toga. We both know why she would not allow him to court her, she could not reveal what she was. But if it had been otherwise..."

"My sister made several decisions which I could not agree with. But yes. I know. It is one of the other reasons I consider this." The demoness paused, her tone lightening slightly. "Raven...you are dying with or without my assistance in the matter. I will not need to kill you."

"I know. I cannot...physically keep up with this battle. It may be better to die and save my soul than lose it in sustained combat. Will you...pass along a message for me?"

The demoness paused for a long moment before kneeling over him and bending down, brushing her lips to his forehead. Sairex stiffened as a flood of white light seared into him from the contact, burning through his veins and into his mind. The feeling slowly subsided, although he could still sense another presence in his mind. This one was bright and shining, wholly unlike Karalichala's darkness. "I will pass no message, raven. I have instead granted you my aid in your struggle. You no longer fight alone. You will survive, and you will heal. Now rest. You are badly drained and exhausted. Whatever magics you worked...you overextended yourself foolishly."

"I knew I was giving my life to save that of the one I love. I only prayed it would not fail. It did not."

"I am glad. You will recover. I hope you are right, in regards to your friends..."

Sairex smiled faintly. "I trust in them. Thank you, Aziraphe." With a sigh, the raven finally succumbed to exhaustion.

------------------------------------------------------------------

A/N - Aziraphe is a heron demoness. Based off a snowy egret, to be more precise. They're quite pretty birds, really. The whole thing here is...Shirizu, the northern lord, was mentioned to be a bird demoness although no one knew much else, not even what manner of bird. She was actually one of these heron demons in disguise. In disguise because her little clan was in hiding from their enemies, and should she be revealed for what she was, they would realize that some of that clan still lived and it may bring about the death of her people. Sairex's clan were enemies with the herons, as the herons were pretty much their polar opposites. Where the ravens of his tribe practiced curses and necromancy, the herons were healers and whatnot. Aziraphe is Shirizu's sister.

And yes, Sairex was going to die. He drained too much of his energy with the whole wind-tunnel thing. That aside, he may have died anyways. Karalichala was ripping him up and his body just couldn't take much more.


	85. Chapter 84

Pride (In the Name of Love) 84 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Rawr.

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"Alright, you mangy mutt!" Inuyasha let out a surprised yelp as he was taken off his feet in a tackle the moment he was back in his bedroom. Kouga leapt up and pointed an accusatory finger at him. "I didn't say anything cause that brother of yours woulda strung me up by my entrails, but YOU are gonna tell me what the hell happened, and don't even TRY to play dumb with me!"

"If I played smart, you wouldn't be able to follow, ya scrawny wolf!" Inuyasha scrambled to his feet and gave a little growl in Kouga's direction. He hopped out of the way when Kouga lashed at him and then reversed direction, delivering a sharp open-handed slap to the wolf's face. "Hah!"

"Why you bitch!..." Kouga growled and lunged forward, arms wide to catch the hanyou around the waist. Inuyasha went flying backwards, although this time he hit the bed. The two of them tumbled and ended up smacking hard against the wall in a tangled pile.

Kouga yelped when Inuyasha's fingers snagged his tail as he tried to retreat. "HEY! I don't go around tryin' to pull your ears off, watch the tail!"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes as he righted himself, debating about the tail in his hand. He decided to be merciful and let it go, allowing Kouga to sit up properly too. They both sat with legs folded beneath them, facing each other. Inuyasha was unable to keep a wide grin from his face. "You don't know what I stumbled into, wolf..."

"I'm hoping you intend to tell me," Kouga mumbled, making a much larger production than necessary of caring for his 'poor tail'.

"Y'know how we were pretty damn sure there was somethin' goin' on with Sessh and my father?"

"Shit, you walked in on them?! And lived?!" Kouga's eyes widened.

Inuyasha snickered. "Didn't really mean to...I told Kagome I'd check in and make sure they didn't kill each other by dinnertime. And I didn't figure I'd be interrupting anything too vital since they were in the throne room, which is pretty public. Heh. So I walk in and find Sessh gettin' nailed. I just...I couldn't get over the sight of it. You know and I know that I've always thought he was fucking gorgeous..."

"And he is. Go on."

"But I have a real hard time picturing him being willfully submissive."

Kouga thought about it. True, there was the grudging display of token submission at breakfast that day, or on rare other occasions, but....that wasn't near the same. "Like...REALLY...submissive? Sesshoumaru?"

"Like a wanton bitch in heat, I promise. Not somethin' I was meant to see. It was funny, in some ways. Not the way he looked, that was fuckin' hot. But I meant the fact that...his brain was gone. He was entirely fried. He didn't even know I was there until I was right in front of him."

"Your old man's that good, eh? What the hell possessed you to risk your neck goin' over there?"

"Believe me, I'm not as stupid as you like to think I am. I was gonna make good my escape but my father had a bit more of his wits about him, it would seem. Instead of like...killing me with his eyes or even getting pissed, he invited me to come play."

"No shit? And you, ya damn pervert, that's why I smell Sesshoumaru...and you...all over you."

"Me, the pervert? Hardly."

"Bullshit, the monk rubbed off on you. Maybe in more ways than one, who knows how you two entertained yourselves when you'd leave my den and go home..."

Inuyasha growled. "Miroku and I never did anythi--...yeah. We never did anything, fleabait!"

Kouga arched an eyebrow. "Somehow, your hesitance and need to correct yourself says otherwise."

"The fucker kissed me and ... he's good at it. Because of some stupid game the girls made us play."

Kouga snickered. "I see. He better than I am?"

"Hate to break it to ya, but yeah."

Kouga looked offended, his tail starting to bristle. "Oh, is that what you think, dog-face?"

"Maybe it is. What, don't like a human horning in on your territory?"

Kouga paused, not sure what to do and waging a brief internal war. "Keh, thats one human thats off-limits anyway..."

Inuyasha scowled at Kouga's abrupt indecision before lunging forward, flattening the surprised wolf on his back and pinning him down. He had a weight advantage and the advantage of surprise, so Kouga was officially stuck no matter how he squirmed.

"Get off me, mutt!"

"Oh shut up. I've been thinkin' about a lot of shit lately, now that I've had time to think without constantly having to watch my back and everyone else's. For the better part of four years we've had some sort of...fuck, I don't know what to call what we've had."

Kouga squirmed uneasily for a moment before stilling - Inuyasha had his full attention now.

"I know we were apart as much as we weren't, but I still thought about you a lot. And I left the monk to fend for himself and come see you a lot more than was really necessary to...y'know, check up on you and shit. But let's be fuckin' honest. We both know it was for more than that."

Kouga swallowed uneasily. He wasn't sure if he did or didn't like where this was going. This was something he had studiously tried to ignore. "Yasha, don't...don't complicate things. Just shut up and it'll be okay...." he mumbled finally.

Inuyasha's ears flattened and he made absolutely no move to stop or let Kouga up. "No, I'm not gonna just accept things like they are anymore. Or am I really just a fuckbuddy for you? Answer me, wolf...!"

Kouga scowled. "It's not like that and you know it."

"Then what IS it like? What am I to you, damn it?"

The wolf prince was silent for a long moment before giving Inuyasha a somewhat pleading look. The look vaporized, however, when he was the victim of an angry and none-too-gentle kiss. He felt his lip split when it was crushed against a fang and the tiny rush of blood served to make his head swim, especially when he nipped at Inuyasha in retaliation and the blood was no longer just his own.

As abruptly as it started, Inuyasha pulled his head back, his voice rough but firm. "I'm tired of waiting on you to figure out what it is you want, wolf."

Kouga's eyes widened. Was the hanyou actually going to leave him? Not that they were entirely together, but...

"I'm deciding for you. I've gotten over my fears of commitment and grown up a lot doing what I've had to do lately. So fuck it. I'm claiming you as mine. I want you for my mate. Don't expect me to say it twice, but that's how it is."

Kouga stared. "But you...you can't just...hey, why do YOU get to claim ME?!"

"Because I'm usually on top and you're my bitch, that's why. And you haven't done anything but try to hide our relationship."

"The elders--"

"Will be happy as can be about it, if you put the right spin on it. I've learned a few things from Sessh and my old man while I've been here. Half this fuckin' political game is in how you present it, not what you are actually presenting. So it's like this. Your elders will have a bitch fit if you just tell em you're gonna mate someone outside of the pack, especially a male. They'll whine about you not givin' em cubs and that you're abandoning your duties and blah blah blah. But it's really like this. Leadership of your wolf pack isn't hereditary. You could have a million cubs and it wouldn't mean any one of them would be the leader after you."

"Yeah...I know all this. It's exactly the problem, they'll be PISSED tha--"

"Shut up. I'm not done. Instead of presenting it THAT way, you have to present it properly, ya see. You aren't JUST mating someone outside of the pack. You're mating and becoming family to the House of the Inu no Taisho. I'll do whatever stupid fucking ceremony they think is necessary and I'm sure my father will help."

Kouga's eyes lit up. "Shit...didn't think about that..."

"I wonder sometimes if you think at all," the hanyou responded with a smirk before leaning down and giving his wolf a much more thorough kiss. "I do...have to tell ya, though..." he finally murmured.

"Yeah? You talk a bit too damn much..."

"Why, got a tent in your skirt and it just won't go away?"

"It's not a skirt, asshole..."

"Oh, shut up. I just...I want to make sure you know that I probably still will mess around a bit at least as far as Sessh is concerned, should the situation present itself."

Kouga snorted. "I expect nothing less. Just invite me once in a while."

Inuyasha smirked. "Eh, my brother DOES like that damn fluffy thing he carts around...he'd probably like your tail too."

"Hah, this means he's my brother too now..."

Inuyasha snickered. "It'll be fun telling him. Oh. Er...keep your trap shut about him and the old man, though. I know you don't care any more than I do but a lot of people would and we don't need to cause em any trouble."

"Alright, alright. Will you shut up and kiss me now?"

Inuyasha snickered before leaning in to comply, though a mere kiss was not all he had on his mind.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku smiled fondly at the tiny, sleeping form in his arms. Sairex's daughter was adorable. Cute little pointy ears, tiny little claws, and adorable little downy black wings. She had black hair and, on the rare occasion the monk could coax her into opening them, bright yellow eyes just like her father.

"You know, I never expected that my first child wouldn't actually be my own."

The sleepy baby shifted ever so slightly but otherwise gave him no response - not that he was expecting one, really.

"But...I will love you anyway, just as I love your father. If you'll have me, I'll happily be your other parent as long as I live." Miroku waited for a moment before breaking into a smile. "No protests? Alright, then, I'll take it as your approval. Your father will be up to see you as soon as he's better...which had best be soon. I get lonely by myself, now that I'm used to having people around. I end up doing silly things, like holding conversations with adorable young ladies such as yourself."

Miroku couldn't help but smile. He had always loved children, and this warm and sleepy little life in his arms...well, it may as well have been his own. He couldn't have loved her any more. It was only with extreme reluctance but a knowledge that exhaustion would knock him out if he didn't tend it that he put the baby back in her crib and made his way to his own room to get some much-needed sleep.


	86. Chapter 85

Pride (In the Name of Love) 85 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wrote and posted a brand new sidestory yesterday. "All my Life to Sacrifice". Starring Sesshy and Toga back in the day when Izayoi (Inuyasha's mom) came on the scene. Also has some Pride-version Sesshy characterization. Go on, check it out...you can find it under my profile.

This chapter is a little short cause I got home late today. _ Tomorrow's might be a bit late cause I might be going out....blah blah, life happens, etc etc. LOL. But since I got an extra 13 page story out for y'all yesterday, I don't feel too badly about skimping on this one.

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The village was burning. In some ways, it made Naraku gleeful. He had finally had enough of this...this ridiculous farce he was participating in. He had rampaged through the village and fought the humans off with frightening ease. He pillaged and plundered and destroyed whatever he could not use.

Why, then, was he so discontent? His mind was screaming at him angrily for giving in to his desire to act like a bandit, although he could not fathom why he found the idea so despicable. He did not morally object to anything he had done...so why should it seem so wrong?

Cursing angrily, he kicked at the horse he had taken. He wanted answers....but where to get them?

Naraku picked a random direction and rode. Perhaps the next village would prove to be less...maddening. For sure, he would not be caught dead in a damned field again...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Aziraphe eyed Toga and Sesshoumaru warily. The two of them were asleep and looked relatively content. But despite the barrier rendering her invisible and hiding her scent, if she got too close to the bed, Toga's body would start to stiffen reflexively.

She let out an exhausted mental sigh. So far, her examination had turned up dozens of surprising twists, most of which worked in the inu's favor. All the places she had visited within Toga's borders had shown civilization in various degrees of wealth...but there were no broken-down slums or impoverished communities begging for food. There seemed to be no major demon threats anywhere even close to the borders either - none of the demons dared risk challenging the Inu no Taisho or his sons!

While not all the people had much direct contact with Toga or his House, she had been unable to find any but a single community that had any enmity for their inu overlord. Intrigued that she finally had a lead, the heron demoness had questioned the lord. The cause for their hatred for Toga had stemmed from the fact that they had been successful slave traders, but when the inu clan had found out about their trade, they had shut them down, harshly, and left them barely with the means to survive.

Aziraphe learned, too, that Sairex had been right. Toga and Sesshoumaru both would crush any rebellion within their borders, but neither had tried to expand their lands. They were content with what they had. Border relations had been more or less peaceful on all fronts.

The heron turned her attentions more towards the castle itself. She found, to her shock, that the inu patriarch treated those that lived with him as his equals. He took meals with his hanyou son and, even more amazingly, a human girl, a priestess, and a monk!

Aziraphe had been a bit surprised to realize that she recognized the monk and Toga's hanyou son, albeit distantly. Rumors of the duo and their demon slaying of the past few years had spread far and wide. And was this priestess really the Shikon miko? Astonishing....

In the basement she had run across a mutated fox kit. This child was the one that had accidently gotten into things, then. Aziraphe took to her knees and murmured softly. Her hands glowed with a soft white-blue light as she slowly began purging Shippo's system of the potion. It took far more work than she had thought it would, but it was worth it to see the adorable creature back to himself and breathing easily. Come morning, she would have his friends release him.

The first one Aziraphe had chosen to look into was Rin. It was easy for her to see the devotion in the young female's eyes. The girl was very expressive and open. Her mind was as much an open book as her personality, although it failed to provide Aziraphe with any deep insight. This girl was utterly smitten with Sesshoumaru. She loved him and worshiped him. Simply because her opinion was so unbrokenly pure, however, Rin was largely out of the running as a source for information. She would be too biased.

Aziraphe had almost gotten herself caught when she had slowly slid herself into the human monk's dreams. Sairex's mate...she had about enough time to realize that he was truly good at heart right before she backed out of his mind as if all the hounds of hell were on her heels. Was it even POSSIBLE for one mortal to have such lecherous thoughts?!

Cheeks still flaming, the heron demoness had sighed and decided to attempt the most complex part of her task. She would need to test both Sesshoumaru and Toga. She would do so in dreams - she did not wish to cause them any genuine suffering.

She decided to test Sesshoumaru first, figuring the younger of the two would be easier. Cautiously she had approached him and sent out delicate feelers into his mind. The turmoil there had made her recoil sharply. The poor pup was recovering from severe trauma and his mind was still a twisted, tangled knot of chaos. // A dream may be disastrous to one with a psyche so unstable...the poor thing. How long has he suffered?...//

And so...that left Toga...and put her in her current predicament. He had gone to bed and snuggled up contentedly with Sesshoumaru. Despite the fact that he was obviously resting fairly peacefully, she couldn't get close. Even in sleep, his senses were acute and on a hair-trigger. Aziraphe had the feeling that if he was awake this would have been easier. He would have dismissed the tickling at his sixth sense as nothing if his eyes and nose and ears could not confirm a presence.

// If only there was a way I could convince you I am not here to bring you harm...but if you know I am here, it may affect the validity of my test. Perhaps if I put him more deeply to sleep? //

Aziraphe slid closer to Toga. She noticed when he tensed, but she continued her slow approach. She needed to touch him to work her spell. Then hopefully his mind would relax along with his body and she could get on with things. It seemed to be almost a formality now, really...all evidence spoke in his favor.

She continued to move with infinite slowness, relaxing every time Toga tensed up too much. She was close...only another couple feet and then she could lay his mind to rest.

The heron demoness had made few mistakes in her life and with her craft. She was a healer, primarily, and on the side she could manipulate dreams or interpret them. She knew several ways to soothe the injured, to relax a body or mind that they may rest better.

She made a dreadful mistake then, and everything happened at once.

Just as her fingers brushed against Toga's skin and she murmured her spell, he flew awake. His hand shot out automatically to snatch up Sounga. However...her spell had taken some effect. His mind, his willpower, was lulled into a more relaxed state...and Sounga seized the opportunity to lock it down and take him over. Toga's roar was truly vicious and feral, but he couldn't seem to get himself under enough control to beat back the hellish sword's power.

Sesshoumaru stumbled backwards in sleepy shock as Toga jerked upright and roared. He struggled to figure out what was going on, and his confusion gave way to alarm when he caught a glimpse of his sire's eyes, crazed and glowing crimson. "M...my Lord Father?"

Toga lunged forward, Sounga leading the way. Sesshoumaru dropped back, letting himself fall right off the bed rather than be sliced in half. "What...?!"

// KILL! GIVE ME BLOOD! //

Toga snarled viciously as he mentally beat at himself, fighting off Sounga's will. // DAMN it, what's WRONG with me?! //

Aziraphe was horrified. // What have I done?! That sword...what...?! //

// Foolish inu...the spindly wretch whom gave me back to you underestimated the strength of your will...but now that I have overcome you, I will keep you chained. // Even as the sword spoke to Toga's mind, thin dark tendrils slithered from the hilt and coiled up Toga's arm before burying themselves into his skin, digging into his flesh.

Sesshoumaru's eyes got even wider. Could...Sounga could not POSSIBLY be taking over his Lord Father...Toga had held the thing dormant for gods only knew how long, how could it suddenly be so strong?!

Toga howled as the tendrils burrowed further into his body, working their way up through his chest. He felt a numbing, piercing ache as they drove upwards....and bit into his brain. His senses dulled and abruptly, he felt as though he was watching from afar as his body moved on its own accord.

// It seems this Jormandar is good for something after all. You are mine at last, Inu, and I will make you regret ever caging me. For far too long, you have held me in check...and now I will paint your castle red with the blood of all those you love.//

Sesshoumaru saw the blank look in Toga's crimson eyes, and his alarm grew as thin trickles of blood started flowing from his ears. And then he did not have time to worry, for he was in a desperate battle for his life.


	87. Chapter 86

Pride (In the Name of Love) 86 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Scrolling down is your friend.

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Everyone woke up. Nothing of interest happened. They had a peaceful, boring day, and then went to sleep, snuggly and happy with their respective mates.

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I don't know about you guys...but much as they might like it, I think it loses something in the action department.

This is why they can never have a normal day.

Sorry, I really can't resist screwing with you guys sometimes...

ON WITH THE SHOW!

Chapter 86 / ??

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Inuyasha jolted awake with an angry grumble as the sound of wolf howls split the night. Kouga blinked awake too. Inuyasha held up a hand as he yanked his pants on and snatched up his sword. "Lemme guess. My brother still hasn't washed the target off his ass and something has the balls to actually attack my father's room?"

Kouga smirked. "Pretty much, yeah. Seems everyone is out to get a piece of Sesshoumaru. And I don't mean that in the happy-fun way in most cases."

Inuyasha snorted and was out the door in a couple quick leaps. He heard the sound of crashing and vicious snarling, and wasted no time in bounding through the door. He wasn't at all prepared for what he saw.

Sesshoumaru was scrambling around the room rather desperately, dodging as Toga lunged at him with wicked, rapid strikes of his sword. Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he felt a moment of sheer horror as he took a look at his father, eyes blazing crimson and crazed, hair flying as he lunged. Sesshoumaru was covered with cuts, although most of them weren't serious. He had his light whip at the ready, but was hesitant to use it. He was otherwise unarmed.

"What the FUCK is going on?"

Toga's gaze jerked to seek out the source of this new sound. Sesshoumaru was proving to be an incredibly annoying opponent. Despite being weaponless he was almost impossible to hit. THIS one, though...!

"INUYASHA, MOVE!" Sesshoumaru shot across the room and tackled the hanyou right before he lost his head to a sudden darting attack. Sounga came slicing around for a second swing, and Sesshoumaru flinched in anticipation of feeling the nasty blade sink into his unprotected back.

Instead, there was an angry snarl and a horrible grating noise. Sounga slashed out again, again colliding with the barrier that had suddenly sprang up around them.

Inuyasha was still trying to catch his brain up with what was going on as he scrambled to his feet. // Why the...wait...// He whipped his gaze to his brother, who had stood and was examining the barrier cautiously. "You....you just saved my life. Even though it could have cost you."

"This is not the time to discuss it, Inuyasha..." Sesshoumaru murmured, his eyes glancing back towards Toga, who was pacing the length of the barrier and growling angrily.

"So now what do we do? We can't just kill him."

Sesshoumaru whirled on Inuyasha, fangs bared in an angry growl. "I will die by his hand before I kill him, and you will die by mine should you try."

"Relax, jeez...I have no intention of trying. So how is it you're still kickin' if he's as good as they say? He's fuckin' fast, Sessh...and looks like he's pretty good at this swordplay thing."

"That is not his fighting style, and only a fraction of what he can do strength or speed-wise. At my best, I am absolutely no match for our Lord Father. He is fighting within himself to not fight, else we would all be dead by now. I do not know what occurred to allow Sounga to suppress his will...nor do I understand where this barrier came from."

"That...was me."

Both the brothers whipped around, eyes focusing on Aziraphe as she dropped her shield. Her head was bowed and tears were in her eyes. "I...I am so sorry..."

Sesshoumaru's growl was dangerous. "You will tell this Sesshoumaru who you are and what you have done...and how you got in here. Unless the wolves and the monk and the raven all are entirely useless as guards..."

The heron held up one hand. "Please, forgive me...this...I did not know. I never intended to cause you any trouble. I am Aziraphe. I am here because Sairexannaras called me here. He allowed me entry, and that is how I evaded your guards. As for what I have done..." Aziraphe sighed. "I am sister to the former Lady of the North, Shirizu. I decided to observe and judge to see if I should assist you and your kingdom or not. I would not had I found you to be too wicked. Things went wrong, however..."

"Obviously..." Sesshoumaru spat out in an acidic tone as Toga attempted another slash at the barrier with Sounga.

"I merely attempted to calm his mind and put him into a deeper sleep, that I might look into his dreams without being noticed. I was...unaware....he was suppressing an evil artifact else I would not have interfered, please believe me..."

"Well, what do we do about it, then?" Inuyasha snapped. "Look, lady, I'm sure you didn't mean any harm, but you might have just made bad of the most powerful damn demon in the fuckin' world. If he gets any worse, we're in serious trouble. This whole war and everything is NOTHIN' compared to what my father can do, and I'm not just sayin' that out of any sense of familial pride or whatnot."

Sesshoumaru appeared lost in thought. "I do not suppose you can reverse what you have done?"

Aziraphe sighed. "No. All I did was attempt to put him in a deeper sleep. Normally, this would cause him to...well. Simply sleep more deeply, dream more vividly, and wake up very well rested. It was not intended to damage in any fashion."

Inuyasha frowned. "Shit, he's bleeding. You hit him with anything, Sessh?"

"No. After Sounga took him, it began. I do not know what damage the sword is causing him, but we must find a way to remove it. Quickly." // I can not lose him again... // "Inuyasha...go get the monk and the priestess. Between them we may be able to seal him in the room. It does not solve the problem, but at least he won't run around causing havoc."

"Yeah, alright...but do you really think Miroku and Kagome even HAVE seals strong enough for our father?"

Sesshoumaru considered it for a while before nodding. "In general, I would say no...but as he is fighting the will of the sword and thus understands that it prevents him from hurting those he cares for...I believe it will be enough to suppress him. Any effort the sword makes to break through should be sabotaged."

"Alright...I'll go get 'em..." Inuyasha made his way out the back of the barrier and through the doorway. Sesshoumaru sighed as he watched Toga pacing back and forth, his heart aching at his own helplessness.

Aziraphe sighed sadly. // Well, it accomplishes my goal of testing him...but it is so much more vicious and horrible than ever I intended. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

// Curse you, you wretched demon...submit to me! //

Toga growled mentally, still struggling viciously against Sounga's dominance. He knew he should have been further subjugated than he had been - Sounga had been surprised to find he had any coherence left at all, let alone enough to fight back. Toga's heart had almost stopped in horror and worry with every slash he made at Sesshoumaru, praying to all the powers that be that he wouldn't score a solid hit on his beloved pup. Thankfully, Sesshoumaru was fast enough to stay a step ahead of him so long as he forced every mote of his being into holding Sounga back from utilizing his body to it's capacity.

Sounga was viciously enraged at being thwarted in any capacity. Everything was still for a moment when Inuyasha burst into the room. Sounga crowed in glee and changed targets without a moment's hesitation. Toga was absolutely stunned when Sesshoumaru shot across the room and knocked his brother out of danger. Despite his worry and his rage at the sword, Toga felt a bright burst of love and pride. He could still remember Sesshoumaru, long ago, promising to kill the very creature he had just risked his own life to save. // It seems my boys have finally reconciled...ah, even if this damned sword kills me for the second time, knowing that puts my heart at ease.//

Sesshoumaru proceeded to promise to destroy Inuyasha should Inuyasha even consider killing him. Toga groaned inwardly. // Too soon to celebrate, I suppose... //

Sounga's malevolent voice dripped like venom into his thoughts. // It is delicious, the way your sons bicker...they nearly killed each other so many times... //

// It's a terrible shame that almost doesn't count, isn't it? Just as you ALMOST have me under control. For all the good it will do you. //

// What is this barrier?! // Sounga was largely ignoring him, instead intent on trying to find a way to hurt his pups.

Toga watched from his distant mental perch as the story unfolded before him. // Shiri's sister?!...I was unaware Shirizu had a sister...interesting. //

Sounga did not find it so interesting, and was in fact rather angry. He lashed out at the barrier shielding the trio, and was repulsed. // Damn you, inu, release your hold on me! This barrier should not stop us! I can give you so much more power than you have even now. //

// Why in the blue bloody hell would I need any more power than I already have? I have all I need and all I desire. Let me go, Sounga. You can not win. //

// I have already won! Hah, the fools think some wandering monk can ward me in here? //

Toga smirked mentally. // Oh, of course not...if I wasn't fighting you, anyway. I'll let myself be exorcized entirely before I let you hurt my pups. //

// Curse you, inu! //

// Yes, yes...shut up. I grow weary of your barbaric, bloodthirsty rambling...// Toga was silent for a time, ignoring his body's angry pacing. He reached his decision with a mental growl. // As soon as I am free of this damn sword...I am going to this Black Circle and putting a stop to this. Jormandar will die for all he has done to me, all he has done to my Sesshoumaru. It is high time that we retaliate. //


	88. Chapter 87

Pride (In the Name of Love) 87 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Working on another sidestory for y'all when I'm done with this chapter, but I don't know if I'll get it out to you before I run out of time. As I am PROBABALY going away this weekend, this might be your last post until Monday. I'm uncertain as to whether or not I'll get one out for Friday because for some reason my boss felt the need to schedule me on 1st shift (7a-3p) and I have to leave that evening. (Jess is going downstate to visit her father for father's day weekend if all goes according to plan.) I should return Sunday evening, although there is no guarantee I will get a post out that night. Monday is a pretty safe bet, though, depending on if/ when I work that night...or day...or whatever.

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Sesshoumaru bit back a huff of annoyance when he felt Inuyasha staring at his back. He didn't bother to say anything, though. He simply remained where he was, watching his Sounga-possessed father angrily destroying random objects since he couldn't get past Miroku and Kagome's wards.

"Sessh?"

Sesshoumaru remained silent, which Inuyasha translated to mean 'Why yes, dear brother, please, what is it?'

"Sessh, will you...come with me for a minute? I...want to talk to you. 'Sides, you shouldn't stay so close, where that damn sword can see you. It's almost like you're taunting it, and the extra strain on fighting it off isn't something father needs."

The taiyoukai growled low in his throat but didn't argue the point. "Very well." He made a small gesture with his hand, indicating for Inuyasha to go wherever it was that he was going. Inuyasha took off down the hallway, and Sesshoumaru followed him. It wasn't like he had any real doubt as to what the hanyou wanted to talk about, even if he couldn't claim to be overly eager to discuss it himself.

Inuyasha took him to a nearby sitting room and flopped onto his back onto a divan. Sesshoumaru settled much more gracefully on a matching piece of furniture opposite his brother and eyed him wordlessly.

The hanyou was silent for a long moment, simply returning his gaze. Sesshoumaru finally broke the silence.

"Generally, when one wishes to speak to another, words are involved."

Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he gave Sesshoumaru a not-very-heartfelt glare. "Keh...and you call ME impatient. I just...I wanted to thank you for saving me."

"Hn. Your gratitude is unnecessary but duly noted."

"You risked your own life...or at least some pretty nasty injuries...to save me."

Sesshoumaru resisted the urge to squirm. The truth was, he had been almost as surprised as Inuyasha had when he found himself flying across the room to protect his younger brother, even if it meant damage to himself. He had tried to rationalize it in his uneasy mind that his father would have been very upset, when he got free of Sounga, if Sesshoumaru had let him kill his younger son.

Then, of course, there was always the fact that Inuyasha had saved his life. More than once, it would seem. So he owed the hanyou, he couldn't very well run around indebted to him...!

But that wasn't the whole truth, was it?... No, try as he might to come up with some excuse, Sesshoumaru knew the heart of the matter. // I did not wish to see you die, little brother. Somewhere along the line you got past my defenses and worked your way into my heart. //

Of course, Sesshoumaru wasn't about to say these things...dear gods, no.

"You could have let him kill me. Then you would have been rid of my half-demon taint without having actually done a thing yourself, so you couldn't have really been blamed."

Sesshoumaru scowled darkly, speaking before he could think to stop himself. "What sort of monster do you think this Sesshoumaru is? I do not desire your death any longer, Inuyasha. The blood of my Lord Father flows through your veins, and no matter how I despise your human ancestry or how frustrating your human morals and conventions can be at times, that fact alone makes you worthy of this House. I am no better. Only half of my blood is my Lord Father' other, while still the blood of a demoness of noble birth, is foul and disgraceful. We are not so different."

Inuyasha practically fell off the divan in shock, sitting up to stare at Sesshoumaru, uncertain that he had heard him correctly. He could accept that Sesshoumaru really didn't want to see him dead. After all, the two of them had reconciled most of their differences and had even grown to enjoy each other's company. That he could understand. But to hear Sesshoumaru say that they were no different? Wasn't the difference between them the biggest argument Sesshoumaru had ever held over him? A shame to the family line because of his mother?

Inuyasha jerked his mental train of thought to a screeching halt. Come to think of it...he had never heard Sesshoumaru mention his own mother. Ever. In fact, he had never even given it much thought...although he did now. His mother had to have been an inu demoness...and would have been under his father's protection. Toga had been dead for a couple hundred years, but still...Sesshoumaru's mother wouldn't have died of age and was likely strong enough not to fall prey to most demons.

And yet....there was no trace that there had ever been such a female in this castle. Inuyasha had learned that some of the rooms - in fact, one that Rin currently inhabited - were redecorated as they were specifically for his mother and had not been changed. So why would Sesshoumaru's mother have no trace remaining of her in the castle? // She had to have died...else why would the old man have taken another mate in the first place? I never even thought about it. But what's with Sessh's attitude about her? // Inuyasha spoke before he could think about what he was saying. "So was there some bad blood between you and your mother before she died?"

Sesshoumaru froze and then slowly turned to look at Inuyasha, his expression unreadable. "My mother is alive."

Inuyasha blinked. // Alive? But...then why... I can't say I know the guy all that well, but our father doesn't seem the sort to cheat or...well, NOT stick with a mate. It'd be a matter of honor, and he has a shitload of THAT... // "I don't understand."

Sesshoumaru's expression was guarded, but his tone was bitter and threatening to crack. "She was a conniving, wretched whore that was using my Lord Father for his wealth, lands, and power. He loved her and thought she loved him, else he may have seen it sooner. When he discovered her treachery, he threw her out after I was born."

Inuyasha frowned - he hadn't meant to bring up such a sensitive subject. "I...I'm sorry, I didn't know..."

Sesshoumaru smiled, but there was no humor in it. "We are not so different, little brother. You had no father, I had no mother. Both of us with tainted blood, no matter the species."

"Stop. Don't...I know things didn't work out good for you, and I'm sorry, but my mother took care of me. I loved her. I don't consider my blood to be 'tainted' because of her. After all, she's a big part of why I am who I am. So...I mean...I know you don't like humans and stuff, but please...at least don't say things about her like that to my face."

Sesshoumaru paused, and then nodded slightly. It seemed the taiyoukai was just full of surprises. "My apologies. I did not...actually intend it as an insult. It is more...habit than anything. I will not pretend a fondness for your mother...but I will respect your own."

"What's gotten into YOU?"

"I do not understand what you mean."

"This isn't like you....you're being...nice and emotional and...and..."

Sesshoumaru frowned. // Well, this is what happens when you try to let people past the front you put up...disbelief and ridicule. How can the mighty Lord Sesshoumaru have emotions or things that trouble him and eat at his heart? // "Shut up." Abruptly he stood and headed towards the door.

Inuyasha leapt to his feet to intercept him. "Sessh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you, I just...it's nice to be able to talk to you and have you be so...honest. I've had the feeling for a long time that there is a lot more to you than what people see and I'd like to know more."

Sesshoumaru stared at his brother, trying to decide how to proceed. He finally settled on a disdainful look. "Hn. No, this Sesshoumaru is quite transparent. Nothing matters but power and I care for no one but myself. The fact that my lands have prospered in my Lord Father's absence is a complete fluke. Nothing bothers me, nothing upsets me, I have no skeletons in my closet. I have no feelings and my heart is frozen. I am cold, ruthless, and uncaring."

"Sessh..." Inuyasha frowned, feeling rather guilty. Well, yeah, he had pretty much assumed that all of those things were true for a long time. But damn it, he didn't think that way anymore! "You damn well know that's unfair. Everyone else might think like that, and I used to...but ever since I pulled you out of that damn dungeon and we got the chance to spend time together, I changed my opinion."

"Hn. You are in my way. Move."

"No."

Sesshoumaru growled softly. "Inuyasha, hear you this. Even if I accept your apology and even if I desire to allow you to get to know me better, now is not the time. I am not growing angry at you solely for your words or your current decisions. I am very stressed, as there is a grave issue with my Lord Father. This could very well be the death of him, and that is not something I can...that is not something I desire to face again. Something must be done, and sitting in here talking with you, no matter the topic, is not accomplishing a thing. I have much to do and have to try to figure this out... so ... MOVE."

Inuyasha blinked and then nodded slowly, sliding out of the way. He watched Sesshoumaru stalk out of the room with a heavy sigh. He had heard his near-slip. // Not something he can take, is it...I'd imagine not. I know how much the old man means to him, their new relationship aside. Fuck, it must have tore him to pieces when he died the first time. To think he might have to go through that again...but fuck that. I won't let it happen. We've beaten that damn sword before, we'll do it again. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku glanced out the window and saw the sun cresting the horizon. // Morning already. Hm. // He made his way towards the dungeon. Yes, he was exhausted...but that didn't change anything. He would sleep better if he checked in on Sairex first.

To his surprise, Sairex was sprawled out on his bed, limbs and wings askew. His arm had been healed from its break. // Probably from the heron demoness... // The simple fact that Sairex was sleeping, however, alarmed the monk. The raven had told him before that he couldn't rest until he beat Karalichala once and for all, else she would be able to overpower him.

"Sairex!" the monk yelled in alarm, rather more loudly than he intended. Sleepy yellow eyes blinked open and Sairex turned to peer fuzzily at him.

"Miroku? Vhat is it?"

"You're alright...thank Buddha for that...You...said you couldn't sleep or...or she'd get to take you over."

Sairex smiled and sat up, making his way over to the bars and taking Miroku's hand with a smile. "Mm. Da fight is over and I have von. Vhenever Toga zees fit, you can let me out of 'ere."

Miroku's eyes lit up. "Really? You're sure?"

"Yes. Zhe has been zubdued and absorbed."

Miroku grinned and leaned forward, giving Sairex a quick kiss. "Mm...well, I'll go get some keys and get you out of here. Lord Toga is...er... a bit incapacitated at the moment, I'll explain in a few. I'm...eager to hold you and get some proper rest myself. It's been quite lonely."

Sairex nodded. "Of course."

Miroku hurried off and came back with the keys. "There's a lot I need to fill you in on. Oh...and I talked to your daughter and she didn't protest me adopting her as my own, so things are all good on that front, too."

Sairex blinked, then chuckled. "Aliana."

Miroku arched an eyebrow and peered at the raven as he finished unlocking the door. "Mm?"

"Her name. My...our...daughter. Aliana."

"It's beautiful. I love it. Now come on...I'll fill you in on all you've missed."


	89. Chapter 88

Pride (In the Name of Love) 88 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So it looks like I managed to work a chapter into my schedule before I left for the rest of the weekend anyways, although my sidestory is giving me fits and doesn't want to come out right. I know the middle part and the end, it's just...the start. I'm not sure I like it and not sure how to change it. I'll probably post it anyways when I finish...though I can't promise it'll make it before I have to leave.

I'm starting to suspect I have less readers now than I once did...lol.. I get far less reviews these days. Sorrow. Maybe this beast has gotten too big?...Maybe my craziness has driven y'all away....

So hey...even if you don't leave a real review, I'm just curious as to how many followers this beast still has. So just give me a shout out and say hi or somethin' to let me know y'all are out there still!

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Toga heard a soft chuckle on the other side of the invisible wall of sutras that caged him. It was malevolent and wicked. Sounga was apparently curious enough too that both of them paused in their struggle against each other to look.

Aziraphe was leaning against the wall, a dark smile on her face. Toga felt the first threads of alarm, although they were heavily mixed with confusion. The heron didn't seem like she could be a wicked sort...surely Sairex would not have called her if she were?...

"Well, well...it seems everything has gone according to plan. More or less. In fact, things are working out better than I previously intended."

// What does she mean? // Sounga griped angrily.

// If I knew that, believe me, I probably wouldn't have ended up in this mess with you. // Toga growled mentally to highlight his response. His body, of course, remained silent but stared at Aziraphe, waiting for her to continue.

"Initially, my allies and I wished for the sword to take you and for you to run about and kill all you held dear yourself. Then it would simply be a matter of plucking up the souls before they reached the underworld. You yourself would have been overcome with grief or rage and ultimately ended up dead, unable to handle knowing you yourself had slaughtered your children."

// What?... // The heron had Toga's full attention, now.

"But this will probably work out even better." Aziraphe gave Toga a sweet smile. "Especially in regards to Sesshoumaru. He will make a delightful slave."

// WHAT?! // A low and dangerous growl slid from Toga's throat as a spike of protective fear and rage drove into him.

"It is a shame we could not subjugate you yourself. Your son will do, though. Perhaps even better. He is a prettier thing than you, more...delicate. Appealing to either gender. Do you know how many demons will pay well to make use of him? Simply for their own pleasure or to acquire a powerful child. Your bloodline is potent."

The volume of Toga's growl increased as his muscles began to quiver, his gaze locked on the heron demoness. His disbelief was wilting, fading in a white-hot rush of rage.

"I myself will use him. I wonder how loud I can make him scream...and how much I can make before he is too broken to be of use. Not that there is much left of him to break...but it will be delightful revenge for you causing my sister's death."

Sounga felt a sudden jolt of alarm. The continual, deadly rumble in Toga's throat was the sort of growl that began in one throat and ended in someone else's. The pure, unfettered rage at the heron demoness' words was utterly consuming him. // What?! NO! I WILL NOT LET YOU GO, DOG!! //

Sounga turned out not to have a choice. Toga let out a mighty roar, and the sword's control on him shattered. The tendrils that had woven themselves through his body were burned away in a flash of powerful demonic energy. Sounga was forced back under control despite its protests, and the angry voice silenced.

Toga was back in control of himself, and his aura flared. His eyes were liquid, crimson rage. A feral snarl tore itself from him as he leapt forward.

The taiyoukai hit the barrier and the sutras put up to contain him sizzled with energy before burning to nothingness. The barrier was dissolved. Two leaps put him within striking range of Aziraphe, and Sounga came crashing down with a vengeance, hitting her personal barrier.

All traces of malevolence had left the heron demoness' face. She blanched as she looked at the angry inu and poured everything she had into maintaining her barrier. // Perhaps I did not think this plan through very carefully....// She winced as he struck again and again, her barrier shuddering under the strain. "Lord Toga, stop!"

Her only response was another snarl, and this strike caused her barrier to crack. Aziraphe was old, and while she poured her energies into healing and protecting others, she was a powerful demoness. Right now, though, she could feel how utterly dwarfed her power was. Sairex had been right about the inu lord, it seemed. His power was terrifying.

"Lord Toga, please, stop...I would never do any of those things, I swear it on my sister's grave!"

Toga's words were so infused with anger that his growl was difficult to translate. "You would say anything to save your hide now, wouldn't you..."

"I had to get you free of that sword! Please, believe me...I am a healer, I would never hurt ANYONE, especially not like that!"

Toga growled but held his next strike. He was sure he could blast through the barrier this time. He was not sure if her words were truth or lie, but her fear was evident.

"I will take down my barrier and give myself over to your mercies, Lord Toga...but before you destroy me in a fit of rage....please. Speak with your eldest son. He is in the study, I believe, attempting to find a way to rouse you enough to free you of the blade. I... I didn't really think this through. I had no idea it would...work so well."

Toga forced down the powerful flame of his rage and made himself calm down. Slowly the red faded from his eyes...mostly. A few faint sparks still danced in their golden depths, however...crimson glimmers shimmering just beneath the surface.

Aziraphe stood slowly and then released her barrier. She half expected to feel the bite of Sounga tearing her into pieces despite Toga's impressive control. She found her wrist grabbed abruptly and she was practically drug down the hallway.

Sesshoumaru leapt to his feet as his father smashed the door open to his study and drug Aziraphe in. The younger taiyoukai bit back his instinctual reaction to immediately display his submission and back off. He could not remember the last time he had seen his father quite so angry. However, despite the rage...his father looked coherent. "My...Lord Father?..."

"Sesshoumaru, validate this creature's story, else I shall cut her down here and now."

Sesshoumaru turned a surprised look to Aziraphe. "I see you did as you said, however, you neglected to tell this Sesshoumaru what your plan would entail...although I now understand why you assumed it may be fatal." Sesshoumaru turned his gaze to Toga. "She came in here a short time ago and left me a scroll to deliver to the late Lady Shirizu's chief advisor in the event of her demise. She stated she had an idea how to rouse you enough that you would overpower Sounga despite Jormandar's additions, but feared it may cost her her life."

Toga squinted at the heron suspiciously before slowly releasing his hold on her wrist. She gave him a somewhat dark look and rubbed at it ruefully, then sighed. "I apologize, Lord Toga, deeply and truly. I had no wish to utter such terrible things and no desire to cause you such ill feelings...but I owed it to you to free you from that hellish blade after I caused it's rise in the first place."

The inu patriarch squinted at her for a long moment before nodding slowly. He truly could not sense any malevolence in her. "Very well...I apologize if I am not appropriately grateful."

Aziraphe nodded. "I have learned all I need to know. I shall prevent the north from joining in the coming war. Perhaps we will speak of further alliance in the future."

Toga nodded stiffly. "Leave me."

Aziraphe did not protest, nor was she offended at his less than properly diplomatic treatment of her. She could fully understand why he didn't really want to see her or talk to her at the moment. Possession aside, she had stirred some dark things up inside him with her words. Truly, she felt terrible for it...but she figured he would get over it in time.

The moment she left, Toga pitched Sounga to the floor and jerked Sesshoumaru to him in an almost bone-crushing hug, closing his eyes. Sesshoumaru blinked several times, barely biting back the involuntary noise of surprise that tried to escape itself from him at the unexpected embrace. "My Lord Father...?"

"Hush." Toga sighed softly, nuzzling his face into Sesshoumaru's silky hair, allowing the scent to calm him down. His nerves were still jangling and demanding action, demanding he protect his pup from these horrible things Aziraphe had mentioned. Even though he knew, logically, that the threat did not exist from her...that did not mean the threat did not exist. He hated the thought of it. Also, there was the fact that he could still smell Sesshoumaru's blood, still see the dozens of cuts he had, himself, inflicted. While he knew it wasn't entirely his own fault and that Sesshoumaru surely did not blame him, it did not lessen his guilt.

Sesshoumaru rested his head against Toga's chest, aware that he probably couldn't escape even had he wanted to. It was rather nice, actually.

"I'm so sorry, my Sesshoumaru..."

"You owe me no apologies, my Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru murmured, blinking.

"I caused you harm. If you were less skilled than you are, I could have killed you."

"I am and you did not."

"That doesn't mean that I feel any better about it. It...It horrifies me, how much of a target you have become for wickedry...and that I myself played a part in the effort to strike out against you. I do not like to think of anyone bringing you harm...least of all myself."

"I do not blame you. You could not help what you did while in the grip of Sounga. Besides, I could tell you were pulling the sword back. Had you TRULY been after me, I would not be able to stand before you now."

Toga made an unhappy little growl, not wanting to even think about it. "Just...shush and let me hold you for a while."

"As you are recovered, I no longer need to remain awake and try to resolve the issue. I would be more than willing to retire for the remainder of the evening with you in more comfort than standing in the middle of the study provides."

Toga released Sesshoumaru with great reluctance. "True enough. This time I promise to try not to wake you by attempting to bisect you."

Sesshoumaru's lips twitched into a smirk. "I should hope not. There would be less of me for you to obsess over, and I'm rather fond of both my halves."

Toga snorted and picked up Sounga. He gave the blade a warning glare, but it didn't even make an attempt or a peep. "Alright...let's go to bed, then...after all, who knows what great new...experience...tomorrow will bring? It's always something..."


	90. Chapter 89

Pride (In the Name of Love) 89 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wow. It was great to hear from y'all...I got more reviews than I even expected. =D

You see, Jess LOVES reviews. It's the only payment I get for this. On an average day, I spend 2-3 hours per chapter. Admittedly, this includes some distractions and some days my muse is really speaking and I can rip it out faster. But I digress. Anyway, getting reviews makes me feel appreciated and validates the time I spend continuing to write. Yes, I write for me...to a point...but I keep my schedule as I do and am so driven because of YOU all. Your reviews remind me you are still out there, and give me the warm fuzzy happiness of knowing I have followers to work to please. So take a couple minutes out to drop me a line now and then. It makes my day. =D Every review makes a difference.

I even appreciate criticism. I understand not everyone will like everything, and I'm not perfect. If you have a valid point, or have a suggestion, or just want to chat on a more personal level about something...feel free to email me, please. I enjoy getting in touch with my audience.

This is all for you, my peeps. I love all of you that have the devotion to make it this far with me, and hope you're around for as long as this story and all the sidestories it has spawned / is spawning continue!

~ Jessi, your humble author. (or the Mighty Pharaoh Jezz-Ra, if I'm in a less humble mood. ; ) )

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"Well...are you quite finished yet?" Jormandar's dry voice slithered through his ears like a snake across gravel. Tsetsukosei scowled in annoyance before flicking his hazel-green eyes towards the dark, cloaked figure.

Jormandar's own eyes widened a bit and he let out a small chuckle, taking in the sight of Tsetsukosei's new form. He appeared almost human, save for the telltale pointed ears of a youkai. He had slitted hazel-green eyes. His hair was relatively short and spiked, a deep shade of green, save for two long and braids that swung just in front of his ears, which were tipped with yellow a few inches from their ends. "You are virtually unidentifiable from Shimaku...but will the Southern lands believe you are their lord returned?"

Tsetsukosei smirked. "They do not know the true fate of their lord. I will inform them of what REALLY happened...and then with our combined armies will deal with the dogs."

"Good, very good...just remember our agreement."

"I would not forget, Jormandar. Trust me." Tsetsukosei bowed quickly, and then was gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga looked more than a little sheepish when he and Sesshoumaru got back to his room. In his possessed rage, Toga had destroyed much of the room's priceless furniture. Sesshoumaru eyed the room, then glanced at Toga and smirked at the expression on his father's face.

"This Sesshoumaru does not understand why you look so upset. You clearly won your combat against the decor."

Toga snorted. "Very funny. At least I didn't feel the need to slice up my bed. It was quite expensive."

"Indeed, that would have been a sad occurrence."

Toga was silent for a moment before turning a much more serious gaze on Sesshoumaru. "I DID seem to feel the need, however, to slice up my puppy. While that in itself is not surprising, considering Sounga's thirst for blood...you could have likely won our combat and you refused to strike."

Sesshoumaru nodded in agreement.

"Further, you threatened your brother's life should he make any such attempt."

"And I meant it."

Toga sighed. "You do know I could never have lived with myself had I struck down either of you..."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes for a long moment. "My Lord Father...if it had come to it, I would have stopped you from killing me. I had not expected Inuyasha's interference. But even if it had meant my own death, I would not have struck you down."

"Don't be foolish, pup...you have to outlive me."

Sesshoumaru's gaze snapped to Toga so quickly that the elder inu was surprised that it did not have an audible sound. "My Lord Father...I have no desire to outlive you."

The elder inu frowned darkly. "Sesshoumaru, you are my son. No parent should outlive their child. And while I know you suffered, you survived my demise before."

"Did I?..."

Toga blinked. "Sesshoumaru..."

"I continued to function properly but the world held no meaning. I would not have cared if it all burned or dropped into the sea. When you died, I died with you."

Toga's frown deepened. "I do not wish for things to be thus. Sesshoumaru, you-"

"My Lord Father, please. With all due respect...I cannot heed this desire. Then, not even as much as now, you meant too much to me. If my devotion and this need is a weakness, I am sorry, but it is part of me. You were all I had and became all I needed. Everything else was transient, but you were always there. No one else understood, and no one else cared for me outside of an official sense, fulfilling their duty to you. My Lord Father, then or now, I have never been loved and it is a strong possibility that few even liked me. I am not like you, despite how hard I tried in my youth. You were not merely feared, but loved. You inspired loyalty. You were impossible to replace, and no matter what I tried, all I ever heard was how I was good for what I was, but I was not you. I can not open my heart to the world. I am considered cold because I cannot embrace emotions as you do, as most do. To do so grates against my sense of logic and what is right. Even if that means I was hated, am hated...I was feared and respected as well, and so I got by. Regardless...I..."

Sesshoumaru paused, swallowing hard. He hated admitting to anything that might be considered a weakness. "I cannot change this. I am...I have always been...too damaged, too fragile. I cannot cope with the world if I embrace it. I cannot risk the pains that may come with the pleasures. The damage they would bring is too extensive. It is not fear of the world, merely acceptance that it is not for one such as I. The world largely despises me. The only one that ever accepted me without condition and loved me as I was, not because of WHAT I was...was you. You would not leave me. You would not betray me. You would not expect of me more than I am able to give. And while it may seem...ridiculous...all this is who I was, who I am now. Even if this is a weakness you despise, my Lord Father...I would rather you hate me for everything I am than ever love me for something that I am not."

Toga was taken aback, his eyes widening the more Sesshoumaru spoke. Dear gods...even if he had suspected some of these things to be true, it didn't change the fact that it was difficult to hear. He had known Sesshoumaru had suffered when he was small. His pup never made mention of it and instead pasted on a stoic mask and continued about his life...but Toga had known. Something had always been gnawing at his Sesshoumaru. His pup took little joy in the world. As he had gotten older, the quietly borne and unidentifiable sadness had left Sesshoumaru. It was not hidden or buried away, it was simply gone. Toga had assumed Sesshoumaru had found an answer to something he had been looking for...it hadn't occurred to him that his pup had simply accepted things as fact, decided he did not need anything else and would not pine for things he felt he could not have...would not give in to 'useless' grief.

He alone was the exception in Sesshoumaru's life, his rock. He had always been able to draw Sesshoumaru out of his shell and always had known him in a different way than others. He had seen his pup laugh and tease and ... live. Dimly he had known that Sesshoumaru only seemed to let go of his mask in his presence...but some part of Toga had always assumed that Sesshoumaru surely must enjoy the world at times when he was not present. To think that this was not the case...that his pup truly did shut the world out entirely when he was not there to open a window into it...it brought a lump to his throat and a sharp ache to his heart. How could he have been so blind, let Sesshoumaru continue on without finding a way to FIX it?

He frowned inwardly, a deep sense of guilt gnawing at him. He hadn't fixed the problem that he didn't want to accept...because in some ways he didn't wish for it's solution. He...had enjoyed the constant presence of his pup. Sesshoumaru never got in the way but was always there to help him. He only spoke the words but a handful of times in all his life, but he always showed Toga how much he loved him. He had always stood by him. Occasionally he would disagree, surely, but when he did it was never without good reason and was ultimately for the good of the lands he knew his father loved or Toga's own personal good.

In a large sense, Sesshoumaru's whole-hearted devotion to him...his desperate love and quiet need for Toga's acceptance...the comfort he gave whether he realized it or not...his singular presence inside the wall around Sesshoumaru's heart... This was a monster he himself had been instrumental in birthing, even if he did have help. And now, how could he hope to change it? Was it even possible anymore?

In truth, some change had come already. Sesshoumaru had very slowly begun to open himself to a select few individuals and hesitantly accepted things in tiny doses. It was a very small start, but a start nonetheless. Toga held no illusions that he would be replaced as the sun for Sesshoumaru's private little world, and he didn't care to be. But he would do what he could to make sure that some faith in life itself was restored to his pup, that was for sure.

Toga sighed and pulled Sesshoumaru into his arms. "I could never do anything but love you, my Sesshoumaru. That has never changed, even if....the circumstances have changed a bit. You are more precious to me than anything. I just do not wish to have you suffer on my count."

"This Sesshoumaru suffers not."

Toga nuzzled his throat and sighed softly. He gently traced his tongue over one long and narrow cut that he knew he had inflicted himself. "I made you suffer today, and you still bear the wounds to prove it."

"They are nothing. Things ended well, despite the stress of the day." Sesshoumaru couldn't repress the tiny shiver that ran through him. His tone shifted as a small smirk flicked across his lips. "I thought you were tired..."

"I am. Very much so, in fact."

"If you do not stop licking this Sesshoumaru very soon, well...history has shown what happens each and every time such an event has occurred."

Toga smirked and then lifted Sesshoumaru up, drawing a startled gasp from the younger inu. He deposited him in bed and slid in next to him, snuggling Sesshoumaru tightly against his body before resuming his ministrations. "The difference this time is that I am entirely too exhausted. So hush and let me take care of you. Honestly. Kids these days, always so...eager..."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "Ah, I see. You cannot keep up with me."

"Generally I would be happy to put you in your place and prove you wrong, especially since that sounded suspiciously like a challenge..."

"It was."

"And I shall accept. Perhaps tomorrow. Battling Sounga takes a lot of energy."

"So does keeping ahead of you."

"You're relentless, aren't you?..." Toga smirked.

"Actually, I'm quite tired myself. However, I cannot seem to keep my thoughts very pure when you start assailing me with your tongue."

"Shall I stop, then?"

Sesshoumaru almost purred as he snuggled against Toga sleepily. "Oh, by no means...please, do not."


	91. Chapter 90

Pride (In the Name of Love) 90 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I'm so touched by your reviews, guys, seriously. It's so nice to come off a long night of work and find all these nice comments in my email box...it puts a big stupid grin on my face and makes me all "Squee!"

And I'm freakin' stoked, I finally got someone mebbe drawin' a Sairex for the Jess. =D (Thank you for your connections, Liera!!!) Hope everything works out alright on that front... Jess is still shocked that people like Sairex so much. I know I personally am not usually a fan of OC's and was hesitant to keep him in...but...*grins* Y'all seem to like him so I've kept him.

I shall be probably starting the editing process soon, so if any of my posting sites start saying "ZOMG UPDATEUPDATEUPDATE....er...beyond the once daily....then I apologize, its just edits. Mostly for spelling / grammar. I plan no major content changes. Love y'all!

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Miroku felt something was not quite right and blearily opened one eye. He squinted at the empty spot next to him in bed, then glanced over towards the desk. Sairex was very, very cautiously attempting to engrave a pendant of some sort without actually touching it. It was a rather interesting sight, although Miroku wasn't entirely sure why his lover was up before the sun working on it. "Sairex?"

Sairex jumped in surprise and let out a sharp hiss as his fingers got too close to the pendant, which flared with a bright purple light. Sairex stuck his now burnt finger in his mouth and rolled his eyes over to look at Miroku. "Mmph."

Miroku frowned as he sat up. "I'm sorry! Are y ou alright?"

Sairex glanced at his finger and smiled ruefully. "Kaa...I be fine."

"What is it, exactly, that you're trying to do? Why aren't you sleeping? You shouldn't be pushing yourself so hard."

"You zure ask a lot of questions for just vaking up. I'm trying to inscribe dis pendant vith appropriate runes. I can't touch it because...vell. It's quite holy and blessed. And I'm not zleeping because dis is more important."

"A holy pendant? Why didn't you just ask me to engrave it for you?"

"Vell...because...you zee...ah...kaa! I'm used to vorking on dis zort of ting alone. I didn't tink about it."

Miroku chuckled. "Alright, what is the purpose of inscribing this pendant?"

"I'm attempting to break da timeztream. It has to be properly inscribed as part of da zpell."

"So...you really know how to mess with time and such?"

Sairex snorted. "No. But zome tings transcend time...and I intend to find a vay. I figure if I modify vhat I know of how time vorks and other tings, I zhould eventually be able to figure zometing out."

"I see. And your attempts to render me immortal couldn't have waited for a good night's sleep?"

"I am veighing my options. I could zleep another few hours and znuggle you den, or make you ztop aging zo I alvays have you around and znuggle you forever."

Miroku couldn't help but grin. "I see."

Sairex paused and then set down his equipment, turning to look more fully at Miroku. "I... am in need of your assistance."

The monk arched an eyebrow. "Anything you want. Just...come back over here and lay down. You're exhausted, I can tell."

Sairex huffed at his bangs but finally relented, slipping back under the sheets.

"Now..." Miroku murmured, hooking his arms around the raven's slender frame. "What can I help you with?"

"Vell...I...for all da tings I do know, I don't tink I know da first ting about raising a child. How I vas raised...probably vasn't vhat vould be considered normal. Normal enough for my people, but..."

Miroku got a sinking feeling in his gut as his mind wandered. "How....were you raised?"

Sairex shrugged slightly. "I vas given to my nursemaid and zhe fed me until I could feed myzelf, made zure I found my way to my lessons, and made zure I obeyed da rules."

"Rules?"

"I could not be late, could not make a mess, and must never miss my lessons, no matter vhat zhape I vas in."

"What shape....did your parents abuse you?"

Sairex snorted. "I barely ever zaw dem until I vas old enough to learn from dem. My mother had a heavy hand and liked to claw. I zuffered a good deal before I ztarted doing extra ztudies on my own. My father..." Sairex closed his eyes. "...he nearly killed me more times dan I can count. Da males in my family vere varriors, and he refused to allow me to be anyting but. Unfortunately for us both, I took after my mother's zide."

Miroku gave Sairex a squeeze. "I'm sorry..."

"For vhat? It vas not your doing. My parents vere actually directly involved in my life, vhich vas zometing most of my clan could not claim. I got zpecial treatment because I vas to be chief and zhaman. However, it does not zit vell vith me to tink of zimply ignoring my daughter until zhe is old enough to teach. I just...don't know vhat to do. I have no idea how to care for a child."

"Well, no worries. I'll be more than happy to teach you what I know in such regards. I'm no expert myself, having never raised one...but how hard can it be?" Miroku smiled.

"Dose are vords dat zhould never be uttered, love...you just doomed us both."

"Oh, I'm sure it won't be that bad. And if we have any trouble, all we have to do is ask someone that's done it. I'm sure there are tons of people around here. I mean, we even could ask Toga. He raised Sesshoumaru." Miroku paused, and shared a long moment of silence with Sairex as both of them thought about how Sesshoumaru had turned out. "Of course, I'm sure there are lots of other options too..."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A general cry of alarm and surprise went up as the sun came up and the guards finally noticed the black-clad figure laying in the road. It was not so much the sight of a downed body - bandits were fairly common, even this close to the Southern Palace.

However, the Bandit King himself, Lord Shimaku, was not usually the one face down in the dirt.

It did not take long for the healers and Shimaku's attendants to make their way out to him. They carefully lifted him and hurried him to the healer's quarters. His wounds were grievous, his belly clawed to ribbons and his skin horribly pale from blood loss.

The South was rife with bandits and mercenaries. Life was dangerous...and Shimaku had been the most dangerous amongst them. He had clawed his way to the top of the continual struggle...lied, cheated, stolen, assassinated, tricked...in the end, none were left that dared oppose him.

Once Shimaku was lord, he began to change things. He loosely united the rogues and thieves, mercenaries and assassins that populated the South. He cunningly legalized several crimes within his borders. To the casual observer, this seemed a horrific act...but once the acts were legal, Shimaku received tons of revenue from bands of rogues purchasing licenses and registering officially as criminals...and likewise tons of revenue from people willing to pay protection taxes. Life became far less dangerous and achieved a strangely peaceful balance. Illegal criminals were dealt with harshly, and legal criminals were under Shimaku's control.

While power struggles were an everyday occurrence in the South, no one dared challenge Shimaku for his position. The serpent was as fearsome a fighter as he was silver-tongued and cunning. Besides, no one else really wanted the tremendous task of overseeing the countless bands of cutthroats.

When word had reached the south that the three cardinal lords of the North, South, and East had been slain, and the only one to walk away, bloody sword in hand, was Toga of the West...talk had flown about wildly. Several wanted to charge the West in the name of revenge - but more likely with dreams of plunder.

Things had remained at an uneasy sort of standstill, no one sure who would take Lord Shimaku's place, and no one willing to volunteer. Finding the serpent-lord again was already bringing a sigh of relief to the lips of many.

If he survived his terrible wounds, that was.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei wanted to laugh. It had been so easy. Not a single one of the bustling healers, attendants, or guards had even thought twice about taking him into the palace and working on tending his 'wounds'. It would take patience, of course...he had to be cautious. If his cover was blown too early, things would be infinitely more bothersome.

He waited the better part of the day before allowing his serpentine eyes to flutter open. He heard a collective gasp as the healer and Shimaku's chief advisor hurried over. He recognized the advisor right off - before he had embarked on his journey to this castle, he had pulled as much information from Shimaku's head as he could manage. It was a shame, really, that so much time had passed since he had elected to go this route - the longer one was dead, the more their memories decayed. However...he had gotten enough.

"Lord Shimaku! You are awake!"

"Yes...." He tried to sit up and fell back with a wheezing groan.

"My Lord, please, your wounds...! Do not try to get up."

"We must...have a war council immediately. There is no time for me to lay here. Summon my generals at once."

Micah, Shimaku's advisor, nodded once although he was not so sure his lord should be awake. However, Shimaku had always been level-headed and knew his limits...so...

It didn't take Micah long to get all the necessary parties together and order them into the healer's room. After a general display of gratitude that Shimaku seemed as if he were recovering, Tsetsukosei began to speak.

"I was at the Council of Lords...and learned that Lord Toga of the West had made enemies with some beings from another plane. They demanded he hand over his son Sesshoumaru to them in payment for several atrocities committed against them by Sesshoumaru himself. Lord Toga refused them, even knowing that it would mean war for the west and then the rest of us.

"We held council to try to convince him that one life was not worth more than the thousands that will die should war come to these lands. He became enraged and attacked Lord Kanjiro. I tried to pull him off of Lord Kanjiro, but the battle was chaotic. I fear the wounds I suffered were accidentally inflicted on me by my friend of the East. Lord Toga killed both Lady Shirizu and Lord Kanjiro, and left me for dead."

The generals murmured angrily to each other. Tsetsukosei let them talk for a while before smoothly interjecting.

"We can not stand for this. I contacted the beings whom were declaring war on Lord Toga, and they have agreed to ally with us. With their strength backing us, we can take the West...and all its wealth in spoils."

A hearty cheer went up amidst the easily-swayed minds of the gold-hungry bandit warlords that served as Shimaku's generals.

"Design me a battle plan. I will detail what sort of support we can expect. We march as soon as I am well."


	92. Chapter 91

Pride (In the Name of Love) 91 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Someone out there MUST be able to draw me a Sairex...I'll give you writings in exchange. _ Oh, if only the Jess could draw. Sigh. Ah, well.

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"Really, my Lord Father, I think we should simply scourge them from the face of this world," Sesshoumaru drawled, leaning back comfortably on his favored couch in the study and reading over a particularly tedious scroll, while Toga was at the desk doing much the same. Neither of them had bothered dressing in full armor, although Toga had Sounga leaning nearby just to be on the safe side.

"Now, now...the tanuki are a good-hearted race, even if they are rather...trying."

"They make a game of everything and it is almost painful to get to the heart of any matter they choose to discuss...this scroll is almost entirely extraneous."

"You think that one is bad, you should see this one. I have never seen words so tiny...filling the entire damn thing..."

"Like I said. Scourge. Think about it."

Toga chuckled and tossed the scroll to Sesshoumaru. "I don't know how you've dealt with them this long. I didn't have any sizeable tribes of tanuki in my day."

"Hn...this Sesshoumaru was too generous, it seems." Sesshoumaru peered at the new scroll and squinted at the almost impossibly tiny writing. "Do you think they are naturally like this, or is this something they have worked at solely to cause us grief?"

"Oh, I truly hope they aren't trying to draw our ire." Toga blinked as Sesshoumaru tossed the scroll back to him. "What, tired of it already?"

Sesshoumaru smirked. "I am not acting Lord, therefore I am not beholden to deal with such matters."

Toga arched an eyebrow, then smirked in return, setting down his pen. "Ah, but I AM acting Lord, and you must obey my orders."

"True enough, but I will not be gracious nor accepting should you attempt to foist that dreadful scroll off on me. Besides...you surely must be able to handle a request from a simple tanuki. Unless your old eyes cannot handle the strain..."

Toga's other eyebrow hiked up to join the first. "Oh, is that how it is...don't think you're too old for me to put you over my knee, pup."

"With all due respect, my Lord Father, I would never allow such an indignity. Besides, you never spanked me anyways. The only beatings I received were in the arena."

"I never had to. You never got on the wrong side of me and always submitted to me whenever it was required of you."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly. "Of course. You are my Lord. It is only proper that I bow to you until I am strong enough to defeat you."

Toga grinned and left the desk, moving to sit on the couch next to Sesshoumaru. "Defeat me, eh?"

"Yes."

"My dear Sesshoumaru, I do not think you will ever even truly challenge me, let alone defeat me."

Sesshoumaru eyed Toga skeptically, setting down the scroll he had been reading. "Is that so...what makes you think such a thing?"

Toga smiled and lightly trailed his claws along Sesshoumaru's cheek and down across his throat, drawing an involuntary shiver from the younger taiyoukai. "Because I think you like submitting to me too much." Toga's smile widened at the sudden, if faint, blush that exploded onto Sesshoumaru's cheeks.

"Perhaps I am lulling you into a false sense of security..."

"No, I hardly think that is the case..." Toga purred, leaning in and nipping lightly at Sesshoumaru's ear. "I'd even go so far as to say you LOVE submitting to me..."

Sesshoumaru found it difficult to draw his words together into a witty retort - Toga had a way of scattering his thoughts to the winds with the smallest of actions. "Well...maybe...for now. Even though I'm still unconvinced you can keep up with me."

Toga chuckled, shifting position and snapping his arms around Sesshoumaru's waist, jerking the younger taiyoukai off balance as he leaned forward, pinning Sesshoumaru in a half-laying, half-sitting position against the arm and seat of the couch. "Keep up with you, pup? I can run circles around you long after you are too exhausted to even think of moving."

"This Sesshoumaru requires proof."

Toga flashed him a rakish grin. "This Sesshoumaru is turning into a hentai, through and through..."

Before Sesshoumaru could respond, he found himself the victim of a deeply passionate kiss. All thoughts of continuing their verbal debate melted from his mind as he gave in to it, his arms snaking around Toga after a moment. He returned the kiss with equal intensity.

Toga let out a surprised little noise when Sesshoumaru nipped his lower lip, although it quickly turned into a pleased little growl as he pressed in harder, increasing the kiss to almost bruising intensity. The hungry, devouring kiss continued for what seemed like an eternity, only breaking when they were both in desperate need of air. Toga pulled back a scant couple inches, breathing hard even as he shifted his body to fit more fully against Sesshoumaru's, unable to resist grinding his hips forward.

Sesshoumaru groaned as Toga's teeth began nibbling at his ear, a fresh white bolt of arousal charging through him. Without consciously thinking about it, he hooked a leg around Toga and arched up against him, enjoying the soft noise it drug from the elder inu. His breath exploded out in a hiss a moment later as Toga's hand slid down and began to massage his rapidly growing erection through his hakama.

Sesshoumaru, not to be outdone, returned the gesture. It didn't take long for the both of them to be desperately aroused. Sesshoumaru moaned low in his throat, at the same time frustrated at the clothing in his way but not wanting the wonderfully teasing sensation to stop.

Toga wasn't in much better shape, but he assuredly wanted things to go farther enough to keep his wits about him. He bit back another loud groan - damn, but Sesshoumaru had learned quickly the best ways to touch him. He broke free of their rather wild kiss, a deep growl rumbling in his chest.

Sesshoumaru understood immediately what it meant. The growl was a definite demand of dominance, but combined with Toga's pause it became an unspoken request. Sesshoumaru did appreciate that - submitting, even to Toga, grated against some of his baser alpha instincts, and asking permission gave him back some of his control. He would never deny his Lord Father anything, of course...nor would he want to...but the gesture was still deeply appreciated. He knew Toga would appreciate his silent answer just as much and for all the right reasons.

Toga assuredly did appreciate it when Sesshoumaru willingly bared his throat for him, and he immediately moved to nip at the exposed flesh. Having been given the go-ahead, his hands immediately began attacking Sesshoumaru's clothing.

Before they managed to get much of the bothersome cloth out of the way, however, they heard a noise that froze them in their tracks. They heard the soft murmur of the guard at the door as well as Rin's giggle and a louder laugh from Inuyasha.

"Bloody hell..." Toga groaned, panting hard and glaring balefully at the door. His eyes widened, however, when he saw it begin to open.

Sesshoumaru barely bit back an undignified yelp. Toga shot across the room and into his chair, hastily making an effort to look less disheveled, and Sesshoumaru scrambled to right his clothing, get off his back, and make himself look occupied and calm in the scant few seconds they had before the door flew open and their company bounced in.

Both Inuyasha and Rin were grinning ear to ear. Inuyasha looked about ready to say something but paused, ears flicking forward curiously. His glance slowly slid to Sesshoumaru, noting how flushed his brother looked. His grin turned somewhat sly as he glanced over at Toga, who appeared perfectly calm and collected sitting at his desk.

"Lord Sesshoumaru!" Rin beamed and bounced over to him.

"Hello, Rin." Sesshoumaru said after a moment, pleased with how level his voice sounded and thanking all the powers that be for his clothing being so loose and baggy and ...concealing of the evidence of his almost painful arousal.

"Lord Sesshoumaru, my arm is getting better!"

"That is good." Sesshoumaru gave her a smile.

"What are you doing?"

"Ahem.. I am...reading this scroll."

Rin eyed the scroll for a moment, then glanced at Sesshoumaru curiously. "Lord Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes, Rin?"

"If you are reading it...why is it upside down?"

Toga bit his lip in an effort to not burst out laughing at his elder pup, who was unable to formulate an immediate answer. He came smoothly to the rescue, though, giving Inuyasha a grin. "So, what brings you two here?"

"Eh, Rin and I were just hangin' out and playing with some of those card things she brought with Kagome. Anyhow, I need to talk to you and she wanted to see him. I hope we didn't..er...interrupt anything." Inuyasha's amused smirk showed that he very much expected that he did, indeed, interrupt something...he could smell the telltale signs even if he couldn't fathom how Toga had managed to be all the way over at his desk.

"Of course, what do you need?"

"Well, that mangy wolf and I decided to finally make the whole mating thing official, and we were wonderin' if you could do something...I dunno, fancy and elaborate and whatnot. The elders in his pack are gonna be real bent out of shape that he won't be giving them any cubs, but we figure if we make a big deal out of this being a political alliance and all that that they'll lay off."

Toga grinned widely. "Well, congratulations...and yes, of course. I shall make a grand production out of it for you and appease them. The alternative to them accepting it, of course, is to be on the wrong side of my blessings."

Inuyasha grinned. "Thanks, its appreciated."

"I'm pleased to hear that things are working out for you and your intended, Inuyasha. Very pleased. And you do have my blessings for this. We've not really come to odds with the wolves in the past, but bringing them into a tight alliance such as this is a good thing. You might wish to wait a bit, however."

Inuyasha blinked. "Eh? Why's that? Kinda wanted to get it done with so Kouga didn't have to listen to them bitch..."

Sesshoumaru glanced over. "Because if you did it right now, with the potential of war looming, it may be looked upon in disfavor, as our attempt to loop the wolves into an alliance they cannot break and thus force them to join us in a battle they may wish to avoid."

The hanyou looked a bit taken aback, but then nodded. "Right, I got ya. They'll join us anyway, Kouga wouldn't let us fight without helping. But I see your point. Sesshy, you look a little flushed, you feeling alright?"

Sesshoumaru glared murderously at his brother and bit back the growl in his throat.

"Oh no, you aren't sick, are you, Lord Sesshoumaru?" Rin looked at him with huge, alarmed eyes.

Toga chuckled. "Lady Rin, I assure you, my pup is fine, no need for concern. Inuyasha...you're quite perceptive, but I recommend you play nice."

Inuyasha chuckled. "Right, right...I'll let you two get back to business, as it were. Should I expect you for breakfast?"

"Yes, of course."

"Alright, then...c'mon, Rin, I want you to show me how to do that fish game again!"

Rin beamed and quickly bowed to Sesshoumaru and Toga before bouncing out of the room after Inuyasha.


	93. Chapter 92

Pride (In the Name of Love) 92 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer .org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Ugh. No power at work last night...had to do all my work by flashlight and I hurt one of my fingers pretty bad, so typing is kinda...a painful experience. Perhaps I can type an entire fic without using o's or l's? LOL....hrm. I think I just epic failed.

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After breakfast, Toga pulled Sesshoumaru to the side. "My Sesshoumaru, I have something to tell you."

Sesshoumaru slowly lifted an eyebrow. "Yes?"

"I have some urgent business that I need to take care of. I shall likely be gone until tomorrow evening."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "This Sesshoumaru is quite capable of handling matters for a whole day."

Toga smiled. "Indeed. On the morrow, make quite certain you get a head start on the next morning's work, and make time for a long nap."

Sesshoumaru stared at Toga for a moment, puzzled by the strange request. "Ah...why?"

Toga smiled and leaned in closer, his voice dropping to a low purr. "Because, my Sesshoumaru, y ou will not be getting any sleep tomorrow night."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and his cheeks flared with a sudden blush as Toga abruptly turned and sauntered off down the hallway with a little wave. Sesshoumaru couldn't think of a single thing to say and just stood, staring, as his father vanished down the hallway after cheerily bidding him goodbye.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex squinted and poked at the blessed pendant idly with a small twig of wood he'd taken from the Tree of Ages. Things were not going quite how he had hoped, and he was beginning to wonder if this device would work at all. He jumped, startled, at the sudden knock on the door. Miroku wouldn't knock - besides, there was no way he was done doing whatever monkly task he was off performing just yet - and the raven couldn't imagine who else would be visiting. "Yes?"

Toga smiled and slid into the room. He was dressed in his full battle regalia. Sairex eyed him for a long moment.

"Vell, hello...."

"It has been some time since we've chatted. How are you feeling?"

"I'm fairly vell, tank you. A little tired, ztill zuffering zome nasty headaches and dreams. Not all of vhat I zaw vhile I vas inzane vas pleasant. It's very hard to tell vhat vas real and vhat vasn't." Sairex looked down as his pale cheeks started to flush as he recalled a particular incident...involving Toga...

"Sairex..."

"I'm going to assume dat DAT one vas real," the raven muttered, still blushing.

"If you are referring to what happened when I first came upon you...then yes. It was."

"I'm zorry." Sairex frowned deeply. "I...I didn't mean to."

"Sairex, my friend....I do not fault you for anything you said or did while you were waging your battle. It's alright."

"No, it really isn't." Sairex let out a long sigh. "I vould dearly love to accept your forgiveness and move on, but dere is a problem vith dat."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "And that is?"

"You can pass it off as zometing I did because I vas out of my mind and let me off easy, but I can't. I vas not alvays in control of my mind or my body, but dere vere plenty of times vhen I had partial control. I..." Sairex faltered, not sure how to say what he wanted to. "Forget it. I accept your forgiveness and ve vill move on."

"While you still have my forgiveness, I am now quite curious."

Sairex flicked his eyes up to meet Toga's, and the inu was taken aback by the anguish he saw there. "I did tings I vould not normally have done, but I meant dem. Dat is da problem, Toga. I never ztopped loving you, I never ztopped vanting you, and I never vanted to leave you. I never ztopped tinking about you, vondering vhat you vere doing and if you had moved on. For longer dan I can zay, I ached just to feel you. And even vhen time allowed me to finally get past it all and move on as much as I vas able, it didn't make it ztop. All dese centuries, all dese tousands of years...you've been in da zhadows of my heart. I never contacted you vhen I finally vas free of Zetsukosei da first time because...you vere moving on vith your life. I figured it vas best to let it lie, better if you thought me dead zince I had no vay to reach you and couldn't leave da Circle."

Toga stared wide-eyed at the raven. Whatever he had expected in coming to this room, it wasn't this...

"And den tings happened. I zomehow fell into dis relationship vith Miroku, and I do not regret it in any vay. I love him truly. And den...and den you vere zuddenly back in da picture. I vanted to...I...kaa..." Sairex closed his eyes. "It doesn't matter, I didn't. But den I lose my control and my body runs avay vith it all. I feel zo...guilty. How can I harbor zuch tings in my mind, and ztill take da love of another as if I ztill deserve it?"

"Oh, Sairex..." Toga sighed heavily and closed his eyes. "I will not bother to go into detail, but it was not lightly that I moved on either. It took me many centuries before I even thought to take a mate. Had I not convinced myself you must surely be long dead, I probably never would have. It would have spared me much grief, although I cannot regret it as it gave me my Sesshoumaru. But...do not think that, just because you still care for me, it makes you unworthy of another. The monk loves you, and you caring won't change that."

"I know. I zimply...feel guilty. I have no intent on trying to pursue you...I just...I vanted you to know. I do not like being dishonest, even if it is only vith myself."

"My dear little bird, you can still love me and I can still love you, even if we are no longer intimate. Our respective mates will understand."

Sairex blinked, then smiled. "I zuppose you are right, at dat...tank you, Toga. Is...inquiring as to my vellbeing da purpose of your visit?..."

Toga slowly shook his head. "No, it isn't. I need to ask a favor of you."

"Of course. Vhat do you need?"

"Send me to the Circle. I intend to bring back this Jormandar's head on a platter." A soft growl escaped Toga as he finished his vow.

Sairex stared at him wide-eyed before shaking his head. "No. You can't go by yourzelf."

"Sairex, my friend...for the moment, it is a request that I would appreciate if you granted. Deny me and I will be forced to remind you that you swore fealty to me. I do not wish to make it an order."

"Kaa...in a roundabout zort of vay, I tink you just did."

"Even so...you must comply."

"I vill not."

"Sairex. I will not allow this fiend to freely roam about and keep coming up with clever new ways to hurt my pup. He has even threatened war! The only clean and quick way to end all this nonsense and put a close to all this needless grief is to kill the bastard, and I cannot do that without going to him since he will not come to me!"

"Jormandar is no easy conquest, Toga." Sairex crossed his arms over his chest and met the inu's increasingly angry gaze, not backing down an inch. "Vhile he himzelf vould not be a match for you, you vould not face him alone. His palace is a fortress, filled with traps and zurrounded by a massive army. It is the only vay anyone of power ztays alive in da Circle. Charging in dere alone is foolish, and I vill not let you vaste your life."

"It is an order, Sairex. Gods know I love you, but I will not let you keep me from this." Toga growled softly.

"And I vill not assist you. Vhat vill you do? Exile me? Toss me back in da dungeon?"

The air was charged and tense for a long moment, Sairex utterly refusing to submit despite the sudden flare in Toga's aura. They stared each other down for a long moment before Toga sighed heavily and closed his eyes.. "Please, Sairex. He must be stopped and I don't know any other damn way to get there."

Sairex frowned. "You don't know anyting about how da Circle vorks, you don't know vhere to go, you don't know vhat you're getting into...or you vould not demand dis of me. Toga, no demon lives as long as you by being a fool You died once because you charged blindly off into a zituation you didn't know much about. You are threatening to repeat dat zame mistake. If you vant me to be your advisor, den perhaps you zhould listen to my advice."

Toga frowned. Sairex was right, of course, although he hated having it pointed out to him like this. "What else can I do? Just let him keep coming up with new plans until one finally works and he takes my pup from me? What do you think will happen to me if I sit here and do nothing and my Sesshoumaru is taken or worse and I have done NOTHING to prevent it?"

Sairex was clearly not happy with the thought. "...If you insist on going, den, I vill make da portal for you...but I am going vith you."

"No, I will not risk your life to protect my pup's."

"If you don't take me vith you, you von't be going."

"Damn it, raven..."

"I vill not let you throw avay your life. And vhile I can ztop you from going...you can not ztop me from accompanying you. If you insist on fighting me over dis, zo be it. If you vould exile me if I do not comply, den I vill leave vithout a fight. But you vill not go alone. Or do I need to go back troo dat whole love-you zpeech I just gave a few minutes ago?"

"You would think I would have learned, by now, that it's nigh on impossible to make you submit...I AM Lord around here, you know..."

"Kaa, and I don't play by your canine inztinct rules. I learned a few tings by association but us bird types don't really buy into da whole alpha-beta ting."

"A shame, really. It works out so nicely."

Sairex snorted. "Of course it does, vhen you're da alpha and everyone else has to do vhat you zay."

"Its simpler. Everyone knows their place and there are no unnecessary conflicts like the one we just had. Besides, not everyone does what I say just because I say it. My Sesshoumaru challenges me all the time."

"It vas entirely necessary. I know you could take me in a fight, but I vould rather die dan give in no matter how bad you tink you vant it. And Zezzhoumaru belongs to you utterly. Even if he is villful at times, he vill alvays submit to you."

"Mm. Well. Shall we begin?"

"Kaa...yes. Let me go tell Miroku I am leaving, first...and den ve vill go."

"Very well. I shall be here awaiting your return."


	94. Chapter 93

Pride (In the Name of Love) 93 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Mmm...after I finish writing, I get to eat tacos. Mmm...then I'll either work on my sidestories or editing...unless the pull of watching more anime hits me harder. Hehehe....

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Sairex eyed Miroku for a long moment, not wanting to disturb his meditation. He sighed mentally. Miroku would not be happy about this, but Sairex really had no choice but to tell him. After all, he was going to have to possess his lover to open a portal back, since he'd not yet taught Miroku the process. // Decided lack of planning, that... //

Miroku surprised Sairex by speaking. He never opened his eyes or moved, however. "Hello, Sairex....something I can do for you?"

"Indeed. To make a long ztory zhort, I had a bit of a ... confrontation...vith Toga and ve are going to da Circle. He intends to bring back Jormandar's head, and I intend to get him out of dere alive vhen he realizes dat he's powerful but cannot take on an entire army in a vell-guarded fortress by himzelf."

Miroku's eyes popped open at that and he gave Sairex a deep frown. "I really don't like the sound of that."

"Kaa, me either...but he's ztubborn...and if he doesn't try, he von't be able to ztop letting it eat at him. And I really don't vish to be exiled or caged."

"He was going to exile you?"

"Kaa...probably not. I don't know. Anyvay...I have to go...and I'll need you to bring us back."

"I do not know how to open these doors yet, Sairex."

"And I don't have time to teach you. Vill you allow me to control you again?"

"Of course. Just...be careful, and make sure you both come back in one piece."

Sairex grinned a bit. "Kaa, of course...I have enough tricks up my zleeves to escape and I'm not fool enough to face Zezzhoumaru and let him know I let zometing happen to his father."

Miroku stood up and pulled Sairex into an embrace, giving him a soft kiss. "Promise me you won't do anything stupid."

"Hmm. I've had dis converzation before."

"And you traded yourself to that monster. Please, Sairex."

"I have no intention of coming back vith zo much as a zcratch and abzolutely no intention of ztaying dere, I promise."

"Alright. I will see you when you return."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex spent a few moments preparing himself. If he was going to be going into combat - and he had no doubt that it would come to that - then he was going to do so comfortably.

Toga's jaw almost hit the floor when Sairex finally returned. He was unable to do anything but stare. It was like a vision from his past.

Ever since his return, he had only seen the raven dressing in black, usually a simple haori and hakama without any real adornment. Not now, however. Now, Sairex was dressed in the same fashion he used to wear, long ago, when Toga had first met him.

He wore a simple white wrap around his waist that came down just above his knees and was edged in gold. Rune-carved gold bracers adorned his ankles and wrists, and a slender gold collar curved around the base of his throat. He was otherwise bare, which revealed almost all of the intricate, tribal-esque lines of his tattoos. Tiny gold hoops were in his ears as well, and his eyes were traced with long lines of kohl. Slung loosely around his hips in a criss-cross fashion were two slender gold bands containing sheaths for the identical tonfa-style swords the raven carried. Toga had only seen Sairex wield the thin, unconventional blades once...and had decided he never wanted to be on the wrong end of them. He had no doubt he could win if it really came to blows but he knew, too, that he would take one hell of a painful beating in the process.

Sairex eyed the inu Lord before arching an eyebrow, a slight smirk dancing across his lips. "Vhat? You have your battle-gear, I have mine."

"Yes, but how am I supposed to fight if I'm too busy staring? I haven't seen you like that since..."

Sairex nodded. "It vasn't practical to vear dis zort of ting vhen ztealth vas of da essence in my zurvival. Vhite is not a good color for hiding in a black realm. However...I don't tink you intend to be very ztealthy and I fight more comfortably like dis. Oh. And da gold is...zhiny. I like it. Not really necessary, but it looks nice."

Toga chuckled. "True enough. Let us go, then."

After a few moments, Sairex had worked open a portal and the two of them stepped through into the dreary landscape of the Black Circle. Toga looked about ready to charge off, but paused, realizing he didn't know where to charge to, exactly. "Which way?"

"Vest by zouthvest. It is a fair distance from 'ere. How vould you prefer to travel?"

Toga thought for a moment and grinned. "Ever ridden a dog before?"

Sairex looked about to make an immediate response before blushing fiercely and coughing a bit. "Ahem. You vould know, vouldn't you...."

The inu patriarch chuckled and closed his eyes, releasing his hold on his true form. He felt the wind whip his hair free of its knot, the familiar stretch and twist as his muscles shifted and realigned. When his transformation was complete, he glanced at Sairex. "Now, now, keep your mind clean. Honestly, what's with all you people lately?"

Sairex snorted and hopped onto Toga's back. "It's not my fault...you all are bad influences on me...and you know full vell vhat you zaid before you zaid it, you just like to tease me and make me blush."

"Well, you make it so easy..." With a low, amused growl, the inu bounded off in the direction Sairex had indicated.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha leaned against the wall next to Kouga, dressed up in his official armor and such himself. "So, what is it exactly that yer smelly wolves found that is SOOO important as to require us to get off our lazy asses and investigate?"

"Dunno what's causin' it, but there are several villages southeast of here gettin' destroyed. Could be the work of a demon or a successful group of bandits, dunno. And my wolves smell a lot nicer than your doggy palace. Ugh."

"As if. Well, come on then, fleabait."

"Come on yourself, mutt! I'm still faster than you'll ever be!" Kouga flashed Inuyasha a grin before bounding off, leaping to the top of the wall and then over. Inuyasha was right on his heels. Both of them were very careful to leap well clear of the wall - neither wanted to be snagged by what Rin had termed "Lord Sesshoumaru's flower". The carnivorous vines had almost entirely surrounded the castle walls now, not only surviving but thriving. The flowers had a mild, pleasant scent that often drifted on the breeze through the castle grounds. The vines may have looked like an open invitation to encourage would-be assailants to scale the walls...but that would be the worst and last mistake they would make in their lives. The plants had mutated, as well...or perhaps simply reached a higher stage of evolution than what Sesshoumaru had originally plucked them in. Large, spiny green pods grew near the bases of each plant and sometimes would open, revealing massive hooked teeth within a gaping maw. The plants had developed a taste for eating the flesh and bones of the victims they caught after their thorns had drained them of blood.

Kouga and Inuyasha ran swiftly, a small pack of wolves at their heels. Their conversation ranged from lewd and flirtatious to challenges and insults.

All chatter ceased, however, when they approached the first village. Most of it had been burned to the ground, although several buildings still smoldered. They searched around for a few moments, trying to determine what could have caused the devastation...and both Inuyasha and Kouga froze, catching the scent at the same time. Their eyes flew wide as they looked at each other.

"Do you smell..."

"Yeah, no doubt about it. I would never forget that stench anywhere. Naraku..."

"I thought we destroyed that bastard for good! How can he keep coming back!?"

"Fuck if I know. He's like a bad rash. He just keeps coming back no matter what you do."

"But why destroy villages at random? They aren't even in a straight line. It's like he's just randomly wandering from place to place to blow shit up."

"This is Naraku we're talking about. Who knows what goes on in that rotten mess of slimy worms he calls a brain?"

"I don't know, but I intend to find out."

Inuyasha snorted. "Kouga, I'm with you on this one...but be careful. This could all be the beginnings of a trap..."

"Well, how'd you deal with Naraku's traps before?"

"Charged in anyways and came out on top."

"So no worries, then."

"Right. Let's figure out which way this asshole went and what he's up to."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

He still had no real grasp of who he was or what his purpose was, but Naraku had figured out a few things.

He had learned that he was most assuredly not human, even if he did not know how to utilize most of his demonic powers. To his delight, he had discovered that his body closed itself up after almost any wound, and when he was cut, a spray of toxic miasma poisoned and melted most of those that dared to try.

He had not quite yet figured out why he was so at war within himself. A part of him was urged to live the life of a bandit, and yet another part of him desperately wanted to crush that urge. It was not a puzzle he could solve. He had attempted to give in to his bandit urges but wound up disgusted with himself. He burned the village and its spoiled.

The next few villages he burned and destroyed just for the simple sake of doing it and confirming his hatred of humanity. He took great delight in the most recent village...he had slid in under the guise of being a poor, weary traveler...and when they least expected it he had destroyed them all. The little betrayal, the shock and horror as he turned on them....mm, that had been delicious...although it really would be better if he could get some minions to do his dirty work for him. These pathetic worms did not deserve his direct attentions.

Further, he needed a castle or a manor or something. A base of operations. Visions of conquest squirmed in his brain. Yes, a base would do nicely. He simply had to find one that was worthy and take it over, that was all.

With his new plan in mind, Naraku continued his destructive path southward. He didn't know where he was headed, but knew he needed to put some distance between himself and....and....

...and whatever it was that loomed to the north of him, potent and hostile to him.

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A/N - To clarify a bit more, Sairex's mode of dress is very Egyptian-ish. The raven himself is not, by any means, egyptian of course. This is more the standard sort of clothing he wore back in the day when he was still future chief and shaman of his clan, and it was how he used to look when he first met Toga.


	95. Chapter 94

Pride (In the Name of Love) 94 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I'm almost at 250k words. _ 400 some odd pages. And no true end in sight, although I've thought about possible endings. If I DO end it, though, chances are good I'll launch immediately into a direct sequel. XD And all this started on March 21st. o.O... I had nothing written before hand. This doesn't even mention the four sidestories I have posted and the one that I'll PROBABLY be posting later today (was going to post it last night but got distracted, it didn't get finished, and it's going to be longer than I thought.) AND there is ANOTHER sidestory I had been working on before that but I shelved it in favor of the one I'm doing now, which is a thank-you of sorts to a couple fabulous people.

Maybe I need to get a life, eh? XD Ah well. Writing this and reading reviews is about the only thing that makes Jess happy. I feel connected to people, in a strange way. Love for you all!

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Toga slowly came to a stop as a massive, dark stone structure loomed in the distance. He felt the strangest tingling back on his shoulders and heard Sairex murmuring softly. "What are you doing?"

Sairex didn't answer immediately - he finished his chant first. "Vell. I am zhielding us from detection as much as possible."

Toga nodded and then crouched lightly before bucking his shoulders, launching a rather surprised raven a few feet in the air off his back. Before Sairex's indignant and surprised cry even finished, however, Toga had slid back into his humanoid form and caught him in his arms, a roguish smile on his lips.

Sairex blushed brightly and gave Toga a mock glare. "Kaa, you could have at least varned me."

"What fun would THAT be?"

Sairex swallowed a bit. "Yes, vell...you might want to...y'know...put me down."

Toga appeared to consider it for a moment before setting the raven back on his feet. In reality, he was trying NOT to think about his current actions involving Sairex. Things were just coming back to him so easily. What was it about forbidden relationships that drew him like a moth to flame, anyway? It wasn't as if he or Sairex had any intention of being together like that again. They both had their own paths to follow.

Sairex squinted before reaching up and snapping his fingers in Toga's face. The inu blinked before grinning sheepishly. "No time for daydreaming, dog."

"Right, of course. That is the place?"

Sairex frowned. "Yes."

Toga stared at the castle, feeling the rage simmering deep within him starting to build. In this place was the creature he had fought before...the creature that had caused him so much grief...the creature that had masterminded the scheme that had almost taken away his Sesshoumaru.

Sairex saw the shift in Toga's demeanor, heard the low growl building in his chest. "Toga...ztay calm, if you can. Dis place vill be full of traps. I do not doubt you can cut down da rank and file monsters here. Zo can I. But please."

"I will not do anything overly foolish." Toga grated out before drawing Sounga. "How will we enter?"

"Mm. Vest zide, troo dat vindow."

The two set off. Toga bounded swiftly and silently from rock to rock, and Sairex did much the same, using long leaps and the occasional short flight to keep up with the inu. Sairex motioned for Toga to stop when they reached the window. Sharp yellow eyes studied it before the raven picked up a small rock and tossed it towards the opening.

There was an immediate flash of red light and the rock melted to slag, dripping slowly from the barrier. "Kaa...dis vas not unexpected..."

"Well, front door it is."

"Are y ou crazy?!" Sairex hissed.

Toga smirked. "Sometimes. Besides, if these windows are warded thus, do you not suppose they ALL are?"

"Vell, it is likely."

"Can you dismantle this barrier?"

"No."

"Thus...door it is. And I see only one."

"This is a bad idea, Toga...a bad idea."

Toga shrugged and bounded off the wall, sword in hand. Sairex sighed inwardly and jumped to follow him. // We're both going to die at this rate... //

The inu patriarch stopped as he approached the gate. Two massive obsidian figures flanked the gate. Giant axes were clutched in glassy stone hands. Toga tossed a glance to Sairex.

"Golems."

"Alive, then."

"Animated, yes, but I don't tink you can call dem technically alive. I'm not ztrong enough to cut dem, but I can distract one vhile you chop up da other."

Toga nodded. "Good enough for me." With a determined growl, he sprang at the golems, leading with a vicious stroke of Sounga.

His attack caught the automatons by surprise, and he managed to sever an arm and put several deep gouges into one before they began their counterattack. Sairex dove in to distract the second. His tonfa-style blades whipped in with vicious and rapid strikes. The unconventional blades gave the raven something of a slight advantage - they had a different range of motion and strike style than normal swords, thus making his combat routine far less predictable. Still, for all that, he hadn't been lying. His blades chipped away at the beast but were not causing any major damage.

Toga attacked his target viciously. The construct grated and whirled, but eventually was dismembered to the point of being immobile. He whirled, his blood thrumming in his veins at the sheer glee of being in real combat. For all his cool, level-headed nature on a day to day basis, for all his dislike of war and general practice of peace, Toga reveled in a good fight. It made his blood sing. The strike, the dodge, the parry...the blood and victory...he was born for it.

Toga paused only briefly to watch Sairex. He was so used to seeing the raven buried in a pile of books or working some spell or another that he tended to forget that Sairex had extensive training with physical combat as well. Truly, he was a thing of beauty and grace.

"You going to ztand and vatch me all day or you going to destroy dis ting? I can just fly avay, you know..."

Toga grinned and leapt into the fray. The construct was slow, and by the time it realized it needed to switch targets because Toga was far more a threat, the fight was nearly over. The golem fell over with a thunderous crash.

"Vell...zo much for ztealth," Sairex sighed and followed Toga into the courtyard.

The inu paused. Something was wrong. He could feel it quivering at the edges of his senses, but he couldn't see or smell an enemy. Golden eyes narrowed as he glanced between the many doorways leading into the main building. "Do you sense that, Sairex...?"

Sairex nodded, slowly taking up a position at Toga's back. "Yes...but I don't know vh--aaaack!"

Toga jerked around just in time to see the ground open up, clawed and rotting hands clutching the raven's ankle and trying to drag him down. A quick strike from Sounga severed the grasping limbs, although they still seemed to be moving of their own accord, trying to dig dirty claws into the raven's skin and squeeze hard enough to break bones.

Sairex managed to get free before he got more than a few scratches. However, all around them, the ground was erupting as things began clawing their way free. Along the edges of the walls, light flared in the stone eyes of gargoyles, and the beasts launched themselves skyward.

"Vell. A velcoming committee."

Toga nodded, not looking terribly disappointed at the prospect. He lifted Sounga, and Sairex saw the ghostly hell-dragon curling in the air around the blade before Toga released his Dragon Twister at the clamoring horde of undead.

The battle was on in full. It seemed however many of the rotting things they killed, however, that no progress was being made Any undead that wasn't fully obliterated continued to twitch, as parts or wholes drug themselves along the ground towards the intruders. Sairex bounced from target to target, hovering a few feet off the ground and using his wings to propel him about, too fast to catch. The ground was soon littered with twitching corpses.

Toga let out a surprised growl as something caught tight hold of his mokomoko and hauled him skyward. Gold eyes flickered up to see a pair of screeching, hideous gargoyles. A low growl in his throat became a roar as he twisted and lashed. Unlike the undead and the golems, these creatures seemed to be actually alive and felt pain. Severed and grasping claws were more than enough to make them drop the enraged inu.

Sairex was forced to change tactics when one diving gargoyle clipped his left wing. He didn't think it was broken, but he was assuredly ground-bound for the moment. Again he closed with Toga, putting his back to the inu Lord's and breathing hard. "Dere is just no damn end to da tings!"

Toga grunted in agreement, dispatching another set of assailants. While the creatures were weak and easily defeated, their sheer numbers and undead nature was starting to wear on the two demons. The undead fought with complete disregard for pain or self preservation. Even as the inu watched, several of the slashed corpses were struggling to rise, and more were coming from the ground. "Damn it all..."

"Toga!" Sairex suddenly yelled. The inu started to turn just as Sairex hit him full force. The unexpected tackle was enough to knock him to the side, although he managed to keep his balance. He didn't need to question why Sairex had felt the need to act as he did, however. Directly where he had been, several tiny silver lashes cracked through the air, each no more than nearly invisible threads.

Toga whirled, fighting off the latest wave of attackers as his gaze darted about to locate their new attacker. His eyes bled crimson as he caught sight of Jormandar in the castle doorway, safely behind his barrier. The long-limbed demon eyed him back calmly, hands raised and fingers spread.

"Welcome to my castle. I must say, I'm surprised to see you both."

Sairex whirled his blades desperately as Jormandar's fingers twitched forward again. There were several metallic clinks as another set of nearly invisible lashes were blocked. The raven suddenly felt something biting like a line of fire around his ankle...right before he was jerked off the ground. He had missed one. Jormandar's fingers flicked again as a wide grin of amusement split the deformed demon's face, and he sent a fresh set of threads at the ensnared raven.

Toga roared as a horde of undead attempted to bury him, throwing the disgusting things in all directions. He cast a glance to Sairex and saw the raven suspended in midair, thin lines of blood at his wrists and ankles.

"Damn you, Jormandar..." Sairex hissed, struggling against the bonds.

"Much to my chagrin, you are essentially immune to my typical attacks, Kinslayer. Most creatures lose all control of their body and become mindless puppets for me to use as I will."

"Zorry to disappoint." Sairex bit back a gasp as the silvery threads constricted around his wrists, forcing him to drop his swords. His eyes snapped open wide, however, when Jormandar jerked his hands to one side. Sairex found himself suddenly sailing through the air directly at Toga.

Toga saw the incoming raven-shaped missile and dropped Sounga, catching the bound bird in midflight as he was knocked backwards, hitting the ground with a thump. Sairex appeared somewhat dazed from the fall, but Toga had an idea. He was not about to lose this opportunity. Jormandar's eyes widened a bit when the inu set the raven to the side and Toga's hands latched onto the threads around Sairex's ankles. The inu grinned ferally even as the razor-sharp threads bit deeply into his hands and jerked sharply.

Jormandar stumbled forward and nearly landed on his face with an angry yell before the wires went slack and vanished from Toga's fingers. "Curse you, dog!"

Toga roared and darted forward, loving the sudden wide-eyed terror in the puppetmaster's face. Jormandar scrambled backward and made a mad dive for the doorway, clearing it just before Toga landed. There was a tremendous crackle of energy as the inu hit the barrier hard.

Despite the sudden rush of burning pain, Toga clenched his teeth and growled, trying to force his hand through the barrier. His growl became a roar. Oh, dear gods, this wretched thing that had caused him and his so much pain was RIGHT THERE and he COULDNT REACH HIM!

Sairex closed his eyes, aware that there were monsters closing in on him from all sides, but unable to move his hands or his feet. Tendons had been severed, and he knew he was bleeding dangerously. He would heal, provided he stopped the bleeding and had a couple days of rest. He knew he was going to lose consciousness soon, and he couldn't afford it. He concentrated on contacting Miroku.

Toga growled in rage and abandoned trying to reach Jormandar, instead scooping up his sword and moving to defend the fallen raven before he became lunch. He slashed at the monsters viciously as the portal home swirled into being, with eyes blazing in incarnadine fury and the bitter taste of failure burning in his throat.


	96. Chapter 95

Pride (In the Name of Love) 95 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - For those that didn't notice, another sidestory featuring Toga and a mini-Sesshy was posted last night ("My Wayward Son") on all my usual posting sites. Do enjoy. =D I'm going to try and finish the other one I have started and THEN I may resume editing...who knows. Ugh. It's a daunting task...I have to reread everything for missed words, mistyped words that are still proper words...(sometimes Jess's brain doesn't...fire properly...and I'm thinking of something besides what I'm doing and I throw a entirely incorrect word into the midst of what I'm saying...)

Anywho, yeah. Enjoy. Still happily accepting art submissions for my Sairex. Love y'all.

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Sairex, in Miroku's body, helped Toga through the portal with his own body and all their collected weaponry. He could feel Miroku flailing about in his mind at the condition that his own body was in. Toga had several minor injuries, but none of them were as bad as his horribly burned right arm, which didn't want to move or respond to his command at all.

Sairex sighed when the portal was closed and let himself fall back into his normal body. His consciousness abruptly shut down. Miroku wasted no time in darting over, alarmed at the amount of blood on and still pouring from his lover. Sairex's injuries were deep from the cutting wires, and the veins in his wrists had been severed. Miroku worked hastily to bandage him up, and Toga watched in silence for a moment before sighing.

"I suppose...if I have a chief advisor....I should occasionally listen to his advice."

Miroku frowned as he moved Sairex into bed, arranging him with infinite care so he wouldn't wake up sore or with crunched wings. "Would you like me to tend your arm, m'Lord?"

"No. It will heal soon enough on its own, likely by this evening. It looks worse than it is."

"You look like you were trying to cook yourself."

"Hn...I rather did." Toga growled at the memory. Oh, that wretched thing had JUST made it into the barrier. He had thought he had Jormandar when he yanked him through the barrier initially. So, so close... Toga sighed. He would have to come up with a better attack plan than 'run in and destroy'. // Good thing Sairex isn't the I-told-you-so type... // "Give him my apologies when he comes to."

Miroku nodded, eyes never leaving Sairex. "I've...never seen him dressed like that before."

Toga glanced between them, his voice quiet. "I haven't since I was young."

"This all must be terribly difficult and awkward for you both."

Toga raised an eyebrow. "Pardon?"

"Loving one another...being forced apart, and then suddenly living within the same walls after so much time."

"You needn't worry, I have no intention of trying to take him from you."

Miroku smiled. "Oh, I am not worried. I trust him, and I trust you. I merely feel sorry for your situation."

Toga sighed. "It was...difficult. And you're quite perceptive. I do still care for Sairex, deeply, and I know he returns it. Even so...that chapter in our lives is closed. He loves you now."

"I know. And that is why it does not bother me if you two are close. I just don't want to see it eat either of you up inside and have you run around hiding it for fear of what I may think."

Toga smiled and nodded. "You are a very interesting human. I can see why Sairex is attracted to you." Miroku's eyes almost popped out of his head when Toga was suddenly in front of him, entirely too close. His voice had dropped to a husky murmur. "Yes, I can see it easily..."

The monk's voice came out as something of a squeak as he leaned back as far as the wall to his back would allow him. "Wh-wh-what are you doing?!"

Toga chuckled and gave the startled Miroku a brief one-armed hug. "Teasing you, monk. But I do wish to thank you regardless. Take good care of my raven."

Miroku nodded blankly, and it took him a moment to recover his wits enough to speak. "You're welcome...now go and see Sesshoumaru. He's been rather snappish all morning."

The inu patriarch chuckled and nodded before heading out the door.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha and Kouga both were surprised when they actually caught up to Naraku. The kumo was sitting on a rock and simply eating his lunch. He didn't so much as look up when they started to approach.

"Is that..."

Inuyasha growled. "That's him." He yanked Tetsusaiga free of its sheath and charged towards Naraku. "NARAKUUUU!!!!"

The kumo blinked, appearing startled, and nearly spilled his tea. // Naraku? // The word sent off all sorts of bells and whistles in his mind, although he didn't know why. He scowled in irritation at the charging half demon. "Do you mind?"

Inuyasha skidded to a stop, baffled. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

Naraku stared at him for a long moment. He KNEW this hanyou. He knew him well. // But how do I know him? Friend? Foe? // Unable to piece together his painfully muddled thoughts, the kumo settled for a dark glare. "I am simply attempting to have lunch, I do not need all this commotion."

Inuyasha and Kouga stared at Naraku with twin expressions of disbelief. Inuyasha finally dealt with it as he dealt with any situation that did not present an immediate answer - he lifted his sword. "I don't know what the hell you're up to, but I'm going to make you pay!"

"Pay?" Naraku irritably put his sandwich down. Damn this hanyou, he was hungry... "Do I know you?"

Inuyasha gaped anew. "Wh...dammit, of course you know me! You spent years trying to hurt me and KILL me!"

"I did?"

"Yes!"

"Then you know who I am." Naraku needed some answers. This confusion was maddening.

"Yeah, I know who you are, you asshole! And why the fuck are you burning all these villages?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?!"

"Who am I?"

Kouga finally got his mental feet under him enough to speak. "Wait a minute...you're saying you really don't know who you are, who we are, or anything?"

Naraku scowled at them both. "No."

Before Inuyasha could retort, Kouga clamped a hand over his mouth. "'Scuse us." He drug the angry hanyou away a bit before releasing him.

"What the fuck did you do that for?" Inuyasha hissed, ears flat against his skull.

"Mutt, I think he's telling the truth."

"I don't give a shit if he is. He's killing people, burning villages, and he's FUCKING NARAKU. I don't care if he was doing community service and handing out flowers to little girls! He's FUCKING NARAKU. And I'm either going to kill him or drag him back home."

"Well, no shit. I just...how the fuck could he have amnesia?"

"Don't know. I'll let someone else figure that one out."

"Right. Think he'll come peacefully?"

Inuyasha smirked and hefted Tetsusaiga. "Hope not."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Jormandar sat in his throne, still badly shaken. The wretched inu had almost killed him! He had never expected to be yanked out of his barrier like that...and Toga was fast, too fast...and frightful in his rage.

"Stupid dog..." he grumbled angrily. He began assessing the damage, trying to ignore the fact that he had almost lost his life.

Toga and Sairex had killed a lot more of his total defense force than they had realized. Had they stuck around another half hour or so, they probably would have depleted his castle guard entirely.

// And with my army out abroad, I would have had no second line of defense save my traps and wards. While that likely would have saved me...there is a chance it would not have. //

Jormandar sighed as he thought of how close he had come to actually capturing Sairex, too. He had caught him, but found the raven's mind to be shielded against his intrusion. // I should have drug him in anyways...what a stupid mistake on my part. I had him incapacitated, even if I couldn't control him. I lost an indescribably priceless hostage. Damn that inu...him and his son both. I am going to kill every single canine in every damn realm, purge the world of them! It will be a better place. //

Grumbling, the puppetmaster made his way to his throne room and irritably began flipping through books. Oh, replacing those undead would be expensive without Karalichala here.

// Just one more thing I lost because of that damned Sesshoumaru... ugh. Now I have to either get more myself...and that takes time and resources...and is difficult for me...and slow. Or I can buy them...but admitting I need a castle guard build up might alert them to the fact I am vulnerable for assault. Damn it! //

With a growl, Jormandar threw back his hood and snatched up a mirror. A few murmurs and gestures and the image in the glass began to ripple. It eventually cleared, revealing Tsetsukosei in his Shimaku disguise.

"What is it?" Tsetsukosei hissed irritably. He did not have many excuses for slipping away from the healers and his generals right now.

"The damned inu Lord attacked. Side by side with that blasted raven."

"Well, you seem to have come out of it alright."

"They killed almost all my guards and my army is on its way to you."

"You have barriers."

"The bastard almost killed me!"

Tsetsukosei hid his smirk. "And you think I would mourn your death, Jormandar?"

"I still have your phylactery, you wretched thing."

The dracolich growled. "I am aware. What is it you would have me do? I cannot very well send you soldiers. If your army goes back, we don't have a chance in hell against the West. In truth, we don't have much chance regardless...but I do not care if the West is conquered. My only desire is to get my claws on the Inu no Taisho's pup."

"Hn, I've been keeping tabs on them all. I still have some eyes and ears in the castle that the Kinslayer hasn't ferreted out yet. The dog has a newfound resolve in life and living. You won't be able to break him this time, not like before. He was mostly alone then."

Tsetsukosei chuckled, a malicious smile appearing on his face. "Oh, on the contrary, Jormandar. BECAUSE of these connections, it will be so much easier....and the best part about it is that I will hardly have to do a thing."

Jormandar eyed the shapeshifting beast skeptically, though he was intrigued. "What...did you have in mind?"


	97. Chapter 96

Pride (In the Name of Love) 96 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I'm on a writing streak. Zoom. Two sidestories in two days. Finally posted the Inuyasha / Kouga backstory. "Sometimes Goodbye is a Second Chance". At all of my usual sites, just clicky my profile story list thingy.

And not that I think many, if any of you will know what I'm talking about, but...when writing the Naraku scene from the last chapter...and this one, all I could think of was the theme music for Kefka from Final Fantasy 3 / 6. XD I always have a mental soundtrack when writing. That's why all my fics have titles that are either lines from songs or the names of songs. Perhaps I should mention which songs...heh. This one is fairly obvious as it's the title of the song itself. "Only to Be With You" = Line from "Still Haven't Found What I'm Looking For" also by U2. "All My Life to Sacrifice" = Line from "Snow (Hey-Oh)" by Red Hot Chili Peppers. "A Crow Left of the Murder" is the title of an Incubus album, not a song...but...close enough. "Wicked Game" is the title of a song by HIM. "Sometimes Goodbye is a Second Chance" is a line from "Second Chance" by Shinedown. "My Wayward Son", song by Kansas.

Generally I DO have a reason for choosing each song title for each story, but I won't bother ya with em as they sometimes are a bit lengthy in explanation. XD. On with the show.

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Toga slid down the hallways in search of his eldest pup. When he failed to find him in either the library or the arena - it seemed the boy was always reading or fighting - he peeked into the study. No Sesshoumaru.

// Hmm... // Toga didn't have a very long list of secondary Sesshoumaru-haunts. He'd never really needed one. Where he was, Sesshoumaru almost assuredly was too unless he had pressing business. He checked bedrooms with no luck. A quick tour of the kitchens - and a snack - and subsequently the hot springs provided no results. // Well, I suppose he shall have to be snappish, as the monk put it, on his own. // Toga finished his snack and headed into his room, working his way out of his armor and then his haori with some difficulty - stripping is incredibly hard one-handed.

He flicked open the curtain and began to examine the nasty burn on his hand and forearm. It was starting to get itchy, although he knew touching it would bring him a world of pain and just slow down the healing process. // Mm. Looks terrible... // It truly did look dreadful, most of his skin blackened and his limb actually slightly twisted. Oh well, no matter. It'd be better soon enough, healing from the inside out. And since his body didn't have too many other wounds to deal with...

Toga pulled the curtains shut again and then pulled the band out of his hair. He shook out the long, silvery tresses and then flopped into his bed. He'd deal with cleaning himself up properly when he had full use of both his arms. Until then...he was tired. He needed a nap.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

'Snappish' was probably a poor choice of words for Sesshoumaru's current state. That morning had wreaked utter havoc on the taiyoukai. Toga would be incredibly sorry he had missed breakfast when someone finally relayed the story to him - the inu Lord loved a good chance to see Sesshoumaru flustered and emotional and trying to pretend he wasn't.

Things hadn't STARTED badly, at least not as far as Sesshoumaru knew. He woke up - although he was a bit pouty at least internally that he had to sleep alone. He had gotten rather used to Toga's warm body and soothing scent being next to him. Oh well, no matter. His father would be back tonight.

Recalling his father's words before he had left on his little trip brought a deep blush to Sesshoumaru's face, which he savagely tried to beat down as he went about the room, gathering his clothing for the day. // ...'You will not be getting any sleep tomorrow night...' I wonder if he meant it or not.... //

Sesshoumaru tried desperately to push such thoughts out of his mind and made his way to the bath. He wasted little time cleaning up. When he was convinced his hair was properly brushed and his attire was properly arrayed, he headed for breakfast.

That was when things went awry.

Miroku was the only one who showed up any time soon, which was not in and of itself too surprising. Sairex and Toga were off on business - Sesshoumaru made a mental note to ask specifically what sort of business when Toga returned, and Inuyasha and Kouga were out investigating some burned villages to the south.

Shippo made his way in after a while. After the heron demoness had healed him, the kitsune had more or less returned to his normal self, even though he was exhausted all the time. He had been told it was normal, as his body was still trying to recover. His friends were glad to see he was on the mend. As for the fox, he made a very stern promise that he would never, ever try to mess with Sairex's things again.

Kagome and Rin were late. Sesshoumaru figured they were likely doing something together and would arrive shortly...and he was right. Eventually the door opened and the two of them entered.

The first thing Sesshoumaru noticed was Rin's face burning in a bright blush. Kagome said nothing, merely peeking at Sesshoumaru out of the corner of her eye.

The second thing to hit him was her scent. Sesshoumaru's eyes flew wide before he could stop them and he froze, hand midway to his glass. Kagome blinked - Rin had been right. Sesshoumaru HAD noticed. And quickly.

His ward was in heat. Sesshoumaru tried to kick himself back into gear and resumed snatching up his glass, suddenly wishing it was something a bit stronger than water. Rin's blush had only gotten worse as she sat down, and Miroku eyed the girls and Sesshoumaru curiously before shrugging slightly. He noticed Shippo blink several times and then gasp. If he had been going to say something, however, it was abruptly cut off by a short and dangerous growl from Sesshoumaru. The kitsune wisely clamped his mouth shut.

// Oh, someone is GOING to have to fill me in, I'm the only one here that can't tell what's going on... // Miroku lamented.

Before breakfast had been utter chaos for the human girls. When Rin had first realized that she was bleeding, her initial reaction was one of panic. Her usual routine when panicking or injured was to run to Lord Sesshoumaru, but she had paused mid-stride and burst into a violent blush at the thought of THAT scenario.

She recalled several incidents over time when she had been injured, and things had followed a rather predictable pattern each time. Either she would run to Sesshoumaru or he would come to her. "Lord Sesshoumaru, Rin is bleeding!" Her Lord would ask her where and she would show him. Generally he would tend her wound with a few gentle licks that had, in more recent times, started to make her blush.

Rin burst out laughing despite her blush at the thought of THIS one. // Lord Sesshoumaru, Rin is bleeding! Where?...// Abruptly, blushing, the girl made the choice to go see Kagome instead, unable to hide her giggles at the thought of Sesshoumaru's reaction to THAT one and glad that the priestess had decided to stay in the feudal era with them. It seemed Kagome's fiance was mad at her for being gone so much and having strange visitors, and their relationship was on the rocks.

Rin had done enough reading and studied enough to figure out what was likely going on after the initial shock had worn off, anyways, and her panic receded. She made her way to Kagome anyways...girl talk always helped with things like this and she had begun to view the miko as something of a big sister.

Kagome had helped take care of her and the two had taken a relaxing bath. Rin was somewhat reluctant to head to breakfast, and the miko couldn't help but ask why.

"Lord Sesshoumaru will know."

"Oh, nonsense. You just had a bath and I've got some things for you...trust me, you'll be fine."

Rin stared at her incredulously. "Kagome...he will know the moment I walk in the room, if not sooner."

Kagome blinked. Well, sure, the inu demons seemed to possess an extraordinary sense of smell, but...to notice from across a sizable room the moment she walked in? "Honey, I think you're worrying too much."

"Oh, Rin is not worried. Much."

And so they had made their way to breakfast after getting dressed and ready. Kagome had kept her eye on Sesshoumaru, wondering if Rin's prediction had been accurate. She was rather surprised to see that the girl had been dead on. Sesshoumaru's golden eyes had flown wide and he froze in place. It looked almost funny, but Kagome knew better than to laugh at Sesshoumaru. // Huh. Guess the girl was right. //

Shippo's eyes got pretty big a moment later. Kagome was a bit more surprised at that one, but whatever Shippo's intentions HAD been, they changed abruptly after a short growl from Sesshoumaru. The kitsune snapped his mouth shut and slid back further in his seat.

Sesshoumaru had logically known it was coming, but it was still a shock to him. More shocking than the fact in and of itself was all the thoughts suddenly blooming of their own accord in his brain as his instincts started firing off all sorts of signals. His growl at Shippo had been purely reflexive and made from no conscious thought, warning the kitsune away. The only one that was going to touch his Rin was -

Wait...what?! Sesshoumaru's mind backpedaled furiously from the thought. He wasn't going to be touching her either, he had made that quite clear, even told his Lord Father as much.

It was a hame his instincts didn't seem to care so much about the decisions his mind had made. His inner beast was rankled, and wanted nothing more than to pluck Rin out of this room and take her somewhere alone. Not merely out of a desire to respond to the frightfully enticing scent, but also out of a protective urge to keep her away from everyone else during this time. HIS Rin.

Toga would have picked up on his son's distressed confusion and internal battle fairly quickly, and likely would have been terribly amused. Sesshoumaru made an effort to resume something approaching normal operation, although his actions were tense and he visibly bristled when the servers brought in their food and got too close to Rin. Whether or not the servers noticed her current state or not, they were well trained to pay attention to the mood of their Lord, and they almost fell over themselves in their haste to get out of the room.

Yes, breakfast had been a tense ordeal. Sesshoumaru had finally excused himself smoothly and made a retreat, deciding he needed to get away from the situation immediately...all the while, getting screamed at by his instincts that getting away from his ward was the one thing he absolutely least desired. He should stay there, protect her from anyone that would dare approach her, and he could...could...ARGH, damn instincts!

Sesshoumaru took up a position on the roof of the castle and flopped back onto his mokomoko, angrily watching clouds drift by.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha stalked back over to Naraku, sword resting against his shoulder. "Alright, Naraku, y--"

Naraku peered at him. "Naraku? Is that my name?"

The hanyou's ears twitched. "Yeah. It is."

"And you are?"

"Inuyasha."

The name certainly set off explosions in Naraku's mind and he struggled to grasp at memories that seemed to float just beneath the surface, barely out his reach. "Inuyasha..." Naraku seemed to roll the name around on his tongue, getting a taste for it. Inuyasha fidgeted a bit, feeling decidedly uncomfortable.

"Look, Naraku...you're going to come with me. Either willingly or by force."

"Is that so?"

"Fuckin' right it's so."

"I see. Well, I'm not going anywhere until I finish my lunch."

Inuyasha stared. "You're fucking with me..."

"I assure you, I'm doing no such thing. I am hungry."

"Alright, fine, eat your damn food." Inuyasha plunked down, keeping his sword out on his lap and watching Naraku intently, wholly expecting a trap or a trick at any moment. Kouga leaned up against a tree nearby, shaking his head slowly. Whatever Naraku was up to...he surely couldn't figure it out.

"So, where is it we are going?" Naraku asked finally, dusting a few crumbs off of his haori.

"Western Castle."

"Ye ain't goin' nowheres, unless you hand over the fancy sword and armor...and all the other goodies ye got."

Inuyasha, Kouga, and Naraku all turned to the sound of the gravelly voice. A particularly ugly band of bandits was approaching, weapons drawn and obviously hungry for blood.

"The hell with that, I'm not givin' you anything."

Naraku nodded and stood next to Inuyasha. "I'm with him."

Inuyasha balked and turned to Naraku. "Hey...you...you like...you can't side with me! It's WRONG."

"Well, too bad. I'm certainly not siding with THEM."

The bandits eyed each other curiously, then looked at the hanyou and the kumo.

"But...but dammit, you're Naraku. We can't fight on the same side. Just....sit back down and leave me alone..."

"You're being ridiculous."

"SIT DOWN, DAMMIT!"

"So you'd rather protect me than fight next to me...?"

"Prot--" Inuyasha stopped dead, twitching. Kouga could almost hear the sound of the hanyou's brain shorting out, and the bandits looked on in confusion, wondering what sort of craziness they'd stumbled into.


	98. Chapter 97

Pride (In the Name of Love) 97 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wasn't sure if I was going to get this one done in time. It took a kinda unexpected turn, and I work during the day today so...lol. I hate waffling between day and night shifts, its havoc on my sleep schedule.

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Toga slowly lifted his right arm, flexing his fingers. A slight wince marred his features. // Damn...I must have cooked it a bit more than I thought. At least I can move it again...it should not take much longer. //

After he had stretched and yawned, the taiyoukai slid out of bed and gathered up a change of clothes, making his way to the bath. Stripping was still a bit difficult, what with his arm injured. He slid into the water, hissing sharply as it touched his scorched flesh. // Perhaps this was NOT such a good idea... //

"My Lord Father?...Are you alright?"

Toga's eyes snapped to the door, locking on Sesshoumaru. A tight smile crossed his face. "Heh. I will be. Where have YOU been? I was looking for you for a good while when I returned..."

"I have been...out." Sesshoumaru began systematically disrobing as he spoke. "I did not wish to...deal with a situation that presented itself immediately."

"I see...trouble?"

Sesshoumaru let out a huff as he slid into the water. // Of the worst kind... // "Nothing to concern yourself with." Sesshoumaru calmly reached for Toga's hair.

"I'm not an invalid, you know..." Toga sighed, rather enjoying the claws carefully raking through his hair.

"My Lord Father, I would never think you an invalid or incapable of anything. However...allow this Sesshoumaru to assist you. There is no point in you suffering needlessly. How in all the hells did you burn yourself like that?"

"Meh...by being foolish and consumed with rage. Your brother had to get it from somewhere..."

Sesshoumaru frowned slightly. "It is unlike you to be rash."

"I had that filthy wretch, Jormandar, a few inches in front of my face but could not reach him for his barrier. I tried. Hence the burn. I probably would have gotten it a bit worse if I hadn't had to go to Sairex's defense."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and he froze for a moment. "You...went to that place? THAT was your business?"

"Well...yes. I did not wish to cause you worry." Toga shifted around so he could face Sesshoumaru, his voice soft. "And he has much to pay for. I will not allow the pain he has caused you to go unanswered, my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily, casting a slightly guilty look at Toga's scorched arm. Toga's other hand caught him abruptly under the chin and lifted his gaze, his fingers lightly trailing over the crimson slashes on Sesshoumaru's cheek.

"Do not look so. You must not feel any guilt for anything that happens as a result of this situation. Somehow, ultimately, this is all my fault."

"It is not your fault."

"No, it is. All you have suffered...all that was done to you, all that is still being done...it started as a result of one of MY old enemies. For that, I am deeply sorry. I would rather suffer a thousandfold what you have than to see you hurt, now or ever. It seems I have done you many wrongs, my Sesshoumaru..."

Sesshoumaru blinked. "What?...That is hardly true, my Lord Father...you have been nothing but good to me."

Toga sighed and closed his eyes. "No. I have not. I was....selfish."

The younger inu slowly arched an eyebrow. "How so?"

"It is my fault that you have suffered, and not just because of all that has happened with Tsetsukosei and his ilk. From the day you were born, you were all I had that mattered to me. I poured all my heart into caring for you and making sure you wanted for nothing...and in doing so, entirely monopolized your time. Instead of pushing you more to socialize with others, I allowed you to spend all your time with me...because I enjoyed your presence. It occurred to me what a lonely, solitary life you had begun to lead...but I did nothing to try to resolve the issue. I suppose some part of me rationalized that you surely must find some joys in life outside of the ones you found when in my presence...but I knew better. You always were different around me than you were when around any other. I knew all of these things...but ultimately did little to nothing about them."

"My Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru's voice was something of a shocked whisper.

"I kept you."

"My Lord Father, please...it was not all your doing. I...this Sesshoumaru could not find any joy from the presence of others. They all were measured and found wanting. None can compare to you...no one ever could. I cherished every moment in your keeping." Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and bowed his head. "I belong to you. I always belonged to you, will always belong to you. You have always held my heart and soul in your hands, and can make or break my world. You made me what I am, and never have I regretted it. Do not say my devotion is misguided, that my love is a mistake. You have always been everything in my world. Everything, everyone else...it is simply background noise."

"And yet, long after my death, your heart opened to a human girl, an imp...even your hanyou brother."

"You cannot know how your death broke me. Rin...is a small and brilliant sun no matter how dark the world becomes. She was impossible to resist and helped patch some of the holes in my heart. Inuyasha...I tried so hard to hate him, my Lord Father....I tried so hard to blame him in full for your death, to loathe him because your blood flowed through his veins with that of a human...and yet that is the very same reason I could never truly hate him. He was a part of you. I couldn't kill him. I admit, I tried. Many times. Even though I knew how you would have felt...he was a face and a name for the helpless, frustrated rage I felt at losing you."

"Oh, my Sesshoumaru..." Toga sighed softly. "I am not so sure I deserve such pure devotion...do you not understand? It was wrong of me to keep you, to allow you to shut out the rest of the world and care only for me. Just as I...I fear that our relationship of late...I do not know what ever possessed me to initiate anything intimate with you. Of course you would never think to resist me...but it is unfair of me, and again, selfish. It is...it is an abuse of my status as your father."

Sesshoumaru's eyes were wide and flickering somewhere between hurt and horror. "You...you regret...everything?"

Toga's eyes were full of fierce love. "No. I regret nothing. I have always loved you terribly. You have always been mine, and I have cherished that. I only fear I may have pressured you into it...that I realized your near worship and used it to unfair advantage."

"My Lord Father, this Sesshoumaru, for all my love, is no blind, mindless drone. I have gone into things with open eyes. You have never coerced or pressured or lured me into a thing I did not wish to do. Perhaps you were a major reason in why I never was interested in taking a mate...who could I find to share time with that meant to me what you do? Perhaps...this Sesshoumaru has not merely loved you but been in love with you longer than I have suspected, perhaps most all my life. But I have no regrets. I do not care if the rest of the world views it with abhorrence, as if it were an atrocity. Let them think as they will. All that matters to me is what you think. If this has been a flaw in my upbringing or some fault of yours, if this is wrong...I care not. Do not...do not cast me out. Do not end this out of a misguided sense of it being for my own good. Please."

Toga eyed him for a long moment before a faint smile flickered across his lips. "No, my Sesshoumaru...I have no such intentions. I am not so strong as all that. Even if sometimes I believe I have interfered and that it WOULD be for your own good...I have no wish to be parted from you, no wish to change things. You have claimed you need no others...well, nor do I."

Sesshoumaru felt the tight noose of fear that had been steadily growing within him and clenching around his heart vaporize in a flood of warm, blissful relief. He did not suppose he could speak around the lump that had somehow lodged itself in his throat, so he instead moved to straddle Toga's hips, curling his arms around his neck as he leaned in to give him a kiss. He tried to pour all his love, all his devotion, his relief and his gratitude...all the emotions he was ill able to confess fully into that one simple act.

As he wasn't sure if his first one got the message through quite well enough, Sesshoumaru found himself locked in a long series of deeply intimate kisses that sent fluttering bursts of heat through him. It became readily apparent that he wasn't the only one being affected, however. When he finally pulled back to suck in a ragged breath, it froze in his throat at the smoldering look in his father's eyes.

With a faint, rather mischievous smile, Sesshoumaru wiggled in Toga's lap a bit. Toga smirked at him. "Careful, pup, else you'll be spending more time in this bath than you originally intended."

Sesshoumaru's eyelashes lowered demurely as he spoke. "Ah, of course...since you previously stated you intended to keep this Sesshoumaru up all night and it is not even yet time for dinner, I best not tax your strength..."

Sesshoumaru gasped as Toga's uninjured hand suddenly snapped around his neck from behind and jerked him in close, a mere hairsbreadth from the elder inu. Toga growled softly, although it was not a growl of anger. "I do grow a bit weary of you constantly challenging me in this area...by the time I am done with you this night, my Sesshoumaru, you won't remember your own name for a week, let alone challenge me thus again."

All of Sesshoumaru's teasing - as well as his grip on coherency and reality in general - flew apart as Toga pulled him into a fierce kiss. He broke the kiss only to nip and lick his way to Sesshoumaru's ear, then down the slender line of his throat. The sharp, deep bite he delivered a moment later made Sesshoumaru gasp sharply, his back arching and his claws rather unintentionally digging into Toga's shoulders. A shattered moan escaped him as the elder inu's fingers curled around his cock and began stroking him firmly. For all his treasured self control and mastery over most all situations, Sesshoumaru could never help but be reduced to putty in Toga's hands...and they both knew it.

It was not, however, as if Sesshoumaru had no effect in turn on Toga. The sight of the proud, beautiful creature consumed with passion and writhing in helpless submission to his every whim was an extraordinary aphrodisiac for the inu patriarch. Not to mention that every motion of the wet body in his lap rubbed deliciously against his own aching erection...

Toga mentally cursed his inability to use both hands briefly, but figured he could get by well enough. He abandoned stroking Sesshoumaru's erection despite the soft moan of protest, instead slipping his hand around and wasting little time working his fingers into the boy. Sesshoumaru's groan only incensed him, and the way the younger taiyoukai was rocking his hips against him was maddening.

Sesshoumaru couldn't wait any longer, even if he knew he should give his body a bit more time to adjust. His self control was dashed and Toga was wreaking utter havoc on his senses. Much as he hated to beg for anything...he couldn't do anything but. "Oh gods...please...I need you in me...nn...

Toga let out a soft growl in response, unable to deny the breathless request. Dimly he thought that he probably should have waited a bit more so he didn't hurt Sesshoumaru, but his pup rather took that decision out of his hands. As soon as he had begun pressing his length up into him, Sesshoumaru had shifted position slightly and slammed his hips down, impaling himself fully. Toga let out a somewhat shocked groan.

Sesshoumaru cried out sharply, his eyes rolling back as he struggled to deal with this violent mix of pleasure and pain. It had stung a great deal more than he had expected - gods, he thought he was going to be torn apart! - but it brought with it an excruciating pleasure that slowly grew, inexorably eclipsing the burn. Sesshoumaru shifted slightly, aware of how tortured his groan must have sounded. It wasn't like he was a petite, fragile little thing...but damn, his father was huge.

Toga's eyes opened to the barest slits - Sesshoumaru had indeed sounded tormented. However, whatever anguish his pup was feeling must have not been near as strong as his pleasure. Sesshoumaru lifted his hips before driving back down, another delicious whimper coming from him. Toga's breath hissed out of him at the sharp motion. It felt too good for words, this sweet and forbidden love.

It didn't take long for Sesshoumaru to find a perfect rhythm, impaling himself over and over in a series of hard, deep, smooth thrusts. Every roll of his hips was sending devastating, white-hot pleasure through them both. Sesshoumaru had unintentionally sank his claws into Toga's shoulders again, and the burn of Toga's claws sinking into his hip and pulling him down harder registered as a confused jumble of anguish that was indecipherable from ecstasy.

When Toga's sharp fangs found the juncture of Sesshoumaru's throat and his collarbone and bit in hard, something in Sesshoumaru's mind ruptured, broke under the unexpected shock and unadulterated joy. THIS one would scar, leave him marked. Visibly and undeniably claimed, even if he would choose to hide it from the world. Claimed, claimed by this all-powerful, incredible god of a creature...claimed by his beloved Lord Father...!

Sesshoumaru let out a howl as his orgasm crashed through him almost violently, sparks exploding behind his eyes, eyes that weren't able to make sense out of anything before them. His back arched and his head fell back, powerful spasms wracking his lithe frame.

Toga let out a rather loud noise of his own, unable to hold out against the sudden added pleasure of Sesshoumaru's already impossibly tight body suddenly clenching and spasming around him. His climax overtook him with thunderous force, and he clutched Sesshoumaru tightly until it relented enough to let him draw something of a breath. Toga sank back heavily against the wall of the bath with a soft moan.

Sesshoumaru melted bonelessly against him, although his trembling fingers had slowly lifted to touch the bleeding wound at the base of his throat in wonder and disbelief. He said nothing, however, and simply reveled in it. Internally, his mind was doing a fanciful jig of celebration. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and let the ghost of a smile drift across his lips.

No matter what happened, he was suddenly sure that things would end up alright.


	99. Chapter 98

Pride (In the Name of Love) 98 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Tomorrow's posting will be almost assuredly be late, as I am working first shift (7a-3p). Sorry to all my early morning readers!

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Sesshoumaru was in something of a blissful daze as he made his way to the dining hall. Toga smirked, vaguely amused and really quite pleased to see his pup in such a good mood. Lost in his own thoughts, Toga almost crashed into Sesshoumaru when he stopped dead in front of the doorway to the dining room.

"Ah...we stopped why, exactly?"

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily and mumbled something unintelligible under his breath.

"Indeed. Good answer."

"...I had forgotten. The...issue...I spoke of earlier is as yet unresolved."

"What issue would that be?"

Sesshoumaru's expression was flat. "Rin."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "You are having a problem with the girl? I can't possibly fathom wh--" He paused in mid-sentence as his nose caught the faint scent from the other room. "Ohhhh...I see."

Sesshoumaru refused to look at him. "I do not know what to do."

"When did you first discover this?"

"Breakfast."

Toga bit back a grin. He could only imagine the scenario and was terribly sorry that he missed it. "Well, its really up to you what you do...but you do need to act in some way. You cannot simply blow it off."

"I can't?" Sesshoumaru muttered.

"Of course not. Tell me, my Sesshoumaru, do you still intend to mate this girl?"

Sesshoumaru's cheeks were abruptly red and he didn't answer - in truth, he didn't really have one.

Toga gave him a very serious look. "My Sesshoumaru...look at me." He waited until Sesshoumaru's eyes were on him before continuing. "It would not offend me to share you with this girl should you so desire. I can understand that you may wish children of your own in the future. Details of how that would work within our own relationship are as yet unimportant. However, allow me to give you a bit of advice."

"This Sesshoumaru does not really need advising in this area..."

"But you do. I daresay I know you better than anyone else does, perhaps better than you know yourself at times. I know you do not wish to deal with this because you are unsure of what to do, be it out of concern for the fact that you are mine, out of concern for the fact she is human...I do not know your precise motivations. But do not do her the injustice of not doing anything at all. The girl cares for you in much the way you care for me. She will not act on her own. And why should she think to, in truth? You DID mark her as your own."

"It was..." Sesshoumaru stopped. What had it been? Yes, a mark of possession...which any demon would give a mate. Had it been a promise as well, or simply a mark to try to offer her protection? Did it count? // I knew I would be gone for a time, but I had not truly thought I'd be held captive beyond escape on my own merit...so I had intended to come back...but....//

"You do not need to make an immediate decision, my Sesshoumaru...relax. You will strain something. You are over-analyzing, I assure you. The question is ultimately simple and should not be dictated by your logic, but by your heart. You merely need time to sort out your feelings...and I assure you, it is necessary. You must decide if your possessive, territorial nature towards the girl is because y ou consider her for a mate or because you consider her your ward. Do you grow so protective and dominant in an effort to protect her as your ward or because the idea of anyone else touching her makes you burn with jealous ire?"

"You are too damn wordy sometimes."

Toga burst out laughing. "That is funny, coming from YOU."

"Hn. This Sesshoumaru does not wax eloquent on every possible issue."

"Well, 'this Sesshoumaru' is trying to deflect me from the issue at hand by changing the subject, but I'll let it slide. I need not say more."

"Are you mocking me?"

"Not at all. I never understood why you referred to yourself thus."

Sesshoumaru opened his mouth to respond, then closed it. Well, why DID he refer to himself as 'this Sesshoumaru'? He didn't really know. It was just something he'd always done. Before Sesshoumaru could finish that train of thought, he found himself suddenly pinned against the wall, a pair of golden eyes smoldering as they stared into his own. Toga's voice was a low, husky growl.

"Whatever you do decide in regards to the girl...you will inform me. As I said...I will share, as I know your love for me is unflawed and cannot be replaced or marred no matter how you feel for another...but you are still MINE, and as such, I have a right to remain in the loop. Do you understand, my Sesshoumaru?"

"Yes, my Lord Father."

Toga smiled and gave Sesshoumaru a soft kiss. "Good. Now let us join them for dinner before they rather correctly assume we are late because I could not keep my hands off of you." Toga paused, musing. "Though it was really more your own fault than mine this time around."

"I blame you anyway. You were the one that was undressed first."

"I was taking a bath, of course I was undressed."

"Details... Hn. I have many years of complete chastity to make up for. I am a young demon in the prime of my life and thus I am entirely not at fault for my own actions. And since I cannot be placed at blame, that leaves it on you."

Toga rolled his eyes. "Ah, forgive me for allowing facts to get in the way of your logic."

"You are supposed to be the responsible one and prevent me from getting into mischief regardless."

"Oh, hush, you brat. Get in that room before I have to throw you over my shoulder and take you there myself."

Sesshoumaru smirked before heading into the dining hall - after all, he had a feeling that if he didn't, Toga would make good on that threat.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex slowly flickered open his eyes. It took a few moments for them to focus. Gingerly he tested to see if his hands and feet were working properly, and was pleased to find that he was almost wholly healed. The wounds had been deep, but very narrow and closed quickly.

His gaze slowly shifted around the room as he propped himself up on an elbow. He couldn't help but grin. Miroku hadn't noticed him yet, as the monk's attention was focused solely on the baby in his arms. He was chatting quietly with her and had her absolutely fascinated with a small stuffed bird. Where he had gotten it, Sairex could only wonder. Sairex watched them for a few minutes before finally speaking. "You know, zhe IS adorable, but I daresay I am a bit better conversationalist."

"Sairex! You're awake!"

"Meh. I vasn't hurt too badly, just incapacitated and in need of rest. How is Toga?"

Miroku snorted. "Oh, don't worry about him. His arm was burned but he was otherwise none the worse for wear. He had the energy to trap me against the wall and make me think he intended to do something perverse to me."

Sairex arched an eyebrow, then chuckled. "Oh, dat I vould have liked to have zeen. Perhaps he vould be villing to do a reenactment for me."

Miroku's eyes widened. "I think I'm rubbing off on you...pervert."

"Oh, I'm not about to ask any zuch ting. Zezzhoumaru vould kill you, me, or both. I am not zo zure he is inclined to zhare."

"Speaking of, breakfast was interesting this morning. Something was going on, but I don't know what. Sesshoumaru was acting strange...Shippo picked up on it, I can only guess he smelled something...but Sesshoumaru shut him up really fast. I wish you had been there, you could have filled me in."

Sairex rolled his eyes. "Kaa, you have been around beasts too much. You have to remember, love...I do not possess da zame extraordinary zense of zmell dey all do. I'm a bird. I do have fairly keen vision and I can fly. I tink its not a bad exchange, really."

"You're right. Mm...it is just about time for dinner...would you care to join me?"

"Yes. Zome food vould be good for me."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"So...er....can you hand over your things now?" One of the bandits finally asked.

Inuyasha glared at them and waved Tetsusaiga. "SHUT UP! I'll deal with you in a minute!" He returned his glare to Naraku. "You just... just...."

Naraku rolled his eyes. He bent down and picked up a couple of small rocks. He threw one at Inuyasha, and then whipped the other at a bandit. The bandit was nowhere near as fast as Inuyasha and yelped as it clipped his head.

"Hey!"

Inuyasha repeated the exclamation - despite his block, the assault had surprised him. "Hey! What the FUCK was that for?"

Naraku sat back down on his rock. "Now I am not being protected by you. I attacked you both. The fact that you are destroying the bandits is simply due to the fact that they are after your things. They are the bigger threat, however, and must be dealt with first. Happy? Carry on." The kumo picked up his tea and took a sip, frowning slightly. Dammit, it had grown cold...

"Who said we were getting destroyed?" The bandit glared angrily at Naraku. Naraku glanced at him irritably.

Kouga sighed and stepped in. "Look, ya morons. You're a buncha filthy low-class humans. I'm a full-fledged demon, King of the northern wolf tribe and General in the army of the Inu no Taisho. HE is Lord Inuyasha, the son of the Inu no Taisho, Lord of these lands. And him...well. Fuck. I don't really know whats going through his head, but that's fuckin' Naraku and he ain't human and...mind you, this is no compliment....he's no damn weakling. Any one of us could crush you like the insects you are and not even break a sweat."

The bandits frowned uneasily. They hadn't realized exactly what they were dealing with. One of them glanced towards Naraku. "You don't seem like one of them."

"I'm not. I think I'm their prisoner, but I'm not quite sure."

"Not sure? Well...join us, then, and we'll share the goods!"

Naraku scowled in distaste. "I think I'd rather go with them to...where did you say we were going?"

Inuyasha twitched. "Western castle."

"That is not a very original name."

Inuyasha's ears flattened. "I didn't name the damn place. And what makes you think you have a choice on whether or not you go with us?"

"I could escape."

"Why don't you, then?" Inuyasha grinned smugly.

Naraku paused to consider. "Because I haven't finished my tea."

Inuyasha felt that terrible headache resurging in his head, right between his eyes. He wasn't sure how much more of this Naraku he could take.


	100. Chapter 99

Pride (In the Name of Love) 99 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wow. There are two very common themes with my recent reviews, and both crack me up. First, there are the people growling for Rin to find her own mate and leave Sesshoumaru alone...XD. Amusing as that is, allow me to point out that ... well, she hasn't done anything....at all. Just got older.

And then there are the people rallying for an Inu / Kouga / Naraku threesome. O.o Alright. I understand that there is a certain suspension of disbelief that must come with any fanfic and a modification of facts and all that good junk. And I understand that I have relationships present here that, while breaching moral code and questionable in content, have plenty of logical backing. Er...Pretty as Naraku is and fond as I am of the baddies, really... I don't think...Inuyasha would want to touch him with a ten foot pole under any circumstances after their past. Kouga either. LOL.... but who knows, with as crazy as this story gets.

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Dinner was an interesting affair, to say the least. Toga paused for a moment before heading off to the kitchen, drawing a raised eyebrow from Sesshoumaru. The younger taiyoukai could not possibly fathom why his father would wander off to join the servants while they worked to prepare the meal, but he let it slide. His gaze inevitably slid to Rin.

Rin, for the most part, was being dead quiet and blushing a great deal. This disturbed Sesshoumaru on several levels - usually, it was a struggle to get the girl to keep quiet. He bit back a sigh. His father was...of course, curse him...right. No matter what things he DID decide, he would have to chat with the girl. Better to do it sooner than later. It...bothered him to think she was acting so upset and un-Rin-like because of him.

"Rin. Come." Without bothering to see if the girl would follow - he knew she would, she always did - he slid out of the room into the relative privacy of the hallway. Once he was sure they were alone and out of earshot, he turned to look at her.

"Rin. Look at me."

Hesitantly she lifted her gaze and offered him a somewhat wobbly smile.

"Why are you so distressed, Rin?"

Rin blinked. It wasn't like Sesshoumaru-sama to directly show such concerns for her or anyone. Her blush deepened, but she did her best to answer honestly. "Rin ... Rin is an adult now but is afraid of what you might think of it."

Sesshoumaru snorted before gracing her with an expression that was halfway one of his rare smiles, half a smirk. "Rin, this Sesshoumaru isn't going to think less of you simply because you are maturing. You can not be held accountable."

"But you looked so angry at breakfast..."

Sesshoumaru sighed heavily, and Rin was rather taken aback. Her Lord was showing visible signs of confusion and concern, as well as a good deal of trepidation. "Rin, this Sesshoumaru is going to tell you something. And you will not repeat it to any others. Do you understand?"

"Yes, Sesshoumaru-sama. Rin won't tell anyone!"

"First...I...I seemed angry this morning because now that you are an adult, other demons may seek you as their mate. This thought was unpleasant for me. I do not, in honesty, know how to think of you."

Rin blinked, but remained silent.

"Some part of me decided a long while ago that, when you were of age, this Sesshoumaru would take you as a mate. But then things happened. While I do not think less of you, I am uncertain as to my ability to...properly care for a mate, let alone pups. There is more. I...will not take you as a mate if I cannot give you what it is you deserve, and I am not so sure I can do that. I will not give you only half of me and leave your heart barren, or merely use you to gain an heir of my own. It is more complicated than that, however. I do not know how it would be that I would react, should I make such an effort. I do not know if my heart can be thus shared, and it worries me that you will not keep options open were I to try. No matter if this Sesshoumaru does or does not take you as a mate, I....care enough for you that I only want to see you happy."

"I am not sure I wholly understand, and I don't see why it's a big secret..."

Sesshoumaru stared at the floor for a long moment. "The secret is related to what I tell you now. The reason I am not sure if I can care for you appropriately is that...this Sesshoumaru already has a mate. I am...claimed."

Rin's eyes almost popped out of her head at those words, and grew impossibly larger still when he pulled down the collar of his haori enough to reveal the still rather messy bite-mark at his throat. Rin abruptly let out a delighted squeal and flew forward, giving him an excited hug. "That's wonderful, Sesshoumaru-sama!" She blinked as she thought hard, running through possibilities in her head. "But the only one you spend much time with is..."

"My Lord Father, yes. I will not make unnecessary threats to detail what will befall you should you breathe a word of it to anyone. It must not be known. They would not understand, and it would bring great trouble to this House."

Rin nodded seriously. "I won't tell anyone. Thank you for confiding in me, Lord Sesshoumaru."

"It was necessary to make you understand. I want....for you to be happy, Rin. I am uncertain if that happiness could lie with me, and I do not want you to withhold from other opportunities should they arise. I am...too unsure of myself at this time to grant you any insight as to my personal intentions...but I do not wish for you to wander about as you are, silent and melancholy."

Rin flashed him a smile that eclipsed the sun. "Rin understands. And no matter what...Rin is happy for you. You need to smile more, Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Before Sesshoumaru could fathom a response, the girl bounced back into the other room, leaving him standing there. He shook his head slowly in amazement and confusion. Females were baffling creatures. Well, at least the girl seemed relieved and happy, even if he was no less unsure of himself.

The meal itself progressed fairly smoothly. Toga was rather flustered for most of it. His arm was healing rapidly, to be sure, but it still hurt a good deal to try to use it. Being right-handed...and attempting to eat left-handed...made for a rather frustrating meal.

The reason for the inu patriarch's trip to the kitchens became apparent at the end of the meal. A grand cake was brought out, and Toga flashed a grin to the rest of them. "A tribute to both the Lady Rin's coming of age...and a congratulations to your new child." He tipped his glass to Sairex and Miroku.

Once everyone had resumed chatting happily and offering their general congratulations, Toga's good hand slid under the table and rested lightly on Sesshoumaru's knee, drawing his pup's attention. His sire's voice was soft, and Sesshoumaru strongly doubted any of the others heard it. "And to...other significant events."

A smile spread across Sesshoumaru's face before he could hide it. He knew he was blushing, but right now...just this once....Sesshoumaru decided to forgive himself his lack of emotional control.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha whined and beat his head against a tree. Kouga patted his back somewhat awkwardly.

"Kouga, I don't know how much more of this mind-fucking I can take. I'd rather he was trying to kill us."

"Heh...I'm sure it could be worse..."

"He's a fucking brain ninja! BRAIN NINJA! Arrrgh, my damn head is going to explode!"

"We only need to get him back to the castle and then you don't have to deal with him anymore."

Inuyasha scowled at the empty loops of rope that had once been wrapped around the kumo. "Yeah...whatever..."

The rest of the day, after the encounter with the bandits, had been terribly frustrating for Kouga and Inuyasha both. Naraku had finally decided to allow them to take him prisoner, provided they promised him a good solid meal when they got there. He said he was tired of eating on the road.

Figuring it was easier to accept this relatively simple term than to argue, Inuyasha had grudgingly agreed. Neither Inuyasha or Kouga felt secure with Naraku as a prisoner, and so they elected to tie him up.

This seemed to work until Inuyasha and Kouga felt the ropes go slack. Naraku had stepped right through them, his body flowing around them, as he wandered off a short ways to examine something that had caught his eye. The kumo seemed curious about most everything and enjoyed pausing to check things out, hoping something would spur some spark of recognition.

Noting Inuyasha and Kouga's distress, Naraku had mildly walked back and slid into the ropes again before giving an imperious gesture for them to carry on.

Naraku, for the most part, had agreed to go along for personal reasons. A good dinner would be nice, but this was the first castle he had heard of. It sounded like the perfect place to take over. He just...couldn't help that he kept getting distracted and had nothing resembling a decent attention span of late. Thinking too much, especially trying to remember things or plot things out logically...it really made his head hurt. It was like there was some sort of major gap in his brain that refused to allow things to cross properly. Too much focus and he'd find himself toppling painfully down the steep slope into that gap, only to climb out with blank spots and a nasty headache.

When he returned to 'captivity', Naraku decided to try and poke for more information. "So...what is this western castle like?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "Its...big. And...er...castle-ish."

Kouga snorted. "You're so descript..."

"Oh, bite me, fleabait."

"You wish."

Inuyasha flipped a rather mean smirk in Naraku's direction. "Man, I don't know how things are gonna go. My brother is gonna shit a chicken at the sight of you."

Naraku blinked slowly. "I...see. Why?"

"He fuckin' HATES you."

"He does? Why would he hate me?"

"Well, besides the fact that you tried to get him in your body?"

Naraku blinked slowly. "What does he look like?"

Kouga smirked. "Like mutt-face here, only prettier."

"Oh. I must have good taste, then." Naraku smiled, pleased.

Inuyasha blinked, then flailed. "You damn pervert, I didn't mean like THAT! You...you fucking like...absorb demons into you and steal their powers!"

"Oh. I see. It didn't make much sense to me, anyways...I think I would prefer to be doing the taking."

Inuyasha cackled. "Yeah, sure, you go tell Sesshoumaru you want to take him. We'll see how far that gets you."

"Really, Inuyasha, you should learn to be more civil. You too, Kouga. You're both quite crass and vulgar. Not very refined, for being such high-ranking nobles. Do all in the Western Castle behave like you two?"

"Oh, shut the hell up, Naraku."

"You were the one that wanted to bring me home."

"No, I wanted to kill you."

"Well, that's not very nice." Naraku frowned.

"...I fucking hate you."

"But I like you."

Inuyasha gaped. "NO, you DON'T."

"I certainly am a better judge of that than you. Besides, you have cute ears." Naraku gave Inuyasha a cheery grin and reached over to grab an ear before the horrified hanyou could protest.

Inuyasha ripped away fast enough that he almost lost the ear, but he would have considered it a small price to pay for freedom.

"Fucking mind-raping brain ninja, Kouga....DAMN it..."


	101. Chapter 100

Pride (In the Name of Love) 100 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Chapter One Hundred. Damn. Never intended things to go this far, I really didn't...and there is no end in sight. It's been a hell of a journey thus far, and hopefully it will continue for a while yet. Hard to believe this story started on March 21st. I've only missed a very few days of updates in there. You reader sorts and your reviews have made it all worthwhile. Thank you, and I'll be looking forward to all the reviews of the future.

I'll again take ideas for sidestories to work on in my extra time, should anyone have one they wish to see.

As for my updates...they are unlikely to be regularly timed as they have been. My boss has seen fit to more or less switch me to day shift...which is good. Its a much better job than night shift is, even if I don't mind the overnight hours. But since most days I'll be going in fairly early in the morning, I probably won't get updates out until the evenings. I'll attempt to keep them daily, but I can no longer guarantee what time of day.

Anyhow, love y'all and enjoy a special double-length chapter 100.

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Toga sighed in blissful relief as he sat on the edge of the cliff overlooking the sea, watching the sun set. Another hour or so and his arm should be more or less repaired. It had finally gotten to the point where he was able to yank off the layer of dead stuff. While that had stung a good deal, it meant that his arm was healed save for the outer surface. The pain had been sharp but was fading rapidly. Toga knew from past experience that it would feel tight and stiff for a while, but that would fade.

So caught up in poking and prodding at his injury as he was, he didn't notice that he had been snuck up on until Sairex spoke. "That's disgusting."

Toga's spine stiffened and he refrained from jumping only out of sheer force of will. Sairex chuckled and sat down next to him. "I know, you hate vhen I do dat."

"I'll let it pass, just this once. I'm in a fairly good mood. What's disgusting, by the way?"

"You peeled yourzelf like a fruit. Ugh."

Toga chuckled. "It was necessary. Besides, it feels so much better without all that itchy dead skin and such." The inu patriarch glanced sidelong at the raven. "Mm. That look really does suit you a lot more than those shapeless things you've worn of late. You are a beautiful creature and it accents you perfectly."

Sairex blushed a bit. "Kaa...I'm ztill on da fence about it. I know da look vorks for me, it just...brings back memories."

Toga grinned a bit, eyes flicking towards the sandy beach below the cliff's edge. "Mm. So does this place."

The raven's cheeks burned brighter. "Da zignificance is not lost on me. But reminiscing about da beginning of our romance in da days of yore is not why I have come."

"Oh? Is something the matter?"

"You know dat I can zee glimpses of da future if I make da effort. Or possible futures, at any rate."

"Yes, of course."

"I don't know vhat is happening or how it vill happen, but ve only have a very zhort time. Its...curious. Da var I zaw coming before is not da var coming to you now. Da East and North both have vithdrawn. Da Zouth, if dey vere at all zmart, zhould have done zo as vell...but I fear dey march, vith Jormandar behind dem. Even zo...vith your own armies and da might of you and your zons and your allies...I do not tink dey have a chance to zucceed, logically. Zpeaking from da point of view of a tactician, all advantages are yours. Dis var vould hurt you but I do not tink dey can vin."

"It's good to hear you being optimistic. That bodes well, considering you are generally not..."

Sairex frowned uneasily. "Vell, I have da feeling zometing is going to go wrong. Dere is zome factor ve are overlooking. I don't tink ve ztand any chance of losing dis var...I'm not even certain ve vill lose a terrible amount of lives. But zometing is...not right."

"How long, do you think?"

Sairex shook his head. "I don't know. Just...be careful, and be on your guard."

"Of course. Something is bothering me, though..."

Sairex arched an eyebrow. "Vhat?"

"How do they consistently know so much about us? How do they know when to strike, where to strike...without fail. We have not intercepted them once, and even when the two of us went to go visit Jormandar, he did not seem overly shocked to see us. Mildly surprised, but not shocked."

Sairex nodded slowly, musing. "Noting new has breached your defenses...but perhaps...ve missed zometing dat vas dere before dey vere put up. I vill look into it."

"Thank you...you know, I have had reason to wonder why it is that this Tsetsukosei developed such a grudge against me in the first place. Surely he wouldn't harbor such a long-standing, expensive grudge solely because I denied a ridiculous request."

"Vell...I'm not really zure."

Toga sighed. "Ah, well." He lifted his arm and flexed it, pleased to find that it didn't pain him much at all. "At least this is better. Which is good, I needed this arm tonight."

Sairex quirked an eyebrow. "You do? For vhat?"

Toga smirked. "To prove a point. I was challenged."

Sairex shook his head and snickered. "I'm not going to ask...how are tings between you and Zezzhoumaru?"

"I marked him earlier this evening. I am finished deliberating with myself and worrying about the consequences."

"Ah, vell, dat explains vhy he vas grinning and in a daze for half of dinner. I don't tink he even realized it."

Toga chuckled. "Well, I AM pretty great, anyone would be lucky."

Sairex snorted. "Hmph, you're a dog. Dogs ZO aren't my ztyle."

"Eh, but you never had one quite like me."

"Feh. You can't even fl--...vell. Never mind, I guess you can fly. But not as vell as I can."

"Grasping for any thread of superiority?"

"I hardly need to. I could defeat you at any time I vish."

Toga arched an eyebrow and turned to face Sairex. "Oh really...I somehow doubt that."

The raven grinned wider. "It'd be fairly easy, actually. You vouldn't fight me whole-heartedly, and all I vould have to do to make you ztop entirely and thus give me da fight vould be, yknow..." Sairex suddenly pulled an anguished expression, tears welling up in wide yellow eyes as he dramatically collapsed. Even fully expecting something of the sort, Toga's eyes widened and he resisted the urge to make sure something wasn't actually wrong. The raven was, apparently, a rather good actor.

Sairex chuckled and propped himself up on an elbow. "Zee? Den you fall to pieces and I perform zome grand and powerful act of trickery...and you fall."

"Hn. As if a little bird like you could ever hope to fill my position."

"Luckily for you, dis bird has no desire to dethrone you. Vhat dis bird DOES need to do, however, is head back inside. I can't let da monk raise my baby by himzelf...even if he does zeem to love da task."

"She's adorable. You do have my congratulations."

Sairex smiled. "Kaa, tank you...vould you ever have thought, after all dese years and all dat happened, I'd ever end up vith a pure-blooded heir? It erases zo much of vhat I fought for."

"Your race is not evil by birth, you're proof of that."

"Heh, you're too kind. Ve both know I've done zome terrible tings in my life vithout batting an eyelash. I'm not zo pure-hearted. In fact, I really am zurprised dat Aziraphe didn't kill me vhen zhe had da chance."

"Well, if she had, believe me, there would have been hell to pay." Toga nodded grimly. Oh yes. And he would have collected on that debt personally.

"As I zaid, you're too kind." Sairex paused for a long moment after standing up. "Miroku zays you pinned him against a vall..."

Toga burst out laughing. "Ah. Yes, he really wasn't expecting that one. I just felt a need to...mm. One-up the hentai at his own game."

Sairex chuckled. "Indeed. I imagine da look on his face vas priceless."

"Never saw him stutter so much. He's usually fairly eloquent."

"Vell, enough talk. I'd end up out here all night vith you."

"Like old times, eh?"

"Er...vell..."

"Minus the moaning and writhing on the beach?"

Sairex blushed at the rakish grin on Toga's face. "You really ARE a beast. You're already taken and zo am I, zo behave yourzelf..."

"I assure you, I am a saint and have no naughty intentions."

"Kaa. You. A zaint...pfft." Sairex smirked and then walked over, leaning down and pressing a kiss to Toga's forehead. "Goodnight."

Toga eyed him for a long moment before nodding. "Goodnight."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga, as it turned out, did make perfectly good on his answer to Sesshoumaru's challenge. Once he had secured his pup in the room for the night, he pulled him close with a devious grin. "Remember how I said I would keep you up all night and prove that I could not only keep up with you, but far surpass you? I hope you're well rested, I wouldn't want any excuses..."

Sesshoumaru soon learned that Toga wasn't at all kidding. He made love to him in so many different ways that Sesshoumaru rapidly lost count - although counting to three might have been a struggle with the way his brain began to melt. Toga finished him off with an almost agonizingly slow and impossibly long and gentle session that ended in an orgasm that Sesshoumaru had thought must surely kill him from intensity.

Sesshoumaru was left, in the end, barely able to so much as twitch a finger and in a complete daze. The only fact that registered on him, before he succumbed to sheer blissful exhaustion, was the tiny line of pale gray sky he could see through a crack in the curtains as dawn started to threaten. It really HAD been all night. // Damn... //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei grinned ferally as his rapidly moving army finally was met with the black horde sweeping through the shadows, fading in and out of the Black Circle as they moved, almost invisible to the naked eye. It took a bit of convincing - Shimaku's generals were none too thrilled by the sight or stench of the dark and shadowy things moving with them, but the promise of treasure drove them onward. They would be in sight of their goal by nightfall. None questioned where their Lord had gotten this strange magic that allowed them to move so swiftly without exhausting themselves.

In truth, they WERE wearing down their bodies. But Tsetsukosei didn't care. The spell he and Jormandar had woven would assure that they didn't feel their fatigue. The strain would almost undoubtedly kill them, as their bodies desperately needed to rest despite how they felt - or didn't feel, as the caes may be...but neither of the Circle Lords cared how many of them died. They were as unimportant as the actual war. If they caused some damage to the West in the process of obtaining their ultimate goal, so be it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha was startled awake by a distant rumble. He opened his eyes and peered around, trying to figure out what the noise was. // Thunder? //

He realized he didn't hear it any longer and frowned, laying back down. Before he could re-snuggle Kouga, however, his ear picked up the sound again, through the ground. Something massive was moving. // I don't like the sounds of this. // He nudged Kouga with an elbow until the wolf woke up.

"Eh, what th...hey, what is that?"

"You hear it too?"

"Yeah. Hey, Naraku..." Kouga flipped a pebble at Naraku's face. The sleeping kumo had caught it and dissolved it in his grasp before he even fully awoke. "Get up, we have to move."

The three of them soon found the source of the noise. An army that defied counting was moving swiftly, almost at a run, in a dead line for the Western Castle. Inuyasha and Kouga both felt innumerable demonic auras and caught glimpses of dark things weaving in and out of reality.

"Oh...FUCK..."

Neither Kouga or Naraku bothered to disagree with that statement.

"Kouga, you're faster than I am. I'll stay with spider-boy and you get your scrawny ass home about all this. They...it looks like the Southern Lord's crest."

"I'm on it. Hurry home, we'll need you."

"I'll beat them there. Just...GO."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It was early in the afternoon when a rather exhausted Kouga came bursting through the doors. Everyone had just sat down for lunch. Well, most everyone. For Sesshoumaru and Toga it was more like breakfast, considering how late they had slept in.

Toga blinked at the sudden intrusion. "Kouga?"

Kouga fought to catch his breath and, as soon as he was able, relayed his report. All thoughts of lunch were promptly forgotten.

Toga cast Sairex a rueful glance. "Soon, you said..."

"Vell, if I had known it vas DIS zoon, I vould have varned you."

Toga turned his glance to Sesshoumaru, who was already heading for the door. "I will contact our allies and see how many of them can arrive before it is too late, my Lord Father."

"And I will muster our own forces. Sairex..."

"No vorries. I'll make sure the non-combatants vithin the castle valls are zafe, and prepare vhat defenses I can. Come, Miroku."

"Suppose that leaves me to round up my wolves..." Kouga hastened out the door to begin his preparations.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha arrived home with Naraku in tow roughly an hour ahead of the approaching horde. He knew it was pointless to confine Naraku in a cell, since the slippery kumo could just slide through the bars. He instead brought him to a guest room, ordered room service, and asked him if he would PLEASE stay there. Naraku had debated for a moment, then agreed.

// Should this castle be taken...or at least have its defenses damaged...it will be far easier for me to make a move. Although I really don't know if I will. The hanyou seems nice. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It was the proverbial calm before the storm. Toga always had kept his defenses ready to go at a moment's notice - in a time period as tumultuous as the one he lived in, and being the Lord of such a prime territory, it was only logical to stay on your toes.

Toga stood in front of the front gates silently. Sounga was braced in front of him, blade to the ground. Toga's hands were folded over the pommel. The inu patriarch stood stock still, eyes scanning the horizon as he sought a glimpse of their enemy. Sesshoumaru stood next to him, likewise in full battle armor, although he had not yet elected to draw a weapon. Neither of them said a word.

The only ones moving hastily about the castle, actually, were Miroku and Sairex. The two were putting the finishing touches on some of the magical defenses.

Both inu Lords turned as Inuyasha headed out to join them, standing on Toga's other side. A grim, fierce grin flickered onto his sire's face.

// Both my pups, dressed for war and fighting at my side...I'm not glad for the fight, but I am proud of them. //

Sairex flew up and turned, peering towards the horizon, before calling down to Toga. "Dey come. Just over dat hill."

Toga nodded and stretched before lifting his blade. "Well then, no sense in withholding our welcome." Without further ado, the Western Army marched to meet the invaders with the three inu at the lead.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei blinked in surprise as he saw the dark line of the approaching army. // Oh-ho...they found out we were coming. No matter. // He turned towards his troops and held up a hand to stop them before speaking. "My friends, it seems the West is spoiling for war and has come out to meet us, with the foolish dogs spear-heading the way. Take them down first, should the opportunity present itself. The one to bring me the head of Toga or Inuyasha will have anything they desire for the rest of their days!"

A cheer went up amidst the bloodthirsty bandits. One of them peered at Tsetsukosei curiously. "Eh? Just those two? What about the third, Sesshoumaru?"

"I will take care of him personally." Tsetsukosei whirled as he crested the top of the hill, watching as the Western army continued their steady march towards them. He knew the living part of his army were already on their last legs from the impossibly long run, but they didn't matter. All that matters was that they bought him enough time, enough of a distraction. "CHARGE!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga stared in surprise at the sight of Shimaku standing on the hill. He had been absolutely certain the serpent Lord was dead, killed in that meeting at Kanjiro's claws. And yet there he was, standing high as a tide of roaring youkai surged around him, all eager for blood. Toga exchanged a nod with his boys, and then lifted his own blade high. The West joined the fight, led by an impossibly bright explosion of energy as all three of the inu clan unleashed their blades' powers against the opposition.

The battle was joined.

The Western army lost several of the weaker youkai and humans amidst their ranks, but were in general decimating the opposition with far greater ease than they would have anticipated. Shimaku never budged from his rock.

The three inus were fighting in a rough triangle shape, wading through the throng with devastating force. It seemed as though the three of them could easily have destroyed the entire invading force on their own. Perhaps they could have.

The shadow-creatures of Jormandar's army joined in next, and things became far more complicated. They proved to be much tougher, faster targets. They were still no match for the frightful force of the inuyoukai, but they took their toll on the rank and file.

Sairex scowled and leapt airborne. Something was not right, he could feel it. // All these soldiers...at least the living ones...they've been ensorceled. They are beyond exhaustion, it is why they fall so easy...but why? Why would the Southern Lord push his army with such desperate haste? Surely he must have known they would be decimated. Even with Jormandar's army, we have the advantage. Losses will be heavier than I anticipated, but still...something is wrong. //

With a loud battle cry in his native tongue, the raven began raining down nastily enchanted darts on the approaching horde, moving through the air with a grace and speed that far eclipsed his ability to move when ground-bound.

Toga finally turned from scything his way through the mob and let out a challenging roar in Shimaku's direction. "SHIMAKU!"

Tsetsukosei smiled fiendishly as the inu lord began carving a path to him. // Perfect. You have waited too long. I am already prepared. Come for me... //

Toga led the charge, with Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru wreaking devastation amidst Shimaku's personal guard and the other heavier powered monsters surrounding the serpent lord.

"You were killed, Shimaku!"

"And you have been dead for over two hundred years, Toga. Do you think you are the only one with the means of resurrection?"

"Why do you attack?! You know this was not my fault, you were the first to fight Kanjiro!"

"I will not allow his death to go unanswered!"

Sesshoumaru kept tabs on the exchange between his father and the southern lord, although he was a bit more concerned with the rather nasty and resilient beast he was fighting. With a final grim slice, he brought the beast to its knees. His next slice severed its head.

Sesshoumaru began to turn towards his next target when the ground suddenly heaved beneath him. Stone and earth flew as something massive broke free. It was a bony, obsidian-black foot tipped with nasty claws, each claw easily as big as the taiyoukai's body.

Sesshoumaru grinned internally as he squared off. // The bigger the are, the harder they fall...and all that. //

Another taloned foot tore free, and the ground rumbled. A massive, spiked spinal colum tore free, followed by the long line of a neck and a skull-like head. Smoky crimson eyes flared to life in empty sockets.

The taiyoukai let out a strangled gasp as sudden recognition flared in his mind. Though bigger and with flesh and heavy black scales, he recognized the bony, undead fiend. Tsetsukosei.

Toga skidded to a stop in surprise as Shimaku's body ceased responding and fell before him, eyes vacant. The southern army that was near enough to see let out startled gasps and ran towards their fallen lord. All eyes turned, however, at the tremendous explosion of sound as the earth was shaken and the dracolich burst free.

Sesshoumaru screamed at his body to move, but his mind seemed frozen. This horrible thing was still alive?...How? HOW could it be?!

Tsetsukosei's wings flexed and he let out a tremendous roar. The entire battle had paused as everyone turned to gape at him, seeming caught under a fearful and breathless spell.

Toga was the first to move, lunging forward at full speed. He shoved Sounga into its sheath as he transformed. Powerful muscles flexed as he launched himself at Tsetsukosei with a frightful noise of his own. The dragon was larger than him at his fullest size, although not by much.

A barrier sizzled as Toga collided with it, and Tsetsukosei's eyes turned to Toga. The monster let out a hideous chuckle. Around them, the battle was resumed as both sides began trying to take advantage of the surprise of the other.

Sesshoumaru's eyes were wide and his breath was coming in short gasps. He felt faint and ... afraid. Nightmares flooded his brain, memories of the horrendous torture he had suffered at this very beast's claws.

Toga bristled angrily and again lunged at Tsetsukosei. The dracolich was surprised to find a fiercely grinning Inuyasha near his feet. Right before Toga impacted with the barrier, said barrier dissolved from the swing of Tetsusaiga. The dracolich eyed the crimson blade for a moment before he had to turn his full attention to the enraged, feral inu at his throat. Had he a need to breathe or have blood flow through his veins, death would have taken him. Toga's assault was powerful enough to bowl the dracolich over.

Sesshoumaru snapped out of his frozen paralysis and growled softly. There was NO WAY he was going to allow this thing any more power over him. None. Tsetsukosei was going to die, once and for all, here and now. He dropped Toukijin and drew Tenseiga.

Before he could strike, however, something snapped around his neck from behind. It was skeletal and whip-thin, with sharp nubs of bone that dug into his neck. It squeezed him viciously hard, choking the breath from him. More tendrils burst free of the ground and began to wrap around him, forcing him immobile. Black tinged the edges of his vision, and slowly his consciousness gave way even as the bony tendrils jerked him into one of the massive holes in the ground made by Tsetsukosei's appearance.

"SESSHOUMARU!" Inuyasha abruptly tore away from his rather futile hacking at Tsetsukosei. His panicked cry was more than enough to draw Toga's attention. The inu leapt free of the dragon, eyes casting about frantically. Tsetsukosei's laugh was grating and insidious.

"At last...enjoy the last of the south's fodder, I have no further use for them."

"WHERE IS MY SESSHOUMARU?!" Toga whirled with a roar that proved Tsetsukosei was not the only one that could shake the ground. He crashed into the laughing dracolich even as the dragon's body began to crumble, turning to dirt and ash even as the inu tore at it. As Tsetsukosei faded, so too did what was left of Jormandar's army. So, too, did the enchantment fade on the remaining southern warriors and almost all of them collapsed under the weight of exhaustion and overexertion.

Everything was horribly, horribly silent until Toga let loose a soul-rending howl. Sesshoumaru was gone.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It was a struggle to lift his head. Sesshoumaru's body was a rictus of pain, and he could feel the effects of dehydration and, moreover, viciously bloody beatings. He was bound in chains in a damp, black, familiar prison.

His eyes opened fully and he bit back the choking feeling of dejavu, even as he watched crimson eyes materialize across the room.

"Good afternoon, puppy..." Tsetsukosei rasped, a wicked grin on his shapeless features even as he molded them to his more usual reptilian youkai form with too many teeth.

Sesshoumaru's eyes blazed at him, a mixture of hatred and malice that would have made most creatures run for cover. "You are a fool. After what happened last time, you're stupid enough to think to try again? I will not break so easily. I am not as weak as I was then."

The dracolich eyed him in amused surprise. Sesshoumaru felt something twist in his gut. Why would the beast have such an expression?

"Last time? What in the hells are you talking about? There was no 'last time'."

Sesshoumaru paused, unsure of how to respond. He stiffened his resolve, however, and glared defiantly at the beast. "My Lord Father will give you cause to wish you had never crawled back out of your grave."

Tsetsukosei let out a burst of laughter. "Your father? How will he do that, little puppy? He's been dead for over two hundred years."

Confusion sprang up in Sesshoumaru's mind. Surely this beast must be losing whatever mind it possessed. "You just fought with him in battle, this Sesshoumaru does not understand how you could so soon forget."

"Forget? I forget nothing. Nor have I been in any battles in a very long time."

"I will escape again, and I will make you regret this."

"Again?" Tsetsukosei drew closer to Sesshoumaru, chuckling as he slowly ran his tongue over the inu's cheek. "You have not escaped, pet...although I had wondered what it was that you could have been dreaming."

// Dreaming?....Not escaped...? // Sesshoumaru's mind was suddenly spiraling out of control, careening dangerously close to the brink of true insanity.

The dracolich chuckled as he grabbed Sesshoumaru's chin, claws digging into pale flesh and drawing thin lines of blood. "You have not, could not escape me. You gave me your life for the human girl, and I've no intention of releasing you. Who would come for YOU? You have no friends, and your only family is the half-brother hanyou you so despise. What, do you think HE would save you with how you've treated him?"

// Huh?... // Sesshoumaru couldn't formulate a more intelligible thought. "But..wh...my Lord Father..."

The dragon laughed louder. "Oh, yes...I heard the way you moaned of him...and you call ME a disgusting freak. The little puppy, lusting after his long-dead father...what a deliciously twisted creature you are. Your father cared for you while he lived, I have no doubt...but do you REALLY think the oh-so-honorable Inu no Taisho would dream of fucking his puppy? HAH! You're sick..."

Sesshoumaru lifted his chained hands, fingers trembling, and placed them near his throat. His father's mark...gone. It was a hammer-blow to the taiyoukai's confused, scattering mind.

He was still there. He had never escaped. The only mark at his throat was a horrible reddened scar from a demon-beast with far, far too many teeth. Tsetsukosei's laugh rang in his ears as the dracolich smiled like a shark with eyes like bloody knives.

He had never escaped...none of it had been real. // A...a dream?...but...what...no. My Lord father...my brother...Rin... //

He was still chained in this dungeon with no hope of escape. And of course, there was none...this beast was right. His father had been dead for so long. Sesshoumaru had never realized how deeply his feelings ran for his sire. His brother...why would Inuyasha, whom he had tried to kill so many times...why would he risk his life to come for him anyways?

All of it, all of it...had been just a dream?...

Something in Sesshoumaru's mind was laughing maniacally.

"You are mine. You have been since you took my contract. There is no salvation for you, Sesshoumaru...there never has been."

Sesshoumaru's mind twisted up and a burst of laughter tore itself free of him even as tears slid from crazed golden eyes. The frayed edges of the crystalline threads of Sesshoumaru's sanity resonated at a increasingly higher, dangerous pitch.

Shatter.

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And thus, after one hundred chapters....we come full circle.


	102. Chapter 101

Pride (In the Name of Love) 101 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Come on, guys, you didn't REALLY think I'd go through ninety chapters just to say it was all a dream? How horribly cliche and cop-outish. XD Though the panicked reviews I received did bring me something of a sadistic pleasure... It seems I nearly drove some of my fine readers mad as well...I truly never did realize what a sadist I was...

Even though it really WOULD have been a delightfully unexpected twist.

I'm beginning to wonder if I'm personally stable enough to write this story...lol...

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"It is done, Jormandar."

Jormandar inclined his horned head in the barest of nods, although he couldn't hide the malevolent grin on his face. "Very good, Tsetsukosei..."

"Hn. It was more draining on me than I expected, especially manifesting a physical body strong enough to accomplish my goal of distracting the Inu no Taisho. Careful of that wretch's youngest, by the way...his sword can dissipate barriers. But no matter."

"How is it you intend to go about breaking the dog in?" Jormandar asked, idly fondling the glowing crimson orb in his fingers. It was distressing news to find that the enemy could so easily break down magical barriers...but he had alternative defenses.

"In truth, I already have broken him. In a way."

"Explain." Jormandar peered curiously at the dracolich.

"I told you I would not have to do much. Sesshoumaru, for all his resolve to live and keep on living...has become a creature burdened with emotional attachments like any other. Waking up in a carefully prepared setting...the same one I first captured him into, in fact....and suddenly being told it was all a dream..." The dracolich chuckled wickedly. "With the help of his long-standing psychosis, it was easy to convince him that all the happiness and bonding he'd had since his escape was false."

"Psychosis, eh..."

"Hn. Sesshoumaru is not now, nor has he ever been a particularly stable creature. His mind is warped. He has a long list of complexes and disorders, some mild and some more severe. He functions normally enough, but hides behind thick walls of his own creating. Thinking that he let those walls down and received exactly the sort of pain he feared...but worse...well. Despite all his reassurances of late, he convinced himself over the years that he was hated and no one liked him....that the only one that ever really cared for him outside of the human brat he took in was his father. I simply played off what he gave me to work with. I believe I have driven him quite mad."

"You are brilliant."

"Now give me what I came for."

"Of course. What now, will you do, Tsetsukosei?" Jormandar asked casually as he tossed the orb, the lich's phylactery, to him.

"Go to present them with my terms. They will assuredly not accept them and it only heightens their anguish. I want the Inu no Taisho to know precisely why I am doing this. Even were they to come to try and rescue Sesshoumaru...by the time I'm done with him, he will never believe them to be anything but figments of his imagination."

"Do not be careless, Tsetsukosei. Your plan is not without its flaws. Some things the inu has learned are beyond his ability to create without previous knowledge."

"Do not underestimate me, Jormandar."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It took a tremendous effort to finally get Toga back inside the castle. The stricken inu lord had run around, frantic, refusing to accept that Sesshoumaru had been taken. When they did finally get him inside, he slid into his throne, staring at the wall and shaking slightly. No one said a word, although Sairex and Inuyasha were both on high alert in case Toga decided to try something foolish.

Things went south when Tsetsukosei's smoky form manifested across the room. Toga was on his feet and in the air, claws leading, before any of the others could even react. However, he passed right through the apparition, and Tsetsukosei's voice grated out.

"You would do well to sit back down, dog, else your pup will die. It would be a simple matter for me to drown him or crush him, even at this distance, with nothing but a thought."

Trembling with rage, eyes more crimson than amber, Toga sat back down. His fangs were bared and his claws gouged into the arms of his throne.

The dracolich chuckled before turning his gaze to Sairex, staring at him for a long time, then settling back on Toga. "I have come to offer you a deal, Inu no Taisho."

"What do you want?" Toga growled.

"Beyond revenge? I want only what is mine. I will offer you my terms. There will be no negotiation and no second chances. You will accept my offer or I will leave. You will have one hour to decide."

"State your terms."

"I will give you back your precious puppy as he is now...alive, if not well..." Tsetsukosei paused, enjoying the way Toga's teeth ground together, the way his muscles tensed and his claws gouged deeper into the stone. "...And in return, you give me back my raven."

Toga growled. "I am unable to make such a trade and you damn well know it."

Sairex gently rested a hand on Toga's arm. "Toga."

Toga turned to stare at him. "Don't you even try."

The raven sighed. "Toga, please. I've lived a very long life, and I've zurvived Zetsukosei's tender mercies before. I can...handle it better dan I fear Zezzhoumaru can."

Sairex suddenly sucked in a startled breath as the dracolich loomed behind him.

"It will be different this time, kittosei."

Sairex's eyes narrowed into a dark glare. "Do not call me dat, you twisted beast..."

Tsetsukosei's long-taloned fingers suddenly grabbed Sairex by the throat and lifted him. "No, this time WILL be different. I will devour your prized mind and shred you to ribbons. And when finally you die, I will drag your soul back and do it over and over...or keep you as a mindless plaything...kittosei."

Sairex hissed in anger.

Tsetsukosei smirked and dropped him before looking back to Toga. "Well, dog?"

Toga growled. "Why do you do this? Why are you so damned bent on revenge against me? What in the blue bloody hell did I EVER do to you?!"

Tsetsukosei's eyes narrowed. "You took from me what was mine! HIM!" One claw pointed accusingly at Sairex.

"What? If I recall, he ended up trapped in YOUR castle!"

"But you had him before I did...you took from me what was rightfully mine, so suffer the consequences of your actions, dog!"

"You mean...to tell me... because I unwittingly fell in love as a child...it is the cause of all this?"

"Call it what you will, but you knew the raven was mine. Or at the very least...I do not know how much the whore told you...at the least, HE knew he was to be mine. So make your choice, dog. The bird or your puppy."

Toga closed his eyes, fighting desperately to keep his calm. "I already told you, I cannot make such a choice. And even if I agreed and Sairex went with you...you would not release my Sesshoumaru, would you?"

Tsetsukosei chuckled. "Mm, I might...I'm not sure how long he will last. You see...your precious puppy has lost his mind. It was a simple matter to convince him that all that has occurred since you freed him...was naught but a dream, his subconscious desires and prayers brought to life."

Toga's eyes widened, some of the crimson fading in his shock. "What?"

"Ah, yes...it took a heavy toll on him. Especially thinking that his lust and love for his precious Lord Father was nothing more than a fantasy...and that you are long dead." Tsetsukosei turned his gaze back on Sairex and smirked. "My dear raven...you know of the talent I possessed that set me apart from all my clan, yes?..."

Sairex scowled. "Emulation...zhapezhifting...but..."

All eyes widened as Tsetsukosei's form wavered and shrank, warping before their eyes into a perfect likeness of Toga. Even his voice had changed. "It will be such a simple matter to deepen his insanity....to prove to him you were nothing but dreams and hallucinations. I will return in one hour for your decision."

With a wicked laugh that sounded just...wrong...being as it was borne of Toga's voice, Tsetsukosei vanished.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Hazy gold eyes opened and glanced around the dark floor of the cell. Sesshoumaru did not move for a while, simply feeling the cool, damp stone beneath his cheek.

// Is this even real, or am I again lost in my mind? // A laugh bubbled up in his throat but he bit it down. Some dim thread of sanity tried to manifest itself, to take root in his mind.

Sesshoumaru's gaze fell on his hands, which where chained together at the wrist. There was something distant and fascinating about them, although he couldn't figure out what it was.

Sesshoumaru could not very well figure out what much of ANYTHING was. Any time he concentrated too hard, his focus blurred as his mind began to scatter, careening out of control. It all kept coming back to the fact that he had never left.

All the times he had spent, slowly coming to bond with his brother...gone. He couldn't even bring himself to feel the familiar anger or rage at him. How could a mere dream change his feelings so whole-heartedly?

// But why would he ever come here to save me? All I have ever done is try to kill him...been terrible to him....said horrible things....//

The monk...the priestess and her impossible world...the little fox demon....his Rin, all grown up....

His Lord Father. All the happiness, the love, the feeling of safety and protection and sheer simple bliss...nothing more than a fantasy. And a terribly inappropriate one at that. Having such thoughts about his father!... His father that had died hundreds of years ago.

// It is impossible for him to come back...I tried everything long ago. All that I felt...all that has been...it has been nothing more than a simple fantasy. I was alone...am alone...and I have nothing. I traded my life for the single creature in all creation that cares for me...I have nothing, am nothing...//

Slowly, Sesshoumaru dug a claw into his opposite palm and drew a deep red line, watching his blood pour out of the nasty cut. It fascinated him, drew his mind from his thoughts and allowed him to fall into the deep crimson flow. His coherent mind skittered away with a lunatic giggle as the strain of his accepted reality again intruded. He could not handle losing so much. It had all seemed so real, been so good....it had remade him. Every imagined suffering along the way was worth it to sit down at dinner with his strange adopted 'family'...to engage in meaningless, playful teasing with his brother...to curl up at night in the warm embrace of the only being he had ever trusted to keep him safe...

It was gone He had nothing, did he...nothing but himself and this beautiful crimson. Slowly Sesshoumaru raked his claws down his arm, watching the blood well up and run down his skin. He had nothing but this...this beautiful red. This was his. It belonged to him. He slowly raked his claws through the spreading pool on the dark stones, admiring the way the crimson streaked the dark stones and dripped slowly from the sharp points of his talons.

Sesshoumaru stared at the slow drips of blood coursing down his claws with a wide and peaceful smile, listening to the distant and sing-song laughter in his head until his vision grew heavy and dark and the world slipped away from him once more.


	103. Chapter 102

Pride (In the Name of Love) 102 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Thank you for the lovely reviews, and thank you for the piccy, Fluffy's Green Comb! ^^

Not much to report. Toying with the idea of another mini-Sesshy ficlet, since everyone (me included) seems to like them so much. =D

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"Get...out...." Toga finally growled, his head hanging forward and his bangs shielding his eyes. He tried to control the vicious trembling in his limbs. It had been all he could do to refrain from lashing out at Tsetsukosei until he no longer had the strength to move. Inuyasha frowned but slid from the room.

Sairex, not at all bound by pack law, ignored the command and simply folded his arms, eyes narrowing. "Toga."

"Sairex, I meant everyone. I ..."

"I know. You're confused, you're angry, you don't know vhat to do. Vell, neither do I...but you damn vell better reconsider my offer."

Toga's eyes finally snapped open and he turned them on Sairex in a somewhat angry glare. "I will do no such thing. I cannot trade you for anyone, even my son. I would then be in just as complicated a dilemma, wondering what to do for you."

Sairex frowned deeply, but his spine stiffened at Toga's next question.

"He called you kittosei...what does that mean?"

Sairex scowled deeply, not meeting Toga's gaze. "Roughly, its a term for a whore dat really loves deir job."

Toga frowned, but was surprised out of a bit of his anger when Sairex's eyes snapped back up to his own, sparking fiercely.

"It is exactly vhy I am offering to take Zezzhoumaru's place. Bring da boy home and vorry about me later. I can handle anyting da damn lich does. I did for almost a tousand years before I got avay from him."

"A thousand..." Toga sat back, eyes widening. "You were...you were stuck with that monster for that long?"

Sairex's tone was bitter, and his smirk self-deprecating. "Roughly, yes. He prized me. I am pretty and appear delicate, but I am not fragile and could take plenty of abuse. I vas raised to learn to take pain vithout flinching. All my life before I came to your lands vas a mess of physical misery. It never depressed me, because it vas all I knew. It vas how life vith my people vas. You vere beaten and broken and hurt near to death...and only da ztrongest vould zurvive. I zurvived."

The raven paused for a long moment before continuing. "Da reason I vas zo drawn to you vas because you made no zense to me. At all. You flew in da face of all I knew. You vere not raised like I vas... you did not zee tings da vay I had been zhown to zee dem...and yet you ztill had power to dwarf my own. It fascinated me. You conzidered me in a vay no one else ever had. I did not underztand da idea of zuch positive emotions. I vas...zimply resigned to my life as it vas. And after you...noting vas da zame ever again.

"At first, vhen Zetsukosei got his claws in me, I vas his personal playting. He enjoyed testing da limits of vhat I could endure, but grew frustrated because he couldn't force me to zcream or break me. Da truth of it vas dat I'd had vorse. Zo he learned to improve. He is a master at causing pain like you vould not believe vithout leaving much physical trace behind. It vouldn't do to mar his toys, after all.

"He tried mind-games vith me but he didn't have anyting much to vork vith. In part to try to punish me and in part because he vas proud of his little toy, he flaunted me in front of da other lords of da Circle. He took a zpecial delight in forcing me to do tings in public just to prove his mastery and zhow me off. He found it amusing. I cannot count da times I vas forced to kneel at his feet and pleasure him vhile he held some meeting or other. Eventually he allowed his friends to do vith me as dey vould in an effort to gain points vith dem.

"Zoon he realized he had zometing of a convenient little bargaining chip and he whored me out for all manner of favors, mostly minor. And da vorst part vas dat I could not close my eyes to it, I could not block it out...because if I vas not an active participant and at least pretend like I enjoyed myzelf...da tings he vould do to me vere not vorth da pain of zuch humiliation.

"It took me over a tousand years to be ztrong enough dat I could get avay from him. But dat is vhy he calls me kittosei, because dat is vhat I vas. I vas his whore. You do not know da tings I have done, or how damn many I...dammit, Toga, it doesn't matter. Dis is vhat he vill do to your Zezzhoumaru. He tried before, and dat is vhy Jormandar ended up with a broken face and zeeks revenge. But dis is zometing I can handle. I'm already filthy from it."

Toga did what he could to swallow the lump in his throat and mask his horror. Of course, he had known that Tsetsukosei had done terrible things to the raven, but...somehow, he had always let his mind sort of...glaze over the facts. He didn't want to consider the implications, did not want to think of it. But even still, to think of it now...and to see the scowl of disgust and self-loathing that was rapidly melting behind Sairex's casual mask....it twisted in his gut.

It only got worse a moment later when the words sank in. 'This is what he will do to your Sesshoumaru. He tried before.' Toga shut his eyes tightly and shook his head.

"Sairex...I didn't know. I...I'm sorry. If I had any idea, I would have found some way to...to..."

"It doesn't matter, Toga. It's done and over vith. Da whole point vas it doesn't matter if he does his vorst to me, its noting I haven't endured befo--ack!"

Sairex flailed as he was suddenly jerked into Toga's lap and a tight embrace. He squirmed a bit but didn't really bother trying to resist. Toga was a lot stronger than him and if he wanted a hug, well, he damn well was going to get one.

"I am so sorry, Sairex. I never should have let you go. It is something I have regretted all my life, and now moreso than ever. You didn't....no one deserves to live like that, to be treated as a ...thing....and not a living creature. And I loved you, but gave you over regardless."

Sairex frowned, feeling his emotions starting to bubble up dangerously. If this continued much longer, he wasn't sure he could keep a lid on them...and he didn't want to break down when Toga needed the support a lot more than he did. His crisis was long past. "Do not blame yourzelf, ve both know it vas as it had to be."

"Damn the politics and damn the expectations of others! If I had been thinking clearly, I would have never let you go and would have fought off anyone that dared to challenge me!"

Sairex could feel the slight quiver in the inu's arms and the thickness in his voice, and an upwards glance confirmed his suspicions. Yes, those were tears. Closing his own eyes tightly, he rested his head against Toga's chest. "Dammit, Toga, don't be a fool. You veren't anyvhere near as powerful as you are now. You couldn't have done anyting, tings vould have ended up like dey vere at da least or vorse. Don't try to blame yourzelf for any of dis."

"I didn't even try...and I will not let you suffer again. YOU are the one being foolish, Sairex...you have a mate and a child, both of whom need y ou. I...I will offer myself to the beast in trade instead."

Sairex snorted. "Toga...dere are very, very few tings in dis vorld I vould ever venture to zay you couldn't do...but dat is one of dem. You could never zubmit to him and you are too dangerous for him to risk forcing. He von't accept your offer. Bezides...even if he DID...how in da hell do you tink ve vould ever be able to fix Zezzhoumaru vithout you?"

Toga closed his eyes and hugged Sairex tighter to his chest, as much to comfort himself as to soothe the ache in his heart for ever allowing that monster to take his raven away without a fight in the first place. "So the only option I have is to decline his offer, knowing that it will send him home to torture my pup."

Sairex was silent, which was confirmation enough for Toga's unspoken question.

"Dear gods, Sairex...I'm so worried. Even...even if I had Sesshoumaru back this moment, it might already be too late. He was ill recovered from the first ordeal. He had only recently begun to build himself back up, to get over the frantic nightmares...and it has not been long that I have been able to allow him out of my sight for fear that he might...might hurt himself. And now this... and what's worse, the bastard as much as told us he intends to use my image in his schemes. I...what if...what if I can't...." Toga choked off, unable to finish the thought.

"Ve vill find him and bring him back. You vill be able to put him back together, it vill just take time. I tink...dis offer vas not zo much a genuine trade offer on Zetsukosei's part zo much at it vas a lash to use on you. He knew you vould not accept it...but I vish you vould."

"Do not hold yourself in so little regard, Sairex. As you say, it is not likely a real offer. He would betray the terms and you would both be stuck...and furthermore...he knows how we have come and gone to the circle previously. Should you be his captive...he will no doubt find a way to keep you from assisting us in opening a portal, and we have no one else that can. Your freedom is vital."

Sairex looked up and sighed softly before brushing the pads of his thumbs lightly over Toga's cheeks, wiping away the inu's helpless tears. "I am zo zorry to ever have caused you dis mess...it all comes back to me. Vithout me, you never vould have run afoul of Zetsukosei all dose years ago."

Toga growled softly. "Never, ever say such a thing to me again. I would not trade that time for anything, do not demean it or yourself. We will find a way to rescue my son, and we will bring him back, and I will do it without sacrificing you."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei blinked at the sight of Sesshoumaru. So much blood...but nothing vital had been cut. The wounds were already sealing.

It baffled the dracolich briefly. // Why would the puppy cut himself to no purpose? Just to watch himself bleed? // Tsetsukosei snorted and hoisted Sesshoumaru off the ground, giving him a rough examination. He seemed to be in one piece and in no serious danger of dying.

Good. It wouldn't do to lose his prize that he had fought for for so long. And the look on the inu Lord's face...oh, his agony had been so sweet. And the hatred in that pretty raven's eyes....delectable.

The dracolich chuckled to himself as he casually tossed Sesshoumaru's unconscious body into the corner of the room and stalked back out. Yes, this was going to be most enjoyable. All he had to do now was to bounce between shapes and deepen the inu's insanity.

That had been the real reason he had made his way back to Toga's castle, more than the sweet vengeance his false offer would bring. He needed to get a good look at Toga and Inuyasha, make certain he could emulate their forms and scents and voices without fail. Should Sesshoumaru realize one of his 'hallucinations' was not only real, but an imposter...much of his work would be undone.

And for all the work he had already done on the inu, well... Sesshoumaru had an extraordinary strength within him. For all his psychosis and long-standing mental issues that made it possible for Tsetsukosei to even wiggle his way through the cracks to chip at Sesshoumaru's mind in the first place... Sesshoumaru was proud and strong. His solid if cold sense of logic made things much more difficult as well. It was always possible that Sesshoumaru could find some center within himself and render himself immune to Tsetsukosei's mind-games.

Should that happen, well...he would probably have to kill him or strip his mind from him. Neither were positive options. It'd be a sad loss to kill him...and Sesshoumaru as a mindless, lifeless puppet held little appeal for Tsetsukosei. The dracolich thrived on pain, fear, agony, despair...the mindless felt none of those. Even the creatures he managed to break still had those terrible emotions in their eyes. True, once they were broken he would grow bored...but not before delighting in his success for a while.

// I just have to make sure the damned raven stays as far away from him as Jormandar. I can pass them off as delusions provided he does not see them, just figments of his imagination. But they are the weakest links in my plan. If they proved real, then he will realize it was NOT all a dream. Until I have further deepened this insanity I am crafting...I should keep him isolated. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A pair of crimson eyes gleamed thoughtfully as Naraku slid through the shadows, rolling over what he'd learned in his mind.

He wasn't really up on who the participants in the current fiasco were, but one thing had caught his attention and he wanted to try it. It could be terribly beneficial, besides...

Shapeshifting sounded like fun!


	104. Chapter 103

Pride (In the Name of Love) 103 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Just to clarify a point in regards to Sesshoumaru. The biggest thing I've seen that people are pointing out to snap him out of his crazy is the fact his claws were yanked out - however, the timeframe Sesshoumaru believes himself to be in is previous to the point where Tsetsukosei removed them.

Also, I giggled a good deal to hear Naraku being called an 'amoral lazyass tease'. Yeah, pretty much nailed it. XD Originally, I was going to have him recover...now I'm not so sure. He's a lot of fun like this....

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After the allotted hour had passed, Tsetsukosei returned. Toga squared his shoulders and faced the dracolich with all the frigidity he could muster, flatly denying his terms. The dracolich smirked - it was not really a surprise, and turned to leave.

Tsetsukosei returned home and his portal shut behind him. With a gleeful smile, he settled in to have a good meal and plot out his time with Sesshoumaru.

When Tsetsukosei left, Sairex spent his time doing what he could to make sure Toga was alright, then went to find Miroku. He needed to teach the monk how to open portals. Toga had brought up a very valid point - if anything happened to him, they HAD to be able to get back and forth to the Circle, at least until they had regained Sesshoumaru.

Naraku, too, spent his time productively. He had concocted a scheme that was just crazy enough to work. He simply had to learn what it was he was capable of..and how to control it.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Three years passed.

During that time, Sairex had made numerous forays into the Circle, seeking out every contact he had and using all his resources in an effort to learn anything at all of Tsetsukosei or Sesshoumaru's whereabouts. No one had heard anything, however. Even the raven's best attempts at scrying had produced nothing. It was as if they had dropped off the face of the world.

No one noticed when, on one occasion when Sairex slid through the portal to the Circle, he did not travel there alone.

Toga grew quiet and distant, and rarely shared meals with the rest of them anymore. He did his job with careless efficiency, but his heart wasn't in it. He was gripped by a terrible sadness, and it deepened with each day that passed. Every hour that passed lessened the likelihood that he would ever see his beloved Sesshoumaru again in this life...and with the dracolich's control on the afterlife, he probably never would in any other life either.

Sairex did what he could to try and give him hope, but he knew how hollow his words had to sound. As months melted into years, Toga settled into a numb sort of acceptance. He never fully gave up hope, as was evidenced by the tiny flicker of desperate pleading in his eyes every time Sairex came to report. But the reports were always the same. Nothing.

Toga practically became a ghost in his own castle. He went to bed early, was locked in his study before anyone else was up.

Life DID have to go on, and it did in some ways. Toga held the official mating ceremony for Kouga and Inuyasha after a year and a half, and the news was relatively well-received by the wolf's elders.

The rest of Rin's child-like appearance had mostly melted by the time she turned sixteen and she had grown into a stunningly beautiful woman. She never noticed any of the growing number of suitors that had been following her, however. Toga took her protection as a personal matter in Sesshoumaru's absence and it soon became evident that to think about laying a finger on Rin was asking for death.

Rin was at least as heartbroken as Toga, although part of it was BECAUSE of Toga. She could feel his despair, see the hollow ache in his eyes. No one had told her precisely what had happened to Sesshoumaru, but she could see it's awful immensity in his sire's pain.

One of the other few bright points in the castle was Sairex and Miroku's daughter Aliana. She was an absolutely adorable child, smart and mischievous with rapidly growing black hair and huge, sparkling yellow eyes. Kagome had done her share of babysitting while Sairex worked to train Miroku, and soon had her calling Miroku 'Daddy' and Sairex 'Father'...although the priestess had snickered that she should have taught the little raven to call Sairex 'Mommy' instead. Miroku had thought it a grand idea, but Sairex had had issues with it.

Aliana adored both her parents and all her various 'aunts and uncles', but she especially loved Miroku and had announced to all and sundry that she was going to be a monk when she got older. Sairex had tried to gently break it to her that demons couldn't be monks, but Miroku had just laughed and laughed and told his lover to let the girl have her fun.

Life moved on, however stilted and pained it may have been for some of its participants.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Tsetsukosei had not been idle in his efforts against Sesshoumaru. During the years he had made an art of the taiyoukai's pain...although as the days and weeks turned into months, he lost the ability to cause Sesshoumaru any real anguish. His lunacy had grown too far.

Sesshoumaru's insanity had slowly deepened and all traces of reality fell away. His perceived loss had been too great, and despair had overtaken him. Tsetsukosei had come to him in an elaborate series of ruses, in the forms of all those he had loved. He would give Sesshoumaru false hope...even went so far on some occasions as to help him escape...but every time, things twisted. The inu found himself beaten, broken, emotionally taunted, raped, and assaulted from all angles by the mutated forms of all he loved...always to end with them wisping away and him left in his cell. Each time had shattered his damaged psyche further.

Once the machine was fully put into motion, it proved to be self-propelled. Dark voices whispered and giggled in the corners of Sesshoumaru's mind, and he truly did begin to hallucinate. Tsetsukosei was, in some ways, proud of his work...but as the madness fully took hold, he found his ability to even register on Sesshoumaru's radar to be slim. The inu was largely removed from anything he could do, and would sit and giggle during the worst beating the dracolich could muster, or idly chat with things that were not there.

The dracolich would never admit it, but the look in those never-blinking, bloodshot gold eyes sent a chill through him now. His carefully laid plans were slowly shelved, and he made sure to keep shackles on the inu's wrists and ankles at all time. It was not that he feared an escape attempt any more...he was worried about what Sesshoumaru was capable of, now that he had no restraints, no morals, no codes or guidelines at all. His power was entirely unfettered. While this meant he lacked the precision and control that made him so technically deadly...it also meant he was wholly unpredictable and for no apparent reason could let loose without any restraint or thought of self preservation.

He HAD thought to keep Sesshoumaru as his own plaything and perhaps trade the use of him for favors. It did not take long before being taken to Sesshoumaru was a threat instead of a promise of enjoyment. The first lord to try had met a terrible end. He had been confident as he strode into the dark chamber, eyeing the shackled inu sitting against the wall, head down and arms hanging between his knees.

Slowly the head had lifted and the wild, tangled silver bangs had parted enough to reveal those terrible bloodshot eyes and a maniacal, fanged grin. Sesshoumaru had jerked slowly to his feet as if pulled up by invisible strings. He had torn apart the shrieking demon with his teeth and claws, laughing as he was showered in blood. Tsetsukosei had almost been afraid to take the corpse away afterwards - Sesshoumaru had set it in the opposite corner and begun something of a conversation with it.

It only took a couple more brutal deaths before no one wanted to come anywhere near the dracolich's crazed pet.

Eventually the whispers of the dracolich's crazed pet reached a certain set of ears that had searched for any such rumor for months. Sairex was too far removed from the lowest parts of the Circle's underbelly to hear things as well as he had used to - he had a while before the crafty raven would hear and act.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku eyed the carefully concealed fortress with a cross between relief and irritation.

// It's about damned time... I am SO sick of this place. //

Naraku had come up with a brilliant plan, but it hadn't quite panned out as he had expected it would. After mastering his ability to change his shape at will, he had slid into one of Sairex's portals behind the raven. His plan was devious but simple.

He would get to Sesshoumaru first and ransom him for the rule of the West. This way he could get his own castle without having to fight for it, really. It had sounded like such a good idea at the time.

A year and a half of wandering had produced absolutely no leads, and the kumo found himself continually under attack by threats unlike anything he had experienced before. He was able to avoid or destroy them, but his life was dreary and unpleasant.

The memories he had lost failed to resurface, especially with as much time as had passed in unfamiliar settings. In truth, he had grown used to his new life and no longer felt the drive to recover what had been lost. He knew it was still there, locked somewhere in his subconscious...but he had accepted the idea that he may never recover them.

Sairex knew immediately what had happened when he heard of Naraku and his symptoms, just as he knew what was necessary to fix the damage. Of course, no one wanted him to except the kumo himself - a Naraku that forevermore did not realize his dark nature was to the group's liking. Then the kumo had vanished without a trace, and it didn't matter anymore.

Finally, Naraku had located Tsetsukosei's hideout. Gone were his thoughts of the grandeur and delight he would feel as the new Western Lord...all he wanted was to get Sesshoumaru out of there and run around waving flags until the raven found them so he could get out of this blasted place. It was forever dark, it was dreary, and there wasn't a good cup of tea to be found anywhere.

Slipping from shadow to shadow, Naraku made his way into the heavily concealed fortress. There were only a few guards posted, and almost all were magical automatons such as golems and some mindless undead. Tsetsukosei did not trust living guards to not reveal his whereabouts.

The kumo's ability to mold his body to his will allowed him to easily slither through the cracks in Tsetsukosei's defenses in the way almost no other could. He had timed his assault to one of the rare occasions the dracolich actually left, so he wasn't worried about the confrontation.

Since his reawakening, Naraku had never actually seen Sesshoumaru...but even still, the taiyoukai was unmistakable. Naraku shuddered as he examined the room he had finally located the inu in.

The stone walls were covered in deep claw-marks. Bones were scattered in various places, although there was one small pile arranged carefully in one corner, all of them painted almost wholly with long-dried blood.

Sesshoumaru was sitting in another dark corner, his knees bent up and his forearms resting on them. His long hair was a ragged mess of tarnished silver tangles - it hadn't seen a brush in years, the kumo was willing to bet. Sesshoumaru's clothing was little more than frayed tatters of cloth. He was underweight and his skin was a spiderweb of cuts and scars. Naraku swallowed thickly when Sesshoumaru's head fell slowly to one side and one eye locked on him. The tiniest glint of a toothy smirk shone in the dark. Still...despite the dark and terrible thing this creature had become, it had to be Toga's son.

"Well, hello, Sesshoumaru. I..." Naraku swallowed, unnerved by the lunatic stare. "I have come to get you out of here, to get you home."

Sesshoumaru didn't move or respond, so Naraku cautiously unlocked the door and walked in. Still, the inu made no motion. "You don't look like you're in too good of shape, but I suppose they'll want you back in any case. And without you, I can't get back, so...you'll have to come with me. I'll take you out of here."

There was a gentle clink of chains as Sesshoumaru slowly jerked himself to his feet, still staring at Naraku without blinking. He made no move to approach the door or the kumo.

"You do want to go outside, right? Back home? You know...get some fresh air, sleep in a real bed, see the stars and the moon at night?"

Finally Sesshoumaru spoke, his voice a lilted crack, slightly raspy from long disuse. "The moon is a bitch...we have seen her bleed, and it makes us laugh. Her other children are screaming..." The inu trailed off slowly, muttering before chuckling softly.

Naraku blinked before smiling feebly. "Yes, of course. Can you...er...do you understand me?"

Slowly Sesshoumaru nodded once, his wide grin only growing. "We can understand."

"Good. Will you come with me? I promise, the reward is worth it."

Sesshoumaru walked over slowly and squinted at Naraku. The kumo gasped and tried to jerk backwards as his face was suddenly snared in a clawed grasp, his cheek laid open as Sesshoumaru's talons were torn down its length. Naraku stumbled back a few steps, only to collide with something...Sesshoumaru. The inu had somehow gotten behind him, and he hadn't seen him move.

Sesshoumaru slowly leaned forward and ran his tongue over the deep cut with a soft laugh. Naraku knew, somehow, that fear was something he wasn't used to...he could feel it in how deeply wrong it felt. But this was wholly unnerving. This creature with him was very sick and very, very dangerous. // Maybe I would have been better off trying to find a different way back... //

Naraku slowly extricated himself from the taiyoukai's embrace and made his way out the door. Sesshoumaru shambled after him, muttering quietly to himself and occasionally growling or giggling softly. When they neared the door, he turned to face Sesshoumaru. "There are guards ahead...after that, we'll have to travel swiftly and far to make sure the dragon does not catch wind of us."

"The wind will hold her peace, she is too afraid of what we will do. She has slithered and spoken threats in our ears but now we are free..." Sesshoumaru whispered with a private smile. Before Naraku could respond, the taiyoukai bounded towards the door with complete disregard for the guards, leaving the kumo helpless to do anything except try and keep up.

Between the two of them - although Naraku was incredibly hard-pressed to keep up with the inu - the guards were all destroyed. Once the last golem fell, Sesshoumaru's blur of motion halted abruptly and the inu stumbled and shuffled his way off in a random direction. Naraku stared before closing his eyes and taking a deep breath to try and strengthen his resolve. // Maybe I should have stayed a farmer after all... //


	105. Chapter 104

Pride (In the Name of Love) 104 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So, I figured it out. As of yesterday, I had 103 chapters written in 108 days. Meaning I'm five short to being wholly on track. I suppose that's acceptable, especially if you consider I have....six sidestories! That means I'm one up. Two up if you consider the prologue (chapter 0.) Hah. Go me. And if you consider that each chapter takes me...eh, roughly...two hours (I am easily distracted by emails or the thought to research something or other so I don't type it and make a TOTAL fool of myself....)...220 hours so far...that means I've put about nine days straight into writing this thing. XD

I've begun editing for spelling errors, typos, misplaced / mistyped words...and everything of the sort that I can find. Content changes will be exceedingly minor and will not make any rereading a necessity. Any further errors found once my self-beta catches up wholly with my current progress, please report them to me so I can fix them.

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Naraku was perched on a rock near their small campfire, keeping a wary eye on his traveling companion. Sesshoumaru was seated and leaning against another rock, his head cocked to one side as he stared into the fire in a crooked, one-eyed way, never blinking or moving.

The kumo sighed inwardly. It had been a harrowing trip so far. Sesshoumaru would alternate between shuffling along at random to being distracted and stopping dead, or suddenly bouncing ahead at a speed the kumo couldn't match. Luckily, he didn't travel in anything resembling a straight line, so Naraku was able to more or less keep up...although he had almost been wiped out by a wholly random - as far as he knew - blast of green light that Sesshoumaru had saw fit to level at a rock. His nerves were frayed.

// Travel with him like this much more and I'll be as batty as he is. // He sipped at the substance in his cup, scowling. Tea, indeed...he wasn't sure he really wanted to know what this concoction ACTUALLY was...but it was better than the plain and rather fetid water he'd located.

Sesshoumaru's gaze suddenly snapped up to him, beaming in mad delight. "Purple!"

Naraku lifted an eyebrow, and the inu's gaze slowly fell back to its previous position, staring at the dancing flames that didn't seem to give off much light at all. "Of course."

"She's howling. She can't see us, but we can see her." Sesshoumaru jabbed a finger roughly skyward and snickered. "It makes her angry, doesn't it, mother? Oh, yes, we know how you hate us...and fear us. We are out of your reach, and by the time you see us, it will be too late, too late...your children are screaming, and we will make them all pay. Oh yes...you twisted whore..."

Naraku just nodded in agreement and continued drinking his 'tea'. // It's always mother issues, isn't it... // Sesshoumaru's one-sided conversation had trailed off into muttering that the kumo couldn't quite pick up on until the inu slowly fell asleep.

Naraku stretched out, figuring it was as good a time as any to get a little rest himself. He barely bit back a yelp as Sesshoumaru's gaze snapped skyward and he let out a deranged scream. "You bitch!" Before Naraku could begin to calm his jangling nerves or react past his original jump, Sesshoumaru was apparently asleep again. // I hate my life. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex sighed heavily as he began the all-too- familiar ritual of opening the portal to the circle. He informed Miroku that he was off to make his daily rounds again.

Once through the portal, he melted into his bird form. He was fastest this way. He shot skyward and headed for his own hidden castle.

Once there, he hunted down Eskrai. The raven almost bowled him over in her eagerness to greet him.

"My Lord Sairex!"

"Yes, its me."

"We have found something!"

"What?!" Sairex's yellow eyes grew wider.

"Tatakal found a pair of creatures traveling across the blasted lands, near the Anfurinari. One was generally unremarkable...it could be the lich. The other was a mess but had the features you sent the murder looking for...silver hair, pale skin, a crescent moon and crimson slashes on the face."

Sairex couldn't believe what he was hearing. Sesshoumaru, alive? It made no sense that he would be traveling abroad, but...the raven wasn't about to question it. "Thanks, Es. I have to hurry."

Eskrai nodded and waved her wings at him in a shooing gesture. "Go, go..."

Sairex hopped to the window and then shot out of it, heading at top speed in the direction he had been pointed.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The journey was a bit long, but it was not unrewarding. Sairex's sharp eyes picked up the distant flicker of a dying fire in the midst of the barren landscape, and he slowly circled closer for a better look. He wanted to let out a triumphant crow of glee, but refrained, when he noticed Sesshoumaru. The inu was alive and apparently in good enough condition to travel.

Sairex's eyes turned to regard the inu's companion, blinking in surprise. It wasn't Tsetsukosei, it was....Naraku?

// Well, suppose this explains where the kumo got off to when he disappeared all that time ago. Who knew he'd be going after Sesshoumaru, though? Will wonders never cease... // The raven circled a few more times before landing, allowing his body to flow back into its humanoid shape. Sesshoumaru didn't so much as twitch, but Naraku's eyes snapped open. The kumo couldn't hide his relief.

"Vell, I must admit, I didn't expect to zee YOU here." Sairex muttered. In the time Naraku had spent at the Western castle as their 'prisoner', most of Sairex's hatred had turned to a neutral sort of dislike. After all...the kumo didn't remember the true darkness in his soul...COULDN'T remember without being able to bridge his mental gap...and he hadn't done anything terribly wicked in the interim since the villages. In fact, he was almost amusing...especially around Inuyasha. He took great delight in being friendly and cheerful around the hanyou, who was invariably mortified.

"I want you to know it has been my intention to bring Sesshoumaru back and ransom him for the Western Lands."

"Really..."

"Yes. However...I have since decided it would be entirely too much work to try and rule a whole kingdom like that and I don't really need a castle, although I would like a few personal attendants. Mostly, though, I just want to get the hell out of here."

Sairex nodded slowly. Even if he didn't care for the kumo personally...he knew Toga would want to thank him no matter his motivations. Who knew if they could have found him WITHOUT Naraku's 'help'? "Very vell. I vill open da portal home. Vake him an-"

"It's really probably better if you let him sleep, if at all possible." Naraku said wearily. Sairex took in the kumo's haggard look and slowly arched an eyebrow, waiting for an explanation. "He's quite mad. Besides, its not easy to wake him up when he's solidly out. I've tried."

Sairex frowned and looked at Sesshoumaru. // Mad, are you?... Well, time heals all wounds, at least enough to get by. I'm sure we'll find a way. // "Alright. Point noted. Let me get us home...vait. Vhere is his zvord and dat furry ting he vears?"

"He had no such things with him when I got there, so I have no idea what you're talking about."

Sairex sighed. // I suppose I'll do a return rescue mission for them later. // "Alright. I vill contact Miroku."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku bit back an urge to laugh as he put the finishing touches on the latest talisman he had written. Sitting next to him was his daughter, concentrating hard on copying him. She had a big box of colored sticks Kagome had given her - crayons, the monk recalled - and was drawing her own set of symbols on a sheet of paper. She was very serious about it, and was dressed in her 'monk robes'...which consisted of a sheet she'd torn from her bed and wrapped around herself. Miroku still thought the idea of his little demon wanting to be a monk to be terribly amusing and flattering all at the same time.

Miroku gasped when Sairex's mental voice popped into his head. // Miroku! Quick, make vith da portal, I've got him! //

It took a bit of work, but soon Naraku, Sairex, and a soundly sleeping Sesshoumaru were back through the portal.

"Dear Buddha, it really is him..." Miroku stared at Sesshoumaru in surprise. He had given up hope of them ever finding the lost inu. The monk very studiously did not look at Naraku. No matter if the kumo was the same person as before or not...he wanted NOTHING to do with him. He could not forgive him for his past, which really wasn't much of a surprise.

Naraku, feeling his good deed had been done for the next, oh...two or three millenia, trudged off to take a bath and find himself a decent meal.

Sairex grinned hugely. "Can you vatch him for a minute? I have to go get Toga."

"Yes, of course. Hurry."

The raven didn't need to be told twice and he tore out the doorway.

Aliana peered at Sesshoumaru curiously, then slowly edged her way over. "Who is he?"

Miroku smiled. "That is your Uncle Sesshoumaru, Ali. He's been gone a very long time."

Aliana stared at Sesshoumaru before giving Miroku a grave look. "He was bad. He skipped bathtime, I can tell. Father and you never let me skip bathtime."

Miroku chuckled and nodded. "Yes...but I'm sure his father will make certain he doesn't miss his next one."

"Who is that?"

"Your Uncle Toga."

"He is always very sad and quiet..."

"Well, I trust that he'll be a lot better now, very soon. He was sad because Sesshoumaru was lost. But now he isn't lost anymore."

"Oh. Well, thats good." The girl nodded, trying to mimic Miroku's calm and quiet wisdom, before turning back to the task of drawing her talisman. She thought hers looked MUCH better than her Daddy's, although she wouldn't tell him that....they were much more colorful. Oh, well. This was why she was going to be the best monk EVER.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex didn't even bother to knock, just shot into the study so fast he almost collided with Toga's desk. The inu Lord was sitting with his hands folded, staring at nothing in particular. Slowly he flicked his gaze to the raven.

"Whatever i--"

"Toga, ve found him!"

"WHAT?!" Toga was on his feet before Sairex could even finish the sentence. "Where is he!?"

"My room."

Toga was out the door before the raven could even blink.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga's heart almost stopped when he took in the sight of Sesshoumaru. His pup was battered and a mess, but ALIVE and HERE. // My Sesshoumaru...oh, my dear Sesshoumaru... // Toga didn't bother to speak as he kneeled and scooped up his sleeping pup, tears of the sheerest relief and unfettered, disbelieving joy sliding unchecked down his cheeks.

Sairex finally caught up. His own heart skipped a beat, doing a little flip of happiness. It was as if someone had flipped a switch in his beloved inu friend, turning the life in him back on. He knew he had to exhibit a bit of caution, though. "Toga...it vas Naraku dat actually found him. Naraku zays he's ... vell. Gone mad. It may take a long time to undo vhat da lich has done to him."

Toga nodded and headed for the door. "I expected damage...but the simple fact that he is here and alive means the healing can begin. Mm. So that's where the kumo went...I shall speak with him later. I have other matters to attend."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga sighed as he stared at the tangle of Sesshoumaru's hair. // No idea how I'll work THAT out...might have to just cut it off. It's not like it won't grow back within a couple of days. // He barely refrained from jumping as Sesshoumaru's eyes suddenly snapped open with almost audible force.

"Sesshoumaru...?" he whispered. Those wide, bloodshot golden eyes were incredibly disconcerting. Sesshoumaru appeared to be both seeing but not comprehending his surroundings as he slowly sat up. It caught the younger inu's attention that he was unchained, and he stared at his wrists for a moment before ever so slowly turning his gaze to Toga, who was standing next to the bed. "My Sesshoumaru...dear gods, you cannot know how happy I am to have you back...I thought..." Toga swallowed, unable to continue past the lump of emotion in his throat.

Toga watched as Sesshoumaru stood up without responding to his words. The younger taiyoukai appeared to consider him for a long moment before moving.

Toga never saw it coming, could never have expected it. Before his emotionally overwhelmed mind could figure out what was going on, Sesshoumaru's hand had snaked out and snatched up Sounga...and then buried the blade in his belly.

Sounga hadn't even made an effort to possess Sesshoumaru...there was no mind there for the devilish sword to get a hold on.

Toga choked in surprise as the sword tore into him, pain and shock evident in his eyes. He slowly slid to his knees, quivering fingers reaching up to grasp Sounga's hilt, his vision rapidly starting to fade to black. He was losing blood...a lot of blood, and way too quickly. Sesshoumaru cocked his head slowly, as if weighing him in some way, then strode over towards the window. His pup's voice was cracked and twisted.

"We do not appreciate your tricks, mother...oh, how you think you can hide behind this yellow ball of fire...but it will pass, and then we will find you, and you will know our wrath. When the dark comes, you cannot hide...you cannot trick us with more false playthings and more ghosts..."

Sesshoumaru didn't even spare Toga a glance as he made his way out of the room, muttering dark words of vengeance to himself.


	106. Chapter 105

Pride (In the Name of Love) 105 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Well, got 30 chapters edited last night, and I hope to get several more done before I go to bed tonight. Then I get to go thru the tedious process of reposting them all on my sites.

Time for me to put on some good crazy-music and see what I can do about THIS chapter....

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Toga groaned, forcing himself to focus. He knew, dimly, that the fact that he couldn't feel the pain was bad. His body was going into shock. It was all he could do to keep from losing consciousness. It occurred to him that he couldn't recall when his face had hit the floor.

With a supreme effort of will he gripped Sounga and pulled the blade from his stomach. The pain was instant and immense. The inu clung to it. If he DID go into shock or pass out, there was a very real chance he could die.

A sardonic smile twitched his lips even as he coughed up a gout of blood. // I spend every day of the last three years worrying over my Sesshoumaru's life only to have him return and end my own within minutes...? How's that for irony... Damn it. I refuse to die from this...I've been run through before...but I think he hit some of my vitals. Figures. Even insane, Sesshoumaru wouldn't MISS. But I never thought he'd strike at ME... //

Before he could give in to the dark fireworks threatening to overwhelm his vision, Toga hauled himself to his feet, falling forward and catching himself on the wall. He knew distantly that if he fell now, he wouldn't be able to get back up. He clamped one hand tightly over the wound in a rather feeble effort both to try and staunch the blood flow somewhat as well as to make sure nothing that was supposed to be classified as his insides succeeded in becoming his outsides.

// Just have to make it one step at a time...oh, Sesshoumaru, please don't get yourself hurt. I will...find a way to help you. I will... //

To his credit, Toga managed to stagger a fair distance down the hallway before a numb sense of unreality took hold of him. It occurred to him that the floor suddenly seemed a lot closer than it had a moment before...but he never felt the impact of hitting the cool marble. He simply kept falling forever...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

She was looking for him. He could see the slitted, yellow-white glow of her pale eye peering out from the black shroud of night. Stupid whore. He heard the piercing wails that no one else could hear rebounding from the stars as they shrank from his baleful golden glare.

Sesshoumaru grinned fiercely as he stared at the moon. // You send more of your stupid illusions against us? Do you have no new tricks, mother? How many times do we have to destroy them before you give up? // His grin of defiance grew as he gouged his claws deeply into his forehead, not feeling the pain as he tore skin and flesh, ripping the crescent moon from his forehead.

// We refuse to wear your brand, mother...will you strike us down for it? You cannot. All you can do is hide, and watch us, and shriek. We will give you reason to cry out so...we are no longer chained. //

Sesshoumaru continued down the hallway smugly, hearing a chorus of hateful screams in his mind but paying them little heed. He was FREE...or was it another trick? It did not matter. Idly he wiped the blood away that was running into his eyes, licking thoughtfully at it. A dark scowl erupted as he stared at the crimson staining his fingers.

She had made him bleed. It was not HER blood, it was THEIRS, and she had tricked them into spilling it, just to get rid of her mark...!

"Damn you!" Sesshoumaru shrieked in rage, whirling and firing a tremendous blast of energy out the window in the direction of the moon. It vanished from sight without striking the half-lidded orb hanging in the sky, despite how teasingly close that baleful eye was...

She had tricked them, AGAIN, and she had won...she escaped him. He could hear her laughter in the way the wind rustled the trees, the distant ripple of water from the fountains in the garden...

Sesshoumaru growled viciously and slid around a corner, out of sight from the mocking moonlight streaming in the windows, leaning against the wall and shaking in anger. How DARE she...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha stopped in his tracks as he rounded the corner, his eyes flying wide at the sight before him. Sesshoumaru was pressed tightly against the wall, hands spread out and claws digging into the smooth surface. His body was shaking and a twisted, breathless growl rattled in his throat. Blood was pouring down his face from the center of his forehead and his hair flew in tangles. Wide yellow eyes were staring at nothing in particular.

Inuyasha had never been so afraid in regards to Sesshoumaru in all his life. He was not only afraid OF the absolutely mad inu - in an equal measure, he was afraid FOR him.

The hanyou paused with a frown. He couldn't fathom why Sesshoumaru would be up and wandering the halls. He had assumed that he wouldn't see his brother until the next day at LEAST, and that their father would be taking care of him tonight. Surely Toga wouldn't have let Sesshoumaru walk off like THIS...something had to be wrong.

Hesitantly, Inuyasha took a couple steps closer to his brother, swallowing thickly. His ears flattened back against his skull. "Sessh...?"

Sesshoumaru's breathing and quivering stopped. For a moment, he didn't so much as twitch....then slowly, slowly his head turned and his eyes bored into Inuyasha.

"You dare mock us with your pathetic tricks? DAMN you..."

Inuyasha blinked and took a step backwards. "Tricks?...I...I'm not...what?"

Sesshoumaru pointed at Inuyasha abruptly, throwing his head back with a triumphant crow of glee. "You aren't real! You cannot fool us anymore! Weep and cower, wraith, and perhaps we will spare you!"

The hanyou frowned, uncertain of what to do. "Sessh...it...it's me. I'm not...there's no tricks here. You're home now. You're safe, and everything is going to be alright. Father and I will take care of you."

Inuyasha yelped as a wild lash of green light scythed through the air and collided painfully with his side. He hit the wall hard, gawking at his brother. Sesshoumaru's whip was pulsing erratically and eventually flickered out. The look on his face was one of victory.

"We are not dead yet...we have things to do. We cannot see our Lord Father yet....we are not worthy. We are bad...bad...we lusted and were sinful. We must seek penance, we are no better than her. We are unclean! Do not look at us....don't...why are you...STOP STARING AT US! WE WILL TEAR OUT YOUR EYES!"

Inuyasha barely got out of the way of Sesshoumaru's lunge, jerking his head back as bloody talons sliced the air roughly where his face had been a moment ago. He was off balance, though, and had no hope of getting away from a second strike.

But there was no second strike. Sesshoumaru landed in a crouch and slowly hunched over, bowing his head as he dug his claws deeply into his arms, eyes wide and staring as tears mingled with the blood running down his face. He was mumbling softly to himself. "Sick...don't look at us....don't look....forgive us...we will...our heart?...but you promised...all my life to sacrifice, but you promised...." Inuyasha's eyes widened and he barely managed to stop Sesshoumaru's arm from driving into his own chest in an effort to cut out his own heart.

"Fuck...Sesshoumaru, please...I don't...what the fuck can I do?!"

Sesshoumaru howled and yanked free of him, covering his ears and throwing himself backwards, cracking his spine hard against the opposite wall. "Nooo, he PROMISED! Damn you! GET OFF ME! DON'T TOUCH ME!" Before Inuyasha could do anything, Sesshoumaru threw himself back against the wall again with another bone-rattling crack...and again...and again...and he wouldn't stop making the most terrible wail.

All the commotion had finally drawn some attention. Miroku and Sairex showed up and skidded to a stop. Inuyasha gave them a somewhat frantic look, tears streaking down his face. "I don't know what to do! HELP him!"

Miroku weighed the options hurriedly. They had to stop the crazed inu before he caused himself some serious damage, but...none of them were strong enough to restrain him if Inuyasha couldn't.

"Vhere da hell is Toga?" Sairex grated.

Sesshoumaru stopped moving as if someone had flicked a switch, holding in an almost impossible position without losing his balance or twitching. Ever so slowly he lowered his hands and stood. No one else so much as dared to breathe.

Sesshoumaru's eyes fixated on Sairex. The taiyoukai didn't move, didn't even seem to breathe...he simply stared for the longest time before speaking, his voice trembling. "Y-y-you..."

Sairex blinked slowly. "Yes, Lord Zezzhoumaru?..."

"Y-you...w-we...you can't!"

Sairex exchanged a brief, uneasy glance with Miroku and Inuyasha. "Can't...vhat?"

"Be. We...I...but....it was...no..." Sesshoumaru moaned, shaking his head. For the tiniest moment, the small group saw the tiniest flicker of severely strained sanity in the taiyoukai's eyes before he promptly collapsed in a dead faint.

Miroku sighed. "There you go again, Sairex, making all the guys swoon. Can't take you anywhere. What was that about?"

The raven snorted. "Believe me, I have no idea vhat's going on in dat head of his." Sairex frowned as he slowly approached Sesshoumaru. "Vhat da hell is he doing out here by himself?"

Inuyasha shook his head, choking back the anguish that was still trying to consume him at the sight of his brother being so broken. "I don't know, I was wondering the same thing myself. I can't imagine the old man letting Sesshoumaru out of his sight any time in the next six centuries."

Sairex frowned, a strong sense of dread blooming within him. "Can you two take care of him? I'm going to go make zure everyting is alright vith Toga."

Inuyasha's eyes widened. He had never in his wildest imaginings thought to consider that something could have happened to his father. "You don't really think..."

Sairex shrugged before tearing off down the hall.

They didn't really know what to do with him, so Miroku and Inuyasha managed to get Sesshoumaru into a nearby bedroom. Miroku placed several ofuda on the walls and door, hoping the barrier would keep the taiyoukai contained until they could figure something better out.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex slid to a stop as he turned the corner. His worst suspicions were confirmed. Toga had crumbled to the floor, his belly horribly slit open. Blood was everywhere. Toga's skin was an unhealthy grayish shade, and Sairex was afraid to touch him. It seemed impossible that he would be alive with such a garish wound, and it didn't look like he was breathing.

// You can't die on me, you stubborn bastard...please, Toga...I can't gain one friend just to lose another... I can't lose YOU again... //

It took every ounce of courage he possessed for the raven to reach his quivering fingers out to check for a pulse or any sign of life from the terribly still inu.


	107. Chapter 106

Pride (In the Name of Love) 106 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So I walk up on high, and I step to the edge / To see my world below / And I laugh to myself while the tears roll down / 'cause it's the world I know, it's the world I know...

Ok. That's for me. Sesshy's is more like...hmm....

The lunatic is in my head / The lunatic is in my head / You raise the blade / You make the change / You rearrange me 'til I'm sane / You lock the door / And throw away the key / There's someone in my head / But it's not me...

All that you touch / All that you see / All that you taste / All you feel / All that you love / All that you hate / All you distrust / All you save / All that you give / All that you deal / All that you buy / Beg, borrow or steal / All you create / All you destroy / All that you do / All that you say / All that you eat / And everyone you meet / All that you slight / And everyone you fight / All that is now / All that is gone / All thats to come / And everything under the sun is in tune / But the sun is eclipsed by the moon....

Ahem. Anyway, almost got to chapter 60 in my editing before posting this, and I have the whole day off...plus I'm about four pages deep into another mini-Sesshoumaru sidestory. =D Just so y'all know.

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Sairex was present to feel the last stuttering beat of Toga's heart.

The raven frowned dangerously and sat down. // Nope. Not going to happen. If ever my people and all their tricks and necromancy were worth a damn... I will not let this happen. Toga, you're coming back with me or we're both going. //

Murmuring softly and tracing rapid symbols in the air with his talons, Sairex plucked one of the swords from his hip. He slit open his palm and used his blood to trace another symbol on Toga's forehead, and then traced an identical symbol on his own skin with some of Toga's blood.

Satisfied that all was well, he performed another rapid chant, infusing his sword with energy and then stuck it in the floor. A barrier slowly formed around him and the inu. It wasn't a strong barrier - Sairex wasn't at all proficient with them - but the raven hoped it would deter anyone from touching either of them until he was finished. Interruptions could be very dangerous and seriously undermine the success of his mission.

Sairex frowned, eyes flickering down the hallway as he drew his other sword. // Miroku, I'd do the same for you... if this doesn't work out, please forgive me. I do love you, damn crazy monk... // Sairex smiled slightly and closed his eyes, shifting before beginning a chant he'd never before had the chance to try - it wasn't something one could freely practice.

After all, on the final note, it culminated with the death of the spellcaster. Sairex drove the blade through his heart. He had time to be thankful that the sword was so wickedly sharp and didn't get tangled up in bones so he'd have to try again. That would have been dreadful...

Slowly, the raven fell back limply against the ground, his own death far faster and less painful than his friend's had been.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha and Miroku frowned as Sesshoumaru came to. Almost without having to pause to think about it, the taiyoukai launched himself off the ground at the door. There was a tremendous howl and a violent, sizzling spark of energy as he connected with the sacred barrier Miroku had placed.

The monk winced, wondering very seriously if his barrier was going to hold. Both he and Inuyasha held their breath...but the invisible wall did not break. Miroku let out a small sigh of relief.

Inuyasha offered him a faint smile. "Eh...the raven's training must be paying off some. You HAVE gotten stronger over the past few years. There was a time Sessh would have laughed at your sutras and shit..."

Miroku offered him a wan smile in return. "Well...be that as it may, I'm not so sure it'll hold up to repeated assault. And Sairex's training hasn't really encompassed much in the realm of holy magic, which is only to be expected. He's a demon when it's all said and done. But he has let me practice seals and such against him, so I imagine I've grown a little better. Still...it's Sesshoumaru..."

Inuyasha nodded after a moment. He wasn't about to argue. Sesshoumaru, no matter the level of his mental stability, wasn't a demon to trifle with. It would take a much more practiced, powerful monk than Miroku to have a prayer of truly containing the powerful taiyoukai.

The monk idly trailed his fingers along the side of his staff, thinking. "Something about Sairex affected your brother."

"Yeah, I saw that...it parted the sea of batshit crazy. But I don't know how or why." Inuyasha frowned as he and Miroku watched Sesshoumaru.

The taiyoukai stalked back and forth a few times before sitting down in the middle of the floor and letting his head fall forward, muttering softly to himself.

"What happened before we got there?"

"I saw him plastered against the wall like he fully expected somethin' to be after him and he was hiding...bleeding like a damn waterfall from his forehead...he still is, dammit. I don't have any idea what happened there. He seemed royally pissed off. Then he said something about me tricking him...or someone tricking him using me...or some shit. I don't think he thought I was real. Then I mentioned our old man and he flipped and started screaming at me not to look at him and...fuck, Miroku, I think he was trying to tear out his heart. I stopped him and got slapped into a wall for the effort. Then you two showed up."

Miroku frowned and eyed Sesshoumaru thoughtfully. "He is truly mad, this is obvious...but the fact that, for even an instant, some bit of consciousness intruded...it means that he saw something that directly contradicted the logic and rules of his new reality. Just as if you or I saw something that simply could not be and could only be termed as insanity...the same thing happened to him when he saw Sairex. He was sure that Sairex simply could not be. It wasn't possible."

"So...we wave the raven in front of him until he's back to his supercilious, logical, asshole self?"

Miroku couldn't help but snicker. "Well. Something like that. We have to figure out why, precisely, Sairex's presence so affected him."

"Well, back a few years ago when that dead dragon bastard was here to gloat and shit, he was more than happy to show off that he could mimic my father's body. Fucker can shapeshift. He said he had convinced Sessh that all the shit that happened since he had gotten out the first time was a dream."

Miroku nodded. "Then chances are he did many terrible things using the guise of you and your father and others close to him." The monk paused, then grinned. "But Sesshoumaru didn't know Sairex when he was first captured, before all those things happened! And if everything that happened was really a dream, and he had imagined it all...Sairex could not possibly exist."

"So that's why seein' your bird snapped him out of it for a bit!"

"Well, that's my theory at least. Sesshoumaru probably figured in his typically logical fashion that you were another hallucination sent to torment him as so many before you have been... but Sairex was out of place and impossible, something too detailed to dream up and then find it exists, when there is no way you could know of it unless it was a true memory."

"So we'll have Sairex sit down and chat with him." Inuyasha grinned, and then his grin abruptly vanished. "Fuck..."

"What?"

"If he thought I was just a stupid illusion...then he probably thought the same thing about the old man. And he was out here bleeding his crazy little head off and freaking the fuck out. You KNOW our father wouldn't let him out of his sight unless..."

"Oh hell..." Miroku's eyes widened.

Inuyasha looked torn. He desperately wanted to find out if his father was alright, but knew if his brother broke out that there was no way Miroku could contain Sesshoumaru himself. The hanyou gritted his teeth and placed his back to the wall. "My father can take care of himself...and if Sessh surprised him, Sairex will take care of him. You need me here in case...well."

Miroku sighed heavily and leaned back against the wall next to the hanyou, his heart heavy with worry. // Please be alright, Toga...because if you aren't, and Sesshoumaru was the one to hurt you...there won't be a damn thing we can do to keep him sane once he finds out. Assuming we can get him sane in the first place... //

The two sighed and watched Sesshoumaru, although neither of them could hear what it was the taiyoukai was saying...and were grateful for that.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It really was impossible. He must simply be hallucinating.

The raven could not exist.

His brother, his father...these were frequent ghosts that had haunted him since he awoke in captivity once more. They were simply images conjured up to eat at his straining mind. Although he hadn't seen his brother's ghost in a while, his father...

His FATHER!

Sesshoumaru let out a low, keening whine. "My Lord Father... you would be so horrifically ashamed and disgusted by us... we lusted sinfully for you...oh, so many visions and twisted fantasies. The dragon was right. I AM sick. What son obsesses so, even in dreams, of mating their father?"

// But we loved him. //

"Of course we loved him. He was our world. He was everything to us. He was the only one that meant anything to us until we began to care for Inuyasha and Rin. But that's normal. He was our father. Of course we loved him. He cared for us and raised us from a tiny pup when SHE discarded us." Sesshoumaru's eyes flickered to the window, but the moon was obscured by a passing cloud and thus did not get scorched by his malicious glare. "But that does not give us the right to lust for him sexually!"

// You know that we always loved him too much. We always loved him, held him above all others. We never took a mate because no one else could touch our heart. Their light was nothing but a candle in the face of the sun in comparison to our Lord Father. We just never acknowledged how deeply that love ran. //

"That doesn't make it any more right! Even if you aren't wrong. All we ever wanted to do was be near him. Even as a puppy he was the only one that understood us. He was the only one to accept us as we were. He was the only one that did not treat us as a Lord, but as Sesshoumaru. We did not have to follow any codes or honor any social restrictions...we could simply be. He would not judge us. He always loved us, no matter what."

// And then you came up with some excuse as you began to mature that lust and love was stupid...because you didn't even want to consider desiring someone else when you'd already found perfection. //

"Don't blame me, you sanctimonious bastard. You're just as much at fault as I am."

// Fine. But you know its true. We always sought perfection, and you had found that perfection in another... in the only person that would ever love Sesshoumaru just because he was Sesshoumaru. The epitome of beauty and grace, the pinnacle of power....smooth-spoken, open-hearted, amusing, intelligent...our Lord Father is truly a god made flesh. It is no wonder all the world bows to him. And we were always so painfully grateful to hold a unique place in his heart, to be noticed by him...held in high regard by him. There was a difference in the way he looked at us compared to the rest of the world, and it made us feel so...special. //

"Are you trying to say we lived in denial for nearly the past seven hundred years?"

// I absolutely am. How could it be anything but? You never felt even a glimmer of desire for anyone else, even in your awkward teenage years when all those damn hormones were waking up... //

"This Sesshoumaru was never awkward."

// Well...I suppose not. But you know I'm right. Even in the extremity of your newborn desires, you had no inclination to pursue another. //

"They were not worthy."

// How could anyone be when held in comparison? You yourself made it impossible. You instead worshiped at the altar of our Lord Father. You know it was not truly contempt for humans that made us so resent Izayoi. It was jealousy. //

"Watch yourself...I have no compunctions about finding a way to tear you out of my head."

// It's the truth and you know it. You didn't just hate her because she was human...or even that she so distracted our Lord Father or took up his time. You hated her because you felt replaced...you hated her because he WANTED her in a way he would not want us, because we lusted for him in the darkest places of our soul! WE wanted to be the one so intimately loved and cherished, lost in the ecstasy that only he was worthy to bring to us... //

"Shut up..."

// And then.... then he died. And we died with him, didn't we... //

"Yes.... life did not matter anymore. We had invested too much of ourself in him. We loved him above all others. We would have followed him, if it had not meant losing the lands he had worked so hard for and cherished so dearly. That would have displeased him greatly."

// Everything was hollow. Who was there to talk to that would understand us? Who was there to show things to? Who was there to care about us as simply Sesshoumaru? There was no one else. Without him, we were alone without hope of redemption. And even still, even in the extremity of our loneliness, we did not acknowledge how deeply our love ran. Gods, we were a broken thing. And now, two hundred some years after his death, we finally realize how much more he meant to us than we cared to admit....we acknowledge the truth of our carefully forgotten dreams over the centuries, the heart of our jealousy for the human wench... oh, we are sick...but we wanted him, so terribly badly. We still do. //

"We cannot have him. Not only would he scorn us, be disgusted by our twisted lust...he has been dead for two hundred years. We still should have admitted it...then. How could we lie to our Lord Father...to ourself?..."

// You always lie to us, Sesshoumaru... you pretend we do not feel at all, that emotions are a waste of time...because you are too afraid of being hurt. You are too afraid to open yourself and be thrown out and discarded again, to be unwanted before they even have a chance to know you...as SHE did. //

"Have we truly so lusted for our Lord Father....since we were small? Since we knew what lust was?... "

// It was never, ever simple lust...we loved him, completely, in all ways. Only in giving ourself to him, offering ourself to him as a sacrifice, could we hope to find ourself. He was...everything...the only thing. //

"We picked a fine time to realize it... hundreds of years after he is gone."

// It does not help that his ghost keeps appearing before us, so real...and taunting and tormenting us. The other ghosts are less difficult to deal with. Our mother is trying to hurt us again...but why? She has not sent these specters and tricks of the moonlight after us in a long time. //

"Nor have we thought of the illusion of escape in so long...but we will wake eventually, in that dragon's claws. He is our reality now. We will never be free of him....and does it even matter if we were?"

// No. Not really. Nothing matters. One place or another, our heart is long dead...and I won't let you feel the pain anymore. The dragon does not deserve our pain. //

A slight smile twitched Sesshoumaru's lips as he almost lovingly ran his claws down his arms, watching the bright red lines bloom under the sharp tips. He didn't hear Inuyasha's sudden yelp at the sight anymore than he felt the pain. There was no pain, after all.

Pain and emotion and feeling were things from his old life...and Tsetsukosei deserved and would get none of it, no matter what illusions the beast thrust at him.

Besides...the crimson rivers flowing from his pale skin were so beautiful, and always brought such a heavy, dark sense of peace...

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Yes, Sesshoumaru's conversation is held entirely with himself...half of it within his own mind.


	108. Chapter 107

Pride (In the Name of Love) 107 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - If the bullshit that is my life continues as it is, soon I'll be just as fucked up as Sesshoumaru. So if I start gibbering, sorry. Maybe its already too late. It's almost sad that touching you people through my story is the only social contact I have at all these days. I grow lonely with nothing but trees and cows and abusive psychopathic jailer-mothers.

Sometime soon I'll be gone for a few days due to forced remodeling in my bedroom. The chance of me having comp access in that time is slim. Hell, the chance of me having a place to sleep is slim. Sorry this chapter took so long...work and crap made my update late. I didn't even get the chance to sit down and start writing until 10p. Lol...hoping to make it before midnight.

And anything underworld-ish I do in this chapter is purely my own take and has nothing to do with anything, canon or not. It's just how things are in my world.

Anyone want to adopt an author? I'm low maintenance, even if I am a bit crazy.

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Sairex slowly blinked open his eyes, although he was careful to be slow about it. It seemed everything was going according to plan. His soul was being whisked along by the netherworld imps. For now, Sairex allowed them to shuffle him along. It was not yet the time to act. Let them think he was incoherent and blank, as he should be.

Sairex had never actually been to the land of the dead, but his people had made a long practice of messing with it. There was much research that the raven had locked within his mind. Even still, he had little idea of what to expect.

The landscape was reminiscent of the Black Circle, the raven noted with more than a little amusement, although it was less shadowy. The ground was a dark, rusty brown and largely barren, with massive rocks jutting up in various places. Sairex noted the winding, dark silvery line of a massive river, and he got soul-shivers. So this, then, was the River Styx...the barrier that kept most of the dead where they belonged.

The imps shuffled Sairex into line to wait his turn on the ferry. Once he was secure in the mindless throng, the imps escorting him departed. A lone, robed demon was taking care of things from this point.

A quick scan didn't reveal anything noteworthy, nor did he spot Toga in the short line, so Sairex maintained the facade of simply being another soul while pondering how terribly inefficient it seemed to be to have a single ferryman taking one soul at a time across the river...this terrible river that was so slow on the surface but ran with fierce and terrible power below. Sairex could feel unnameable, old, powerful things lurking there.

Finally, it was the raven's turn to shuffle up into the boat and he did. As soon as he was across, he would make his escape and get Toga...and then somehow find a way BACK across this terrible barrier. He knew somehow, instinctively, that any effort to cross it by flight would fail as utterly as swimming...and he seriously doubted there were any bridges across the massive expanse.

The ferryman was about Sairex's height and wearing shapeless robes. He could not see the things face, but one look at the pale and delicate hands on the guide pole told him that this creature was likely female.

// Hmm. I must admit, I'm terribly curious as to what manner of creature lives here...how this all works... but now is not the time to find out. I have to figure out how the hell to find Toga and then how to get us both out of here and alive again. My spell will tether me, but I don't know the best way to bring him back...either way...I won't leave without him.//

He didn't expect the little boat to stop halfway to the opposite shore, jolting him out of his thoughts. The ferryman...or woman, as it turned out, turned to face him.

"You can drop the act."

Sairex didn't move for a moment, wondering if he had heard her correctly...then a smirk twitched his lips. Yes, he had been caught. "Zo you noticed."

The woman snorted. "Bird, I've been doing this job for thousands of years, since that poor sap Charon had the bad taste to fall into the River. Not a good idea, that." She slowly pulled back her hood. Sairex blinked, surprised to see a young and rather human looking woman with long black hair and ice-blue eyes. "So...tell me. How is it you're conscious, and why?"

"Da how is a long ztory. Da vhy...vell."

"It has something to do with the inu, doesn't it?"

Sairex blinked, rather taken aback. "How did you..."

The woman smirked. "I don't believe in coincidence and all the people up in the office are flipping out about him. I figure...two strange occurrences in so short a time...probably related."

The raven chuckled softly. "Flipping out, are dey? Vhy?"

"Well, seems he was yanked out of here through means that they've never seen. Losing a powerful demon's soul and being unable to account for why or how causes some heads to turn."

Sairex barely bit down a smirk. // Miroku and his...communicating with Tenseiga...ah, my monk... // "Indeed..."

"And then the soul shows up again, normal as can be. They woke him up for questioning and then were going to Lethe him to be safe, but I hear things aren't going to well."

"Lethe?"

The ferry-woman sighed, poking at the Styx's dark waters with her pole. "Water is...a big part of the world of the dead. This is the River Styx, which encircles the entirety of the underworld, creating a barrier. There is an underground spring that the office was built around. They made it into a fountain. Anyway, the spring is called Lethe. The water has the power to completely erase the memories from one's life. It is generally standard procedure before any soul is resurrected to live again that they are given the water of Lethe, so they can go on with their new life unburdened by the old."

Sairex's eyes widened significantly. If Toga had drank any of that...!

"I'm Saris, by the way. Anyhow...it seems the people at the office underestimated your inu friend. When they woke him up, he got somewhat growly and was absolutely frantic to get out of here to take care of his son. It ended in some sort of conflict and I don't know whats going on now."

Sairex paused and then squinted at Saris. "Vhy are you telling me dis?"

"Because I'm bored. You don't know how tedious an afterlife this is. All day, every day...and night, for that matter....ferry across dead souls or talk to the listkeepers at either side... meh. It's my punishment of sorts for my life."

"Vhat did you do?"

"I was something of a gray area. I was a born warrior, and my clan often proved their mettle by combat to death...within our ranks and without. I killed a lot of people. I didn't do it out of a sense of evil, it was just how my life was...but...eh. The people at the office had an opening after Charon and they offered me five thousand years of this and then I could rest in eternal peace, rather than having to risk hell or go through a lengthy judgment case."

Sairex nodded slowly. "Lucky for you, I zuppose."

"Eh. Sometimes I don't know. But I'm about half done with my sentence."

"Zo you don't fear to get in trouble by talking to me?"

"Talking to you? I never noticed you were conscious, you hid it too well. I'm entirely innocent, and would never talk to you because I occasionally like to see the stuffed shirts up in the office have things go not according to plan. Tell me...what's really going on? I'm curious."

Sairex grinned. "I underztand. I'm here to bring da inu home. He didn't lie. His zon does need him." The raven paused, thinking. "His zon vas taken by a dracolich and abused terribly. His zon is...vell. He's really a good kid at heart, he just has alvays had zome...mental issues. Da only one dat ever really ztood a chance to reach him vas Toga...da inu I'm retrieving. Right now, his zon is truly mad. Vithout Toga, he von't recover...and if he did recover to find he killed his beloved father...vell."

"Ah...poor kid. Well, I wish ya the best of luck. And if you come back tonight, I might just be entirely off guard and chatting on the riverbank with one of the list keepers, leaving my boat entirely open. Not that there is ever anything to worry about...no one would EVER grab hold of it and take off....nor would I ever have to tell anyone that there's a trick to this whole river thing and it's largely propelled by spiritual energy....just stick the pole in the water and concentrate. You don't really push off of anything. Careful in the middle, though, there are things that'll eat it."

Sairex smiled and nodded his head in gratitude. "Tank you...

Soon they reached the other side of the river. The moment the raven's feet hit solid ground again, he took off. There was a startled cry from the previously bored-looking demon that was checking souls in. Saris let out a startled-sounded gasp of her own before hiding her grin under her cowl and heading back across the river.

Sairex moved swiftly, pausing only to test the magical tether he had left with his body. It was still secure. Good.

The raven kept within sight of the long and relatively straight road leading from the docks. He assumed that this was the way to the 'office' Saris had mentioned, and his suspicions proved correct. It did not take long for an impressive palace to loom into view.

Nor did it take long for Sairex to find Toga once he got near the palace - the inu was in his true form and bounding through the courtyard in heated battle with dozens of dark things. Toga had been snared on a few long cables, but was so far evading further attempts to bind him. Every time a new binding would be secured around him he'd break free of another.

// That's my Toga... // Sairex smiled in amusement. He could sense the distant approach of something much stronger, however...something that shone with wild spirit-energy. // And that would be the answer to their problems. Seems I don't have a lot of time. //

Sairex flew in next to Toga and barely managed to backpedal enough to avoid being chomped in half. "Ack!"

Toga blinked in surprise as it caught up to him that this was not another enemy. "Sairex?!"

"Yeah, yeah...causing trouble, are ve?"

"I cannot stay here!"

"Vell, I learned zome terribly interesting tings on my vay here...vithout vhich, I might add, ve both probably vould have been ztuck here forever. And you vould never have known. Dey vere planning on erasing your memories."

"WHAT?!"

"Yep. And dere is zometing big coming. Ve have to go. Now." Sairex helped Toga beat off his attackers as much as he was able, but the nimble raven spent more of his focus on freeing the raging inu from his bonds.

Sairex couldn't understand a word the dark, robed creatures that were assailing them were screaming. He did have the presence of mind to leap on Toga's broad back and grab hold as the inu leapt over the wall and took off, however.

"Ve just need to head for da river by nightfall."

"River?"

"Yep, down dis path. You vere probably out of it vhen you arrived."

"Sairex...how is it you are here?"

Sairex fidgeted a bit, idly toying with some of Toga's fur. "Er....vell, zomeone had to come for you...Zezzhoumaru needs you an' all..."

Toga's eyes widened and he stopped dead. Sairex eeped and almost went flying. Toga abruptly shifted to his humanoid form, catching the raven when he dropped and giving him a very serious stare. "You....are not alive?"

"Vell, neither are you...how else vas I going to come and get you?... Toga...you're needed. If dis is not changed...and I did noting to try to change it vhen I tink I can..."

"You died to come and get me..."

"Not vithout a plan. I can get back."

"Oh...I didn't realize you ... knew how to bounce back and forth between living and death like that..."

Sairex fidgeted a bit, wondering if Toga was going to bother putting him down. "Vell...."

"Well what?"

"Its not zometing I've tried before or vill try again if I can avoid it."

Toga's eyes widened and he stared at Sairex. "Damn crazy raven...what if it hadn't worked? What about your family?"

"I vould have done da zame for any of dem...I don't vant to lose you again zo zoon, Toga. I ... zuggest ve keep moving. Ve only have a narrow timeframe to vork vith if ve are going to escape...and...er...you can put me down...." Sairex ducked his head to hide his growing blush.

"I'll carry you." Toga did set Sairex down, but only long enough to take his true form back on. "Now lets head home before someone else comes looking for us. I've had entirely too much excitement for one day."


	109. Chapter 108

Pride (In the Name of Love) 108 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Whew. Finally got my editing done, as much as I'll ever have it done that is. Fancy new updated chapter heading, reworded a few difficult spots, fixed some of Sairex's things that no longer meshed properly...no major content changes throughout. But it's as pretty as my limited knowledge knows how to make it. Any further errors I've missed and will not catch...so you guys can point them out if ya find em. Now I have to spend the time reloading them on all my sites...so if y'all get spammed with update notices or somethin', there's only one new chapter a day. The rest is me fixing stuff.

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"Miroku, take down the damn barrier!"

Miroku frowned uneasily, looking between Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai was sitting on the floor and rocking slightly, a blissful, enraptured look on his face as he clawed his arms open further. He seemed utterly fascinated and somewhat soothed by the sight of his own blood.

Inuyasha, on the other hand, was frantic with understandable worry as he watched his brother carving himself like a turkey.

"Inuyasha, I know you're worried about Sesshoumaru, but if I take down this barrier, who knows what will happen? Neither one of us...both of us together can't stop him if he flips out..."

"What the fuck does that matter if he bleeds to death?!"

"I know how cruel this is going to sound, but Inuyasha, I don't think he will. Do you think Tsetsukosei stopped him every time he cut himself open? Do you think this is the first time? Besides, what do you think he'll do to you if you get that close to him? He doesn't even believe you're real."

Inuyasha let out a low whine and slowly sat back down. Miroku was right, he knew...but that didn't make it easier for him to accept. He closed his eyes and flattened his ears back, trying to drown out the sound of Sesshoumaru's quiet conversation.

Miroku, on the other hand, edged slowly closer to the room, wondering what it was that the taiyoukai was saying and wondering if he would gain any insight by listening.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

// I wonder when we will wake up. //

"I don't know. Possibly by morning."

// Perhaps we will not until we destroy all the illusions. This place can be no more real than any of the others. You know as well as I do that we're still in that cell. //

"I am tired, though. I feel...heavy."

// Well, we could rest, then...if you are too weak. //

"This Sesshoumaru is not too weak for anything!" The taiyoukai growled and hauled himself jerkily, unsteadily to his feet. His eyes rolled as he tried to focus on the room. His vision was dark around the edges and he felt lethargic from blood loss. He moved across the room and carefully shut the curtains. "I will not have her watching."

// Well, of course not. She might stop us or change the game. //

Sesshoumaru nodded. "I already thought of that, fool." The taiyoukai looked around the room and held out his fingers. His light whip flared into existence, although the power creating the lash was erratic and not properly focused. The discipline and control Sesshoumaru usually employed with the deadly whip was absent.

But that did not stop the force of its destruction. With a satisfied smirk, Sesshoumaru began laying waste to the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku yelped and darted back from the doorway. Inuyasha jumped to his feet, his eyes wide. "Wh..What the fuck is he doing?"

"I don't know...he was talking to himself and then started just...well."

Inuyasha watched as Sesshoumaru rendered everything in the room into scrap, then even began lashing at the walls. Luckily, by that point, the taiyoukai's energy was drained and his whip slowly stuttered and then vanished. Sesshoumaru slid bonelessly to his knees amidst the destruction and didn't move for a long time, again murmuring to himself quietly.

Inuyasha's eyes widened when his brother's gaze shifted to stare intently at him. The taiyoukai grinned and nodded before tensing and leaping towards the doorway claws-first, intent on furthering the destruction of his 'illusions'.

Inuyasha scrambled backwards and winced when Sesshoumaru hit Miroku's barrier. Sesshoumaru bounced back in a shower of sizzling sparks. The taiyoukai howled and then tried again...and again.

Miroku whispered a fervent prayer as he poured his energy into maintaining the barrier, even though he could feel it breaking far faster than he could repair it.

Sesshoumaru stopped after a few more leaps, a rather blank look in his eyes. He staggered and made a few exhausted swipes at the barrier...and then fell over in an unconscious heap.

Miroku almost fell over himself. The ward had been strained to its utmost limit - even a weak demon could have destroyed it by this point. The monk was exhausted. He leaned heavily on his staff and offered a silent prayer of thanks that the shield had held long enough. "I hope he stays down, Inuyasha...I have nothing left."

The hanyou sighed and idly swiped the barrier open himself, kneeling next to Sesshoumaru with a frown. "I feel so helpless. What can I do? My brother is fucked up beyond repair."

Miroku sighed. "I wish I could tell you anything that'd help out...but I'm clueless. I've never dealt with anyone insane before. It doesn't help that he's so powerful. A crazy human is bad enough. A crazy taiyoukai of Sesshoumaru's caliber..."

"Yeah, I hear ya. It's a good thing we have my old man on our side."

Miroku's spine straightened and he frowned. "True...but it's been an awfully long time since Sairex went to go check up on him. I'm getting worried."

"They probably just got talking or something. The only threat was Sessh here...even if he did somethin' to my father, your raven would still be fine."

"Still...I'm going to go check up on them. It's been too long."

Inuyasha nodded, knowing that there was nothing else Miroku could do here anyways. The monk was utterly exhausted and it was probably better to keep him out of Sesshoumaru's way, should the inu wake. "Alright. I'm...I'm going to go try and get him cleaned up some. I might not be able to fix what's wrong with him, but I don't have to look at him like this."

With a nod, the two parted ways.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It took Miroku a lot longer than normal to feel the spiritual energy swirling in the hallway ahead. // Hrm. Wonder what Sairex is up to?... //

His heart almost stopped when he turned the corner and took in the sight before him. His staff clattered to the floor as his fingers went slack and numb.

Toga was sprawled in a veritable sea of blood, his stomach torn wide open. Even from the end of the hall Miroku could tell that he was dead - the unfocused stare of blank golden eyes left little doubt. Even now, the pain he had been in was clear. Sairex had fallen back against him, his sword still protruding from his chest. His expression was far more peaceful, however.

Miroku couldn't make sense of what he was seeing...nor could he understand why the raven had erected a barrier or why it was still standing if his mate was dead. The monk took a few hesitant steps forward before breaking into a run. "Sairex! Toga! Oh, gods, no...!"

The barrier held and the monk was too drained to break through it. He slid to his knees, tears streaking down his cheeks. // Sairex, why? Why would you...I know he meant a lot to you, but didn't I mean enough? He dies and you have to follow him?...I don't understand...can't believe you would kill yourself. What about me, what about Ali? And why the barrier? I don't understand! //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha winced as he finally cut the last of the hopelessly tangled mess that was Sesshoumaru's hair free of his head. He stalwartly attempted to ignore how damned weird his brother looked without it and reminded himself it'd grow back within a couple days.

That done, he settled in to finish the cleaning-up process. It was a bit of a feat to wash Sesshoumaru's unconscious body and keep him from submerging in the tub at the same time, but Inuyasha knew that his brother needed a lot more of a scrubbing than he could be given with a simple cloth and basin of water.

Eventually he was satisfied with his work. He wrapped some fresh bandages around Sesshoumaru's arms and slowly wrestled him into some clean white sleeping pants. // Damn, they hardly fit...you lost a lot of weight. I can count your ribs. Its not like you carry enough extra weight at any time that you can afford to ever starve yourself... //

Inuyasha sighed and scooped Sesshoumaru up, wondering where he should put him. As badly as he wanted to take him to his bedroom and leave him there...he didn't trust his brother's reactions when he woke.

A thought occurred to him. The dungeon room Toga had furnished when Sairex had suffered his own bout of insanity was still set up like a bedroom. That would have to do for now. The hanyou slowly picked his way down the stairs to settle his brother in, but he didn't leave him there alone. He settled down in a chair to wait and watch over him.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Damn it..." Sairex hissed suddenly.

"What?" Toga's voice drifted back as the inu continued to lope along at a ground-devouring pace.

"Miroku found me. Vell. More zpecifically, us."

"It was bound to happen eventually." Toga winced inwardly. He felt fine now, but what a painful way to die. He had heard stomach wounds were one of the worst ways to go and now he understood why. Nothing he'd suffered previously, not even his first death, had fully prepared him for it. "I take it you...died...near me?"

"Kaa. I probably fell on you."

"I still say you're crazy, raven. You never should have."

"Toga..." Sairex sighed. // Don't make me say it. Please. I can't...I don't know what to do about all this, I just...I can't lose you again. I'm not doing this JUST for Sesshoumaru. //

Toga's voice was surprisingly soft, given that he was in his true form. "Had I the ability to do the same for you and our situations were reversed, I can't say I wouldn't have done the same."

"You're complicating dis whole ting, you know."

"What, by growing weary of denying the fact that I'm still in love with you? It's been all I could do not to act on it. It'd be different...it never would have happened if I hadn't been with you before. I'm not one to cheat on a mate, the thought doesn't even register with me...but...hells. I don't know. I'm as confused as you are. I don't know what's right any more. What I do know is that I cannot ever thank you enough for what you're doing for me now. Let's worry about this when our more immediate problem is solved, though."

Sairex swallowed thickly before mumbling an agreement. He didn't bother to deny his urge to bury his face in the thick ruff of fur at Toga's neck, his eyes closing as he silently prayed Miroku wouldn't disrupt the spell, just as he prayed that some answer for his dilemma would present itself. His heart ached and he didn't know what to do. He desperately loved Miroku and would never want to hurt him...but he couldn't live in denial either.

"Is that the river?"

Sairex shook himself to the present and nodded. He couldn't help but smile at the sight of the empty boat parked at the docks. Saris was there, as she said she'd be, chatting with the demon listkeeper a good distance away, surely far enough that they could get the boat out of reach before he could reach them. // Thank you, Saris...and I hope your sentence goes smoothly. Don't know what we would have done without you. //

The boatwoman noticed them and wanted to wave, but she knew her part was done. She looked just as shocked as her companion when the large white dog came sailing out of nowhere and leaped onto the ferry. She managed to spare Sairex a wink when the other demon wasn't paying attention even as she scrambled to make it look like she was at least attempting to get her boat back.

Sairex snagged the guide-pole up and propelled them out into the River Styx, smiling as the fog swirled around them and left them in the middle of the dark water, shrouded from view on either shore. "Remember, next time we do die...we owe her."

Toga slid back into his humanoid form and sat down. "Of course. So...we're free of the barrier, then. Now what?"

"Not zure. I have to find a vay to bring you back vith me and hope dat I can tend your vound enough dat you don't die again...but I zuppose we'll cross dat bridge vhen ve get dere. I just have to get us back before Miroku breaks my tether or ve're both in trouble."


	110. Chapter 109

Pride (In the Name of Love) 109 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Another sidestory was posted yesterday - Serenity (named after the Godsmack song of the same name) - starring one mini-Sesshoumaru. Be sure to check it out. =D I also accept new plotbunnies for sidestories...especially since I have the editing finally done. They don't have to be big...just a little idea or two and I can go from there. I'm especially a fan of Sesshy when he was young...lol.

I've more or less got my editing done, I'm just re-uploading all my fixed chapters now. I could have had THAT all done, I'm sure, if I wasn't stuck on uber-slow dialup.

A funny fact for you all - I had a HELL of a time editing any of the...intimate...parts in this or my sidestories. They made me blush terribly and I kept averting my eyes and not wanting to look directly at them or feeling terribly naughty if I did. And I wrote the damn things in the first place... XD

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"So...what's the plan?"

Sairex glanced at Toga. "Vhat in da hell makes you tink I have a plan?"

Toga sighed. "You really ARE crazy. I mean it, this time."

Sairex smirked. "Vell...I tethered myzelf. If I can get to da place vhere I first came here, I can make da jump back. Da problem is...I ztill have a zvord in my heart and you vere gutted like a fish. I'm vorried if I pull us back, ve'll just die again unless zomeone tinks to patch us up."

"Well, can't you...contact your monk somehow?"

"No. Da living can't hear da dead, it vould drive dem inza-" Sairex stopped and glanced at Toga. "I just had a helluva idea..."

"...Are you sure it wont hurt him?"

"You don't zeem to have yet had da pleasure of zpeaking vith your Zezzhoumaru zince his return. Noting I do could make it any vorse."

Toga growled low in his chest, mulling over the idea and not really finding it to his liking. Sairex frowned.

"Toga, look. Ve don't have a lot of options or a lot of time. And if ve DO run out of time, vell, dat's it. Ve both ztay dead. Do you tink anyting anyone does vill have any effect on Zezzhoumaru if you're dead? Especially if he finds out it vas he himzelf dat killed you? Isn't it vorth da risk?"

"I do not like it, even if he has no mind to speak of to damage, Sairex...but fine. Just...make it brief."

Sairex nodded and sat down lotus-style as he began to concentrate.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha jerked awake when Sesshoumaru sat up. His brother was scowling and seemed to be having some sort of internal debate.

"Why do you sound strange?...Hn. Why would we care to do any such thing?...Hn, the hanyou is not real. Fool..."

Eventually his gaze flickered over to Inuyasha, looking rather annoyed. "There are two dead bodies that must be bandaged and healed upstairs, hanyou, but they must not be moved."

Inuyasha frowned. "Why in the hell would anyone bandage a dead body?"

Sesshoumaru growled and shook his head hard, hunching over, his claws trembling near his head as if about to strike. "GET OUT OF OUR HEAD!!!"

Inuyasha yelped as Sesshoumaru launched himself at the wall, cracking his skull hard against the stone, hard enough that it dropped him in a heap and a flower of blood blossomed at the point of impact.

"SHIT! Sessh, damn it!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex yelped and jerked as the connection was violently severed. He wobbled and almost fell over the side of the ferry and probably would have if Toga hadn't grabbed hold of him.

"What the hell happened?"

Sairex gave Toga a guilty look. "I...got troo and...he troo me out. Violently."

"Is Sesshoumaru alright?"

Sairex winced and rubbed at his head. He had felt everything the crazy taiyoukai had in his brief contact...had heard the whispers of other voices in Sesshoumaru's head, the distant maniacal laughter...and he had felt when Sesshoumaru's head smacked into the wall too.

"I...no, Toga. He's not. Not just because of me. I vas in his head, and...ve need to help him."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku finally found Inuyasha down in the dungeons. He was choking down his own grief as much as he was able, but knew his friend deserved to know about his father. Inuyasha knew something was wrong before he even saw Miroku or heard a word from the grieved monk - Miroku was covered with blood.

Inuyasha's eyes were huge as he looked at his friend. "Wh...what's going on now?"

"Sairex and...and your father. They...they're...." Miroku clenched his fists, struggling to keep his voice steady but failing, unable to choke back a sob.

Inuyasha frowned as he turned his gaze back to Sesshoumaru. "You crazy bastard, did you actually know something about this that I don't?..."

Miroku blinked at Inuyasha's odd comment. "What?"

"Before my brother tried to drive his skull through the wall he told me...that there were two dead bodies upstairs that needed to be bandaged up and healed, but we couldn't move them. And then you come here...to...to tell me that..."

Miroku's eyes lit up. // Figures you'd have some sort of plan, damn crazy bird... though why you'd choose to contact us through Sesshoumaru of all people is beyond me. // "Well...there's a barrier around them. I don't know what...happened to your father...it was probably Sesshoumaru. But Sairex..." Miroku swallowed hard. "Sairex did himself in, but I thought there was something strange about it. He put up a barrier around them."

"Well...I guess it...even if it's just crazy talking, I guess it couldn't hurt to try."

Miroku nodded and the two of them made their way upstairs. Inuyasha couldn't fully contain his emotions at the gruesome scene. "Fuck me..."

"Can you take down the barrier? I'm too weak right now or I'd have done it myself." // And probably would have screwed everything up... // Miroku bit back the chilly dread that had welled up inside of him at THAT unsettling thought.

"Yeah, it's not a very strong one." With a few solid strikes, Inuyasha was able to break Sairex's barrier and he and Miroku set about tending to injuries, trying very hard to ignore how lifeless their patients were.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex grinned abruptly. "Vell, looks like your pup got da message troo. Inuyazha and Miroku are working on patching us up right now. I'll be pretty easy, I imagine, but you..."

"I imagine it wasn't very pretty."

"Not at all. How in da hell did...I mean..."

"He's fast and I never, ever thought that my Sesshoumaru would try to kill me." Toga closed his eyes, wincing.

"He vasn't doing it consciously, you know. He tinks you're all hallucinations and illusions. He vould never ztrike you for real, Toga. Da boy loves you too much."

"I know, I know...it just...still hurt. Heh. I ached to see him every minute of every day for three years, and the moment he's conscious, he runs me through. Fate has a cruel sense of humor."

"Dats for damn zure." Sairex turned to face Toga more fully, noting the disheartened look on the inu's face. "Hey...vhat's dat look for?"

"He doesn't even think I'm real. How can I ... what do I do? All I want to do is hold him. I'm so grateful that he's back after so long. I didn't....didn't think he would be. And he doesn't even think I'm anything but a hallucination. If anything, my presence only makes it WORSE."

Sairex frowned and slid over, hesitating for a moment before hooking his arms around the inu and giving him a tight hug. "Cheer up. Tink of it dis vay. Before ve got him back...he didn't tink you vere anyting but an illusion AND dere vas no chance of dat changing. He vas ztill having his mind damaged further. But now ve can ztart to fix tings. It might take a vhile, but...ve'll get you your Zezzhoumaru back."

Toga sighed before returning the hug, sitting down and hauling the raven into his lap. Sairex eeped as he was hauled off his feet to land less than gracefully in his new seat.

"You know, one of dese days, I'm going to become quite cross vith da vay you people all just toss me around like I'm a ztuffed toy."

"You weigh about as much as one. It invites throwing about."

Sairex snorted and jabbed a finger into Toga's chest. "Hn. Just you vait. One of dese days..."

"What, you'll throw ME around?"

"Nah...couldn't do dat. You damn inu types veigh too much."

Toga couldn't help but chuckle - Sairex had a way of making him feel better no matter how determined he was to be miserable. "Are you calling me fat?"

"Vell, you vere da one dat zaid it...you could probably use a couple laps around da courtyard vhen ve get home." Sairex poked Toga in the sides and blinked when the inu jumped and let out a startled little laugh. Yellow eyes widened. "You're kidding...you're ticklish?"

Toga shook his head vehemently. "I most certainly am NOT."

Sairex crowed in amusement and immediately attempted to exploit Toga's newfound vulnerability, getting several good pokes in before the inu snagged his wrists.

"Stop that...!"

Sairex snickered. "Da most powerful demon in da vorld...ticklish! Kaaa!"

"You, Sairexannaras, are absolutely incorrigible. HEY!" Toga broke out into helpless laughter as Sairex curled a wing and drug the tips of his feathers along the back of Toga's neck. The inu tried to shift to grapple the offending wing, but couldn't very well let go of Sairex's hands either.

"Ack! If you don't ztop squirming zo much you'll knock da boat over!"

"As if I'm going to let YOU best me, you fiendish bird! You will rue the day you made this discovery!...Well, go on! Start rueing!"

Sairex couldn't help but laugh as he ended up pinned flat on his back, unable to bring his wings to bear. Really, he had absolutely no prayer of out-wrestling Toga. Speed didn't count for much when you were grappling, after all.

"Are YOU ticklish, bird?"

"No. You build up zometing of an immunity to it vhen you live your whole life attached to a buncha feathers." Sairex wiggled the tips of his wings to illustrate his point.

"I always knew how to put you in your place, though..."

Sairex's eyes flew wide as Toga leaned in close, a mere hairsbreadth from him. Breathing was suddenly a rather difficult feat. "T..Toga...vhat are you doing?"

"Hell if I know..." the inu muttered before closing the distance between them and capturing the raven's lips with his own.


	111. Chapter 110

Pride (In the Name of Love) 110 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Just, like...so y'all know? I'm SUCH a pervert. Miroku ain't got nothin' on me. Well. I don't do the grab-assing...but...I am permanently stuck in the gutter. Any time I try and come up with sidestory plotlines, no matter the characters, my mind takes a nosedive back into my hentai-nature. I've come up with some VERY inappropriate ideas...Heh. Heh heh. Hehehehehehehehehe...

Sesshoumaru - And I'm her favorite. She's going to warp my tender young self.

Toga - *rubs his back soothingly* Heh. I'm sure it will be alright...

Sessh - *flat look* Most of her sidestories involving me involve YOU TOO.

Toga - Erk. Where do we petition for a new author...?

....Yeah, well, luckily for you two, I said in 'Pride' canon there was nothing perverse that occurred previously between you two....

Sessh and Toga - *sighs of relief*

....but I'm not above a divergence from canon now and then. BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHA!

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Toga groaned softly as he settled into the task of kissing the stuffing out of Sairex. Memories and echoes of long forgotten sensation exploded in his mind. The taste of this exotic creature...the way the raven's long-limbed frame fit against him, so delicate and seemingly fragile in comparison to his own...and the way he leaned up against him, helpless to escape but never really wanting to. The kiss was so intoxicating and Sairex was so hot, and...and those talons, digging carefully into his chest and pushing at him?... oh shit... OH SHIT!

Toga's mind finally caught up with his body and he pulled back, his eyes widening. "Oh shit...Sairex, I...I'm sorry..."

"Don't apologize. It...It's not like I don't feel it too. But I don't tink you really mean it. You've been hurting and lonely and you vant to have zome zense of comfort and love. You finally tink you're going to get it vhen ve bring Zezzhoumaru home and inztead you get zkewered."

"I....I'm sorry. When I said earlier that we'd talk, this....wasn't what I intended."

Sairex grinned a bit and snagged the guide pole, still trying to get his breathing under control. Damn, but Toga had always been an amazing kisser...and it was so hard to deny him, despite the raven's deep love for his mate. It had taken all of the Sairex's considerable willpower to make even a feeble effort to push him away and snap the inu back to his senses. "Really, its ok. Don't beat yourzelf up over it. Ve'll vorry about it later. Let's just focus on getting home, eh?"

Toga gave him a half-hearted smile. "Yes...that would be a good idea."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha sighed in sleepy contentment as skilled hands lovingly soothed the tension from his muscles. He had fallen asleep while Sesshoumaru-watching...apparently, his elder brother had knocked himself out good and hard and was not about to come to any time soon. This made for a rather boring show and the hanyou had fallen asleep. The stone floor in the dungeon wasn't terribly comfortable...but those hands rubbing the stiffness out of his shoulders and back felt divine.

"Mmm...s'nice..." he mumbled, a tiny smile twitching his lips.

"Wake up, my dear hanyou...you surely don't wish to sleep the whole night on the dungeon floor...you're so tense already..."

The words hit Inuyasha like a lightning bolt and his eyes snapped open without preamble. He let out a sharp yell as all of his senses confirmed who it was touching him.

"AACCCK!! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME, NARAKU!!!" Inuyasha scrambled backwards so fast he nearly duplicated Sesshoumaru's earlier crack-skull-on-wall trick.

Naraku gave Inuyasha a smirk. Oh, how he LOVED to torment the hanyou by....doing the absolute opposite of tormenting the hanyou. Naraku rolled his eyes at Inuyasha's typical overreaction. "Oh, calm down. I didn't assume you would wish to spend the entire night on the floor."

"What the hell are you doing down here?! When did you even get back?! What the FUCK, man?!"

"I was the one that found your brother in the first place. Hmph. Some gratitude. I was just coming to check up on him. He looks much nicer cleaned up."

Inuyasha growled and cursed the fact that he left his Tetsusaiga in his room. "Get your damn pervy eyes off my brother."

Naraku arched an eyebrow as he looked at Sesshoumaru. "Easier said than done when he's putting on such a show."

"Wha?..." Inuyasha blinked and his gaze flew over to Sesshoumaru. His jaw dropped as he realized the taiyoukai was bathed in sweat and writhing in silent ecstasy, lost deep in some dream...or perhaps a facet of his deranged mind, it was impossible to tell if he was awake or not.

Once Inuyasha got his mental feet back under him, however, he growled and swatted at Naraku. "Stop staring, you fucking hentai...damn it...get out of here..." Before Naraku could protest...or keep staring, Inuyasha really didn't like the way those crimson eyes were riveted on Sesshoumaru...Inuyasha snagged him by the sleeve and hauled him bodily out of the dungeon, his face roughly as red as his haori and grumbling to himself.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Vhen ve hit da zhore, ve have to move fast, due north."

Toga nodded and slid into his true form, and Sairex gave the boat a final burst of propulsion before leaping up on his doggy mount.

When they were close enough, Toga leapt free of the boat and tore down the dock, blowing past a stunned demon and several motionless souls. A few messenger imps blinked wide-eyed as the massive white dog blew through their ranks without slowing.

Sairex couldn't help a grin. It was surely a guilty pleasure, riding on Toga's back, although he surely wasn't about to call attention to that fact. Toga was such a graceful, powerful beast, and the raven had always been fascinated by the smooth ripple of muscle under that sleek, furry hide. Besides...it was for the best, really. While Sairex could fly faster than Toga could run, the inu never seemed to tire and could lope along seemingly endlessly.

The raven closed his eyes, silently urging his friend to travel faster. They shouldn't have stopped in the river as they had - he could feel something powerful approaching rapidly in the distance. // Well, no matter. We should make it back in time...and as long as I can survive the jump back, I...well... // "Toga?"

"Mm?"

"Vhen ve get back...I know a vay to keep you alive."

Toga frowned, not liking the extreme hesitance and reluctance in the raven's tone. "The way you say it makes me think there is some sort of catch."

"Well...I'm no healer, you know. But....I don't...tink any amount of bandaging vould be enough to zave you. Gods, Toga, you veren't just zpilling blood you know."

"Well, I tried to hold everything in. Heh. What's the problem?"

"One of....da tings I learned from my people vere vays to..." Sairex winced and tightened his grip on Toga's fur, his voice a whisper. "...vays to prolong da torture of captives dat vould hold off death. But...if I do dat, you von't be able to zleep for...gods, I don't know...it vill keep you conscious and in pain until you can heal."

"Hn, I can take a little pain. Its a small price to pay to be alive again. Just cast your spell, set what healers we have on me, and I should be better in a few days. Why didn't you mention this earlier?"

"Toga...you tink I vant to TORTURE you? I vas trying to tink of another vay."

"Oh, I see. Is this because I kissed you, that you decided to torture me?"

Sairex gave him a horrified look. "Vhat? No! I didn't try to ztop you because I DIDN'T like it, it vas...damn you, inu, don't tease me like dis. It's mean."

"You're always so calm and collected and smart. I can't help that I enjoy ruffling your feathers a bit. Either way, relax. I can handle a bit of pain and I'll heal fairly quickly. Don't worry so much."

"Kaa...it's more dan a 'little bit of pain' Toga."

"Pfft. No worries. I'll endure it. You know...all this talk of pain and dying aside...it has been rather fun running around with you causing trouble."

Sairex snorted. "Right. Zairex an' Toga, taking on da Circle and den da Undervorld. Vhat's next?"

"Heaven sounds nice, it's about the only place we haven't hit up yet."

"Vhy not? Mm, if you vould be zo kind as to ztop right over dere...."

Toga slowed down and stopped in the designated area and Sairex hopped off his back, pausing to scratch him between the ears.

"Zuch a zveet little doggy...ACK!" Sairex stumbled backwards as Toga lunged forward and gave him a very wet lick across the face. "I take it back. You're a damn animal, didn't anyone ever teach you not to jump up? Kaa..."

Toga sat back on his haunches, a big doggy grin on his face and tail wagging. "I was never very good at following orders."

"Vell, I'm going to give you a couple now. Zit. Ztay. I'll bring you over as zoon as I make zure everyting is in place zo I don't have to kill myzelf again to get you back, alright? If you behave, maybe I'll even give you a treat."

Toga appeared to consider it before laying down and resting his head on his front paws, tail thumping slowly. "Yes, yes, I'll be good. Make it fast."

Sairex closed his eyes and offered a silent prayer that his spell worked as well as he had let on it would. For one heart-stopping, soul-freezing moment he was afraid that it hadn't worked...and then everything went black.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku couldn't help but let out a startled cry when Sairex sat up suddenly, hauling in a deep breath, yellow eyes wide and hand coming up to clutch at his heart.

"Sairex! You...you're alive!" Miroku looked about ready to pounce on him, but held off as he took a good look at Sairex's expression.

The raven wheezed and held up his other hand, trying hard to cope with the sudden horrible ache in his chest. For one terrible moment he feared that he was going to slide back into the dark chasm of death that loomed directly behind him, threatening to swallow him and whispering how it could caress away this pain...

"Damn...living vith a vound like dis is a lot more painful dan dying vith it..." Sairex gave Miroku a faint grin.

"Dear Buddha...you worried me so much."

Sairex sighed softly and, when he discovered he was at least healed enough to move without breaking, slid over to give Miroku a hug. "Believe me vhen I zay I vould have done da zame for you vithout a zecond thought."

Miroku sighed and tightened his arms around the raven, burying his face in his mate's hair. "I know...it just...it broke my heart to come around the corner and find you like that...can you at least warn me before you kill yourself next time?"

Sairex smiled weakly. "Heh. I'll actually be attempting to avoid da zuicide ting."

"That's good to hear. So...did it work?...whatever you had to do?..."

"I have to finish up." Reluctantly, Sairex pulled out of Miroku's embrace, alarmed at how exhausted his body suddenly felt. But no...he could not succumb to this weariness, not yet. He had to finish it, save Toga too else the whole thing was in vain. The raven cringed as he whispered dark words in his native tongue over Toga's still form. Sairex looked away as he slowly wiped away the rune he had drawn on Toga's forehead before he had cast the initial spell and followed him into death.

Miroku was suddenly horribly curious as to Sairex's dark expression and the pain he saw in his lover's eyes. His attention was stolen, however, when Toga's eyes snapped open wide. The inu sucked in a sharp breath and let it out in an anguished howl, curling in on himself and moving to wrap his arms around his stomach, shaking and struggling to breathe.

"Now...It's done..." Sairex mumbled softly before he slid slowly, gracefully into unconsciousness.

Miroku caught Sairex before he could hit the ground, looking at Toga in alarm. "Lord Toga?...A...Are you alright?"

Toga let out a thin whine in response, clawing at the floor ineffectively. Sairex had said it would hurt and he would be fully conscious of his pain...but he had NEVER expected it to be this bad. // Huh...guess dying DOES numb things a lot more than I thought...ah, FUCK...//

Miroku sighed inwardly and scooped Sairex up. "I'll...be right back to take care of you, Toga, I promise...I can only handle one of you at a time." The monk hurried off to put his lover to bed and then find someone to help him with the anguished inu.


	112. Chapter 111

Pride (In the Name of Love) 111 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So a guy walks into a bar and asks the bartender..."Hey, do you have any helicopter chips?"

And the bartender responds, "Sorry, all we have is plain."

Plain...PLANE...XD

Trust me when I say its funnier after you've been up all night. Courtesy of my friend Chris.

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Morning came, and the sun slowly peeked over the horizon.

The breath was blasted out of Sairex's lungs in a startled wheeze as something landed on him out of nowhere. Yellow eyes shot open to regard his attacker.

His daughter Aliana was beaming at him and Miroku and trying hard not to bounce.

Sairex let out a low groan and rubbed at his eyes. He noted that the shock and the impact hadn't produced more than a slight twinge of pain in his chest. // At least I'm mostly healed...// "Nn...Ali, vhat do you vant?"

"Father, it's MORNING!"

Miroku mumbled and pulled a pillow over his head.

"Wake UP!" Ali insisted, bouncing slightly before leaping off and trying to haul the blanket with her.

"Ack!" Sairex snagged the covers and squinted at her. "Kanas kita..." he muttered before nudging Miroku. "Vake up."

Miroku slowly blinked bleary violet eyes at the girl, brushing a few rogue strands of hair from his face as he sat up. Ali giggled as they fell right back in place. "Ali...why are you waking us up so early?...we had a rather rough night..."

"Auntie Kagome said you had to get up NOW and come with her." Here the girl paused. "Well, actually, she said just you, Daddy. She needs you to help her and Uncle 'Yasha get some magic stuff to make Father and Uncle Toga feel better. She says YOU need to sleep." Aliana nodded very seriously at Sairex before pushing him back on his back and tucking the covers up under his chin.

Miroku bit back a smirk.

Sairex closed his eyes with a sigh and allowed himself to be tucked back in. "Vell, den, maybe you zhould have jumped on HIM first den. I VAS zleeping."

Ali blinked. "Well...I was going to, but I wanted to say good morning to both of you! Daddy, are you getting up? Come ON!"

"Yes, yes...go...see your Aunt Kagome and get some breakfast or something so I can get dressed and ready to go, alright?"

"Ok!" Ali chirped happily, before giving Sairex a quick kiss on the cheek and then bouncing out of the room.

Miroku glanced at Sairex, amusement dancing across his features despite the events of the previous night. "The joys of parenthood?"

"Kaa...zhe does dat much more and zhe vill be a parent down. My poor heart can't take it. Ezpecially right now."

Miroku frowned, concern overriding his amusement. "You alright, love?"

"Eh. I'm ok. It's more or less healed. I zhould be fine before tomorrow."

"Mm...what about...." Miroku trailed off, noting the wince on Sairex's face.

"Toga vill heal more zlowly dan he normally vould and vill not be able to zleep or lose consciousness at all for at least a tenday, maybe more. Even if it's to zave his life, I've done a terrible ting to my friend. A very terrible ting."

"But as you said, its to save his life. Short of Kagome we don't have anyone that can do any healing at all...and she surely cant use holy magics on a demon."

"I zincerely hope zhe has zometing dat vill numb him or help in zome vay. Vas...it very bad?"

Miroku finally finished working his way into his robes and then began raking a brush through his hair. "I'm sure she will."

"I'll take dat as a yes, it vas."

"I felt terribly for him but there was nothing I could do. I tried some herbs but they didn't seem to have any effect."

Sairex sat up abruptly. "He kissed me."

Miroku blinked, pausing in mid-brush. "Eh?"

"Vhen ve vere dead. He's...kaa...dis whole ting vith Zezzhoumaru is affecting him a lot more dan he vants to let on, and he's hurt and lonely and confused. It's going to become zometing of an issue. I vant you to know dat I love you and vill never do anyting to hurt you, but dis vill need dealing vith at zome point."

"Oh, I know. And I know how hard this has to have been on both of you. Really, I'm surprised it hasn't come up before now."

Sairex squinted. "You zound like you expected dis."

"Yes. Really, Sairex..." Miroku turned to face his lover and set the brush down, smiling. "Don't let it eat at you. You two never had any closure, never were able to deal with things. No matter what the resolution ends up being, you can't just leave things up in the air or swept under a rug and expect it to go away. Neither of you will have any peace. I know you love me, and nothing he does will change that. I can accept if you still have feelings for Toga, and I'll deal with whatever happens because of it. All I ask is that you remain honest with me and don't try to hide anything."

Sairex's lips twitched into a half-grin. "Heh. Vant to go zhack up vith a dog vhen he gets better? Betveen da two of us he von't know vhat hit him."

Miroku smirked lasciviously. "Mm...that has it's possibilities..."

Sairex's eyes popped wide. "I vasn't zerious!"

Miroku smiled and patted him on the shoulder. "Maybe I wasn't either." The monk smiled innocently and pulled his hair back into a tail. "Maybe."

Sairex couldn't do anything but stare as Miroku began whistling and sauntered out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"So...not that I mind helping out, but why do you need me to come with you?" Miroku arched an eyebrow at Kagome.

"Well...you're the one that tended to Toga's injuries so you have the best grasp on how serious things are."

"He should be dead."

Kagome frowned. "That bad, huh?"

"Worse. Sairex said he will remain fully conscious and won't be able to sleep for a good ten days or so. Maybe more."

"That's horrible...even if we numb him?"

"I'm sure he'd rather be numb and awake than in pain and awake."

"That's true. Well, I suppose we better get going, then." Kagome said with a slight smile.

"Where are we going?"

Miroku's spine stiffened and Inuyasha flinched visibly at the sound of Naraku's voice. The hanyou turned to squint at the kumo with a growl. "YOU aren't going anywhere!"

Naraku sighed heavily. "Fine...I'm not much for travelling anyways." The kumo's expression brightened. "I'll go chat with Sesshoumaru until you come back."

Inuyasha was across the room in a split second, his hands fisting in Naraku's haori and pulling the kumo closer, growling dangerously. "You stay the fuck away from my brother."

"Jealous, are we? You didn't want me to come with you, so I assumed I would go to someone that wouldn't scorn my company...but..."

Inuyasha snarled and jerked back as Naraku tweaked his ears. "Keep your damn hands off of me! Why the HELL do you torment me all the time?!"

Naraku stared at Inuyasha. "Torment? I have done nothing to torment you. I've been nothing but friendly and nice to you."

Inuyasha growled. "Just leave me alone...and my brother too. He's fucked up enough without you adding to it."

"He talks to me, at least. We had some interesting conversations before the bird found us in that Circle place."

Miroku stared incredulously at Naraku. "Sesshoumaru spoke to you? Actually to you and not...just to himself? An actual conversation?"

Naraku nodded. "Well, yes, although he has some damned strange ideas in that pretty silver head of his. From what I've gathered, this is ultimately all a plan concocted by his mother to get revenge for something or other. His mother is the moon, by the way. Or the moon is part of her. And she spies on him and sends illusions and ghosts to torment him. And nothing that happens out here matters anyways, because eventually he'll wake up as the dragon's captive again."

Inuyasha frowned. "He....he actually said all those things to you?"

"Yes."

"Why the fuck is my brother chatty with you?"

Miroku frowned. "Possibly because...Naraku would not have been amongst the illusions used to torment him, considering their history. Therefore Sesshoumaru...would not doubt that Naraku was real."

Naraku nodded. "I actually just want to help. I'm sorry if that's so difficult for you to accept. I'm growing rather weary of being treated so dismally when I've done nothing to warrant it." Before Inuyasha could spit out a retort, the kumo slid out of the room.

Miroku sighed heavily and shook his head. "Lets...just get going, Inuyasha. If Naraku really wanted to hurt Sesshoumaru, he had ample opportunity to do so and didn't make a move to take it."

"Ugh. Why can't he just...I don't know, die or something?"

Kagome snorted. "He's Naraku. He doesn't die. But Miroku was right, we should hurry. The longer we wait, the worse things get for your father."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru groaned, his back arching as imagined fingertips trailed down his chest, then over his stomach...as deliciously sharp teeth nibbled at his throat, tauntingly close to the thick vein in his neck that they could so easily rip open in one powerful bite...but they never would. Powerful hands seemed to be everywhere on him as he was caressed, loved...and utterly dominated and claimed. So owned, even though he was Lord Sesshoumaru, and he bowed to no other of his own free will. He never would.

But oh, it was so right. He belonged body, heart and soul to his Lord Father, after all. He would follow him with unfailing devotion to the ends of the earth. He was an extension of his will, his weapon, his slave, his successor, his advisor, his lover, his whore...oh, he would be anything for this godly male without a thought of ever questioning him. Belonging to him was the culmination of his existence. It was what he was born for, after all...to be His Sesshoumaru. Yes...

// Oh, gods, yes...let me be anything for you, my Lord Father, let me show my devotion...just let me be yours, let me stay with you always. I do not care if it is nothing but a dream, I do not wish to wake. Please...I am nothing without you, a broken-winged bird, all my heart in shadow...//

But the dream was already fading...he could feel the oppressive presence of HER, pulling him towards consciousness, hating him for even these twisted illusions, hating him for his unflawed love.

And oh, it made her so jealous. She hated him...wanted to destroy him if only to take him from his Lord Father...

Sesshoumaru's eyes snapped open as a cold sweat broke out on his skin. Ghostly figures retreated from him, things barely glimpsed out of the corners of his eyes retreated before he could get a good look at them...but they were merely biding their time. He could feel them, watching him. Slowly, the inuyoukai drew his legs up tightly against his chest and hugged them there. Gods, he was so cold...

Sesshoumaru stiffened as a mild voice intruded in his private little world. "Ah...you're awake."

Slowly the inuyoukai sat up and turned to regard Naraku.


	113. Chapter 112

Pride (In the Name of Love) 112 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - A duck walks into a bar. Asks the bartender, "Got any quackers?"

Bartender replies, "No, sorry." The duck leaves.

Next day, duck walks into the bar. "Got any quackers?"

Bartender replies, "No." Duck leaves.

Next day, duck walks into the bar. "Got any quackers?"

Bartender is getting a little irate. "No." Duck leaves.

Next day, duck walks into the bar. "Got any quackers?"  
The bartender says, "No, dammit, and if you don't stop coming in here and asking me that every day I'll nail your ass to that sign over there!" Duck leaves.

Next day, duck walks into the bar. Bartender glares. Duck asks, "Got any nails?"

Puzzled, the bartender replies, "No..."

Duck grins. "Got any quackers?"

I really need to come up with some more cunning things to say....XD Another fine joke, courtesy of Chris. I heard SO many "XX walks into a bar..." jokes the past few nights....SO many....

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Tsetsukosei growled low in his throat. "You ask me for much, considering that it was I that came to YOU for our mutual benefit in the first place."

His companion scowled darkly. "I wasn't planning on acting or involving myself in any way. It is only right that you compensate me for my personal risk."

The dracolich rumbled low in his throat before muttering a few dark words. A small blood-red orb appeared in his claws. His associate smirked.

"See? I knew you would see things my way."

"Hn...you seem to think this a small matter. You do not know how long it took me to work this spell or what it cost me. However...your continued assistance is to my benefit." The dracolich slowly extended his claws and dropped the orb into an eagerly waiting hand.

"I do not understand why you used such mundane methods as chains and bars to contain Sesshoumaru if you can enact a spell of imprisonment such as this."

Tsetsukosei snorted. "Fool. If I ensnared the pup in a concealment such as that, I could not interact with him or torment him in any way. This is purely for containment. You can do nothing but speak with those bound. I desired far more than that...but I underestimated how profound his lunacy would be."

"So all I have to do is speak the command word and the name within range, and the spell activates?"

"Yes. Still, I think you are underestimating your opponents."

"Am I? With this to hold over them and my own power, the West will have no choice but surrender to me...and with Toga's sons under my rule, no matter how reluctantly, no one can challenge me. And once all is secure, we will discuss the matter of Sesshoumaru."

Tsetsukosei growled dangerously. "There is to be no discussion. You may use him for your purposes, then he is MINE to do with as I please."

"I have no issue with you doing as you please, but I wish to maximize the damage. My reasons for doing this are multifold, as you well know. I want them to SEE what you are doing to that wretched pup. I want his pain to be legend...for my own ends."

Tsetsukosei smiled slowly. "You are cruel...very well. We will have this discussion at a later time. I shall await your contact to tell me when it is done and the binding is complete."

"You can be sure I will let you know as soon as possible. Now away with you, beast..." Glittering eyes shone with malicious delight as they eyed the spelled orb. "I have much to do."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru eyed Naraku warily and slowly sat up. The kumo did not waver, vanish, or make any sudden moves - rather to the crazed youkai's surprise.

Naraku pulled up a chair and sat down, sipping idly at a cup of tea. As an afterthought, he offered one to Sesshoumaru. "Would you like some? One of the cooks mentioned you favored it."

Sesshoumaru frowned, his mind raising a thousand questions at once and arguing - rather loudly - as to the impossibility of it all. Tsetsukosei would not know about something like this....would he? And how could that beast know exactly what the dungeon in his own castle looked like? And why would he create the kumo, of all things, to speak with him? How could he know about the tea?

Hesitantly, the taiyoukai slid forward and accepted the proffered cup, sniffing at it. Yes, it was...exactly how it should be.

Naraku watched Sesshoumaru for a while before speaking. "I've invited a couple people to come speak with you. It should be terribly interesting. Provided they arrive and all this happens before your brother kills me. He doesn't want me anywhere near you."

"This must be some sort of trick. We do not believe you..."

"Don't you? Why in the name of all that's holy would your mother use ME to trick you? She didn't even know me, possibly didn't even know OF me. That isn't to say I know much about me, really...but I don't think I ever crossed paths with her."

"Hn....she is devious."

"Why is it you believe this is all your mother's plan, anyways?"

Sesshoumaru stared at Naraku. "We saw her...and we knew her. She is always watching us. We cannot escape her eye, we are branded by her. She hates us because we are."

Naraku nodded. "I see...and how do you know it is your mother? You never met her, as far as I have learned."

"We have seen her and we know her. It does not matter that we have never seen her." Sesshoumaru hissed angrily, clenching his teacup so tightly that it shattered. He didn't seem to feel the jagged spears of china splitting his hand.

"Ah...of course. Tell me...what is it you know of the raven demon, Sairex?"

Sesshoumaru recoiled sharply, eyes widening as he regarded Naraku. "Wh-what? How can you know of...but..."

"The raven, Sairex, is quite real, I assure you. In fact, he'll be coming in any moment to speak with you."

"Lies..." Sesshoumaru hissed, recoiling into the back of his cell, wishing his hair was long enough to grab to help soothe his agitation.

"Vell, I've been called many tings, but never had my existence passed off as a lie." Sairex smiled slightly as he slid into the room.

"Ah. Right on time." Naraku nodded.

Sesshoumaru stared at the raven wide-eyed before shaking his head in denial. "N-no..."

"Oh, believe me, I'm real enough."

"Prove it..." Sesshoumaru growled, a look of mad triumph in his eyes.

Sairex paused, thinking hard. "Mm. Vhat if I told you zometing dat no one else could know, but you vould know to be true?"

Sesshoumaru eyed Sairex warily before nodding slowly.

Sairex paused, tapping his chin thoughtfully with one finger. "Your father is ticklish."

Sesshoumaru blinked several times in sheer disbelief and then growled. "Do not mock my Lord Father's memory."

"Mock him? Kaa, I vouldn't mock Toga. And I assure you, he's very much alive, not a memory. All you've zuffered...it vas not a dream, Zezzhoumaru. Your brother rescued you. Miroku and I vere able to revive your father after da monk accidently pulled his zpirit from da nethervorld."

"...Tell me something else."

Sairex thought for a moment before beckoning to Sesshoumaru and leaning over to whisper in his ear. Naraku watched, curious, and his curiosity only grew when he saw Sesshoumaru's cheeks suddenly flame bright red and the taiyoukai recoiled sharply.

"How could you know THAT?!"

Sairex blushed a bit himself. "Your father and I vere lovers a long time ago. Zome tings...ztick vith you, no matter da passage of time."

Sesshoumaru made a curious noise that was caught somewhere between a growl and a moan and shook his head hard, backing up until he hit the wall. He crouched down into one corner and stayed there for a long moment before ever so slowly looking over, his voice a trembling whisper.

"Sairex...?"

"Yes, Lord Zezzhoumaru."

"It...it was not...a dream? This place..you...Rin...my brother, my...my Lord Father?..."

"It is as you zay. No dream." Sairex couldn't help but smile as Sesshoumaru slowly met his gaze. Sesshoumaru's eyes were slowly filling with tears, and his pain and sadness were horribly visible in their golden depths...but his gaze was conscious, coherent, and lucid.

"I...I am...I am home? The..." Sesshoumaru slowly raised his hand to his throat, wincing as he felt the very evident bite-scar from Tsetsukosei.

"Ve vill remove it again. I do not know by vhat method Toga's mark vas removed, but I'm zure he'll be happy enough to recreate it vhen he's recovered."

"Recovered?"

"He zuffered a rather zevere injury, but he vill recover in time."

"I am home...I am free....and my Lord Father lives." Sesshoumaru's voice was quavering and soft, and it sounded like he scarcely dared to believe the truth of his words, as if he were trying to convince himself.

"Yes."

Naraku nodded to himself and slid out of the dungeons. His work here was done. Just one more thing for him to wave in Inuyasha's face later... The thought brought a wide grin to the kumo's face.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

After a lengthy discussion, it was decided - albeit reluctantly - that there wasn't much they could do for Toga's injury, nor was it really necessary. Since he could not die from the wound, his demonic healing would take over and fix him up better than any simple stitch-job or bandages could.

All they really could do was find some stout painkillers.

"Well, the problem with that..." Kagome frowned. "Most of the painkillers that would come anywhere close to helping out with the level of pain he's dealing with are illegal."

Inuyasha scowled. "Then I'll just have to steal them."

Kagome stared. "Inuyasha, I really don't care to go to prison for the rest of my life."

"Keh. I won't get caught and you won't come with me. You know I can run circles around any human. I just need to know what I'm looking for."

A little Internet research and a few pictures later, and Kagome reluctantly pointed Inuyasha in the direction of one of the bigger pharmacies in town.

The hanyou was in and out of the building so fast that the startled pharmacists and technicians hardly knew what happened. Later, police were further baffled as they tried to follow the thief...but all reports had said that the man had made an impossible leap to the rooftop...and then moved so fast that he had simply vanished from sight.

Inuyasha returned to the shrine with two bulging sacks containing all the narcotics he had been able to get his claws on in his mad snatch-and-run. He hadn't been able to determine what in the pharmacy's locked cage he had needed at a glance...so he had simply torn the door off and stuffed as much as he could fit into the large sacks he had brought with him.

Soon the trio were on their way back to the feudal era, Kagome busily flipping through a nurse's drug handbook and mentally cataloging their haul as she rode on Inuyasha's back.


	114. Chapter 113

Pride (In the Name of Love) 113 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - The edit is done! I have officially gone back and changed and reuploaded every single chapter of this beast, plus my sidestories. I gave each chapter a fancy new header with updated warnings and whatnot, added a line or two as I went to clarify some slightly sticky parts...occasionally changed a word or two for one that fit better...changed a lot of Sairex's old parts to fit how things SHOULD be (considering his original storyline in here didn't match the one I gave him when he became a major character). Ultimately, though, there are no major content changes and I fixed as much as I could. The other big thing was changing all instances of Toga's name, considering I changed from calling him simply Taisho to Toga after like 30 chapters. _

So if anyone finds anything that needs editing...let me know, because I've missed it. =D

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Once the trio returned to the Western Castle, Kagome took the time to sort out the bags of drugs they had acquired. Inuyasha had managed to grab several sorts of morphine derivatives, which Kagome put in a special pile. There were several medications that were entirely unrelated to anything they needed, due to the nature of Inuyasha's random heist, but Kagome figured they had enough to help out some.

Miroku frowned uneasily when Kagome gathered up some vials and a few needles, as well as her book to guide her in dosing. "Kagome, perhaps you should let me..."

"Nonsense. I'm quite capable of sticking a demon with a needle."

Miroku sighed. "Yes, but...well...it's bad. I don't think you really need to see it."

"Sesshoumaru was blasted halfway to bits from the Wind Scar and I saw him."

"He was unconscious."

"All the more reason for us to hurry. Now move it, monk."

Inuyasha was on Kagome's side, even if he really wasn't sure he wanted to see his father in such a state. As it turned out, he regretted not following his initial instinct. The moment he entered the room his ears slicked back and he whined.

Toga was curled into a ball and clutching himself tightly, although it was obvious from the clawed and shredded bedding around him that he had definitely had his moments of thrashing and writhing. His eyes were wide and rolling, almost as crazed as Sesshoumaru's had been. A thin thread of blood had worked it's way from the corner of his mouth and a low, raspy noise that might have been a whine at one point rattled in a throat long since worn raw from screaming. Toga was drenched in sweat and quivering, and the sight of such extreme physical anguish brought tears to the miko's eyes before she remembered that she was here to try and fix exactly that.

Kagome hurried over before Inuyasha could stop her. The hanyou was afraid that Toga's mind was gone as a result of his condition, but was surprised to see him actually focus on Kagome when she spoke to him. "Lord Toga...I've brought some things from my world to help with your pain. We were able to help Sesshoumaru when he was hurt and I think I can at least help your pain. But I have to stick this needle in your arm, alright?"

Toga didn't manage to speak but did push his arm out towards her. The veins were visible due to the extreme strain in his muscles, and he never even felt the prick of the needle.

Kagome started him on the highest dose of morphine that the drug handbook had stated was considered safe for a human. She had no doubt that his demon system could handle more, but there was no sense in starting higher than was necessary.

As it turned out, it was pretty much exactly what was necessary. While Toga's body could surely have handled a much higher dosage, his body had never experienced much in the way of painkillers and had built up no tolerances. Slowly the tension faded from his muscles and he uncurled, his breathing calming. His eyes were rather glazed and it was clear that his coherency had probably been vaporized under the effect of the narcotic...but at least his pain had went with it.

Inuyasha breathed a sigh of relief that turned into a yelp of shock as the door burst open behind him and a rather excited Sairex almost collided with him. "Ack!"

Sairex eeped and only managed to stop the collision by shooting out his wings to either side. A few rapid flaps provided enough reverse momentum that he was able to halt and keep his balance.

Miroku blinked. "Sairex, what's the rush?"

Sairex looked about to answer before he took a good look at Toga. "Vhat did you do to him?"

Kagome smiled slightly. "Medicine from my time. He's pretty well out of it now...but he's not feeling any pain, at least."

Sairex nodded. "Vell, dat's zometing of a zhame...but probably for da best. He needs to rest and recover as much as possible."

"What's going on, bird?" Inuyasha asked with a squint.

"Your brother!" Sairex grinned, excited. "He's come to, more or less. He's lucid."

Inuyasha was out of the room almost before Sairex finished speaking.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha hurried into the dungeons and stared at his brother for a long moment without saying anything. Sesshoumaru was sitting in a chair and very slowly sipping at a cup of tea. He had flinched when Inuyasha entered. "Sessh...?"

Sesshoumaru's eyes slowly turned to Inuyasha and he set down his cup. "Yes. I apologize for...anything I may have done or said since I've been back. I...I do not recall..."

Inuyasha almost sobbed in relief. "Oh, shit, Sessh, don't worry about it...I'm just glad that you're alright. We were so worried...its been horrible since you've been gone."

Sesshoumaru just nodded, fingering his cup. Inuyasha frowned at how...fragile...his brother looked at that moment. While it was true that he was indeed coherent....his personality had changed. He seemed infinitely breakable, like a beaten puppy...nervous and shy and somewhat twitchy, not really making direct eye contact. "What...happened to my hair?"

Inuyasha smiled feebly. "I...had to cut it off. It'll be back just as crazy-long as ever in a couple days, you know how fast we heal. It was kinda an impossibly tangled mess. It's already grown back a few inches since my hack-job."

"Oh. Well...thank you."

"How about we get you out of this cell and to your own room?"

"I...alright. How....how is my Lord Father? I was told he sustained a severe injury."

Inuyasha offered him a faint smile. "He'll be better in a few days, but he's resting right now. Kagome brought some medicine from her time to help keep him relaxed so he heals faster."

"I...may I see him? I need...I need to see him. Even if he's resting. I do not intend to disturb him." The need to confirm that this was not, indeed, a trick burned in the back of Sesshoumaru's mind. While he was indeed conscious and aware, that hardly meant he had become a stable individual with the flip of a switch. Dark things still loomed in the corners of his mind and voices still whispered deep in his subconscious. It would be frightfully easy for Sesshoumaru to relapse back into insanity at a moment's notice.

Inuyasha blinked and then nodded, fishing the keys for the cell out of his sleeve and letting Sesshoumaru out. The taiyoukai drifted past him almost immediately. He made a beeline for Toga's room, the hanyou following him silently.

Kagome, Miroku, and Sairex had apparently left Toga to rest and were not present in the room when the brothers arrived. Sesshoumaru slowly approached the bed, eyes riveted on Toga. A thousand unnameable emotions flickered through Sesshoumaru's eyes. He stopped just shy of being able to touch his sire.

A long, silent and still moment passed before Sesshoumaru soundlessly fell to his knees, his eyes shutting against the heavy tears that came anyways, his head falling forward and his hands dangling limply in his lap. His Lord Father...he was here, he was real...even if this was a dream he had finally fallen inescapably into, it no longer mattered. His Lord Father was here and alive, and Sesshoumaru could remain with him.

If nothing else, that was enough for the taiyoukai.

Inuyasha didn't know whether he should leave them alone or get Sesshoumaru back to his own room, didn't know if he should dare to disturb his brother. Luckily, he didn't have to worry about it. After an indeterminable amount of time, Sesshoumaru shakily got to his feet and headed for the door.

"I will...be going to the bath. I need to clean up and dress properly."

"Of course, I'll let ya be to do your thing, I guess."

Sesshoumaru paused for the longest time. "Would...you care to accompany this Sesshoumaru? I... I feel as if I have been alone for a very, very long time and would welcome the company."

Inuyasha perked up instantly. "Yeah, sure. Let me get a change of clothes and stuff and I'll meet you there!"

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru sat on the edge of the bath and continued to unwrap the bandages on his arms with an expression that waffled between amusement and incredulity. Who in the seven hells had wrapped his injuries like this? The amount of bandaging clearly outstripped the wounds, and it wasn't very neatly done. A faint sniff confirmed his brother's scent, and a little trickle of affection drifted through Sesshoumaru. // Well. That explains it. Only he would assume I needed six leagues of bandaging for what was surely just a scratch. //

There WAS quite a bit of blood once he got to the inner layers of the bandages, however, and Sesshoumaru reformatted his opinion. // Well. Perhaps it was a bit more than a simple scratch. I wonder what the hell happened to me...? //

"Hey. How are your arms doing?"

Sesshoumaru jumped visibly at the sound, his head jerking around, unable to hide the blooming...but rapidly quelled...panic that spread across his features.

"Oops...I'm sorry, Sessh, I didn't mean to startle you...."

Sesshoumaru nodded and finished removing the bandages. "What happened to me to warrant this?" He gestured to the small mountain of discarded white strips.

Inuyasha frowned. "Heh...you...you wouldn't stop clawing your arms open. Not just little scratches, either...I mean you were really ripping them open."

Sesshoumaru frowned, and a terrifically alluring memory the color of deep crimson blossomed in his mind.

Inuyasha noted the drifting, increasingly vacant look on his brother's face with growing alarm. "Sessh?...Hey, Sesshoumaru!"

The taiyoukai jerked back to reality abruptly. He shook his head slightly and then stood, disrobing unceremoniously and sinking into the warm bathwater with an involuntary but contented sigh.

Crisis averted, Inuyasha decided to join him. The water DID feel terribly good, after all. He couldn't stop a slight blush and a grin as he recalled the last time he had actually ended up in this very bath with his brother.

"What is so amusing, Inuyasha?"

"Oh, nothin'. Just thinkin'."

Sesshoumaru was silent for a minute. "I suppose the concept of you thinking IS rather humorous."

Inuyasha blinked several times. Was...Was his brother actually TEASING him? "Well, aren't you the comedian? I was just thinkin' about the last time I ended up in the bath with you."

Sesshoumaru's mind helpfully supplied images of Inuyasha's hands roaming all over him and awakening sensations he had never thought possible and he felt the blush rising within him, saw the tiniest smug grin on his brother's face. // Hn...this Sesshoumaru is no blushing beta...nor am I some sentimental female. I will not ... not act like this! I am alpha and Inuyasha will NOT hold anything over ME! // His mental stiffening of his spine, however, did nothing to quell the redness of his cheeks.

Inuyasha jerked his head back in surprise when, with a sudden rush of water, Sesshoumaru was in his face and growling softly. "S...Sessh?"

"Shut up, hanyou." Sesshoumaru leaned in and kissed his brother with bruising force, nipping sharply at his lip and tasting blood. As abruptly as it began, however, the taiyoukai was suddenly back across the tub to his former position, his expression settling back towards meek and mild.

Inuyasha stared at him, eyes impossibly huge. Sesshoumaru ignored him and proceeded to start scrubbing himself up. Inuyasha had done a passable job at cleaning him, really, but he knew he could do better.

Inwardly, the taiyoukai entertained a small, private smirk. He had taken control of this situation and Inuyasha was now the one off-guard and flustered. In that tiny way, if nothing else, Sesshoumaru felt he had taken a step towards getting a handle on his own existence again...and for a while, at least, the gibbering in his mind was blissfully silent


	115. Chapter 114

Pride (In the Name of Love) 114 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Heh heh heh heh heh. That's all I'm going to say.

Sesshoumaru - *glances at Jessi* My Lord Father?

Toga - Yes, my Sesshoumaru?

Sesshoumaru - I have decided that there is no dishonor in running away. *grabs Toga and runs for the hills*

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A week passed slowly, and all the trauma slowly settled down.

Toga was healing well, but lack of sleep had driven him to hallucinations and waking dreams. However, his outbursts were far and few between due to the largely mind-melting effect the morphine was having on him.

Sesshoumaru spent a lot of his time sitting in his father's room. He never actually was within touching distance - for some reason, the taiyoukai seemed almost afraid to touch his sire - but he would sit and watch him quietly. When he wasn't watching over his Lord Father, Sesshoumaru would drift silently around the castle grounds. He did not bother with his typical elaborate outfit and instead simply wore an unadorned white kimono. He seemed almost like a ghost.

While he was mostly sane, Sesshoumaru was prone to relapses or long periods where he would not respond to any outside interference. He was extremely jumpy and nervous and tended to twitch on occasion. He often had to be coaxed into more public areas of the castle - Inuyasha was instrumental in that. Sesshoumaru was much more relaxed around Inuyasha and would even sometimes tease his brother. While it never lasted long, it was at least a step in the right direction. The relative peace and quiet in the castle helped calm the paranoid taiyoukai tremendously.

Rin had finally been allowed to see him, although it had been a bit rough on her to see her beloved Lord so...fragile and edgy. However, he was still Sesshoumaru...and in the end, that was all that mattered. Her sunny smile and genuine affection was enough to bring a quavering smile to Sesshoumaru's lips - after all, who could resist Rin? Sesshoumaru truly was shocked to see what an unbelievably gorgeous woman his little ward had grown into.

Her smile also did warm and fuzzy things to him that he didn't really know how to deal with immediately. He carefully shelved those sensations as needing future exploration, but...not right now. For now, he was just happy to be back with the people he cared for.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex grinned in triumph and began loading a great many things in a satchel. Miroku caught the look of almost mad exaltation gleaming in his mate's eyes and offered a nervous smile.

"What are YOU so excited about?"

"Oh, I've finally figured out dis time zpell, I tink."

Miroku blinked. "Really? After all these years?"

"I tink I found vhere da problem vas. But I need more room dan vhat I have in here to zet up all da focal points and tings I need for dis ritual. Ve are going out to da garden. It vill take me da better part of the day, but I tink I can do dis."

Miroku smiled. "Well, good."

"I can't have any interruptions...vould you take Ali to Kagome and ask if zhe vill vatch over her and den meet me out dere?"

"Of course. This should be interesting, at the least." Miroku smiled and headed off to bring his daughter to Kagome.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku blinked when he saw Sairex's preparations. The raven was painstakingly tracing runes and symbols inside the edge of a massive circle he had drawn. Every rune he traced glowed a faint purple. The circle contained another circle within it, and a large pentagram within that.

The circle took a long time for the raven to perfect, and he paced around the edges and redrew several symbols before he was satisfied. That done, he began setting up candles and crystals in various patterns around the edge. Miroku watched in fascination.

"How did you ever figure this out?" the monk asked when the raven paused for a breather.

"Eh? Dis isn't part of da zpell. It's just a...focal ting. It vill help me channel properly and increase da power of my actual zpell."

"Oh. It looks very impressive."

"Tank you. I've alvays been good at dis zort of ting. I am going to ztart da zpell itzelf in a minute...hopefully it vorks. If not, it's back to da books."

"How will you know if it works?"

"Vell, I von't be able to zee anyting in your future anymore if you aren't part of time."

"Oh. Well, I suppose that makes sense."

"Have a zeat, get comfortable. I have a rather lengthy chant I'll have to do. It vill take a vhile." Sairex smiled and set a cushion in the middle of his circle and then sat down lotus-style on it.

Miroku settled down on a nearby bench, interested in watching his lover work. Sairex took several deep breaths and then pulled out the amulet he had worked on crafting, setting it in front of him. The raven then steepled his fingers and closed his eyes before beginning a quiet chant in his native tongue.

The chant was rhythmic and soothing. Miroku watched as the minutes became hours. One by one, the crystals around the edge of the circle began to glow with an inner light. Sairex made no movements at all, merely continued the quiet string of words.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Damn it, ya mangy wolf, get back here!"

"Not on your life, mutt!" Kouga crowed and darted down the hallway. The two of them had been in a rather heated scuffle over the last piece of a rather deliciously prepared boar tenderloin. Kouga had managed to snatch it and took off before Inuyasha could retaliate, and their wrestling had turned into an all-out chase throughout the castle grounds.

Kouga leapt out an open doorway into the courtyard, the hanyou hot on his heels. Really, they both knew how this would end. This sort of thing always had a predictable conclusion. Eventually, something would happen that allowed Inuyasha to catch the faster wolf. Whatever their scuffle had been about would be briefly scrabbled over and almost always forgotten as their wrestling turned intimate and became a wild round of animalistic passions.

The wolf tore across the courtyard, ducking into one of the gardens. Inuyasha was right on his heels, he noted. He returned his gaze in front of him and let out a startled curse, his arms shooting out to either side and pinwheeling as he struggled to stop his forward momentum to avoid running full into the middle of a brightly glowing purple circle he suddenly came upon.

Everything seemed to be moving in slow motion. Miroku's eyes flew wide and he leapt to his feet as he saw Kouga come flying in. He saw the wolf demon skid to a stop, barely avoiding Sairex's circle. Sairex's eyes snapped open. However, the wolf's almost-successful attempt to stop was rendered moot as Inuyasha slammed into the back of him, launching Kouga forward. Kouga, in turn, crashed fully into Sairex and sent them both tumbling backwards. Sairex's chant was broken off into a startled yelp as he was bowled over. "Ack! Kouga!"

All hell broke loose.

Sairex's eyes flew wide and he clamped his hand over his mouth in horror, but it was far too late. There was a blinding flash and a deafening explosion as all the crystals around the edges of the circle exploded, sending razor sharp shards in all directions. The runes in the circle flared into violent flashes of blue-violet light, and Kouga let out a startled yell that was cut short.

Inuyasha drug himself to his feet and shook his head hard, trying to get the ringing out of his ears. Miroku and Sairex were doing the same.

Sairex was the first one to wave away the dust and smoke that the explosion had caused enough to see what had happened. The raven fell backwards unceremoniously, eyes huge. "Kanann kahbahlla, vhat have I done?"

Miroku and Inuyasha finally managed to see what the stunned raven was looking at.

Kouga was sitting in the middle of the circle and blinking slowly, not seeming to fully comprehend what was going on around him and looking around with wide eyes. Confused and not liking all the smoke, the wolf demon burst into tears.

Inuyasha gaped for a long moment before turning to Sairex. "You...you made him into a little kid!"

It was true. Inuyasha could only gape in stunned disbelief as the suddenly tiny wolf toddled over to him and held up his arms, pleading silently around his tears to be picked up. The hanyou bent over automatically and picked Kouga up, rubbing his back and trying to get the little wolf to calm down.

Sairex shook his head with a soft moan. "Dear gods, vhat...how could I make zuch a ztupid mistake?"

Miroku stared, flabbergasted. "But...I thought I was supposed to be the target..."

Sairex scowled. "You vere...right up until I zaid his name instead and my zpell got cut off before it vas finished. I've never...I'm not zome fledgling vizard, I can't believe I'd botch dis zo badly! Losing concentration is one of da vorst tings to do vhen messing vith powerful magic...and letting da zpell go awry is even vorse."

Inuyasha stared at Kouga. The wolf, now feeling better, was playfully chewing on a thick lock of Inuyasha's hair. "Can you...can you fix him? Or am I stuck with my mate like this until he grows up again?"

Sairex rubbed his temples. "I...don't know. I'll do vhat I can. I'm drained right now." The raven slowly scooped up the enchanted amulet and frowned darkly. "Zo not only do I not know if da real zpell vorks, I have to figure out another problem. Lovely."

Inuyasha sighed and extricated his hair from the wolf's mouth. "Keh...well...worst case scenario, he'll grow up again eventually...it could be worse."

Miroku smiled feebly. "Heh, he's right, Sairex...I think..."

The raven nodded and headed back towards the castle, not bothering to answer and still kicking himself for making such a, in his mind, rookie mistake. // It isn't that simple. I don't know what I've done to him. Have I simply de-aged his body or have I sent him back in time? If he's still the same, just physically young again...then things would be fine as he grew. But If I truly de-aged him, reverted him to a point mentally as well as physically...then he will be different. He won't have any of the experiences that made him who he was...he'll no longer be the same Kouga. Oh, hells, what have I done....? Gods, I might as well have killed Inuyasha's mate, if that's the case! //

Miroku sighed and gave Inuyasha a sympathetic hug before scurrying after his mate. "I'm sure things will work out fine, Inuyasha!"

Inuyasha looked at the yawning little wolf demon in his arms. "Heh...fleabait, you make a cute kid, but I really gotta say...that chase didn't end anything like I thought it was going to."

Kouga gave him a toothy grin and snuggled up against his chest, yawning and curling his tail around his belly.

The hanyou sighed and headed back in towards his own room. "Figures. Well, I guess it would be about my turn to have something crazy happen...everyone else has had trouble, why not us, eh? Keh. Guess you can always play with the monk's kid if they can't fix you and I'll just...wait around until you get older to get my mate back...unless that bird comes up with a solution. See what happens when ya try to steal my dinner? Serves you right. It was food that ended us in this crazy relationship in the first place..."

With a slight smile at the memory, Inuyasha put the little wolf in his bed and then stretched out next to him, wondering how the hell he was going to explain this one to everyone....especially the wolf tribe's Council of Elders.


	116. Chapter 115

Pride (In the Name of Love) 115 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - This chapter...amused me. ^^

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Miroku sighed as he saw Sairex drop his head into a book with a loud groan. "Sairex, you've been reading almost all night. Come to bed and rest. Kouga's not been harmed, he can wait until the morning."

Sairex slowly turned to look at Miroku and snorted. "I don't tink you fully underztand da full ramifications of dis, Miroku. C'mere, sit down. I vant to zhow you zometing." The raven got out of his chair and moved his books. Miroku sat down, giving his lover a curious expression.

"So...er..."

"Vatch da vall. I'm going to zhow you vhat's going to happen here."

Miroku blinked and looked at the wall, arching an eyebrow. "Shadow puppets?"

"Yes. Zee, it's like dis..."

Miroku blinked as the shadows cast from Sairex's hands took on actual shapes instead of simple shadows. The one on the left took on a silhouette resembling Sairex, and the one on the right looked like Toga. The shadows even had tiny facial features, little holes cut in their inky fabric for eyes and mouths.

Shadow-Sairex walked happily up towards Shadow-Toga, whistling cheerily. Small shadowy music notes drifted up from the shadow and popped a few moments later. "Vell, hi dere, Lord Toga!"

Shadow-Toga smiled hugely and rested his hands on his hips. Sairex took on a deep voice for Toga's part and Miroku had to struggle not to laugh. "Vell, hi dere, Zairex!"

"Guess vhat! I'm a bloody moron and, as if you didn't have enough trouble from all zorts of other places, I vent and caused you more! I turned your zon's mate into a child. I may not be able to fix him. And on top of dat, his pack vill be leaderless, because da volf tribe is lead by ztrength and not blood!"

Shadow-Toga frowned deeply and crossed his arms over his chest. "Vhat zort of fledgling hedge-vizard are you?!"

"Oh, I'm not. In fact, I never botched a zpell dis badly. Hah, I vaited until it vould REALLY cause ALL zorts of political nightmares, not to mention da fact dat even if Kouga does grow up he might not be da zame person and I may as vell have killed your zon's mate!"

Shadow-Toga proceeded to pounce on a very distressed looking Shadow-Sairex and started pummeling him before launching into a series of wrestling moves. Miroku finally turned to look at his lover and sighed. Sairex let his hands drop and sighed heavily himself.

"You and I both know Toga wouldn't beat you up."

"Yes, vell, dat doesn't change da fact dat dis is no zimple zcrew-up on my part. Kouga could very vell lose leadership of his pack if dey find out...and Toga could lose his allies if dey zomehow came to tink dat dis vas done on purpose or vhatever."

Miroku stood up and blinked, something moving in the corner of his vision. He looked over. The miniature shadows were still fighting. The monk arched an eyebrow as he watched Shadow-Toga deliver a spine-cracking suplex to the very sad and abused looking Shadow-Sairex. "Er...how long are they going to keep that up?"

"Huh?...Oh. Er. Heh." Sairex murmured softly and the miniature silhouettes vanished just before Shadow-Toga could deliver a massive elbow drop onto the dazed Shadow-Sairex.

"I know it's a bad situation. You didn't do this on purpose, however, and there surely must be a way to fix it. And even if things do get tricky, we'll get through. Look at all else we've survived with all the trials poor Sesshoumaru has been put through. No one is dead or even injured and Kouga's still right here. It could be much, much worse. Now lay down and get some sleep. You need to be sharp if you're going to figure anything out. Pushing yourself past exhaustion won't do any good to anyone."

The raven sighed reluctantly but conceded, crawling into bed. Miroku hugged him close, and despite his earlier protests, Sairex was asleep in moments.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

A pair of heavy-lidded golden eyes slowly opened. Sesshoumaru caught sight of the tiny motion almost instantly.

Sometime early on in the day, Sairex's spell had broken and Toga had fallen immediately into an exhausted slumber. The next day's dawn was only a scant hour away.

Toga took mental stock of himself. He felt groggy and was still tired. There were a few lingering traces of pain from his wound, but nothing serious. He had more or less closed up.

// Damn, but my throat aches...// Toga's eyes slid over to a pitcher of water sitting on a table a short ways from his bed with a glass sitting next to it. // Keh, it's all the way over there... // Toga's gaze was drawn to Sesshoumaru as his son stood up abruptly, but the elder inu was too tired to be appropriate surprised. He hadn't even realized his pup was sitting in the room, so still and quiet had Sesshoumaru been.

Sesshoumaru flitted over to the water pitcher immediately, filling the glass and silently offering it to Toga as the elder taiyoukai propped himself up a bit to drink.

When he had sufficiently soothed the ache in his throat, Toga set the glass down and took a good look at Sesshoumaru, a slight frown creasing his lips.

Sesshoumaru's eyes were downcast, partially shrouded by his bangs. His pup was entirely too thin and his entire body seemed...tight, wired and coiled with some sort of high-strung nervous tension.

"My Sesshoumaru...?" Toga whispered softly. Sesshoumaru's gaze snapped up, and Toga was shocked at the way his pup's bloodshot eyes seemed to jitter, filled with a deep and haunted paranoia. His gaze didn't stay fixated on Toga's, instead occasionally darted off and returned after a split second. Sesshoumaru was hugging his arms tightly to his chest. The boy looked like he fully expected to be attacked by something horrific and huge at any moment. // ...Or that he'll wake up at any moment and discover that I am naught but a hallucination...oh, my poor Sesshoumaru, how you must have suffered...// "Sesshoumaru...please, come here. Lay with me. You do not look like you've slept much."

Sesshoumaru licked his lips nervously before answering. "N-no..I have not been able to sleep much." Still, Sesshoumaru made no move to approach Toga, staying where he was.

Toga's frown deepened. "Will you not join me, my Sesshoumaru? Please...I have missed you so terribly and ached to hold you close to me..."

Sesshoumaru quivered before letting his arms drop limply to his sides and his head falling forward as a low, pained whine tore itself from his soul. "Oh, my Lord Father, please, forgive me..."

Toga blinked in horrified shock at the utterly broken tone in Sesshoumaru's voice. "What? There is nothing to forgive! You have done nothing wrong!"

"I have sinned terribly...I have lusted for you..."

Toga's brow furrowed and his head ached. Damn this fuzziness in his brain...! "As have I for you. It was I who initiated our intimacy. Why on earth would you feel guilt for this?"

"No...Not just...I always have. Since before I had a name for it. It is why I never was interested in a mate...why I hated Izayoi so much...why I hated everyone else...who knows how many countless nights I had fraught with dreams I could not explain, could not put a face to?...Forgive me..."

Toga blinked, although he wasn't horribly shocked by the revelation. It simply made sense. Had he been looking for the signs, perhaps he would have noticed Sesshoumaru's interest far sooner...it simply hadn't even occurred to him. And if his pup had ever acted strange, well...he was Sesshoumaru. Even at his most normal behavior, Sesshoumaru was far different than anyone else Toga had ever interacted with. "Oh, my beloved Sesshoumaru...do not trouble yourself with such thoughts. There is nothing for me to forgive. Why would I ever be upset by your love when I love you as much as I do?"

Sesshoumaru slowly lifted his eyes. "...And then I was willing to believe you weren't real...that...none of this...."

"You were deceived, cruelly, and it is no fault of your own. Please...come to me, my son. Everything is alright."

"He marked me...and...and your mark is gone." Toga could plainly hear the shame in Sesshoumaru's tone.

"Nothing that can't be fixed. We will simply remove his mark as we have done before and I will happily reinstate my own physical claim on you."

Sesshoumaru eyed Toga, the tremulous doubt still obvious in his expression. His eyes widened a bit when Toga growled softly.

"Sesshoumaru...you are MINE. No matter what anyone else says, no matter what that horrible creature has said or done, no matter what false thoughts or doubts have run through your head. You belong to me and no other. That is something that runs far deeper than a simple scar. He marked your flesh but I hold your soul. You have always been mine, even if I did not realize it as soon as I should have."

"Yes, my Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru whispered, feeling tears of...relief?...gratitude...?...pricking the corners of his eyes. The strong note of command in Toga's voice was rapidly overwhelming the doubts and dissenting voices chewing on his mind.

"Now, Sesshoumaru...come here and lay down." It was neither a request or an offer, it was an order. There was no room for argument in Toga's voice. Sesshoumaru felt his body moving before his mind even caught up, and he slid under the covers, grateful to have the decisions taken out of his hands. Almost immediately he was pulled into a strong embrace. A soft, quavering sigh escaped Sesshoumaru's lips and he closed his eyes as Toga buried his face into his hair.

It felt so good and so freeing to finally allow his defenses to rest. Yes...he could be safe here if nowhere else.

Toga let out a soft sigh of his own, feeling tears slipping from beneath his eyelids. Dear gods, he had truly never expected to be able to hold his Sesshoumaru again. No matter how it had made his heart break, he had become more and more convinced that his beautiful pup was either dead or forever beyond his reach. He had retained some tiny shred of hope...but that had only served to deepen his heartbreak with each day that passed with no word or sign.

And yet, here Sesshoumaru was now, in his arms and curled quivering against his chest. His pup had surely suffered an indescribable, monstrous amount of torment. It had clearly taken its toll on him. Toga had never seen his son so frail and damaged, not even the first time he had been freed of the terrible dracolich.

But broken or not, damaged or used or ripped and discarded...his Sesshoumaru was lying in his arms once more. Perhaps it wasn't a solution, but it was a start.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha woke up with a yelp as something sharp sank into his ear. "Ow!" He jerked up to a sitting position and blinked as a tiny wolf-demon went flying, teeth unlatching from Inuyasha's ear.

A quick grab by the hanyou caught Kouga before he flew right off the bed. The little wolf landed on his belly on the mattress with a thump and squirmed around automatically so he was facing Inuyasha.

"What the hell was that for, ya...extra-scrawny wolf?"

"I was westling!"

Inuyasha squinted. "Oh, you can talk, can ya? And you can't wrestle me if you're so small."

"Can too. I'm th' toughest wolf eva!"

"Are you, now..."

"An'...an'...you just a stinky DOG and wolfses are better than dogs."

Inuyasha squinted. "Oh, is that what you think, squirt? And what exactly is a runt like you going to do to me?"

Kouga squinted his impossibly large blue eyes before letting out his fiercest growl and launching himself at Inuyasha, teeth-first. Inuyasha caught him by the tail and struggled to keep his limbs out of snapping jaws filled with sharp little teeth, growling himself...and the fight was on in full.

Some things never changed.


	117. Chapter 116

Pride (In the Name of Love) 116 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - This chapter encompasses....page five hundred. FIVE HUNDRED. o.o.... And here I meant this, originally, to be like...eh, 10 or 12 chapters long, a little practice fic for my first debut in writing Inuyasha fanfics...

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Sesshoumaru jumped sharply when he woke up, snapping fully awake in an instant. His eyes darted about wildly as he tried to assess the situation. He slowly calmed down as he realized reality seemed to have remained much like it had when he had last seen it, before falling asleep.

Toga's eyes had opened when he felt Sesshoumaru jerk, but he said nothing since his pup appeared to be calming down rapidly. He let his eyes slip shut again and began slowly stroking Sesshoumaru's hair, rumbling soothingly deep in his chest.

Sesshoumaru sighed softly, grateful that reality seemed to be just as he had remembered. "Mm...what time is it?"

Toga shrugged ever so slightly. "I'm not sure...I would say early afternoon, if I had to hazard a guess." The inu blinked a bit as his stomach growled. "Mm. And much as I don't want to get out of bed, I'm starved."

"Hn, you'd survive..."

"Only if I ate you. And while you certainly are delectable... you could use something to eat yourself. Besides...I regrettably have a lot of work to catch up on."

"This Sesshoumaru can assist you." Sesshoumaru forced down the blush that was threatening to overtake him utterly.

Toga smiled. "Thank you. It is appreciated." With great reluctance Toga pulled himself to a sitting position and groaned. "Ugh...My muscles are so stiff. How long have I been laying here?"

"From what I have gathered...roughly ten days."

Toga blinked. "Well. I imagine that would be why, then. Ten days? Hn. I don't remember much of anything."

"The miko drugged you and kept on drugging you until the raven's spell broke and you fell asleep. Even though you were awake, you were certainly not aware."

Toga nodded and stood up, stretching and wincing a bit. "Mm. I think a bath is definitely in order. Then food...and then I can play catch-up."

"I have done much of the paperwork, so it is not as bad as it might be otherwise. You are not so far behind."

"Then join me for a bath and breakfast."

Sesshoumaru nodded and gathered himself a change of clothing as his father did much the same. The two of them made their way to the baths, pausing only so Toga could tell one of the passing servants to pass along the word that he was awake, aware, and resuming his duties immediately...and to prepare a late breakfast for himself and Sesshoumaru. The servant scurried off to relay her message, and the two inus carried on to the bath.

Sesshoumaru sank into the water with a smile. He wondered idly how he could ever have fought against taking baths when he was a tiny pup and was grateful that he had grown out of that particular quirk. His smile faded a bit as he got his first real look at the healing scar on Toga's abdomen. // That must have been dreadful... and no one has told me how he got this injury. With as wide as it is, its a wonder he did not die. // "My Lord Father?"

"Yes, my Sesshoumaru?"

"How did you come by such an injury in the first place?"

Toga cringed inwardly. So his pup really didn't remember, then. But how to answer him? Sesshoumaru would accept a lie as truth if it came from him, but he would be quite put out if he ever learned the actual truth on his own...not to mention that having the knowledge broken to him poorly could be devastating.

Sesshoumaru frowned at his father's silence and obvious reluctance to answer. "I assume you would rather not tell me."

"That is true. However, I will not lie to you. You...thought me a hallucination sent to torment you as so many had before me and struck me with Sounga."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and his jaw dropped a bit. HE had...with Sounga...?

"I do not blame you for it, my Sesshoumaru. It was not your fault."

Sesshoumaru frowned deeply, looking down at the water. "It is a miracle you did not die, judging from the magnitude of what has yet to heal after ten days."

Toga bit his lip. It was one thing to let Sesshoumaru realize he was the cause of a more or less healed injury, but to share THAT little gem of information...that he had actually KILLED him...well... "Everything has worked out alright. I am here, alive and whole. Soon I'll even be fully pretty again."

Sesshoumaru snorted at that. "Pretty?"

Toga bat his eyelashes and pasted on his most winning smile. "Well, yes."

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes and splashed at Toga. "Yes, that will surely make the other demon lords cringe. The Inu no Taisho, prettiest demon in all the West. Yes, this Sesshoumaru can already feel their trembling."

Toga chuckled. "Eh, well...maybe I'll just stick with being the most powerful."

"Good. Besides, this Sesshoumaru is far prettier than you could ever be."

Toga squinted at Sesshoumaru. "Hn...brat."

"Oh, hush and turn around so I can wash your hair." Sesshoumaru smirked.

Toga huffed good-naturedly and did turn, enjoying being tended to immensely. "Well, you'll be even prettier when we get a little more meat on your bones. You are entirely too skinny at the moment."

Sesshoumaru sighed. "I am aware. I have...other things that I need to tend to as well." His gaze was drawn to the lurid red scar of Tsetsukosei's bite. "Actually, in thinking on it, I dearly wish to tend to the removal of this scar today, should the raven be able and willing."

Toga nodded. "That would be fine. If you have more or less kept up on the paperwork then I can certainly handle the remainder on my own."

"Yes. Good. I will...feel better once this is off of me and I am free to be appropriately labeled."

Toga chuckled and turned, catching Sesshoumaru by the chin and leaning in to give him a brief but intimate kiss. "And I shall be quite pleased to do so in the very near future, I assure you."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Breakfast was a quiet affair, considering it was just the two of them. Everyone else had already eaten earlier in the day. Afterwards, they parted ways. Toga went to his office to dig into the remaining work and Sesshoumaru headed off to talk to Sairex.

Towards evening, Toga had a surprise visitor. He was almost done for the day when a small knock sounded on his door. Curious, the inu set down his pen. "Enter."

The door was shoved open and Aliana came in, hauling with her a small box and a stick she had decorated to resemble Miroku's shakujou. Toga struggled not to chuckle at the sight of the tiny demon dressed up in monk attire. This time, Ali had foregone her bedsheets and actually taken one of Miroku's robes from his closet, even though it was far too large for her.

"Uncle Toga?"

Toga smiled and leaned back in his chair. "Yes, dear?"

Ali marched around the desk to look at him. "You look better. You are not sad anymore."

With a grin, the inu patriarch leaned over and scooped the little demoness into his lap. "No, I'm not. I was sad because my Sesshoumaru was missing. But now he is home and everything will be alright."

Ali beamed at him before opening her box. It was filled with her carefully drawn ofuda. Toga eyed the colorful talismans with an arched eyebrow.

"What are you going to do with those?"

"Well, I'm a monk." Ali nodded sagely and set the box on the desk before pulling out a small stack of her crayon-drawn ofuda. "And you're a demon, so I'm supposed to exorcize you because that's what monks do."

Toga blinked before nodding seriously. "Oh, I see...but why would you want to exorcize me? Do you think me a bad demon?"

Ali blinked as she began sticking the talismans on Toga. "No...I like you. You're a good demon."

Toga watched her apply more of the brightly colored tags to him, biting back his amusement. "I see. Well, if you like me and think me good, why would you wish to exorcize me?"

Ali blinked. "'Cause....cause....exorcizing is good for you. Uncle 'Yasha says so. He said I should do it every day and then I'll be a strong demon too!"

Toga blinked a few times before chuckling softly. // Exorcizing is good for....oh. Exercising...exorcizing...ah, children...// "Oh. Well, carry on, then."

Ali leaned in conspiratorially. "But I do have a very powerful charm that I can use and say 'Demon Begone' and make them go poof with my monkey powers."

"Monkey powers, eh?"

Aliana nodded seriously and lifted up a particularly impressive looking talisman. Toga eyed it and nodded gravely.

"Of course, I see."

All eyes turned to the door as Sesshoumaru walked in. The taiyoukai adjusted the bandages on his shoulder slightly before stopping dead and taking a good look at his father.

Sesshoumaru blinked several times. His father was covered in brightly drawn scraps of paper. He looked absolutely ridiculous.

Toga smirked. "Hey. This is nothing compared to some of the things I went through when YOU were a pup."

Aliana squinted at Sesshoumaru for a moment. She didn't know him very well. She turned her gaze back towards Toga and whispered rather loudly to him. "I'll show you the power of my demon-begone charm!"

"I don't think that'll be necessary..." Toga began, but the girl was already up. She made an elaborate series of gestures which probably meant nothing - but she thought they looked properly impressive- and lifted her charm.

"Demon begone!" Ali cried happily and whipped the thing at Sesshoumaru.

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows arched incredulously as the paper hit him, rolling his eyes up some to see where it had impacted on his forehead. His expression abruptly became one of shock and perhaps pain. There was a bright flash of light...and Sesshoumaru was gone.


	118. Chapter 117

Pride (In the Name of Love) 117 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - *sigh* I know. I'm evil and I torture you guys instead of just my characters with some of my cliffhangers...not that I would EVER specifically design chapters to end on such notes as I did last time just to giggle at all the reviews because *I* know what happened... XD

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Toga gasped and was on his feet in half a heartbeat, his jaw dropping as he stared in horrified disbelief at the spot where Sesshoumaru had just been standing. Aliana was staring wide-eyed at the spot, too - she had unfailing faith in her abilities, of course...but that didn't mean she expected Sesshoumaru to VANISH.

Toga froze when he heard a soft sound from behind him. It was a noise he had only heard a handful of times in his life. Ever so slowly, he turned around.

Sesshoumaru was leaning against the wall, laughing in high amusement.

Toga clutched at his chest and sank heavily into his chair, giving Sesshoumaru a glare that made the younger taiyoukai chuckle harder. "Ali, how about you go find your parents?" Toga murmured. The girl gave him a quick hug, bid him goodbye and grabbed her supplies before bouncing out of the room. Toga's gaze returned to Sesshoumaru, and Sesshoumaru's amusement returned in full. "You teleported...your brother is right, you ARE a bastard. You're trying to kill me..."

Sesshoumaru snickered. "Oh, come now, you know that isn't true. Besides, it's quite impossible for me to be a bastard, anyways...I happen to know quite well who my sire is and I am anything but an illegitimate child. I have ever been loudly proclaimed as the Son and Heir."

Toga rolled his eyes. "Oh-ho, aren't we funny today?...Amusing yourself at my expense...Hn. I thought my heart was going to stop."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "Really, my Lord Father...you know as well as I that it is entirely impossible for that girl to have any holy demon-banishing powers. She can claim herself a monk all she wishes, but the fact remains she is a pure-blooded demoness. I do not know what inherent powers she DOES have, given her heritage...but she is no monk and can never be."

"Well, I knew that...but...that was half the reason why it was so damn shocking to see you vanish...hn. Bitch."

Sesshoumaru bit back another snicker. "I am not a female any more than I am fatherless...you of ALL people should be aware of these things."

Toga rolled his eyes. "Oh, shut up. You are whatever I say you are. You're MY bitch regardless of your gender. At the very least, you're a damned brat."

"Alright. I'll concede the last, at least. I blame it on my upbringing. My Lord Father was quite the animal at times."

"Hn, where did I go wrong, to rear such an abusive, ungrateful whelp?" Toga growled with mock-seriousness as he stood up and stalked towards Sesshoumaru. "I provide you with a roof over your head...feed you, clothe you, educate you, train you...tend to all your...NEEDS..." At the last, Toga abruptly pinned Sesshoumaru to the wall, his voice having lowered to a husky purr. "...And this is how you repay me?"

Sesshoumaru felt an involuntary shiver run down his spine and very nearly melted on the spot. // Damn...he has such control over my body...a few words and a little purr and I'm practically moaning like a whore. And he KNOWS exactly what he does to me...and that I love it. // "Forgive me, my Lord Father, and allow me the chance to repent."

Toga smirked and then leaned in, crushing his lips to Sesshoumaru's in a heated and bruisingly passionate kiss, thoroughly ravaging the younger taiyoukai's mouth. When he finally pulled back, Sesshoumaru's eyes were somewhat glazed and he was panting. "Mm...as badly as I wish to make you mine again...I will not have our first time since your return ending up as something quick and wild on my desk."

Sesshoumaru was having a hard time processing words, but finally he nodded in agreement after his brain resumed normal function. "That...can be next time."

Toga grinned and gave him one more quick kiss before sinking back into his chair. Before either of them could say anything further, however, there was a knock on the door. "Hm. See? It's almost like I can see it coming now....Enter!"

Sesshoumaru leaned back casually against the wall as Sairex walked in. Toga immediately caught the distress in the raven's gaze and frowned - it wasn't like Sairex to be so obviously agitated.

"Sairex, what is it?"

"Lord Toga..." The raven sighed heavily and took a knee, bowing his head. "I beg your forgiveness, m'lord, but I'm afraid I've caused you a rather dreadful problem."

Toga frowned. "No need to stand on such decorum with me, Sairex, we are not in court. Stand up and tell me what's wrong."

Sairex made no move to rise in any way. "It is not zometing dat has reached your ears as yet because ve have been careful to keep da zituation contained. However...a couple days ago I vas attempting da time zpell I told you I vas vorking on for da past few years. I do not know if da zpell vill vork appropriately, as it vas..." Sairex sighed and then cringed, wanting to beat himself over the head. "I misfired it. Not only did I misfire it, but I targeted da misfire."

Toga's frown deepened. "Its not like you to make mistakes like that, Sairex." His tone was soft and it wasn't truly a chastisement and more a simple observation, but the raven flinched as if he had been beaten over the head with a small tree.

"I know."

"I'm assuming there is more to this tale?" the inu patriarch prodded gently.

Sairex sighed heavily. "Da one I accidently targeted vas Kouga, Lord Inuyazha's mate."

Toga and Sesshoumaru both exchanged a suddenly worried glance. "What was the fate of the wolf, then?"

"Da zpell zeems to have reverted him to childhood. I am as yet unaware of da extent of da damage. Physically, he is fine, even if he is young again. Mentally...I do not know. I am unsure if he vill retain any of his memories and vas merely physically youthened...or if he vas zent back in time and thus his memories past dat point in his life are erased as dey have never happened...or if he vill forget dem. I am working on finding a vay to reverse vhat I have done."

Toga sighed softly. "Well, at least he is alive and in no danger."

Sairex smiled bitterly. "Kaa...if I did destroy his mind and he does not have his memories any longer, I may as vell have killed your zon's mate. And vhen vord reaches his tribe, he vill zurely be dethroned, not to mention how dreadful dis vill look for your House in da eyes of da volves."

"The wolves will not move against us, but it would be a sad thing to lose them as strong allies. Do you think a solution to this will be forthcoming any time soon?"

Sairex shrugged with a dark scowl. "I have no idea. Toga, I am zorry for dis. I am. You have enough problems vith all da recent enemies moving against you and unresolved conflicts, and den I go and add to da mix..."

"It is alright, Sairex. I am sure you had no intention of things turning out thus."

"Vell, dat's true."

"Get to work on fixing it, then, and let me know if you need anything."

Sairex nodded and slid slowly from the room. Toga sighed and glanced over at Sesshoumaru. "Well...this is...disheartening."

"The wolf is alive and unhurt. Even if he does not remember things, if he grows up in this castle...he is still ultimately the same being. There is a very good chance he would end up mated to Inuyasha in the end regardless, and he could always reclaim his right to rule the wolf pack through combat. The mating was not annulled as neither of them has died. So the worst case scenario is that my brother simply has to wait for a time before reclaiming his mate."

"You completely avoided the political aspect of it."

"No need to discuss it. We both know it will be looked upon in a poor light no matter how we spin it. Since the mating was not annulled they are still technically bound and the wolves would be looked on in some disfavor should they try to withdraw... However, it is best to keep things under wraps as long as possible in case Sairex comes up with a solution."

Toga nodded. "Indeed. I am shocked, really...I've seen the raven perform many feats and never seen him make such errors."

Sesshoumaru gave his father a flat look. "My Lord Father...where my rambunctious brother and his equally wild mate are concerned...there is a high probability that they had a hand in causing this mishap in the first place, but the raven blames himself solely."

"This is probably true. Ah, well. I suppose I best finish up this paperwork...oh! What originally brought you here before you were....ahem...'banished'?"

Sesshoumaru shrugged slightly, a smile twitching his lips. "Habit and a desire to spend time in your presence, as always. Carry on, you'll never even know I am here. I believe I will rest. I have a headache and am weary."

"Ah, I am sorry to hear it. Did you not get enough sleep?"

Sesshoumaru frowned slightly. How to tell his Lord Father that his headache was a direct result of the voices warring in his head and from simple stress? His senses were on a hair-trigger at the best of times...but ever since he had come home, his paranoia had made him jump and startle at the tiniest little noise...he would see things out of the corners of his eyes...and many times, his mind would fabricate either a sight or sound to assail him with. All this...well, paranoia...was stressing him severely, not to mention thoroughly exhausting him and fraying his nerves.

"I simply need to rest...and I can do so more comfortably in your presence," Sesshoumaru finally said, offering Toga a faint smile as he stretched out on his couch and let his crimson-lidded eyes slip shut.

"Very well. Should you still be sleeping, I shall wake you when I am finished and ready for bed."

"Thank you, my Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru mumbled sleepily, already falling into an exhausted slumber.

Toga watched his pup for a long while, allowing a smile to play across his lips. It was so good to have him back again...felt so right to have him once more installed on his favorite couch as he sat here at this desk...a familiar and comfortable scenario played out thousands of times in their years together. Time had dulled the pain and emptiness Toga had felt for the latter part of Sesshoumaru's absence...but now, with his presence restored, he realized exactly how much and how painfully he had missed him.

// Please...whatever gods or fates listen to the prayers and pleas of an old demon like me...do not let anyone take him from me again. Do not let my Sesshoumaru suffer any more. He has hurt more than anyone ever should have had to...and not just because of the tortures he's went through. I know much of his trauma and much of his last two hundred years of pain was because of me...and that breaks my heart. I would gladly give myself to ease his pain. So please...spare my Sesshoumaru further cruelty. //

Eventually, Toga managed to tear his gaze from Sesshoumaru and got back to work. It took him a few hours, but he finally finished the last scroll and sat back in relief, stretching his back. // Mm. I'm still a bit sore... //

The inu stood and stretched out more thoroughly, blinking as a sudden thought occurred to him // Bloody hell! I can't believe I didn't think of it sooner...Sesshoumaru's mokomoko...and Tenseiga! I'm far less worried about the sword despite its usefulness. He must be suffering and hasn't said a word. Damn... //

Toga sighed and sat down next to Sesshoumaru, reaching out to lightly brush a few strands of hair from his pup's face, idly trailing his fingers over his cheek. // And yet he is sleeping so peacefully. I hate to wake him. He is truly a thing of beauty. He MUST be exhausted, though, to sleep soundly enough for me to be able to sit next to him and touch him and not wake him. I suppose we shall deal with what is missing on the morrow. //

Toga leaned in, lightly cupping Sesshoumaru's cheek and kissing him softly until a sleepy pair of golden eyes opened the tiniest bit. "Come to bed, my Sesshoumaru, you will be far more comfortable there."

Sesshoumaru made a sleepy little noise that sounded roughly like a 'mrr' and his eyelids slowly slid shut again. Toga couldn't help but to smile affectionately as he scooped his pup up and headed for the door, trying hard to beat down the alarm and how underweight his son was. // Eh. That'll be fixed in time, though... //

Sesshoumaru mumbled something unintelligible and simply snuggled into Toga's chest a bit, far too sleepy for anything more complicated.


	119. Chapter 118

Pride (In the Name of Love) 118 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Sorry to have missed yesterday's update, but I had to work first shift which royally screws up my entire schedule...I don't have time to write in the morning and am so exhausted by the time I get home that I have no recourse but to sleep. Coupled with the fact I had some errands in town...I just didn't have the time. Heh. This one came late due to....circumstance. I should have tomorrow's pretty much on time, though.

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Naraku was sprawled idly on his bed and staring at the ceiling. He sighed, bored, and was contemplating finding Inuyasha to tease when he received a knock on his door. Blinking in surprise - after all, his company was not something that was ever really sought out in the Western Castle - he sat up. They had kept him around, he knew, because it was better to keep him close in case he tried something dastardly rather than for any desire to show him hospitality.

"The door is open," the kumo finally said. He was further surprised when none other than the Inu no Taisho himself swept into the room. // Always so dramatic-looking, the elder two inus...armor and flowing fluffy things and whatnot. I wonder if they do it on purpose? Inuyasha should take lessons. // "Well. Good morning."

Toga nodded. "I have not yet properly thanked you for your role in the retrieval of my Sesshoumaru, and wish to do so. My gratitude is deep."

Naraku waved it away idly. "Eh. I wanted to ransom him off so I could take control of your castle..." Toga's eyebrows hiked and he gave the kumo a doubtful look. Naraku continued quickly. "...But I decided it was entirely too much work to run something like this. I'd be happy just to have an attendant or two."

Toga smirked a bit. "Well, I suppose that will be a small enough price to pay for the service you have already rendered and the one I shall ask of you now."

Naraku's own eyebrow lifted at that. "You plan on asking a favor of me?"

"Yes. You are, as yet, the only one that knows the location in which my Sesshoumaru was held previously. While I do not intend to go out of my way to fight the dracolich at this time...I need to retrieve Sesshoumaru's mokomoko and, if at all possible, Tenseiga."

Naraku appeared to consider it for a long moment. "So you wish for me to guide you there to get these things."

"Yes."

Naraku was silent for a long moment before shaking his head. "No."

"No?" Toga narrowed his eyes a bit. Being told 'no' was not something he was particularly used to. Surely, he was usually quite in control of himself and could take a bit of criticism....but it didn't stop his hackles from rising a bit regardless. "Explain."

"I will do it myself."

Toga scowled slightly. "And why is that?"

Naraku sighed heavily. "I broke into that damned place a lot easier than I broke out. I can shapeshift and blah blah. Believe me when I say I can do this far more efficiently and quickly alone, with a far smaller chance of detection, than if I go with you. Besides, you're needed here. What if something goes wrong?"

Toga stared at the kumo in wary surprise. "You...will go alone?"

"Well...it'd be nice if the raven came with me at least part of the way. I'm terribly unfamiliar with the territory. Believe me when I say I won't let him come in with me either, I merely need a guide."

Toga mulled it over. It wasn't that he didn't appreciate the offer, nor that he was afraid for Sairex's wellbeing if the raven was simply providing guidance...he was far more worried about Sairex's fixation on fixing Kouga and whether or not the raven would even comply. // He has to. Sesshoumaru is suffering without his mokomoko, even if he does not let it show. // "I shall request Sairex's assistance. And...I do thank you for this."

"Hn. I'm just doing it to hold it over you in the future so I can exploit you and yours for my own ends."

The inu patriarch smiled. "Ah. Yes. Of course." Toga inclined his head and then slid from the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Darting golden eyes were - more or less - fixated on the calm fish pond in front of him. A small waterfall fed crystalline water into the pond continuously. Occasionally, a bright silvery flash hinted at one of the pond's denizens darting near the surface of the water.

Sesshoumaru had always loved this garden. It was secluded and gave the illusion of being in its own private little world, what with the way the vines grew up the walls and hid them...the deceptive feeling of distance due to the unbalanced levels of the terrain...yes, Sesshoumaru had always been fond of the place. He recalled, with a brief grin, how he had once claimed it as his own autonomous nation when he was small. His Lord Father hadn't argued, either. Toga had never argued his outrageous claims or dissuaded him from some of his childish schemes, but had always agreed and humored him. // Of course, // Sesshoumaru mused, // He was always able to casually distract me from almost all of my plots back to normal life, and I never noticed him doing it. //

Sesshoumaru's eyes stopped their nervous jittering as he allowed himself to be lost in thought, reflecting on his childhood. It had always been something - he was never still. He always had the next new plan to make himself the greatest and most powerful demon lord ever. Really, it amounted to wanting to be just like his dearly beloved Lord Father, his constant companion and the guiding light of his life.

Sesshoumaru's eyes slid mostly shut as he lazily contemplated his childhood. It had been a good one. Toga had doted on him, given him everything he wanted, humored him, protected him, and yet still guided him in a calm and orderly fashion to make sure he took his lessons and learned the things he would need to know to be Lord himself one day. Toga had never discouraged his pride, but had quietly leashed it and made sure Sesshoumaru knew his limitations. He had taught him well, without humiliating him or discouraging him, not to ever give in to any pride in himself that was not fully deserved. Ultimately, Sesshoumaru had ended up with a hell of an ego...but it was almost wholly justifiable.

Sesshoumaru had almost fallen asleep when an incredible crash sounded behind him. The taiyoukai leapt up in startled panic, eyes darting wildly and his coherency ripping to shreds as the voices in his head began giving him conflicting directions on how to deal with this threat.

Inuyasha paused in chasing an incredibly fast little Kouga - who had stolen his lunch and darted into the gardens - when he caught sight of Sesshoumaru. The taiyoukai had backed up until he was flat against a tree, claws digging into the bark and his eyes rolling wildly. "Shit...Sessh, I didn't mean to startle you...are you alright?"

Sesshoumaru gave no outward sign that he heard Inuyasha, quivering between flight and lashing out blindly. When nothing happened around him or to him, the directionless terror slowly evaporated, and the taiyoukai slid to his knees bonelessly.

Inuyasha was at his side in an instant. "Shit! Sesshoumaru....hey, Sessh, can you hear me?" Hesitantly, the hanyou reached out to touch his brother's arm.

Sesshoumaru jerked back with a startled yelp as if he had been struck, his gaze casting about wildly before finally catching sight of Inuyasha. "I...Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha nodded warily, feeling rather guilty. "Yeah, its just me...I'm sorry for all the noise. I was just trying to catch Kouga...we didn't know you were out here. I didn't mean to surprise you."

Sesshoumaru slowly stood back up, mentally cursing the shaking in his limbs, the quivering in his breathing and the frightened pounding of his heart. "It...I'm fine. I just...I was not expecting company."

"Heh. Yeah, I know wh-...shit, hide me!" Inuyasha attempted to duck behind Sesshoumaru, but it was too late.

Naraku approached with a cheery smile. "Inuyasha!"

Inuyasha bristled. "Get the fuck away from me, you creep..." Before the hanyou could react, however, Naraku was behind him and had reached out to grab Inuyasha's fuzzy ears, rubbing them gently.

"Aw, I'm going to miss these..."

"GAH!" Inuyasha tore himself free and leapt halfway across the garden. "Damn straight you are, because you're never going to touch 'em again!"

Sesshoumaru slowly looked between the two of them and shook his head, deciding it was best to stay out of it.

Naraku sighed dramatically. "Well, I just wanted to say goodbye before I left...you don't have to be so rude about it. How about something for good luck?"

Inuyasha's eyes widened at the suggestive smirk on the kumo's face. "FUCK you....stay AWAY..."

"I don't think I can do both at the same time, although I AM pretty flexible and stretchy..."

Inuyasha growled in helpless frustration before a thought momentarily stole his ire. "Wait...goodbye? Where the fuck are you going?"

"I have a mission from your father so I'll be gone for a while."

Both of the brothers glanced at each other and then Naraku. Inuyasha's eyes widened in disbelief.

"Our old ma--OW!" Inuyasha didn't even see Sesshoumaru move before he got slapped upside the back of the head hard enough to plant his face in the hillside.

Sesshoumaru eyed Naraku. "Our Lord Father entrusted a mission to y ou?"

Naraku looked over and snickered to himself at the sight of a now wholly incensed Inuyasha spitting grass and dirt as he sat up. "Yes. I'll be departing with your advisor, Sairex, shortly. Apparently the raven has some things to take care of before we go."

Inuyasha growled angrily at Sesshoumaru. "What the FUCK did you do that for?!"

Sesshoumaru eyed him for a moment with oh-so-familiar disdain briefly flickering across his features. Inuyasha would have welcomed the sight of his brother looking so...well, Sesshoumaru-ish...had it not been directed at him. "You will respect our Lord Father in my presence at all times, hanyou. I will forgive your lack of proper appellation, but I will not allow you to refer to him so rudely."

Inuyasha scowled. "Keh...I don't actually mean any insult by it. And face it, he IS old, even by demon standards. It's practically unheard of to live to his age."

Sesshoumaru glared at Inuyasha. "His age is a testament to his power. Further, our Lord Father is no human and thus cannot be referred to as a 'man' in any situation."

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Dammit, just when I was starting to think that maybe you DON'T have a stick rammed up your ass all the way to your throat, you have to go and prove me wrong..."

Naraku looked between the two of them before shrugging and heading out of the garden. Neither of the brothers seemed to pay his departure any heed.

Sesshoumaru scowled. "I cannot help that you are such a base, loutish cretin. Must you always be so crass and crude? Can you not speak in a manner befitting your station?"

"Oh, bite me, you supercilious ass!"

"You know a word as complex as 'supercilious' and yet your normal speech is that of an uncultured heathen. This Sesshoumaru fails to understand why that is."

Inuyasha growled. "And here I was, all concerned for you...you're a damned bastard, Naraku's a creepy fucking lech, and my damn lunch ran off with a fucking flea-ridden wolf...keh. Fuck my life."

Toga blinked, leaning against a nearby tree and waiting for either of his boys to notice him. Kouga was sitting in the crook of his arm and happily finishing the remains of Inuyasha's lunch. The inu patriarch simply shook his head slowly as he watched his pups.

"This Sesshoumaru thinks you're an ungrateful barbarian. You should shut up while you're ahead."

"Eh, I might be a barbarian but I can still kick YOUR ass, you pompous, prissy prick!"

"Oh, nice alliteration, little brother. Perhaps you have a talent or two after all."

"I don't kn-- Oh, I'll give you an alliter-what the fuck ever it is you said!" With a growl, Inuyasha launched himself at Sesshoumaru. His elder brother may have been a bit off his game and still recovering, but he was still able to catch Inuyasha in midflight, the two of them landing in a heap on the ground and snarling viciously.

Toga sighed. // Perhaps it would have been better if I had daughters? // He winced as Inuyasha let out a yelp at a particularly nasty clawing, and his wince turned into an outright cringe at Sesshoumaru's angry snarl as the hanyou yanked his hair hard. // I'm so glad I was an only child... //

That thought in mind, the inu patriarch set Kouga down and headed over to break up his boys.


	120. Chapter 119

Pride (In the Name of Love) 119 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I've been watching RK lately, and I have to say...Kenshin is such a doll. A f'in schizo, to be sure....but seriously, he's a cutie. Anyone that can waffle between being an adorably clueless housewifey type to a ruthless, cold epitome-of-badass manslayer has my love. Even if he doesn't kill, that does not affect his badassery. I'd SO probably write a fic on the side if I thought there was anything resembling an audience for it. Lol...ah, well. And my DVD ROM on my comp stopped working so I couldn't get the screenshot I wanted to use as my new background. =( Sorrow. ((on the highly unlikely chance that someone has such a pic... the scene from Ep. 44 where Kenshin is totally overjoyed to see his master and is all "MASTERRRR!" and does a super-happy flying tackle glomp at him....XD I laughed so hard when I saw that... ))

On an unrelated note...I'm afraid I have to take a short break after this chapter. I assure you all it has nothing to do with me losing interest and everything to do with the fact that my bedroom is getting a wall and ceiling replaced. Should I find a way to get my computer set up elsewhere in the house with enough private time to write while my room is being redone, I shall...but otherwise...due to my work schedule tomorrow and whatnot...posts will be sporadic at best until the end of next week. I promise to do what I can, but if I can't get on all week...that's why.

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Later that evening, Naraku and a rather reluctant Sairex departed for the Black Circle on their mission to retrieve Sesshoumaru's mokomoko and the Tenseiga. Naraku had learned that, in addition to his shapeshifting, he could also change his size and density with a bit of concentration. To speed their travel, he changed himself into a very small version of his normal form and settled comfortably on Sairex's back. Sairex was in raven form and Naraku figured the bird made a fine steed, indeed.

Once he was convinced that Naraku was secure, the raven shot off into the sky. It would be a long trip, but well worth it provided they were successful in their mission.

It took the better part of three days for them to finally reach Tsetsukosei's hideout. Naraku had had plenty of chances to rest on the way there but Sairex was tired, having flown straight through. The raven found himself a secure place to sleep while Naraku infiltrated the dracolich's lair.

Naraku wasted no time in liquefying his body and seeping through cracks in the stone and into the building without drawing the attention of any of the constructs and undead guarding the gates. He traveled swiftly through the structure. although he knew it would take him quite a while to search due to the castle's size. Then it would be simply a matter of grabbing things and getting out without being caught.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga stretched out idly in the middle of his massive bed, clad only in a loose pair of pants and propped up comfortably on one of his mokomokos. With the other he was idly tossing a small ball up in the air, using the furry length to catch it and then toss it again. // Meh. Boredom really does not become me... //

His gaze snapped towards the door when Sesshoumaru slid into the room. "Mm, about time you showed up. I was going to go to sleep without you."

Sesshoumaru snorted. "Right...I'm beginning to doubt you even can sleep without something to snuggle."

Toga smirked. "Oh, I can...I just see no reason to. Besides, what's wrong with snuggling?"

"A fearsome demon lord you are, indeed..." Sesshoumaru quipped, idly running a comb through his hair. "Oh, fear me, for I am the cuddly Inu no Taisho."

Toga's grin widened. "Just because I'm cuddly doesn't mean I can't be fierce."

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes and set down his comb before standing to finish stripping. Before he could pull on his sleeping pants, however, a mokomoko curled around his waist and hoisted him aloft and then pulled him over to Toga.

Sesshoumaru eyed the furry mokomoko and then Toga with a wry smirk. "You could have at least waited until I dressed..."

"What's the point when I just plan on taking it off of you anyways?" Toga asked with a smirk, idly trailing his fingertips down Sesshoumaru's arm. The younger taiyoukai's eyes widened a bit but he didn't bother to protest, feeling a rush of heat go through him.

"Ah...and you couldn't have simply asked me to join you?"

"It's more fun to toss you around," Toga responded with a lazy smirk before leaning in and nipping gently at Sesshoumaru's ear. "Mm...I want you. I've missed you..."

Sesshoumaru's eyelids fluttered shut at the continuing little licks and nibbles that were trailing down from his ear to his throat. "Mm..this Sesshoumaru is yours to do with as you please..."

Toga let out a pleased growl as he shifted position to pin Sesshoumaru down, staring into his pup's half-lidded golden eyes. "Yes...yes you are. You are mine, and it is high time that you bear my mark once more...fully time that you are aware of just how much you belong to me...no one else can ever, will ever...own you as I do."

Sesshoumaru didn't have time to voice an opinion on the matter before Toga's mouth was crushed against his own. He willingly surrendered himself, content to engage him in a duel of tongues which they both won.

So caught up was he in the kiss, the feel of Toga's hands idly wandering over his chest and down his sides, that Sesshoumaru didn't notice the twin mokomokos before it was too late and they were firmly coiled around his wrists, pinning them down against the mattress. The younger inu let out a tiny muffled noise of surprise and gave an experimental tug at his bonds. They didn't budge - not that he had really expected them to. Toga had always overpowered him in sheer physical strength.

Sesshoumaru let out a low groan as Toga's fingers idly trailed along the length of his cock. His senses whirled in confusion that ultimately melted into arousal. If questioned, Sesshoumaru could NEVER have explained how all the things he instinctively hated turned into such powerful turn-ons in Toga's hands. He had always...still...despised the thought of being dominated...would NEVER submit to being bound or made helpless in any way...and yet those very things shot him full of lust where Toga was concerned.

Toga had no such confusion and reveled in his dominance over Sesshoumaru. Having a willingly submissive mate was a thrill in and of itself...but when that mate was naturally disinclined to submit to anyone over anything...THAT submission was so much more powerful, so much more meaningful. Both of them knew that he would never, ever push Sesshoumaru into anything that was unwanted, that most of the overly dominant displays were just for the sheer pleasure of it...and that was what made the game they played so thoroughly enjoyable.

Toga leaned back to admire the picture of Sesshoumaru gasping and starting to writhe under him as he idly but firmly worked his hand over his erection. A slightly mischievous smile flickered across Toga's lips as he withdrew his hands, not wanting to bring Sesshoumaru off just yet. Sesshoumaru let out a tormented moan, his hips arching a bit, unable to get his hands free to act in any way.

"Oh...p-please, my Lord Father..."

Toga sighed and leaned in to nip at Sesshoumaru's jaw. "Mm. You do beg so prettily..."

"Hnnn..." Sesshoumaru couldn't think of much of an argument for that one. His moan turned into a sharp breathless cry and his back bowed when Toga smiled at him devilishly and worked a finger into him, hooking it JUST right to tease his prostrate.

Toga admired his handiwork for another few moments before leaning back in and nipping at Sesshoumaru's jaw again, a growl, a demand rumbling in his chest even as he added a second finger. Sesshoumaru responded automatically and almost bonelessly to Toga's demand, baring his throat in submission as he let his head fall back. Toga's growl took on a rather pleased note as he immediately began licking and sucking at his pup's throat, occasionally punctuating the softer gestures with a sharp bite.

Sesshoumaru was helplessly, hopelessly aroused at the moment but couldn't gather his wits about him enough to form words to beg properly. All he knew is that he was desperately hot, his body aching for something besides Toga's wicked fingers, wanting to get wholly lost in the pleasure almost as much as he wanted Toga to get lost in that same pleasure with him. In some distant way, Sesshoumaru realized that being the submissive partner in sex didn't necessarily mean he didn't have any control over the situation...and oh, how he thrilled to know the mind-numbing pleasure he had the power to bring his Lord Father.

Deciding he had tormented the boy enough - and not sure how much more he would be able to resist anyhow - Toga withdrew his fingers. He wasted very little time in kicking off his pants before resuming his position on Sesshoumaru. The younger taiyoukai could only gasp as he felt Toga's arms curl around his waist, crushing him to his own body...the mokomokos on his wrist tightening their grip and pinning him down...and sharp teeth latching into his throat as Toga's hips drove forward, impaling him with one swift thrust.

Sesshoumaru's mind was reeling and he was aware of his own sharp cry. He was utterly helpless to move in any way, wrapped up in Toga's powerful embrace, bound at the wrists and held at the throat. Rather than instill a sense of panic in him, however, it felt...RIGHT. He was entirely and utterly possessed, loved and cherished in a way that no one else could ever understand. In this moment, he felt complete. Nothing was missing from his life. He had everything he could possibly want.

Even those thoughts shattered and melted into sparks and tiny flickers of lightning dancing behind his eyes as Toga began to move in him. He wasn't exactly being rough, but he wasn't being gentle either. Each thrust of his hips was made of power and love and dominance, and Toga seemed VERY determined to drive that point home with authority.

The inu patriarch really wasn't sure how long he could hold out and he was quite certain Sesshoumaru wouldn't last much longer. His pup was moaning incoherently, overwhelmed with sensation. Toga couldn't help but allow a fierce grin to curl his lips as he briefly released his pup's throat, his arms tightening around Sesshoumaru as he nailed him to the sheets. Oh, but he DID so love to smash Sesshoumaru's stoic facade and send his wits scattering to the winds beyond a prayer of recollection...and FUCK, nothing could compare to the feel of that tight, velvety heat threatening to strangle his erection with every move he made.

Sesshoumaru felt himself falling into a bottomless, silvery oblivion...drowning in sensation too intense to name. Everything twisted up inside him and then exploded with enough force to dim the edges of his vision, a loud howl tearing from his throat as his orgasm left him utterly shattered and mindless.

Toga let out a rather loud noise of his own as his own climax was wrung from him a split second later. He sank his fangs deeply into Sesshoumaru's neck as the first throes of pleasure cascaded through him, the sweet taste of blood on his tongue even as the devastating waves of pleasure shuddered through him.

Neither of them moved for a very long moment - not that Sesshoumaru could have even if he had the energy. Toga finally gathered his wits about him enough to slowly release Sesshoumaru from his powerful grip, his mokomokos untangling. He rolled over and pulled Sesshoumaru's limp form along with him, still gently licking and sucking at the wound he'd made, his fingers idly threading through Sesshoumaru's hair.

Sesshoumaru didn't think he had the strength to so much as twitch and simply lay against Toga, the occasional shiver of pleasure running through him as the elder inu continued his ministrations to the rather deep bite wound. The wound itself ironically didn't seem to hurt, although Sesshoumaru figured that had something to do with the extreme sensory overload he had just experienced.

Eventually Toga released his neck and leaned in to give Sesshoumaru a long, slow and deep kiss. "Mm...there. Now you are mine again."

"Ever have I been..." Sesshoumaru whispered with a slight smile.

"I know." Toga smiled and nuzzled him gently, more than happy to cuddle and let blissful lethargy steal over him.

Sesshoumaru had already succumbed to the heavy drowsiness assailing him and fell asleep with the faintest of dazed smiles twitching at his lips, utterly content.


	121. Chapter 120

Pride (In the Name of Love) 120 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Haha! Sneaking a chapter in while the sneaking is good. I really SHOULD be hauling furniture but I....feel guilty not updating daily...and since my computer is still not unhooked...I'll make a little time to squeeze in an update. THIS one probably will be my last for a few days. The painter / builder guy gets here first thing tomorrow morning to start work, so unless I manage to hook my comp up somewhere else in the house...heh, unlikely that I could write in public...yeah. I should be back to normal by the end of the week though. (Course, I have to move everything BACK into my room too...ugh.) So consider this your farewell chappie instead. ((And yes, you can hate me know, it is going to end on a cliffhanger of sorts.))

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Tsetsukosei snorted as he blinked fully awake, puzzling over the rather curious scene before him. He had sensed...something...but couldn't pinpoint the slippery energy.

Upon looking up, he watched Sesshoumaru's mokomoko slide past his door along the floor, looking for all the world like some sort of strange, furry snake.

// What in all the hells...? // The dracolich got to his feet and headed towards the door, slowly poking his bony head out to observe the mokomoko. It had paused. The moment his head appeared in the doorway, however, the furry thing jumped in alarm and then shot off down the hallway.

Naraku cursed mentally as the dracolich bounded out of the doorway in pursuit. This mokomoko was proving very troublesome, far more so than the Tenseiga had.

Naraku had found the two items together, as luck would have it, in one of the underground storage rooms. Tsetsukosei either had not known their uses - unlikely, at least on the part of Tenseiga - or had not thought anyone would ever find this place and had thus not bothered to hide them or guard them in any real fashion.

Tenseiga had been easy enough to attune to his power, and soon Naraku was able to shapeshift and the sword would shift with him, just like his clothes and other items he carried. The kumo strapped the blade to his belt and proceeded to ignore it.

Sesshoumaru's mokomoko was a different matter altogether. It wasn't merely an object - it was a demon of sorts in it's own right. It wasn't exactly alive, but nor was it truly inanimate. Naraku scowled. The mokomoko was some sort of strange, parasitic, pseudo-lifeform, a manifestation of Sesshoumaru's demon-form and yet partially it's own entity as well. While Naraku wasn't really bothered by the fact that the odd furry thing was somewhat alive...the fact that it was a demon for his purposes meant he could not attune it to himself. No matter what he tried, if he attempted to force his power on the mokomoko, his body attempted to absorb it.

Absorbing the mokomoko would have assuredly been counterproductive to what he was trying to accomplish, especially since he wasn't really aware of how to UNabsorb things, or if he even could. That left no choice but to carry the thing out. He couldn't shapeshift it and haul it through the walls, as he had entered. Taking on his full-sized form would draw unwanted attention. The mokomoko was surprisingly lightweight, and so Naraku compromised with what he felt was his best option for avoiding immediate detection. He shrank himself down to a height of a mere handful of inches, grabbed hold of the furry length, and took off down the hall. He still possessed his full demonic strength and speed, even in his shrunken state, and so it was no trouble to buzz along the halls as he headed towards the exit, praying that nothing would notice the mokomoko seemingly moving of its own accord.

Much to his chagrin, Tsetsukosei himself had.

Naraku cursed again and ran full speed for a crack in the stone wall. The end of the mokomoko squeezed through just as Tsetsukosei reached the wall. Naraku felt like all the world like a mouse diving into a hole just ahead of a cat.

Tsetsukosei lowered his head, attempting to get one of his malevolent red eyes even with the crack in the stone. The dracolich was baffled, truly. Was this strange furry thing Sesshoumaru had been wearing actually alive? Why had it waited so long to move? What the HELL, seriously?...

Naraku huffed in annoyance. The only weapon he had that would work against the dracolich was the Tenseiga...and the kumo was the first to admit he was NOT a master of swordsmanship. He could hold his own against most...but somehow he doubted that that would be enough to take out this powerful undead fiend - and that was supposing he could even properly wield Tenseiga. As the beast wasn't truly alive, his miasma would be worthless. Despite inroads on his abilities that he had made thus far, Naraku still hadn't learned much in the way of combat or using his body for such a purpose. Any time he tried to focus on being properly ruthless, his head started to ache and he soon gave up.

So he was trapped, then. What to do?...What to do, indeed...

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

As hours turned into a couple of days, Sairex began to worry. The raven would be the first to admit he had no love for the kumo. However...Naraku literally wasn't capable of regaining any true sense of evil with his mind damaged. His amoral but relatively minor schemes were, while not always nice, generally harmless. The Naraku that had hurt his mate was as good as dead. THIS Naraku had actually been helpful, even if he had done it largely for selfish reasons. Or, at least, self-proclaimed selfish reasons...Sairex figured that half the time, they were simply covers. Couldn't be seen doing something nice, after all. While Sairex didn't actually LIKE Naraku now, he couldn't honestly bring himself to DISLIKE him either.

So when Naraku did not arrive, Sairex began to worry. This was not good. Something was wrong. // So what do I do?...I know how important that damn fluffy is. Toga told me about his own, before, and it only stands to reason Sesshoumaru's is just as fully important. That sword is incredible, too. And damn it all, I can't just abandon the kumo. But I really don't know if I would survive Tsetsukosei. I've some skill with a blade, but nowhere close to what I'd need to damage something as big and stout as him. I don't have the power, nor do I know what or where his phylactery is. And I fear this time he WOULD kill me. His anger at me outweighs my worth to him. //

Sairex scowled as he slipped into his humanoid form. Honestly, his mind had been made up before his mental argument.

He was not like his long-dead kin. The raven would not leave an ally behind.

With a grim look of determination, Sairex took to the sky towards Tsetsukosei's lair.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Life in the West was progressing at as normal a pace as any of them had ever seen. Miroku missed his mate dearly, but accepted his absence as necessary and went about his days in relative peace and quiet.

Aliana missed her father as well, but was largely distracted from worrying about it by playing with her new best friend Kouga. The two young demons both possessed seemingly limitless energy and bounded about the castle and its grounds, playing games with rules that baffled any of their adult onlookers.

Sesshoumaru was blissfully content and hadn't had any sort of relapses in the past few days, feeling safe and more or less protected in his Lord Father's presence. He made it a point to stay in said presence, and Toga was more than happy to have him near, enjoying Sesshoumaru's company.

Not to mention, of course, the fact that their relationship, renewed after so long apart, left the both of them with a burning desire to make up for lost time and soothe their long pent-up hormones....which they did at every given opportunity.

Both Toga and Sesshoumaru were in the study at the moment. Toga was making a genuine effort to deal with some of his paperwork, and Sesshoumaru was helping...although their conversation had begun a definite drift from business and was becoming more and more laden with innuendo and flirtation, starting to melt into outright seduction. Really, Toga knew that the main reason he was behind on any of the work, especially with Sesshoumaru's help, was the fact of just how many times the past few days had resulted in piles of scrolls being knocked off the desk and having to be resorted...things getting rumpled or torn and having to be rewritten...and just how much time had been spent using the study of late for things that were assuredly NOT business related.

Toga smirked as he idly fingered his quill pen, debating on whether or not he should give up this rapidly failing attempt at getting some work done and simply move on to ... other things. // Heh. I'm acting like a damned pup that just discovered sex myself. I have no excuse...I just can't help it. Three years was a long time and...well...he's so hard to resist, especially when he's so damn willing. //

This time, however, fate had decided they would not be accidentally destroying documents in the throes of passion, nor leaving unexplainable claw-marks in the walls or the rugs or the desk. Or breaking the chair again...Toga's back had hurt for the rest of the day after that one but he really couldn't say it hadn't been worth it.

Toga and Sesshoumaru both looked up at the sudden knock on the door. "Enter."

One of their personal attendants entered and bowed respectfully to them both. "My Lords." This attendant, Enriki, was an old and wily coyote demon. He had once been a fearsome warrior, but battle had left his right side mangled. He could walk but his leg was stiff, and his arm didn't have enough mobility to wield a sword properly. He knew he didn't have enough range of motion with his crippled leg to properly practice swordsmanship anyway, so he didn't bother trying to learn more than basic defense with his left hand. His mind was still sharp and intact, however, and he made a shrewd and observant attendant, proving useful to the inu clan many times since he had taken up the post.

Toga nodded in response. "Yes, Enriki, what is it?"

"My Lord, you have a very mysterious visitor requesting an audience."

Toga arched an eyebrow. "What do you know of this visitor?"

"Sire, she is female and claims to be a Lady, here on a diplomatic visit to discuss political matters. I cannot tell you of what species, for she is heavily clothed and cloaked. Her scent is masked under an exotic perfume. She carries no obvious weapons, and her aura is powerful but not overwhelming. I saw no sign or seal on her, her attendants, or the carriage she arrived in to indicate where she hails from. She appears to be a Lady of some wealth, if the means in which she travels or the quality of her clothing is any indication."

Toga nodded, musing. "I see...your opinion, Enriki?"

"She is no threat to one such as you, my Lord, or to your sons. She has power, but it is not great. Even if she carries a concealed weapon...few indeed are those that could hope to bring it to bear against the Inu no Taisho...and Lord Sesshoumaru is present as well. There is no danger, in my opinion."

"Very well. See her in."

Enriki bowed and left to escort their guest in.

Toga offered Sesshoumaru a sly grin as he slid his current scroll to the side and set his pen down. "We will continue OUR discussion...later. I am very intrigued to hear what it was you intended to do with the wine you mentioned."

Sesshoumaru smirked and smoothed some imperceptible wrinkles from his haori. "This Sesshoumaru will be more than pleased to show you, my Lord Father."

The two inus were both properly arranged by the time Enriki returned and rapped politely on the door. Toga granted him permission to enter and he did, escorting their guest.

Just as the coyote had said, she was covered head to toe in unrevealing but richly woven cloth, her face shrouded in the darkness of a deep hood. Enriki bowed and slid from the room, closing the door behind him.

Toga frowned, something sparking in his mind that he just couldn't put a finger on. "Greetings, my Lady...I do not believe we have had a proper introd-- Sesshoumaru?!"

Toga's head jerked over in alarm as Sesshoumaru leapt to his feet and scrambled backwards, hitting the wall and sinking to his knees with a low, keening moan. His eyes were huge and filled with wild-eyed panic as he stared at her. Toga was frozen halfway over to his pup, however, when the Lady spoke, her voice full of command and a tinge of wicked delight.

"Toga, sit back down. Now. We have MUCH to discuss."

The inu patriarch could not have been more shocked. Her voice spiked through his belly like a lance, twisting his gut and strangling his heart. He was too choked, too surprised to speak. Slowly, he turned to face her as she dropped her cloak. Disbelieving recognition warred with a dozen other emotions in his eyes as he finally managed to speak.

"Kimi...?"

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A/N - For those that don't know, Kimi is the name I chose to use for Sesshoumaru's mother, as it was the most common one I found while perusing the net. If you HAVEN'T read my sidestory 'Serenity' yet, I would recommend you do so at this time if you want a better, more detailed look on Toga and Kimi's relationship and its disastrous end as it occurred in my world. It can be found under my author profile at any of the sites I update to (Adultfanfiction, fanfiction dot net, and mediaminer). Of course, it's just a suggestion. I'm probably not going into much detail in 'Pride' over her history. For those of you that haven't and do not want to read the sidestory, I'll sum it up for you real fast. Kimi tricked Toga into thinking she loved him so she could become his mate and gain all the power and wealth that came with being Lady of the West. Toga found out while she was pregnant with Sesshoumaru that she was using him and didn't want to even keep the pup. She held the pup's life over his head to force him to do what she wanted and tried to run off right before she went into labor. Toga drug her back, and banished her from his lands for her betrayal after Sessh was born. He was honorable and provided for her to be well taken care of, but promised her death should she ever return to his lands.

Kudos to all of you that guessed at Kimi's influence and that she was Tsetsukosei's mystery guest of a few chapters ago.

Well, I'm off until the end of the week now, unless I can sneak on in the meantime. I'll miss y'all, but I can't say I can't use a little bit of a break. 120 chapters and all the other stuff in almost as many days?...Heh. Keeping things from going stagnant isn't always easy!


	122. Chapter 121

Pride (In the Name of Love) 121 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Apparently, Jess is not allowed to take breaks and leave things on cliffhangers. Jeez, y'all are slavedrivers...I've been chained to this fic every day for the past four months! XD It truly is a labor of love, though. The only reason I made the time for this instead of curling up in my temporary nest...in the closet....under the table....((yes. For real, thats where I'm sleeping while my room is being painted cause it's the only damn dark and quiet place in the house to sleep during the day...))...Anyway, the only reason I'm writing this despite the difficulties it presents is because one of my devoted on AFF (xLittleBlackStarx) seduced me into it with sweet nothings or something...pfft. Not...that I think this chapter will CURE the cliffhanger...oh well. Don't expect anything else for the next several days though! I really CAN'T.

AND...I know Kenshin has NOTHING to do with this (save for me to shamelessly promote the RK fic I'm now writing on the side that will be posted on all the same sites this one is...hint hint...)...but...seriously, I wish someone had warned me NOT to watch the Reflection OVA when I was done. That...but...it was SAD! It sounded like something I would write, with my love of torturing my favorites...! What a miserable way for things to turn out. Happy ending my ASS...that's my thing. I hurt 'em, but I always let 'em get a happy ending when its all said and done...

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Toga stared in blatant disbelief at his former mate. Kimi watched him with a wide smirk before making a gesture towards his desk. "Sit down, Toga."

A dangerous growl rumbled in Toga's chest as he looked at Sesshoumaru. "I don't know what in the blue bloody hell is going through your mind...give me one reason not to rip you to shreds where you stand! I told you on the day I banished you that to return would mean your death!"

Kimi smirked, idly fingering a crimson orb strung on a long chain around her throat. "Do you REALLY think I'm fool enough to come marching into your castle unguarded without something to hold over you? Know you this, Toga. I have the capability to utterly destroy one of you before you so much as think to lay a finger on me. You cannot move quicker than a thought."

Though it took every last shred of his willpower, Toga slowly sank back into his chair. He couldn't help but cast another worried glance in Sesshoumaru's direction.

Sesshoumaru had slid down the wall to the floor, quivering slightly, his eyes wide and staring in sightless, directionless panic. Toga's growl increased in volume. "What in the hell are you doing to my Sesshoumaru?"

Kimi glanced over and smirked. "Only yours, is he? I seem to recall having a hand in his creation somewhere..."

Toga was on his feet in an instant, claws gouging into the desk as he struggled to physically hold himself from leaping at the infuriating female. "Yes, ONLY mine. You wanted no part of him, in case you do not recall. Whatever you are doing to my son, you best stop NOW...or we'll see if I can indeed move faster than a thought."

"Oh, big words...but they are hollow. You wouldn't risk your precious, precious little Sesshoumaru. Not when you know I could target him as easily as you. You won't take that risk. So sit...back...DOWN. And STAY there. You are not in control of this discussion, Toga. I am."

Toga lowered himself back into the chair, every muscle in his body taut and straining, threads of crimson winding through his eyes.

"That whelp always was your weak point, even before you started fucking him...although that may not be saying much. How long has it been? I'm sure he was a pretty little thing when he was a child, and I wouldn't put it past you...you had to replace me, after all, and my, he did take after me as far as looks go..."

Toga's words were a hiss through his teeth. "Do not think I will tolerate this, Kimi...stop whatever it is you are doing to him and I will discuss whatever the hell it is you want."

"You would discuss it regardless. However, in all honesty, I'm not doing anything to him, nor have I since I arrived. I suppose it's simply a learned response." Kimi's smirk was cold as ice.

Toga stared at her for a long moment. "How long have you tortured my son, you miserable bitch?"

"That's hardly the point, and I need not reveal a damn thing to you. Suffice it to say that I have had my hands in on this matter for some time now. I helped them, they in turn helped me get to where I am at this moment."

"What is it that you want, damn you?" Toga growled helplessly. No matter what, he couldn't deny that Kimi was RIGHT. He wouldn't try anything...wouldn't risk his Sesshoumaru. He was not at all worried about what she could or claimed she could do to him.

"You will surrender the West to me and serve under me. Perhaps even as a consort, should I develop an itch that needs scratching."

"You're mad."

Kimi smirked and jerked a thumb in Sesshoumaru's direction. "No, he's mad. I can assure you I have all my wits about me."

Toga's growl picked up a notch, and he could feel his inner demon screaming for blood. He knew his eyes were pure crimson and his fangs felt entirely too large in his jaws. "You know I cannot just surrender these lands to you. It doesn't work that way! No one would believe you had subjugated me...or my Sesshoumaru."

"That's probably true. However, I came prepared for just such an occasion. Your options are thus. Submit and be damaged so that my claim is irrefutable...or you will be removed. The West is mine. You have already lost, you simply do not realize it yet."

"I have had enough of this!" Toga roared and leapt over the desk in one blindingly fast movement. Kimi's eyes widened in surprise and she froze, too shocked to act. Toga's hand curled around her throat and hoisted her off the chair, slamming her back into the wall. "You betrayed my love. That was unforgivable. You destroyed me, and I exiled you because I loved you still, could not shed your blood. But you have hurt my Sesshoumaru...gods only know to what extent your influence has run. Looking at him, I would assume it is deep. For that, you will die."

Kimi's shock melted into a cold grin. "I really was going to show you something of a bit of mercy, Toga...but you are forcing my hand." Slowly her fingers tightened around the crimson orb at her throat and she managed to choke out a single strange word.

Toga's spine stiffened and some of the red bled out of his eyes as a strange, queasy feeling welled up in the pit of his stomach, slithering through his veins. His grip on Kimi slackened and he stumbled back a step. The room grew dark around him, everything seeming to fade from view. Around him, crimson lines of light suddenly slashed into the floor. They formed a pentagram in which the stunned inu Lord stood straight in the middle of. A circle appeared around the pentagram, runes blazing into life as the room darkened into full blackness. Toga had the strangest feeling of falling, falling...as if the world itself were tumbling away from him. A dim spark of light over his head wavered and then blinked out.

Kimi smiled as Toga vanished, his body seeming to phase out of existence. She felt the caged power as his essence filled the orb in her palm, and a shudder of glee ran through her. She had done it...successfully bound and sealed the most powerful of demons!

She paused for a moment to rub at her throat ruefully before turning her gaze to Sesshoumaru. He no longer looked panicked. His eyes were wide and glazed, staring off sightlessly into the corner of the room, his body laying like a broken rag doll.

Kimi smirked and walked over towards him, catching his chin between her claws and forcing him to look in her direction. "Sesshoumaru. Look at me, precious."

Slowly reality sank back into Sesshoumaru's gaze and he shuddered violently, jerking his head back. As his senses continued to return, his lips twitched into a snarl. Kimi's return grin was dark and cruel.

"Don't fight me, brat. I have sealed your precious 'Lord Father', and if you so much as hint at disobeying me, I can erase his existence with a thought."

"What?...That....It's not possible, you lying whore!" Sesshoumaru hissed, scrambling to his feet and wishing he had some room to back away from this hateful female. The things he had seen...the suffering he had felt over the past few years as a result of her, real or imagined...it was very fresh in his mind.

"Oh, but it is. Pay attention, whelp, and I will tell you how this is going to go."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes dangerously, wanting desperately to lash out but holding back out of fear that she may not be lying...perhaps she was, indeed, telling the truth. Better to confirm that it was indeed the truth than risk being wrong...and his father WASN'T here right now, would never have left him alone with her...

"I am now Lady of the West. All that your father possessed now belongs to me. That includes you. I have uses for you, even if I have no intention of using you as my personal little whore as he did. I do not have the power to hold this title on my own merit. There are other demons that would best me. However...you and your half-breed brother are going to be my personal bodyguards and hold my throne for me."

Sesshoumaru stared in disbelief at the sheer audacity of her claim, a growl bubbling up in his chest. Kimi smirked.

"You may choose to disagree with me...but know that I hold your sire's life in the palm of my hand. Defy me, deny me, and he will be erased. Not simply killed...but truly and wholly erased. There won't be any dashing rescue from the afterlife this time. If this orb breaks..." Kimi tapped the crimson ball with one claw lovingly. "If this orb breaks or is removed from my body, he will be forever lost. His life is bound to mine. Should you kill me, it will have the same effect. Do not think I will hesitate to destroy him."

Sesshoumaru stared at the orb, a muted and nauseous sense of horror gnawing at his gut. His Lord Father...gone?

"So you agree to my terms, brat?" Kimi eyed Sesshoumaru in smug triumph.

"For the duration of my Lord Father's captivity, this Sesshoumaru has no choice but to acquiesce to your commands. Make no mistake...should anything occur to set my Lord Father free, render him free of your control...or he is indeed lost...your life will be forfeit. I will tear out your black heart."

Kimi purred and caught Sesshoumaru's chin in her fingers again, examining him. "Very good. I would expect nothing less. I will trust you to make all the arrangements to assure my ascendancy goes smoothly and meets with no opposition."

Sesshoumaru growled and closed his eyes before nodding stiffly.

"I suppose I have to admit, we did make quite the beautiful puppy. I'm not so blind that I cannot see what all the fuss is about."

Sesshoumaru's spine stiffened and he forced down the bile rising in his throat. Kimi chuckled and patted him on the cheek.

"Don't worry, precious, I have no interest in using your body. Unlike your father, I can find a mate outside of my own House."

Sesshoumaru's tone was tight and clipped. "My Lord Father could have anyone he desired."

"Oh, so sweet...he could have anyone he wanted, but he chose you because you loved him best. Ironic that he always claimed to want someone that wasn't after his power or his status when you yourself have ever sought them, and he chooses you regardless, his strictest competition. But he knows your claws are blunted, doesn't he? That you would never truly try to claim your birthright. The proud and mighty Lord Sesshoumaru...you're nothing but his bitch in the end."

"And I do not regret it in any fashion."

Kimi smirked. "How touching. If you will excuse me, I have some remodeling to do. You would do well to begin informing the appropriate parties...we would not want any...accidents...to occur."

Sesshoumaru nodded tersely and stalked to the desk, freezing in his tracks when Kimi spoke again.

"Oh, yes, by the way...I will be appointing my own general and second in command, and I had someone in mind. You may wish to add it to the paperwork."

"Fine. The name?" Sesshoumaru didn't think he could possibly care any less.

He was wrong.

"Tsetsukosei."


	123. Chapter 122

Pride (In the Name of Love) 122 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I still might be on again / off again for the next few days as I'm still working on getting back into my room...but hopefully it'll be real soon and then I can get on a more regular update basis again.

For anyone that wants a little extra reading...I've broken down to my urges and started a Rurouni Kenshin fic ("The Sharpest Lives") as well. Pride here will still take priority, but...I'll be playing with that in my spare time. It'll be yaoi and...and...well. I don't know. I'm wingin' it...just like I did with Pride, here. LOL...hopefully it won't end up QUITE so long, however.

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Sesshoumaru scowled out the window, distrustful of the moonless sky as he stalked down the hallway towards his brother's room. // Just lovely. How can I keep the hanyou from doing something foolish that will risk my Lord Father's life? I wish I could get him out of this castle entirely. He'd be more help free of this place than stuck in the same sort of bond that I am....but the guards would surely never let him leave the grounds. //

Without bothering to knock, Sesshoumaru shoved Inuyasha's door open. Inuyasha whirled around and gaped. "What the hell are you thinkin', just bustin' in here like that, you ass?"

Sesshoumaru opened his mouth and then shut it before letting out a helpless little laugh, thanking the gods for small favors. "Your human night...!"

Inuyasha frowned darkly and brushed a few black strands of hair back irritably. "Yeah, what of it? You should damn well know I stay in my room when this happens."

"We must act quickly. Tell me, does anyone other than your former pack members or mine know of your human night?"

"No. It's not something I feel exactly comfortable spreading around."

"Good. We have to get you out of here as quickly as possible."

"Eh? What?"

"I don't have time to explain, and I cannot be gone too long. I will contact you when I am able. Dress as a servant, grab your wolf cub...and the monk, priestess, and the monk's daughter if possible...and get as far from this castle as you can as quickly as you can. Do not question me."

"What, finally getting sick of us humans and our--"

Sesshoumaru hissed and grabbed Inuyasha, hugging him tightly before giving him a fierce kiss that left the hanyou's mind reeling. "I never thought I would say this to any but my Lord Father, and I would not expect to hear it again. There is a very real chance I may not live very long, and therefore my tongue will be loose momentarily because I do not wish you to leave under a misconception, especially if this is our final parting, and have no time to mince words. This Sesshoumaru has come to...love you, little brother. Now, for your own damn good and mine, get OUT of here. If you cannot help with this mess from the outside, at least your hanyou blessing or curse, whichever it is, might allow you to be spared. The guards may not recognize you like this and you and your pack may escape. Do NOT ask me any more questions, just GO, and quickly!"

Inuyasha was left gaping like a landed fish as Sesshoumaru turned, hastily heading out of the room.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga growled softly to himself as he sat down cross-legged. He had already paced the limits of his confinement. In the distance...in any give direction, it seemed...he could see a faint point of crimson light. He had traveled towards it and found it led simply to the circled pentagram in which he now sat. His prison was tiny and, it seemed, circular. There was no depth or variance to the blackness...it simply loomed in all directions. Oddly, it did not seem dark - perhaps this circle of binding gave off more light than he had otherwise assumed? He could see himself as clearly as if he was in a well lit room, although he cast no shadows.

More frustrating than a prison he could not change or even beat on, however, was the fact that he could hear Kimi's voice. She in turn could hear him, he knew, although she usually chose to ignore him. // Either that, or she can tune me out entirely. Hn. //

Toga had raged and ranted for a long while when he was first captured, especially when Kimi began talking to Sesshoumaru. When she had mentioned Tsetsukosei, however, his rage had melted into anguished pleading. Kimi was not interested, however, in anything he had to offer her it seemed.

// Curse her, she has me helpless and can TAKE anything she wants...and she intends to hurt my Sesshoumaru solely to hurt ME... showing her mercy in the past was obviously a mistake. //

"Having fun, Toga? You've been silent for some time now..." Kimi's voice drifted in to him, disembodied and seeming to come from all directions.

"What's the point of speaking if you are not interested?"

"Oh, but I was rather interested. I enjoyed hearing you suffer. You're much less fun this way."

"Ungrateful bitch...not only did I spare your life despite all you did and said in the past, I provided you with enough wealth to live very comfortably for the rest of your potentially eternal life...and all you can think to do is seek vengeance because you lost your title...?"

"What good is wealth without power? Some of us are not born so lucky as you. No matter how I strive or how hard I train, my power simply would never be on par with yours. My maximum potential is nothing in comparison to a mere fragment of what you are capable of. Therefore, I had to seek power through...alternate means."

"And so you played me for a fool."

"Well, if the shoe fits...You made it too easy. Who would have thought the impeccable, invincible Lord Toga had emotions that ran so deeply? What sort of demon falls prey to such obvious weakness? To your credit, you hide it fairly well in most matters. No one would suspect the mighty Inu no Taisho was really a big, cuddly puppy dog."

"It is no weakness. In fact, I would claim it to be the opposite. Rather than deny the truth, I embrace it. It has given me strength that others will never dream of. I fight with the full force of my passions behind me, and I am indomitable. When fighting to protect something that you love, your power is much greater."

"Hn. You're a sentimental fool. The power of protecting the ones you love? Don't make me laugh. You're simply powerful, that is all...don't try to make it seem as if you have some secret key."

"How can you deny it outright?"

"Toga, you have no evidence."

Toga smirked with fierce pride. "Do I not? Hm. Kimi, you can not deny my Sesshoumaru's power, can you?"

"I will concede your point as it only proves my own. He IS strong, and he also firmly agreed with my point of view as far as I know. Emotions are weakness."

"Ah, but that's just it. My Sesshoumaru is strong...in fact, I think with equal years and enough desire, he may even have power that bests my own...and yet my hanyou son has defeated him in equal combat more than once."

Kimi snorted. "What is your point?"

"Inuyasha gained no demonic power from the blood of his human mother. It was solely from me, whereas my Sesshoumaru gained power from the both of us. Thus, my Sesshoumaru should surely outstrip Inuyasha in all combat situations...and yet he does not. Inuyasha fights with the full force of his emotions behind every swing of his blade and every lash of his claws. He has fought to protect that which he loves."

Kimi scowled at Toga's logic, unable to deny it. Everything he had said was true - Sesshoumaru SHOULD have been able to wipe the floor with Inuyasha without contest every time...and yet, this was not the case. "I will grudgingly concede this point to you, but I still say one case cannot prove your theory to be truth. Perhaps your blood runs stronger in the hanyou than your true son."

"I will not deny that my blood runs thick in Inuyasha." // Entirely too thick, in fact, the poor boy. At least the Tetsusaiga can keep it under some semblance of control. I never foresaw something like that happening else perhaps I may have refrained from allowing Izayoi to get pupped in the first place... // "I will not deny it, but it runs just as strong in my Sesshoumaru...and he picked up several of the powers of YOUR House as well."

Kimi smirked. "I've noticed...there hasn't been a pup born to my House with venom of his caliber in...I don't know how many generations. My own is entirely negligible, as were my parents and their parents before them. He also seems to have inherited a bit more of our grace to compliment your raw strength."

Toga couldn't help a prideful smile, although it wavered and he was left with a deeply uneasy feeling. // She sounds...proud of him, even though she always claimed to want no part of him. And...how strange that this conversation has ceased to be angry and unpleasant. I'm not sure I'm alright with that. But perhaps seven hundred years is enough to change even someone like her... ah, hell. Why does EVERYTHING I get involved in...ESPECIALLY when it comes to those I choose to mate with...end up so HORRIBLY complicated...? //

Kimi seemed to realize the spin their conversation had taken as well and abruptly scowled. "I have....things to do. You just sit tight there and I'll deal with you later." Feeling somewhat shaken, she abruptly cut her communication with Toga off and stalked out of the room, wondering what it was that was keeping Tsetsukosei.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sairex let out a pained noise as he smacked into the wall, but didn't let the agony screaming up his shattered arm prevent him from lurching out of the way of Tsetsukosei's lashing tail.

"Sit still, you wretched bird!" the dracolich roared in rage, jaws snapping forward and narrowly missing the raven.

Sairex wheezed and clutched his arm, breathing coming with some difficulty. // Damn, he might have got a couple ribs...my chest hurts...hope he didn't puncture a lung. That's all I need... // "Kaa...go boil your tail. You could have dealt vith me peacefully, you know."

The dracolich growled and tried for the hundredth time to wrench his claws free of the stone encasing them. The floor had risen around his feet, liquid-like, and then immediately solidified thanks to one of the raven's spells catching him off guard. "What sort of bloody fool ARE you, Sairexannaras, to think I'd care to make any sort of deal with you? After all the problems you have caused me... I still don't know what it is you were hoping to gain here."

// That makes two of us... // the raven moaned to himself. // I have nothing you want that I would be willing to part with...I just needed to distract you enough to get the kumo out of here with the sword and that damned fluff...but you're making it so damned DIFFICULT...// It took all of Sairex's considerable willpower to remain on his feet. // Kaa, Miroku is going to have my hide when I get back. I promised not to get involved. //

Tsetsukosei growled and crouched before lunging forward with a mighty roar. There was a loud wrenching noise. Three of the dracolich's feet tore free of the stone, and the foreleg that remained stuck was torn from his body. The undead fiend felt no pain, however, and simply dove at Sairex with startling speed.

Sairex's eyes widened and he cursed mentally. // Oh, how badly I misjudged this...Miroku...Aliana...Toga...my friends, my family...I'm sorry that I won't be able to see you again. To end like this after so long... // The raven only had time to let his yellow eyes slip shut before the dragon's teeth clamped around his midsection with enough force to bite him in half.

Or at least, they should have. Tsetsukosei let out a shocked growl as his fangs sank into something fleshy, but it surely wasn't tasty bird-demon flesh. Something vile-tasting, viscous and purple flooded into his jaws instead of the familiar tang of Sairex's blood. A thick, vine-like mass of flesh had surrounded the raven, intercepting Tsetsukosei's jaws. The dracolich jerked his head back in angry surprise, trying to shake the foul stuff out of his mouth.

Naraku narrowed his eyes at the dracolich before smirking. Tsetsukosei's jaws were forced open impossibly wide as the kumo caused the appendage sticking in the dracolich's teeth to grow. There was a splintering, thunderous crack as the demon-beast's jaws snapped apart.

Tsetsukosei reared back with a startled curse that came out as nothing more than a sluggish burst of dark, thick black blood. He hadn't even noticed when Naraku had appeared, let alone expected an attack like THIS!

Sairex shakily backed up a few steps, as surprised as Tsetsukosei was at the sudden rescue. Naraku was eyeing Tsetsukosei thoughtfully and eventually spoke, his tone light and conversational.

"For all the tricks and power you have...it seems you ARE just a demon after all, aren't you?"

Tsetsukosei found speaking with a broken jaw to be impossible, and he reacted with extreme violence as fleshy tendrils started sprouting from Naraku's body and snaking over his own. Naraku smiled almost sweetly, and Sairex's eyes widened to almost comic proportions as he realized what was going on.

"I've been told I'm made up of a mass of demons. I have also learned I can absorb new demons, make them part of my body. Allow me to give you a ... demonstration."


	124. Chapter 123

Pride (In the Name of Love) 123 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I really must be a masochist trying to update TWO fics daily, equally... LOL. Ah, well. It's fun, right? Although sometime Pride here WILL have to end...it CAN'T go on FOREVER.... but there are still things that need wrapping up. I need to hurry and finish it all so I can jump right into the sequel, right? ROFL....oye.....

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Inuyasha had just managed to gather together everyone Sesshoumaru had specified when there was a soft tap on the door. // Shit... // "Who is it? Whaddaya want?"

"Lord Inuyasha? It's me, Rin!"

Inuyasha quickly headed over to open the door. // I didn't THINK Sessh forgot about her when he listed off the humans I was taking, but... ya never know. // "Hey, kid. Eh...what are YOU doing here?"

Rin wasn't alone - she was with Enriki, Sesshoumaru and Toga's attendant. Enriki bowed and his lips quirked slightly. "I owe a debt to your House. I beg you make haste, and I shall explain as best I can. Do not react to anything I say to the guard, merely act as though it is accepted as truth."

Kagome nodded and yawned sleepily. "Right...that mostly means you, Inuyasha. Behave and don't blow up."

Inuyasha glared at the priestess. "What the hell is that supposed to mean? You sayin' I have a temper?!"

Miroku gave him a wan smile and adjusted his grip on Aliana, who was sleeping in his arms and wrapped in a blanket. He briefly thanked Buddha that the raven demons weighed so little, else he would have gotten very uncomfortable very quickly. "You're always the picture of calm, collected serenity, my friend."

Inuyasha snorted, and Kagome and Rin giggled a bit. A sleepy Kouga looked between them and giggled too, since they seemed to be laughing at Inuyasha.

"I do not mean to be rude, but you must make haste, else you will not escape. The orders from above have not fully channeled down to all the guards yet. Lord Sesshoumaru is stalling for your sake at personal risk to himself. Now hurry." Enriki turned and strode stiffly out of the room, soon followed by the pack of humans and the two little demons.

The guards at the door blocked their path, but this was not unexpected. Enriki gave them a dark look. "Why do you stop me?"

"Orders, sir. We are not supposed to let anyone leave the grounds until further notice, sir."

Enriki gave the guard a look of disdain. "You think I am not aware of that order?"

The two door guards glanced at each other skeptically.

Enriki continued. "Do not let anyone leave the castle, and should Lords Inuyasha and / or Sesshoumaru attempt to leave, detain them by whatever means necessary."

The guards nodded. "Yes, sir. Those were the orders we received."

"Do you see either Lord Inuyasha or Sesshoumaru amidst this group of humans?"

The guards inspected them more closely. Inuyasha held his breath, never so grateful in all his life for his human guise. The guards finally shook their heads.

"No, sir. The human miko and monk as well as the Lady Rin and ... another human."

"He is a personal attendant to the humans from this castle. Hikeri."

"The only demons among them are the monk's daughter and that young wolf. What is the meaning of this, sir?"

Enriki snarled. "The new master of the castle has a great distaste for humans, you damn fool! I was ordered to escort them out. As you can see, no one that was specifically demanded to remain within this castle is leaving with them. Only the humans, their attendant, and their adoptive children. I have the order right here, signed by Lord Sesshoumaru himself." The coyote demon flipped a small scroll out of his sleeve and thrust it into the face of the guards.

The surprised guards struggled to read the order and apologize all at the same time, largely tripping over their own tongues. They knew Enriki was in high standing, far higher than their own as he personally attended to the Lords of the castle, and the coyote's orders came DIRECTLY from said Lords. Despite the orders they received from their captains...to go against Enriki might be to defy the Lords themselves.

The guards abruptly stood down and saluted sharply. "Forgive us for detaining you, sir. Please, be on your way."

Enriki snatched his scroll back and gave the guards a dark look before smoothing a few loose strands of hair back. "Thank you. Come, humans."

The small group followed him as he left the castle. At the front gate, they suffered a similar setback but these guards, too, caved to Enriki's demands.

Inuyasha eyed the coyote demon carefully. He had never given him much thought before - Enriki usually quietly went about his duties and avoided standing out. He easily melted into the background and was simple to ignore and forget...which was exactly why he was so useful at gathering information and doing his job.

Enriki was a bit on the small side in comparison to most males, although that did not affect his ability to put even the biggest and burliest of the castle guards back on their heels, cringing. Inuyasha smirked slightly, imagining what a terror the wily coyote must have been before he had been injured.

Enriki's hair was straight and fell just past his shoulders. It was an interesting combination of gray and brown, even a bit of black, identical to the coloring of his pelt when he was in his true demon form. He had a tail to match. His dark eyes missed nothing, and he was prone to smiles that revealed his sharp fangs whenever he was browbeating some unfortunate guard or errant servant.

When they were a good distance from the front gate, Enriki stopped and turned to face Inuyasha. "It is Lord Sesshoumaru's desire that, if at all possible, you all retreat to the Lady Kagome's home for now, as soon as Lord Sairex returns to you. You must not return to the castle."

Inuyasha scowled. "What the fuck is going on?"

Enriki frowned. "I'm not entirely sure what happened. There was some sort of attack, although I am unclear of the details. It likely coincides with the arrival of the female that came to visit." The coyote paused to scowl - he had personally deemed her no threat and escorted Kimi in, after all. "Something grave has befallen Lord Toga. Capture or incapacitation would be my guess, as Lord Sesshoumaru is not consumed by grief."

Several sets of eyes widened as Enriki continued.

"It is my belief that Lord Toga must be being held captive to enforce the cooperation of Lord Sesshoumaru and, likely but to a lesser extent, yourself, Lord Inuyasha. If this has indeed occurred, then the West has fallen to a new Lord...or, more likely, Lady. In an effort to protect you all and get you out of her reach before she can use you against him, Lord Sesshoumaru moved rapidly to remove you from the castle."

Inuyasha scowled. "If this is true, I'm not about to let my brother face all this shit by himself. He's MY father, too, and I--"

Enriki growled softly. "Silence, pup!" The coyote composed himself rapidly. "Pardon me. Lord Inuyasha. But you must obey Lord Sesshoumaru's wishes, at least for now. He will contact you as soon as he is able. He will need help on the outside. I assure you, you will be of far more use if your strikes cannot be easily detected from within and if Lord Sesshoumaru does not have to continuously worry that you are in danger."

Inuyasha scowled and crossed his arms. "Keh...fine. But if we're all in Kagome's ... if we're at her place, how will he reach us?"

"Lord Sesshoumaru says there is an old priestess living in Edo that y ou are familiar with, and he will send messages to her. You merely need to check in with her now and again."

"Alright, I gu-- Miroku?"

Miroku had gasped and was quickly handing Ali off to Kagome before murmuring and snapping sharply through the gestures to open a portal as Sairex had taught him. "Something is wrong..."

Sairex toppled through the portal a moment later, wheezing and clutching at his arm, which had been shattered terribly. Bone jutted through his skin in more than one place. Miroku was kneeling next to him in the next moment, deathly worried.

A moment later Naraku stumbled through the portal. He had Sesshoumaru's mokomoko flung around his neck like some sort of fashion statement. His eyes were glowing a vibrant crimson, and he was twitching. Occasionally, part of his body would bulge or twist as if something was struggling to burst free.

Miroku glared darkly at Naraku, then frowned at Sairex. "You...what happened? You said you were just guiding him..."

Sairex grinned slightly. "He got into zome zort of trouble zo I vent after him...by rights, I zhould be dead."

Miroku's eyes widened. "What?!"

Sairex sighed. "I...got in a fight vith Zetsukosei. I misjudged it very, very badly. I vas trapped and couldn't fight him anymore. I don't have his phylactery and have few zpells dat vould do too terrible much damage to a lich. He vas going to bite me in half, but...vell. Naraku zaved me."

All eyes turned to Naraku in blatant disbelief. The kumo was striking a heroic pose, Tenseiga braced before him and the mokomoko billowing out dramatically behind him. Before anyone could react, the kumo was suddenly directly behind Inuyasha and purring. "Do you love me now?"

Inuyasha yelped and flailed as he put Kagome between him and the grinning kumo. "Creepy bastard...."

Miroku frowned and closed his eyes, galled at the thought of being grateful to Naraku. "Saved you...?"

Naraku sighed. "Well, I couldn't very well let him get eaten. Then I wouldn't have been able to get back here. Purely selfish, I promise. No need to thank me."

Sairex struggled to sit up, and Miroku helped him to do so. "Kumo....Naraku. I need to ask you, very zeriously...are you going to be able to keep dis up?"

Naraku smiled, the red in his eyes flaring more. For an instant, his smile was far too wide, had far too many teeth. "We'll find out."

Miroku frowned, disconcerted. "What was...that?"

Sairex eyed Naraku warily. "He...absorbed Zetsukosei."

"WHAT?!" All eyes went back to Naraku, who was smirking and looked quite pleased with himself.

Sairex shook his head slightly. "It is not zuch a good ting as it zounds. Zetsukosei's phylactery is ztill out dere, meaning da lich cannot be destroyed. If he cannot be destroyed, he cannot be fully absorbed, and he VILL zeek to get out. But for now, at least...ve have him under wraps." The raven paused and looked around, but Naraku beat him to the question.

"Why are we all standing out in the middle of a field by the forest?"

"It is a long story. I'll explain as we travel. Lord Sesshoumaru bid me escort you as far as Edo," Enriki said as he turned to resume their trek.

"Who the fuck said Naraku could come with us?"

Sairex snapped a look at Inuyasha. "Lord Inuyazha, I owe him my life at da moment...and da alternative is zending him back to da castle vith Zetsukosei vithin him. I don't know vhat is going on dere right now, but it can't be good."

"Right. Keep me where you can keep an eye on me...and then I can keep an eye on you, my lovely little hanyou..." Naraku purred.

Inuyasha twitched. "Gimme my brother's stuff...and don't talk to me, look at me, or touch me...and you can come with us."

Naraku did hand over the sword and, more reluctantly, the mokomoko...but then slipped behind Inuyasha and wrapped his arms around his waist, pressing a kiss to the hanyou's ear before Inuyasha could register the act enough to move. "You're no fun..."

"GOD DAMMIT! DONT TOUCH ME! Fucking creepy-ass brain ninja! That's it! I take it back! I'm not going anywhere with you!"

Miroku glanced back towards the castle. "I...don't think we have time to argue right now. They'll be after us. I can't imagine our absence will be entirely ignored for long."

With varying degrees of acceptance, the party resumed their trek. Inuyasha traveled as far from Naraku as possible. Rin struck up a cheery conversation with the kumo, who just as cheerily answered her.

They moved on.


	125. Chapter 124

Pride (In the Name of Love) 124 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Meh. Moving entire rooms full of furniture, books, and random stuff...sucks? LOL. It seems my schedule gets all screwed up when I have a few days off in a row and I can never manage to update properly...Heh. Oh well. I try.

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Sesshoumaru refrained from letting any expression cross his features as he sipped at his tea, sitting ramrod straight in his parlor. His mother sat across from him and was giving him a dark look over the rim of her own cup.

"Do tell me, Sesshoumaru...how is it that all the humans, your brother, and your chief advisor all happen to be out of the castle? Not to mention that Naraku character...oh, and the wolf king."

"A strange coincidence, is it not?"

"Well played, pup. But do not think it will make things easier on you."

Sesshoumaru smirked slightly and countered. "Where is your pet dragon? I would have assumed you would have brought him here in an effort to put me in my place by having the beast forcibly mount me, thus hurting me but more importantly, my Lord Father..."

"Transparent as that motive may seem, we both know it would have been plenty effective."

"Fair enough."

Kimi glared into her cup, however, not appreciating Sesshoumaru's on-the-mark needling about Tsetsukosei's unexpected absence. The dragon had intended to be here almost as soon as she claimed the throne...but now, days later, still had yet to make an appearance or any form of contact.

"You do understand, mother, that it would be foolish for such an event to occur regardless." Sesshoumaru finally stated. Kimi snapped a glare to him.

"Why would THAT be?"

"You and I both know that this Sesshoumaru would not easily allow such a thing to transpire, and even were I perfectly willing, the dragon is a base, brutish fiend. He would damage me near to the point of death in his twisted enjoyment. Now, while I am sure you care naught for my personal wellbeing...as both my brother and father are absent, I am the only one capable of defending this throne. I cannot do so if I am too damaged to stand upright on my own."

Kimi scowled darkly. "Crafty, aren't you..."

"Realistic. The dragon might be able to defend your throne but it would be extraordinarily difficult to explain politically. The attacks and challenges to your throne would grow far greater. There is also the vast turmoil occurring in the south with the passing of Lord Shimaku that has yet to be dealt with....and various other political nightmares. While you may not think you need me...without someone that wholly understands all the workings of this kingdom, it would fall. The West is successful for more than my Lord Father's strength of hand, or my own."

"I suppose you are correct, whether or not I choose to admit it. You have removed every other player from the game that might otherwise have assisted me. So it would seem I do need you after all."

"Make no mistake, mother. I will follow your orders and I will assure that these lands are properly run and not overthrown...but I do not do these things for you. I follow orders for the safety of my Lord Father, and care for these lands because they belong to the same. I do nothing for you."

"Well, aren't you so sweet and devoted. He certainly has YOU trained..."

"Call it what you will. I belong to him, and out of concern for his safety and that which is also his I act. The moment he is no longer in your grasp, no matter the circumstances...nor am I."

"I doubt he appreciates such complete disregard for your own existence..." Kimi said with a dark smirk.

Sesshoumaru shrugged. "All beings have their reasons for which they live and the causes for which they fight and act. He happens to be my own. And thus, you and I are at a stalemate. I can not act against you for fear for him, and you cannot remove him and lose me, else you lose it all."

"Shut up. I deeply dislike you being right."

Sesshoumaru smirked and sipped at his tea. It was not a clear-cut victory by any means...but it was something, at least.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kagome frowned deeply as they neared their destination. Enriki had bowed politely and wished them well before vanishing into the forest once the well was in sight. She was incredibly nervous about bringing Naraku to her world. She fully understood why it was so stupid to leave him behind..but even still...

Rin seemed to have forgiven Naraku his past wholeheartedly - after all, he HAD been nice and good the entire time she'd seen him of late and it wasn't in the girl's heart to hold a grudge - and the two of them had chatted happily most of the trip. Rin frequently was distracted by things...and so was Naraku. // God, it's like having two kids with ADD running around... the ACTUAL kids are calmer than those two. //

Sairex had kept his eyes on Naraku for most of their journey and said very, very little. Miroku had fretted about his broken arm and the raven had allowed it to be treated. It was healing nicely, and the pain had lessened a great deal. It was blatantly obvious that Sairex was not comfortable with their current situation.

"You don't think he'll be able to contain him, do you?" Miroku finally murmured, eyeing Naraku but referring to Tsetsukosei.

Sairex frowned. "I'm not zure. Zetsukosei is old and powerful. But even if he does manage to keep Zetsukosei down, dere is ztill trouble."

"Oh?"

"Da reason dis Naraku is not evil is because a part of his mind vas destroyed. It has hindered his decision making process and his reasoning. Vhile it could have vorked either vay, it zeems to have rendered him zomevhat incapable of zuch tings, of doing tings dat are vicked. Instead of being evil, da vorst dat he can manage is immoral."

"Yes...but...what's this got to do with the other?"

"Zetsukosei might be able to bridge dat gap. Or vorse, overpower him entirely."

Miroku nodded in sudden understanding. "Oh, I see...then we would all be in serious trouble. Naraku's a terrible opponent."

"Yes."

"He seems to be holding him okay for now, though. And much as I don't like having him around, it's better yhan wondering where he could be and what he might be up to."

"I'm also vorried about vhat dat damn lich can ztill zee and learn. Ve know for zure dat Zetsukosei is an enemy. Keeping him in our midst...taking him to da Lady Kagome's home...dis could prove disastrous. And yet...dere is not much ve can do about it. Naraku can't be killed unless he is zeperated from Zetsukosei or da phylactery is destroyed."

Miroku frowned more deeply. "This certainly DOES complicate things, doesn't it..."

"Yes. I..truly do owe him my life. I do not...vish for dis to end in his destruction. I know vhat pain he has caused you in da past, but quite zimply, he is not da zame as he vas once...nor can he ever be again. Unless he is fixed or Zetsukosei does zometing to him...Naraku has changed permanently into da person he's become in da past few years."

"I know. It's .. very hard for me to accept. Truly, it is."

"I can only imagine..."

Kagome turned around as they approached the well. "Well...we're here. Now...I only have a one bedroom apartment, guys. I don't...I mean, I don't know how we're all gonna fit...or how long we need to stay out of the way."

Rin blinked. "Oh. Lord Sesshoumaru gave me this to give to you." The girl beamed and pulled a sack heavy with coin and a smaller sack of gemstones out of her bag and gave them to Kagome.

Kagome stared at the sudden fortune thrust into her hands. "Never mind...I'll just...buy a place. Alright...um...Miroku, Sairex...Inuyasha...you've all been to my home before. You'll have to keep an eye on your respective kids. Most human children don't have pointy ears, wings, or tails...or yellow eyes...so...er...yeah. It'd be a little suspicious if they started running around and someone noticed them."

Miroku grinned. "Gotcha."

Inuyasha flattened his ears back. "That scrawny wolf ain't my kid, and I'd have drowned him at birth if he was."

Kagome smirked a bit. "Eh, well, you're the one watching him for now, so just grit your teeth and bear it. As for you..." Kagome turned her gaze to Naraku and sighed. "I can't say I trust you and I'm not very comfortable bringing you home."

Naraku waved a hand dismissively. "Yes, I'm aware, I'm the raincloud on the parade. I won't cause any trouble, and won't run amok outside and draw attention to myself. I'd much rather follow Inuyasha around, anyway."

Inuyasha twitched and then whirled on Naraku, storming over to him "I've had about enough of this. You KNOW I have a mate and I'm not at ALL interested in you, right?"

Naraku slowly peered around Inuyasha to look at Kouga, who was chasing - or being chased by, it was impossible to tell - Aliana in circles in some sort of game of tag. Kouga was much faster, but Ali delighted in leaping over his head and landing a good distance away. Her wings weren't strong enough for flight or even gliding, really, but they were enough to give her some serious added distance on jumps. All in all, the two were pretty evenly matched.

"I didn't realize you were quite THAT twisted, my pretty little hanyou..."

Inuyasha twitched. "You damn well know Kouga's not supposed to be like that. I'm TAKEN. I'm not INTERESTED in another mate, even if I DIDN'T hate you."

"You say the cruelest things, love."

"WHY ME?!"

"I can't help it. Your ears are adorable."

Inuyasha twitched. "It's always the damn ears. Always. Of all the fuckin'...I'd cut em off if I didn't need em...HEY! Wait!" Inuyasha jabbed a finger accusingly into Naraku's chest. "If it's all about the ears, then why were you after me when I was human?!"

Naraku purred. "I didn't say it was ALL about the ears..." Glowing crimson eyes raked down Inuyasha's body. The hanyou suddenly felt as if he had been stripped, fondled, and ultimately violated and left in a heap on the ground. "Shall I enumerate the reasons?"

"You ..y-you...just stay away from me!" Inuyasha barely refrained from the urge to cover himself with his hands and scurried towards the well.

Sairex squinted at the chuckling kumo before leaning over towards him. "Are you...REALLY interested in Lord Inuyazha that way?"

Naraku smirked. "He makes it so much fun, it doesn't matter anymore if I am or not." Naraku leaned over and nudged Rin. "Can I have some of those...?"

Rin smiled and handed over some of the flowers she had gathered. "Sure!"

Naraku immediately headed towards Inuyasha. "Inu-darling, I have something for youuuu!"

"GAAAAAAAH!!!"


	126. Chapter 125

Pride (In the Name of Love) 125 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - The sheer size of this thing is starting to amuse me. My computer's pretty snappy, but its starting to take forever to load this story...of course, the file is, at the start of this chapter....11.94 MB in size, 535 pages, 300k words ... wow.

In other news... Jess wants to make a new website. Jess is willing to pay fees for the privilege of having said website, but Jess does NOT know any html. I had a website before that was all geocities drag-and-drop editing, which I can handle... so I want something that is simple enough to make and edit all by myself. Having someone make a site for me is all well and good, except for the fact that I want to be able to update things on my own. Since Geocities is going away... does anyone know any alternatives for someone like me?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Kagome secured everyone in her apartment under Rin and Inuyasha's supervision, since those two knew the most of the way things worked in her world. She didn't think there would be too much trouble - with the exception of Sairex and Miroku, everyone was focused intently on the cartoons playing on the television.

Sairex had fallen asleep leaning against the monk, more exhausted than he cared to admit. He hadn't had much proper rest since his fight with Tsetsukosei, and with the drain on his reserves that his healing was taking...he was, simply, beat. Miroku had an arm hooked around Sairex's waist and his eyes closed, but whether or not he was sleeping was impossible to tell.

Kagome then made a few phone calls and dressed in her most impressive-looking business attire. When she left the apartment building, it was with an elaborate story and a full police escort.

Simply put, Kagome claimed to have decided that it wasn't entirely wise to keep some of the Higurashi's shrine treasure on the premises anymore. She was simply turning it over into modern currency and putting it in the bank for security reasons.

After she had her money safely in the bank - several hours and a LOT of paperwork later - she went and purchased herself a gorgeous, fully-furnished flat. It was far bigger than what she would ever need for herself...but, really, now that she was a millionaire she figured she might as well splurge a bit.

Kagome returned to her apartment near evening. Miroku and Sairex were sleeping contentedly right where she had left them. Kouga and Aliana were both asleep on the floor, limbs askew and in positions that could not POSSIBLY be comfortable. Rin was still happily watching TV. Inuyasha...

Inuyasha had his back plastered to the wall, ears flat against his skull, and looked almost as if he were trying to press himself back THROUGH the wall - quietly, so as not to wake up anyone who was sleeping. Naraku was sitting on a couch nearby and attempting to convince Inuyasha to come sit next to him, smiling sweetly.

"Hey, guys..."

Inuyasha fled behind Kagome in relief, his voice a hiss that wasn't missed by anyone who was awake enough to care. "Kagome, he's doing it again!"

"Doing what?"

Naraku rolled his eyes. "I merely asked if Inuyasha would come join me to watch this interesting box-thing of yours."

"I was sitting on the couch and he dropped into my lap!"

Kagome rolled her eyes and bit back a chuckle, patting her friend on the arm. "Well. I have a new house now, and a car will be coming by to pick us up in about half an hour. I'll deal with moving all my stuff over there soon. Dinner is going to be delivered in about two hours. So...we better get everyone awake and ready to go."

Inuyasha, having a purpose, put thoughts of the terribly lecherous Naraku on the back burner and went to start waking up the kids.

Kagome walked over and nudged Miroku gently. "Hey...Miroku...wake --eep!"

Without so much as fluttering an eyelash, Miroku reached out and grabbed her, pulling her into his lap.

"Let me go, you lecherous monk!"

Sairex blinked open his eyes in sleepy surprise at Kagome's sudden appearance and protest. Miroku was mumbling something, and although it wasn't entirely clear, he seemed to be informing Kagome that everything was fine, she was more than welcome to touch it...

Kagome squinted at Miroku dangerously. Sairex held up a hand, matching her look. "I got dis."

Miroku awoke with a startled yelp when he got slapped. "I didn't mean it! I'm sorry, I'll pay doub--... er... oh. Hmm." He slowly rubbed his cheek and grinned. "Hm. I think I fell asleep... Kagome, what are you doing in my lap?"

"That, monk, is a FANTASTIC question..." Kagome gave Miroku a little glare and struggled back to her feet.

"Isn't it..." Sairex murmured.

Miroku blinked and looked over at Inuyasha pleadingly. The hanyou shook his head. "Sorry, monk. From where I'm sitting, you MORE than deserved that one."

Sairex sighed. "Vell, at least you're faithful to me vhen you're avake. I'll take vhat I can get."

"Hey now, I can't help what I dream. It just happens."

"Vhich is vhy ve are villing to forgive you. Kaa, you really are a lech..."

"Sorry...Something about this room..." Miroku's eyes innocently traveled to the couch...then the floor...then Kagome...and then settled on Sairex. Sairex remembered very well what had happened last time he had been in this room with Miroku and he blushed brightly. Kagome blushed just as much and rapidly stalked away from Miroku, busying herself getting ready to try and avoid thinking about it. Miroku smirked.

Inuyasha shook his head as he scooped up Kouga, who seemed to have absolutely no desire to end his nap just yet. "I don't even want to know."

After a bit more fussing and rearranging, as well as some disguising of demonic attributes, the group was finally ready to head out.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hah, he's got you pretty good, doesn't he?"

Kimi growled and slammed down her teacup almost forcefully enough to break it. "Shut up, Toga."

Sesshoumaru had only just left to tend to his duties as if nothing major had taken place and it were just another day.

"Well, the way I see it...I may be stuck with you, but that means you're stuck with me as well. You can ignore me all you like...but really, I have nothing better to do."

"I can end you."

"And, like my Sesshoumaru said, end your rule of the West in one fell swoop. My pup is not possessed of as much compassion as I am. Make no mistake, he will kill you or die trying. This is not a threat, merely a statement of fact."

"I know."

Toga sighed heavily. "Kimi...why are you doing this..?"

"You took everything away from me!"

"You damn well lied to me to get it in the first place and broke my heart to boot! You were going to KILL MY SESSHOUMARU before he even drew breath!"

"Well, I... I was...oh, shut up! You're my prisoner!"

Toga frowned deeply. Something wasn't quite right here. Accepted at face value, Kimi was doing terrible things, saying terrible things, and acting wholly wicked...but her heart didn't quite seem to be in it. When suddenly faced with the place she had called home for a long time, the mate who had cherished her even if she thought she had no feelings for him whatsoever, the pup she had been convinced she never wanted...

Toga shook his head. // Am I just trying to see the best in her because I never wanted to believe she would do those things? Hn. I don't know. I've faced true evil before and... well. She isn't quite it. I'm not convinced that her heart is as wholly in this as she claims. // "Kimi?"

"What do you want?"

"Tell me something?"

Kimi growled. "Fine."

"It will not help or harm you in any way to answer me honestly, I am simply curious. How did you come to be involved with Tsetsukosei in the first place?..."

"It's not any of your business."

"You have something better to do than talk to me right now?"

"Keh...fine. He contacted me and promised me personal vengeance and the West if I would help him with things on the outside about three years ago."

// That means she wasn't involved from the start...just from my Sesshoumaru's last capture. Good. // "And of course, you had been stewing about finding a way to strike back at me for a long time...."

"Of course I was! And then you ... you died, so I couldn't get much revenge then. I didn't even know you were back until that damned dragon told me."

Toga rocked back on his heels, surprised at her hesitation. // Well, I'll be damned... I think I was right... // "How is it you were involved in the torture of my Sesshoumaru?"

"What does it matter?"

"It matters. I am...curious."

Kimi didn't answer immediately, seemingly thinking about whether or not she should answer at all. Finally, she did. "I didn't actually do much of anything. A creepy, spindly-limbed wretch by the name of Jormandar used my image amidst some rather elaborate illusions because he got the idea out of S...the whelp's head that deep down, he had some issues in regards to me." Her expression and tone were neutral.

Toga blinked a few times, settling back down...although inside, he was floored. // If she is playing me now, I'm as big a fool as she says...but is it possible that she might have...changed?...Seven hundred years IS a long time, and gives a lot of chance to evaluate your life...I need to...look into this further. I do not know if I can forgive her any of it...and Sesshoumaru surely will not...but I need to know. //


	127. Chapter 126

Pride (In the Name of Love) 126 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Jess still wants to make a new website. Jess is willing to pay fees for the privilege of having said website, but Jess does NOT know any html. I had a website before that was all geocities drag-and-drop editing, which I can handle... so I want something that is simple enough to make and edit all by myself. Having someone make a site for me is all well and good, except for the fact that I want to be able to update things on my own. Since Geocities is going away... does anyone know any alternatives for someone like me?

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Inuyasha was more than a little miffed. Not only was he pissed off, he was pissed off at the simple fact that he was pissed off. In fact, the more he thought about it, the angrier he got. It truly was a vicious cycle.

It shouldn't be this way. Gods, no, he should be celebrating and leaping about, throwing flowers in the streets.

But he wasn't. He was sitting, glaring at the serene waters of the pool in Kagome's yard, ears flat and a growl in his throat as he tried to validate his current situation, make it anything other than what it would look like the the casual observer.

What had caused this nasty little scenario?

Naraku had dropped him flat. The kumo had been hounding him at every moment, flirting and going completely over the top in efforts of seduction, saying things that ranged from being so horrifically sappy Inuyasha was sure his teeth would rot to things that would make even the most veteran hooker blush and cover her ears. And then, within the span of a few hours, Naraku had lost all interest in him. Completely.

It wasn't that Inuyasha was sad to lose the crazy kumo's attention - never that. Ugh. Gods, no....but some part of him was suddenly, inexplicably jealous. He had gone from being the seeming central focus of Naraku's world to not even being a consideration, and that in and of itself was bothering the poor hanyou. He caught himself wondering what had happened to suddenly make him so undesirable, who else had caught Naraku's glowing red eye, and what made THEM so much more special.

Inuyasha leveled his glare at Naraku. The kumo was dressed in a pair of black shorts and shades and laying on a chair-shaped raft, idly sunning himself as he drifted around the pool and looking quite content. He had taken to this new world and its marvels with great pleasure. He had a pair of headphones in his ears, listening to some music Kagome had shown him, and a couple wine coolers in the drink-holders on his raft. Yes, the kumo was livin' it up. Inuyasha growled low in his throat, trying to form his hatred and malice into a tangible ball to hurl across the water at this horribly frustrating creature.

With none of his usual duties to tend to, Sairex too was taking advantage of the warm sunny day, stretched out on a chair with wings skewed out, a blissful smile on his face. Miroku apparently found his mate's enjoyment of the sun to be amusing - either that or he liked the chance to ogle the pretty raven's exotic features in between keeping an eye on the kids.

Kouga and Aliana were playing some sort of game that only the two of them seemed to fully understand the rules of, although it seemed largely based on the premise that Aliana was a great and powerful monk that was going to exorcize Kouga...and Kouga was the dashing and powerful wolf king and was going to exorcize her right back. It apparently involved a lot of splashing.

Inuyasha couldn't help but feel a bit guilty, as well. Everyone seemed to be enjoying themselves...but really, that was half the problem. Gods only knew what sort of torments his brother was going through right now back home while everyone here was playing and enjoying the nice summer day. // I know there's nothing we can do regardless, but still.//

Naraku cracked open one eye to regard Inuyasha, the contented smirk never leaving his lips. His plan was working perfectly...which amused him to no end. // I never suspected that the hanyou would REALLY get jealous at the lack of my attentions. Perhaps I should evaluate the raven's question more carefully. AM I genuinely interested in him or is it merely a game?... I suppose I wouldn't mind a romp or three, if it came to that. // Naraku peered over his shades at Inuyasha for a moment before flashing a big, white grin and settling back down to enjoy his sunbathing. // Regardless of that...maybe I should woo the priestess instead and live here in THIS world...I so could get used to this.... //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru let his first genuine smile in days slip when Enriki finally showed back up at the Western Castle. "This Sesshoumaru is pleased that your mission was successful. I thank you."

"Think nothing of it, my lord."

"They all reached their destination safely?"

"Yes, my lord. We picked up Naraku and Lord Sairex on the way as well, as you assumed we would."

"Good. I thank you for the risks you have taken. It was above and beyond what could be considered your duty."

Enriki grinned. "I owe my life to you and your Lord Father, Lord Sesshoumaru. Assisting you is not only my job, but my pleasure. Besides...it was good to get out of the castle. My duties as an attendant are not quite so demanding as my former duties as a military official and I rather miss the action."

"Miss the action? I've seen you dress down more than one of my guards in your current role..."

The coyote chuckled. "Ah, well. Old habits die hard, as they say."

Sesshoumaru was silent for a long moment before getting down to business. "It is unfortunate that Sairex is absent. The raven is good with trinkets and things of a mystical nature, and I would dearly love to know if my Lord Father's life is truly bound to my mother's, as well as the limits of what I can do without risk to him."

"Of course, simply testing the theory would be foolish, but I am not sure how much information we have on the subject of binding demons. Binding and sealing demons is not generally an art that demons practice."

"Ironically, my Lord Father was fairly skilled at sealing demons and would know where we would need to look."

"So what is our course of action? Do we attempt to steal this gem he is bound in?"

Sesshoumaru shook his head vehemently. "No. We will do absolutely nothing at all that may bring risk to my Lord Father. If it comes to it, I am prepared to make any personal sacrifice necessary."

"Ah. That is why you wanted those close to you out of here where you could not reach them..."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Yes."

"The Inu no Taisho would not be pleased were you to give your life for his. Your absence was very hard on him, Lord Sesshoumaru. He was the walking dead and cared for naught."

Sesshoumaru frowned. "If it comes to it, Enriki, as a last resort. I have no desire to throw away my life for those very reasons. But if it becomes a choice of one of us or the other...there is no contest for me, no decision that need be made."

"Let's try and focus on a less...ah...grim solution, shall we, my Lord?"

"Yes, of course. Have you any thoughts?"

"I am sure you have gone over this extensively in your own mind, sire. However, the noted lack of your mother's dragon minion is...a point of interest in which I can enlighten you."

"Oh? Please, go on..."

"I learned, whilst escorting the party to Edo, that the kumo Naraku has consumed the dragon."

Sesshoumaru's eyes flew wide, his shock great enough to slip the impassive mask he had let slip back into place. "What?!"

"I speak truth, my lord. It seems the raven and the dragon were in some fashion of combat. In order to save the life of Lord Sairex, Naraku fought off and absorbed the dracolich. Sairex voiced some concerns over whether or not the kumo will be able to contain him fully...but for now, at least, this Tsetsukosei has been removed from play."

A grin flickered across Sesshoumaru's lips. "This is very good news. Mother will not be pleased...although I am not sure if it benefits me to keep this information to myself for now or if I should use it....I suppose I will wait at least a short while."

Enriki nodded. "Ah. Yes. Also, my lord...I have acquired your mokomoko and the sword Tenseiga, courtesy of the same kumo. I left them in a secure location just outside the castle gates, as I was not sure you would wish such things in the presence of your mother."

Sesshoumaru mulled it over for a moment. "Surely, I shall reclaim my mokomoko. As for the sword...I do not believe my mother will make the effort to strip me of weapons, as I need to defend these grounds against all comers. It may therefore be safe for me to retrieve. While the blade is worthless to fight with...the protection it will offer me personally should she attempt to harm me will prove beneficial. Escort me to this place."

"Yes, my lord."

"Enriki...a word of advice."

The coyote inclined his head, arching an eyebrow. "My lord?"

"Stay away from my office unless I contact you, and make a point of publically offering opinions that hint at disloyalty and dislike. I shall overlook them, of course. It is best, however, that my mother not think we are close or that you are a particularly agreeable or important minion, for your own safety."

Enriki nodded. "Very good, my Lord. I will make a point of being overheard grousing about something or other, have no fear."

"Yes. Now, I wish for you to summon the wolf pack's lieutenants, Ginta and Hakkaku, to my office immediately."

Enriki wrinkled his nose slightly in distaste - the coyote and wolf tribes were long-standing enemies. "With all due respect, my lord, Ginta and Hakkaku are bumbling fools."

Sesshoumaru nodded slightly. "It seems so on the surface...but when it comes down to it they are intelligent enough to hold their tongues and not quite the idiots they seem. But their intelligence aside, their loyalty to Kouga is unquestionable and unshakeable. On pain of death, neither of them would betray him. It is long since time that the wolf pack was informed of their leader's...unfortunate accident. While I have no desire to cause any power struggles outright, the two of them can act as though under Kouga's direct orders without causing much suspicion and have the pack obey until a better solution can be found."

"Very good, my lord, I shall see to it that they are summoned henceforth. Is there anything else you wish of me?"

"Not at this time. Let us go to retrieve my things." With that, Sesshoumaru and Enriki headed for the castle gates.


	128. Chapter 127

Pride (In the Name of Love) 127 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - This...is an author's note. I'm sure something wonderful should go here, but...alas, I have nothing of import to say. Of course, I'll remember something I should mention as soon as I send the chapter out...oh well....

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Ginta stared slack-jawed at Sesshoumaru. "Wh-what?!"

Sesshoumaru sighed. "You heard me. Your king suffered an unfortunate accident and has been rendered a child again. It is, of course, imperative that those in your tribe that would cause trouble upon hearing this knowledge must not be made aware of it...but also, too, something must be done else they will go suspicious at his unannounced and continued absence. We are working to correct this issue."

Ginta and Hakkaku exchanged glances before nodding. "What do you want us to do, Lord Sesshoumaru?"

Sesshoumaru frowned and steepled his fingers, thinking. "I know you two are loyal to Kouga, and so I can trust you will not do anything that might harm him or his position."

Ginta nodded. "And letting the elders know he is unfit to lead would assuredly harm him. We won't say anything."

Hakkaku scowled. "But what is it you want us to do?"

Sesshoumaru considered for a moment before speaking. "I do not enjoy the concept of bringing others into this conflict, nor do I wish for word to spread. Therefore, I will be placing a good deal of trust in you. If I find this trust to be abused, I assure you, you will not live to regret it."

Both of the wolf demons straightened up and nodded seriously. Sesshoumaru continued.

"With the capture of my Lord Father, the West has been overthrown." Sesshoumaru closed his eyes. It was more painful to say those words than he cared to admit. He heard Ginta and Hakkaku's startled intake of breath, and his eyes snapped open. "My mother is now in charge of these lands and I am merely a puppet until I find a way to free my Lord Father."

"So...what do you want us to do?" Hakkaku asked hesitantly.

"You two will serve me and keep the army under my control. I will arrange to speak with your elders and inform them that Kouga is on a personal mission for me. Should anything come up that should normally require his attention, I will deal with it personally. You two were appointed by him and myself to voice my orders and his in his absence."

"I see..."

Sesshoumaru sighed. "I do not know much of the inner workings of your pack. Essentially, you both are to answer to me regarding the issues of castle and border security...but until Kouga's return, you will act in his place as alpha of your pack. The elders will assume your orders are from Kouga and will not grumble too loudly."

"But...but we can't take over Kouga's position!"

"Yeah, we couldn't beat down ALL the others..."

"You won't have to fight for it at all. You merely need to keep the act up until we can get him back to normal. Also...you are to follow any orders given by my mother, but you are to inform me of them as soon as possible...or send a discreet messenger should you be unable to come in person. Ultimately, I cannot let her have full control of my army. I am putting you two in a dangerous position...but it is the only one I can come up with that will allay suspicions as to Kouga's whereabouts as well as keep him in charge with as little turmoil as possible."

The two wolves saluted smartly. "Yes, sire."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Good. You are both dismissed. Do not come to me unless it is an emergency. I will be trusting you to keep the wolf pack under control."

Sesshoumaru smiled slightly after they left and lightly stroked his mokomoko. Oh, but it felt so good to have it back... // Those two aren't as stupid as they act half the time. Between them they should be able to keep the wolves at bay, and they are loyal enough that I should be able to keep the military under control WITHOUT their general or Inuyasha and without drawing attention from my mother. Good. One problem down. //

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kagome had ordered Chinese takeout for dinner, and it proved to be a smashing success. After dinner, she announced that she was going to be heading to the mall - they would need some things if they were all going to be living together for an unknown amount of time. Rin automatically offered to help, and Kagome was more than happy to take her up on that. She looked towards Miroku, thinking a second set of helping hands would be good, but was surprised when none other than Naraku volunteered.

"Well...I kinda figured it'd be easier if just us human types went..." Kagome hedged.

"The only revealing feature about me is my eyes, my dear priestess, and you have given me these sunglasses already to cover them. I otherwise appear human. I assure you, I will cause no trouble. I simply wish to see what else this world of yours has to offer."

Kagome - and Inuyasha and Miroku - were all about to deny that Naraku should go anywhere without someone around that might stand a chance against him in a fight, but Naraku got a surprising vote of support from Sairex.

"Eh, take him vith you, Lady Priestess. He vill not cause you any trouble."

Inuyasha squinted at Sairex. "You know that that is, y'know, Naraku..."

"I'm avare of dat. However...I'm going to draw my own line in da zand about dis, zo to zpeak. Da Naraku you all know of days gone past is gone, and cannot return. It is literally impossible, unless I vere to restore da gap in his mind."

Naraku shrugged a bit. "And I have no desire to have that gap restored, regardless. I am...largely content. I feel as if life has become much simpler and more enjoyable."

"Vhile it is true dat his absorbing Zetsukosei remains zometing dat ve need to keep under careful observation...even vere da dragon to rise, he could not do it yet. He is veakened from our fight. Zo let him go and enjoy da vorld a bit, and quit harassing him zo much for da tings he did in his past life. He now has a lesser capability for evil dan any of us."

Inuyasha opened and shut his mouth a few times before sighing. "Yeah, fine..." Slowly he glanced over at Naraku. "I...am sorry for being so...rude...lately. I guess."

Naraku eyed Inuyasha for a moment before handing his glasses to Kagome. Before the hanyou could react he swooped over and wrapped his arms around Inuyasha's waist, lifting him off the ground in something of a twirl. "I knew you didn't hate me!"

"I CHANGED MY MIND! PUT ME DOWN! GOD DAMMIT!"

Kouga squinted at Naraku and then walked over. The kumo let out a startled yelp as he suddenly got bitten on the back of his calf. He dropped the squirming hanyou and looked down at Kouga.

The angry little wolf glared up at him. "Mine!"

Several sets of eyes blinked in unison, although before anyone could laugh, Kouga received an angry slap from Aliana.

"You can't!"

Kouga squinted angrily and rubbed his cheek. "Why not?"

Aliana pouted, tears welling up in her big yellow eyes. "Cause...cause Lady Rin said girls need to grow up and marry handsome princes and...and...its all in the book! You have to marry me!"

Kouga blinked. "But...but you cant marry me! I hate girls!"

"The book SAYS SO!"

Inuyasha turned to look at Rin. Rin blinked, eyes wide. "She's right...girls are supposed to grow up and marry handsome princes and live in fabulous castles and live happily ever after." Rin paused to consider this. "I suppose Lord Sesshoumaru is technically a prince, even if we call him Lord instead..."

Ali nodded smugly. "And you're the only one my age."

Kouga frowned. "But I'm not a prince, I'm a king and kings are better."

Inuyasha twitched. "I don't know if I'm supposed to laugh until I cry about this or get all defensive that someone is trying to steal my mate..."

Miroku leaned over and nudged Sairex. "What do a raven and a wolf make, exactly?"

Sairex blinked and then shook his head. "I'd really rather not tink about tings like dat any time in da next...er...five or zix hundred years, at least, if dat's all da zame vith you."

Kagome chuckled and just shook her head. // God...what a crazy, mixed up bunch of friends I ended up with... and I wouldn't trade them for the world. // "Alright, alright...hehe...Naraku, you can come with Rin and I. We'll bring back some clothes and some stuff for all of you, alright?"

Inuyasha scowled. "Why can't I go?"

"Because you never keep your hat on and I don't care to explain why you have puppy ears. Besides...that red thing you wear all the time sticks out too much...and so does your hair."

Inuyasha looked deflated, and each word make him more and more resemble a kicked puppy.

Naraku smiled. "Inuyasha, you take it the wrong way. Your appearance is exceptional and you stand out amidst the generally boring human populace. You are stunning, and because of this, you draw attention that you may not want and that is not good for being stealthy."

The hanyou blinked a few times before squinting at Naraku, but the kumo's tone hadn't been teasing or at all condescending. Mollified, Inuyasha flopped down on the couch. "Fine...but you better bring me home some of that iced cream stuff. I never get any when I'm here. Everyone else steals it first."

Kagome laughed. "Alright, I promise. Take care, and we'll be back as soon as we're done. Miroku, I'm leaving you in charge."

Miroku blinked, then grinned. "Right. I'll make sure none of these unruly demons gets too out of line."

Inuyasha snorted and grabbed for the television remote. "That'll be the day..."

Kagome shook her head and ushered her shopping companions out the door.


	129. Chapter 128

Pride (In the Name of Love) 128 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Ugh. My muse is being horribly uncooperative the past few days... I've felt my last few chapters have been drivel. That goes for BOTH of my fics that I'm attempting to update. Maybe I need to do something more philosophical and deep.

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Clothes shopping came first for the trio. Money was no longer an object for Kagome, and she was more than happy to indulge herself and Rin. Rin's eyes lit up when she found a particularly striking red dress, which Kagome urged her to try on. When she finally came out, Kagome gasped and Naraku flashed her a grin.

"Oh, wow...with the right hairstyle, you could knock any man dead with THAT dress..."

Rin blinked. "Rin does not want to knock anyone dead..."

Kagome giggled. "That's not what I meant."

"She means you look absolutely ravishing. Sesshoumaru wouldn't stand a chance...you'd melt Lord Icicle's resistance in about two seconds."

"You think so?" Rin examined herself in the mirror, blushing a bit. She felt almost indecent - this dress was NOTHING like ANYTHING she had ever seen on anyone in her world.

Soon the girls had all the clothes they could possibly want - at least for the moment - and had even picked out about a dozen outfits that they thought Aliana would look absolutely adorable in. That completed, they went shopping for the boys.

Even Kagome had to admit, when Naraku finally got done dressing in some more modern clothing, that he looked absolutely stunning. In general, she had to admit to rather liking the kumo these days. He was mischievous and his continual flirting with Inuyasha was truly hilarious. It was hard to think of him as the very same horrific creature that had caused them so much grief in days gone by.

// And he CAN'T be evil like that again. It's strange... // Kagome eyed Naraku thoughtfully. "Say, Naraku..."

"Yes?"

"What can you tell me about...what Sairex did to you? I mean, I know you're different than you used to be and its kinda hard for us to accept. You were our biggest enemy."

"I know. As for what he did to me...hm. He'd be the one to ask, not me. From my perspective...it's like this. If I try to think about something too hard...or try to think too far ahead...my head starts to hurt. Eventually, it hurts enough that I can't think at all, or I simply lose consciousness."

"Huh. So how does that prevent you from being evil?"

Naraku smirked. "With all due respect, my dear priestess...being evil takes more effort and focus than being good."

"I can't say that I agree with that."

"Really, it does. When you're evil, truly wicked...not only do the would-be heroes hunt you down, but the average citizen passively or even more actively attempts to thwart you. To be evil and powerful is a constant battle of wits...a web of carefully woven fear to subdue the weak, and cunning and strength to dominate other challengers. Only one can be the most powerful...but the most powerful can be subdued by proper cunning, as was Lord Toga. You have to constantly and consistently be several steps ahead of those that would save others from you, else you will fall."

Kagome paused to think about that for a few moments. "It isn't easy to be good, either...attaining things and reaching goals through pure means can sometimes be very difficult. Earning respect and the rights to some things can be much more difficult than seizing it. Evil contains the seeds of its own destruction by its very nature."

"Not necessarily. While I will concede that some things are easier stolen or savaged, holding and maintaining your victory is another matter. When you fight on the dark side, even your allies are likely to betray you. You have no true confidants, no true comrades. You are ultimately alone. Everything must be done yourself, and you must take extreme care not to let even your minions know too much. You cannot allow yourself to be swayed by greed or deluded by power. You must be entirely and acutely aware of your capabilities at all times, and must not make a mistake. Should you err, you will not get the chance to correct it without a good deal of luck...and luck is fickle and unreliable. If you err, your so-called allied and supporters will tear you down before your enemies get the chance. So in this regard, yes, evil does contain the seeds of its own destruction...but only if you allow yourself to become complacent, foolish, or too trusting of anyone."

Kagome gave Naraku a half-hearted smile. "Heh. Y'know, that sounds just like the you I was used to."

"Perhaps. But it is an entirely moot point. I am incapable of the mental functions that would allow me to become great. I could mindlessly run around smashing things, but I would never attain any great power or be anything of a mastermind...simply a minion, and that holds no appeal for me. I can't plot anything much deeper or more intricate than what I intend to eat for dinner without my mind shutting down on me. I suppose, perhaps, it should irritate me that I lack the ability for deep thought...but I can't say I mind. My life has not been bad of late."

Kagome grinned. "Well, that works for me."

"I... cannot fathom why, but I am strangely and strongly drawn to you. I find myself often confused, with inexplicable urges that do not seem like something I should yearn for."

Kagome paused, mulling over that for a moment. Naraku had a serious look on his face, a slight frown on his lips. His eyes were shielded by the shades she had loaned him earlier, but it didn't take away from the gravity of his expression. "Well, I don't know how much you remember. You were originally a bandit by the name of Onigumo. You were injured horribly, burned and broken. A priestess by the name of Kikyo was attempting to care for you, to ease your final days and you came to love her...and if not truly love her, covet her."

Naraku watched her seriously, hanging on her every word.

"You traded your body to a horde of demons in exchange to be able to move and live again. That is when you became Naraku. You...weren't a true demon, though. You still had human in you...you were a hanyou, like Inuyasha. You tried mightily to rid yourself of your human heart and with it your love for Kikyo."

"I do not...see how this pertains to you, though...even if it does explain a lot of things I've wondered about."

"Heh...I'm Kikyo's reincarnation. She could be my twin sister."

"Oh. Well. It all makes sense now." Naraku grinned. "Thank you. I'm far less confused now."

"Glad I could help. Now...I DO have to ask you about Inuyasha."

"Jealous?"

Kagome chuckled. "Nah, not exactly. I'm just looking out for him because he's one of my dearest friends and I don't want to see him get hurt. Nothing personal. But you do know that, no matter what he says, he has a mate that he loves dearly?"

"The 'scrawny, flea-bitten wolf'? Ah, yes, I hear the affection in every growl and slash of their claws colliding."

Kagome giggled. "Eh, that's just how they work. Despite what they say and how they act, they really do care about each other. From what I gather, they're both strictly loyal, too. Kouga has told me before that the wolves mate for life, and loyalty is something Inuyasha has in spades despite his other faults."

"You all take me so SERIOUSLY...look. I tease the hanyou because it is fun. I flirt with him because truly, I would not mind a little fling, even if I do not expect any such thing. I do not intend to cause trouble for him or his mate. I just get...lonely. I can understand that no one really wants me around because of who I was and who I would be, were I not damaged. It isn't like I don't get the point. I surely don't expect it to change overnight, if at all. I would have left a long while ago so as not to bother you all had it been allowed. As much as I'm not wanted around, nor can I be allowed to roam free. The only one that truly understands that I can no longer be the threat I once was is Sairex. That is also largely able to be contributed to the fact that he has no prior knowledge of me. He doesn't have the long and tumultuous history the rest of us have."

Kagome found herself feeling guilty despite it all. "Well...look. It's alright. People change, I know. Even if your change was forced, you aren't who you used to be. I'm sorry that we've all been...treating you like nothing changed all this time. It's hard to get over the things you did."

"Like I said. I understand. I deserve it in any case. We can...stop having this conversation now. We have a lot of shopping to do and I think Rin is going to break your bank account if we don't leave this clothing shop soon."

Kagome glanced over and found that Rin had added many new outfits for herself and her friends to the cart and was currently browsing through a rack of flower-patterned sundresses delightedly. "Yeah, I see what you mean..."

They brought the bags out to the car rather than haul them about for the remainder of their trip simply because of how many there were. Kagome couldn't help but giggle as they walked throughout the building. Naraku was dressed to kill in one of his new outfits and his shades, and had one girl on each arm. The three of them were DEFINITELY turning heads.

Kagome decided a snack and ice cream were in order and the three of them sat down to enjoy their treat. It took a very long time for Rin and Naraku to decide what they wanted. The waitress alternated between drooling over the kumo and looking at him and Rin skeptically, confused as to why something as simple as the menu seemed to be utterly flabbergasting the two of them.

Kagome saved the day by simply ordering him a hot fudge sundae, and Rin decided on a strawberry one herself after a bit of urging from Kagome.

The kumo had no idea what to expect, and when his order arrived, he stared at it for the longest time. Kagome bit back a giggle - she would never get tired of her friends and their reactions to things that were so commonplace in her life.

Naraku took a bite and froze, staring at the treat. Kagome watched him curiously, blinking when he suddenly leaped to his feet. "Wh..." Her words stuck in her throat as he took a knee and clasped her hands in his own, his tone deathly serious.

"Lady Kagome, marry me. I cannot leave a world with things so wonderful as this behind. I want to stay with you forever. Please, say you will..."

Kagome didn't really know how to react, and she abruptly broke into a vicious blush as other people in the restaurant started cheering and whistling and applauding. "Naraku!"

The kumo couldn't help but flash her a grin. "What?"

"I more or less stopped living here to live in YOUR world, y'know..."

"Well, you're clearly insane. Do you SEE that thing on the table?" Naraku pointed at the sundae. "LOOK at it..."

"So you want to marry me because I bought you dessert?"

Naraku considered it for a moment. "Well, I suppose there might be other benefits."

Kagome rolled her eyes. "I think I preferred it when you were chasing Inuyasha..."

"I don't think he looks as good in a skirt as you do."

Kagome and Rin both giggled at that. Rin eyed Naraku seriously. "Where did you ever see Inuyasha in a skirt?"

Naraku smirked and tapped his temple. "In here. Trust me, it's a scary place." With a chuckle, the kumo slid back into his seat and lost himself to the bliss of his sundae.


	130. Chapter 129

Pride (In the Name of Love) 129 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So. Mental soundtrack for Naraku last chapter? "Sharp Dressed Man" by ZZ Top. XD

And I must thank some of my recent reviewers for giving me some good ideas...especially Nyko-chan, you really gave me a good one... I love you guys.

Sorry for the delay on fanfiction dot net, its been down for me all day and now, much later, it STILL is down. Otherwise, my delays are largely due to the fact I just worked three days straight and it was crazy busy and kicked my ass...and sleep won out over sticking around and writing.

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// Do you not desire it? I can grant you power beyond anything you ever imagined. //

// I don't need it, though...and I don't really want it. //

// How can you not want it? Would you rather I slowly rip you apart? I am PERFECTLY willing to go that route. //

// Shut up and just...die or something. //

// You're growing soft. //

// I'm not. I was strong enough to subdue you, anyways...so what does that say for you? //

// You bloody FOOL, I'm willing to DEAL with you rather than just DESTROY you, and you deny me? For what? They do not care for you, in fact, do not even LIKE you! You owe them nothing. You were enemies forever and that will not change, no matter what new leaves you turn over. You cannot redeem yourself, they will not allow it. If that damned whore hadn't stripped your brain, you would even now be questing for their blood or reveling in it! //

Naraku twitched, wishing very much that he could just make Tsetsukosei SHUT UP. The dracolich was enraged at his continued captivity and had woken him in the middle of the night in a cold sweat. The fight to subdue the beast had been brief but brutal. It was not something Naraku had ever had to deal with before. He had absorbed resisting demons before, of course, but once he did their individual sentience and minds would vanish, evaporate and meld into the collective under the power of his central mind. They would submit to the control of his 'hive' mind, so to speak.

Tsetsukosei was entirely different. While he had been able to more or less sap the beast's strength and keep his flesh bound within his own body, the dracolich couldn't be killed and therefore couldn't be wholly absorbed. He was very much still alive and active and ANGRY at his continued captivity. Subduing the beast once was one thing. Having to continually enforce his will and endure surprise bursts of strength was something else entirely. And, as Sairex had cautioned...Tsetsukosei was old and frightfully powerful.

Worse, some of the things the beast was saying was striking chords deep within the kumo. Confusion gnawed at his brain. He... he DID want to stay like he was, surprisingly. He had dim and incomplete memories of his dark conquest and... somehow, this crippling blow Sairex had struck him had healed him in ways. He found he actually DID desire companionship. While being feared was nice...there was something very nice about NOT being feared. It was frightfully pleasant not to be alone, not to be watching his back at all times... to laugh and joke around.

Of course, it was distressing that he could not think too much on anything, no matter if it was good or ill. He basically was forced to live a simple life bereft of any real goals.

// I wonder...if I had another chance, and my mind was healed... if I WOULD revert to the dark side or if I could... could stay. //

Tsetsukosei cut easily into his thoughts. // Don't be a fool. Even if you DID possess the desire to be different in full possession of all your faculties, their trust in you, slight though it is, would be instantly and irrevocably shattered. The only reason they tolerate you now is because you are shackled and incapable. //

Naraku scowled. Incapable...well, he was.

// Make no mistake, kumo. I WILL get out of here and I WILL destroy you. I have given you your chance to treat with me, but you deny it. //

Naraku winced as Tsetsukosei assaulted his mind again, although this time it wasn't in an effort to escape...just an effort to hurt him, make him suffer for daring to thwart him in any way. In that instant, Naraku made up his mind and jumped out of bed.

// What are you doing, kumo? //

// Getting rid of you the only way I can! // Naraku ignored the subsequent insults as he pulled on a robe and then made his way down the hall.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kagome blinked sleepily at the knock on her door and looked towards the clock. // 3:32 a.m.... what's going on? // "Just a minute..." she called out, getting up and squirming into her robe. She pushed her bed-mussed hair back from her face and opened the door, peering out blearily. "Naraku?"

Naraku frowned. "I... need you to help me."

Kagome yawned. "It couldn't wait until morning?"

"Perhaps...but perhaps not."

"What's going on?"

"The dracolich I have contained is attempting to free itself. I am concerned that I may, indeed, be unable to prevent his escape."

"I think Sairex might know a little more about him than me..."

Naraku shook his head. "No. I know what needs to be done. The chance of us finding his phylactery and destroying him before he can break free are practically nonexistent. He will not be caught off guard so easily again. I only succeeded in taking him because he wasn't expecting it. We have this one chance, right now, and to squander it would be foolish."

Kagome peered at him with a sigh. "What do you want me to do?"

Naraku squared his shoulders. "Purify me and the beast with it. He can't be killed, per se, but he is a demon. Eradicate him."

Kagome's jaw dropped. Sure, she had harbored a distinct desire to purify this very demon more times than she could count, but...it was different now. Especially after spending the day with him as a friend... she was a forgiving sort, and it no longer sat well with her to think of Naraku as a terrible enemy. "Naraku, I... I can't do that."

Naraku frowned, finding it difficult to hear her over the sudden rage in his mind as Tsetsukosei had a bloody conniption. "You have to! This thing needs to be destroyed and I... well. I'm an acceptable sacrifice. I'm sure any of your friends would agree." This last was said a bit more bitterly than the kumo intended.

"I won't."

"I'll attack you and force you into it in self-defense if you do not. If you do not eradicate me, then I shall continue to do so until you do."

"Then why haven't you already? It would have been far easier than coming here and simply asking me. You knew I would say no."

Naraku was silent for a long while. "I cannot hold this thing forever and I don't think you'll like it when he either overwhelms me and I fight you then, or breaks free here in your world. Regardless... I do not wish to attack you. I was hoping I could logically convince you to do what needs to be done."

"I won't do it. There has to be another way, and we'll find it."

Naraku was about to debate the point when Tsetsukosei withdrew abruptly, recoiling far back into his mind. The kumo paused, curious. What was the fiend up to now?...

The dracolich surged forward abruptly in a tremendous rush of power. Naraku let out a strangled, choked noise as he lost immediate control of his motor function, hitting the ground hard. Kagome gasped in surprise and alarm and kneeled down next to him in concern. A shuddering convulsion, almost a seizure ran through Naraku. His eyes flared, pupilless and crimson and glowing like twin bloody moons. The kumo's body jerked helplessly as he waged a mental war.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

// Curse you, Naraku, let me GO! I will not let some pathetic human girl destroy my body just because YOU found some sense of morality in your bloody incapacitation! //

// Stand down, you wretched thing! I will NOT let you go and if it requires me going down with you to take you down, so be it! //

// You never would have felt this way previously... the same thing that makes you weak is what is making you ridiculously stubborn about all this. You WERE so delightfully twisted. //

// Sorry to disappoint. Stand DOWN, damn you! //

// I will not! If you intend to keep me, so be it, but I will not allow this to continue as it is! // Naraku felt the dracolich ripping into his mind. The kumo fought with all his mental strength, but couldn't get a solid grip on the slippery fiend.

His body jerked sharply as Tsetsukosei found what he was looking for...the gap in his mind, the ragged cut Sairex had inadvertently made in their desperate struggle earlier. With a triumphant growl, the dracolich reconnected the kumo's mind.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Naraku blinked several times, his body slowly relaxing. Kagome was kneeling over him, her concern evident on her face. The priestess let out a sigh of relief as the dark power surging about within the kumo slowly settled back down, retreating and becoming quiescent again. "Naraku?"

Naraku sat up slowly. It felt vaguely like waking up from a long and convoluted dream. Memory was flooding back into him at a shocking rate. Everything was so much clearer, made so much more sense... how could he have ever, ever found his incapacitation to be enjoyable?

Slowly, his eyes locked on Kagome. He found himself surprised that, with the return of his mind, that all the things that had happened in the interim still had the power to affect him.

// So I have changed after all. // "Kagome."

Kagome heard the change in his tone - it wasn't the lazy, almost always amused drawl that he had affected of late. "Are...are you alright?"

"I am not sure how to answer that question...but I can promise you a painful death should you take me up on my prior plea of purification."

// Uh-oh... // Kagome frowned deeply. This... sounded more like the Naraku she remembered of old. "You...your mind has been..."

"Yes." Naraku continued to roll thoughts through his head, pleased at his regained ability to fully process his thoughts.

"So...now what?"

Naraku paused for a long moment, mulling it over. He was surprised at his own answer...and so, apparently, was Tsetsukosei. "I would...like to keep things as they are. I will not suffer the indignity of remaining a prisoner...but I do not desire conquest. I..." Naraku's tone was surprised and sounded almost as if he felt he was admitting to something shameful. "I think I would like to have you as...friends."

Friends. The concept was so foreign...but these past few years had changed him. He had been a wily bandit and been overwhelmed by demons...his dark nature had shown him no path save conquest, blood, and pain. But of late....living with these people, sharing in their lives and realizing that maybe he, too, could have something more...

Perhaps there was a different course his life could take, after all.


	131. Chapter 130

Pride (In the Name of Love) 130 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Hooray, fanfiction dot net seems to be working again! Now I can get a little back on schedule. Tomorrow's chapter (as in the Tuesday edition of Pride) may not occur until late, if I manage to get it out on time at all. I work early shift . So I'll not have time in the morning and I'll be exhausted by the time I get home and may end up just falling asleep. Just fair warning.

I want to promise y'all that even if the updates slow down a tiny bit (like every other day on occasion instead of every day) it's not because I'm losing interest in my writing. No need to panic. I just...sometimes have interference that makes it tough to keep up with EVERY SINGLE DAY...hehe. Anyhow, love y'all. Hope you enjoy the chapter, even if it's a bit of a controversial issue if my past reviews are anything to judge by.

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Things were not going according to plan. Kimi frowned deeply as she settled down into Toga's throne in the empty audience hall, not bothering to light any of the lamps against the dark night. The darkness suited her mood.

Nothing had turned out like she thought it would. She had spent the better part of five hundred years resenting Toga, blaming him for all that had gone wrong in her life. If she insisted it enough, she could almost bring herself to believe it at times - better to blame Toga than to admit that maybe she had been wrong, been at fault.

How could she have been wrong? Her and her so called 'friends' had all fought for the inu Lord's attentions when he had announced his intention to take a mate. Kimi had put on a convincing act of love, which she had told herself was love for power and wealth, which Toga had more of than any other.

Maybe it had been at some point...but everything had fallen apart at the seams since then.

She had truly resented the inu Lord for reasons she couldn't quite name, and truly she had not wanted any part of a pup. She felt she was still far too young for motherhood. She was probably right.

Her exile had only reinforced her irrational hatred of Toga. Every report she had her minions gather over the years only served to incense her further, fuel her rage. Her rage lasted for half of a millenia.

And then Toga had died, protecting his new mate and his just-born son. The mightiest of demons had died for them. // Would he have died for me? // Kimi frowned and fidgeted uneasily. She knew the answer. Toga would have given his life for her without a second thought. He who had everything valued her above all else, and she had known it.

It was impossible to take another mate. She had tried. But every time ended with her snarling and viciously discarding whatever male she had lured in, haunted by distant memories of sunfire-gold eyes and a strong embrace, whispered words of possession and devotion.

With Toga's death, her anger had waned, replaced by a lump in her throat that just didn't want to go away. It had been horribly difficult to admit to herself that she was feeling regret. While she still tried to grasp at her feeble self-righteous anger...she knew it was all just a lie.

She had fallen in love with him anyway. She had simply been too foolish, too swayed by the seduction of power and wealth to realize the whole truth. It had taken five hundred years of growing up and his death to understand the whole truth.

And then she heard rumors of his resurrection after two hundred years...and then the rumors were confirmed. Kimi had been entirely unable to figure out how to handle the news. She put up an angry front and tried to convince herself of it's truth...but she had never really managed. Her rage at him was hollow, just a cover for something deeper that she couldn't shake.

And then...her pup. Sesshoumaru. // Or should I say, Toga's pup...hn. It's always 'MY Sesshoumaru' with him... // Somehow, though, that thought didn't irk her as much as she would have expected it to. Dear gods, she didn't know WHAT she expected from Sesshoumaru.

Coming here to this castle was the first time she had seen him in anything other than the dim lighting of Tsetsukosei's dungeon, battered and dirty and ragged to the point he was practically unrecognizable. It had been easy to think of the unresponsive thing hanging on the wall as less than alive...not real. Even at the times Sesshoumaru WAS lively, he was little more than an animal, gnashing his teeth and raging against his bonds...mindless.... or babbling things that made no sense as insanity gripped him tighter and tighter.

Despite the fact that she knew she had played a role in his torment, she herself had not actually DONE anything. Half of it was fueled by Sesshoumaru's lunacy and the rest was Jormandar. While Tsetsukosei was a master at physical torment, Jormandar was much more insidious. The dracolich had been plenty content to allow the puppetmaster to have his bit of revenge, crafting intricate illusions and playing with the inu's mind.

But now it was different. She was seeing him as he was normally... not as a crazed, animalistic prisoner. He was beautiful and graceful. From what she could tell, his mind was frightfully sharp as well. Kimi had the distinct impression that he was smarter than either of his parents and figured Toga wouldn't argue. The thought brought the tiniest flicker of a grin to her lips. // Hn. Toga never claimed to be super-intelligent, of course. He never needed to be. Not that he's stupid, by any means... //

Kimi frowned darkly as she thought more on Sesshoumaru's cunning. Her pup had been steadily and slowly turning the tables on her and all her plans since she arrived. He had effectively made it so she could not contact the outside world in any fashion, she could never actually get through to any of the military officials...or other palace officials, for that matter. Sesshoumaru had smoothly announced his father's absence and the turnover of the throne...and yet, he had done it in such a way that he still looked like the authority of the West. Oh, sure, everyone TECHNICALLY recognized her and she had all the power that went with the title...but it was clear that everyone considered the House of the Inu no Taisho to be in charge, ultimately.

Kimi swallowed thickly. Her pup was truly impressive...and he was strong. Gods, he was strong. She knew without doubt that he'd match or surpass his father when he had enough age and growth and experience to match him. Even now...she wouldn't stand much of a chance against him. That realization was made so much worse by the simple fact that he had stared her in the eyes and promised from the bottom of his heart to kill her. She had no doubt whatsoever that Sesshoumaru meant it. There was no mercy or compromise in the flat announcement, no hint of compassion or forgiveness in the cultured purr of his voice.

// So now what do I do?... // She closed her eyes with a heavy sigh. It had been easy to hate her enemies when they were faceless, less than real... when she wasn't standing in the quiet halls of the place that had been the best home she had ever known...when her prisoner wasn't the only male whose love and devotion ever mattered and her would-be assassin was none other than their son.

// I've been so damn stupid. I thought I was so smart, so cunning...I was just a stupid pup myself. I thought all that mattered was being as impressive as the other ladies at court. My 'friends'. Hah. I thought all that I needed was power and wealth, and that it didn't matter what I had to do to get it. I'd just put on my little act and fool the stupid male...how was I supposed to know he was so... wonderful? I guess I was just expecting a bored Lord looking for something pretty to hang off his arm in exchange for sharing his title. I didn't think he'd LOVE me. I didn't think he'd... he'd treat me like a real queen and cherish me and...fuck. //

Kimi angrily wiped at the treacherous tears threatening to spill over. // And I know if I had EXPLAINED to him that I wanted to wait a bit on having a pup he would have understood. I was too much a damn child myself. And now it's too late to change, with all I've set in motion. But regardless... I don't think I can go through with this. //

Kimi lifted the crimson orb around her neck and sighed before reaching into it with her mind.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"Toga."

Toga's head lifted slowly and he winced as his bones popped. He hadn't moved in a long while. Sleep did not want to come in this strange sub-realm. Nor was he hungry or thirsty...he was simply preserved in near stasis. "Eh? Kimi?"

The female inu was silent for so long that Toga began to wonder if he had simply imagined it. Finally, however, she spoke again. Toga was shocked at the pain and sorrow in her tone. "I'm sorry."

"Wh...what?" He really couldn't believe he had heard her right.

"Oh, damn it, don't make me repeat myself! I'm sorry, alright? I screwed everything up. I was a spoiled brat and I used you. I said and did some terrible things, and I'm sorry. I'm...sorry that I hurt you."

Toga's eyes were wide as he stared into the endless dark of his binding. This was unexpected...but could it be true? Was it a lie? Was she attempting to manipulate him again? "I see."

"I know you have no reason to believe me, and I don't care. I'm not going to say it again, I just wanted you to know."

Toga paused for a long moment. "Kimi, if you're truly sorry, then let me out of here. Things don't have to be like this. I'll let you go, no matter the validity of your apology. Even if it is simply a lie, I do not care." He was silent for a long moment before sighing heavily. "Despite how badly you hurt me, forcing you out of my life was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. I loved you, truly I did. You broke my heart, and it killed me to push you away. But I had to."

"I know. You ... were right to do so. But I can't let you out of here, Toga."

"Why not? You said yourself that you have regret."

"YOU may be forgiving enough to allow me to walk away with my life, Toga, but Sesshoumaru is not. The moment you are out of my grasp, my life at the very least is forfeit. I don't think even you can stop him."

Toga frowned. Kimi was probably right. "I should be able to stop my Sesshoumaru long enough for you to get away."

"What if I don't WANT to get away?"

Toga blinked and sat back. "What?"

"You heard me. I don't... I don't really expect a second chance or anything like that but I don't just want to run off either, not with things...being left like this. Though it really blows my mind that you have a... a physical relationship with our pup, if the rumors I heard were true."

Toga growled softly. "He is my sole mate and marked as such. The rumors you have heard are not unfounded, but nor is it popular knowledge and for political reasons we have kept it a secret."

"Your MATE? You can't be serious...!"

"Oh, I'm VERY serious."

"You...you MARKED him? Toga, I know you were...were lonely and hurt when I left, but..."

Toga cut her off. "Do not dare to presume anything in regards to our relationship. I did not enter into it out of desperation or a sense of loss. The truth of the matter, which you may have failed to yet realize, is that my Sesshoumaru is an absolutely remarkable creature. He is intelligent and cunning, a master of diplomacy and political wrestling. He is graceful and powerful, a terror in combat and light-footed enough to walk over dead leaves in the fall and make no noise. He is unquestionably beautiful. His heart and mind have ever been...carefully guarded things. No one else has had opportunity to know him as I have. I have seen him laugh and cry, pull pranks and joke around. He is a complex puzzle and does not ever express his wishes that are unrelated to business in anything resembling a straight fashion. If you blink or don't pay attention, you miss it. But he trusts me enough to be open. For all of these reasons and more, I came to love him. The fact that he is my pup remains an... unfortunate complication. I never made any such move on him prior to my death. Whatever else you or the others may assume, I did struggle mightily with the fact that he was my son....but I loved him too much to care."

Kimi was silent, unable to form a proper response. She felt a sudden spike of jealousy that surprised her at Toga's passionate declaration. She could hear the protective threads in his voice, just DARING her to challenge him or his choice of mate. // He once sounded like that about me... //

The inu female shook her head angrily and shut down the connection before slumping back in the throne, pretending that there weren't tears of hurt and frustration leaking from her eyes. // What in the fuck do I do now?... I can't let him go and can't proceed with the plan. Damn it all... //


	132. Chapter 131

Pride (In the Name of Love) 131 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Headache...so painful. Early shift...also painful.

My Fanfiction dot net reviewers - if I don't reply for a bit it's not for lack of trying. FFnet is still screwed up. They were down the other day, and now half the reviews I get it says I cannot reply to them, for I am not the author. *sigh*

A special review reply - Liera, luv at joo. Lol...didn't expect you to review since you, y'know...chat with me...but it made me smile anyways.

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When breakfast time finally came around and everyone filtered out of their respective rooms, they were rather surprised to see a bleary-eyed Kagome warily watching Naraku across the table. The kumo was paying her no real attention, absolutely fascinated with the morning newspaper and a tall glass of tropical fruit juice. Kagome took it upon herself to more or less herd everyone in to the table before pushing down the top of Naraku's paper to get his attention.

Naraku hiked an eyebrow at her, then noticed that everyone else was there too. "Ah. Good morning."

There was a general round of responses - a bright and cheery good morning from Rin and the kids, neutral responses from Inuyasha and Miroku, and an almost pained groan from a very sleepy looking Sairex.

Kagome shifted a bit, nervously. "Guys, ah...something happened last night and we felt it best that you knew..."

Miroku blinked. "Oh my...shall I take the children out of the room?"

Kagome blushed violently and Naraku smirked. "Well, I did attempt to propose marriage yesterday but she refused to answer. Otherwise, your suspicions might have been well-founded."

"Oh, shut up, Naraku..."

"That might make it hard for me to tell them what you wish for me to tell them."

Kagome rolled her eyes and lifted her cup of coffee...then slid it over to Sairex. "You look like you need it more than me."

Sairex muttered something about mornings and sniffed at the strange brew.

Naraku sighed. "I wish for you all to know that my mind has been fully repaired and I am back to running at full capacity."

Everyone paused to gape at the kumo in varying degrees of alarm.

"I...also have no intention of going back to life the way it was once. The sacred jewel is gone, and that was always the heart of our disputes. I have since learned several life lessons and how life could be besides the one I had previously made for myself. Even if you will not accept me as a friend or acquaintance, I am not your enemy any longer."

Sairex narrowed his eyes. "How did dis change come to pass?"

"Suspecting a different reaction from me, the dracolich within me bridged the gap you had created within my mind."

Sairex nodded a bit. "I zee..."

Naraku smiled. "Raven, I would have a word with you in private."

Miroku grabbed Sairex by the arm with a dark look at Naraku. "I think you can speak your piece here."

Naraku arched an eyebrow. "Very well, I shall remain here. But my words are for him alone."

Sairex gave Miroku a reassuring smile. "No vorries." The raven made his way a short distance from the table. Naraku followed and leaned in close, whispering softly into his ear. Sairex's expression ran through a vast myriad of emotions before he finally jerked his head back to stare at Naraku. "Dat...just...might vork. Very vell. I vill accompany you."

Miroku scowled at Naraku. "Where are you going?"

"Ve must make haste back to da Vestern castle. Lord Inuyazha, ve must leave immediately. Zhould dis vork...ve vill not only get rid of Zetsukosei, but free your father as vell."

Inuyasha blinked slowly. "And you trust that slippery bastard?"

Naraku rolled his eyes. "As a security measure, I will allow the raven into my mind. Should I try to pull anything, it will be a simple matter for him to destroy me. Besides...do you not think it wise to get me out of this future time, much as I love it? If I am a risk, think of all the trouble I could cause here."

Inuyasha sighed. "Fine. I'll bring you two there...but this had better be good."

Naraku smiled. "Trust me...it will be."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Kimi paced back and forth in agitation. It had been almost a full day since she had offered Toga her apology. She now didn't know what to do. She wanted to prove herself good to her word and release him...but she valued her life and knew Sesshoumaru would be very quick to claim it the moment she did.

She started when she saw a raven with glowing yellow eyes perched in one of the windows. "Eh? Shoo!"

The raven cawed at her mockingly before flying into the room and landing on the floor, its body twisting and stretching back into Sairex's typical humanoid form. Naraku had retaken his normal size and shape as well and stood next to him.

"Eh? Who the hell are you tw-- wait. You're..."

Sairex nodded. "I'm Zairex, chief advisor to Lord Toga and his House. Dis is Naraku."

Kimi wrinkled her nose a bit. "You speak strangely."

Sairex scowled, staring at Kimi with mixed emotions. This was the female who had been Toga's first mate... the first to bear the mark he himself would have likely borne should things have gone differently...and this also was the female that broke Toga's heart. "Da vay I zpeak is not da matter at hand here. Naraku and I have come for Toga."

"You're to the point, aren't you?" Kimi frowned, wondering if she could use this. "Do not take this as blatant refusal...but should I refuse to relinquish him to you, what would you do?"

Naraku smiled like a knife, eyes glittering crimson, and Sairex's expression was just as full of malevolent promise. "I vould kill you. I vould have raised arms against you already had you made any efforts to assault me. I vill not allow you to hold Toga any longer."

"I don't want to."

Both Naraku and Sairex blinked, their respective determined rage fizzling a bit at the unexpected response. "You don't?"

"No. But I value my life. While I do not think Toga will kill me, were I to let him go at this time...Sesshoumaru will."

Naraku smiled, his voice a purr of liquid silk that sent shivers down her spine. "That may be true, but if you refuse to release him, we will kill you now. You are better off to take your chances with Sesshoumaru."

"If I break this orb, Toga is lost forever!"

Sairex's glare was sharp. "You lie. I may not be able to perform any zuch zpell of binding myzelf, but I know da vay dat dey vork. If you break dat orb, Toga vill be freed...but it is a good threat to use vith dose dat do not know better. However...ve do not vish for you to break it. Cooperate vith us, ve let you live. Deny us..." Sairex's words trailed off and suddenly blazed into her mind, a painful discordant ache accompanying the words that were roughly deposited in her mind. // Deny us and I vill destroy you from da inside out. //

Kimi shuddered and clutched at her ears, although the action was pointless to stop the painful mental intrusion. "Alright! Just...just tell me what you want me to do and for the love of all that is holy, keep Sesshoumaru AWAY from me!"

"For da duration of our visit, I vill. Naraku, please zeal da door, den come and lay over here."

Naraku did as he was told, stretching out on the rug in front of Toga's throne. "Hm. This rug is rather comfortable."

Kimi frowned. "What....what do you want me to do?"

"Put da orb on his chest and stand back. All I require of you is dat you do NOT interfere vith dis. I have no intention of harming you as long as you comply."

Kimi reluctantly did as she was told before settling down into the throne uneasily. She had no idea what these two were up to, but she could sense the power the two of them held and seriously doubted that she could best them.

Sairex glanced at Naraku, his expression very serious. "If you betray me in dis, Naraku, I promise you dere vill be absolutely nothing left of you zave da pieces I keep vithin myzelf to torment eternally."

Naraku eyed the raven levelly, appearing unmoved by the deadly promise in Sairex's tone and appearance. "I have no cause to betray you in this. It is for my benefit as well. Without the inu, I will lose a great deal of the influence I need to begin a proper new life."

Sairex snorted. "Kaa..." The raven glanced to Kimi in amusement. "If Zezzhoumaru zhould come upon me vith vhat I'm about to do, he'd probably have my head as vell as yours. Believe me, I von't let him in and I von't be zticking around for a vhile."

Kimi eyed the raven, suddenly suspicious. "What are you...going to do?"

"Make a little...svitch."

"Switch?"

Sairex didn't answer, already lost in a quiet chant. One hand was resting on the orb and the other was resting over Naraku's heart. The kumo's eyes began to glow and his body bulged strangely, although it wasn't entirely obvious what was going on.

Naraku's body suddenly jolted sharply, and the orb began to glow a violent crimson. As Naraku's back arched off the ground, the colors in the orb intensified and the thing began to vibrate rapidly with a faint, crystalline whine.

And then, as suddenly as it began, it was over. Naraku relaxed and Sairex carefully, hesitantly lifted the orb. "I tink it vorked..."

Naraku's eyes opened...and they gleamed a familiar shade of sunfire-gold. The voice he spoke in was not his own. It was Toga's. "What the...Sairex?"

Sairex glared at Naraku. "Zpit him out, kumo, or I'll make good on my threat."

"Mm...think of all that one could do with the legendary Inu no Taisho imprisoned in their body..." Naraku's voice had retaken it's customary wicked purr, and his eyes resumed their typical crimson color. "The power I could possess..."

Sairex hissed dangerously, and Naraku sighed.

"You're all so impatient." The kumo extend his arm, which bulged weirdly as it elongated and grew, touching the ground. Eventually the kumo's flesh retreated, leaving a rather dazed and disheveled Toga laying on the floor.

Inside the orb, Tsetsukosei howled madly. The switch had been successful.


	133. Chapter 132

Pride (In the Name of Love) 132 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - So...I'm not sure where I'll have a website, but I'm sure that I will. I can find artwork of the standard Inuyasha characters all day long...but I want to find some pics of Toga. A MUCH more difficult feat....so...if anyone has any or any exceptionally awesome / cute pics or ani's of the others, email them to me! =D

On another note...I never intended this chapter to turn out like it did.

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Toga slowly stood up, although his equilibrium seemed a little off. Having one's body condensed and drawn through a small space, into another creature's body, and ultimately channeled through and spit out was a bit disorienting, to say the least.

Sairex checked him over before nodding. "Vell, you zeem to be in one piece."

Toga nodded. "I am." His gaze slowly shifted over to lock on Kimi. His expression was unreadable. "You have very little time to get out of here."

Sairex glanced at her. "If you are leaving, I vill escort you personally."

"There is no need for that, Sairex."

Sairex turned to look at Toga incredulously, one eyebrow hiking. "Do you REALLY tink Lord Zezzhoumaru is going to take too kindly to vhat I just allowed to happen?"

"I can take care of my son."

Sairex's eyebrow arched. "Oh? No offense, Toga, but I don't care to ztake my life on dat."

As if on cue, there was a solid THUD against the door, although Naraku's barrier held.

Sairex sighed. "Vell, he's faster dan one vould tink, isn't he?"

Toga glanced towards the door. "Let him in."

Kimi repressed the sudden and powerful urge to hide behind Toga as Naraku shrugged and calmly dismantled the barrier. The door exploded open barely a split second later and Sesshoumaru burst into the room. For the moment, at least, he had eyes for no one but Toga. "My Lord Father!"

Toga calmly strode forward. Sesshoumaru stopped a few feet from him and then took a knee, bowing his head, trying hard to reign in the eager quivering in his muscles. "My Sesshoumaru." Toga returned the greeting before hauling Sesshoumaru up and into his arms, giving him a tight hug. The younger taiyoukai blushed but did not refrain from burying his face in Toga's chest for a long, relieved moment.

Sesshoumaru's spine slowly stiffened and he pulled away, his eyes flicking around the room. They locked on Kimi in a deadly stare.

"Leave her be, my Sesshoumaru," Toga warned softly.

Sesshoumaru didn't appear to hear him...or didn't care. His muscles twitched and his head cocked slowly to one side. Abruptly, his eyes flashed crimson and his teeth elongated as he let out a terrible noise and lunged, claws extended.

Toga growled and caught his pup, slamming him down to the ground. Before he could say a word, however, Sesshoumaru's body twisted in an almost impossible fashion, kicking Toga sharply and with enough force to hurl him back.

The elder inu snarled as he regained his feet, lunging again to intercept Sesshoumaru...and the fight was on in full. Sesshoumaru was fighting with complete disregard for personal safety, without any of his natural grace or fluidity. Insanity gripped him wholly, and his whole world was focused on nothing but destroying this creature that had been so vital to his torment for so long.

"SESSHOUMARU!" Toga snarled, trying to get a grip on his raging pup. Sesshoumaru responded by exploding into his full demon form, teeth sinking into Toga's arm and tearing flesh violently.

Toga took his own demon form - if he didn't, he ran the risk of being torn apart. Blood and fur were soon flying as the two rolled around in a snarling ball of flashing claws and snapping teeth.

With a powerful roar, Toga surged up, despite the fact that it opened his belly to attack - an opportunity Sesshoumaru did not miss - and lunged forward, his teeth catching Sesshoumaru at the throat and his superior weight bowling him over, holding him down tightly as he growled. Sesshoumaru growled in return but slowly went limp, defeated, as some slight hint of sanity began to worm its way back into his eyes.

Sairex, Kimi, and Naraku were all staring at the two of them. Sairex was horrified to see the vicious, wholly brutal fight unwind and helpless to intervene. Naraku was watching with avid interest, and Kimi had been staring in mute horror. For several long, frightening moments it had appeared Sesshoumaru would have the upper hand - especially since Toga had been trying not to hurt his pup while Sesshoumaru had had no similar reservations.

Toga's voice was a deep, threatening growl as he loosed his grip on Sesshoumaru's throat. "You will go to my room."

A low, equally threatening rumble echoed in Sesshoumaru's chest, and Toga bared his teeth at him.

"It is NOT a request, Sesshoumaru. Go. NOW."

Sesshoumaru gave Toga one last defiant, angry glare before reluctantly slinking from the room. Toga watched him go before slowly retaking his human form and taking stock of his injuries. There was no noise save for the steady dripping of blood to the floor for a long moment.

Toga finally turned hard eyes on Kimi. "I don't know what it is you hope to gain by staying here, and I am NOT going to stand guard over you at all times. If you choose to remain, it will be at your own peril. I will not tolerate much of this. I do not mind a spar with my Sesshoumaru on occasion, but I will not long allow myself to be placed in a position of having to do real combat with him. And Sairex..."

"Yes?"

"Just...go and bring the others back home safely. It would be best if you are not around for a time. Hopefully Sesshoumaru will have calmed some by the time you return. He will not appreciate your involvement in my return."

Sairex nodded. "Of course."

Toga turned to Naraku. "And you...."

Naraku smiled. "I would speak with you in private, Lord Toga. I have a... proposition...for you."

Toga nodded. "Walk with me." While he couldn't say he trusted Naraku...the kumo had had plenty of opportunity to betray him already and had elected not do do so. Toga at least owed him enough to hear him out.

Naraku fell into step next to Toga. "It is quite simple, really. I have regained my mind, but that does not mean I shall revert to who I once was. The things I have observed over the past few years in your castle suddenly begin to make sense."

Toga nodded. "Indeed. What do you propose?"

"The bandits of the South are largely wild and growing more and more daring ever since their Lord fell. Many are the reports of assaults along your borders and even a surprising distance into the West by raiders and slavers, thieves and murderers."

"Yes..."

"Grant me the use of your military and ignore any atrocities I may commit for now...and I shall bring the South to order with myself as Lord, and an ally to the West."

Toga mulled it over for a long while. From what he had heard, Naraku could be a match for the former Southern Lord, Shimaku, in ruthless cunning. Indeed, perhaps the kumo COULD do the job, claim the title of the new Bandit King. It was not without risk, to allow someone like Naraku such power...but then again, should the kumo stay true to his word, the southern borders would again be safe to live in and travel through. "Very well. We have an accord, Naraku. Should you even think to betray me...know that I can and will crush you."

"Of course...but fighting you would be entirely counterproductive."

Toga nodded. "Very well. We shall discuss this further on the morrow. For now...I have to tend to other matters." He glanced at his bedroom door meaningfully.

"Be careful. I don't think he'll want to snuggle."

Toga smirked. "Be gone with you...and thank you for all you have done." When Naraku bowed slightly and left, Toga went into his bedroom.

Sesshoumaru was sitting in his bed and glaring murderously. Toga's eyes narrowed as he sat down himself. "I did not in any way enjoy what just happened, my Sesshoumaru."

"You DEFENDED that BITCH!" Sesshoumaru hissed, the venom in his voice almost more toxic than what was in his claws.

"I did not defend her out of a sense of choosing her over you or anything ridiculous like that. There are things about the situation that came to light which you have no way of knowing about, and until they are dealt with accordingly I will not let you rip her apart."

"Then you best hope this Sesshoumaru does not catch her alone."

Toga growled. "It is a direct order from ME, your Lord Father and your patriarch, your mate and your alpha, that you STAND DOWN, Sesshoumaru. I will NOT tolerate you contesting this matter. If you wish to challenge me then I shall accept, but otherwise you WILL do as I say."

"You are back for a mere few minutes and favoring a twisted whore over me! DO YOU KNOW WHAT SHE DID TO ME?! Even without the torment, she tried to rip me out of her gut before I was born and abandoned me....a lying, cheating, unscrupulous bitch....and yet YOU are defending her!"

"SILENCE!" It was with a great effort that Toga refrained from rejoining their earlier combat.

"I WILL NOT! I will NOT stand for this! I have devoted all I am to you, and you STILL suffer her to be in your presence, within the walls of your castle despite knowing how I have bled because of her!"

"A lot can change in seven hundred years, Sesshoumaru. She is no longer the foolish pup she was back then and has shown regret. It does not mean I forgive her anything or want anything to do with her."

Sesshoumaru leapt to his feet. "Well, then. Again, I am rendered mere background noise when your females come home. I am sorry that my feelings on this mean so little."

"Damn it, Sesshoumaru, it isn't like that. Just because I prevented you from KILLING her does not--"

"I do not want to hear it. You need to get your priorities straight, Father. As long as she is here, I refuse to be." With that, Sesshoumaru turned and stalked out of the room.

Toga jumped up himself. "Sesshoumaru! Stop!"

Sesshoumaru, however, did not stop. There was a flash of light....and he was gone.

Toga sighed and slumped back down. Sesshoumaru's words had hurt him far more than any of the injuries. How could he ever imply that Toga thought little of his emotions or feelings? Sesshoumaru was his world. Kimi was nothing. Just because he felt it prudent to spare her life was not a sign that he desired her in any way.

After a moment, Toga blinked and then winced, a sharp little barb slashing at his heart. // Father, eh?... He hasn't called me that alone...since he was four years old. I believe I might have screwed this one up fairly badly... damn it. Now what? //


	134. Chapter 133

Pride (In the Name of Love) 133 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Yes, I've been distracted lately. Lol...I've actually had SOMETHING TO DO besides sit around and be bored and lonely, thus I didn't have all my life to devote to writing.

On another note, there is now a fic posted on all my sites called 'Of Doom!'. It is an RK / IY crossover colab I'm writing with the lovely Liera Antionette - go on and give it a look if you like. =D Hope you enjoy this chapter, and a huge thanks to everyone that sent me pics.

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Sesshoumaru glared at nothing in particular, laying on his back and staring into the sky at the clouds. A small flock of birds landed a short ways from him. He gave them a glare, too, but they seemed rather nonplussed by it.

One bird detached itself from the flock and hopped sideways closer to him. Sesshoumaru gave it another glare but then ignored it.

A few moments passed, and then the bird took another hop closer, looking completely innocent and nonchalant.

Glare. Hop. Glare. Hop.

The bird was fairly close by this point and it settled down comfortably next to his head and stared at the clouds with him.

Sesshoumaru finally sat up and gave the bird a snarl. "Sairex, leave me alone." He gave a halfhearted swat at the raven, who hopped backwards with a caw and a rapid flapping of wings.

Sairex shifted into his humanoid form. It was strange to watch, really...the way his body twisted and almost seemed to flow into his other shape. "Vell, aren't ve testy today..."

"Next time I won't miss."

"Zo you zay. Vhy are you on da roof?"

Sesshoumaru was silent. Sairex sighed.

"Look. Running avay from your father is NOT da answer. Vhat are you tinking, pup?"

"What are you doing out here following this Sesshoumaru in the first place?"

Sairex's lips twitched up in a smirk. "I vasn't, actually...I vas trying to figure out vhat I zhould do and den you appeared on da roof."

Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes. "Why should you need to figure out anything, raven?"

Sairex sighed. "Vell, I vas actually running avay from you."

"A good plan, then, to confront me when I was unaware of your presence."

Sairex frowned. "Lord Zezzhoumaru...I cannot allow you to leave. I know vhat must have prompted it, and I'm zure you must be upset..."

"What would you know of it? Stay out of my personal affairs, raven."

Sairex sighed.

"Why would you be fleeing me in the first place?"

"Because it vas I dat helped da kumo absorb your father zo he could release him."

Sesshoumaru's spine shot ramrod-straight and he turned surprised on Sairex. "You....did....what?"

"I figured your reaction vould be zometing like dis, but you vould find out eventually zo I von't bother lying."

The raven was fast, but Sesshoumaru was faster. With a vicious growl, he sprang forward. Sairex's eyes widened in alarm and he leaped, but was caught and slammed back down into the roof. Sesshoumaru snarled, his claws suddenly glowing green. "What manner of fool ARE you?" Sesshoumaru hissed. "Do you realize what could have happened?"

Sairex arched his back with surprising force, managing to buck Sesshoumaru off of him, but he was caught again before he could escape. "I don't vant to fight you, damn it...!"

Sesshoumaru snarled in helpless rage and slammed his hand forward. Sairex lunged to the side and Sesshoumaru's claws sizzled through the roof. Sairex caught him by the wrist before he was able to deliver another blow, and the two of them wrestles for a moment. Sesshoumaru managed to score several more acid-dripping hits to the roof, but the raven was agile enough to more or less dodge all but a few minor strikes.

Both parties froze in place at the sudden ominous groan beneath them, exchanging a startled glance...right before the roof gave way and sent them tumbling into the building.

Sairex landed with a pained woosh of air, although he was spared most of the collapsing roof by Sesshoumaru's body on top of him. Sesshoumaru looked rather dazed from a particularly hard blow to the head. Neither of them were able to move for a long moment.

Toga came flying around the corner and stopped, staring, at the scene in front of him. He had abruptly felt both Sairex and Sesshoumaru's auras flare up, then heard the tremendous crash. He stared slack-jawed at the hole and then the two of them.

Sesshoumaru stood up and wobbled, stumbling back and hitting the wall with a muttered curse. He lifted his hand to the back of his head and it came back damp with blood.

Sairex let out a little hiss as he sat up, clutching at his back. "Nn...dammit..."

Toga looked between the both of them in helpless concern. Sairex smiled ruefully and inclined his head slightly in Sesshoumaru's direction. That was all the prodding it took and Toga was at Sesshoumaru's side in an instant.

"My Sesshoumaru..."

"Leave me alone..." Sesshoumaru mumbled darkly. "I'm still leaving...I meant what I said."

Toga narrowed his eyes and then grabbed hold of Sesshoumaru, pulling him into a tight hug. "Damn it, pup....she means nothing to me. You confuse my mercy and my sympathy for caring. If I have to physically hold you here to prevent you from leaving until you see that, I will."

Sesshoumaru's glare turned to Sairex. "You are dismissed from your oath of fealty, raven. Get out of this castle."

Sairex arched an eyebrow. Toga was about to speak, but Sairex interrupted smoothly. "As you vill, Lord Zezzhoumaru. Zhould you have a change of heart...you vill be able to contact me."

Toga's look was extremely unhappy, even if he understood what the raven was doing. If he contradicted his son's order, it would lead to another battle just as unpleasant as the last one with likely the same result and he didn't think his heart could take it.

Sairex bowed and quickly made his way out of the room, rubbing ruefully at his back and flexing his wings slowly to try and ease some of the ache from his poor landing.

Toga turned his full attention back to the not-so-happy taiyoukai in his arms. "My Sesshoumaru...please. Let me talk to you. Do not leave."

"Is that an order, Father?"

Toga winced and closed his eyes. "No. A request."

"I am disinclined to acquiesce to a request at this time."

"Please, Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru was taken aback, golden eyes widening when Toga dropped to a knee in front of him, clutching his hand and bowing his head. His Lord Father, proud and eminent, actually physically begging him to stay? It tugged at Sesshoumaru's confused and aching heart enough that he finally let out a little growl and mumbled, "Fine."

Toga did not rise. "My Sesshoumaru...I have not always been the best father to you. I openly admit that I have had my share of flaws. I have made my share of errors. I did not always treat you as you deserved. We have not spoken of it since my return...so I shall now. I know how...the whole incident with Izayoi must have hurt you. I never meant to make you feel second best. Just because I had come to love her did not mean I loved you any less....although I was remiss in paying you proper attention. I got so caught up in worrying for her that...I allowed things to change between us."

Sesshoumaru bit his lip but said nothing.

"And I know I have made other errors. When it comes to your own mother...I cannot regret her because without her, I would not have you. She hurt me terribly and I know she hurt you as well with her abandonment. I do not know what you have suffered while in the clutches of those fiends, and to even imagine breaks my heart. But please, Sesshoumaru, understand... even if it was an illusion of her that did things to you... that does not mean it was her. I in no way excuse her or forgive her for her past, recent or distant. During my captivity we spoke at length. I do believe she regrets her actions of the past, and I believe her apology. For that reason alone, I would spare her life."

"I do not want her here, my Lord Father..." Sesshoumaru slowly slid to his knees, his hands dropping to his lap and his head bowing. "Please."

Toga wrapped his arms around Sesshoumaru and held him tightly, slowly threading his fingers through his hair. "I shall not have her remain. I.... I leave her fate to you. I will abide by any decision you make in this regards...but please, show her mercy even though she showed you none."

Sesshoumaru buried his face in Toga's chest, aware that he was starting to tremble slightly. With the self-righteous anger he had so carefully stoked boiled away, all that remained was a horrible, gnawing hollow pain that his beloved Lord Father would replace him....care more for her than he did for him. The fear of losing him again was the most dreadful thing in his life...the thought of losing him while he was still alive and present was unthinkable. "Exile her back to wherever she came from. I don't care...I just don't want her near me. I don't want to ever see her again."

"I shall. Will you come with me to my room?"

Sesshoumaru nodded quietly and they both stood up, making their way down the hall. Toga shut the door behind them and laid down, pulling Sesshoumaru into his arms and hugging him close to his chest. Sesshoumaru sighed and allowed himself to relax somewhat, lulled by the sound of Toga's heartbeat under his ear.

"My Lord Father...forgive this Sesshoumaru....please. Do not ever leave me...I can't even bear the thought."

"Hush, pup. I will do everything I can to stay with you always. Nothing and no one will ever replace you. You are the most important thing in all my world, and I love you with all my heart. Now sleep, my Sesshoumaru."

Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and allowed himself to be lulled to sleep, and Toga soon followed.


	135. Chapter 134

Pride (In the Name of Love) 134 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Vacation has been good for the Jess, even if it has made some of my more rabid fans sad. I've been distracted lately working on a big project for a friend's birthday and reading a long manga over a slow connection and things like that. However, one by one, my distractions are dwindling. When they're gone, I'll probably be back to daily (or near daily) updates again.

I'm currently working on getting a new website put together...and it is not as easy as I thought it'd be. I think I made a bad choice in hosts...we'll see if they can help me with what I want or if I'll have to go somewhere else. Either way...I'm about done with my vacation of sorts, I suppose. I better get back to writing before y'all lynch me. I can't promise great speed in updates yet...but soon.

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Inuyasha was waiting with extreme impatience by the well. He jumped to his feet when Sairex flew in. "It's about damn time you got back!"

Sairex smiled faintly. "You can go and get your friends. Da crisis is over, your father is free."

"Well, thats good news. You comin' with me?"

"I vill vait here."

"Eh...whats wrong with you?"

"Lord Zezzhoumaru and I got into it a bit, you could zay. I've been fired and kicked out of da castle." Sairex couldn't help but smirk. "Vill you be kind enough to let me know vhen Lord Toga overrules dat order zo I can come back?"

"Yeah, of course. Er...what are ya gonna do about Miroku and Ali?"

"I don't know. I can't enter da castle for now, but... I really don't tink I'll be gone zo long dat it vill be vorth finding a new place to live. I might take dis chance to go and find out vhat Zetsukosei left behind and zee if I can learn anyting."

"Alright...so you want me to just bring em home and then you'll call when you're done and I'll...er...letcha know if you can come back yet?"

"Pretty much."

Inuyasha nodded. "Got it. ...Damn, Sessh really fired you?"

"Vell...he vas a bit upset vith me and da tactics I used to free your father."

"Do I want to know, or will it piss me off?"

"Probably da latter...but it vorked out just fine vith no ill effects."

"Then I'm perfectly happy not knowing."

Sairex grinned and then bowed. "I vill zee you zoon den, Lord Inuyazha."

Inuyasha turned and hopped into the well.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku frowned as Inuyasha explained Sairex's absence. "Sesshoumaru fired him? Damn it."

Ali squinted. "I'ma exorcize him again."

Miroku chuckled and ruffled her hair. "Oh, no need for that. I'm sure Sairex will be back before we know it." The monk paused for a moment before turning his attention back towards Inuyasha. "What of Naraku?"

Inuyasha blinked. "Eh? What about him?"

"Exactly. He is not with you. Did he remain at the castle with Lord Toga and Sesshoumaru?"

Inuyasha frowned and thought about it hard. "Well, I guess he must have. Sairex didn't seem at all worried by his absence, so...well. I don't really know. Anyway, er... I'm supposed to bring you all back now. Miroku, Sairex ran off to do some spy work while he's out...he said he really doesn't think it'll be too long before he can come back so there's no point in the lot of you moving anywhere."

"Spy work?... Sounds like he's getting himself in trouble again."

"Eh. He went to go check out the dragon's stuff back in the Circle, and the dragon is gone and can't hurt him. Maybe he'll even find somethin' beneficial."

"I suppose."

It was with varying degrees of reluctance that the group of them left Kagome's new and fabulous begin the trek back to the Western Castle.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru growled softly, not at anything in particular but just the world in general. He had seriously mixed feelings about his father giving Naraku his blessings to go ahead and take the reins of the South...but what could he do about it? The South was assuredly not their territory, and if Naraku was going to try and take it over...it really wasn't their business. In fact, it almost was to their benefit if some semblance of law and order was restored to the wild lands.

But on the same token, Naraku's personal history aside, it was a risky move. Neither the East nor the North were on the best of terms with the West at present, what with the recently averted war. It was entirely possible that they could view the West assisting Naraku's takeover of the South as the West taking over and simply installing a puppet Lord of sorts. This truly wasn't the case...but Sesshoumaru had been in the political game long enough to know that sometimes, appearances mattered more than truth.

And then...the whole business with Sairex. Just thinking of the raven demon brought a fresh growl to Sesshoumaru's throat. It wasn't that he wasn't glad to see his Lord Father...of course he was. He just couldn't believe that the raven had been foolhardy enough to risk his Lord Father being absorbed by Naraku.

Angry or not, however... Sesshoumaru figured he was probably going to have to give in on THIS issue, at least. He knew how close Toga and Sairex were, past relationships aside, and he couldn't imagine that throwing the raven out on his pointy ear was going to sit well with his Sire. In all honesty, he was surprised his order hadn't been directly countered the moment it left his lips.

But then again... in retrospect, he recalled the warning look Sairex had shot to Toga. Chances were good that his Lord Father had been planning on it but hadn't out of consideration for his anger. And he was angry. Hell, he was STILL angry...but he couldn't hold on to what was left of his ire no matter how he tried. His father had a way of soothing his savage beast, so to speak, and after a long sleep in the elder inu's arms he just couldn't work himself up into a proper rage.

One of the first things he had done upon waking had been to issue his orders in regard to Kimi. She had been exiled back to her own castle and was not to return under a very real threat of death. Really, Sesshoumaru had wanted to rip her to shreds on the spot... // And again, my Lord Father deflects my rage. //

Oh well.

Sesshoumaru paused as his wandering took him to the room he had inadvertently crashed into with Sairex. The servants were busy cleaning up the debris and patching the hole. Many of them were curious as to how it had happened, but none of them were fools enough to dare comment. // Smart help, for a change?... //

Sesshoumaru jumped with a startled curse as a pair of arms snaked around his waist, although his other senses caught up to his reactions before he sank his green-glowing talons into flesh. He half twisted around to squint at Toga, who chuckled and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

"Hello, my Sesshoumaru. You seem surprised."

"How did you sneak up on this Sesshoumaru? Even in introspection, I am not so easily caught unaware. I could neither sense your aura, smell you, or hear your approach."

Toga released him with a grin. "I'm well aware of your superb senses, my Sesshoumaru... just suffice it to say that this old dog still knows a few tricks."

"Your tricks almost earned you a painful day recovering from my claws."

Toga chuckled. "It wouldn't be the first time you've poisoned me."

Sesshoumaru looked down, aware of the heat in his cheeks. "My Lord Father, I was a small pup and didn't even know I had venom in the first place!"

"And I was sick for the rest of the day and most of the night. You were such a stubborn child." Toga paused for a moment and then grinned. "Not much has changed."

Sesshoumaru gave him a dark look. "I am most certainly NOT the same as I was when I was a pup."

Toga chuckled. "The troubles you invite now are far more epic in scale in comparison... and you're grown now and act so much more serious...not that you weren't serious, even as a pup."

"And you always humored me. It's likely your fault I am accused of being egotistical."

"Well..." Toga couldn't help but chuckle.

"I am aware of it. It does not shame me. This Sesshoumaru has reason to be supremely proud of my utter magnificence."

Toga rolled his eyes. "Well then, oh magnificent one...come with me. The time has come to make our move. The dracolich has been captured. Both the North and East are running fairly smoothly, with the installment of their new leaders. Naraku will likely be capable of taking and holding the South...and I trust he will keep to his word. I understand your history with him, but anyone is capable of change...especially with what he's went through of late. Ultimately, we have but one problem remaining and then everything will go back to the normal, daily grind. That is Jormandar. We must begin the preparations for his downfall."

Sesshoumaru nodded slowly. "Yes. Once he is removed, the last of our problems with the Circle are dealt with. We'll be left with nothing but the standard issues associated with the West...and I can't say I've ever thought I would be glad to have nothing more dire than paperwork and prissy, overstuffed, posturing lordlings scrambling to curry our favor to put up with..."

Toga chuckled and nodded. "Indeed. Come, we'll discuss it over a meal. We will not be caught off guard again...although it would be rather nice if I had a brilliant tactician with intimate knowledge of the Circle to help..."

"Tricks you may possess, my Lord Father, but your ability to subtly hint at things is sorely lacking."

"I wasn't really making an effort. But you know as well as I do that without Sairex's help, I'd still be stuck in that orb. It does not sit well with me how you cast him out after all he has done for us."

Sesshoumaru huffed at his bangs. "I rescind the order. Happy?"

"Quite." Toga smiled and led the way to the dining hall. "After you."


	136. Chapter 135

Pride (In the Name of Love) 135 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I know, I know. I vanished without much warning. I apologize. Lots of stuff happened.

So I decided to take a go at this professional authoring thing, though I'm not sure I'm quite good enough. We'll see. I need to survive somehow. So I spent a bunch of time trying to make a website and then ultimately switching everything up entirely...so I have to make the site all over on a new server and I'm html stupid. Couple that with the fact I have virtually no net access right now....well. Yeah. And my muse took off on me...writer's block like ya wouldn't believe.

Not sure if I'd have anyone interested in subscribing to a web serial or not - it'll be high fantasy, sword and sorcery and all that good jazz, some of my original works. Probably a chapter a week (bigger than these ones), pretty cheap. Would anyone be at all interested? Just drop me a line (if I get any responses to this it'll make me a lot more motivated to get the site up and running, that's for sure.)

Anyway! I'm gonna try and get back on the ball writing and stuff...I just have NOT felt my muse lately and it's made things rough. No motivation to get up and go and all that.

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Within the next few days, everyone was back home in the Western Castle, Sairex included. He and Sesshoumaru had a brief conversation and Sesshoumaru actually apologized to the raven.

Since the political drama was more or less settling down, it gave the West a bit of a breather. The East and North were stabilizing. Things were still in turmoil in the South, but all reports of southern bandits being found far north of their territories in any direction had been cut down drastically. Naraku had burst onto the scene and proclaimed himself as the new Southern Lord. With the help of his borrowed military, he was putting down those that would dare challenge him and stating his authority. It seemed the kumo was born for this role. Shimaku's old advisor had readily joined up with him, and between the two of them, things were being tied back down under the new law.

Sairex dove almost immediately back into his books and his notes. While he enjoyed his daughter having a playmate her own age, he knew he desperately needed to put things right with the wolf king. Kouga made a cute cub, to be sure, but that was hardly the point.

Miroku peeked over the raven's shoulder. "Anything I can do to help?"

Sairex sighed and set the amulet down in front of him, stretching. "Kaa...I'm afraid not. Da zpell vas interrupted. As far as I can tell, it zhould have vorked as I intended if I had finished da casting, but vith it being interrupted and misfiring like dat, its zo hard to figure out vhat I need to do to reverse da effects. On da upzide, it DOES mean I've found a vay to meddle vith time itzelf..."

"And on the downside, Inuyasha is mated to the three-year-old king of the wolf pack, which Ginta and Hakkaku can only stall for so long."

"Exactly." With a sigh, Sairex picked up the runed amulet by its chain and watched it swing slowly back and forth. "A counter-zpell von't vork, but maybe if I tried a reversal from da point I vas interrupted at..."

"You know exactly where you were interrupted?"

"Exactly, no...but da vay I zee it, even if I get him close to his old age and he has everyting important back in his mind....a couple days or veeks or vhatever of his life being missing is a lot better dan a lot of years."

"That's true."

Sairex scowled, his optimism vanishing. "It's just zo damn frustrating. I'm no fledgling. Dat kind of mistake isn't one I ever, ever zhould have made. Anyone can get distracted and my concentration broke, but to zay a name and direct it? Dat vas ztupid. Ugh. Vith as long as I've been doing this..." Sairex slapped the amulet down on the desk with an unhappy little grumble.

The amulet began to glow, runes flaring to life with purple light. Sairex's eyes widened and he stared at it in surprised horror. "Oh bloody hell....vhat d--" The raven was cut off as the thing started to shake and a brilliant flare of light erupted from the golden disc.

Miroku heard a roar of wind rushing past his ears, and everything around him was too bright to see. He had the sensation of falling endlessly, with no sense of direction and no idea where he was, everything spinning until his consciousness faded away to nothing.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

"...And if we bring along those extra soldiers, they can cover us from anything unexpected. It should be fairly simple."

Sesshoumaru nodded, eyeing the rough map spread out on the table and sipping at his tea. "A good plan, my Lord Father. I would not expect extra resistance, however, if you and the raven took out as many of Jormandar's troops as you say."

"True enough. Any army, created or summoned or even hired...takes time to gather. Even if he has built up his defenses since Sairex and I attacked, they surely cannot be back to full capacity." Toga grinned and idly munched on another of the wonderful, delicately seasoned little strips of meat his cooks had brought for him and Sesshoumaru. "And with us better prepared..with the addition of your strength and your brother's...as well as a proper army...it shouldn't present too many difficulties."

Sesshoumaru nodded, pleased. He finally felt like they were making inroads in closing this whole nightmarish debacle. The dracolich was trapped in that crimson orb...and that orb had been carefully sealed in a heavily warded chest, buried deep in the castle's treasury in the room that only the reigning Lord of the West ever had access to. The West would fall before someone would get into THAT room.

With the dracolich out of the picture, the female raven dead, the political nightmare dying down, and no new enemies rearing their heads...Jormandar remained the lone major point of contention and he seemed to be on shaky ground at best.

"This Sesshoumaru will begin preparations for our assault immediately. I..." Sesshoumaru trailed off as the doors to the dining room opened and Aliana came in. The little raven made a beeline for Toga, climbing up into his lap.

"Hi, Uncle Toga!"

Toga chuckled. "Well hello there, Lady monk."

Ali shook her head vehemently. "I'm not a monk anymore. I'm a ninja now."

Toga nodded sagely. "Ah, of course...and a wonderful ninja you are! I did not even realize you were a ninja, so great are your skills at disguise! Here I thought you were a mere monk...you've fooled this old dog, girl."

Ali beamed, not having thought of it THAT way. Sesshoumaru couldn't help but smile a bit - his Lord Father certainly had a way with the little ones, didn't he?

"So, what can I do for you, Lady ninja? Or are you just coming to visit us?" Toga slid the snack plate closer, much to the girl's delight.

"Oh...I can't find my parents anywhere. I looked all over, but they're gone...and their room is a mess! It looked like the last time one of my father's spells blew up."

"Really? Well, I'll have to make sure it gets cleaned up." Toga shot a concerned glance over the girl's head in Sesshoumaru's direction, and his pup nodded.

"This Sesshoumaru will look into it," Sesshoumaru stated as he stood up smoothly, leaving his father to entertain the young demoness.

'A mess' was one way of putting it. The entire room had been burned out, the stone scorched and all traces of furniture nothing more than black ashy spots on the ground. A sharp odor, like the ozone smell of lightning, assaulted his sensitive nose. There was no sign of Sairex or Miroku. Before Sesshoumaru turned to leave, however, something curious caught his eye.

// Sand?...Why is there sand on the floor? //

Having no answer, the taiyoukai turned and quickly headed back to report what he'd found to Toga, alarms going off in his head. The first was worry for his friends...yes, friends. The lot of them had all become something of an impromptu family, no matter their differences. Even if Sesshoumaru tended to hold himself apart from them on most occasions... that did not mean someone else was allowed to hurt someone from his pack. And further...if both the raven and the monk were gone, they had no way to get to the Black Circle...and that meant they couldn't stop Jormandar. This nightmare couldn't end.

This was definitely not good.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

It was so, so hot. Miroku felt like he was in an oven. His tongue felt like a piece of dry leather and he tasted the grit of sand in his mouth. // What?...// Groggily, he opened his eyes. What he saw made him shoot into a sitting position.

There was nothing but sand in all directions. The sun beat down with blistering, scorching heat. Miroku shut his eyes and opened them again, trying to make sense of the scene in front of him. // A desert?... How? What...what happened? Sairex! //

The raven was laying next to him and was starting to come to himself. Sairex went through the same stage of initial shock and disbelief before turning to look at Miroku. His voice was a dry croak at first and he had to try a couple times to get his words out. "Miroku...are you alright?"

"Yeah," the monk said after a moment. Talking was painful. Just how long had they sat there baking under that sun, anyway?

"Vhat is dat?" Sairex squinted and pointed off to the right. Miroku raised a hand to shield his eyes from the sun, but he couldn't make anything out besides the wavering heat rising from the sand.

"I don't know. Your eyes are better than mine."

"I tink it might be zome zort of buildings. Come on. It's better dan zitting out here cooking." Sairex made an effort to get the sand out of his hair and wings. Miroku very soon began to wish he was dressed in a simple waist wrap like his mate rather than his heavy robes.

"I can't travel like this, Sairex, I'll die of the heat." Soon Miroku had stripped and was dressed only in his purple kesa, tied around his waist. "It looks like a skirt..."

Sairex chuckled. "It's very cute on you."

"Oh, shut up," Miroku muttered as they headed off. Sairex's eyes proved to be accurate - what he had seen was a small cluster of rough clay adobe buildings, apparently some sort of village. The two exchanged a glance, have never seen anything like it before. "Where do you suppose we are?"

"I have no idea."

The two of them stopped in their tracks as a group of men came around the corner. They were dark haired and had deeply tanned skin. All of them wore white wraps around their waists and carried bronze-tipped spears. They caught sight of Miroku and ran over.

"Tjen!"

Miroku blinked and glanced at Sairex, who hadn't yet come out of the shadow of the building. Three men with spears was hardly much concern for the well-seasoned monk who had fought down so many demons.

One of the men walked up towards Miroku, eyeing him very suspiciously. Miroku didn't blame them - here he was, a pale Japanese man wearing what looked almost like a purple skirt and carrying a staff, sporting a decent sunburn by now - that had to look odd.

"Pet er renek?" the man demanded, pointing his spear at Miroku.

Miroku frowned. "Er..."

Sairex slid forward to stand next to his mate. The effect was immediate. All three men gasped and dropped their spears, dropping to the ground and bowing their heads. "A'a netjer!"

Sairex and Miroku exchanged confounded looks - what in the world had they gotten themselves into?

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A/N - Miroku and Sairex are in ancient Egypt. XD And YES, it's REAL ancient egyptian! You have no idea how much research I've done for this...and I'm sure I'll get some of it wrong...but it'll be at least pseudo-correct. Mwehehehe.


	137. Chapter 136

Pride (In the Name of Love) 136 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - I missed getting all those lovely reviews so much... So like I said, I'm trying to keep up on this updating thing. We'll see how it goes. Thanks to all of ya, it was a very warm reception. I'll be bouncing back and forth between this and my other fic (a Rurouni Kenshin story) and trying to get the ball rolling on both. So please, bear with me. Life is rough and my muse is still being difficult. Love y'all!

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Miroku looked at the three prostrated men and then at Sairex. He kept his voice to a low murmur, leaning over to Sairex and trying to keep his smile while speaking through clenched teeth. "Sairex, what the hell is going on here?"

Sairex twitched. "I don't know. I don't know vhat dey are tinking, either."

One of the men hesitantly lifted his head, eyeing Sairex and Miroku. "A'a netjer, pen hem netjer-tepey-ek?"

Sairex kept his expression neutral and glanced at Miroku. "Do you have any idea vhat dey are zaying?"

Miroku shook his head a bit. "Not a clue." He smiled at the men and held up one hand to signal for them to wait a moment before walking off a short distance with Sairex. "What the HELL happened?"

Sairex cringed. "Vhen I hit dat amulet I must have activated a zpell of zome zort. Dammit, I quit. Two fledgling miztakes in zo zhort a time? At least I can do zometing about da language barrier. Ztick out your tongue."

Miroku blinked curiously before obeying. Sairex performed a short chant and then quickly slashed one talon across Miroku's tongue. Before the monk could even yelp, however, the cut and the brief instant of pain vanished with a faint purple glow. "What did you just do?"

"Vell, vithout a mirror I can't draw a rune on my own tongue. It'll allow you to understand dese people and for dem to understand you."

"Oh, good. Time to get some answers, then."

The two walked back to the three men. Miroku flashed them a smile. "Er...hello."

The three men gasped and quickly bowed their heads again. Miroku frowned slightly. "You can get up..."

The effect was immediate as they leapt to their feet, still keeping their eyes averted. When they spoke again, however, it took Miroku a moment to puzzle out what he was hearing. While he knew they were still speaking their native tongue, at the same time, he heard their words in Japanese. "Thank you, High Priest." One of them hesitantly stepped forward.

"High Priest....to what do we owe this most high honor? Why does one of the great gods visit our humble village?"

Miroku almost choked. It took all his willpower to keep his expression neutral before answering. "That is for the god to know. I accompany him to express his wishes to you, should he deign me worthy to reveal them. Ordinary mortals cannot understand the language of the gods."

Three sets of eyes widened and they were bowing and offering fervent apologies, begging them not to take offense with their foolish mortal ways and questions.

Sairex squinted at his mate. "I really am vaiting to hear vhat's going on."

Miroku dropped back to speaking Japanese - it wasn't hard to work around this language spell once he got the hang of it. "They think you're a god and I'm your high priest. I told them you wouldn't talk to them because mortals can't understand the language of the gods."

"A god? Me? You have GOT to be kidding me."

"Better a live god than a cooked bird in the desert, eh?"

"Miroku, dis is a dangerous game."

"Look, if it comes to a fight, I can handle myself. They're just ordinary humans. I'm used to fighting demons. And you ARE a demon, a crafty and powerful one at that. They aren't going to take us out easily even if they DO rise against us." Miroku turned his attention back to the humans, switching to their tongue. "The great god wishes to rest. Take us to your finest structure."

The three men bobbed rapid bows before escorting them down the streets of the town. Two of them ducked off to the side to start spreading the word, and soon most of the village was following, staring in awe at Sairex. Miroku resisted the urge to chuckle - what an odd coincidence this was. Sairex's clothing was very similar in style to that of the natives. He too wore a waist-wrap, although his was silk and trimmed with gold while the natives wore linen. Some had colorful beaded collars that draped down over their shoulders and chests and Sairex only wore a band of gold at his throat, but still... overall, things were quite similar.

It took Miroku a long moment to compose himself and remember to keep walking when he realized most of the women in the village were topless. No one seemed to pay it any mind, however. His gawking earned him a cuff upside the head from Sairex. "Behave, monk."

"I didn't do anything!"

"Keep drooling dat much and you'll flood dis land."

Miroku chuckled. "Just because I look doesn't mean I intend to do anything further. I'm behaving."

Sairex gave him a skeptical look. "Right."

"The only one I want is you."

"But you ztill vant to touch. It's ingrained in you."

Miroku's spine stiffened, his expression the picture of wounded dignity. "I most certainly do not."

"Your hand is tvitching."

"I entirely fail to see the relevance."

Sairex just shook his head, but any retort he might have made was lost as their guide brought them into the local temple. It didn't take too long to figure out why the locals had assumed Sairex was some sort of god - various paintings and symbols on the wall depicted several gods, most of which appeared to be crosses between various animals and humans. All Sairex had to do was twitch his wings open the slightest bit and the awed masses dropped in worship.

Soon Sairex was situated in a room with all the creature comforts one could imagine. A pair of women were fanning him with giant palm leaves. Villagers were lined up outside the door to offer forth their words of prayer and offerings to their visiting deity. The raven did his level best to keep a serene, aloof expression throughout most of the villager's pleas, not understanding a word of it. Miroku eventually said the god desired a break and they were left alone for a few minutes. During this time, they worked out a series of simple cues Miroku could give Sairex so he knew how best to react to the villagers pleas.

Towards evening, the flow of villagers had begun to subside and eventually Miroku informed the guards that the god was done holding audience and that they wished to be left alone. As soon as the doors were shut, Sairex flopped back wearily.

"Miroku, I'm ZO not cut out for dis god ztuff."

The monk chuckled and leaned back next to him. "Oh, that's not true...you looked all imperial and superior and whatnot."

Sairex squinted at him. "Do you know how hard it is to act like I care about vhat dese people are zaying vhen I not only have NO idea vhat dey are zaying, but probably couldn't do a damn ting about it even if I did?"

"Do you think most of these people really expect anything to happen? Its like this, Sairex. No matter what happens for a while, its ALL going to be attributed to you. If they have good luck, its a blessing from the god. If something bad happens, they are being punished by the god. I'm not so sure they would ever believe you AREN'T a god...all the deities they seem to worship are part animal and part human, and wings seem to carry holy significance as well if these wall carvings and decorations are anything to judge by."

"Ve ztill do not know vhere ve are. Or...I hate to zay it, but...ve might have to ask da qvestion of VHEN ve are as vell. Dey zeem to have tools of bronze and even ztone. As you zay, dey ztill attribute everyting to da gods and are very zuperztitious. Everyting is very crude and foreign. I tink ve have gone a great deal back in da past, Miroku." The raven sighed heavily, pulling his knees up to his chest and resting his head on them with a heavy sigh. "On da heels of one catastrophic miztake, I make another. I don't have any of my zupplies or my books..."

Miroku frowned and rubbed Sairex's back. "We all make mistakes, don't worry about it. It will all work out somehow in the end."

"You don't underztand. Dere is another reason I tink ve are very, very far in da past."

"Why is that?" The monk was curious and a little worried at Sairex's uncharacteristic despair.

"Da first ting I tried to do vas access da Circle. I can't. It's not dere."

"Not there?"

"Da only reason it vould not be dere is if it vas deztroyed, vhich is incredibly unlikely...or did not exist yet."

Miroku was taken aback, his expression revealing his surprise at that thought.

"I am over tree tousand years old, Miroku. Da Circle vas made vhen I vas a child just coming into my own."

"Over three thousand years in the past?" Miroku couldn't believe it. "Dear Buddha...are you....are you sure?"

"Of course I'm not zure. But its a logical guess. I don't have any zupplies or books and no vay to get to either. My memory only zerves me zo far. It is true I memorized da text of countless books, but...none of it dealt vith time traveling. And da amulet..." Sairex pulled the amulet out and held it out towards Miroku. "Da holy power in it is gone and da runes are zcratched. Its vorthless. Ve might be ztuck here."

Miroku looked down. The thought was very sobering. On the one hand, if he had to spend the rest of his life stranded in a foreign time and place, at least he would be doing it with the person he loved most. He would miss his friends...and living the life of a High Priest to a fake god grated against even Miroku's sense of religious duty. He wasn't the most holy of monks, but still.

Another thought hit him like a thunderbolt, squeezing his heart painfully. "Oh Buddha....Aliana...."

Sairex nodded. "Zhe is in good hands, of course, but dat's not da point. If I can't tink of a vay to fix dis, ve may never zee our daughter again."

"Without us, they can't get to the Circle or back, either...that's a very serious handicap."

"I know. But despite dat, da vorst of it for me vill be if I never again get to zee my girl just because I'm too ztupid not to go zlapping magic items around like a fledgling."

Miroku wrapped his arms around the raven and hugged him tightly. "Don't keep blaming yourself. We'll find a way through this. We will. Just have faith."

Sairex cracked an eye open to look at the monk as he leaned against him. "Preaching religion to a demon, are ve?"

Miroku couldn't help but smile a bit. "I know I'm far from an ideal monk...but that doesn't mean I don't have faith. I AM still a monk. I believe with all my heart that my god will take care of those that really believe in the end. Things will work out somehow. Even if you don't have the same beliefs as I do...have some faith in me. Trust me. Everything will turn out alright in the end. The sun rises at the end of even the darkest night."

"Careful...zomeone might accuse you of being more holy dan you usually act."

Miroku smiled. "As my god commands...."

Sairex rolled his eyes. "Yes, vell, your great god is zleepy now. Zo...zhut up and ve'll try and figure dis out in da morning. Ve'll zee how brightly da zun is villing to zhine on us."


	138. Chapter 137

Pride (In the Name of Love) 137 / ??

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. adultfanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

// blah // indicates thoughts.

A/N - Just when you think maybe life has thrown you enough crap for a while, it goes and does something else. Lol... long story short, my back is *screwed*. Very bottom of my spine is like...I don't know. Maybe I have a slipped disc or something. All I know is...pain. Lots and lots of pain. This has happened to me twice before...and both times took MONTHS to get better. I can't sit, I can't lay down...I surely can't stand all day. When I finally do park my rear in my chair at my computer, I'm only surviving because I'm taking enough painkillers to tone it down from screaming agony to a dull roar. This does NOT do wonders for my creativity. Which is lame, considering I can't move around and do much, you'd think I'd have lots of time to write, right? I just am having a hard time putting thoughts together to make a plot and I don't want to ruin this for y'all. Sigh. Will update in those rare moments where I haven't moved for an hour or so and I feel almost human again...

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Inuyasha snorted in irritation, wanting nothing more than to remain sleeping. However, something was tickling his nose. And he felt vaguely squashed. The hanyou finally ground one sleep-clogged amber eye open to see Kouga sprawled out on him, sleeping soundly. His hair was the source of the tickling, the majority of the wolf's ponytail being draped across Inuyasha's face.

Inuyasha irritably swatted his mate upside the head with a sleepy growl. "Get off me, ya ass, yer heavy..."

Kouga responded with an equally disoriented kick. "Shut up, 'm sleepin'."

"Yer squishin' me, ya damned flea-ridden wolf!" Inuyasha gave Kouga a much more solid thump, and Kouga promptly boxed him between the ears. Before the fight could escalate, both parties paused as realization hit them at the same time. "Hey! You're not a shrimp anymore!"

Kouga blinked, pulling back to examine himself. "Hey...you're right!" Kouga promptly punched the hanyou in the shoulder. "Why the hell did you let the damn bird turn me into a cub again?!"

"How the fuck is it my fault?!" Inuyasha's ears flattened and he growled at the wolf.

Kouga paused. "I don't really know, but it probably was somehow. Yeah, I remember! You were tryin' to steal my dinner!"

"You bastard, I had just as much right to that as you did. Just because you're faster than me and scarfed down your share didn't mean you got the rest!"

"Fuck you. You need to go on a diet anyways, mutt. Then maybe you wouldn't be so damn slow."

Inuyasha growled and bared his teeth. "You're such an ass. Why the hell do I even l--"

"Shit!"

Inuyasha blinked, ears pricking up. "What?" Their fight was dropped as if it had never been at the genuine alarm flickering in Kouga's eyes.

"What about my pack?! Shit, how long was I out for?!"

"Meh. We took care of it. Ginta and Hakkaku have been acting chiefs in your place because we said you were out doing some mission for my old man or ... I dunno. But it was important and you left them in charge until ya could get back."

"Fuck. I have to go take care of that. The Elders are gonna want to skin me alive. I'll catch up with you later, alright?" Kouga hopped to his feet and made sure he was properly dressed.

"Yeah, sure. I'll go talk to the old man and my brother, make sure they know what's up. Sairex is...gone. So is Miroku. Got no idea where...but hey, at least you're better."

Kouga smirked. "Damn skippy I am." The wolf king bounced towards the door and then paused before stalking back across the room. "Forgot somethin'." Before Inuyasha could blink, Kouga grabbed him by the back of the head and hauled him up, leaning down to give him a hard, long kiss before abruptly letting the hanyou drop. "There." The wolf grinned. "I'll have to get a proper welcome back later."

Inuyasha couldn't help but smirk as he propped himself up on his elbows. "Keh...get outta here, ya mangy wolf. Go fix up yer pack and I'll go talk to mine."

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha leaned on the wall next to the desk. Sesshoumaru was shaking his head, staring out the window and down into the courtyard.

"My Lord Father seems to have regressed to puppyhood," he finally stated, unable to keep his smirk down. Inuyasha snickered.

"Aw, come on Sessh, he's havin' fun. You probably put him through just as much when you were a knee-high brat."

"This Sesshoumaru was never a 'brat', hanyou," the taiyoukai sniffed, although he didn't bother to deny the rest of the claim. He dimly remembered some of the games and ideas he'd drug his father along with; Toga had always humored him no matter what his current scheme was.

At the moment, Toga was with Aliana in the courtyard. Both he and the little raven demoness were covered with paint from an earlier activity. Now they were dressed in sheets and stalking through the courtyard with handmade bows and arrows, apparently hunting something. The inu patriarch looked absolutely ridiculous, but seemed to be having just as much fun as his little 'niece' and didn't mind a bit. And really...who was going to tell the most powerful demon alive he couldn't dress up in the bedsheets and stalk imaginary prey with bows of sticks and string if that's what he felt like doing?

"'This Sesshoumaru' is STILL a brat," Inuyasha countered, dodging the scroll his brother threw at him with a laugh.

"What do you need, little brother?" Sesshoumaru finally asked.

"I don't know what it means and shit, but-"

"Must you use such language? It's demeaning."

"Sorry that I'm not so stick-up-my-ass high-born as you."

Sesshoumaru coughed. "Inuyasha, much as I'd love to agree with you, you're our Lord Father's son. You ARE born to rank. Can't you at least make SOME effort to fit the part?"

Inuyasha's ears flattened back and he squinted at his brother before huffing at his bangs. "Yeah, yeah, whatever. So anyways, get a load of this sh--...crap. Woke up this mornin' an' that ...darn... scrawny wolf was full size again."

Sesshoumaru sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose. "You entirely missed the point, brother. Regardless...the wolf king is back to normal? Has he suffered any damage or memory loss?"

"Not as far as I can tell. He seems to be his usual mangy self, tryin' to piss me off. One of these days, I'll rip off that flea-bitten tail and cram it down his throat."

"The displays of affection between you and the wolf never cease to astound me," Sesshoumaru replied flatly. "Still...my Lord Father will be interested in this information. Sairex was not even close, as last I heard, to breaking the spell he had inadvertently cast upon the wolf. And now, in his absence, it ceases?"

"Well, maybe it only lasted for a set length of time? Or... I dunno, maybe with him gone it couldn't work anymore and ran out of energy or somethin'? I don't know much about magic and shit."

"Nor does this Sesshoumaru. The only one around we could have asked outside the raven is your monk and it seems he is gone as well. In all honesty, we are still entertaining the possibility that they have both perished. The stone itself is scorched in that room."

"We would have found SOMETHING, Sessh. But we didn't. Nothing smelled even remotely like roasted chicken. Or human, for that matter. And what the hell was up with all the sand?"

"I do not know. It may be a clue of some sort, but if it is, the significance is lost on me. For all we knew it had previously been in a container in their room that was destroyed in the fire."

"And just why the fuck would Miroku and Sairex have sand in their room?"

"I have no idea, but I have seen stranger things in the raven's possession. Either way, it tells us nothing. If they did indeed travel to another location, perhaps the sand was from their destination. It isn't enough of a clue to go on. There are innumerable beaches along the coast, and that is providing that they are still in Japan at all."

"Meh. I know. I just wish we knew somethin'. Anything. Sairex is really an alright bird...good guy. I'd hate to see anything happen to him. And... y'know, Miroku's like family to me." Inuyasha eyed his brother after that comment, half expecting some scathing remark about humans and exactly what Sesshoumaru thought about them being associated with the family in any way. However, the taiyoukai simply nodded.

Inuyasha's gaze was drawn out the window. His father was now in his full inu form, albeit a small version, and was giving Ali a ride through the yard. The hanyou's eyes locked on the happy little demon girl. "It's all fun and games now, but if we don't find those two, that poor kid'll be crushed."

"If we cannot locate the raven or the monk, you know full well our Lord Father will take her in and raise her as his own. Even if he did not, this Sesshoumaru would."

Inuyasha did well to hide his surprise at the last half of that remark. He had no doubt that Toga would raise Aliana if she had indeed been orphaned, but to hear his brother volunteer? // Well, he did take care of Rin all those years... but still... // "Yeah. I know that...but still. Even though she'd be taken care of, you can't replace your parents, for better or worse."

Sesshoumaru nodded solemnly, eyes riveted out the window. "I know, Inuyasha. You and I are both very acutely aware of that fact."

Inuyasha chuckled, although there was no real humor in it. "Yeah. We are. I never knew our father and you lost him. And you never knew your mother but I lost mine. Life's a bitch, isn't it?"

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Indeed."

The brothers were silent for a moment, each lost within their own thoughts. Inuyasha finally stood up straighter and stretched. "Well, I have no reason to think Sairex and Miroku are dead and not just missing, so I'm gonna see if I can turn up any other clues as to where they might be."

"If this Sesshoumaru hears word, I will let you know. Likewise, I would appreciate if you kept me informed. I am taking care of matters while our Lord Father is watching the girl."

"Sure thing. I'm gonna have Kouga send out some runners, see if they turned up anywhere nearby."

"Do not have him send too many. Our military is weak at the moment, with a large contingent in the south to aid the kumo. Relationships are still somewhat strained between the four kingdoms."

"Keh, you, me, and our father are an army all of our own. But I got ya. I'm not gonna send out too many. I'll keep ya in the loop."

Sesshoumaru nodded, and Inuyasha made his way out to meet up with Kouga. Neither of the inu brothers had much hope of the wolf scouts turning up anything, but they had to try everything they could. For now, sadly, it was about all they could do.


	139. Chapter 138

Pride (In the Name of Love) 138 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Language, Torture, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - .net, , and ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? - Email me at megami_no_

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N – Just when you thought you'd finally gotten rid of me and that I was dead and gone or something...so much has happened since the last time I could write. I moved house (twice), took care of my grandmother during her last year, helped out my father...and numerous other things that took up a great deal of my time. Things are finally starting to settle down a bit and I'm mostly unpacked and set up. I've been feeling very guilty about not having finished this and I never intended to abandon it...but my muse abandoned me. So...while I cannot promise y'all frequent updates, I can at least make the attempt to update at all!

I'm very out of practice, so I apologize if my lame self beta misses several things. Figured something was better than nothing, get back into the groove. Without further ado, here goes nothin.  
-

"Miroku! Vake UP!"

Miroku let out a low groan and shifted a bit before slowly allowing one eye to open and regard his lover. Sairex was, against all odds, not only awake this early in the morning but looked exceedingly cheery and excited. The two of them had spent most of the past couple weeks exhausted - the desert heat was far from what either of them were used to and had taken a heavy toll. They spent most of the time when Sairex wasn't attending his would-be worshippers catching snatches of restless slumber. Even under the most normal of circumstances back home, however, it was unheard of for the raven to wake up in any way short of grudgingly - he openly despised mornings. "What is it? What time is it?"

"Da zun is going to come up zoon, but dat's not important right now. I tink I've found a vay for us to get home."

That brought Miroku quickly to a sitting position and he rubbed a few remaining traces of sleep from his eyes. "What? Really? How?"

Sairex gave him a smug look. "Vell, I admit dat da tests I've been able to run zo far have been limited. But anyvay, even if I broke dis amulet..." Here the raven winced a bit, gesturing to the pendant that had brought them out here in the first place, now bereft of its holy magic. "Even if I broke dis, da power of one prieztess is hardly da only ting dat has ever tranzcended da laws of time and zpace. I vas using it as a focus, but dere are other tings I can use. Tink about it. Dat vell of Kagome's, da Bone Eater's Vell, is just one more focus. It exists in both times, tying da two of dem together."

"I doubt we're going to find a magical well here in the middle of the desert. We aren't even sure where we are, forget about WHEN."

Sairex snorted at that. "Kaaa, of course ve von't. But dat's not da point, you're mizzing it. Da reason da vell vorks like it does is because it's zpecial. It's imbued vith power, and da fact dat it exists in both times, da zame in ezzence, makes it tranzcend da laws of time. It's a rock in da river. Time moves around it, changing vhat flows past vhile slowly chipping avay at it. Zome day, it vill be zvept up into da river...but for now, it remains. Zo all ve have to do is find zometing dat is here and ztill remains in our own time to use as part of a focus."

"Well, our best guess, having looked at things and done what little research we could, puts this place far before even your birth, Sairex. That puts this place well over three thousand years and change into the past. At least. How many things do you think we're likely to stumble upon that have survived that long?" Miroku's voice trailed off, his argument losing steam as he noted the undaunted exaltation in Sairex's gaze. "Oh. I see. You must have already found something."

Sairex cackled and patted the wall he was leaning against. "Dis whole place, Miroku...dis temple, da city...maybe not all of da city, but a lot of it...dere is a force here dat I do not underztand. Zometing dat is ancient even now zleeps here. Many ley-lines of da vorld are tangled about here. Deep magic. Powerful magic. Dis place is...vatched over. Or, at da very least, da latent energy vill keep its imprint even troo to our own time."

Miroku shifted a bit uneasily at the thought. He was thrilled at the prospect of having found a potential route back home, to their own time, of course. But he was wary at the thought of messing with an ancient power that they knew nothing about...and he was wary of the gleam in Sairex's yellow eyes, knowing full well that his lover was wholly and perhaps dangerously interested in poking and prodding it with a proverbial stick. He remembered all too well how interested Sairex had been in examining his wind tunnel from the inside, a memory that still made him cringe inwardly in horror. It was difficult to weigh his options here. "Alright, granted, that could be entirely correct. So even supposing that this very temple exists even in our day and you can use it as a focus to pull us out of the timestream so we can find the right place to jump back in it...how will you know when, indeed, we need to jump? How can we pinpoint our own time?"

Sairex nodded, having apparently already thought of this too. "Vell, I had to tink about dat one a bit myzelf, but den I realized dat da oppozite vas true. Juzt as ve can use dis temple as a focus dat vill be in both places at once, dere are tings dat are bound to us dat exist in our time and no other. Our daughter carries my own blood. Even more directly, dat bloodztone ve made to cage your vind tunnel carries da blood of us both, far more directly. Dere is no other like it, can never be. It is distinct, unique, and bound to us. From dere, I zhould be able to branch out a little bit and find pretty much exactly vhere ve zhould be."

Miroku paused for a long moment to roll the idea around in his head. He had a working knowledge of how spells, both his own spiritual powers and some of Sairex's more arcane abilities, were put together. While he'd never interfered with anything of this scope - and, truth be told, didn't really want to - it seemed logical enough. A thrill of hope went through him, despite his efforts to keep himself calm. He didn't want to be disappointed if the spell failed...or worse. This was not something to take lightly. "How sure are you this will work?"

Sairex's expression became more serious as he noted the gravity of the monk's tone. "Qvite. I'm villing to ztake my life on it."

The monk eyed the raven for a moment before finally nodding and standing up, stretching before moving to get dressed. "Alright, then. We've spent enough time here. I'm sure everyone is worried about us back home, and we can't expect them to deal with Aliana's terrorism all by themselves."

Sairex chuckled softly at that thought. "Oh, I'm zure zhe's been running poor Toga ragged. Zhe really likes him and he zeems like a big kid himzelf vhen da two of dem get going." The raven stood and stretched his arms over his head, then flexed and refolded his wings. "Alright. I'll zee about getting dis zpell together. It might take a vhile zince I have to do everyting by memory."

Miroku nodded. "I'll go inform your rabid worshippers that you are not keeping audience today and that they'll just have to come back another time or some such thing."

Sairex nodded, already distracted, and set about clearing the floor before and digging through the supplies they'd found until he came up with a piece of chalk. He settled into the laborious task of creating his spell circle as Miroku left to go turn away their daily gathering.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku stood next to Sairex, looking over the circle the raven had drawn. "How do you remember all of these symbols and lines and whatnot without a diagram to work from? I never could."

"Vith tree tousand years of practice maybe you could. Dis is just a ztandard zpell amplification. I've probably drawn it a million times over da course of my life. Now hang on to me. I don't vant to risk us being zeperated."

Miroku smiled and immediately insinuated himself behind the raven, hooking his arms around Sairex's slender waist and pulling him back against his own body, leaning forward to purr in his ear. "Like this?"

Sairex's cheeks flushed and he rolled his eyes a bit. "Vell, I zuppose zo, but you might vant to make very zure you do not diztract me...and dat is very distracting."

Miroku smirked but relented a bit, not molesting his lover but not letting go of him either. "How long will this take?"

"I zhouldn't tink it vill take dat long." So saying, the raven began a low murmured chant. As his voice began to lift in the familiar rhythm of the words of power, various chalk runes and lines lit up until the entire circle was glowing a vibrant shade of electric purple. Miroku felt the power building around them. The room seemed to suddenly twist and melt, the lines and edges blurring indistinctly before spiraling out and leaving them falling into a rush of empty, blue black space. Sairex let out a low gasp and clutched at Miroku's robes. The monk couldn't even manage that much as everything seemed to whip by them in a blur. They were moving fast, impossibly fast, pinpoints and streaks of light exploding all around them.

Beneath them...or was it above them? Around them?...Space was distorted, it was impossible to make sense of such a mundane concept as 'direction'...something moved. Something huge and immeasurably ancient shifted. The last thing Miroku saw before he lost consciousness was twin white slits opening in the bizarre twilit whirl, like huge and burning eyes of white fire set in a blaze of shimmering gold.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Everything felt so calm and soothing. Sairex let out a soft, disoriented sigh as he felt the pressure on his body. The wind was moving over him in a cool but insistent caress. His wings twinged a bit painfully, jerked roughly about, the occasional feather flying free. The sound of madly flapping cloth echoed distantly in his ears. But it was mostly calm...it felt almost like flying.

Flying?...

Sairex forced his eyes open as he struggled to regain his senses, confused and out of touch with reality. His eyes popped much wider as he realized that he was indeed airborne, clutching to Miroku as the two of them plunged in a free-fall headfirst towards the distant, madly spinning ground. The raven sucked in another breath of air that seemed unsatisfying, too thin, barely sufficient for the task. A quick look at Miroku showed his mate to be unconscious, although they had managed to remain tangled up together throughout it all.

Sairex let out an alarmed choke, struggling to free himself a bit from Miroku's grasp and get himself better situated. They were falling way, way too fast and the ground was getting closer at an alarming rate. Were he alone, the raven knew it would be a relatively minor issue to get his wings spread properly and pull out of the dive. However, he was very much not alone and the thought of abandoning his lover to crack like an egg never crossed his mind, despite the fact that he knew he couldn't hope to support the weight of them both.

Sairex wormed his way around behind Miroku, taking care not to lose his grip on the monk, imagining briefly, terribly, of watching his lover spin away into the air to fall alone. He hooked his arms under Miroku's and spread his wings, letting out a small gasp as the wind snapped them open and back painfully, erasing his attemptts at control for a terrifyingly long moment.

With some effort, he managed to pull them out of their headfirst plunge so they were falling more spread-eagled, the air resistance increasing and taking the edge off their descent, using his wings to create as much of a draft as possible as his eyes madly scanned the hilly terrain beneath them. They were headed for a grassy knoll, and Sairex could do little but pray that he could muster the strength to prevent the both of them from exploding on impact.

As the ground sped towards them, the raven shifted his grip and let his wings close some. At the last moment he snapped them back out, pulling them into a swooping glide, careening madly over the ground for a few feet before crashing. The raven twisted so his body would take more of the impact. They hit and sailed over the edge of the hill, bouncing and rolling wildly, the thick grass and damp ground providing meager padding.

Their wicked tumble halted as Sairex slammed into a tree near the base of the hill. Much of their momentum had been stolen by that point, but the impact was still tremendous. Sairex felt a tearing pain in his back that turned into a dull explosion at the base of his neck as his body hit and whipped back flat against the tree, a terrific crack sounding in his ears. The pain vaporized in an instant. He had a brief moment to wonder if maybe they hadn't survived the fall after all - and wouldn't that be their luck, to make it back home...if this was indeed back home... only to be found as a pair of corpses a while later? - all before his vision flickered out completely and he lost consciousness.

A/N - I know, I know...back for one chapter and I'm already abusing everyone. More details of their little trip will be revealed eventually. Please review, so I know if I have some people interested in picking this bad boy back up!


	140. Chapter 139

Pride (In the Name of Love) 139 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - I forgot how crazy good it felt to get reviews filling up my inbox, the delight I take in torturing my fans...bwahaha. And oh, my. Wow, so, it took me a while to figure out a formatting thing that actually worked - I apologize for anyone new to the story that's reading where my header or footer got absorbed into the chapter due to my formatting lines vanishing and whatnot, or anyone that wanted to email me but couldn't because the link was destroyed. I'll have to go back and fix it (fanfiction dot net seems to be the most confused).

I did some research on freefalls. Terminal velocity (the speed your body reaches before it won't increase any more without assistance vs. air resistance) is about 120 miles per hour. There ARE documented cases on people surviving without a parachute...but even a fall of thirty feet - much less velocity - is often fatal. Skydivers do learn a 'five point landing' type thing to hit the ground in phases to absorb impact if a parachute malfunctions but that doesn't mean it spares them severe injury or death. Anyway, you're not here to listen to me babble. Long chapter because I couldn't find a good stopping point.

I'm a little uncertain of the direction I went in the end of this chapter... we'll see what y'all think.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Consciousness came to the monk with great difficulty. He was dimly aware, as his mind struggled to paddle through the thick, murky darkness of his removed state, that he was lying in an unnatural, awkward position. The air around him wasn't hot and dry, but rather cool and damp, smelling of grass and earth. He heard the soft rustle of wind through the leaves of a nearby tree, and he almost allowed himself to submerge back into the comforting, blissful dark caressing his senses and trying to pull him back under.

Then he moved the slightest bit, and came awake with a wheeze as pain ignited along his nerves like caged lightning. Blue eyes snapped open wide as he tried to get his mental feet back under him. He had no idea how long he'd lay where he was. His leg was twisted at an impossible angle beneath him, and one of his wrists was badly broken as well, both terribly swollen. More cuts, gouges and bruises were littered over his body than he could take note of.

/ Oh, dear Buddha, the pain... / Miroku squeezed his eyes shut tightly, tears of pain stinging them, gasping for air...and oh, how even that small motion burned, as if his ribs were compressed and bent out of shape. He slowly forced his eyes open to try and take stock of his surroundings.

/ Where am I?... / Dimly he noted the clear blue sky and the gently waving grass around him, confused and not understanding how he had come to be so desperately hurt, how he had come to be under this clear blue sky instead of the sandy desert. His mind kept drifting, his focus shaky at best and unconsciousness beating at the edges of his mind with dark black wings.

/ Focus...I must focus. I cannot lay here...wherever here is. Focus. / Miroku forced his stuttering consciousness into the familiar pattern of meditation, hoping he could distance himself from his earthly concerns enough to take a better look at where he was. His eyes slid shut heavily...and really, would it be so bad to return to that cool, blissful dark? Nothing had hurt then, it was only when he was forced to be awake ...

/ No. I must focus. I must find my center, find my balance, my peace. I am hurt, but only in body. Its a merely mortal concern. My soul is merely resting here. I am more than this earthly existence. I am free, I am light, I am a feather drifting in the wind. I... / Miroku's attempt at meditation shattered instantly and he managed to shoot into a half-sitting position, a sudden thought knifing cleanly through his disorientation. / Feather..SAIREX! /

The monk's eyes cast about until he locked on the sight of a battered mess of black feathers draped over the top of a fallen tree. The sight spurred new energy into him, although his body could ill afford the exertion. Miroku tried to get up, but he didn't have the strength for something like that. With a low moan, he set about the laborious task of dragging himself up the hill towards the tree, nearly losing consciousness every time his shattered leg or wrist bumped the ground. He made the tree after what seemed like a small eternity, and for the briefest of moments he forgot his pain, forgot everything except the sight of his broken raven.

The first thing he noticed was the blood...oh, so much blood. It had more or less dried in most places, although some were still sticky and gleamed darkly around the edges of the most obvious of Sairex's injuries. A sharp, rough branch about an inch in diameter had thrust through his back and was sticking out of his belly like a short and ragged spear. More blood...dear Buddha, the blood was everywhere, how could there be so much blood?... had at some point been trickling from Sairex's ears and the corner of his mouth. His wings were a shambled collection of broken, delicate bones. The raven's neck lolled at an odd angle and his hair was matted with more blood, from an injury Miroku couldn't see.

The monk tried desperately to crawl closer, unable to determine if his tattered lover was ... no, he had to be alive. He just had to. But the activity was too much for him, ragged and broken as his own body was and further weakened from exposure to the elements. He had no way of knowing that he had lain at the foot of the hill for the better part of three days. However, the exertion of trying to force his severely weakened body to obey him was too much. Everything went black as he tumbled into the heavy darkness of unconsciousness,. As he fell, he could think of nothing but the shattered and disjointed memory of a pair of fiery white eyes in a sea of shimmering gold.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

The wolf's ears perked up as it caught the scent of blood on the wind. It briefly envisioned the image of a fresh kill, but the smell was wrong. It was older, then. Probably Not-Food. It smelled like demon anyway. With a short whuff of air, the wolf trotted forward, over the edge of the hill, ears pricking forward as it listened. It followed the scent along the edge of the forest and out into a hilly, grassy area with a few trees scattered here and there.

A few more short bounds had it up on top of a hill. It's head cocked slightly to one side as it examined the ground, which was scuffled and torn. It sniffed a bit at the smashed and battered greenery before peering down. Near the bottom of the hill lay two bodies.

The wolf padded down the hill, ears flattening back as it approached them. The fallen demon, source of the blood-smell, was pale and not moving. A brief nudge with it's nose and a push of a paw produced no results. The wolf's gaze shifted to the other one, the human. The wolf shifted uneasily as the human made a low, rasping moan in the back of his throat. The wolf didn't like it. This human had a bad-meat smell, a sick smell.

The wolf backed off a few steps before bounding up the hill a short ways off, not wanting to be so close to the smell of blood and infection, the looming specter of death. Ah, but this was something the Alpha was looking for. The pack would relay the message, and Alpha would deal with it.

The wolf threw back it's head and howled. Distantly, it heard the voices of its brethren pick up the call.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Inuyasha let out a small, dispirited yawn. Weeks, now, of constant searching and border patrols had turned up nothing out of the ordinary. / Well, not what I wanted to find, anyway. / The patrols had turned up the usual things - the occasional stray demon that needed to be dealt with, a bandit or two...nothing noteworthy.

The hanyou let out a small huff and flopped back on his bed, letting out a little growl as Tetsusaiga's hilt jabbed into his thigh. "Stupid sword..." he muttered.

Things had gone from bad to worse in some ways and even Inuyasha had began to lose hope that the monk he loved like a brother and his quirky mate were likely dead. It had been the better part of a month since they had vanished without a trace save for the scorched, sandy mess in their room. It bothered Inuyasha a great deal to think that there had been no assault, no warning... one morning Miroku was in his life and by the same evening he was gone without a trace. It would have even been easier to see the monk fall in battle, rather than not knowing what potentially horrible fate had befallen his dear friend. No chance to say goodbye, not even a trace of him left to create some sort of grave or memorial to.

For a couple of days after Miroku and Sairex's disappearance, their daughter Aliana hadn't given it much thought at all, considering it something of a vacation. She could do whatever she wanted and play all day long with her beloved Uncle Toga as much as she wanted! Her enthusiasm for the constant play, which had been allowed in a futile effort to distract her from the truth, however, had waned and then altogether evaporated when her parents remained gone.

Eventually Toga had to confirm her teary-eyed fears that they may be gone, and she had been inconsolable for days after that. She was still painfully subdued and quiet and sad, spending most of her time curled up in Toga's lap while he sat at his desk doing his work or trailing after him when he went about the castle. He tried, usually without much success, to coax, bribe, tease, or goad her into play or a smile, the little raven girl's depression weighing heavily on him. The inu patriarch would have given half his lands to see her bounce into the room, wrapped in a sheet and demanding that she was going to be the best monk EVER as she slapped crayon-drawn talismans all over him.

Inuyasha jolted to his feet so fast that he nearly pitched over flat on his face when his door was slammed open and Kouga bounded through. "What the f-"

"Inuyasha! Quick, ya gotta come with me!" Kouga interrupted him, no hint of play or their usual insulting banter in his urgent tone. Before Inuyasha could even respond too much, the wolf was across the room and had bounded out the window.

The hanyou wasted no time bouncing out after him, flattening his ears as Kouga threw back his head and let out a loud, piercing howl. Kouga was dead silent for a minute, listening, and soon an answering howl came in the distance. That was all the wolf king needed, bounding out through the gate in the direction the distant call had come from. Inuyasha scrambled to follow after him, and was able to keep up only because it seemed Kouga wasn't running full out. As they tore into the forest, the hanyou noted dark lupine shadows flitting through the trees, and a few of the other wolves came to join them.

"Kouga, whats going on?" he managed to grate out, most of his breath focused on the task of running.

"My wolves found something. Sounds like its probably Miroku an' his bird, but they're in a bad way. We have to hurry. If they are alive still, it doesn't sound like they'll be that way long."

The hanyou struggled to contain the sudden wary hope that sprang to life within him, nodding grimly as he bent his head a bit more and picked up speed, bounding over fallen trees and ducking under the branches, his renewed speed coaxing Kouga's wolves to run even faster. However fast the hanyou could go, however, he was terribly worried it wouldn't be fast enough.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Miroku was adrift in darkness. His eyes slowly came open and he looked around. The world was shades of dark blues and purples and black, without definition. He was floating, suspended in the midst of this nothingness. Distantly, he saw the occasional spec of color swirl past. He looked down, taking stock of himself. His injuries were gone, as were his clothes...but somehow, it didn't seem to matter. Those were merely mortal concerns, after all. In fact, he doubted that his body was anything more than a familiar boundary for what he had come to know was his spirit.

In front of him, the eyes that had been haunting his dreams suddenly opened, slashes in the twilit dark of this place, this space between spaces. The swirls of darkness slowly melted as a creature of golden light slowly pulled out of it. The gold was at first just a shimmering field, a background for those white-fire eyes. Slowly the light began to bend and reshape itself, flowing into the shape of a great bird. Its beak was long and slightly hooked, that of a bird of prey, easily large enough to chomp the monk up in a single bite. A huge crest of backswept feathers adorned its head, shifting and indistinct, as if crafted of some sort of molten liquid, constantly shifting.

As the bird came forward it spread its wings with a great burst of white and gold light. Miroku distantly thought that, had he had eyes, he would surely have been blinded. Even his spirit form had an afterimage of those brilliantly blazing, long and elegant feathers stretching wide, impossibly wide. The bird was gone, however - it its place stood a creature that looked mostly human.

It was a female, clothed in a shimmering white dress that seemed made of light itself. Her hair spilled down her back, wisping about in an unfelt breeze, the same shade of molten gold as the glowing golden wings on her back. Her eyes had no pupils, just pools of burning white in her too-perfect face.. A gold belt and jewelry adorned her dress, and at her throat was a glistening golden ankh on a short chain.

Her voice was ancient and powerful, echoing deep in the middle of Miroku's mind. She did not speak words out loud, and Miroku had the distinct impression she had taken this form rather than stand before him in her full grandeur as it would have been more than his human spirit might have been able to bear.

SERVANT OF YOUR HUMAN GOD, YOU HAVE VIOLATED THE BOUNDS OF YOUR KIND.

"I never intended to violate anything, Lady." Miroku shifted a bit uneasily. Well, it was true, he had never really been the most...ah... model monk, but everyone had their failings, right? I mean, sure, there was some abuse of his power...but even when he had, er, extracted payment from a rich lord or talked his way into the mansion of some rich mayor, he HAD really performed services...exorcisms, protections, and...

I DO NOT REFER TO THE PRECEPTS OF YOUR GOD OR YOUR TEMPLE, HUMAN MAN. YOU HAVE VIOLATED THE LAWS OF TIME ITSELF BY PASSING THROUGH THIS PLACE.

Miroku cringed slightly, wondering if this powerful creature was simply going to eradicate him entirely, snuff him out with a mere thought. Surely she had the power. Apologies for whatever he had done to anger her sprang to his mind...but her tone, though powerful and deep, was not angry or threatening, just...heavy. He changed to a new tactic instead. "Where are we?"

WE ARE BEYOND TIME, BEYOND SPACE, BEYOND EXISTENCE ITSELF, IN THAT WHICH LIES BETWEEN, WHICH SURROUNDS AND FLOWS THROUGH ALL.

Miroku considered that for a moment, not really sure to react. He started then, looking at her. "Am I dead? Is this the afterlife?"

NO, HUMAN. YOUR BODY LIES NEAR DEATH, BUT YOU ARE STILL ALIVE. ANSWER ME THUS. HOW DID YOU COME TO ENTER THIS PLACE?

Miroku frowned. "I don't know how I got here, I was..."

THE FIRST TIME.

"Oh. Sairex and I were attempting to get back home when we got stuck in the past, and he came up with the idea of using the temple in the country we were in as a focus to try to return us home ...Sairex! Is he alive? Please, Lady, I must know!"

She was silent for a long moment, her eyes fixated on the monk who was suddenly awash in desperate, pleading sorrow. Her answer came with a rush of compassion, although her tone remained neutral.

HIS LIFE WILL BE GONE WITHIN MOMENTS, HUMAN MAN. EVEN THE BODY OF A DEMON CAN NOT WITHSTAND SUCH PUNISHMENT.

Miroku let out a pained cry, hunching over and hugging himself tightly. "No! Dear Buddha, no, please...I can't lose him...not after all we've been through! I need him!"

Slowly the woman's head cocked to the side as she considered the monk, a note of curiosity coloring her tone. BUT HUMAN MAN, WHY DO YOU GRIEVE? YOU NEVER REALLY HAD HIM TO BEGIN WITH. ALL MORTAL LIFE IS THUS. YOU ARE BORN AND BURN BRIGHTLY FOR AN INSTANT OF TIME BEFORE FADING AWAY. HIS KIND AND YOURS ARE DIFFERENT. IN A FEW SHORT YEARS, YOUR MORTAL LIFE WOULD REACH ITS NATURAL END AND HE WOULD BE BEREFT OF YOU. IT IS WHY YOUR KINDS RARELY JOIN. YOU ARE FATED TO SEPERATION FROM THE START.

Miroku winced at the thought, wondering if his tears were real or just in his imagination. "Be that as it may, I value all the brief moments I am allowed in my life and in the world...even if its selfish of me. I know Sairex and I would have been parted with my death, but he... he accepted ti as much as he was able to and loved me regardless. And you're right, my time is nothing compared to how long he's already lived, how long he could hope to live. Am I to die as well?"

YOUR BODY IS NOT BEYOND RECOVERY. EVEN NOW, YOUR FRIENDS WILL SOON COME UPON YOU.

Miroku hit upon an idea and gave her a desperate look. "Save him. Please. Don't let him die. I can feel your power..surely, you can."

YOU CAN NOT BEGIN TO COMPREHEND MY POWER, HUMAN MAN. I DO NOT INTERFERE. ALL THINGS RISE FROM AND FALL BACK INTO THE FLOW OF TIME. NOTHING MAY BE ETERNAL. IT IS TIME FOR THE RAVEN TO RETURN. EVERYTHING IS EQUAL. THE PRICE MUST BE PAID BY ALL.

"No...I..." The thought of losing Sairex was far too painful to bear. To be so calmly, if sympathetically, told that his lover was already as good as dead broke the monk's heart. "If a price must be paid, then take me in his place and let him live. I'll give whatever it takes. How can I live knowing the one I love so much is doomed to perish?"

HE LIVED KNOWING YOU WERE DOOMED TO PERISH.

"Its not the same. Maybe he's strong enough to come to terms with losing me because I'm human, even though he tried to fight it and pull me out of the timestream so I wouldn't die. Defy the laws of the universe itself. I'm not that strong. I can't just go about my life and accept his death so easily. I'm not that strong."

She was silent for a long time, contemplating. It could have been a moment or an eternity, it was impossible to tell in this place.. It could have been either or both.

I WILL PREVENT HIS DEATH AND RETURN HIS LIFE TO THE TIMESTREAM, HUMAN MAN, BUT THERE WILL BE A PRICE.

"Anything. I don't care what it is...Just save him, please."

I WILL RETURN HIS LIFE AND ALLOW YOU TO RETURN TO YOUR OWN. YOUR LIFE WILL BE BOUND TO HIS. FOR AS LONG AS HE LIVES, WHETHER YOU ARE TOGETHER OR SEPERATE, SO SHALL YOU BOTH. ON THE DAY THAT HE DIES, SO TOO SHALL YOU. BUT TO DO THIS, TO DO THE VERY THING THE RAVEN WISHED TO ACCOMPLISH AND REMOVE YOU FROM THE FLOW OF TIME ITSELF...YOUR SOUL WILL NEVER REST, NEVER BE BORN AGAIN. YOU WILL BECOME ETERNAL AND BELONG TO ME.

Miroku's eyes widened and he leaped forward, eyes shining with hope. "Oh please...I'll do it. I'd do anything."

DO YOU KNOW WHAT IT IS YOU OFFER, HUMAN MAN? DO YOU KNOW THE WEIGHT OF ETERNITY? YOUR ROLES WILL BE REVERSED, NOW. YOUR RAVEN WILL DIE LONG BEFORE YOU WOULD, AND YOU TOO WILL SHED YOUR MORTAL BODY. EVENTUALLY YOUR RAVEN WILL BE REBORN. YOUR SOULS COULD MEET AGAIN, OR REST IN PEACE. IF YOU ACCEPT MY OFFER OF SERVITUDE, THERE WILL BE NO END, THERE WILL BE NO FURTHER MEETINGS OF YOUR SOULMATE. YOU WILL NEVER GO TO THE ARMS OF THE GOD YOU DEVOTED YOUR LIFE TO SERVING. IS ONE LIFETIME WORTH THE PRICE OF AN ETERNITY?

Miroku stood and nodded slightly. "Yes, my lady. Just because I do not get to meet my god in the end doesn't mean I regret any service I've given, and it doesn't lessen my faith. That's not what faith is about. I don't do it for rewards, and I don't need to see my god to believe in him. If you need proof and logic of the existence of god, you are making what is holy into what is logical, turning spirituality into sensuality and defeating the purpose entirely. And anyway... If I can live out my life with Sairex, even at the price of serving you in eternity...I will do it. I'm sure that whatever your job actually is...maintaining powerful forces of the world, or watching over time itself or whatever...that it's very important. I... can accept giving myself to the cause of caring for the world if it means I get to be with Sairex. And when we do die, I can watch over him from here or wherever else if he's born again. I won't be able to be with him then, but I'll have all my memories of the time we shared. They are worth more than anything to me."

YOU ARE A RARE HUMAN INDEED. VERY WELL. THE BARGAIN IS STRUCK.

Miroku nodded his head in gratitude as she walked forward. Slowly, she extended one hand and rested it at the hollow of his throat. A pulse of power jolted through Miroku at that touch, shaking him to the foundation of his being. The power imbued within that slightest brush was incomprehensible, overwhelming. The power faded and Miroku felt something cool against his throat - a quick examination showed it to be a slender gold chain bearing a white and gold ankh dangling at the end, just like the one this woman wore. "Thank you, my lady," he whispered, bowing his head.

Before another thought could cross the monk's mind, however, he was whirling back through the twilit void, hurtling towards true, mortal consciousness.


	141. Chapter 140

Pride (In the Name of Love) 140 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - I really should have written what I originally had planned for this chapter with like half of the last chapter instead of writing the whole thing last night. XD Oh well. Thank you to all of you whom are reviewing via anywhere but ff dot net that I can't reply directly to - It's so very much appreciated. You have all made my time worthwhile. I've been bouncing around squeeing for the past couple days every time my email indicator lights up.

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

The trip had taken them a few hours. By the time they got remotely close to the hill, Inuyasha no longer had any need for the guidance of the wolves. He smelled blood, and a lot of it, with painful clarity. It was all too familiar.

Gritting his teeth, the hanyou put on extra burst of speed, exploding past the treeline and taking the hill in two strides, although he nearly choked as he skidded to a stop and caught sight of his two friends. Miroku was in a bad way - he was covered in gouges and scratches. His hand was jerked out at an awkward angle, the broken wrist badly swollen, but it wasn't anywhere as bad as the ugly, dark purple swelling on his shattered leg. The broken bone had torn through skin and muscle. Inuyasha could smell the dangerous scent of infection, even if the nasty coloring of the wound hadn't made it apparent. Miroku's breathing sounded wet and raspy, never a good sign.

But for as bad as gruesome as Miroku's injuries were, Sairex had gotten the worst of it. Inuyasha was afraid to go near the raven, not wanting to confirm his suspicions. He was sure, just from a glance, that there was no way he could possibly be alive.

Kouga hesitated a few moments before slowly making his way over. He intended to at least get Sairex off the thick branch that had impaled him and held him still - he had no intention of leaving the raven there. Even if it was the way of his own clan, he knew the others would want to give him what they felt was a more proper burial.

It was with complete shock that the wolf king noticed the raven's body hadn't gone cold. His eyes widened as he hesitantly leaned in closer. The raven's breath was so light as to barely be felt, his heartbeat impossibly faint. "Holy fuck..." he whispered, jerking back in surprise.

Inuyasha blinked up, startled, from where he had been working to get Miroku prepared to transport him back home so they could, hopefully, get him fixed up. "What?"

Kouga almost choked at the horror of Sairex's condition weighed against his discovery. "He's still alive."

"What?" Inuyasha gasped, unable to believe their good fortune. "But..."

"I...fuck me, I don't know what isn't broken on him.. He's got a fence post through his gut, his skull is cracked...holy shit, his neck is broken...the wings are a mess...its impossible. There's no way he can still be alive."

"We need to get them back as fast as we can."

Kouga gave Inuyasha a very worried look. "Inuyasha, I don't know if we can move him. If I try, its bound to kill him!"

"Yeah, well, if we leave him here he'll die for sure. We have to at least take the risk and TRY!"

Kouga frowned, reaching hesitantly for Sairex and then stopping. "You stay here with em. I'm going to go to the castle and get your brother...and he can do his zappy thing and take you all back to the castle. It's about the safest method I can think of to minimize how much they get jolted around. And that way Kagome and everyone can be prepared to help them out as soon as they arrive."

Inuyasha nodded, knowing the wolf could cover the distance in half the time he could if he went all out. "Alright. I'll stay here with them. Just...hurry."

Kouga nodded and then sprang off in the direction they'd come.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Toga sighed softly at the aggravating mound of scrolls piled on his desk and shifted Aliana in his lap a bit. Much as he wanted to comfort the sad little girl, he knew he was going to have to deal with some of these problems in person, and he couldn't very well take her with him when he bounced off to some neighboring towns to talk to various dignitaries.

Sesshoumaru saw his father's look. "Would you like for this Sesshoumaru to take care of matters, my Lord Father?"

Toga sighed and leaned back. "No, my Sesshoumaru. I'll have to go in person. Its an annoyance, but you know as well as I do that some of these ridiculous creatures we're forced to deal with on a daily basis would take it as an offense if anyone BUT the reigning Lord answered their petitions."

Sesshoumaru bared his fangs in distaste, a low growl in his throat. "I'm well aware. Its utterly absurd. They should be grateful we cater to as many of their whims as we do instead of imposing restrictions on us!"

"As much as I agree and would love to put some of them in their place, it serves multiple purposes. They are content thinking that they are getting our most serious and direct assistance in response to their requests. It proves that we value them as allies and members of our kingdom. However, it serves another purpose. It reinforces the position of our strength and dominance as well. You know as well as I do that a healthy dose of the respect we're granted by others is due in part to awe and part to fear. A confirmation of our power in the flesh goes a long way to quelling thoughts of rebellion before it even begins to form. And since we're being so helpful and merciful in light of our obvious ability to deny them beyond anything they could hope to do to us..."

"This Sesshoumaru hears and understands, but I do grow tired of the political dance at times."

"Well, 'this Sesshoumaru' gets to stay and care for the castle and matters while I'm gone."

Aliana looked up, blinking huge yellow eyes at Toga. "Can I go with you, Uncle Toga?"

Toga offered her a smile. "No, my dear little bird, you have to stay here. This is very important and I have to take care of things on my own."

Aliana looked about ready to panic at the thought of him leaving. "But Uncle Toga, I..."

"You have business with this Sesshoumaru, girl."

Aliana blinked, her protest clipped short, and turned to regard Sesshoumaru in mute surprise. Toga's expression matched hers, and Sesshoumaru had to refrain from smirking.

"Yes. It is high time you were learning to fight against strong opponents and working on your combat training."

Toga blinked. "My Sesshoumaru..." He let his protest die, however, noting the vaguely curious look the little raven girl was giving his pup, obviously thinking about that.

"But Uncle Shomaru, I'm going to be a monk. I exercise demons an'.. an' put talismans on them."

Sesshoumaru gave her an imperious scowl - he was very good at them - his voice somewhat disdainful. "What, you think all that monks can do is throw paper and pray?"

"Thats what my daddy does..." Aliana's tone lacked conviction, though, at the intriguing possibility that she might be wrong.

Sesshoumaru scoffed, and Toga's eyes lit up in amusement, gratitude and pride at his pup's actions. He had been at a loss with how to care for the little girl while he was gone and hadn't known how to deal with the situation. Sesshoumaru taking on the task was a pleasant surprise. "Your...daddy... does far more than that, girl. He has fought me before, he has fought my Lord Father before, he has fought my brother before, and he has done it well. I have seen him strike down several demons in combat. He is a trained and skilled fighter, for a human."

Aliana's eyes widened as she stared at Sesshoumaru, her melancholy melting as her interest was piqued. "My daddy can beat up demons? Why would he want to fight you and Uncle Toga?"

Sesshoumaru's eyebrow twitched a bit, but he managed to retain most of his composure. "We were...practicing. But yes, he can beat up demons with his shakujou very well."

"Whats that?..." The girl paused, then brightened. "Oh, you mean his stick?"

Sesshoumaru paused for a moment before nodding. "Yes." Toga could scarcely hide his good humor at this particular exchange and really wished he could stick around to see how it played out.

"Oooh...can you teach me how to fight too then, Uncle Shomaru? I need to learn how if I'm going to be the best monk ever!"

"This Sesshoumaru has many things to do..."

Aliana hopped up and bounced over to him, grabbing hold of the leg of his hakama pleadingly. "Please, Uncle Shomaru? I'll be the bestest learner ever and I promise I won't hurt you! Pleeeeease?"

Sesshoumaru appeared to consider this for a long moment, shooting Toga a glare as the elder inu bit his lip to contain his laughter at the thought of his son being beaten up by the mini demoness. "Very well. I will give you a lesson. Go change out of that dress. Have Rin or Kagome get you something more appropriate."

Aliana's face lit up in a huge smile. "Thank you, Uncle Shomaru! I'll be back!" Without further ado, the girl tore out of the room and down the hall.

"Do take care, my Sesshoumaru...I'd like to come back and find you in one piece."

Sesshoumaru scowled, giving Toga a glare, although there was no heat in it. "This Sesshoumaru is more than capable of handling a small, untrained child."

Toga laughed and clapped Sesshoumaru on the shoulder. "Famous last words, my son. I recall several occasions where you caught me by surprise." Toga's tone softened. "Thank you. I'm grateful for this. I should be back this evening or tomorrow morning." Before Sesshoumaru could wave the gratitude away, he leaned in to give him a brief kiss before releasing him and heading for the door.

Sesshoumaru watched him go, then waited for Aliana to arrive so he could show her to the practice arena.

o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o

Sesshoumaru eyed the practice sword with some disdain as he lifted it. He had to be armed to show he was taking the little girl seriously, but he did not want to dare risk swinging a real sword around. No matter how good his control, his father's words rang in his mind. He had, indeed, caught his father by surprise on occasion. The damage he'd done to the elder inu was of course always negligible, but he didn't trust his own reflexes enough to want the added risk.

Aliana had dressed in an outfit similar to the gi Rin usually wore during her own combat lessons.

"You may choose a weapon that you think will suit you," Sesshoumaru stated, gesturing to the rack of weaponry along one wall.

Aliana immediate picked up a short staff - well, short to a full-grown person at any rate - and smiled widely. "I'll use a stick like my daddy."

Sesshoumaru nodded. "Very well." He turned on his heel to head towards the center ring, wondering how he should start the lesson. The moment he completed his turn, a sharp explosion erupted in his skull as Aliana's staff connected with the back of his head. With a surprised snarl, the taiyoukai whirled to see the little demoness brandishing the stick like an absurdly long club and grinning fiercely in triumph.

The taiyoukai was about to inform the girl that their practice session didn't start until they were both in the ring and he had given her some basic instruction. Almost immediately, a sharp pain, accompanied by a tiny, squeaky little growl bit into the back of his leg. Sesshoumaru's sword snapped down instantly, coming back up with a shadowy little beast gnawing on it fiercely. It was roughly the size of a rabbit, its body round with small triangular legs and arms and cartoonish, triangle-shaped teeth jutting out of its shadowy, colorless mass. It let out another squeaky growl and clung stubbornly to the practice sword, chewing rabidly.

Sesshoumaru looked between the little fiend and the fiercely grinning demon girl and resisted the urge to slap himself in the forehead. This training session might turn out to be a lot more than he had originally bargained for.


	142. Chapter 141

Pride (In the Name of Love) 141 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - Ah, yes, poor Sesshoumaru. Well, he did ask for it after all... and he SO should have explained the rules BEFORE arming his crafty little devil of an opponent. Suppose I should pay up to all the people that bet she'd win, eh?

And thank you again to all my lovely reviewers... so many old names still reviewing this beast after its resurrection...I'm flattered. Truly. Much love!

x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x-x

Sesshoumaru had a deep, vast, newfound respect for his Lord Father. How in the name of all the powers that be had the elder inu dealt with him when he was a pup? His Lord Father had always treated him with total respect and taken him completely seriously no matter how absurd he was being. And when they had gotten into practice fights in the arena, his Lord Father had always made him feel like he was an opponent that presented a true challenge.

Of course, now that he was older, he could better translate those small, mysterious smiles of affection and good humor in ways he couldn't have when he was young. Toga had always had an air of mirth about him and a definite sparkle in his brilliant golden eyes. For a demon, the inu patriarch had the patience of a saint.

Sesshoumaru had always tried, subconsciously or openly, to be the very image of his Lord Father. It was a goal he had striven for his entire life, based first on a child's hero-worship and grown into a soul-deep yearning to be half as great as the amazing being that his sun still rose and set on. He knew he had set an impossible goal for himself, but Sesshoumaru liked to think he was at least, maybe, making a little progress.

Despite his best efforts at emulating his Lord Father, however, Sesshoumaru wanted to scream and rip out some of his glorious silvery hair. Attempts at patience and that inner good humor had gone up in smoke. Nothing could have prepared him for this round in the arena with Sairex and Miroku's daughter.

He had learned - surprisingly painfully! - that the little demon girl was faster than he had thought at first. Her wings were still far too small for flight, but she used them instinctively to propel herself forward or slow her momentum, to shift herself in a new direction from impossible push-off points. She lacked control and grace, but Sesshoumaru could fully appreciate how devastating she could be when she got older. He had seen Sairex fight, the way the raven used his wings to keep in motion more than his feet even when he was on the ground. He could halt his momentum or redirect it in ways that even Sesshoumaru had to envy. He himself was still bound by the laws of gravity and was committed to whatever direction he chose to leap in until his momentum had played itself out, and he could regain his center of balance and spring off again.

Of course, it was a trivial thing to keep up with Aliana when he was giving her his full attention. Indeed, any time he tried to look away, she would lunge at him and try to clobber him with her staff. Ordinarily, he would of course have trained his full attention on the little beast, but...

The girl had magic.

It had started out with the one small shadowy beast that had bitten him in the back of the leg with startlingly sharp teeth. Dozens of the fiends flitted about in the arena now, none bigger than a small dog, and no two seeming to have the same shape. They all looked like the drawings of a child - short-limbed, mostly featureless black shapes with blank holes for eyes and disturbingly wide triangle-toothed smiles cut off the paper and blown up into three-dimensional life.

These fiends seemed to be going about their own business. Some were sleeping, others just milling about. Some chased others around. Some fluttered about on impossibly small wings. However, any time Sesshoumaru dared to so much as glance away, they would dive at him to attack. Even a successful attack did nothing but cause the tiniest pricks of pain or much larger spikes of aggravation. Their teeth were not enough to get through his armor - they barely managed to pierce his clothing - but they hung on with stubborn tenacity. His claws would make short work of the beasts, as would a solid whack from the wooden sword he had snagged at the beginning of the battle.

Of course, Sesshoumaru had long experience with battles against multiple opponents, even taking into account the fact that he was usually fighting to destroy and not trying to be exceptionally mindful of his opponent's frailty - he could kill the girl with one solid strike, practice sword or not. His light whip and poisonous talons were entirely out of the question.

All of this, Sesshoumaru could have overcome.

Losing their sparring match, however, was something he wasn't prepared to cope with.

He was still on the ground, ignoring the pile of fiends that were gnawing at his armor, although he did reach out to smack one away that tried to chew at his hair, staring towards the ceiling in disbelief, a snarl twitching his lips. One moment he had been ignoring a new wave of Aliana's little fiends...and the next he couldn't move. Rather than latch on to him, the little monsters had bitten into his shadow, tugging it back. He attempted to smash one and his arm halted its progress mid-swing, to his surprise. Some of the demons had their teeth in his shadow's arm, holding it in place.

Sesshoumaru's shocked golden glare had snapped up to demand an explanation of this little demoness just in time to see her thrust her hands forward. Before he could respond fully, an overwhelming wave of mind-numbing exhaustion had overcome him. Shadow-bound and sleeping he had fallen to the floor after getting cracked over the head one more time with the girl's staff.

Had Sesshoumaru thought to erect any of his typical defenses or gripped some of his battle awareness around him, he knew this never would have happened. How was he to know he'd need to shield himself, though? He had come into this whole thing treating it as an indulgence, an amusement. His Lord Father's words burned unbidden in his mind, and his cheeks blazed at the thought he'd have to relay how things went. / Famous last words, my son. I recall several occasions where you caught me by surprise. / Oh, his Lord Father would be very, very amused at his expense... / This Sesshoumaru is NEVER having pups. /

Sesshoumaru scowled as he climbed to his feet, ignoring the girl's triumphant cheering. Her spells had only lasted for a mere moment after hitting him, even with all his defenses down... but in a real battle, that would have been a moment too much.

"Yay! Do I win, Uncle Shomaru?" Aliana bounced over towards him eagerly.

Sesshoumaru let out a low, dangerous growl, although he kicked himself mentally for it a moment later as he saw the girl recoil in wide-eyed surprise, her amusement gone in a flash of fear. Sesshoumaru closed his eyes and took a deep breath to steady himself. It wasn't her he was mad at, after all.

"Yes. You won our match."

"Does this mean I get to be queen then?" Aliana's smile had immediately switched back on.

Sesshoumaru's spine stiffened and he barely restrained from letting out another snarl of horrified shock and surprise. "What?"

"Well, you're Lord of the West and I beat you."

Sesshoumaru turned away, aware of the sound of wood splintering. He glanced down at the practice sword still clutched in his claws, now shattered from the force of his grip. "I'm not reigning Lord, you would have to defeat my Lord Father." Oh. Oh, dear gods and all that was holy. Losing his lands to a child for even a moment? Oh. Oh fuck, no. NO damn way...

"Ok! I'll have to wait until he gets back, though," the little demoness mused. "But you can all still live here!"

"How generous," Sesshoumaru ground out through his teeth, ready to break something. Maybe he could get into a much more satisfying sparring match with his brother and work out some frustrations. Yes. Yes, that would be wonderful.

Sesshoumaru's mounting, thunderous rage was shelved when the doors burst open and a panting Kouga stumbled into the room, taking a knee in uncharacteristic and immediate respect. "Lord Sesshoumaru, please, I need your help right away."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrow hiked, some of his ire melting as curiosity replaced it. Usually, the wolf was as much of a barbaric cretin as his brother. This display of proper respect was completely unexpected and instantly convinced Sesshoumaru to take him very seriously. "What is it?"

Kouga's eyes flicked over to Aliana for a moment and he held his silence. Sesshoumaru followed the direction of his gaze before turning to the girl. "You may continue your lessons with this Sesshoumaru at another time, girl. Go get cleaned up and play with Rin for a while. I have things to take care of."

Ali considered for a moment before beaming at him, bouncing over to throw her arms around his legs in a brief hug before bounding out of the room, her little shadowfiends bursting into dark smoke and vanishing as they followed her out.

"Stand and speak, wolf," the taiyoukai finally grated out, unable to repress a twitch of ire at the sight of the little beasts. Kouga knew better than to ask, however, and got right to the point after taking his feet.

"Inuyasha and I found Miroku and Sairex. They're both very badly hurt and we don't know if they'd survive being drug back here on foot. Inuyasha sent me back to ask if you'd do your instant moving thing and come get them."

"Teleport." Sesshoumaru couldn't resist filling in the appropriate term, although he was already heading for the door after tossing down the remains of his practice sword. "I will have Kagome prepare to treat the human monk and get the castle's healer to prepare to tend Sairex. Where did you find them?"

Kouga scurried to keep up with Sesshoumaru's long strides. Even though the inu's tone was level, he was moving urgently. Kouga knew he'd die before admitting an ounce of feeling towards Sairex or Miroku, but he couldn't hide EVERY trace of his concern, obviously.

"We found 'em at the bottom of a hill. Well, my wolves did, but...that's a moot point."

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes, his tone acidic. "Oh, of course. There is only one hill in all of Japan, I now know exactly where I need to go to retrieve them."

Kouga's tail lashed indignantly. "Dammit, I'll give you better directions when we're ready to leave, alright? You don't have to be an ass."

"Ware your words, wolf."

"You know that technically you don't outrank me by much, dog. You aren't reigning Lord, I'm a king, AND I'm mated to your brother."

"Oh? Be that as it may, I am still Heir to the reigning kingdom of these lands, and your people have sworn service to our crown. Only one outranks me, and it is NOT you."

"You're so damn much like your brother," Kouga huffed after a moment. "You just use bigger, fancier words and you're a damn sight more fatal about it."

Sesshoumaru growled, a clear threat and warning in his tone. Kouga wisely backed off, although he knew there was a time in the not-so-distant past that he never would have DREAMED of openly insulting Sesshoumaru with or without any degree of sincerity.

Sesshoumaru's expression went back into its typical aloof, icy mask as he swept into Kagome's room without knocking since the door was open. "Miko."

Kagome blinked. "Oh...hi, Sesshoumaru, Kouga. What's up?"

"The outrunners have found your human monk and my chief advisor, but they are badly wounded. This Sesshoumaru is going to retrieve them. Alert the medical staff of my castle and have a place prepared for them. Demonic healers will do little for your human friend, and you will do little for Sairex, so make sure everything is prepared on both ends."

Kagome gasped at the news before scrambling up. "Yeah, of course. I'll have everything ready by the time you get back. Please hurry, Sesshoumaru!" She was out the door in a flash.

Sesshoumaru nodded to her as she departed before turning to Kouga. "Directions, wolf. I can not transport myself without a clear destination in mind."

"Right." Kouga immediately began to relay instructions to Sesshoumaru, and when the inu taiyoukai was satisfied he knew the area the wolf spoke of, they were off.


	143. Chapter 142

Pride (In the Name of Love) 142 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - Wow! I've never actually been THREATENED to update before...although I daresay the thought of Sesshoumaru's teeth in me may not constitute a negative event. Or whipping. Hmm... This bears further contemplation.

Sessh - ... *glances at Vyperbites*... *glances at the Jezz-Ra*... What in the name of all that is holy did you commit this Sesshoumaru to, woman?

Sadly, nothing. I intend to proceed with updates. On with the show and all that. And I absolutely adore everyone that reviews. Honest, I do. You make it all worthwhile. Also, French Onion Sun Chips are delicious.

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He felt like he was floating. The air was oddly heavy and thick around him, suspending him in its flow, like a river without motion. There was no heat or cold. No sounds met his ears. He was tethered to something...he could feel the magic binding his soul.

Slowly, Sairex opened his eyes and looked around. A dim gray nothingness surrounded him on all sides. His mind worked only sluggishly, and his hands shifted to grip at the blazing golden tether that wound through his spirit and melted away into the distance, the cord simply fading from view.

He wanted to break it. His soul squirmed to be released. He struggled briefly, but couldn't get a grip on it, mentally or otherwise. His fingers passed through it as if it were no more than smoke, and yet there was no way to deny the feel of it, holding him to his heavy, broken physical body.

So broken. TOO broken. He hadn't been able to slow their fall enough, he knew. The shock of his body bouncing and tumbling over the ground when they had hit had outweighed the pain of snapping bones. The pain was lurking like some enormous beast that waited patiently, oh so patiently, for him to realize its presence so it could rear up and swallow him, monstrous and consuming. He had felt the tree suddenly arrest his crazed roll with final, fatal force. The middle of his back had impacted first. The thick branch jutting free of the downed trunk had punched an impossibly huge hole through his stomach, forcing out things that were never meant to see the light of day, bits of his torn innards glistening hot and wet with blood on the end of the jagged limb. Even that pain hadn't had more than a split second to register, however. The impact snapped his frame like a whip, his body uncurling and slamming back against the hard wood. He heard the crack as the vertebrae in his neck snapped from the too sudden, forceful impact. That explosion of sound was drowned out a moment later from his skull impacting, bone crunching. The pain had flickered out then as if it never had been, an all-pervading numbness wrapping around him, soothing him and easing him into a dark, thoughtless, blissful dark as the light melted out of stunned yellow eyes.

He didn't know what state Miroku was in, and could only hope that his body had provided some slight cushion to the monk's. His sorrow at the thought that Miroku may have indeed died was distant, like a dream he couldn't realize. He hoped with all the fervor he could muster in this strangely distant, lethargic state that his mate had lived.

Sairex was intimately familiar with death. He had, in fact, died himself more than once. He had seen countless others die from a wide variety of wounds. The fact that his body had not died instantly was a fluke, he knew. He assumed his spinal cord hadn't snapped when his neck broke, although the paralysis that had taken him led him to believe it had at least been sorely damaged. Vital organs had been shish-kabobed by that tree branch, torn and punched out through his belly. His skull had been smashed in. Even a demon couldn't withstand that much damage. There was absolutely no way he could still be alive. To be sure, a demon's body was strong and he imagined it could put up one hell of a struggle...

But if he wasn't dead and he couldn't be alive, what did that leave?

Sairex frowned, trying to cudgel his brain into coming up with some solution. He had no particular urge to be dead, really, although his soul was crying out for freedom from the torturous tether binding him to that impossibly shattered shell he had inhabited for so long.

/ Of course, I've never been dead for any length of time before...perhaps this is the true face of the underworld? How dull. Even when I was killed by Lord Sesshoumaru, there wasn't this emptiness. And this cord still ties me to my body. But if I was alive, i should be able to wake in some fashion, or at least not have this...disconnected consciousness. /

YOU ARE RIGHT, LITTLE DEMON. YOU ARE NEITHER DEAD NOR ALIVE.

Sairex jolted, distant surprise cutting through the heavy fog in his mind. It never occurred to him to speak in any language but his native tongue, even though the voice that had sounded in his head seemed to speak in no language he knew. It was more like blocks that formed into the shape of familiar words had been simply pushed into his mind one at a time. "Well, there's not much of a middle ground, and I surely don't think I'm either a ghost or undead."

NO. YOU ARE NOT.

The raven paused, closing his eyes and stretching out languidly, his fingers idly plucking at the golden tether that he couldn't quite touch. He felt something like a lazy sense of amusement at the whole situation, despite how serious the content of their conversation was. He just couldn't bring himself to care. "Well, then...what of me?"

YOUR BODY, AS YOU SUSPECTED, PERISHED.

"So my soul is tied to a dead body?"

YES.

"And I don't suppose you could share with this bird how that could be? I'm no spirit, I'm tied to the living world to a dead body, and somehow I'm not going to the underworld this time. Did I buck the system somehow? I mean, avoiding death is something my kin have always striven for, but if this is the result...well...let's just say it leaves something to be desired."

MY POWER HAS BOUND YOU. YOU HAVE DIED, BUT YOU WILL BE RETURNED TO LIFE WHEN YOUR BODY HAS HEALED ENOUGH TO ONCE MORE CAGE YOUR SOUL.

Something distantly was screaming a whole list of questions to Sairex's mind, but he couldn't bring himself to focus on any of them. It just didn't matter where here was, who he was talking to, or why he would be spared death...what godlike power had intervened. Out of the distant mire, one issue did force itself enough to the surface for him to voice a question. "Miroku?"

YOUR HUMAN MATE LIVES.

Sairex nodded and allowed the rest of his concerns to fade away. Miroku was alive. That was enough for him now. The raven drifted away into the peaceful gray, resting peacefully, and waited.

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Sesshoumaru's nose wrinkled a bit as he glanced at the destruction occupying Miroku and Sairex's crash landing. Inuyasha had already situated Miroku as gently as possible, knowing he'd have to lift him. Next had come the painstaking task of separating Sairex from the tree he was still impaled on. Inuyasha didn't wish to exacerbate the damage and so, rather than try and pull the raven free of the tree he had instead carefully severed the branch itself. He and Kouga laid Sairex out carefully on the ground, still strongly doubting that he'd survive anything more than another few moments.

Sesshoumaru lips twitched into a slight frown. "How is it they came to take such injury in the first place?"

Inuyasha shrugged as he plucked Miroku's shakujou out of the ground - it had been embedded halfway up the shaft and took some effort. "I don't know. I didn't see any tracks. It's like they fell out of nowhere, but...that's not possible. I mean, Sairex said he couldn't carry another person when he flew so they couldn't have gotten off the ground high enough to do this much damage. And when you have wings and shit, I don't imagine you fall anyways."

Sesshoumaru shrugged a bit, the mystery beyond him for now. "This Sesshoumaru will question them once they are healed." Without further ado, the taiyoukai called upon his energy and teleported the lot of them back to his castle.

The castle's medical staff was already waiting when they arrived. Even though she was expecting her friends to be grievously injured, Kagome couldn't help but let out a horrified little gasp at the actual sight of them, tears springing to her eyes. She didn't waste any time, however, in kneeling next to Miroku and drawing on her holy power to try to heal him, putting the gruesome sight of Sairex out of her mind as the castle's healers loaded him onto a board and carried him off to get to work.

The priestess couldn't recall ever praying so hard for the sake of one of her friends. She could feel the nasty infection that had settled into Miroku's limbs as if it were a tangible beast, writhing and squirming malignantly through his flesh and intent on consuming him. "Inuyasha?"

Inuyasha had been hovering nearby, wanting to help but not knowing how, left with little better to do than to chew nervously on his claws and watch. He was also simply being prudent - he was a half demon and didn't envy getting too close to Kagome's power while she was working. "Yeah?"

"I need you to...I need you to come set this bone for me. It has to be pulled straight again."

The hanyou made his way over, hesitating at the thought of the task before him. He swallowed thickly and wiped his palms on his haori. He wanted to help Miroku, but at the same time, he didn't want to touch him. He was too afraid that he'd do something to make these terrible wounds worse.

Inuyasha understood the necessity of the request, however, and he took a deep breath before gripping Miroku's broken leg firmly. It took a surprising amount of effort to pull the bone straight again from where it had slipped, and Inuyasha looked away at the fresh gush of hot, infected blood. Kagome cringed too but kept her wits about her enough to warn the hanyou to step back so he wouldn't get burned by her powers and set back to work.

Kagome didn't stop forcing healing energy into the battered monk until the very real specter of unconsciousness loomed before her eyes. She had given everything she had...but she wasn't entirely displeased with the result. She had managed to wipe all signs of infection clean. Most of Miroku's cuts and scrapes had vanished. His bones had been set and were weak, still in need of bracing and wrapping, but well on the way towards healing. Miroku's breathing no longer had a sick, rattly wet sound to it.

In fact, a moment later, a fuzzy looking set of blue eyes had opened, looking around in confusion. The monk tried to speak but all that came out was a rather dusty croak.

Inuysaha quickly went to get a glass of water as Kagome gave Miroku a teary-eyed, relieved - if careful - hug.

"Oh, Miroku, thank god you're alright...I was so worried!"

The monk let out a little wince as he attempted to sit up. Inuyasha helped him to sit up enough for him to manage a few small sips of water as the priestess busied herself with carefully bandaging his wrist.

Miroku finally had his bearings about himself enough to manage to speak. "Thanks, Kagome...Inuyasha."

"Keh, don't mention it, monk. Just...what the hell happened? Where have you been? How'd you... end up like this in the first place?"

Miroku flew to a sitting position and probably would have tried jumping up if the hanyou hadn't held him down. "Sairex! Dear Buddha, where is he? Is he alright?" Despite his bargain that he had made with that strange woman in his subconscious state, it did nothing to alleviate his need to see his lover, to confirm with his own eyes that he was alive and well.

"The castle healers are looking at him right now. He... he was hurt pretty bad, Miroku. Really bad."

"He's still alive?"

"I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it myself. Yeah. He's still kickin'."

Miroku slumped back, his adrenaline having played itself out. "As soon as they're done with him, I need to see him."

"Of course. So. What happened? How'd you get so hurt?"

"I'm...not exactly sure, to be honest. Somehow, we were sent back in time to a foreign country when Sairex accidently broke a magical amulet. We stayed there until he found out a way to try and get us back home, but I think something went wrong. When I woke up, we were laying on a hillside and...well. Broken." Miroku idly lifted his hand to finger the small golden ankh at his throat. If it hadn't been for that tangible proof, he might have thought that the whole thing had been a dream, brought on by his injuries.

"Well, yeah, it looks like something DID go wrong. Come on, I'll get you into a proper bed with some food and water and all that good junk. You still need a lot of rest yourself."

Miroku nodded, his head already drooping sleepily. "I do at that... thank you, my friends. Make sure you wake me when I can see him."

Inuyasha nodded as he scooped Miroku up. "I will. I'm glad you're back. I really would have missed you, you know." The hanyou got no answer, however. The monk was already asleep.


	144. Chapter 143

Pride (In the Name of Love) 143 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - My muse is trying desperately to get me to work on a chapter for another story and I'm fighting because I'd really like to finish this monster first but I'm not so sure I'm going to be getting a say in the matter. Ah, well. At any rate, I'll plod along on this one regardless. I may end up having to get the other plot bunny off my chest though. Heh. It deserves it, considering it helped fire me up to write again, ne?

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He felt something warm lightly brushing across his cheek. It took a moment to connect the sensation with reality, and a soft sound of protest slipped from his throat. The caress was infinitely gentle, but it served as a catalyst to draw him further from the heavy, blissful dark, forcing him into a world of impossible pain. He dimly became aware of further sensations. His senses felt a seeming net of magical strands binding his wings like a web, although he couldn't feel his actual wings. Another sort of web was preventing him from moving his head more than the barest fraction in any direction.

Against his better judgment, Sairex slowly cracked his eyes open, tears stinging at the edges. His whole body was awash with pain of varying degrees. His vision swam, and it took almost more effort than he had to focus it.

Toga gave him a soft smile, lightly brushing a few more strands of hair back from the raven's face, still ashen and hot with fever, although he was much better than he had been. "I was beginning to think I'd not see those pretty eyes of yours again, my dear little bird."

The corner of Sairex's lips twitched up in the barest of smiles despite his agony. He didn't even want to think how crushing the pain would be without the help of the powerful pain suppressants that must be in his system. He had taken note of the needle in one arm attached to a bag of some mystery substance from Kagome's world.

"Don't try to move too much. The healers have been doing all they can, but you were damaged pretty severely. They're exhausted and resting...but they've been in here non-stop. You had so many broken bones, my friend. Your wings are still something of a mess... but they say they should be able to fix everything given enough time. Just try to stay still...some of the healing is still very fragile."

Sairex didn't even have to say anything, just slowly rolled his eyes over to give Toga a LOOK.

Toga chuckled softly. "Right, right... I suppose you probably aren't up to much in the way of acrobatics at the moment. I'm sure this is another statement rife with stupidity, but...how are you feeling? "

Sairex swallowed and let his eyes slide shut again, his voice coming out barely above a breathy whisper. "Hurts. Everyting hurts."

Toga frowned in sympathy, wishing there was anything he could do to help his friend. "Between the healers and things the Lady Kagome brought back from her world, we're doing all we can. I was... certain I would lose you when I came home to see the state you were in...and that was after they had already been hard at work. What on earth happened to you two?"

Sairex allowed his eyes to slit open again to regard the inu. The room was lit only with an oil lamp and he was thankful for the dim atmosphere, although it wasn't difficult to pick out Toga's gleaming golden eyes, still so full of concern and a good measure of relief. He intended to answer Toga's questions, but he had more important ones of his own first. "Vhere is Miroku? How is he?"

"He was here until a short while ago. Inuyasha and Lady Kagome drug him off to force him to eat something. He's hardly left your side. One of his wrists and a leg are still damaged, but he's otherwise more or less patched back up. He'll be back in as soon as they let him go, I'm sure."

Sairex let out a soft sigh of relief. It was good to hear that his mate had not only survived but was well on the road to a full recovery. Slowly his eyes slid back shut for a while, basking in the simple gratitude that they both would live to see another day, that they wouldn't be torn apart or broken beyond repair. / Although from the sounds of things, I should have been beyond repair... /

The raven cudgeled his brain but the memories he had of his time in that dark gray nothingness were wisping away like smoke. He recalled the barest snippets of conversation with some being of impossible power, but he couldn't remember what was said. Perhaps it had been a dream, hadn't happened at all. Perhaps the damage he had sustained, despite its severity, hadn't been QUITE as thoroughly fatal as he had assumed?...

"I can let you rest if you like. I'm glad that you've finally come to, though. We were so very worried."

"No." Sairex let out a soft sigh. "I don't know... how much Miroku has already told you."

"He told us everything up until what happened when you started casting the spell to try and move you through time and bring you back home. He says he lost consciousness fairly soon after it began."

"Zo did I, but not until I had gotten da whole ting cast. It... I misjudged da powers I vas messing vith, Toga. It svept me avay. It vas all I could do to try and grab for a vay to get us back out of da place I put us in." Sairex was silent for a long while, exhausted from the effort of so much talking. Toga figured the raven had fallen asleep and was a bit surprised to see him continuing to speak.

"Vhen I came avake, ve vere out of da ztream of time...if dat's vhere ve vere. But ve vere very, very far off of da ground. I don't know how far ve had already fallen. I couldn't zlow us down enough. I'm not ztrong enough to carry another person vhen I fly and I never much bothered vith zpells zuch as levitation."

Toga nodded. It was no surprise to him that Sairex couldn't carry someone. He'd known already. The raven demon's own physical makeup was specially adapted so he could fly in the first place. It hit him then, and he closed his eyes in horror at the thoughts that must have been going through his friend's mind at that time. No fall would be a problem to Sairex alone. All he had to do was let go of Miroku and he would have easily walked away without a scratch. The results made it very obvious what had happened. He had risked his life, gambled on the long shot that he might be able to save the life of his mate, maybe even at the cost of his own.

"I zlowed us down as much as I could. Miroku vas unconscious da whole time, and I'm glad for dat. Ve ztill landed vay too hard. I did vhat I could to try and protect him."

"You saved his life, I'm sure. Humans don't fare too well hitting the ground from heights."

"Neither do raven demons, apparently. I haven't fallen from any height zince I vas zmall." Sairex paused for a moment, thinking. "How is Aliana?"

"She's been in to see you a couple of times. She left you some flowers that her and Rin picked and this get well card." Toga reached over to the endtable and plucked up a sheet of paper, holding it up for Sairex to see. The raven couldn't help a weak chuckle. He had no idea what the bright crayon drawing was actually supposed to depict, but it warmed his heart anyway.

Sairex frowned a bit when he found himself unable to lift his hand to take it. His fingers twitched, but his arm felt heavy and dead, not wanting to respond to his command. A moment later he felt Toga's hand gently holding his wrist down.

"You broke your neck when you fell and caved in the back of your skull to boot. The damage is only just beginning to heal enough to start breaking you free of your paralysis. Please, don't try to move."

Sairex managed to roll his eyes, his tone sliding into a more familiar, flippant range. "Kaa, tell da paralyzed bird not to move around too much. Very funny."

"I'm only following orders. I'm scared of what Miroku and Aliana would do to me if they found out I wasn't taking what they deem proper care of you."

As if on cue, Miroku hobbled his way into the room, supported by a crutch on one side and Inuyasha on the other. "Sairex! You're awake!"

Toga stood up with a smile. "I'll leave him in your care, then. Make sure you both get enough rest. I need my advisors whole, after all." Toga leaned over and brushed a kiss to Sairex's forehead before heading out of the room.

Inuyasha helped Miroku into a chair, unable to help a grin as Miroku leaned forward to lightly take Sairex's hand. "Keh, my old man was almost as worried about ya as Miroku was. He's been in here more than not since he got back a couple days ago."

Sairex just smiled, already exhausted from the efforts of speaking.

"Well, I'll leave you two alone. It's great that you're awake, though. Best news we've had in a while." The hanyou slid out of the room with a slight wave, a bit of a bounce in his step. He hadn't lied, of course - a dreadful, ominous weight had settled on the castle ever since the two of them had been found. The healers had doubted Sairex would wake no matter their efforts - they were shocked that he survived, and even more surprised that their efforts were paying off as wholly as they were. They'd been unsure if they could reverse the paralysis and had almost given his wings up as a lost cause. Remarkably, everything went far better than they could ever have hoped.

Miroku gave Sairex a grin. "If we were a little less banged up, I would kiss you until dawn and never let you go again. You'll have to settle for a mental image and my good intentions, however."

"Vell, at least ve vouldn't have to vorry about your cursed hand dis vay. It zeems to be da one dat's injured."

Miroku affected a wounded look. "My love, I don't know what you are possibly accusing me of. You know very well that I would behave. I am a man of the cloth, I would never take advantage of you."

"Only because of da extent of my injuries. I don't put anyting past you in regards to dat hand."

Miroku chuckled and did lean over to press a - mostly - chaste kiss to the raven's lips, his tone far more serious when he did speak. "You can't know how much I love you."

Sairex did smile at that. "I know."

Miroku smiled and then leaned back a bit in his chair, still holding one of Sairex's hands captive in his good one. "Well, I suppose you might have an inkling."

Sairex regarded him for a moment before slowly cocking one eyebrow. "Vhere did you get dat necklace?"

Miroku blinked before laughing. Of course Sairex would notice the ankh. He rarely missed details with those sharp eyes of his. "Leave it to you to notice something shiny."

Sairex snorted. "I don't remember zeeing it before..."

Miroku contemplated his answer for a moment. He would never lie to Sairex, but he wasn't entirely eager to tell him the whole truth just yet either. "I acquired it on our travels ."

Sairex's keen gaze locked on him for a long moment, and Miroku had a very real fear that he was going to be telling the whole story very soon. Sairex simply let out a little sigh, however, and let his eyes slip shut. His voice was a low murmur, dripping with exhaustion. "I'll ask you about it later, den...vill you tell me?"

Miroku nodded. "I promise I'll tell you everything when you're better."

"Dat vill have to be good enough for me, den. I need to zleep. Vill you ztay vith me?"

Miroku smiled, lifting the raven's hand and pressing a soft kiss to it. "Always, love. I promise I will always stay with you."

The monk stayed awake for a long time, watching Sairex with a smile. / I will stay with you for the rest of your life and watch you for the rest of mine. No matter the price I had to pay for this...if my life ended this very moment, it would have been worth it just to touch you, to have one last look at those beautiful eyes, one last taste of your smile. You are worth everything to me. I have no regrets. /

It didn't take long for Miroku to join Sairex in sleep.


	145. Chapter 144

Pride (In the Name of Love) 144 / ?

Written by Jezz-Ra

Warnings - Not all warnings apply to all chapters. Yaoi, Het, Rape, Lemon, Violence, Torture, Language, Angst, Incest, Dark (at times). It's a massive story, folks, it's got a little bit of everything.

Disclaimer - I don't own Inuyasha, don't make money off it. Wish I did.

Sidestories can be found under my author profile at any of my archive sites.

Archived at - inu. fanfiction. net, fanfiction. net, and mediaminer. org ::: Anywhere else, ask!

Questions or Comments? Email me at megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com ((remove spaces))

Update List - If you wish for new chapters of this story to be e-mailed to you directly, please send me an email and I'll add you to my update list! Chapters will be mailed as soon as they're ready to go! If you are on my update list, I still appreciate reviews at any of the usual sites I post to!

/ Blah / indicates thoughts.

A/N - Yay for writing too many stories at once! Rofl. I had the most bizarre dream last night involving mixed up, mashed up plots from this story and the other I'm currently writing (a Tsubasa RC fic. I can't help it, I love Fai to pieces). It was...very bizarre. Lol... and I had to rewrite half of this chapter... for some reason, my Toga was sounding a lil too much like my Fai... And damn, this chapter got wordy.

I have so many good crossover stories I could write, but as a rule I avoid doing so... I don't know why. Most crossovers are just poorly done, it seems...too contrived. But sometimes, the ideas are intriguing... lol.

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Sesshoumaru glared pointedly at the wall, refusing to look at his father.

Toga was grinning ear to ear, his eyes sparkling in devious amusement. "Queen of the West, eh?"

"With all due respect, my Lord Father...shut up," Sesshoumaru growled, painfully aware of the blush staining his cheeks.

"Oh, but my Sesshoumaru...! I thought 'this Sesshoumaru' was entirely capable of handling a small, untrained child?"

Sesshoumaru let out an unhappy little growl, and Toga burst out laughing, kicking back in his chair and folding his arms behind his head. He was extremely amused at his pup's expense. Aliana had latched on to him the moment he got home and told him of her victory in the arena. Toga had thought it amusing, right up until he confirmed the story and what exactly happened with Sesshoumaru. THEN he had found it beyond hilarious.

"I tried to warn you. Children are devious. They will catch you by surprise."

"This Sesshoumaru is never having pups. Ever."

"Oh, don't say that. You have no idea how much different it is when they're your own."

"If I had to deal with things like that on a daily basis, I'd have torn my hair out within a week and died of stress by the following."

"You gave me much more than my fair share of hair-tearing moments, I can assure you. It's one of the hazards of parenthood. But trust me, my Sesshoumaru... it was much more than worth it. I'd love to see you have some pups of your own someday."

"So you could steal them and spoil them rotten?"

Toga grinned. "That's one of the privileges of being a grandsire, is it not?"

"This Sesshoumaru is still surprised that the raven's daughter still wants to be a monk with as much as she idolizes you."

"Well, I think she wants to be Queen of the West by conquest, now. And she was so close..."

Sesshoumaru let out a new growl at that. "Damn you..."

Toga laughed, still finding it almost painfully humorous. Oh, what a blow to his pup's pride to be defeated by a small child, no matter the circumstances. He figured it was good for his son to have his ego checked now and again. / Pride, thy name is Sesshoumaru... /

"I hear Sairex has awakened."

Toga decided to show mercy and allow the change of subject. "Yes. He's still in pain, but that's to be expected, all things considered."

Sesshoumaru was silent for a few moments. "Soon we will have to press our attack against the Black Circle, now that the two that can access it are back. The longer we wait, the more opportunity we afford our opponent to build up his forces and plot against us in turn."

Toga nodded, idly twirling a few strands of his hair around one of his fingers as he thought. "The only reason I can figure that he didn't press his advantage and attack us while we couldn't retaliate was that he had no knowledge of Sairex and Miroku being first missing and now injured. Now would still be an ideal time for him to strike, especially if he thought he could get a kill in on one of those two. Most notably Sairex. We cannot let it slip any further than it already has that anything happened to them."

"Should that wretched Jormander think he had a clear shot at the raven, he'd throw everything he had at us. I do not believe he could match us in military strength at present, but he has proven in the past that he was capable of sneaking into the castle. The raven wouldn't be able to fend off much of anything that might be thrown at him in his current state. This Sesshoumaru will make sure that the healers and anyone else involved knows to keep their silence."

"Good, good. We're already at a disadvantage, we don't want to make things any worse. And I'm sure you're right about his military at present. If he had the forces, I wholly believe he would have already engaged us. Sairex and I decimated the forces we encountered at his castle and when they came at us during the war, countless more were cut down."

"Perhaps we could have them make us a portal...myself, you, my brother... and we strike him at the heart before he is ready. Even if he has some scattered troops, I doubt they could stop the three of us working in concert before we could make our way to the head."

Toga considered it for a moment. Sesshoumaru wasn't usually one for straight, head-on attacks of this sort and, truth be told, neither was he. Rarely was a battle won just by charging at the enemy's front door. However, it did seem rather like it might be a valid tactic in this instance. Except... "That's fine and well, but when Sairex and I attempted just that, the raven showed me many barriers protecting all facets of his castle. You saw what had happened to my arm when I came back. I couldn't force my way through the barrier. No power I had was capable of breaking it down, and I almost lost an arm for the effort. I couldn't even see the barriers until I was touching them without Sairex to point them out."

Sesshoumaru smirked. "You forget, my Lord Father... Inuyasha has improved your fang. He now can dissipate and disrupt barriers of all varieties with it."

Toga smiled at that. "You're right, I did forget about that. Hmm. I wonder if I could pull off a trick like that with my own fangs given a bit of work..."

Sesshoumaru paused, thinking about that, and his smirk only widened. "Oh, yes. I can see you leaping face-first into barriers in an attempt to bite through them."

Toga couldn't help a chuckle, shaking his head a bit at the mental image of himself in his true form diving forward to gnaw on a barrier like an oversized chew-toy. "No, I suppose that wouldn't be the most prudent of ideas. Besides, I doubt I could duplicate the method Inuyasha used regardless, even if I knew the details. The fang he has now is far different from the one he originally received."

"You always knew he would need that fang to protect him, didn't you?"

Toga nodded slowly. "I didn't know for sure, but I assumed there was a good chance of it. Demonkind and humankind don't usually mate for a great many reasons. Most demons are far too small-minded to have higher emotions and those few that are on a level of higher intelligence and are capable of such feelings rarely are willing to accept the guaranteed heartache of opening their heart in such a way."

Sesshoumaru, to his credit, said nothing. He merely stared at his hands, for once not criticizing or insulting his father for his past relationship with Izayoi. His eyes had been opened far more, and he found that, despite their general weakness, humans weren't all that different from demons. He wasn't about to promote their wellbeing, but he could at least understand how one could have caught his father's eye.

"I... did a bit of research on hanyou. Human blood and demon blood rarely mix well. Humans are relatively fragile creatures in comparison to our own race...and our bloodline in particular makes that gulf much larger. Most hanyou tend to fall apart as they grow and their power begins to develop. Their halves war within them... there are many factors. Sometimes they die... sometimes, like in Inuyasha's case, the demon blood is...far more potent than the human blood can stand and their human side is simply overwhelmed, destroyed."

Sesshoumaru sighed before speaking, phrasing his question very carefully. "If you knew there was such a risk that you might create such a cursed thing, why did you ever..."

Toga smiled a bit. "I loved her, my Sesshoumaru. Such thoughts of what might be didn't arise until after the fact. We tended to forget our differences when we were together. It's no different than ignoring the social taboos I do when I'm with you." The inu patriarch sighed heavily after a moment. "Your brother is indeed cursed by my blood, no matter that you might argue the opposite. I forged the Tetsusaiga to both protect his mother and to give to him to seal his power."

"I've seen the demon he becomes when he is distanced from the seal. You are entirely correct. He would become a bloodthirsty, unthinking animal without it."

Toga frowned deeply. "I know. I simply don't have the power or the knowledge to do anything to harmonize the two very different halves within him. The seal within the Tetsusaiga was the best I could do. It does weigh heavily on my heart to know how small a step it would be for him to lose himself. I never want to see either of you suffer, and it seems I've rather done a poor job of preventing just that."

Sesshoumaru's gaze snapped up to look at Toga. "My Lord Father... "

"I know, I know. I never did it on purpose...but it still hurt. The last thing I thought before I died was how very sorry I was that I was forcing you into the role of Lord when you were still so young, knowing all the issues that came with it. My Sesshoumaru...I am so very sorry for all the burdens placed upon you because of my mistakes and my failings."

Sesshoumaru's eyes were still impossibly wide. He simply couldn't process the thought of his beloved Lord Father, his idol, his god-thing, making mistakes or errors, especially not ones grave enough that they required apology or regret. "You do not need to apologize to this Sesshoumaru, my Lord Father. Not now, not ever. Please, do not." Slowly Sesshoumaru got up, padding over and kneeling next to Toga's chair, bowing his head. His voice was soft and thick with rarely expressed emotion.

"I am all that I am because of you, for better or for worse. Nothing in all my world means a fraction of what you mean to me. I would do anything at all on your word alone. You have always, always treated me with kindness and respect and your love has never been in question. When you died, I lost the most important thing in all my world, and it was impossible to recover. I was hurt and bitter and I took it out on anything that came near, trying to mask the void with rage or pain, but I could never hope to succeed. So please... even if you have done things that you consider a mistake, I know you always follow your heart. You are always true to yourself. I place no blame or fault on you for anything you have done."

Toga blinked before lightly reaching out to run his fingers through Sesshoumaru's hair. After a moment, he slid his hand down to cup Sesshoumaru's cheek and tilt hsi face up so he could look him in the eye. A long moment of silence passed before Toga gave him a small smile. "I don't believe I've done anything to warrant such pure devotion from you, my Sesshoumaru, but I cannot say it doesn't warm my heart. Even I make mistakes, and I will not let anyone else take responsibility for them and will not sweep them under the rug. Come here."

So saying, Toga pulled Sesshoumaru up into his lap before curling his arms around him and leaning in to give him a long, slow kiss. Sesshoumaru smiled faintly before simply leaning against him with a soft sigh. Toga stroked his hair and just held him. A long while later he finally shifted a bit, although he made no move to dislodge Sesshoumaru. "Alright... let us come up with a plan of attack. It is time to end this threat."


	146. Chapter 146

I realize that this is not something I'm supposed to do - author's notes and whatnot constituting a place given over as a chapter. However, I feel it is my duty as an authoress to update my community (if anyone is still listening.)

This will be a brief message detailing plans for the story in question, where I've been, and where else this can be located in case ffnet cracks down on me...because anyone reading this knows about the lemon flavoring I've injected into most of my work and, if their bots pick me up, 'Pride" (and possibly my others) will be axed off the site. Never fear - I'm in other locations as well that won't do that (and will be detailed below).

First, I apologize to anyone reading these fics on ffnet. I realize that they changed something somewhere along the line, and it stripped part of my formatting...most notably page breaks. There is no division between my author's notes and the story itself. I am making an effort to correct that.

If anyone knows of a good, free word processor that doesn't have formatting half the websites out there won't accept, I'd appreciate suggestions, just PM me. (remember, links don't work on here too unless you add spaces).

That being said...

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Firstly, my reason WHY this seeming abandonment of my story has occured:

I have not abandoned this story, I've just had a lot of things happen since I was last able to write or was in much of a writing mood.

I moved house in with my father and his mother, to take care of my grandmother during her final years, and that took a significant portion of my time. When that was finished, I moved again to live with my father. I was helping him out with what little help he needed (he lost a leg due to diabetes and, while fully able to care for himself and functional, there are a few things that having two legs makes easier. Heh.).

Things seemed to be going fairly well, and I added a few chapters and was making the plans I needed to finish this bad boy so I could get started on a sequel. xD Because I'm like that. Then, a couple weeks later, I got word that my little brother had gone missing. He remained so for 24 days before they found him. He had been in a rollover accident (we knew that part) during a terrible blizzard on his way home, and it took them that long to find his body. He didn't even have a jacket. He walked about a mile and a half in his work clothes, no socks, t-shirt...climbed over a couple barbed wire fences and ultimately fell to hypothermia.

That more or less killed my writing groove, as he was my only sibling and I don't have much in the way of family.

So I finally started getting things together so I could start writing again after a long and painful year of getting my head straighter than it was and crap. I began doing a revision, update, and edit to change formatting so it wouldn't be stripped out on this site or others, fixing potential mistakes, minor updates to Sairex's speech patterns in his earlier moments before he was better defined and I realized I'd keep him in Pride...blah blah.

On April 19th, my father died. He was probably the closest person in the world to me, and a lot of my personality and writing mojo and things that I do were directly relatable to him. His death was entirely unexpected and floored me and everyone else. He was only 61. His heart function declined from a healthy 60 percent a year ago to only 10-15. He got pneumonia and an infection and the whole mess of it took him down. I'm still reeling from it.

Sooo. That put me in the position to have to move back into my mother's house, where I started this whole story. And now that I'm here again, back in the land of no-internet-worth-mentioning (we live in farmland and the only options are satellite or dialup. Sat's tolerable for some things but useless for gaming and such)... now that I'm here and can't do half my former hobbies, boredom if nothing else will drive me to start writing again. It's why I started in the first place...boredom and loneliness lol.

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On to the - WHERE DO I FIND YOU IF YOU'RE AXED OFF THIS SITE BECAUSE I DON'T WANNA MISS SOMETHING! portion.

The absolute best, number one most reliable place to find my work is on my Dreamwidth page. I check it every day, and it has every fic I've posted recently or in the past, including ALL of Pride and its sidestories. It's all prettified, with cute icon pictures and colors, formatting, etc.

It got a fresh edit, I am in the process of re-editing it again as we speak AND have two beta-readers taking a stab at it as well (I never had anything beta'd before, and if anyone else is interested in also taking a look for specific things, especially if you know this story or my others well, I'd appreciate it!). Anyhow, Dreamwidth is my hotspot where all my absolute most recent edits, posts, stories, information, etc. is listed. You can find me at:

Jezzra . Dreamwidth. Org. ((obviously, remove the spaces, I can't put links in here.))

However, if you either hate Dreamwidth, its not working out for you, or you just plain old prefer something else... I can also be found at Mediaminer. org, Adultfanfiction. net, and (once my latest edit is done and beta'd) Ao3. If you need more detailed information on how to find my work, feel free to send me a PM or even an email. My email is visible in my profile (megami _ no _ remon hotmail. com). Just make sure you put something in the subject line so I know it isn't spam mail...and if I don't respond I apologize. I also check my email every day and it has, in the past, deleted some personal mail that it thought was spam.

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On to...THE PLAN! THE FUTURE OF PRIDE (and others)!

Yes. They have one. It may just be the ending. It may have a sequel that will go on for who knows how long. It may have more sidestories. I really cant' imagine myself writing Inuyasha-verse stories and not using my characters as they've grown and become in the course of writing this beast, so...any future work I do in the fandom will likely end up being related in some fashion.

And my other fandoms, notably RK & TRC - will not go un-updated. I intend to finish my WIPs in those regards just as wholly as I intend to for Pride.

They, too, are in their most recent (and another working) edit stage, with live copies on my dreamwidth page if nowhere else.

My goal is to first finish the formatting edit. I will then repost everything to my various posting sites (the live version that I work on is already up on DW - I'm editing off that copy directly as I lost my main copy to a computer crash lol).

After I have everything re-edited and reposted - which shouldn't take too long, depending on how life treats me - I will settle in and start writing again.

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So, while I'm sure its not what you hoped for in a new chapter, this is my official apology, my plans, and most importantly, the way to find my works to see the conclusion of various things or for future reading in case the ffnet bots do indeed pick up on my, ah... disregard to the rating limits and my choice to post my works here, unedited and with plenty of lemon filling.

I hope you continue to enjoy my stories, wherever you may find them.

Cheers, all!

~ The Mighty and Incomparable Pharaoh Jezz-Ra


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